


Minyard-Josten Rivalry

by Rory_writes



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Andrew Minyard Has Feelings, Andrew Minyard Loves Neil Josten, Andrew Minyard has autism but that's just my interpretation of his character and not anything 'new', Canon Compliant, Demisexual Neil Josten, Established Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard, Foxes, M/M, Minyard-Josten Rivalry, Multi, Professional Andrew Minyard, Professional Neil Josten, Soft Andrew Minyard, Soft Neil Josten, Soft Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard, Standard references to canon trauma, long fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:07:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 189,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26564845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rory_writes/pseuds/Rory_writes
Summary: My take on the Minyard-Josten Rivalry/Pro Andreil!A long collection of sequential scenes throughout Andrew and Neil's lives, post books.Including, but not limited to, my interpretation of the Minyard-Josten Rivalry, the old Foxes playing with kittens for a YouTube video, so much soft and sweet Andreil you will get cavities, and headcanons I have been thinking about all year.(Not complete, but still being written)
Relationships: Allison Reynolds/Renee Walker (All For The Game), Jeremy Knox/Jean Moreau, Katelyn/Aaron Minyard, Kevin Day/Thea Muldani, Matt Boyd/Danielle "Dan" Wilds, Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard, andreil - Relationship
Comments: 1391
Kudos: 1299





	1. "Neil Josten Isn't My Friend."

**Author's Note:**

> Andrew Minyard at his first ever press conference as a pro player!  
> Accidentally starting the Minyard-Josten Rivalry.  
> Andrew makes a new friend!
> 
> Beta read from like chapter 6 onwards!

Andrew Minyard toyed with the water bottle that had been placed on the long table in front of him. It was clear with a blue label, nothing exciting or memorable, but it was there so he fidgeted with it. Quitting cigarettes had been part of his contract, and part of his deal with Neil Josten, when he'd signed with the professional exy team which meant he was going through withdrawals. These withdrawals didn’t make him throw up, but they were uncomfortable. Andrew was no longer a Fox, but he was a Lion, and that meant he had to make some choices and changes. Some were negotiable, like one weekend a month he was allowed to spend in Columbia with no contact with the team or the media. Some were not negotiable, like creating social media accounts, quitting smoking, and attending press conferences. Which is why Andrew was sitting at the long table in front of a hoard of journalists and cameramen. Coach Miles, captain Alex Rossen, fan favourite Liam Giles and token female Olivia Howard were seated with Andrew at the long table. Andrew was there because he'd been hard fought for and hard won by the Lions; more than one professional team had wanted Andrew Minyard, the best goalie in college class one exy. They'd clearly not expected his apathy, he kept getting sideways looks from the rest of the table as he maintained his silence and fidgeted with his bottle throughout the interview.

"Next question?" Captain Rossen said into his mic. A surge of reporters started shouting questions but simmered down when Coach Miles singled one out. This reporter had been fairly quiet as he took his notes, but it was clear by the expectant look on his face that he had a deal or rapport with the Lions and his questions would be answered one way or another. 

"Damian Heathers from Exy Today," the reporter introduced himself. Andrew didn't like the way Mr Heathers was looking at him. "Andrew Minyard, the newest recruit to the Lions, this is your first year in a professional team, how are you feeling about this big contract?" He looked hungry, and kind of smug. Andrew wanted to punch him. This was also the first time he'd been addressed directly by a reporter. He'd been talked about by the coach and captain as if he wasn’t there; how excited they were to have him, how hard they'd worked, what he would bring to the team, all that fluff for the reporters. Nobody had spoken to him directly, and Andrew hadn't wanted that to change. He considered just not answering the question, but out of the corner of his eye, he saw the public relations manager staring up at the ceiling as if in prayer and Andrew remembered his contract. He remembered Neil's lips against his cheek whispering sleepily that he was proud of Andrew. Andrew sighed quietly and met the reporter's gaze. He didn't feel much of anything, as a general rule, his bone-deep apathy was a coping mechanism or trauma response or whatever Bee called it, but he couldn't exactly say that right here. So how did he feel about being a Lion, being a pro? 

"I'm curious," he said, "to see how being a Lion differs from being a Fox. Maybe I'll finally be challenged." He wondered if he'd unintentionally channelled Neil's reporter-induced snark. He hadn't meant it as a blow to the class one league, not really, more of an attempt to talk up the pro-league, but the reaction of the reporters was instant. He caught snippets of questions, all demanding what he'd meant, who he was talking about, what he was expecting. Some people called out about his first match with the Ravens where he'd been pummelled in goals, but he ignored them.   
Coach Miles called for quiet and asked a journalist to repeat his question, again directed at Andrew. 

"Al Bowing," the reporter introduced himself. "Your brother, Aaron, went to medical school, your cousin Nicky to Germany, so you'll be going head to head with both Kevin Day and Matt Boyd on the court this year alone, what are your thoughts?" He asked. Andrew felt it unnecessary to have brought up Aaron and Nicky or the fact that Andrew was 'alone'. In fact, he didn't like that question at all. He looked at the PR woman again, Fiona something. She had spent the past month doing media training with the new recruits and crying in frustration at Andrew. He'd heard her though, he remembered, and he knew how to respond to questions he didn’t like. God fucking damn, being pro was not worth this effort or energy. 

"I'm not worried about the Tornadoes or the Cougars," Andrew said, referring to Kevin and Matt's professional teams. "I trained against and played with Day and Boyd for years," he reminded them. 

"Besides, he's not alone, he has us," Olivia said breezily from next to Andrew, flashing him a pretty smile. Andrew inclined his head to her in what would pass for agreement. 

"There are high expectations for Neil Josten, will you be trying to recruit him as a Lion next year?" A reporter yelled, loud enough in the split second before mayhem that he got the attention of the team. Andrew knew the question wasn't aimed at him, but he answered anyway, because that question and that name belonged to him no matter what. 

"Who?" He said. The reporter frowned and glanced at his notes as if double checking he had the right name.

"Neil Josten, the captain of the Palmetto State Foxes," he said. Andrew waved his hand dismissively, knowing without a doubt that Neil would be watching.

"Josten has a lot of work to do before he's ready to play in the big leagues. Maybe with me out of the goal, he'll have a chance of scoring at training. Then we'll see about letting him on my team again," he said. His phone, which was face down on the table in front of him, vibrated with a text message. Andrew knew it would be Neil, and he didn’t let the smile form on his face. It vibrated again, which probably meant Kevin. It vibrated a third time, and then a fourth. Yep, definitely Kevin. 

“Neil Josten has potential, it will be interesting to see how he goes this year and see where he ends up,” Coach Miles summarised neatly. Andrew decided not to talk for the rest of the conference, but he was lucky enough that no one called on him again. 

When it was time to go and the team members were herded away, Andrew was near enough cornered by Fiona, the coach, the captain and strangely enough, Olivia.  
Andrew didn’t like being cornered, his back to the wall and the assortment of people spread in front of him in a loose semi-circle, but he didn’t let himself panic. He raised an eyebrow at the four of them and crossed his arms in front of his chest.   
“What the fuck was that?” Alex Rossen demanded.

“What he means is, why did you throw Josten under the bus?” Fiona said gently. Olivia tilted her head, her long brown hair falling over her shoulder. She was taller than Andrew, but she was slight and thin, probably his best bet if he was going to fight his way out of this ambush. 

“What bus?” Andrew replied. 

“You said without you in the goal, he might actually be okay this year,” Miles growled. Andrew nodded slowly. It had been the truth, Neil had never scored on Andrew in their life, now he had a chance in training. 

“I was being honest,” Andrew told them. He didn’t add that he’d been taunting his boyfriend, because that was none of their business. 

“I thought you and Neil were friends,” Olivia broached. She had a small smile on her thickly painted lips, a knowing smile that made Andrew a little suspicious.

“Friends?” Andrew asked, the word feeling foreign in his mouth. He didn’t have friends, plural. He had friend, singular, and that was Renee. He was stuck with Kevin, related to Aaron and Nicky, and tolerated some of the Foxes past and present. Neil had never been his friend. He’d been a problem, a nuisance, a mild inconvenience… then they’d skipped the friend part. Even the few months where they’d had even footing before they kissed, there had been too many feelings and too many extreme events for it to have been purely friendly. Now, well now he may as well be married to the useless striker. Andrew’s own thought process surprised him and he frowned. 

“Judging by that look, you aren’t friends?” Alex prodded. 

“No, we’re not. I hate Neil Josten,” he said. 

“Just, try not to bad mouth him in public too much, okay?” Fiona suggested. Andrew shrugged with one shoulder and that seemed to be enough to break up the team meeting. The only person who hung back was Olivia and she leaned on the wall next to him. 

“You going to check your messages?” She asked. Andrew glanced down at the phone in his hand and then back up at her. She smirked and winked at him. 

“What do you know?” He asked. 

“You might know my cousin, Laila Dermott?” She said. Andrew did, in fact, know Laila Dermott. Her and her girlfriend were on the Cougars team with Matt Boyd, and they’d both played for the Trojans in NCAA class one. Laila and Grace sometimes joined Jeremy Knox when he hung out with Kevin and Neil, and because Neil and Kevin were there, Andrew had been dragged along too. 

“Right, so you know then,” Andrew said. He didn’t really care, he didn’t hide his sexuality or his relationship, he just didn’t share it with people who had no business knowing. 

“I do, Laila mentioned it a couple of years ago. I figured she would have mentioned if you’d broken up,” she explained. Andrew didn’t figure how Olivia could have known that for sure, but he didn’t mention that. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone, it’s not my place. Laila and Grace won’t out you either, they know what it can be like being gay sports stars,” she added. Andrew considered pointing out that Laila Dermott had seemingly already outed him to her, but again decided to let that go without comment. 

“I’m not worried,” he said instead. She smiled again, friendly and warm, and Andrew realised she was trying to establish a friendship. Andrew wasn’t sure it had ever been that easy before, usually people treated him like a bomb that was about to explode or avoided him completely. 

“Check your messages, you might have made him angry and need to do damage control,” she said quietly, brown eyes sparkling with mischief.

“I doubt it,” Andrew said, clicking on the phone. He went into Neil’s messages and his lip twitched in a smile, the familiar contented feeling spreading through his stomach, a feeling he could only associate with Neil. “See, he’s not mad,” he said, turning the screen to show Olivia. He didn’t know why he wanted to, and he knew he’d have to find a way to test her and find if she’s entirely trustworthy, but this felt okay. She read the message and raised an eyebrow at him. 

“That looks angry to me,” she mused. He looked back down at the ‘Fuck you Andrew’ message and shook his head. 

“He’s not,” he promised. “Kevin on the other hand…” he opened Kevin’s messages and shook his head. ‘Why would you say that?’ ‘You’ve ruined his career before it even started!’ “God fucking dammit Andrew!’ He showed Olivia and she laughed. 

“Now do you need to do damage control?” She asked. 

“Probably,” he said. 

“Will you?” She asked. Andrew tapped on the rude finger emoji and pressed send. 

“Nope.” 

“I like you Andrew Minyard,” she decided. Andrew looked at her out of the corner of his eye. “No pressure to like me back or trust me,” she assured him, “but if you have nothing better to do tonight, we could go get a drink?” She offered. Andrew studied her for a long moment before leaning off the wall. 

“You’re buying the first round,” he said. She seemed to think that was fair enough and led the way out of the building.  



	2. "Want Me To Read To You?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *Two weeks after the first chapter*
> 
> Neil Josten post first game of the Class One league!   
> Super freaking soft Andreil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't have a beta reader, please love me!

Neil pulled his helmet off and tossed it in the vague direction of Robin who caught it without much thought, holding her hand out for his gloves as he caught up to her. They’d just won the first game of the class one season and he couldn’t have been prouder of his team, of Robin who had played like her life depended on it. It was such a green, new team of fresh recruits after Kevin, Andrew, Aaron and Nicky’s graduation, but they’d played better than he’d expected. It still hurt though, behind Neil’s ribs and in his stomach. The first game he’d played without them. It hurt more than it had when he’d stepped up as captain and played without Dan, Renee and Allison for the first time. They were meeting at the half court line to celebrate, as they should, but Neil had to bring his gaze back from the home goal where he was used to meeting Andrew at the end of every game.   
“You played well Foxes!” Neil shouted as his team surrounded him. They were as drenched with sweat as he was, smearing down their faces and curling their hair, and they were all taking heaving breaths as they slapped each other on the back, connected sticks and jumped on each other, but they were all grinning through their exhaustion. The subs joined the celebration and Carter Holmes, freshman backliner extraordinaire, jumped on Neil’s back with a loud whoop. 

“Go Foxes!” He yelled. The team yelled it back at him, but Neil waved his hand to settle them down a little as the losing team joined them at the half court line for the post-game politeness. They cheered, slapped sticks, and Neil led his triumphant, elated team to home court. 

“You guys did great for your first game as a new team, and Neil, exceptional last five second goal,” Wymack said as they met with him. Neil waved his hand in dismissal and took the Gatorade Abby offered him. 

“We need to work on our footwork, as a whole, and the offence needs to practice quicker passing,” he said. Wymack shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“Once, just once, would it kill you to celebrate at the end of a game?” He asked. Neil grinned at him and wiped his cheek on the shoulder of his jersey. “Alright, go shower, you all stink! Meet you in the lounge for post-game meeting. Neil, you’re on press duty with whoever you choose,” Wymack dismissed the group. Neil scowled at Wymack, but he felt Robin’s presence at his side, and she smiled at him when he looked over at her. 

“Want a hand?” She offered. Carter took Robin’s and Neil’s helmets and gloves as he passed, juggling them like a professional as he went. 

“Let’s do it,” Neil agreed. Robin walked with him to the Foyer and the waiting crowd of reporters and flashing cameras. He planted himself on the bench and scooted over for Robin to sit down beside him. They started yelling at the two Foxes as soon as they were seated, demanding attention and asking questions. Neil let Robin take control of pointing to the reporters and they took turn answering the questions, and Neil was grateful that none of the questions were too personal or touched on years past. The Foxes were still a mismatch team of people from broken homes, trauma and addiction included, but they hadn’t caused any problems over the summer training sessions so there was nothing for them criticise yet. Neil made the hand motion that suggested they wrap it up and move off, but one reporter jumped to his feet with a wild look on his face, like he had the most important question of the night. Neil was immediately wary, but he nodded his head at the man to proceed.

“I’m Al Bowing,” he said and Neil shrugged that off. “Andrew Minyard, former Foxes Goalkeeper and new recruit for the Chicago Lions, has recently said in an interview that you, Neil Josten, has a lot of work to do before he’d play with you on the same team again, what is your response to that?” The reporter asked. Neil shook his head before he could stop himself. 

“Who?” Neil replied tiredly, copying Andrew’s own response. Robin hid a smile behind her hand so that nobody could use it against her in an article if they got a picture of it. 

“Andrew Miny…” the reporter trailed off because Neil waved his hand again, cutting him off. Apparently, his copycat moment had been misconstrued. 

“It doesn’t matter what Andrew Minyard thinks about my skills on the court, who said I would want to play on his team next year anyway?” Neil said. He saw Wymack massage his temples as he watched, but Neil couldn’t hide his smile and Robin’s eyes were shining with amusement. 

“Minyard said-”

“I don’t care what Andrew said,” Neil cut the reporter off. “All that’s important is that he goes face to face with Kevin this year and I am looking forward to watching Kevin wipe the floor with Andrew and put him back in his place.” He grinned directly at the assembled reporters and their cameras. 

“That will be all,” Robin said, standing up and pulling Neil up by his hand behind her. They walked away from them, both of them trying to hold their laughter until they were out of camera view. They collapsed against a wall, shoulder to shoulder, laughing together. 

“You said that!” Robin cried out. “Andrew is going to kill you!” 

“Nah,” Neil said, holding his stomach. “I think Kevin might for claiming he’s going to kick Andrew’s ass,” he added. 

“Go shower, the pair of you.” Wymack sounded unamused. Neil and Robin broke apart and split to their respective locker rooms. 

An hour after Neil followed Robin and Carter into their dorm, the three of them were seated on beanbags with books in their laps, and Neil’s phone started ringing. Neil reached for it and waved the caller ID at Robin with a smile.   
“Andrew?” She guessed. 

“Hey Drew,” Neil answered the call. 

“Really? Setting Kevin up for failure like that, bitch move Josten,” Andrew said. Neil laughed and climbed from the beanbag, the foam balls rolling loudly. 

“Tell him I say hi!” Robin hissed as he passed her, down the hall into their bedroom. 

“You never know, Kevin may best you,” Neil said. “Robin says hello.”

“Hi,” Andrew said. Neil called that down the hallway before closing the door. “Have you seen Twitter?” Andrew asked. Neil, who had just been about to fall backwards onto his bunk, stumbled and had to catch himself before he smacked his head. 

“Did you just… ask me if I’d seen Twitter?” He demanded. 

“Yes,” Andrew said. Neil laughed and settled down on his mattress, pulling Andrew’s pillow to his chest. Neil hadn’t asked if he could keep the pillow, and Andrew had pretended he hadn’t noticed it hidden in Neil’s bed when he was packing. 

“I don’t have Twitter,” he said. “Do you have Twitter?” 

“I do, I had to get Twitter and Instagram, it’s in my contract,” Andrew explained. Neil pulled the phone from his ear, an updated version of the old flip phone he’d had, so that he could video call Andrew when they were apart. He clicked the phone to speaker and went to the app store, shaking his head. 

“So you download them, and now you use them?” Neil clarified. 

“I am contractually obligated to post one picture and Tweet a week, and spend two hours a week interacting with fans on both platforms,” he said. Neil didn’t bother trying not to grin as he downloaded both apps. 

“Sounds like fun,” he mused. Andrew grunted with indifference. “So what am I missing on Twitter?” Neil asked, creating his account.

“People have decided that we have a long-standing rivalry and resent each other’s existence,” Andrew deadpanned. Neil was surprisingly delighted by this and he nestled down under his blanket. 

“Well you do hate me,” Neil pointed out. Andrew hummed in response and Neil heard him fight with a blanket or pillow in Chicago. 

“That’s what I said,” Andrew agreed, sounding comfortable and settled. “It’s because of the thing I said two weeks ago at the press conference.” 

“Yeah, I gathered as much,” Neil confirmed. Neil heard a voice in the background and paused filling out his new password field. He knew that Andrew had moved in with the only female on the Chicago Lions team the week before, but Neil hadn’t met Olivia yet. Laila, her cousin, sang her praises though, and Neil was quietly relieved that Andrew wouldn’t be living alone. 

“Olivia says hello,” Andrew said into the phone with a sigh, as if passing the message was a physical feat. 

“Hello Olivia,” Neil replied absentmindedly. Finally, he had a Twitter account. His profile picture was a generic picture of the Fox’s team logo of a pawprint, and his banner picture was a team photo that had been taken during the summer training sessions. “What is your Twitter name thing?” Neil asked. 

“Why?”

“Because I now have Twitter and I want to see what you’re talking about,” Neil explained. 

“Following me won’t show you that,” Andrew said. “Just follow Exy update pages, Matt and Kevin. Nicky too, his entire page is retweets about our apparent rivalry.” 

“Okay hold on,” Neil said, typing ‘Exy’ into the search bar. He went and followed a handful of the more popular update pages, and was pleased to find Laila, Grace, Jeremy, Jean, Kevin and Matt’s blue tick approved accounts. He found Andrew’s too and pressed the follow button, which just made Andrew huff in irritation. 

“Why is there a blue tick?” 

“It means verified, that it’s the real person behind the account,” Andrew said. 

“For famous people?” Neil clarified. 

“Sure,” Andrew agreed. Neil felt a little flutter of pride at seeing Andrew’s blue tick. 

“What’s Nicky’s name thing? He didn’t come up when I typed in exy.” 

“Junkie,” Andrew said. “It’s just Nick Hemmick, one word.” Neil found it immediately and followed, surprised that Dan, Renee and Allison came up as recommended pages for him to follow straight after. He followed them too. 

“Wow, people are really convinced we hate each other huh,” Neil mused, scrolling down Nicky’s page. Clearly, he was having a field day, sharing all of the posts from Exy fans about Neil and Andrew. There were pictures of the two of them walking away from each other on the court, Andrew flicking Neil’s turned back the middle finger, Neil pushing Andrew’s shoulder with the butt of his racquet as the team walked out of the Foxhole Court. Moving pictures, GIFs apparently, of their replies at their interviews and perceived reactions at hearing each other’s names. People posting Tweets about how it was so obvious, clearly expected, calling them asocial individuals and socially inept because of their upbringings, so why would anyone expect them to be friends. Neil considered those ones to be rude, but Nicky always had something equally snarky to say in their defence on those particular ones. 

“I do hate you,” Andrew reminded him. 

“I know,” Neil said. One GIF, one of the few with the pair of them off the court and out of uniform, caught Neil’s attention. It was years old, Neil’s second summer as a Fox, and Andrew was shaking his head at Neil with an apathetic look on his face. Neil had an exy ball in his hand and was throwing it up and catching it, glaring back at Andrew. Neil remembered that day. Andrew had been smoking on the trunk of his car, watching Neil mess around with the ball as he waited for Andrew so that they could go inside. They’d just been on a long drive, just the two of them, windows down, and it was the first time Andrew had let Neil put his hand on Andrew’s leg while he drove. Andrew was shaking his head at Neil because Neil had dropped the ball on his toe and cried out, and Neil was glaring because Andrew had just called him ‘Junkie’ as expected. It was a good memory, and Neil smiled at the warmth spreading through his stomach. He saved the image to his phone, wondering how someone had even found it. 

“Why do people care?” Neil asked, clicking the heart on the picture. 

“Because people suck,” Andrew answered. 

“True,” Neil replied. They lapsed into a comfortable silence as Neil scrolled through Twitter feeling concerned by people’s interest in his life. He found Andrew’s profile again and started looking through that with less concern. Andrew mainly just retweeted information from his teammates and the managers, et cetera, with very short updates like ‘Training starts too early’ and ‘They can make me give up smoking, but not ice cream’ accompanied by a picture of a huge tub of mint choc chip. 

“Nice last-minute goal,” Andrew said quietly. Neil’s cheeks went warm and he knew he was blushing a little bit. 

“You watched the game?” He asked. 

“I did,” Andrew said. “Olivia was annoyed because I interrupted her Friends marathon.” 

“Tell her I’m sorry,” Neil said, feeling torn between endeared and uncomfortable. Andrew huffed with an amused laugh. 

“She quit complaining when I pointed you out,” he said. “She said she hadn’t enjoyed watching college exy for years, but she said it was fun.” 

“Well, that’s good…” Neil said, unsure how to take the compliment. “And thanks, for saying it was a good goal.” 

“I’m not Kevin, I wasn’t looking for faults,” Andrew said. Neil smirked. 

“Did you find any faults?” He teased. 

“Yes, but nothing you didn’t already know,” he said. That was probably true, Neil had already spent half the night paying attention to his faults. “Have you heard from Kevin?” 

“He sent me some texts about my, um, comment in post-game press, about you. He seems to think us insinuating we have a rivalry isn’t a smart idea or some shit, I don’t know I tuned him out,” Neil answered. 

“That sounds about right,” Andrew decided. “It has some entertainment value though.” 

“What, Kevin does?” Neil asked, distracted by a notification on his phone. Apparently, Allison had seen Neil had followed her and made a big ‘welcome to Twitter’ announcement. Neil was rapidly gaining followers. He closed the app and put the phone off speaker, holding it to his ear. 

“No, the interpretation of our relationship,” Andrew said, speaking in a tone that suggested to Neil he wasn’t impressed by Neil’s distraction. 

“It’s been four years and I still like when you call us a relationship,” Neil said. “Beats you saying ‘there is no us’ or ‘there is no this’ every other day.” 

“Shut up Josten,” Andrew said. Neil’s stomach ached with how much he wanted Andrew to not be so far away. To be there with him. He pressed his face into Andrew’s pillow for a moment and breathed in deeply. 

“So, the rivalry idea amuses you. Are you saying we exaggerate, make it a thing in press conferences and stuff?” Neil asked. 

“No, but I’m not saying we correct them either,” Andrew said. Neil smiled against the pillow and nodded, even though Andrew couldn’t see him. 

“Okay. We just… be ourselves then.” 

“Try not to start a mob war,” Andrew cautioned. Neil laughed and stretched out, kicking the blankets from his body as the summer night stuck to his skin. 

“I will do my best,” he said. They lapsed into silence again, but this time it felt heavier. This time there were words that they couldn’t or wouldn’t say, but were both thinking. Neil held the phone a little tighter and pressed the heel of his palm into his eye. He missed Andrew so much it ached. He’d spent two weekends with Andrew in Columbia since his graduation, and they’d spent all of the first month after that on a road-trip together, but that didn’t make being apart any easier. Andrew was in Chicago, Neil was in South Carolina, and they would be going weeks without seeing each other. Unbidden, the memory of reuniting with Andrew after his ordeal with his father in Baltimore came to the front of his mind. They’d been banged up and injured, Andrew furious and as frantic as he could be, both firm and gentle with Neil. Everything about that moment, even with their witnesses, had screamed ‘mine, mine, mine!’ Neil hadn’t quite understood it at the time, but as he lay there alone in the bed he’d shared with Andrew the entire year before, his heart squeezed painfully. He wanted Andrew’s hands on him again, and not in a sexual way, but in the firm, claiming, reassuring way.   
“I miss you, Drew,” he whispered. Andrew didn’t make a noise, not even a breath, for a long beat. Neil didn’t expect him to say it back, didn’t really expect him to respond at all, but he let the words hang there for a while, just relieved he’d said them. 

“I know Neil,” Andrew said quietly, his voice as heavy with emotion as it could ever really be. It wasn’t much different to how he normally sounded, but Neil could tell the difference. Just Andrew using his name was symbolic of how sincere he was being. “I miss you too.” 

“What are you up to?” Neil asked after another beat of silence. What he really wanted to say was ‘come home’, but he swallowed the words. 

“I was reading,” Andrew said. Neil would never admit it aloud, but he liked that they’d both been reading before the call. Robin was studious, which meant she didn’t watch a lot of movies or shows or listen to loud music, which Neil liked about her. Carter didn’t like loud noises, same as Neil although for very different reasons, and when he did want to watch or listen to something, he preferred to use headphones. It worked all around and Neil was reading more and more now that he didn’t have the distraction of video games and horror movies every night. He’d forgotten how much he liked it. 

“What were you reading?” Neil asked. Andrew read a lot more than he let on, and he read a wide range of genres that Neil would never even think twice to look at. “Still rereading a Tale of Two Cities?” 

“No, rereading with an eidetic memory cuts off a lot of time,” he said. “I was actually reading a book about autism in adults. Bee thought it might help me understand myself better if I stopped ignoring it.” He didn’t sound enthused by this, but Neil was more than a little surprised he was making the effort at all. It had been maybe a little over a year ago that Andrew had told him he’d been diagnosed with autism when he’d been at the hospital Neil’s freshman year. Neil had done some quiet research on the subject after finding out and saw that it did make sense, he could see the similarities. It hadn’t changed how he felt about Andrew, he didn’t think anything could, but it had helped him understand his boyfriend a little better; unravel some of the mystery. He hoped, at least a little, that it would do the same for Andrew. 

“Is it better than Charles Dickens?” Neil asked. There was a pause, probably as Andrew decided whether to be amused or hang up, and Neil waited with a small smile. 

“No, but at least it’s something new,” Andrew answered. Neil laughed quietly. 

“Hey… can we video call before we hang up?” Neil asked. Andrew groaned as if the idea couldn’t be more annoying, but his phone beeped with an incoming camera request. Neil reached over to turn on his lamp and accepted the request. “Hey.” 

“Hey yourself,” Andrew replied. He was sitting in an armchair Neil had seen in one or two pictures and calls over the past week, his hair out and loose at the neckline of his tank top. He looked pale and sleepy in the dimly lit room, but he looked comfortable and familiar. Neil smiled and hugged Andrew’s pillow tighter. “If you rip my pillow, you’re buying me a new one.” 

“I’ll buy you a pillow anyway, it’s mine now,” Neil told him. Andrew shook his head, looking unimpressed, but the corner of his lip twitched with a smile. 

“Go to sleep Neil,” Andrew huffed. Neil placed his phone on the stand he’d brought specifically so he could video call Andrew without holding his phone and rolled onto his side. 

“Will you stay on the phone?” Neil asked. 

“Until you fall asleep,” Andrew answered. He hesitated, Neil could see him chewing on his lip as he looked at Neil through the phone. “I bought a book yesterday, it’s fantasy fiction or something, you’d probably like it more than I would…” 

“You going to bring it next time you visit?” Neil asked. Andrew shook his head slowly. 

“If you want, I could read it to you?” He offered, Neil’s heart seized, and he blinked at Andrew in shock. The fact that Andrew had offered was incredibly endearing, but the fact that he’d bought a book he knew Neil would like just to fill the silences between wakefulness and sleep on these calls was so thoughtful that Neil didn’t really know what to say. He could see how vulnerable and unsure Andrew felt, he wasn’t even trying to hide it behind apathy or disinterest. 

“Yes,” Neil said quietly. Andrew seemed to visibly relax as he stood from the couch. Neil watched as Andrew went down a hall and into his bedroom, settling down into his own bed with a lamp and his phone stand. He showed Neil the book, one Neil had never heard of, and started to read. Neil watched for two whole chapters. Just watched as Andrew read the pages aloud, no specific enthusiasm or emphasis, but patient and calm.

“You’re staring,” Andrew said, looking up from the pages. Neil wanted to say that he was because he couldn’t quite believe his eyes, because Andrew was so handsome bathed in amber light with his hair out and his bands shucked off. He wanted to say how lucky he felt, how grateful he was, and… well how much he loved Andrew. He didn’t need to say it, Andrew knew, and his blonde boyfriend put his index finger to his lip in a pre-emptive shush.   
“Close your eyes.” 

“Goodnight Drew,” Neil said, doing as he was told. Andrew didn’t respond, just picked up from where he’d stopped reading, and Neil let himself fall asleep.


	3. "You're Shorter Than I Am."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew goes to a Fox game at PSU and Neil snarks at the media again, putting Andrew in Twitter's trending.  
> Also just fun and soft Andreil, which is the premise of this fic tbh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because of all of the support and love from all of you over the past 24 hours I wanted to upload again!  
> I hope you like it <3  
> Not beta read as per usual, please be nice!
> 
> And thank you all so much for being so kind and supportive of this fic <3

Andrew stayed out of sight of the audience of Fox fans and the cameras in the stands as the Foxes and the Jackals played their vicious game. Andrew had arrived only a couple of minutes ago, driving since seven that morning to get there ten minutes before half time. It was the one weekend of the month that Andrew was allowed to not be at training and go back home, as per his contract. He knew it would be harder when the professional leagues started playing their games, but he had a few more months of flexibility while the college league played and the pros trained. The fact that the two leagues didn’t start and finish at the same time had bothered Andrew up until he’d graduated, but now he could appreciate that the there was a segregation for both the fans and the players.  
Andrew watched as Neil was treated for a shoulder injury by Abby, but it mustn’t have been too bad because he didn’t even wince as she pressed around the injury. It had taken a lot of Andrew’s self-control not to rush over to Neil when he’d been pulled off, or storm the court and swing at the defender who had slammed Neil into the plexiglass wall. Andrew’s phone buzzing in his pocket was Andrew’s excuse for a distraction and he pulled it out. The unofficial Exy Pros updates page on Twitter, that Andrew had decided was run by exy fangirls convinced they had a chance at dating players, had made an update and tagged Andrew in it. Andrew opened the tweet and was faced with a picture from his team’s earlier open training session with the caption ‘Where’s @aminyard03? #number3 #AndrewMinyard #ChicagoLions #MissingMinyard’. Andrew hadn’t really spent any time on Twitter or Instagram that week, which was technically a breach of his contract, so he figured there was no time like the present to save his skin until he knew what boundaries he could push. He snapped a picture of the fox pawprint under his feet and posted it to both Instagram and Twitter accounts with a very simple caption: Home for the weekend #FoxholeCourt. He hoped Fiona approved, although he didn’t see why the PR manager wouldn’t, she’d tried her very best to drill it into Andrew that the fans liked it when he showed any kind of feeling or attachment to something. What was more ‘feeling or attachment’ than home?  
Immediately, Andrew’s phone started blowing up with notifications. Some were of concerned fans wanting to make sure Andrew was safe and that his family was okay, assuming his return to South Carolina was because of a family emergency. There were a handful of comments calling Andrew a traitor, some people tagging past Foxes like Matt, Kevin and Renee and asking if they were there as well, and a consistent stream of likes and simple emoji related replies. One reply on Twitter caught Andrew’s attention. ‘Say hi to your BFF @josten10 from me xo’ it said. Andrew found the palpable sarcasm amusing and lifted his phone, camera open at Neil. He waved it around until he caught Neil’s attention and the sweaty red head rolled his eyes and predictably held his middle finger up in the direction of the camera as Abby strapped his shoulder. Andrew snapped the picture and attached it to his reply to the Tweet. ‘Until the idiot learns how not to get caught between a glass wall and someone twice his size, I won’t waste my time.’  
The half-time buzzer sounded and Abby let Neil get to his feet and get his armour and jersey back on. Andrew waited off to the side and Neil came over to him, grinning happily and slick with sweat. Andrew wanted to grab onto him, drag him to backseat of the Maserati and be incredibly inappropriate. He had missed that grin, those bright blue eyes, the bounce in his step when he was excited. Andrew had missed Neil, undeniably so. 

“Hey handsome,” Neil said. Andrew had nearly died the first time Neil had called him that, which meant he’d walked away from Neil and not spoken to him for three hours. He’d gotten used to the term of endearment, even welcomed it, but after a month of not hearing it in person, Andrew had to resist the urge to walk away and deal with it all over again. 

“Are you okay?” Andrew asked, nodding at Neil’s shoulder. 

“I’m fine,” Neil said. Andrew’s lips thinned and he held his hand out to slap him. Neil didn’t move out of Andrew’s reach, instead he smiled and took Andrew’s hand in his own, pulling him closer. Andrew let him. “Seriously, I’m fine. I can play next half,” he promised. Neil was sticky and waves of heat were rolling off him, his hair damp and cheeks splotchy and red, but Andrew didn’t pull away. 

“Yes or no?” Andrew murmured. They hadn’t used ‘yes or no’ for simple things like kissing in a while, but every time Andrew saw Neil again after time apart, he asked again, just to make sure that it was still yes, that they were still okay. Neil’s response was to close the distance between their mouths and kiss him firmly. Andrew curled his fingers in Neil’s jersey and kissed him back just as hard. 

“Always a yes,” Neil said, breaking away too soon. 

“Don’t always me,” Andrew grumbled. Neil kissed his cheek quickly and backed out of Andrew’s space. 

“I better go listen to Wymack and tell everyone I haven’t gotten myself knocked out of the season at our third game,” he said, tapping his shoulder. 

“Junkie!” Andrew called after him as Neil strode away, back to the home benches where the team was guzzling Gatorade and listening to Wymack’s notes. Andrew went deeper into the changerooms and settled down on one of the couches, flicking the TV on to watch the game on the screen. It beat being out there where the media could snap pictures of him, and he knew he would have less visceral reactions to Neil getting knocked around if he wasn’t close enough to storm the court himself. 

The Foxes won, but it was a close game. The Jackals had an even newer line-up than the Foxes did, which had ultimately been their downfall. While the team split into their locker rooms for showers, Andrew went and hovered out of sight, but within hearing distance of the press. Neil and the leggy brunette who had taken over as defence for Nicky or Aaron were on press duty. Andrew was pretty sure the kid’s name was Carter, but he wasn’t sure he’d paid enough attention when they’d been introduced. Either way, both Robin and Neil liked him, and Andrew had learnt to trust their instincts. Mostly Robin’s, he still wasn’t convinced Neil wouldn’t stop, drop and roll himself into danger if he could find it. He had to remind himself that Neil was twenty-two now, Andrew himself closer to twenty-four than he liked to think about. They’d stayed out of trouble for years, it should be okay now. 

“Neil Josten!” A reporter yelled before Neil could wrap up the interviews. Andrew recognised the voice, a nosy reporter from some online Exy publication. “Did you see what Andrew Minyard was saying about you on Twitter tonight?” The reporter asked. Andrew frowned, pulling his phone out of his pocket to look at the blank screen. 

“I got off the court and sat down here, when would I have looked at Twitter?” Neil replied snidely. Andrew smiled.

“What’s he said?” Robin asked, taking Andrew by surprise, not that he let that register on his face. “You only smile like that when he’s fucked off some reporters.” 

“We’re about to find out,” he said, tilting his head to listen to the rest of the interview. 

“Minyard called you an idiot, said he wouldn’t waste his breath saying hi to you until you stop getting picked on by people twice your size,” the reporter explained. Andrew pulled the Tweet up on his phone to show Robin his exact wording and she rolled her eyes with an amused smile on her lips. Neil sighed into the microphone. 

“Can someone remind Andrew Minyard that he’s shorter than I am?” He said. Andrew wiped the smile off his face and rolled his eyes. Robin muffled her laugh into her hand, her shoulder-length dark hair falling forward and hiding half her face. 

“Do you know why Minyard is in town this weekend?” A new voice asked. There was a pause, probably while Neil decided how to answer. 

“I’m sure I have no idea,” Neil answered, voice dripping with sarcasm. “That’ll be all,” he added. There was a clamour as the reporters tried to get more attention, but Neil and Carter didn’t answer them and soon enough the duo came into view. 

“Hey Andrew!” Carter said excitedly. Andrew nodded his head once in the teenager’s direction before Robin was linking her arm with Carter and leading him away. 

“A short idiot hm?” Neil asked, voice teasing. “Is that what you think of me?” He continued, putting his face close to Andrew’s and stepping in his space. He was clearly pretending to initiate a fight, but his smile was too big to be serious and the minute Andrew put his hand up flat against Neil’s chest he stopped moving. 

“You are a short idiot,” Andrew told him. Neil laughed and put his hand over Andrew’s where it rested on his jersey and armour. 

“You are a shorter idiot,” he replied. 

“Go shower, you stink,” Andrew told him. 

“Kiss first, I have a month of them to catch up on,” Neil said. Andrew rolled his eyes at the petulance, but his heart felt a little like it was being filled with helium as he let Neil- armour and all- crowd him up against the wall and kiss him deeply. They really did have a month’s worth of attention to catch up on. 

After everyone had showered and Wymack debriefed his team- Andrew seated with Neil unashamedly perched on his legs- the team was dismissed and they left in a group. Andrew, Neil, Robin and Carter walked behind Wymack and Abby out of the stadium to the carpark, but halfway to the cars, Robin stopped to adjust her shoe, using Neil as a support for balance. Carter waited with them, but Andrew kept walking with Wymack and Abby to Wymack’s car. Andrew saw a couple reporters sneaking around trying to take pictures so he kept his back turned, facing the couple in front of him.  
“Are you staying here tonight? You look too shattered to drive to Columbia safely,” Abby asked as gently as she could. Andrew rolled his eyes and shot a withering look in Neil’s direction, more to prove a point than because he was actually annoyed. 

“Neil said the same,” he said. “We’ll stay here tonight.” 

“In the dorm?” Wymack asked, voice gruff, but surprised. Andrew shook his head. Neil stayed on campus with Robin and Carter most nights, as was required for athletes, but he didn’t need to, not really. Abby and Wymack had finally bought a house and moved in together two summers ago and they had a spare bedroom downstairs for wayward (or just visiting) Foxes and other strays (Andrew remembered how pitiful Jean Moreau had looked in Abby’s spare room four years ago). Abby and Wymack’s room was downstairs too, but upstairs across the hall from each other were too often empty bedrooms. One was Kevin’s, one was Neil’s. Abby and Wymack had wanted to give the two of them their own space, a home to return to and a family that wouldn’t turn their back on them. Neil had joined as a freshman with nowhere safe to go, and now he had two sets of house keys to places he could call home.  
What had completely thrown Andrew for a loop was when Abby and Wymack had quietly given Andrew a set of keys to the house too. Abby had told him that she knew Neil would always let his room be open to Andrew should he need somewhere to stay, and Wymack had just said he knew Andrew would break in if he didn’t have the key. Andrew hadn’t said anything, but the keys to the house stayed next to the keys to the Foxhole Court on his keyring. Wymack hadn’t asked for either sets of keys back, and Andrew didn’t want to give them back unprompted. 

“We’ll see you at home then,” Abby said kindly. Andrew watched them climb into their car and when they drove away, he walked to his Maserati where Robin, Carter and Neil were waiting. 

“Everything all good?” Robin asked. Andrew nodded his head and swung his keys around his finger. “Are you coming back to the dorm?” 

“Nah, we’ll go to Wymack’s tonight,” Neil said. “I’ll stop by in the morning to get my stuff for Columbia before we head off tomorrow.” 

“See you tomorrow Captain!” Carter said with a grin and a salute. Neil shook his head, but he saluted back. “Can I have a ride back?” Carter asked Robin.

“Obviously,” she said. “See you tomorrow guys,” she added. 

“Bye,” Andrew said. 

“Tomorrow,” Neil agreed, giving her a hug. “Don’t let Carter set the dorm on fire.” Robin laughed as she walked away.

“Is he a pyromaniac?” Andrew asked. Neil shook his head.

“No, just easily distracted,” Neil answered. Andrew decided that was fair enough. 

“You’re driving,” Andrew said. He was tireder than he’d admit to anyone and he didn’t much feel like putting their lives at risk, even if it was a short drive. Neil at least would be hopped on adrenaline from the game for a little while longer before he crashed. 

“Sure,” Neil agreed, putting his hand on the driver’s side door. He turned a sly grin on Andrew that set flames alight inside Andrew’s stomach. He raised an eyebrow at his boyfriend. 

“Don’t be too tired though, you have a month’s worth of kisses to give me first,” he reminded Andrew. 

“Get in the car,” Andrew said, rolling his eyes. Neil laughed and climbed behind the wheel. Andrew went around to the passenger’s seat and sat down, unfamiliar on the wrong side of his car, but he trusted Neil so he settled back and clicked on the seatbelt. 

After two rounds of ‘catching up’, Andrew was exhausted down to his bones. He lay on his back with the crook of his elbows covering his eyes, sweaty, blissed out, and trying to catch his breath. Adrenaline and energy fuelled Neil and he was laughing breathlessly at Andrew’s state of existence, his fingers splayed out on Andrew’s stomach as he caught his own breathe.  
“Quit laughing,” Andrew growled. Neil laughed again anyway and Andrew peeked out from behind his elbow to see him stretch out his sore shoulder and sigh contentedly. 

“Did you really call me a short idiot?” Neil asked, his hands falling to his lap. Andrew covered his eyes again. 

“See for yourself,” he said. “And throw me some pants.” He felt the bed dip and heard Neil move around the room before a pair of soft sweatpants landed on his stomach. Andrew pulled them on, unsurprised that they were Neil’s and too long in the leg. He didn’t bother trying to roll them up or cuff them, just let them hang past his feet as he lay back down. He watched Neil jump into a pair of bright orange shorts and find his phone in his discarded sport’s bag before the slim man slithered back onto the bed and nestled into Andrew’s side. He hooked his leg over Andrew’s hips and rested his head on his shoulder, his cold phone resting on Andrew’s chest. Andrew curled his arm around Neil’s bare back and held him closer, dropping a kiss to the top of Neil’s head. 

“You did call me an idiot!” Neil said. Andrew smiled, hiding it in Neil’s auburn curls. “Fucking rude,” he grumbled. Andrew kissed the top of his head again and pulled back to meet Neil’s eyes. 

“It was true,” he said. Neil smiled and shook his head, which was no easy feat with his chin still resting on Andrew’s shoulder. 

“Is your shoulder alright?” Andrew asked quietly. With the room lit only by fairy lights Neil and Allison had strung around the frame of his bed, and with Neil pressed so close, it was easy for Andrew to talk, even if it was quietly. Neil hummed thoughtfully and dropped a kiss to Andrew’s shoulder before responding, 

“It hurts a bit, but it should be okay if I rest it this weekend,” he said. 

“Then rest it,” Andrew said. Neil mumbled something incoherently and put his head back down to look at his phone. Andrew trailed his fingers up and down Neil’s side and covered his eyes with the crook of his elbow again, letting himself sink into the comfort and safety of having Neil in his arms again. His own scars were rough against his cheek, the shared heat of their blissed-out bodies against each other, the dimness of the room, it was familiar and it was home. Andrew was ready to fall asleep, but Neil seemed to have different ideas. 

“There’s more!” He said. 

“Huh?” Andrew grunted. He uncovered his eyes and nearly went cross eyed at Neil’s phone held in front of his face. The Tweet was too blurry for Andrew to see so he pushed the phone further back and fumbled for the bedside table and his glasses. He wore contacts mostly, but at night with Neil, he didn’t really mind. They were thin, dark blue wire frames, nothing exciting, but he did take care of them. He slid them onto his face and peered back at the screen where a picture of Andrew scowling in the direction of Neil and Robin while she fixed her shoe was front and centre. Andrew realised it was a picture from that night, after the game. The caption just said ‘Hey @aminyard03 what did @josten10 do now? #ChicagoLions #PSUFoxes’.

“How did they get this picture, but not a picture of us getting into the same car?” Neil asked, taking the phone back when Andrew looked at him. 

“I don’t know,” Andrew said, attempting to shrug, not that he could with Neil on his arm. “Aren’t you going to ask what I was scowling at you for?” Andrew asked. Neil looked genuinely surprised and pushed himself up, so he was half lying on Andrew again, their faces inches apart. Andrew raised his eyebrow and put his hands on Neil’s waist. “Can I help you?” 

“I don’t need to ask what you were scowling at me for, because that, Mr. Minyard, is not a real scowl,” Neil said, waving the phone around. He put it down on the bed beside them, splayed one hand over Andrew’s heart and leant on the palm of his other hand, looking down at Andrew with an openness and vulnerability that always made Andrew’s heart race. That was probably why Neil had his hand there, to feel it. Neil had started doing that within a year of their first kiss. He knew it was a way to see past Andrew’s defences, his apathy and the words he won’t say. He could feel how Andrew reacted to things, and Neil liked it. Andrew let him, mostly, because it was easier than trying to explain. 

“It was a real scowl,” Andrew told him. Neil shook his head, his red curls falling into his eyes and tangling with his lashes. 

“You are so in control of your emotions and expressions that any you display in a public setting like that, it’s for show, it’s to prove a point or make your intention known without needing to say it. I didn’t do anything wrong,” he said. Andrew’s heart was racing again, and judging by the small smile on Neil’s mouth, he could tell. “I know you, Drew.” The thing was, Neil did know Andrew. He knew as much as Andrew could say, as much as he could show, and Neil understood. He paid attention, he remembered, and he held onto everything he learnt like a dragon with treasure. Nobody had ever so effortlessly understood Andrew, or even wanted to. Being known as well as Neil knew him was equal parts terrifying and thrilling. Paired with that look on Neil’s face, the one that would have throbbing hearts in his eyes if he was a cartoon, was nearly too much for Andrew to cope with. He covered his eyes in the crook of his elbow trying not to dislodge his glasses and took a long, deep breath. Neil waited patiently, not moving away, but not moving closer either. 

“Two hundred and three percent,” Andrew grumbled. Neil laughed and Andrew lowered his arm to look back at him, a small smile of his own on his face. 

“I would expect nothing less,” Neil agreed. Andrew sucked his bottom lip into his mouth as he looked up into Neil’s face, putting his hand on the rough scars on his cheek. His pinkie along his jaw, his ring finger touching behind his ear, his thumb at the corner of his mouth. Andrew loved him so much, but it didn’t hurt anymore. He had gotten used to the feeling of loving someone as much as he loved Neil, and even though they’d never said it in words, he had gotten used to being loved in return. Andrew ran his thumb over Neil’s lips and let go of his own from between his teeth. Neil’s eyes fluttered closed and he leaned into the touch with a soft sigh. 

“Pretty boy,” Andrew murmured. Neil smiled and his cheeks went pink under his touch. Andrew kissed him softly before letting go and picking up Neil’s phone from the sheet at his side. “Here, you were in the middle of something,” he said. Neil settled back down on his side against Andrew, taking the phone to supervise the interpreted war, and Andrew took off his glasses to sleep. 

“What’s ‘ship’?” Neil asked. Andrew stifled a groan and squeezed his eyes shut tight behind his arm. 

“In what context?” 

“People are saying they ‘ship’ me and Robin because of the picture of us?” Neil said, sounding confused. Andrew huffed a laugh, at the confusion and the concept of people shipping Robin and Neil together. He couldn’t grudge Neil for not knowing, he’d asked Olivia the same thing after a handful of pictures of the two of them had circled social media with the same kind of messaging. 

“It means people think you’re dating or want you to be dating. Like, relationship,” Andrew explained. He felt Neil recoil as if the idea was repulsive. 

“That’s so weird, what the fuck? Robin’s my best friend…” Neil said. 

“Mhm,” Andrew agreed. “People think Olivia and I are dating. They call us Howyard, which is a terrible ship name.” 

“It looks like Robin and I have been Christened ‘Crossten’ which is perhaps better,” Neil decided. “I wonder why people don’t ship us with Renee and Allison.” 

“Because they’re engaged,” Andrew reminded him. “To each other.” 

“That’s a good point,” Neil mused. He seemed to let the subject drop and Andrew, once again readied himself to sleep. “What is the trending thing?” 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Andrew asked. “You’ve had Twitter for three weeks, you could have asked literally any of these questions to someone else.” 

“Well, this is the first time you have been mentioned in the trending section, so I didn’t care until now…” Neil said. Andrew’s stomach clenched and he uncovered his eyes to glare at him. 

“I’m what?” He asked. Neil shrugged. 

“What is it?” 

“It means that the hashtag has been used enough times that it’s trending on the app,” Andrew explained. Neil looked back at his phone with wide eyes. 

“Oh shit,” he said, before bursting out in laughter. Andrew snatched up his glasses and the phone, looking at the trending column. ‘#RemindAndrewMinyard’ was third trending and when he clicked the tag to see the posts he groaned and dropped the phone onto the bed. Neil picked it up and his stifled giggles spilled into more unbidden laughter. 

“You absolute asshole,” Andrew grumbled. Under the tag was a myriad of GIFs of Neil saying ‘Can someone remind Andrew Minyard that he is shorter than I am?’ and thousands of Tweets just saying ‘@aminyard03 you’re shorter than @josten10!’ or something along those lines. His first time trending since the announcement that he’d joined the Lions and it was because his boyfriend had snarked at the media. Figures. 

“No wonder people think we hate each other,” Neil giggled. Andrew very seriously considered pushing him backwards off the bed. 

“Can we now go the fuck to sleep?” He asked instead. Neil nodded, plugging the phone on to charge (miraculously) and taking Andrew’s glasses to put on the table. He switched the fairy lights off and burrowed down in Andrew’s arms, his head on his chest. Andrew took a deep breath, closed his eyes and pressed his lips to Neil’s forehead. 

“Goodnight Drew,” Neil whispered. 

“Goodnight Neil,” he replied. There was a drawn out pause, but Andrew could feel that Neil wanted to say something else. He waited. And waited. And just as he was about to completely relax, Neil opened his mouth. 

“Hey Andrew?” 

“What?” 

“You’re shorter than I am,” Neil said, shoulders shaking with laughter. Andrew groaned dramatically and rolled over, his back to Neil. Andrew may or may not have been smiling a little bit, and when Neil pressed his front to Andrew’s back and wrapped his arm around his waist, Andrew may have finally been able to sleep.


	4. "This Is Getting Ridiculous."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil doesn't understand why their lives are so interesting.   
> Kevin and Neil being bros.   
> Neil may be getting a little ahead of himself trying to plan a surprise party for Andrew...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **PLEASE READ**  
> I am updating now for two reasons:  
> 1\. It is a super, super, itty bitty short update and I would feel like a jerk if I updated just with this on Sunday, so you can have it now as a treat :') 
> 
> 2\. I have a question for you all! So far, I have written this to be as canon compliant as I can (picking and choosing from Nora's extra content yes, but as real to the actual books as possible), but I have an idea! I would like to give Andrew and Neil TikTok because it would be fun for later in the 'rivalry' and also because Andrew being an instigator on TikTok would be a lot of fun. However! TikTok is a newer app, at least it's only become popular in the last few years and AFTG is set like a million years ago (2000s I believe?) which means it would be varying from canon and I'd be bringing it forward to a modern time. If you guys would like that, let me know in the comments below!   
> (They won't be getting it until chapter like 25 though, so don't get too excited!) 
> 
> In good news, I have written 22 chapters (69k words) so you have a lot to look forward to!

“This is getting out of control,” Neil said into the phone. It was November first, a few months after #RemindAndrewMinyard trended on Twitter, but that didn’t mean the perceived feud had ended online. People had been pulling up pictures posted to previous Fox’s social media pages where Andrew and Neil were stood side by side or near each other and started theorising about their supposed fallout. It ranged from them fighting over Robin to Neil being disgruntled by Andrew choosing the Lions. Some were so preposterous that Neil laughed aloud when he read them, but he was getting tired of his old team member’s getting harassed for information and their pictures taken to dissect. He was grateful that everyone the media approached refused to give up any information, saying that Andrew and Neil’s business was their own, but he kind of wished someone would just say that it wasn’t true just for it to stop. Nicky, who Neil would have expected to spill the secret, was their biggest supporter and claimed that he wouldn’t out anyone without permission. He was also the biggest culprit at whipping the fans into a frenzy by liking or retweeting a post, which often meant the fans took it to be true. Nicky would be laughing at them, amused at the lies and slander knowing how far from the truth it was, but the fans decided that everything Nicky did was gospel. 

“Do you want me to put them straight at the next conference?” Andrew asked. Neil slowed from his run to a jog so he could talk properly. 

“No, you don’t have to, but clearly ignoring questions about us hasn’t helped anything,” Neil said. That had been their game plan since the morning after the trending tag; they would ignore it until it went away. They didn’t engage in any posts, they ignored questions about each other, they didn’t interact online. It apparently just fuelled their beliefs that Andrew and Neil hated each other, and when they didn’t give anything up, they went and found it themselves. “It was easier when we were egging them on. At least then we were in control of the story,” Neil mused. 

“So, we go back to how it was, with you being snide to the media and me being brutally honest?” Andrew asked. Neil slowed to a walk and took in a deep breath, stretching to expand his lungs. 

“I guess so, at least then we won’t be hiding or avoiding anything,” Neil said. “They can interpret it however they want, but we won’t be ignoring it anymore.” 

“Alright, can do,” Andrew agreed. “Are you alright?” 

“What?” Neil asked. “Oh right, yeah fine, just been running.” 

“You rang me on your run?” Andrew sounded incredulous. 

“Yeah? I have to study so this seemed like the only way you wouldn’t distract me for too long,” Neil explained. 

“You’re ridiculous,” Andrew said. Neil laughed and stepped back into a jog. 

“Probably, but I’m your problem so…” he trailed off, grinning. 

“That you are,” Andrew said. “See you tomorrow?” 

“Yep!” Neil chirped. “Kevin and I will leave at ten.”

“Aaron and Katelyn will be there at one,” Andrew said. 

“Awesome, I’ll see you then!” Neil said, bubbles of excitement in his stomach. It had taken some convincing to get Kevin and Aaron to take a couple days off and go to Columbia to celebrate the twins’ birthday. It had been even harder to convince Andrew, not to take time off because that was easy, but just to go and celebrate. Katelyn was coming, for Aaron, and that had made it even harder to convince Andrew. Neil had managed, but only just, and that was without telling him about the party in an attempt to make it a surprise. Neil was grateful that the Foxes didn’t have a game tomorrow because of the odd number of teams in the league that year. The Foxes were pretty much a shoe in for the knockout rounds, but Neil wouldn’t have wanted to miss a game and put his team at any disadvantage. At least the professional leagues didn’t start their games until February, just after the NCAA class one season ended, so Kevin and Andrew wouldn’t be missing out on games either. 

“See you tomorrow Junkie,” Andrew said. Neil said goodbye and the line went dead just as he reached the front yard of Wymack and Abby’s place. Kevin was sitting on the steps, apparently having watched Neil jog up the street. 

“Salut frère,” Kevin said, getting to his feet. Neil grinned and ran up the stairs to throw his arms around him. He was used to Kevin calling him brother, but it was still a good feeling.

“Kevin!” He yelled. Kevin caught him in a hug and laughed, setting him down on the steps. 

“Good run?” He asked. 

“Yeah, it was fine, I rang Andrew,” he answered. 

“How is he?” 

“Good! I think he is starting to look forward to the weekend, or at the very least isn’t hating the idea anymore,” he said. Kevin shook his head, but it was good natured, perhaps even fond. They both knew Andrew was only warming up to the idea of a very small celebration with Aaron, Kevin, Neil and Katelyn. The fact that there was an entire party he didn't know about was, well, going to be momentarily interesting. Neil was ready to chase him down the stairs if he walked off, but he'd cross that bridge if it came to it. 

“Sounds about right,” he said. “Why are you here anyway?” 

“I was going to ask Wymack for a ride to training,” Neil admitted. “I didn’t want to run all the way back to the dorm and then train.”

“Dad’s already gone to the court, but I’ll take you. Abby already gave me her keys for tomorrow when she picked me up from the airport,” Kevin said. 

“Oh cool, thanks,” Neil said before peering dubiously up at Kevin. “Are you going to assistant coach?” 

“Nah,” Kevin said with a laugh. “I’m gonna train with you.” 

"Of course you are," Neil said with a sigh. Kevin's grin was wicked and Neil knew he was about to have a co-captain for a night, one that was much louder and much more condescending than he was. "We're going to be like a violent version of good cop, bad cop," he said, following Kevin into the house. 

"Absolutely," Kevin agreed. Neil started up the stairs for his room before pausing and looking down at where Kevin was closing the front door. 

"What the hell were you doing on the porch?" He asked. Kevin's smile was unusually shy when he turned back around and looked up. 

"Just... being home?" He said. "I don't know how to explain it," he admitted. Neil didn't need him too, he knew what that felt like and he smiled down at him. 

"Welcome back," he said before turning back to change out for training.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it's so short, but the next few chapters are pretty cool so I hope you're excited!


	5. "I Am So Fucked."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The monsters (minus Nicky and adding Katelyn) arrive at the Columbia house for pre birthday party celebrating.  
> Andrew knows about the surprise party.   
> Neil is in trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo, so like, this ends kind of sexy yk? Nothing overly explicit, but this fic is rated M for a reason. 
> 
> Anyway, I don't have a beta reader so please be nice!
> 
> I have also chosen to veto the posting schedule because I have written 26 chapters (80k words) for this fic with no intention of stopping until all 40 chapters are complete, so I'll just post as I feel like it! Enjoy the ride I guess.

The next morning Kevin and Neil went for a run together like old times, just to get their legs moving before they sat in a car for a couple of hours, knowing at least burning some physical energy would help them not annoy the shit out of each other on the drive alone to Columbia.   
“So why isn’t Robin coming?” Kevin asked as they piled their belongings into the car, both freshly showered and changed out of their running gear. Neil shrugged at him, stowing his duffel on the backseat. 

“She will come to the party tomorrow, but she didn’t want to come tonight. Said something about ruining the sexual tension with her girlie presence,” Neil replied. 

“Did you tell her Katelyn was coming?” Kevin asked. Neil smirked at him and nodded his head. 

“Even better though, I reminded her you were going to be there, so we already had a girlie presence,” he teased. Kevin smacked him on the back of the head in response, which Neil supposed was fair. 

“Get in asshole, I’m driving,” Kevin said. Neil climbed into the passenger seat and buckled up as Kevin started the engine.   
It was about fifteen minutes into the drive, neither of them talking much and just listening to the quiet radio with the windows down, before Kevin said something of substance.   
“I’m looking forward to just letting go tomorrow night.”

“What, you don’t party it up in San Diego?” Neil said. 

“Well not really, you have to keep up the image, right? Can’t get caught being a party boy or anything,” Kevin explained. Neil frowned at him, wondering why tomorrow night was going to be different.

“But the image at Eden’s is different?” Neil asked. 

“Well no,” Kevin allowed. “But we’ve got the entire upstairs to ourselves and all of the staff have signed non-disclosure agreements sent out by the Lions and the Cougars so Andrew and I can kind of do what we want.” 

“Oh cool,” Neil said, not that he really understood what that meant. “Do the guests have to sign them too?” 

“Katelyn and Aaron’s friends have signed theirs, but Matt and Dan and Robin and stuff don’t have to because we know them, I guess.” 

“Good, so I don’t need to sign one,” Neil said, feeling a moment of relief and unscrewing the lid off a drink bottle. Kevin laughed and shrugged with one shoulder, changing lanes. 

“It would be no different to the one you already signed for the Lions,” he said. Neil nearly choked on his mouthful of water. 

“What do you mean? I haven’t signed an NDA.” 

“Yeah, you would have signed one because your Andrew’s boyfriend,” Kevin said, speaking in a tone that suggested he thought Neil was being particularly stupid. Neil shook his head at him, eyes wide. 

“Kevin, I’m telling you, I haven’t signed anything for the Lions or for Andrew,” he said. 

“You would have had to, when Andrew told management he had a boyfriend they would have clamped down on that shit so hard. I told you it’s easier to be straight,” Kevin said. Neil just stared at him with his eyebrows raised, waiting for the shoe to drop. It took a long moment of Kevin stealing looks out of the corner of his eye while trying to drive, but eventually his mouth dropped open and his shoulders sagged. “He didn’t tell them he has a boyfriend.” 

“I can’t believe you would have assumed otherwise,” Neil admitted. “We don’t exactly broadcast it.” 

“I thought the Lions were keeping a lid on your relationship, that was why you were both letting the rumours fly online that you hated each other. Why haven’t you just told the truth and put an end to it then?” Kevin asked. 

“It’s none of their business. It’s no one’s business except our own,” he said. 

“At least tell everyone that you are friends at least, these rumours could reflect badly on you when they’re recruiting next year!” Kevin said. This was news to Neil. 

“How so?” 

“No one is going to want someone snarky and dramatic on their team,” Kevin said mildly. Neil laughed loudly at that and relaxed into his seat. “I’m serious Neil.” 

“Oh Kevin,” Neil said placatingly. “Everyone already knows about my attitude problem, and nobody has a more dramatic story than mine. The rumours that Andrew and I have issues is a piece of cake compared to literally anything else. Besides, don’t they say ‘all publicity is good publicity’ or something?” 

“I guess we’ll see then,” Kevin griped. Neil nodded his head, satisfied with that outcome. 

“That we will, now drive quicker, you know Andrew hates it when people are late,” Neil said. Kevin grouched about the speed limit and being following road rules, and said something about how it was bad enough that he was driving a pale blue sedan in public, but Neil tuned him out. 

When they pulled up at Columbia Metropolitan Airport, Andrew was already waiting in the pickup area of the parking lot, his bag at his feet. He had on a dark blue coat that was maybe suited more for Chicago’s fall than South Carolina’s, and his jeans were black and ripped. He was a little paler than usual and when he climbed into the backseat and took the hand Neil offered over the centre console, his fingers were shaking.   
“Hey handsome,” Neil said, turning around to look at him sitting behind Neil’s seat. “You okay?” 

“Fine, just…” Andrew put his head back and closed his eyes, squeezing Neil’s fingers tighter. “Glad to be back on the ground.” He sounded exhausted, like all of his emotional energy had been used just by the two-hour flight. Kevin climbed back into the car after hauling Andrew’s bag into the trunk, but neither Neil nor Andrew let go of each other’s hand. 

“You look terrible,” Kevin noted. Andrew held up his middle finger and kept his eyes closed. Kevin laughed and turned the car on, driving responsibly out of the carpark and taking them towards the Columbia house. 

They had an hour or so to settle in before Aaron and Katelyn arrived, Andrew was sitting on the ground between Neil’s legs with his back to the couch when the front door opened. Andrew froze, probably preparing to be in the same room with Katelyn. Andrew and Aaron’s relationship was a lot better than when Neil had met them, but his boyfriend still had a weird attitude towards Katelyn that he hadn’t really tried to fix. He could tolerate her, for Aaron, and he had no murderous impulses, but he didn’t like her, and he didn’t try to.   
“You good?” Neil asked, bending down to kiss the top of Andrew’s head. 

“I think so,” Andrew decided. He got to his feet and turned to look down at Neil before bending to kiss him firmly. They’d probably kissed about fifty times in the past hour, as they always did on the first night of reuniting. They’d even been relatively tame, staying in the lounge room with Kevin instead of locking the bedroom door behind them. 

“Pay up!” Kevin yelled, startling them apart. Aaron grumbled something and slapped money into Kevin’s outstretched hand. Katelyn smiled at Neil’s confused expression. 

“Kevin bet Aaron five dollars that he’d walk in on you two kissing at least once this weekend,” she explained.

“I thought you guys kept it behind doors,” Aaron grumbled. Neil laughed and made a kissy face up at Andrew who didn’t look at all amused, but he bent down again and kissed Neil quickly. 

“You didn’t share a dorm with them for three years,” Kevin reminded Aaron. 

“Fuck off Day,” Aaron said. Kevin waved the five dollars in his face before crossing the room and collapsing into the armchair. 

“Be nice Aaron, they’re in a long-distance relationship now,” Katelyn said quietly. “Could you manage reuniting with me after a month and not kissing me every chance you’ve got?” Neil   
appreciated her understanding, but apparently it grated on Andrew who held on a little tighter to Neil’s shoulder. 

“No,” Aaron said honestly. “Just be PG,” he added, looking towards Neil and Andrew. 

“Of course,” Neil agreed, snaking his hand around Andrew’s waist and pulling him down onto his lap. “Hurting my shoulder,” Neil whispered, lips pressed to the nape of Andrew’s neck. Andrew relinquished his grip and took a deep breath. 

“How was your drive from campus?” Andrew forced out. Aaron and Katelyn lived at Columbia university in a student apartment, so it wasn’t exactly a far drive over to the house, but they both look pleasantly surprised by his question. Neil smiled against Andrew’s skin and wrapped his arms tighter around his waist. 

“It was good, Aaron didn’t kill any birds this time,” Katelyn answered with a small, amused smile. 

“Leave it alone, I tried to save the pigeon last time okay? Not my fault I’m studying human biology and not bird biology,” Aaron said. Neil and Kevin laughed, and it popped the tension bubble a little bit. Andrew’s body felt less rigid and both Aaron and Katelyn let out long breaths. 

“Hungry?” Katelyn asked the assembled men. 

“No, I’m good,” Neil said. “Kev?” 

“Huh?” Kevin asked, looking up from his phone, a frown line between his brows. 

“Food?” Aaron said, gesturing at the bag in Katelyn’s hand that Neil assumed contained food. 

“Oh, no, thank you though,” Kevin said. “Give Andrew ice cream though, he might be nicer,” he added. Katelyn tried and failed to hide her smile as she dug around her bag and pulled out a pint of chocolate cookie dough ice cream. Andrew didn’t say anything, but he held his hand up to catch it, followed by a spoon that would have sailed well and truly over his head if he didn’t have his goalkeeper reflexes. 

“Good catch,” Katelyn said. 

“Terrible throw,” Andrew replied.

“Definitely was,” Katelyn agreed, grinning. Andrew surveyed her, but Neil didn’t sense any danger, so he leaned around the man on his lap to look at Kevin again. 

“What’re you frowning at?” He asked. Katelyn and Aaron bustled off with their bags, leaving the trio alone again in the living room. 

“A new development in your online war,” Kevin said. 

“A war neither of us has really participated in,” Andrew said, pointing his spoon at Kevin. He quickly licked a glob of ice cream off the spoon before it could fall, and then pointed it back at Kevin as if the interruption hadn’t already ruined the dramatics. 

“What’s the development?” Neil asked. Kevin sighed and put his phone down on the coffee table.

“I was caught on camera with him at the airport and putting his bag in the trunk. The front of the car isn’t in any pics so no one can see that you were there,” he explained. 

“So what?” Andrew said. 

“They’re saying that I’m ‘Team Minyard’, like I chose to be on your side of the rivalry or whatever,” Kevin said. “It’s not like Neil and I have bedrooms across the hall from each other at my dad’s house or anything,” he added, voice dripping with sarcasm. Andrew had moved his head so his collar-length hair was covering the nape of his neck, but that didn’t stop Neil from kissing his neck again and pressing his face into his back. 

“There aren’t any sides though, we’re on the same side,” Neil mumbled. He pulled back and tugged a lock of Andrew’s hair. “Can you tie it up? It’s tickling my nose,” he said. Andrew didn’t say anything, but he put the ice cream down and hooked his finger under the hair tie Neil wore on his wrist until it came off. Neil wore the hair tie as a spare for Andrew if he needed it, even when they were states apart, but he still felt a loss when it was not there. Andrew tied his hair up in a bun behind his head and Neil put his forehead back against the top of his spine. Aaron and Katelyn came back into the room and sat down on the second armchair, Katelyn on the arm with her elbow on Aaron’s shoulder. 

“Team Minyard or Team Josten?” Kevin asked the pair of them. 

“What?” Katelyn asked, tilting her head. 

“Team Minyard,” Aaron answered without missing a beat. “Josten can suck it,” he added. Neil considered saying something inappropriate about ‘sucking it’ but decided to avoid creating possible drama. 

“Yeah he can,” Andrew said idly. So much for avoiding potential drama. 

“Great minds think alike,” Neil said.

“Gross,” Aaron said, but that was ignored so he carried on. “Is this about the publicity stunt feud thing?” 

“It isn’t a publicity stunt, we have nothing to do with it,” Neil said. 

“The media misconstrued something I said and it has since snowballed,” Andrew added. Aaron frowned, leaning forward on his knees. 

“This online hype wasn’t intentional?” Aaron asked. Neil and Andrew shook their heads, Andrew holding a spoonful of ice cream over his shoulder in Neil’s direction. Neil took it into his mouth and sucked the treat off the spoon before Andrew took it back. “Nicky said it would have been something the Lions PR team organised to hype you up, especially if they’re looking at recruiting Neil next year?” 

“No, we didn’t mean for this to happen,” Neil admitted. 

“Well shit,” Aaron said, leaning back. 

“So, Nicky thinks this rivalry would be good for them?” Kevin asked. 

“Yeah, seems that way. It’s why he keeps encouraging it,” Aaron said. Nicky did really quite well at his PR major and had already got his position in Erik’s cousin’s public relations firm in Germany, if any of them would have an idea on how this would play out it would be him. This seemed to be Kevin’s understanding as well because he nodded thoughtfully and sat back in his chair, looking a little more satisfied. 

“You two can antagonise as much as you want,” he decided. Neil shot him a scathing look and Andrew pointed his spoon at him again. 

“We weren’t looking for your permission,” Neil snapped at him. 

“At the end of the day, this is our relationship and what we choose to do or not do is up to us,” Andrew said. Neil hid his smile, but he didn’t miss the flash of respect on both Kevin and Aaron’s faces. “Which means, it’s up to us if and when we tell people, so keep your mouths shut.” 

“Of course, Andrew, we won’t speak out of turn,” Kevin agreed. Andrew turned his spoon on Aaron. 

“I haven’t yet,” Aaron reminded him. “I won’t say anything, neither of us will.” 

“We promise,” Katelyn agreed. 

“Thanks guys,” Neil said. Andrew nodded his agreement, buried his spoon back in the ice cream and got to his feet. 

“We are just going to be ourselves, see what happens,” Andrew said. They all knew what that meant; Andrew was an instigator and Neil had an attitude problem. “Anyway, birthday celebrations begin now.” He held his hand out for Neil who took it and let Andrew pull him to his feet. Katelyn took the ice cream from Andrew, which surprised both Neil and Andrew, but it did save them a detour to the kitchen on the way up the stairs. 

“What’re you doing?” Neil asked as Andrew led him up the stairs by his hand. 

“What do you think?” Andrew replied drily. Andrew pushed his door open and Neil pulled it closed behind them a moment before Neil was pushed against the door and Andrew kissed him deeply. “Yes or no?” Andrew asked against his mouth. 

“God yes,” Neil groaned back. 

“Good, because,” Andrew restrained Neil’s hands above his head against the door by his wrist. “I know…” he pressed slow, languid kisses down Neil’s neck sending shivers down his   
spine. “About…” he bit down hard on Neil’s shoulder and Neil yelped. “The fucking party.” Neil’s stomach bottomed out and Andrew slid his hand down the front of Neil’s pants. 

“How?” Neil gasped as Andrew tightened his grip on Neil’s wrists and the front of his pants. 

“I have my ways,” Andrew said. “And I am not happy about this party.” 

“So, you’re going to take it out on me?” Neil asked, lips quirking in a masochistic smile.

“Fuck yes,” Andrew confirmed. Neil felt flames of excitement in the pit of his stomach and he nodded his head eagerly. It had taken a lot of time, a lot of patience, no and yesses, and hard lines drawn, but eventually the two of them had worked out the limits to their sex life. Neil sometimes liked relinquishing all of his control to Andrew, the one man he trusted with his life. Andrew, for all that they switched, sometimes relished in taking back all of the control. Especially when Neil had done something like plan a surprise party for him. 

“I’m so fucked,” Neil muttered, letting his head fall back against the door. 

“Yes, you are,” Andrew agreed.


	6. "I Love All The Parts of You."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party!   
> The before and after party tenderness!  
> Renee and Allison are engaged but we knew that already!  
> Poor Andrew did not prepare to live this long!   
> #twinyards

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not have a beta reader!

“Holy fuck,” Neil said as Andrew walked into their bedroom. He was wearing tight black jeans, combat boots and a skin-tight t-shirt with artistically placed holes in the material showing his pale skin. Neil made grabby hands, something he’d seen in a movie that made Andrew scoff at the time, and Andrew looked unimpressed at the movement now. That didn’t stop him from stepping close to the bed, within arms-reach, and when Neil grabbed onto the front of his shirt and pulled, Andrew followed through until he was lying on top of Neil sideways on the bed. Neil slid his hands under the shirt, up and down Andrew’s sides before kissing him behind his ear. Andrew made a sound like an aborted moan and Neil dug his nails into the soft skin of Andrew’s hips. 

“You have a lot of grovelling to do because of this party,” Andrew told him. 

“That’s fine, I can do that,” Neil decided. He wasn’t a fan of begging or grovelling, but he was a fan of Andrew and he did have to make it up to him for organising the party. He knew that Andrew wasn’t completely opposed, if he was then he wouldn’t go, but he was a little annoyed that Neil had tried to organise it behind his back. Perhaps an oversight on Neil’s behalf, but he didn’t mind trying a little harder to make Andrew smile. He used his bodyweight, as slim and short as he was, to roll Andrew off him onto the bed and straddled his hips.

“Not happening, Josten,” Andrew said. “I just got dressed.” 

“No, wait!” Neil said, laughing as he tried to stay seated on Andrew’s hips as he bucked in an attempt to displace him. Andrew settled down and frowned up at him. 

“What are you doing?” 

“I don’t want to have sex, handsome, just trust me okay?” Neil said. Andrew nodded slowly, relaxing into the mattress under Neil who took a deep breath. He took Andrew’s hands and pressed them to the bed above his head gently. Andrew didn’t flinch, didn’t frown, even though the move often pre-empted sex. Andrew did trust him, and even though it had been years since their first kiss, Neil’s stomach fluttered gently because of it. “Will you stay there?” Neil asked.

“Unless I have to move,” Andrew replied. Neil smiled and pressed a quick kiss to Andrew’s lips before sitting back up. 

“Have I ever told you what I like most about you?” Neil asked. 

“Not in words,” Andrew said hesitantly. 

“But you know anyway?” Neil guessed. Andrew looked up at him for a long moment before nodding his head. 

“My loyalty,” Andrew said. Neil grinned and shook his head. 

“That was not what I meant, although I do very much appreciate that,” Neil told him. Andrew frowned at that, clearly not expecting that answer. 

“Yes or no?” Neil asked quietly, hovering his hands over the hem of Andrew’s tee. Neil couldn’t explain why his stomach felt like the consistency of melted chocolate or why his heart was beating like he’d just played an entire game. After years of being together, Neil couldn’t remember a moment when he’d outright said why he loved Andrew, what it was about him that he appreciated and valued. Neil wasn’t asking permission to touch Andrew right then, he was asking for permission to be gentle and vulnerable, and asking Andrew to be the same. Sex wasn’t always about sex with them, it was about trust and understanding and being together, but what Neil was asking for in that moment was even further than that. 

“Yes,” Andrew said after a considering pause. Neil pushed the hem of Andrew’s shirt up around his ribs and looked down at him. Andrew’s arms were defined and corded with muscles, shoulders strong and shapely, his legs thick and capable. Andrew’s stomach had a pouch of fat over hard, firm core muscles. It was Andrew’s stomach that Neil loved more than any other part of his body (face excluded). It was always soft to touch, to rest his head, to kiss. The only part of Andrew that people wouldn’t consider ‘perfect’ but was perfect to Neil. He put his hands on Andrew’s stomach and met Andrew’s golden gaze. 

“Here,” Neil said quietly. “I love this part of you because it’s soft. And I love your eyes, your mouth… your hair.” Neil swallowed against his dry mouth and when Andrew moved his hands to Neil’s thighs resting on either side of Andrew’s hips, Neil smiled down at him. “I love all the parts of you,” he said honestly. It was the closest Neil had ever come to saying ‘I love you’ to anyone since he was a child. 

“I love all the parts of you too,” Andrew said, his voice a tiny bit hoarse. Neil nodded his head, accepting that for everything that it meant to them, and when Andrew pulled Neil down for a long, lingering kiss, Neil went easily. 

By design of all surprise parties, the guests of honour were the last to arrive, Kevin, Neil and Katelyn with them. It wasn’t a surprise party anymore, it never had been for Aaron and apparently it hadn’t been a surprise to Andrew for over a month, but the assembled guests still cheered out when the group went up the back stairs, staying away from the main floor of Eden’s Twilight.   
“Oh, wow, so surprised,” Aaron said. Andrew pointed at his twin in agreement.

“I did my best guys,” Neil said with a shrug as if to say, ‘what could I do?’.   
After the initial reaction to their entrance, Katelyn and Aaron drifted to their friends from Columbia and Neil felt a moment of happiness for them. Aaron looked at ease, comfortable in his own skin with Katelyn at his side and his new friends passionate about the same things as him. Renee and Allison melted out of the crowd towards them. 

“Hey Ally!” Neil said, letting her squeeze him into a tight hug. Renee and Andrew embraced just as tightly before the two of them moved aside to catch up. Kevin caught sight of Dan and Matt and slapped Neil on the shoulder before heading over to them. 

“How you doing babe?” Ally asked. 

“I’m good, better now that… well, yeah,” Neil said, looking over at Andrew. 

“To have him back,” Allison guessed. Neil nodded, feeling sheepish, turning back to Allison. 

“I know I sent you flowers,” Neil said, grinning at her, “but congratulations on the engagement!” He grabbed her hand and the large ring flashed in the dim club lights. It was big and beautiful and so fitting for Allison. She grinned back and wiggled her fingers. 

“Thank you, thank you,” she said. “Took her long enough to ask me!” 

“You’ve been together for two years, what do you mean ‘long enough’?” Neil scoffed. She gave him a winning smile and squeezed his shoulder as if in sympathy. 

“He’ll ask you one day,” she said. Neil burst out laughing and shook his head. 

“Not in a million years, but that’s fine,” he said. “I’ve honestly never thought about getting married. I know he’s the only one for me, and I like to think it’s vice versa.” 

“Sure Neil, whatever you tell yourself,” Allison teased. He rolled his eyes at her, but when Allison offered to get him a drink, he allowed it. “You driving?” 

“Yes, I am, just soda please,” he told her. She nodded and went to the bar, pausing to kiss Renee’s cheek as she passed. Andrew looked over at Neil who nodded to let him know he was okay, and wandered over to Matt, Dan and Kevin. Matt lifted Neill off his feet in a bear hug, spinning him around, and then messing up his hair. Dan gave him a one-armed hug and told her how proud of him she was with how he’d been captaining the Foxes in her wake. 

At some point during the night, when Kevin and Allison were drunkenly dancing together and Matt had taken Dan home before she got too drunk to walk, Neil fetched up against the bar with Renee and Andrew like the good old days. Andrew wasn’t sober, but when Neil leaned his shoulder against the blonde, he didn’t budge.   
“Nice party Red,” Roland said, handing Neil another glass of soda.

“Thanks for serving Ro, but you could have come as a guest,” Neil told the older man. Roland waved that away and pushed a shot towards Andrew. 

“I’m where I’m meant to be,” Roland said amicably. “However, it is three thirty-five and officially the fourth of November so happy birthday Andrew,” he cheered. Andrew threw the shot back and dropped the glass back on the table. 

“I didn’t think I would make it to twenty-four,” Andrew said quietly. Roland hesitated, as if not sure what to do with that information. Neil had expected to hear it at some point, clearly so did Renee because she pulled a face at him. 

“You’ve done good Andrew,” she said quietly. Neil put his arms around Andrew and stood behind him, kissing his cheek. 

“Happy birthday Drew,” he murmured. “I’m glad you made it to twenty-four.” 

“What are we getting all lovery dovery for?” Kevin slurred, mascara smeared under his bottom eyelashes and stumbling over with Allison under his arm. 

“It’s the fourth now,” Renee said. The two drunken partiers looked on blankly before the penny dropped. 

“Happy birthday monster!” Allison cried, waving her hand. “Happy birthday to the twin monsters!” She said loudly. Neil looked over at Aaron who rolled his eyes, but held his drink up at the group gathered at the bar. Katelyn and the last two of their friends laughed and cheered too.

“Happy birthday Andrew,” Kevin slurred. “And Aaron birthday too!” 

“I think, maybe, that it’s time I take my fiancé home,” Renee said kindly, wrapping a strong arm around the waist of the leggy blonde. 

“Yes, home,” Allison agreed. “Kevin come home too? We have vodka!” 

“Nope, he’s coming with us,” Neil said, putting his hand around Kevin’s bicep to keep him close. Renee and Allison said their goodbyes and left, followed shortly after by the last of Katelyn and Aaron’s friends. Aaron ad Katelyn came over to the bar where Neil, Kevin and Andrew were seated while Roland washed glasses.   
“You two ready to go?” Neil asked them. They were both clearly intoxicated, but Katelyn was a little more with it. 

“Yes, absolutely,” Katelyn said. “Thank you for your work tonight Roland,” she added. The bartender grinned and saluted. 

“Happy birthday twin terrors, I will be seeing you around,” Roland said. 

“Bye Roland,” they said in unison, one of the few eerie twin things they’d picked up as they grew closer. Aaron wore his glasses all the time and had refused to grow his hair the way Andrew did, and with the armbands that Andrew still wore, they were so much easier to tell apart, but they now said things or did things in unison as if they’d finally found their footing. 

“Hey, boys,” Roland said as the group got to their feet. Neil slid his arm around Kevin to keep him standing, but everyone paused to see what Roland was going to say. “I’m proud of both of you, for turning into the men you have become. I remember when you started working here, I know what you’ve come from and been through, but I am so fucking proud of you.” He sounded so genuine, and Neil could see on his face how much he meant it. Andrew and Aaron both inclined their heads in acceptance. Neil’s stomach turned over gently, a mix of his own pride and maybe a slight ruefulness that he hadn’t said it first.

“Thank you, Roland,” Aaron said, voice tight. 

“See you around,” Andrew added. Katelyn and Andrew helped Aaron from his chair before Katelyn led the way out of the bar and down the stairs. Andrew staggered with his twin, and Neil struggled with Kevin’s overgrown drunkenness down the stairs and out the front doors. 

“Ooh pretty flowers,” Kevin said, lurching to a stop. Neil was yanked to a stop too, trying to keep his giant brother from toppling forward or onto Neil. 

“What?” He demanded in exasperation. 

“Flowers next to the wall,” Kevin slurred. Neil looked and saw that Kevin was looking at a small grove of weeds. 

“You have got to be kidding me,” Neil grumbled, scowling at Kevin’s supposed flowers. Neil heard Andrew snap his fingers for attention and looked over at him, waving him on with Aaron. “I’m good,” he said. Andrew rolled his eyes and turned around to take Aaron to the car while Neil gently tried to pull Kevin after them. They’d only just started moving when Kevin lurched to another stop and before Neil could blink Kevin was taking a picture of the two of them. Neil was about to demand he delete it, but Kevin made a funny, almost fond noise, and showed him the screen. 

“You look so cute!” He said. The picture could have been worse, somehow it wasn’t even blurry. 

“Thanks, let’s go,” he said. Kevin followed him and Andrew watched from the passenger side as Neil got him in the car on one side of Katelyn, with Aaron on her other. Andrew uncrossed his arms and climbed into the car, Neil into the driver’s seat.   
While they drove, Andrew put his hand on Neil’s leg and Neil let go of all thoughts, just drove to the house from muscle memory. When they got to the house, Katelyn took Aaron up the stairs and they heard the shower cut on. Andrew and Neil pulled Kevin into the house and deposited him to the couch where it was up to him to stay if he wanted or struggle to Nicky’s bedroom, but they weren’t going to put any more effort in now that he was home safe. 

“Come,” Andrew said, holding his hand out. Neil laced their fingers together, grabbed a bottle of water from the kitchen and let Andrew lead the way back to the front steps of the house. They closed the door behind them and sat down together, shoulder to shoulder, thigh to thigh, hand in hand. 

“I’m proud of you too, by the way,” Neil said quietly. Andrew snorted and leaned against Neil a little more, taking a swig of water. 

“Always knew you were a little jealous of Roland,” he said after swallowing. Neil groaned, but Andrew was hiding a small smile behind the rim of the bottle and looking at him out of the corner of his eyes. 

“No, not jealous… just aware of, well, yeah,” Neil said.

“You? Aware?” Andrew drawled. “You had no idea what was going on, for like a year,” he said.

“Maybe so,” Neil agreed with a laugh. He leaned over and kissed his cheek, squeezing his hand a little tighter. “Happy birthday Drew.” 

“Thanks Junkie,” Andrew replied, a little more emotion in his voice than Neil was expecting. Andrew coughed, clearing his throat and put the bottle down. He turned into Neil and pressed his face against his neck, a silent request to be held. Neil did so, no questions asked, and although Andrew didn’t cry, he could feel him fighting his inebriation and his emotions for control. Neil held him together until Andrew pulled back.

“You alright?” Neil asked softly. Andrew nodded and grabbed for the bottle again. A few years ago, it would have been a bottle of alcohol he reached for as the two of them sat together, but not anymore. Andrew wanted to be closer to sober before he went to bed, and Neil could respect that. 

“Yeah, I’m alright,” Andrew said. It was his way of suggesting they move past the moment and Neil obliged. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, which had vibrated while he held Andrew together, and saw a notification from Kevin on Twitter. 

“This bitch,” he said, shaking his head. He pulled up the Tweet and groaned, rubbing his forehead. It was the selfie he’d taken in the carpark, the caption somehow literate. ‘I guess I’m #TeamJosten tonight #brothers @josten10! And happy 25th birthday #twinyards @aminyard03 @aaronminyard’ with a fox, tornado, lion and doctor emoji. 

“That’s enough for today,” Andrew said, pushing the phone away. Neil nodded and pocketed his phone, got to his feet and pulled Andrew up after him. 

“Let’s go to bed birthday boy,” Neil said. Andrew nodded tiredly.


	7. "I Do Hate You."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just #minyardjostenrivalry things.  
> Neil likes causing a bit of chaos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank @mnad96 for their continued support and encouragement on this fic! 
> 
> Really, really, really short update. Hence why you're all getting two today <3

“They do not waste much time,” Aaron said. It was the first thing Neil heard as he walked into the kitchen and he frowned at him. 

“What?” 

“Did you see Twitter?” He asked. Neil shook his head, turning on the coffee machine. He knew Andrew would follow shortly, he’d woken up when Neil climbed from the bed, and he was hoping his boyfriend could entertain Aaron while Neil was still waking up.   
“Pics from the party, well after the party,” Aaron said. “Some four AM shots that look like you hate each other again.” 

“What?” Neil repeated. Aaron rolled his eyes and slid his phone towards Neil across the countertop. Neil sighed and picked up the cell phone, peering still bleary eyed at the duo of pictures. One was of Neil scowling at Andrew, hand up mid-gesture, Kevin nearly bent double as he tried to look at the weeds. The one next to it was Andrew rolling his eyes and turning Aaron around. 

"It really does look like we hate each other when things like this get taken out of context," Neil allowed. 

"I do hate you," Andrew said, coming into the kitchen. "What's happened now?" 

"They've started calling it the 'Minyard Josten Rivalry'," Aaron said. Andrew reached for the phone, looked at the picture and shrugged. 

"The reporter who took this picture would have seen us get into the same car, they're picking and choosing what to release. Eventually they'll get bored of the rivalry and we'll be inundated by pictures of us not hating each other," Andrew said. Neil didn't feel convinced, he also didn't know how long it would be until people got bored. The idea of more private pictures being released was not one Neil liked either, but encouraging chaos? That he could do. 

"Finish the coffees? I'll be back down in a moment," Neil said to Andrew. His boyfriend nodded, let Neil kiss his forehead and then Neil was running up the stairs to his own phone. He sent out two quick Tweets. One was a picture Katelyn had taken of all of the Foxes past and present at the party. Andrew and Aaron were front and centre, either because they were the smallest or because it was their birthday Neil didn't know, and Neil was closer to the back with his arms around Matt and Robin's waists. Robin and Neil were laughing, heads inclined to each other and eyes alight with joy as the photo was taken. He captioned it 'Cute smile @robinisafox #foxesreunion #twinyard24thbday'. The second was better. It just said 'happy birthday @amminyard!!' 

"Mother fucker!" Aaron yelled, seeing the birthday Tweet and the fact Neil didn’t post one for Andrew. As Neil descended the steps, there was a pause, probably as the phone was passed to Andrew, and then Andrew laughed. Neil smiled to himself and when Andrew came into view he put his arms around his waist and kissed the nape of his neck. Andrew didn't laugh a lot, and it had taken a long time until Neil had heard it from a sober, happier Andrew, but every time he coaxed it out of Andrew he felt satisfied for hours.


	8. "I'm Not His Friend"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew watches Neil win his last championship as a Fox  
> A media man pisses off Neil  
> Andrew waits up for Neil's call (but don't tell anyone)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter dedication: AO3 user @ncas for their support on my last update   
> Special mention: again, thank you @mnad96 for all of your encouragement, your comments are always so sweet!!
> 
> I forgot to update yesterday, but I have a good reason (I got pet mice and I was very excited to bond with them, and I filmed a helluva lot of cosplay TikToks oops).
> 
> I don't have a beta reader, please be nice to me!

"So, he won three championships during his college career, two as captain, that's gotta look good for the pro scouts," Olivia said, eyes still glued to the TV. Unfortunately, Andrew couldn't get to South Carolina for the Class one Exy championship game, but Neil had played like the demon he was and the game may as well have been over the minute he began. Andrew knew it was important to him, to win his last game at Palmetto, his last game as a Fox. His chest was aching with pride as he watched Neil get carried on the shoulders of his team, celebrations warring on screen. Palmetto Foxes, the mismatch team of trauma and affliction, had brought home another trophy to put in Allison's cabinet.   
"I won't tell anyone I've seen you smile," Olivia said. Andrew pulled a face at her, but didn't try to hide it. 

"I have no doubt he'll make it to a pro team, it just won't be the Lions," Andrew said. 

"You don't think so?" Olivia asked, tucking a lock of her jaw length hair behind her ear. 

"We'll only have room for one recruit next season, they're going to choose a second girl," he said. 

"Someone could get injured this season, then we'll have room for a second recruit," Olivia offered. Andrew knew she was placating him, wanting him to have a little bit of hope, but she didn't need to. Both Neil and Andrew had already discussed the probability of still being on separate teams next year. It would still be shitty, but they'd make it work, Andrew wasn't worried. 

"We'll see," he allowed. "Now let's watch him open his mouth and see how he pisses off the reporters," he said. Olivia laughed and turned the volume up just a little as Neil was herded to the foyer with his co-captain to tackle the press. 

"What bait will he give the Minyard Josten Rivalry?" She wondered. Andrew smiled into his glass of water. The Minyard Josten Rivalry hadn't died down yet, which Andrew was surprised by. Pictures circulated whenever they were spotted together, but always with one of them pulling a face or making a crude hand gesture. Nicky fanned the flames weekly by posting pics with either Team Josten or Team Minyard printed on his shirt, depending on who was trending more that week. Neil taunted Andrew in post-game press, nothing inherently mean, often just inside jokes or jibes to counteract Andrew's own comments from press conferences. Andrew's favourite part of their online presence was the indirect comments. If Neil missed a rebound or got slammed into the wall by a backliner, Andrew would make a Tweet like 'I thought he'd have learnt it hurts if you let them do that' or 'I’d take a shot every time he missed the rebound but I'd die of alcohol poisoning'. Neil had already said, multiple times, he'd return the favour starting in two weeks when the pro league began.   
Neil had three months left of college before summer vacation. Andrew had six months of games. Somewhere along the way, Neil would find his new team, but until then (and after graduation) Neil would move in with Andrew and Olivia. 

"Congratulations Neil Josten, you've won three championships during your college exy career, how do you feel?" A reporter asked. Neil was still breathing hard and his cheeks were red, but he was grinning so hard it looked nearly painful. 

"So proud of my team, proud to be a Fox! I have no words," Neil said. 

"That's a first," Andrew muttered. Olivia laughed and threw a couch cushion at him. 

"I'm going to Team Minyard that," she teased. Andrew didn't know what she meant until his phone buzzed with a notification from her. Neil's co-captain was talking so Andrew checked the Tweet. 

'@josten10: I don’t have any words  
@aminyard03: that's a first  
#TeamMinyard #MinyardJostenRivalry' 

"You're a jerk," Andrew told her. 

"Can I have my pillow back?" She replied. Andrew tossed it to her as a reporter turned back to Neil. 

"Neil, you're graduating in three months, what are your plans? Are you hoping for a pro contract or will you aim to use your degree?" 

"Not sure what a math degree will get me," Neil said breezily. "I'm looking forward to following in the footsteps of my friends; Matt, Kevin, Jean, Jeremy, Laila and Grace. They inspired me every day this year to do better, to make it to pros, I won't let them down." He looked so humble and earnest, Andrew laughed. He meant it, sure, but it had obviously been semi-scripted by Abby or Wymack. 

"He didn't mention you," Olivia noted. "Not one of his inspiring pro-league friends." 

"I'm not his friend," Andrew reminded her. 

"Was that intentional?" She asked. 

"The rivalry would have influenced the wording choice, sure, but he's also just being private. He's not about to talk about his boyfriend on live television," Andrew said. 

"You played with Andrew Minyard for four years. He overcame great adversity and trauma and made it to the pro leagues. You don't consider him an inspiration too?" The reporter asked. Andrew quirked his eyebrow and leaned back in his seat.

"This could get interesting," he mused. Olivia was frozen on her side of the couch. Neil's ecstatic smile had melted into something closer to a barely concealed snarl of anger, probably because of the reminder of Andrew's trauma. If Neil announced their relationship now, Andrew wouldn't be surprised or even annoyed. To anyone who knew Neil, his scowl was of protectiveness and annoyance at the insinuation that Neil didn't value Andrew as a player or someone worth looking up to. Foxes old and new, as well as Laila and Alvarez and Jean and Jeremy, would know what that look meant. To the media though, it looked like Neil was just angry at being reminded Andrew existed.

“Make no mistake,” Neil said slowly, savage tone of voice thinly veiled with warning. “Andrew Minyard knows exactly how I feel about him, and I can assure you, those feelings are mutual.” Neil licked his lip and straightened up. Andrew nodded in satisfaction and took another mouthful of water. He felt Olivia’s gaze on him and he looked over at her. She was studying him, maybe wanting him to react to Neil’s answer. 

“Well he didn’t lie,” Andrew pointed out. 

“It sounded like he hates you, and that you hate him back,” she said, sounding more exasperated than was probably warranted. 

“But he doesn’t,” he said. She nodded, giving him that. 

“No, he doesn’t.” 

“You know what he meant, I know what he meant, those who matter know what he meant, fuck the rest of them,” he said. 

“That’s going to be all over social media by the end of the night,” Olivia said. “I will show you all the Tumblr posts,” she added. Andrew didn’t bother saying he didn’t want her to, she would anyway. Andrew saw most of the discourse on Twitter, but the rivalry had spread to other social medias too, especially Tumblr. It was there that people were writing in depth theories about what had caused Andrew and Neil to fallout, created timelines, and apparently there were often fights between those on Neil’s ‘side’ and those who supported Andrew. Olivia found it amusing, but Andrew didn’t really care much for it. 

The thing was, she was right. Later that night, #MinyardJostenRivalry was trending again and people had turned Neil’s response into a meme. Andrew let Olivia read some arguments from Tumblr to him, mostly between two young women who seemed so desperate to understand what it was that had ‘ended the friendship’ while a third female, one Andrew considered the voice of reason, continued to get in the way and point any and all flaws in their logic.   
“’Come on, they don’t hate each other. Neil was at Andrew’s birthday party for god’s sake, whenever Andrew is in South Carolina he visits the Foxes, but who there is he visiting? Kevin, Nicky and Aaron aren’t there, the only two people we know Andrew ever cared about who is still there are Robin and Neil. We know they are private people, of course they wouldn’t tell us what’s really going on and let us run around in circles, so just stop second guessing them and let them live’,” Olivia read. 

“I don’t hate her,” Andrew said. Olivia rolled onto her back where she lay on his bed and Andrew was wondering how long it would take for her to drop her phone on her face. 

“Her URL is ‘teamwhocares-itsjustexy’ which is very apt,” she agreed. Andrew hummed his agreement and turned his phone over and over in his hand. He was waiting for Neil to call, which he would never admit to anyone. He knew Neil would be celebrating the win and Andrew didn’t want to take him away from that, but he missed him, and he wanted to hear his voice. He wouldn’t have ever thought himself the kind of person who would wait for a call just to say goodnight to his boyfriend, but here he was. Andrew was just about to put his phone away and accept that he wouldn’t hear from Neil that night when his phone started ringing. Andrew’s heart squeezed, but he blamed it on the distance between them, it was easier to miss him. 

“Hey,” Andrew answered the call, toeing Olivia with his socked foot until she rolled from his bed with an inelegant grunt. 

“Hey handsome,” Neil said. He sounded tipsy and in good spirits, but not too inebriated to hold a conversation. There was faint music in the background, it sounded like Neil had slipped off to an empty room to make the call in the middle of a party. 

“Hey Neil!” Olivia yelled before the door closed behind her. 

“Sup Livia!” Neil yelled directly into Andrew’s ear. Andrew winced and nestled down in his blankets. 

“Congratulations on the win,” Andrew said quietly. When Neil spoke, Andrew could hear how much he was grinning. 

“Did you watch?” 

“Yes,” Andrew confirmed. “Your mouth is going to get us into trouble, again.” 

“Probably,” Neil said with a laugh. “I’m just glad you watched.”

“I would have been there if I could,” Andrew said. 

“I know!” Neil assured him. “It was a pretty good game. The Foxes stepped up.” 

“You stepped up,” Andrew reminded him, letting himself smile alone in his room. “You’ll have pro teams lining up to have you on their team.” 

“Not the Lions though?” Neil guessed. Andrew chewed on his lip for a moment, trying not to feel the disappointment. 

“No, I don’t think so,” he agreed. “But you will be in Chicago soon enough.” 

“You are coming here next weekend?” 

“Yes, but then the following weekend we start games and who knows where I’ll be,” he said. Neil laughed, but it was a little sad. 

“You’ll be in Chicago, your first game is a home game against the Pythons,” he said. Andrew rolled his eyes to look up at the ceiling, his chest feeling as if someone was filling his heart with helium. Of course he’d know that. His exy fuelled junkie. 

“Maybe you can join the Lions as my manager,” he said. Neil snorted derisively. 

“Learn your own damn fixtures,” he said. Andrew sighed, solely to be dramatic, and Neil’s laugh was everything Andrew wanted to hear. 

“If I have to,” Andrew said, sounding as petty as he intended. 

“You’re a drama queen,” Neil said, but there was no heat in his voice. If anything, it was kind and fond. 

“And you’re wasting my time,” Andrew replied. Neil laughed as if he’d expected no less from Andrew, but appreciated him anyway. 

“Well, I can go if you want, get your beauty sleep,” Neil said, clearly knowing full well that neither of them wanted that. 

“Aren’t you at a party?” Andrew asked. Neil made a noncommittal sound that made Andrew’s smile grow. “Having that much fun?” 

“I am now,” he teased. “The party has spilled out into the halls of Fox Tower, but I’m in my dorm. I was well and truly over partying, I wanted to talk to you.” 

“What about?” Andrew asked. 

“Just anything,” he murmured. “I miss you so much.” 

“You’re drunk.” 

“No!” Neil wailed. “I had two drinks; I promise.” 

“I don’t care how much you drink,” Andrew said. “I miss you too.” 

“You should, I’m funny,” Neil said. Andrew, despite himself, laughed. He settled back down into his bed and under his blankets. “Are you in bed?” 

“Yes.” 

“Are you tired?” Neil asked. Andrew wasn’t about to say that the only reason he was still awake was because he’d been waiting for Neil’s call, so he didn’t say anything. “Well I’m tired, stay on the phone until I fall asleep?” 

“Want me to read?” Andrew asked. It had become a tradition of sorts, on the nights Neil wanted Andrew to stay on the phone until he fell asleep, that Andrew would read to him. They would never tell anyone, it was one of their secrets, a moment of softness that no one except each other knew they were capable of. 

“Yes,” Neil said. Andrew reangled his light, put on his glasses and opened the book left on his bedside table from earlier that week. The fact that outside of this room, the world thought that the two of them had an intense hatred for the other was near enough laughable.


	9. "Not the Only Thing I Can Get Behind."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil surprises Andrew at his first ever pro game  
> Soft sleepy Andreil  
> Neil gets Andrew's Insta password

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No s3x occurs, but they're naked so like go off I guess. It is rated M for a reason. 
> 
> Second update because I forgot yesterday, but this one is kind of short lmao. 
> 
> Some of the later chapters I have written are huge so that's fun and to look forward to.

Neil tried to keep his mouth closed as he sat in the stadium seating of the home court of the Chicago Lions. It was the first game of the season for the pro teams, specifically it was Andrew’s team against the Houston Pythons. The Foxhole Court was familiar territory, as were the other stadiums that he’d played in for the past five years, but the professional league stadiums were as big and impressive as Evermore Stadium, with less depressing red and black. The Lions’ colours were yellow and black, and you could tell that from the moment you saw the stadium. When Abby had readily agreed to lend Neil her car so he could spend all of Friday driving to Chicago just to watch Andrew’s first game, he’d had to work hard to stop his fingers from trembling. Neil hadn’t exactly had a plan when he’d booked the ticket to the game, he’d just figured he’d work that out after the fact. Having a car, and a letter from Wymack to excuse him from classes was a blessing, even if that meant ignoring the fact that he had exams in two months.   
Neil sat alone in the stadium, a black hoodie that used to be Andrew’s pulled over his hands and low over his face. He could see the game, but no one could see him. He wasn’t there to be seen, he wasn’t there to be noticed, and he wasn’t there for attention. Neil just wanted to be there for Andrew’s first game.   
Neil sat up straighter as the inner court doors opened and the two teams walked on to raucous applause and cheering. It was just for warming up, there was no introduction or order of who walked on, and only half of both teams filed on. Goalies and strikers mainly, one or two defenders, setting up for drills. Neil tracked Andrew as he walked in his bulky armour and yellow jersey, his big goalkeeper racquet slung over his shoulders. Neil didn’t yell, didn’t shout, cheer or scream, he just watched with his hammering heart.   
Neil spent the game in relative silence as Andrew played. He honest to god played. It wasn’t the best of his ability, Neil knew what that looked like and this wasn’t it, and he stopped goals as if it was a casual scrimmage, but he only let in three goals in his half. Three goals for a new recruit playing an entire half, with the statistics saying the Pythons took an astounding two hundred shots on goals was astounding. Neil grinned to himself as the stadium emptied out. ‘@aminyard03 good game, can’t wait to wipe the floor with your smug attitude next year’ he Tweeted before clattering down the steps and out of the stadium where he found Andrew’s Maserati in the parking lot.   
He knew Andrew wouldn’t be long when his boyfriend liked and replied to his Tweet. ‘Once you learn to score you can start talking a big game’. Neil pocketed his phone and held onto his arms, staring at the player entrance. Andrew and Olivia walked out together, ahead of everyone else, and Andrew froze when he saw Neil standing at his car. Neil wasn’t in the mood to pretend, so he broke into a run across the lot and directly into Andrew’s arms. 

“Hey handsome,” he murmured. 

“What the ever-loving fuck are you doing here?” Andrew demanded. 

“I wanted to see your first game,” he said. Andrew put his hand on the back of Neil’s neck and guided him close for a kiss. 

“You’re the worst, you know I hate surprises,” he said. Neil smiled against his lips because he knew what that meant and curled his fingers in the belt loops of Andrew’s jeans. 

“Ahem,” Olivia cleared her throat. Andrew pulled away and did the basic introductions. Neil shook her hand politely. 

“What happens now?” Andrew asked. 

“I have Abby’s car and I don’t have to be back until Sunday night so… mind if I stay over for the weekend?” He asked. Andrew didn’t even think twice, he just tossed his keys at Olivia so she could drive the Maserati home and slid his hand into Neil’s. 

“Yes.” 

“See you at home,” Olivia said with a laugh. Neil dragged Andrew over to Abby’s little blue car and when Andrew held his hand out for the keys, Neil relinquished them without worry. 

A couple of hours later Neil and Andrew were half-asleep in Andrew’s bed and Neil unplugged his phone from charge. Andrew, who had his front to Neil’s back and arm around his waist started kissing his shoulders in an attempt to stop him moving. Neil chuckled and fell back into the warm embrace and the pillows, his phone in his hand.   
“Anything new in our tag?” Andrew asked, only half curious. Neil hummed and unlocked his phone to Twitter. 

“People wondering why we would watch each other’s games if we hate each other so much,” he observed. “People seem to be saying that we are so caught up in hating each other we haven’t considered the possibility that we just don’t have to watch or engage.” 

“People are so stupid,” Andrew decided.

“They are,” he agreed. “You haven’t posted on Instagram this week…” Neil said, hoping to segue into the real reason he’d reached for his phone even though it could potentially annoy Andrew. His stomach was flipped over with nerves and excitement. 

“Doesn’t matter, I’ll post twice next week. Fiona and I have an understanding,” Andrew answered. Neil rolled into a seated position; legs crossed as he looked down at where Andrew lay. Neither of them was dressed, but Neil didn’t feel the need to pull the covers over his lap and Andrew had the comforter bunched up around his ribs. 

“You could post one now?” Neil suggested. Andrew narrowed his eyes at him and rested the back of his head on his forearm. 

“What of? My ceiling?” He asked. Neil shook his head slowly.

“No,” he licked his lips and smiled. “You don’t post any pictures of yourself… you could do that now.” 

“Why?” Andrew asked, which was better than outright saying no. 

“Because you’re hot,” Neil replied with a sly smile. Andrew looked up at the ceiling as if asking for divine intervention, or maybe just strength. Neil had been completely honest. With his chest bare and his hair mussed in what could only be described as sexily messy, his strong jawline and defined cheekbones shadowed from the lamplight, his muscles flexing every time he moved, he was incredibly hot. If he and Andrew weren’t both physically spent, then Neil might have licked him. 

“Is that the only reason?” Andrew asked. Neil smirked at him, feeling known. 

“No, obviously,” he said. “I want to take the picture. You bought me a camera; you can’t blame me.” Neil tried for an innocent expression, but it wouldn’t have fooled Andrew who huffed and nodded his head. 

“Let me put my bands on,” he sighed. Neil grinned and opened up his camera app on his phone as Andrew tugged his bands on and lay back down on his pillows in the exact same position with his arm behind his head, his other hand touching the blanket on his stomach. Neil had two angles he could take the photo that would work best, one where he was seated so the camera would show the length of his body and the ridges of his chest and shoulder muscles, or Neil could stand over him and take a picture from above with Andrew staring up at him. Neil was still entirely naked and standing over Andrew like that and taking a photo was thrilling so that’s what Neil did. Immediately, Andrew’s hands curled into fists and his pupils dilated, and Neil took a photo for only him to ever see. He grinned mischievously down at him and let Andrew regain his composure, loosen his grip and lick his lips. 

“Stop looking at my dick,” Neil told him. Andrew drew his gaze back up to the camera, his gaze heavy, but more controlled. 

“You’re getting hard,” was all Andrew said. 

“I told you I think you’re hot, now shush,” Neil said. Andrew stilled, his lips slightly parted, and Neil took the picture before letting himself drop down to his knees on either side of Andrew’s hips. “Here, login to your Instagram.” Neil handed Andrew his phone with the app open to add a second account. Neil’s own account was simply just pictures of the Foxes that he’d taken on his new phone, no pictures of just himself or really anything else, but he had a feeling that would need to change next year when he joined a pro team. Andrew handed the phone back and put his hands-on Neil’s thighs, watching Neil’s face. 

“If you start posting on my Instagram, it’ll save me a lot of hassle,” Andrew said. Neil raised his eyebrow and looked up from the screen of his phone. 

“Is that permission to post pictures?” Neil asked. Andrew shrugged with one shoulder and nodded slowly. 

“Yeah, you take better pictures than I do. Just don’t be an idiot,” he said. Neil grinned and dropped one hand to rest on Andrew’s chest in a comforting touch as he made the post. You wouldn’t know just by looking at the picture that his boyfriend was standing naked above him, but you could tell that Andrew was fond of whoever took the picture. The usually stoic and apathetic instigator had a heavy, content look on his face, his lips parted in the beginning of a lazy smile, and he looked so comfortable with his arm behind his head and blonde hair messed from being in bed. 

“‘This is the kind of post-game celebration I can get behind #ChicagoLions #goodnight’ sound good?” Neil asked. Andrew’s smile was slow and the look in his eyes was dirty, which meant Neil very much wanted to know what he was thinking. 

“Not the only thing I can get behind,” Andrew said, almost casually. Neil laughed, posted the picture, and let Andrew pull him down for a kiss. 

“It’s bedtime,” he murmured against Andrew’s lips. Andrew agreed with a stifled yawn, pulling Neil to the mattress and into his side the moment Neil had the lamp switched off. 

“Thank you for coming tonight,” Andrew mumbled. Neil smiled into Andrew’s warm skin before biting him gently. Andrew pinched Neil’s waist in return. 

“Goodnight Drew,” he whispered. Andrew kissed the top of Neil’s head, but it was unfocused and fumbled, heavy with sleep. 

The next day, Neil had a moment of regret about having Andrew’s Instagram account logged into his phone. The sheer amount of notifications he woke up to was quite frankly alarming. The general consensus was that Andrew was incredibly sexy, and a lot of people were demanding to know who had taken such an intimate picture of the blonde. Neil didn’t engage with any of the comments, not from his own account or from Andrews, but he considered making it known that he had been the one to take the picture. He didn’t really see the point, it would just out their relationship, but the urge was so strong for a moment that he typed out a comment before deleting it. He supposed it would lay a claim to Andrew, but he knew he didn’t really need to. He knew Andrew was his, and vice versa, he didn’t need to tell the world about it.


	10. "If He Calls Me Spitfire One More Time..."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil moves in with Andrew and Olivia temporarily.  
> Neil gets a clue (he's oblivious bless him).  
> Neil gets talked about on the radio.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a beta reader now! Everyone say hi to @ncas here on AO3, she is a sweetheart and I am really excited that someone has volunteered to do this for me!!  
> Also, I have learnt how to format on here now so if things look a lil different it's because I can use italics and shit now so yay! 
> 
> I'm dedicating this chapter to my two mice because they keep me company when I'm writing at three am.

Neil owned more now than he had ever owned in his life. Still, his three boxes and college messenger bag of clothes, shoes and books was barely a dent in Olivia and Andrew’s apartment. Olivia had been pro for two years before Andrew joined the team, and the apartment she’d bought was sleek, modern and flash. Olivia, with her down to earth attitude and her vintage clothing style, seemed out of place inside her own house. Andrew didn’t fit in either, not with the abstract art décor all over the place and uncomfortable looking seats. What Neil found sadistically funny was that most of the seats in the apartment, other than the low sofa, were taller than your average home. Most of the time Neil’s toes touched the ground, but only just, which meant Andrew’s feet were often swinging. Neil had noticed it when he stayed at Andrew and Olivia’s for the weekend three months before, but now that Neil was moving in until he accepted a pro team’s offer, he paid attention to things like Andrew’s swinging feet.  
“Don’t say a damn thing,” Andrew warned, stilling his feet where he sat at the breakfast bar. Neil dropped the last of his things- his Foxes sports bag and racquet and his old, battered duffel bag- onto the kitchen bench and pulled a face at him.

“I didn’t say anything!” He said, hands up in surrender. Andrew didn’t look amused as he slid an impassive look at him. Neil grinned and went around the kitchen countertop to him, sliding his hands around his waist and kissing his neck. Andrew shivered, but leaned against Neil’s front instead of pushing him away.

"You were thinking it,” Andrew said, his voice even. Neil hummed in agreement, smiling against his shoulder, and Andrew made an unimpressed noise at Neil’s joy.

“Can I come watch your training?” Neil asked, moving back so that Andrew could spin the chair and face him.

“You haven’t unpacked,” Andrew noted. Neil shrugged and looked down at his hands in front of him. He wasn’t sure he should unpack, Neil had three meetings with potential pro teams over the next week and a half and, apparently, he had more to come. In three months, he’d be moving to a new state and joining the circus that is pro-league press and eventually training.

“Maybe I shouldn’t…” Neil said. “Just, leave it in the boxes until I have to move.” Neil didn’t really like talking about it, but it was truth and truth is what Neil promised Andrew now. Neil felt a strange melancholy about moving in with Andrew temporarily. Aaron had moved to campus with Katelyn, Kevin and Thea had a place together in California, Nicky had skipped to Germany to be with Eric, and obviously Dan and Matt moved out together, as did Allison and Renee . Andrew and Neil didn’t get that luxury, they had to steal away for weekends and sneak off for a couple of hours after games. Even though Thea and Kevin played on different teams, they had their home. Neil knew that he had homes, the house in Columbia and Wymack and Abby’s place, but Neil had lost Palmetto State University the moment he graduated. Neil wanted nothing more than to stay home with Andrew, no matter how excited he was about going pro.

“You’re here for three months, I don’t want boxes in my room for that long.” Andrew sounded offhanded when he spoke, but Neil knew it was an invitation to make himself at home. Neil chewed on the inside of his lip and studied Andrew who was eyeing him back, waiting for Neil to respond. When he didn’t, unsure really what to do or say to the offer, Andrew huffed and leaned forward. “Three months, Josten. Just unpack and be here, until it is time to go. This isn’t forever, but us being in different states won’t be forever either. Just unpack your damn bags.”

“Okay,” Neil said, moving to stand between Andrew’s swinging legs and put his hands on his shoulders.  
“You’re at eye level now,” he said, smirking. Andrew looked up at the ceiling and put his hands on Neil’s waist.

“You infuriate me,” Andrew said. Neil grinned and peppered kisses across Andrew’s nose, forehead, and cheeks. Andrew tolerated it for a few moments before pushing Neil out of his space, leaving his hand on Neil’s chest for either physical contact or making sure that Neil stayed there. “You can come to training, Junkie.”

“Junkie?” Olivia asked from the doorway, startling them both. Andrew dropped his hand and looked at her over his shoulder. Neil rolled his eyes in response before making a gesture at Andrew to explain his longstanding nickname.

“He’s addicted to Exy, it’s disgusting,” Andrew answered simply. Neil laughed and leaned his hip on the countertop.

“Look, at one point he called me a racoon so…” he trailed off with a shrug.

“I did,” Andrew confirmed. “I’ve called him lots of things. ‘Idiot’ is another one that is appropriate more often than not.”

“Shut up Drew,” Neil said with no heat.

“I tried to call him that, after you left a couple months ago,” Olivia said conversationally, coming to stand on the other side of the kitchen counter.

“What, ‘Drew’?” Neil asked. She nodded, adjusting the belt around her waist. Neil realised he had been listening to Allison more than he thought because he could pinpoint that her dress was styled from the nineteen fifties. Neil smirked at her and raised his eyebrow, already knowing the answer before he asked. “How did that work out for you?”

“Well…” she looked at Andrew with a shake of her head that was equal parts fond and exasperated.

“I told her not to,” Andrew replied easily.

“He threatened me,” she corrected. Neil nodded because yep, that checked out.

“No one else calls me Junkie,” Neil said. “No one else calls him Drew. His cousin tried both and he nearly got a knife to the gut each time.”

“Oh, I believe that,” Olivia said with a laugh.

“Oh?”

“She has been privy to video calls with Nicky, she gets it,” Andrew said.

“Ah,” Neil said.

“Yeah,” Olivia said. “If you’re coming to training, we should get going soon,” she added. Andrew made a disgruntled noise and slid from the seat to the ground, back to his five feet nothing. Neil smiled and considered patting his head, but he figured that was a good way to lose the function of his wrist for a couple of weeks.

“Touch me and you die, Josten,” Andrew said. Neil shrugged and laughed, sharing an amused look with Olivia who stood an inch or two taller than Neil. Andrew walked off towards his bedroom, taking Neil’s duffel bag with him. Five years ago, if someone had touched Neil’s duffel, Neil would have gone feral, but watching Andrew walk off with it towards their room just made him feel safe. Neil scampered after him with his sports bag and dropped it on the floor inside the door and closed it behind him.

“Remember my first day in Fox Towers?” Neil asked. Andrew shot him a bored look, dropping the duffel on top of the boxes stacked in the corner. “Do you?” Neil pressed.

“I remember everything,” Andrew said, tapping his temples. “Apparently the eidetic memory is part of autism,” he added with a half-hearted shrug. Neil hadn’t looked that far into it when Andrew told him his diagnosis, but that made enough sense that Neil took it at face value.

“So eidetic memory aside, you do remember that first day?” Neil asked. Andrew gave him the look that said Neil was being particularly annoying, but Neil ignored it. “You went through my duffel and I went apeshit.” Neil gestured at the bag near Andrew’s shoulder.

“You used French to call Kevin a cripple,” Andrew said. Neil grinned, not necessarily feeling sheepish, but it wasn’t Neil’s finest moment.

“I did,” he said. “Did I ever tell you how I knew you’d gone through my stuff?” He asked. Andrew sat down on his bed and tilted his head at Neil, a tiny smile pulling at the corner of his mouth.

“The tags on your shirts,” Andrew said.

“So, I did tell you?” Neil asked, although he couldn’t remember saying it to him. Andrew’s smile grew a little bit more and he shook his head.

“No.” He raised his eyebrow as if in challenge and Neil felt his mouth drop open. “It’s been four years Neil, how have you not figured out that I don’t make mistakes?” He looked so quietly pleased with himself. Neil sighed and crossed the room to sit on his lap, winding his fingers in Andrew’s hair.

“You do make mistakes,” Neil said. “You chose the kid running from the Japanese Mafia, a lie from head to toe, who was going to die within a year. Sounds like a mistake to me.” Neil tried to keep his face serious, but Andrew held him tighter and wrinkled his nose as if Neil was a pest he didn’t want to deal with, and Neil pulled a face back at him.

“Yeah, well, I guess nobody’s perfect,” Andrew allowed. Neil scoffed and kissed the corner of his mouth.

“So how did you know about the tags? And why did you want me to know you’d snooped? I know you were checking up on me for Kevin or whatever, but why did I have to know?” Neil asked. Andrew groaned and put his forehead on Neil’s shoulder.

“I don’t know Neil, I was high as fuck on the stupid medication and I wanted to get under your skin,” he said. Neil hadn’t considered that. In fact, Neil hadn’t really thought all that much about the first six months of knowing each other and what it had been like for Andrew. “Also, eidetic memory, remember? I saw what you’d done to the tags, not like I could forget. And in foster care we had to write our names on the tags of everything, checking that is kind of ingrained in me.”

“When did you realise you liked me?” Neil asked. He’d never wondered before because it didn’t really matter, but hearing that Andrew had wanted to get his attention in one way or another so early on in their knowing each other had peaked his curiosity.

“It’s been over four years, why the interrogation now?” Andrew asked, lifting his head from Neil’s shoulder to peer up at him.

“Humour me,” Neil said. Andrew leaned back on his palms and let out a long-suffering sigh.

“All I ever do is humour you,” he said. Neil rolled his eyes and shifted position to be straddling his legs, hands flat on Andrew’s belly. “The first time I met you sober I knew you were going to be a problem, in more ways than one. From the fact that you dressed like a homeless person and owned literally nothing with your sketchy past, to the fact that underneath your homeless dress sense, you were hot. I wasn’t impressed.” As Andrew spoke, Neil processed those words and his eyes nearly bugged out of his head and he gripped Andrew’s shirt.

“The first time sober? Andrew that was the airport when you picked me up!” Neil squeaked before remembering that day in its entirety and frowning. “You were an asshole.”

“I am still an asshole,” Andrew said.

“Maybe, but that day in particular. You tried to trick me into thinking you were Aaron and cornered me in the elevator and…” Neil trailed off as Andrew waved a hand dismissively.

“Yes, we’ve well established I treated you like shit for a while there,” he said. “You weren’t exactly a piece of cake, or at all trustworthy. I was doing what I thought I needed to do, and in my opinion, it turned out fine.”

“You nearly killed me when we first met,” Neil said, putting one hand to his own stomach as he remembered the pain of the exy racquet slamming his intestines into his spine. Andrew lifted two fingers to his temple in his mocking salute Neil hadn’t seen in a while. Seeing it again sent a fluttery, weird in a good way, feeling to his stomach.

“Better luck next time,” Andrew said, leaning back on his hand.

“God, were you flirting with me?” Neil asked, eyes bugging again and a smile tugging at his mouth. He hadn’t thought much about that first year, with all the trauma he’d experienced it was easier just to forget, but some Andrew specific things were coming to the front of his memory. Andrew cocked his head to the side and made a rolling hand gesture for Neil to be more specific. When Neil couldn’t really form words, Andrew put his hand back down.

“When in particular?” He pressed. Neil tried to grab some particular memories and found a few.

“Okay, okay um… that night when I found you and Kevin at the stadium and he was practicing while you were in the seats. I said I wasn’t a math problem and you said-”

“’I’ll still solve you’,” Andrew finished. “Yeah I guess in a way I was flirting. I was sober because it was night-time, and I was making a point, I guess. I still didn’t trust you then, or even really like you past your pretty face, so there was no real intention behind it other than to be vaguely threatening.” Neil decided to let the ‘pretty face’ comment slide and find more examples of things Andrew said that Neil probably didn’t quite process appropriately at the time.

“The percentages?” Neil asked. Andrew looked disbelieving at that one and shook his head.

“Fucking wow,” he said. “Wow, okay, yes that is flirting and you’re only just realising this?” Neil shrugged with one shoulder. “You are fucking clueless and 250%.”

“Okay and when you called me a side effect, a pipe dream?” Neil asked. Andrew’s disbelieving look morphed into something that could have been mistaken for bored by anyone that wasn’t Neil.

“I remember that day, you looked like shit,” he said. Neil snorted, remembering how banged and beaten up he’d been after staying at Evermore. “Yeah, that was flirting in a way. More like a confession that went well and truly over your head.”

“Which is why you had to spell it out for me,” Neil said. Andrew laughed and pulled Neil down on top of him.

“Your inexperienced asexual ass had a lot to learn,” Andrew agreed. Neil felt the warmth of validation at Andrew reaffirming his sexuality and pressed an appreciative kiss to his nose in thanks. Neil hadn’t necessarily had a crisis over his sexuality because being with Andrew was the only thing that mattered or that he cared about, and it was as easy as breathing in so many ways. But at nineteen he had wanted to know why he didn’t find others attractive, why he really did stand by his ‘I don’t swing’ mentality. Finding the term ‘demisexual’ on one of his late-night internet trawls had been a sweet relief to his questions and when he’d shown Andrew later that week, his response had simply been ‘so, a spicy asexual? Sure, whatever works for you’ and that was the end of it.

“Well, I like to think I have learnt by now,” Neil said. Andrew ignored that and pushed Neil until he rolled off him.

“I’m getting changed for training, you ready to go?” He asked.

“Nearly,” Neil said, getting to his feet and sliding on his trainers. He put his keys in the pocket of Andrew’s black hoodie that he was wearing. He was still dressed from the long drive up from Palmetto to Chicago, in just frayed jeans and the hoodie, but it would be fine for spectating a closed training session. Andrew changed into loose fitting sweatpants and a Lions jersey before pushing his feet into his own trainers and finding his phone and keys on the bedside table. Andrew handed Neil his own phone, but Neil didn’t want to take it, so Andrew put it in his pocket.  
“Why? The only person I talk to often is you and you are with me,” Neil said. Andrew made a disgruntled noise and tightened his laces.

“Because trouble follows you like a plague,” he said. Neil opened his mouth to respond, but he didn’t get the chance.

“Hey lovebirds! They’re talking about Neil on the radio!” Olivia yelled. Neil and Andrew shared weary looks and left the room. In the living space, Olivia was perched on one of her high barstools in similar clothes to Andrew. The radio that sat in the corner of the room was on and tuned into a fairly popular sports-centric channel.

“ _He has definitely improved more than any individual player has improved in a long time_ ,” the guest on the show was saying. Neil recognised his voice from the few phone calls they’d had. He was the coach of the Portland Scorpions and one of the men Neil would be meeting with soon for a potential contract.

“Why is Coach Fierro talking about me?” Neil demanded.

“I don’t know, I heard your name and yelled,” Olivia answered, swinging around in her chair. Andrew shrugged to say he didn’t know either, but Neil hadn’t expected him to know.

“ _Is he a potential recruit for you going into next season?_ ” The host asked. Coach Fierro laughed chummily, more for show than to be genuine.

“ _I may or may not have a meeting booked with Josten soon, contracts might be discussed, you never know. I do know that I am not the only one lined up to meet with him,_ ” Coach Fierro said, trying too hard to sound inconspicuous.

“ _He is a bit of a spitfire though isn’t he_ ,” the host said.

“ _You know what they say about red-heads!_ ” Coach Fierro replied grandly. Neil hated him immediately. The host laughed like that was a brilliant joke and Neil seethed.

“ _So, this public rivalry that Josten has with former teammate Andrew Minyard hasn’t been a negative impact during this time of research and recruiting?_ ” The host asked. Neil sighed hard out of his nose and felt Andrew come closer in what was possibly a pre-emptive move in case Neil started to swing at the radio.

“ _No, of course not. It might do the spitfire some good to work his aggression off on the court! Might help him score a few goals against Minyard,_ ” the coach replied. Neil switched the radio off, lips pressed thin.

“If he calls me ‘spitfire’ one more time…”

“I’ll break his legs,” Andrew promised. Neil didn’t know if that was genuine or not and decided not to ask. Andrew waved his phone in the air, drawing Neil’s attention to it. “Minyard Josten Rivalry bait though,” he said. Neil shrugged, letting Andrew make the call and sat on the back of the couch as Andrew typed, the instigator smirk on his mouth.

“You done?” Neil asked when he slid his phone back to his pocket.

“Yes, let’s go,” Andrew said. They filed out of the apartment, Olivia locked it behind them and they piled into the Maserati with Neil in the passenger seat. While Andrew drove, Neil checked the new update from Andrew Minyard on Twitter.

_‘@portlandscorpions coach thinks @josten10 needs to channel his aggression out on the court, and that he can use that to score on me. I say he’s right about one thing, and it isn’t scoring.’_

Neil smiled, looking at Andrew out of the corner of his eye. Andrew didn’t look back, but he moved his hand off his own thigh when Neil moved to rest his hand there, so he was clearly paying some sort of attention.

“I can score with you whenever I want,” Neil teased. Andrew, probably wisely, chose to let that go without comment. Neil replied to the Tweet with a very simple, _‘@aminyard03 you are so full of shit. Watch me make you eat your words next season.’_


	11. "I Hate Your Mouth."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil signing on and moving up!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is the only thing bringing me joy atm omfg I hope you're enjoying it :')

“Here, read this,” Olivia said with a sly smirk. Neil reached over the countertop to take her phone from her and Andrew leaned over to see what it was. He didn’t trust the smirk, and he didn’t trust the dark blue on her screen that he had come to associate with Tumblr even less. It was a minefield of fans getting up in each other’s faces and going very deep into their analysis of Neil and Andrew’s lives. It seemed to Neil that on Twitter, as scary or persistent as the exy fans could be sometimes, it was like they knew there was the potential Neil or Andrew would see and so they were a little bit tamer. On Tumblr, the fans could go feral behind their URLs and anonymous ask boxes. Granted, Neil had been shown nice things from the fans, pieces of art that they’d drawn and collections of his greatest moments on the court. It only just balanced out the intensity of the other side of Tumblr.

“What is it?” Neil asked, looking up at her from under his eyelashes. Olivia’s eyes flashed with amusement and she shrugged with false innocence. She was wearing high waisted brown trousers, a tucked in white shirt and suspenders today, her lipstick was dark, and her eye makeup was smoky, she looked well and truly ready for her date. Andrew angled the phone so that he could read too so Neil looked back down at it.

 **Let-me-love-exy:** I am enjoying the Minyard/Josten Rivalry as much as the next person, but like my guys we do know it’s not real right? They’re literally friends, we’ve seen all the footage from Foxes era Andrew and Neil, we know they don’t hate each other.

 **Fuck3nlovefoxes:** Just because they were friends in college doesn’t mean they’re friends now man :’) Something happened and now they hate each other. My bet is they were both crushing on Robin Cross, but Neil won her #otp

 **Let-me-love-exy:** Have Neil and Robin been seen together since he graduated? No! We know they talk because Robin posts screenshots from facetime calls, but has Neil gone down to Palmetto to see her? Absolutely not. But Andrew used to go to Palmetto once a month, up until Neil graduated! Neither of them has gone back to PSU since Neil graduated lmfao Andrew was going there to see Neil and only Neil.

 **Andrewminyardisdaddy:** You’re delusional lol Neil doesn’t have a car and is trying to find a pro team he doesn’t have time to visit his gf but like whatever you do you :’)

 **Lionsroarforexy:** Andrew and Neil hate each other, just enjoy the melodrama like the rest of us haha

 **Let-me-love-exy:** Why do you all want them to hate each other so bad?

“Let me love exy is asking the good questions,” Neil said. “Why do they want us to hate each other?”

“It’s fun for them,” Andrew said.

“Of course, you’d think that, drama queen,” Neil teased. Andrew glowered at him, but Neil smiled sweetly and pushed Andrew’s hot cocoa closer to him. Andrew dropped his glare to drink it.

“I’ve got to hand it to you,” Olivia began. “You’ve convinced the entirety of the American exy fandom, and some international fans by the look of it, that you two hate each other with everything you’ve got and yet I don’t think I’ve seen a couple more in love.” The look on Olivia’s face suggested she knew she’d carefully placed a bomb on the counter with the ‘love’ statement, and was waiting to see what happened from a safe distance.

“Clearly we haven’t convinced the entirety, let me love exy has doubts,” Andrew said, not missing a beat. Neil smirked at Olivia, her bomb refusing to detonate. She rolled her eyes and took her phone from Neil’s loose grip.

“Sure, ignore what was important about that statement,” she said. Andrew flicked an impassive look up at her and took another mouthful of his drink. They kept patient eye contact until he’d swallowed.

“What was the important part of that statement?” He asked.

“That I don’t think I’ve seen a couple more in love,” she said, eyebrow raised. Neil looked at Andrew for his response and was not disappointed or unsurprised when it came.

“Then you don’t know many couples,” Andrew said dismissively. Neil laughed and when Andrew looked at him, he winked with his right eye so that Olivia wouldn’t see. Neil pulled a face at him in return and reached for Andrew’s drink to have a mouthful. Andrew was faster and moved it out of his reach. “Love or not, get your own fucking drink Josten.”

“Asshole,” Neil said. “I got to go anyway; I’ll be back on Monday.”

“Don’t die,” Andrew said.

“Motivational,” Neil quipped, sliding from his seat. Andrew turned the chair he was on a little to face Neil, his feet swinging.

“I can’t believe you’re signing with the Scorpions,” Olivia muttered. It was two and a half months after the radio interview where Coach Fierro called Neil ‘spitfire’, but the contract he’d offered Neil was the better of the other options. The money was good, which would keep the Moriyamas off his back, it was a one year contract with the potential to renew which meant Neil had the chance to find a team with Kevin, Matt or Andrew later, and it was only a four hour flight between the two cities. True, Portland was one of the furthest cities from Chicago, but it wasn’t going to be the end of the world.

“Well you better believe it because this weekend is a whirlwind of contract signing and training with the team,” Neil said. Andrew pulled Neil against him and kissed his mouth firmly. Neil leaned into his familiarity and kissed him back. “At least I don’t have to do any press until after the championships,” he said when he pulled back. Semi-finals were on Saturday, but the Scorpions had been knocked out in the previous round leaving the weekend available for recruiting their new members.

“If you were put in front of the press before the championships, you’d take all the attention away,” Andrew said, clearly not meaning it as a compliment.

“They said you’d grow out of your attitude problem way back in your freshman year,” Olivia said. “They were so wrong.”

“You have no idea,” Neil said with a mischievous grin.

“I hate your mouth,” Andrew said impassively. Neil kissed him again to prove him wrong before stepping away and gathering his keys, phone and slinging his duffel over his arm while Olivia said her goodbyes and left for her date with a bounce in her step.

“See you on Monday,” Neil murmured against Andrew’s mouth during the goodbye kiss. “And I promise I will watch your game on Saturday.”

“I know you will Junkie,” Andrew said, putting his hand on the back of Neil’s neck. “Stop feeling guilty that you won’t be here for it. It’s just a game.”

“I know,” Neil said. He wanted to argue, but he knew there was no point. To Andrew, the semi-finals his first year in the league was still just another game. It probably did mean more to Neil than it did to Andrew, but Neil’s throat threatened to close up as he thought about not being there when Andrew played. The fact that Kevin and Matt were also in the semi-finals that year weren’t helping Neil’s feeling of loss. The favourites for finals that year were the Tornadoes with Kevin against the Cougars with Matt, but Neil knew that there was a chance, a small chance, that Andrew would step up to the plate and shut down the goal against the Cougars. “How will you play on Saturday?” Neil asked. Andrew’s eyes sparked with interest.

“How I usually play,” he answered.

“So, bare minimum?” Neil asked. Andrew leaned back, keeping his hand on the back of Neil’s neck.

“This sounds like you’re going to offer me a bribe Josten,” he said casually. “Just like the good old days.”

“If you win this weekend, I will do anything,” Neil promised. Andrew’s lip curved in the small, cute, pleased smile only Neil ever got to see.

“I’ll hold you to that,” he warned.

“I know,” Neil assured him. “I really do have to go now.”

“Yeah, we do,” Andrew agreed, sliding from the chair.

“We?” Neil asked.

“I cancelled the Uber,” he said. “I’m driving.”

*

Neil didn’t get to check his phone again until he had landed in Portland and was waiting for the car sent by the Scorpions. His phone was overfilled with Instagram notifications and when he clicked onto the app he realised why. Just like Neil had Andrew’s socials logged into his phone, Neil was logged into Andrew’s phone too. Andrew hadn’t used them without permission, until now. The picture he’d posted was taken as Neil turned to say goodbye, half out of the car. The background was blurred lights from the airport and the slight drizzle, Neil had his old duffel over one shoulder, and he was looking past the camera at Andrew from under his eyelashes with a grin on his face. _‘Off to start playing with the big leagues #exy’._ Everyone wanted to know who had taken the picture, who made Neil smile like that, and they really wanted to know which team he was signing for. Neil ignored the comments, took a screenshot of the post and took to Twitter.   
_‘@aminyard03 one step closer to kicking your ass next season’._

He sent Andrew a text immediately after, ‘I’ve landed. I hadn’t even realised you were taking a picture. Talk tomorrow.’

‘Good. Talk tomorrow’ was Andrew’s reply. Neil pocketed his phone, grabbed his bag, and climbed into the car that would take him to his next adventure.


	12. "You're Not What I Expected."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil watches the semi-finals with his new team.  
> Andrew makes history.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to @legowerewolf here on AO3 for all your support and comments on the fic so far <3 It means a lot every time!!
> 
> Don't tell me Andrew couldn't do what he does in this fic because he definitely could.  
> Also I hope you all like Oscar!!

Even though the year was over for the Scorpions, the large team gathered again on Saturday morning to meet the new recruits after they’d signed their contracts. Neil couldn’t lie, the training session with the pro team and the two other new recruits was thrilling and terrifying, and more fun than Neil had predicted. For two hours Neil had nothing else to think about other than running himself into the ground on the immaculate Scorpion’s court. Neil had gotten so used to wanting a home with Andrew, he’d forgotten he had a home on the court too. This next year was going to be hard, but it was also going to be so much fun and Neil was ready to hit the ground running.  
“Holy fucking Christ on a stick, you are fast,” one of the established backliners said, coming up to Neil at the end of the training session. “Name’s Oscar.”

“Hi Oscar,” Neil said, grinning at the taller man as he took off his helmet. Oscar took his own helmet off, shaking out his shock of pale green hair. He was panting after having tried to keep up with Neil for over an hour of the training session.

“Fuck me man, that was intense,” he said.

“You did better than most at keeping up with me,” Neil said with a shrug. Oscar grinned back and shook his head, squirting Neil in the face with the water bottle. “Hey!” Neil yelled. Oscar laughed and squirted water into his own mouth.

“Welcome to the team man, glad to have you,” he said. Neil grabbed his own water bottle and felt something settle inside him. He may not be a Scorpion forever, but he was for now and that was good enough for him.

“Thanks, glad to be here,” Neil said. A phone ringing caught Neil’s attention, but it wasn’t his own ringtone and judging by the way Oscar lurched for his bag it was his.

“Hey babe!” He said spritely, bouncing on his toes with unconcealed happiness. “Yeah, it was great! Josten is faster than we thought,” he added in reply to the caller. Oscar winked at Neil and leaned against the wall.  
“I’ll ask don’t worry,” he assured the caller. “We’re going to watch the games so I won’t be home until after dinner, but if you want to come over tonight I am all for it.” He paused, listening to the caller and Neil realised he was staring and bent down over his bag, searching for his towel to wipe his face. “Okay babe, I will see you then, love you!” The phone call ended, and Oscar crouched down to be eyelevel with Neil over the bag.

“Yes?” Neil asked, raising his eyebrow.

“My boyfriend wants your autograph,” he said. Neil nearly choked on his saliva and blinked at Oscar. Nicky had said Neil’s gaydar was broken, but Neil hadn’t put stock in that until this very moment.

“You’re gay?” Neil asked. Oscar raised his eyebrows in quiet challenge.

“Bisexual, that a problem for you?” He asked. Neil was so surprised by the question he laughed, shaking his head.

“No, of course not. I was a Fox right, Allison and Renee are engaged; Nicky is engaged to a man too,” Neil reminded him. There was also his own same sex relationship, and Matt and Kevin were only out to their close friends, and then the group of people outside of the Foxes that Neil considered friends who were also queer; Jeremy, Jean, Laila and Grace, and even Olivia. Neil hadn’t ever pooled his friends into a group solely for their sexualities and he needed a moment to process that most of them were part of the LGBT+ community. Aaron, not that he considered Aaron a friend, and Dan were probably the only heterosexuals in his circles. He shook the thought from his head and refocused on Oscar. “I don’t care that you’re dating a guy,” he reassured him. “My ‘gaydar’ just needs to get fixed, apparently.” Neil shrugged and zipped his bag back up while Oscar laughed.

“So, will you sign something for my man?” Oscar asked. Neil didn’t know why someone would want his autograph; he hadn’t even played a pro game yet. A morbid thought popped into his mind and he winced.

“He’s not some like, true crime nerd, is he?” He asked. Oscar looked confused for a long moment before realisation dawned on his face and he shook his head rapidly.

“No!” He paused and seemed to reconsider, and Neil’s heart jumped with nerves and fear. “He is a true crime nerd, like serial killers and shit, but I know why you asked and that’s not it.”

“So, he doesn’t want the autograph from the Butcher or Baltimore’s son?” Neil scoffed, getting to his feet. Oscar followed him up and grabbed his shoulder, an urgent look on his face.

“No, that’s not it, I promise,” he said. “Jaiden adores the Foxes because of what you guys stand for. Overcoming trauma, broken homes, addiction, everything. He gets it, and the Foxes inspire him, all of you. He was abused in foster care in more ways than one, overcame addiction in his late teens, fought to come to terms with his sexuality, you know, all that good shit.” Oscar winced, realising he’d overshared in his desperation to be understood. Neil did understand now, at least enough, and he put his hand over Oscar’s and gently prised it from his shoulder.

“I’ll sign something, sure, but let me send it? I can print out a team picture from my sophomore year, send it to some of the others to sign.” Neil felt incredibly awkward and prayed he didn’t sound narcissistic for offering. Oscar’s face lit up though, which made Neil feel a little more resolved.

“You would do that? Man, that’s awesome, thank you!” He whooped. “I’m so winning best boyfriend award.” He looked so proud of himself that Neil decided not to bring up his own relationship status or compete for the best boyfriend award.

“Sure,” he allowed. “I’m going to shower and change out to watch the game,” he added, gesturing with his thumb at the showers. They were open, not stalls, and Neil had to take a very deep, steadying breath before he undressed. Some of the men stared at his scars, but not as many as he expected. The other new male recruit came and stood near Neil in the showers, his face a little pale and his hands shaking. He looked nervous and Neil supposed he was seeking solace with the other newbie.

“You good?” Neil asked, soap sloughing off his body. The other newbie jumped like Neil had shot him and he dropped his soap bar. Oscar grabbed it up and handed it back over without a second glance as he passed to his own shower head.

“I’m fine, yeah,” he answered. “I’m Dante,” he added.

“Neil Josten,” Neil replied.

“Yeah, I know,” he said. Neil didn’t react to that, he wouldn’t know how to. “I was on the North circuit so we never played together, but I watched your games when I could. The infamous Foxes and all.”

“We’re still infamous huh?” Neil said before burying his hair under the water. “I thought we’d gone past that by now.” Dante offered him a crooked grin and put his head under the water instead of replying.

“You still say ‘we’ when you talk about the Foxes,” Oscar noted from the other side of Dante. Neil turned his shower off and tied a towel around his waist.

“Once a Fox, always a Fox. You said it yourself Oscar, we’ve been through hell. The eight other Foxes I played with my freshman year are my family. I don’t play on their team anymore, but I’m still one of them,” he said. Dante and Oscar looked at him with more respect than he felt he probably deserved and Neil tried not to shrink awkwardly away.

“I like that,” Oscar said.

“You’re not what I expected,” Dante added. Neil didn’t think he wanted to know what Dante expected so he didn’t ask. Just went to the locker room and changed into his jeans and his favourite black hoodie that was technically Andrew’s. If Neil had to guess, he would say he’d successfully had this hoodie for two years, but he still considered it Andrew’s.

“Soup’s on!” Coach Fierro yelled from outside the locker rooms. Neil gathered up the last of his belongings and walked out with Dante and Oscar to the lounge where a huge TV was up on the wall and comfortable looking, overstuffed sofas and armchairs were around it in a loose semicircle. On a coffee table in the middle sprawled a ridiculous amount of food that the four girls from the team were already piling onto plates to take to their seats. The older two women had already claimed the new female recruit under their arms by the look of it.

“Man, this is team bonding I can get behind!” Oscar cheered, swooping in for the food.

“The games are being played and aired live back to back thanks to being held in different states, so start eating and make yourselves comfortable because we have three or so hours of game time and an hour of press and fluff to watch,” Coach Fierro said brightly. Neil put some sandwiches and cut fruit on his plate and sat down on the floor next to Oscar with Dante nervously settling down on the other side of him.

“Do you prefer watching the games with your team more than with your boyfriend?” Neil asked Oscar, crossing his legs and putting his plate on the floor in front of him.

“God yeah, Jaiden doesn’t actually like exy. He looked into it when we started dating and found the story of your Foxes. He only pays attention to games if the Foxes are playing, usually I watch the games on my own or he’ll read a book on the couch while I watch,” Oscar explained. Neil knew the feeling of having your boyfriend’s head on your lap, reading a book, while you watched a game. It was a warm, content feeling, just enjoying the other’s company.

“Doesn’t sound so bad,” Neil said. Oscar swallowed his mouthful of food and shook his head, smiling a private smile.

“It’s not bad at all,” he agreed. “But sometimes it’s fun to get hyped up with the team, especially for the big games like championships.” Neil could understand that, given the option, Neil would watch big games with Kevin sometimes because at least they could talk about the game and yell about the referees. Coach Fierro turned the TV on to the station just as Kevin’s team walked onto the court for drills. The room of Scorpions erupted in cheers of ‘Day! Day! Day!’ as Kevin scooped a ball up and started scoring against his own goalie.

“He’s your friend, yeah?” Dante asked. Neil smiled and put a strawberry in his mouth with a half shrug.

“I suppose so, I’m kind of stuck with him. We have bedrooms across the hall at his dad’s house so…” Neil said. Oscar and Dante both stared at him, mouths full of half chewed food. Neil frowned at them, chewing his own mouthful slowly. After he’d swallowed and neither had moved he pulled a face at them. “What?”

“You live with Kevin Day?” Oscar demanded. Neil snorted and had to try not to spray bits of fruit out of his mouth.

“No, he lives in San Diego and I’ve been crashing in Chicago,” Neil said. “Wymack and Kevin’s stepmom have bedrooms for us when we either needed a break from the dorms, or just whenever we’re in Carolina.”

“Fuck you have a cool life,” Oscar moaned. Neil was torn between agreeing and reminding the taller guy that he’d nearly had a panic attack because he thought Jaiden wanted his autograph for being the son of Nathan Wesninski. He reminded himself he’d left that part of his life behind years ago. He was Neil Josten, ex-captain of the Foxes, new recruit for the Portland Scorpions, most improved Striker in NCAA Class I exy, PSU graduate, boyfriend to Andrew Minyard, and he was a friend. A man with a family. A man with no need to run. He wasn’t a little boy anymore. He was a man who did indeed live a very cool life.

“Yeah, I do, don’t I?” He said, enjoying another mouthful of fresh fruit.

Watching the game with a room full of exy fans was not new, but the room had twice as many people as when Neil would watch with the Foxes and that in itself was new. Half the team yelled and cheered and waved their hands around as they watched the game, like Oscar, and the other half laughed at the antics of the boisterous ones and enjoyed the food. Neil was torn between the two, sometimes too busy chewing or laughing to get really involved, and sometimes it was his voice that rang through the room first in reaction to something onscreen. Kevin’s team, the Tornadoes, won by four points and Kevin sank to his knees in either exhaustion or relief to be on his way to the championship game his first year back as a professional. Neil quietly pulled his phone out of his pocket and sent Kevin a text message, chewing his lip to keep his smile in check. ‘Good game asshole, you deserve this. Now get off the ground!’ even though he knew Kevin wouldn’t see it until he’d already gotten up off the floor. He tapped on his texts with Andrew next, but a text didn’t seem like enough. He excused himself to Oscar and Dante and slipped out to the inner court, out of earshot of the celebrating team, and dialled Andrew’s number.

“What do you want?” Andrew answered.

“To wish you luck and tell you I’m watching,” Neil answered.

“I knew you would be,” he said. “I wasn’t able to watch, did Kevin…?” Andrew trailed off, clearly not wanting to seem curious. Neil knew him better than that and smiled, probably a similar private smile to the one Oscar had when he spoke about Jaiden.

“He won, scored in the last five seconds, but they were already winning. You’ll see him in the championship game,” Neil told him. Andrew huffed, but he was clearly at least a little bit relieved.

“Good,” Andrew said. It was that one word, as impassive and bored as he always sounded, that reminded Neil how deeply Andrew cared. How deeply he felt about the things and the people he chose to let into his life. He cared about Kevin and he wanted him to succeed just as badly as Neil did.

“Yeah, I thought so too,” Neil agreed. “You ready for your game?”

“Yes, don’t worry about me. It’s just another game Neil, I told you that,” he said. “How was your session with the Scorpions?” He asked. Neil was exasperated that he would ask about that when facing such an important game, but he also felt a small bubble of happiness at being reminded that he mattered to him. It was never something he doubted, but it was still nice to remember.

“It’s been good,” he said, knowing he sounded happy. “I’m going to like it here.”

“Good,” Andrew said. “Alright you royal pain in my ass, I got to go now. Talk later?” He asked. Neil smiled at the fact that Andrew could call him a pain in the ass and then make a phone call date.

“Talk then,” Neil agreed. “Hey handsome?”

“Yes?”

“Good luck.”

“Junkie.” Andrew sounded like he was smiling, and the call ended. Neil pocketed his phone and when he turned to go back inside, he let out a startled yell because Oscar was leaning in the doorway, arms crossed, and lips curled in a knowing smile.

“What’s his name?” He asked. Neil raised his eyebrow in challenge and didn’t answer the question. Oscar laughed and raised his hands in surrender. “No worries, I won’t pry, but it’s your friend in Chicago, right? The one you’re crashing with, hm?”

“Yeah,” Neil allowed.

“Is it a secret?” Oscar asked. Neil lifted his hand and tilted it from side to side.

“Not necessarily a secret so much as just not really public knowledge,” Neil answered.

“I get it man, I won’t tell a soul,” he promised.

“Thanks, that would be appreciated,” Neil said.

“I came looking for you because they mentioned you on TV, they’re doing the after game, postgame, whatever talk show bit and they said you were the most sought-after recruit,” Oscar said.

“I don’t really care,” Neil admitted, “but we should go.” Oscar moved aside and Neil followed him back into the lounge. Apparently, the two hosts were still talking about Neil and his reappearance in the midst of his new team didn’t go unnoticed.

“They’re rattling off your stats,” Harmony Lexington said from her place in the middle of the girls. Neil resisted the urge to say that he could hear perfectly well.

 _“It’s rumoured that he’s already signed with a pro team though!”_ The female host said, Neil’s stats disappearing from the screen. Neil’s new team cheered loudly at this and Neil sank down to the floor with Oscar and Dante.

 _“It’s not a rumour, Neil practically confirmed that himself on Instagram last night,”_ the male host said as a screenshot of Andrew’s sneaky post to Neil’s account came on the screen with the caption circled.

 _“What’s interesting about this is that instead of uploading the picture directly to Twitter as well as Instagram, Neil screenshot the picture with the original caption and reposted it to Twitter a couple of hours later,”_ the female host mused. Neil kept his gaze down on his hands in his lap, feeling everyone’s gaze on him.

 _“Purely to antagonise Andrew Minyard from the Chicago Lions,”_ the male said. Neil’s lips twitched with a smile and he kept his gaze down.

“What is it with you and Minyard, weren’t you two friends?” Harmony asked. Neil looked up at her and didn’t bother trying to hide his sly smile.

“Isn’t that the million-dollar question?” He asked. “It’s what everyone wants to know.”

“Seriously, I’ve seen the postgame stuff, you and Kevin always gravitated to Andrew’s goal and when either of you were on press duty, he took your helmet and gloves. I was at the banquets your freshman year kid, you and him were tight as you followed Kevin around like dogs. You were friends, what actually happened?” Harmony pressed. It was a cruel reminder that Harmony Lexington had been a Raven.

“Andrew and I aren’t friends and we never were friends. The only thing that changed from my sophomore year to now is that Andrew and I are in different states on different teams,” Neil said.

“Is the rivalry real?” Dante asked. Neil looked at him and shrugged with one shoulder.

“It’s whatever you want it to be, but we’re not pretending, we really do talk to each other like that,” Neil said. The team didn’t look impressed by all of Neil’s non-answers and when Neil looked at Coach Fierro, he saw the considering expression on his face.

“I’m not going to tell you to stop, it doesn’t bother me,” he said.

“You couldn’t stop me even if you wanted to,” Neil said. The team oohed like they were watching a wrestling match or something, but the Coach just nodded his head as if he’d gotten the answer to a question he hadn’t asked aloud.

 _“And here we have them folks, the teams are ready to warm up,”_ the male said excitedly, and the screen panned to the court as the team members went on for drills. Andrew walked on last, his racquet over his shoulder and his head held high. Neil could almost imagine the nonplussed look on his face as he walked to his goal.

“Who are you betting on?” Oscar asked. Neil groaned and put his head in his hands, why couldn’t he find a team that didn’t bet on everything?

“The Lions,” he said after a minute. “Matt has strengthened the defence line for the Cougars immeasurably, but if the Lion strikers do get through the line then the goalies aren’t strong enough to stop all of their attempts on goal.” Neil looked up when he’d finished speaking and realised he was, again, the centre of attention. He wished that would stop happening.

“Okay, but with Minyard playing the full game and his apathetic ass letting in goals as he feels fit, you can’t say that you really think the Lions will win,” Harmony said. Neil had known that Andrew would be playing the full game with the starting line goalie off with an injury but hearing someone criticise Andrew made Neil’s blood boil. He couldn’t lose it in front of his new team, that wouldn’t help, especially when he thought he might be finding his footing there, so he swallowed down his annoyance.

“My money is on the Lions, I guess we’ll see,” Neil said. He had offered Andrew ‘anything’ just like his old-time bribe and although he didn’t know what Andrew was going to ask for, he was looking forward to seeing what it would be. In return, he knew Andrew was going to pull out all the stops and Neil was quietly looking forward to seeing Harmony eat her words.

“It doesn’t look like Minyard is changing his ways anytime soon,” Oscar said, nodding at the TV. Neil looked at the warm-ups and saw Andrew was swinging his racquet around with no rhyme or reason as his team’s balls flew into the goal and the lines flared red repeatedly. It looked like he was just stretching out and getting comfortable with the racquet, but to anyone who wasn’t Neil, it would look like he was goofing off. Neil didn’t say anything to his team in response to that and soon enough everyone broke out into smaller conversations as the teams sorted themselves onscreen.  
Finally, the teams lined up outside the court as their names were announced and filed back onto the court to start the game. Neil felt pressure behind his chest, almost like he was holding his breath even though he wasn’t, as he watched Andrew walk back to his goal to play his last elimination game before the finals. The Cougar’s dealer served the ball and the game began, the Scorpions in the lounge broke out in cheers for the teams they’d chosen to support for the evening. Neil watched as the ball bounced around at a scarily fast pace towards Andrew. Neil saw the minute Andrew got his head in the game. His shoulders squared, he gripped his racquet in both his hands and Neil knew he would have laser focus vision on the ball. Neil did hold his breath as the ball sailed directly towards the goals from a savagely fast and brutally forceful throw by a Cougar striker. The Scorpions were jeering and cheering, and then fell dead silent. Andrew moved lightning quick, snatched the ball and threw it directly down the court so hard it rebounded off the away goal and the line flashed red. Andrew, from his position in the home goal, scored a point for the Chicago Lions. Neil’s mouth was hanging open, as was everyone’s, and holy fuck Neil wanted to reach through the screen and kiss Andrew until his mouth went numb. The players on the screen were frozen, the timer was ticking, the commentators were silent, and Andrew was leaning on his racquet as if he hadn’t just made history. If Neil knew Andrew could do that, Neil may have proposed to him. Matt was the first to recover. He burst out laughing, took his helmet off and pointed his racquet directly at Andrew, shaking his head. He started speaking and the commentators snapped to life to repeat what he was saying to the audience who couldn’t hear him at home.

 _“Matt Boyd is yelling at Andrew Minyard, asking why he hadn’t done that when they were Foxes,”_ the female said.

 _“Boyd is clearly loving it, I think it’s safe to assume he’s at least a little bit proud of his former teammate for making history,_ ” the man added.

 _“You’re right Milo, in the history of exy, no goalie has scored from his or her position in goal,”_ the girl agreed. Neil closed his mouth.

“Holy fuck,” Neil said, breaking the silence in the room. Then he too burst into laughter like Matt and slapped his hand over his mouth. The Scorpions all looked at him with wide eyes and Neil shrugged, trying to calm his laughter. “I guess I put my money on the right team,” he said to Harmony. She gave a reluctant nod, looking bewildered, and turned her attention back to the screen where the coaches and the team captains were rallying their teams back to the game because the clock hadn’t stopped ticking down. Olivia, the Lion’s dealer, got the ball from Matt and before she served, she turned back to face Andrew.

 _“Olivia Howard just told Andrew Minyard that she loved him,”_ the female announced, making a soft aw sound.

“They’re so cute,” a Scorpion observed as Olivia served.

“How anyone could love Minyard is beyond me,” Harmony said. Neil closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“What?” Oscar asked from beside Neil. He went to answer, but when he opened his eyes, he saw that Oscar was talking to Harmony.

“Well come on, we know what he’s been through, we all saw the stories and what he’s done. He was on court ordered medication for being violent and psychopathic, you really think he’s loveable?” Harmony sneered.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Neil said.

“What would you know? You don’t even like him, you should agree with me,” she said haughtily.

“I don’t agree with you,” he said. “Andrew also doesn’t care what you think of him, so say whatever you want. You don’t know him.” Neil had to remind himself that he wasn’t there to fight Andrew’s battles, that Andrew really wouldn’t give a fuck about what they were saying about him.

“We all know he’s soulless, it was all over the papers in college,” Harmony grumbled. Neil remembered sitting on the roof with Andrew after their first kiss, saying he would have to fight the next person who called Andrew soulless. Neil had been in the middle of a meltdown at the time and Andrew’s kiss and distraction had helped him come back down to earth for enough time to realise Andrew was not a psychopath or a sociopath, but that he cared and he loved and he wanted and needed like everyone else, he just didn’t let himself feel it. He felt it for Neil.

“Andrew Minyard isn’t soulless.” Neil knew he sounded dangerous, but that didn’t matter. “You might think I hate him, you might believe what you’ve seen online, but I have known Andrew for five years and if I ever hear you say something as fucked up as that again, I will lose it.” Neil took a deep breath. “You might remember that Andrew isn’t the only one who was in the papers, you know who I am too,” he reminded her. Harmony licked her lips and nodded slowly, re-evaluating her word choices.

“Your loyalty is whack, you hate the guy, but defend him to your new team.” She shook her head. “Whatever Josten.” Neil looked around at his new team and saw that most people, even if they shared Harmony’s views, didn’t begrudge Neil. In fact, he saw an interesting amount of respect for him, which he appreciated.

It was nearly the end of the first half when he felt Oscar, who had been unusually quiet for the game compared to Kevin’s, freeze and stare hard at Neil.  
“Minyard plays for the Chicago Lions,” he whispered, so quiet no one else would hear him.

“Yes,” Neil confirmed, equally as quiet.

“You’re crashing with him in Chicago,” he said. Neil realised Oscar had spent the entire forty-five minutes trying to piece together the puzzle.

“I am.”

“Oh my fucking God,” he said. Neil tilted his face to look at him and shrugged with one shoulder. “You and Minyard?”

“Yep,” Neil said. “Still not public knowledge,” he added.

“Swear on my life, but can I tell Jaiden?” He whispered.

“That’s fine,” Neil agreed, because it was. He knew Andrew wouldn’t care either, neither of them had ever felt the need to broadcast their relationship, but they didn’t really care about hiding it either. It was just more interesting to let it play out without much input from them.

“That’s pretty cool man, how long?” Oscar asked.

“Over four years, end of my freshman year,” he said. Oscar’s eyes nearly bugged out of his head.

“Four fucking years this has been a secret, how did you do that?” Oscar asked. Neil shrugged. He really didn’t have any idea.

“It helps that people think we have a rivalry,” Neil said. Oscar muffled a laugh and nodded his head. “Although, technically I would say we do have a rivalry, but it’s fun for us. It’s not malicious.”

“That’s so fair,” Oscar agreed. “But like, four years and you’re in your mid-twenties, how aren’t you married?” Oscar poked him in the ribs. Neil wasn’t about to admit that he’d actually had the word ‘propose’ in his head when Andrew scored that goal.

“Strangely enough, not the first person to say something like that recently,” Neil said, remembering Allison’s comment at Andrew’s twenty-fourth birthday. “Do we strike you as the marrying type?”

“No, I guess not,” Oscar said, but he didn’t sound convinced. “Are you the reason he’s playing like he actually gives a shit tonight?”

“Yeah, absolutely,” Neil confirmed.

“Can you make sure you don’t do whatever it is you’ve done before we go against him?” Oscar asked. Neil wasn’t sure that made sense, but he kind of understood the question.

“When Andrew and I go toe to toe on the court for the first time as rivals,” Neil began with a rueful smile, “I won’t have to do anything for him to play like this. He will just do it, and I know this because I haven’t been able to score against him in five years and that won’t change now.”

“That’s rough man,” Oscar said. Neil grinned.

“It’s fun.”

“This rivalry is foreplay,” Oscar teased. Neil chose to ignore that and turned back to the game as the cameras zoomed in on the teams walking back on for the second half, hiding his smile behind his drink bottle.


	13. "I Love You Too."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew is super freakin' tired and misses his boyfriend.  
> He is also secretly proud of himself for the events of the last chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super short chapter, dw I will be posting chapter 14 straight after for you all <3

Andrew was supposed to be partying with his team, celebrating their win and the fact that they are moving onto finals, but he was so exhausted from playing the entire game without a break, and actually giving it his all, that he went directly home and fell into his bed. He barely had time to put his pyjamas on before he was burrowing into his pillows. He slapped around for his phone until he found it and stared blearily at it without his glasses. He had a scary amount of text messages from all of the old Foxes and Robin and three missed calls from Kevin. He listened to the only voicemail Kevin left and was too tired to hide his smile.  
“You fucking asshole how long have you been able to do that oh my god you are an exy legend and my best fucking friend you fucking asshole I am so proud!” He didn’t take a breath, was clearly tipsy, and overly excited, but Andrew appreciated the sentiment a little bit. Before Andrew could even consider calling him back, a Twitter notification came up from Neil. _‘@aminyard03 okay I got to admit that you played a good game. Nice goal you absolute asshole.’_ Andrew pressed the heart button and immediately his phone started ringing.

“Hey baby,” Andrew mumbled sleepily.

“Five years and you still manage to surprise me,” he said. Andrew huffed a laugh and rolled onto his side, pulling Neil’s pillow to his chest.

“Calling you baby or the goal?” Andrew asked.

“Both if I’m honest,” he said. “I’m a fan of both.” Andrew made a noise that even he wasn’t sure was appreciation or indifference.

“What are you doing?” He asked.

“New teammate is taking me back to my hotel,” Neil answered. “I think he’s about to combust with excitement that you’re on the phone.”

“He has poor taste,” Andrew decided. Neil laughed and reiterated that message to the driver. “He knows?”

“He does, he overheard our phone conversation and ended up piecing it together,” Neil answered.

“Good for him,” Andrew said, his eyes unable to stay open. “I’m going to fall asleep.”

“Think you can hold on until I get to my room? We just pulled up,” Neil said. Andrew mumbled a yes, listened to Neil say goodbye to this Oscar dude, and then Neil was talking animatedly, clearly trying to keep Andrew awake. “The training session was so much fun; I swear it’s like after months of not playing I had forgotten where I belonged. Drew, I am so excited to start playing next season, I don’t know what to think.”

“Your brain goes to exy so quickly,” Andrew slurred.

“Look, I know three things well. I can either talk about math, exy or you, and I think exy is the better option,” Neil teased. Andrew liked that Neil considered him a topic he knew well.

“Maybe,” Andrew allowed. “Room?”

“Unlocking the door now,” Neil promised. Andrew curled up a little smaller and held the phone as close to his face as possible. He’d never been on the phone this exhausted before, he felt drunk on exhaustion. “Alright, I’m in my room,” Neil said. There was a door closing, a drop of his bag, and then some scuffling and shuffling. “I am in bed!” He sounded triumphant.

“I scored a goal today,” Andrew whispered, just wanting to say the words aloud. He never thought he’d be able to.

“You did, and I am pretty sure I died when you did. My chin was on the floor. I wanted to reach through the screen and kiss you until my lips went numb. God, if I’d known you could do that, I would have…” Neil trailed off as if his own thought process embarrassed him. “You’re amazing Drew,” he whispered. Andrew felt sleep pulling him under, deeper, and deeper and deeper. Andrew would blame that if anyone ever asked him about what he said next.

“I love you, Neil,” he mumbled. There was a long, stunned silence and Andrew’s body started to try and amp up its adrenaline to go into panic mode, but he didn’t have the strength.

“I know, Drew,” Neil said. “I love you too.”

Andrew felt his body sink into relief, and he fell asleep before he could reply, the phone in his hand.


	14. "It's Too Early For Flirting."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have some morning Andreil ft sexy times

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature scene, you all have been warned idk what to tell you.   
> Next up, championships and party!

Neil came back to Chicago on Monday to spend a few more weeks with Andrew before he had to move to Portland for pre-season with his new team. That was all well and fine, except for the fact that Andrew remained trending on Twitter for the entire week and at one point he threw his phone across the room and told Neil, who’d caught the phone in mid-air, that he would never make that shot again. Neil had tossed the phone onto the bed, made a noncommittal sound and went back to changing his clothes. The only thing that knocked Andrew from the top spot trending happened on Sunday, the day of the championships. The Tornadoes had beaten the Cougars in both games they played against each other that season, and nobody seemed to have much faith that the outcome would be different during the finals, Andrew included.   
Andrew clicked out of Twitter and onto YouTube instead and looked through his recommended videos until he found one that looked vaguely interesting. _10 Minutes of Neil Josten Destroying Kevin Day’s Life_. Andrew turned his phone horizontal and pressed play on the video and as it started making noise, Neil stirred, but didn’t wake. When Andrew had woken up and stretched, Neil had woken up just enough to roll onto Andrew’s bare chest and fall directly back to sleep. Andrew held the phone over Neil instead of resting it on him and ran his fingers up and down Neil’s bare back, his spine knobbly under his fingertips. Neil stirred again, his hands curling into fists against Andrew’s sides, his drool slicked lips parting against Andrew’s skin and he made a soft, whining noise. Andrew buried his hand in the soft, curly tangles at the back of Neil’s head, one of Andrew’s favourite feelings against his skin, and readjusted the phone in his other hand. Onscreen, Neil was smarting off to the press while Kevin buried his head in his hands in defeat.   
“Waking up and hearing my own voice is a head-fuck,” Neil mumbled into Andrew’s chest. Andrew switched the screen off and put the phone on the bedside table before wrapping his arm around Neil’s shoulders, massaging Neil’s head.

“Good morning,” he murmured. Neil made a content snuffling noise and pried his eyes open to look up at Andrew. His blue eyes were still bleary, but he smiled sappily, and Andrew took his hand out of Neil’s hair and put them over Neil’s eyes. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“It’s too early for flirting Drew,” Neil said. Andrew huffed and uncovered Neil’s eyes and let him look at him with that dopey expression on his face. It’s the same look Neil had given Andrew on numerous occasions over the years and he would never be used to it. The first time, perhaps, had been the day on the roof when they’d kissed for the first time. Neil had been so lost back then and he’d looked at Andrew like he would answer all of his questions. It had been too much for Andrew, driven him past his own precautions until he’d kissed him. Neil had looked at him like that on the bus to Maryland too, and it was because of that expression that Andrew had returned Neil’s life story with his own. Over time, Andrew had been able to resist the urge to spill his soul out his mouth when Neil looked at him like that, but it still fought against his resolve.

“I hate you,” Andrew said. Neil pressed a kiss to Andrew’s chest before sliding up his body and kissing Andrew’s mouth.

“I said it was too early for flirting,” he murmured.

“Shut up, Josten,” he replied, holding onto Neil tighter and pressing their lips together again. Neil opened his mouth to say something and Andrew bit down on his bottom lip in warning. Neil smiled and slung his leg over Andrew’s waist to straddle him. Andrew slid his hands down his sides until he reached Neil’s bare thighs, squeezing gently. Neil responded by kissing Andrew deeper, pushing him further against the pillows. Neil pulled back abruptly, and Andrew followed him up for a moment before realising what he was doing and falling back against the pillows. Andrew knew that look, it wasn’t the sappy look, it was his shit eating grin that said, ‘I am about to ruin your day’. Well, that’s how Andrew read it, although he knew it was probably more like Neil was about to read Andrew better than he wanted to be read and he wouldn’t stop thinking about it all day.

“Was it the video of me being a bastard that turned you on?” Neil asked, his hands on Andrew’s chest keeping him down. Andrew bit down on his own tongue, hard, and glared up at Neil. “Don’t look at me like that, it’s not a secret that you like my mouth.”

“Nothing about us is normal,” Andrew noted. “Can’t even dirty talk like normal people.”

“Who wants to be normal,” Neil asked, sliding his hands up Andrew’s chest into his hair and following it through for a kiss. Andrew tilted his head to meet him, but at the last moment, Neil dodged and smirked down at him. Andrew’s hands tightened reflexively in frustration on Neil’s thighs. “You like it when I read someone to filth,” Neil whispered. “When I tear into a reporter, when I challenge you on Twitter.” Neil started placing kisses down Andrew’s throat and Andrew’s body shivered in response.

“Stop talking,” Andrew growled, but Neil bit down on his neck and his words melted into an aborted moan.

“No, I don’t think I will stop talking,” Neil said against his skin. “I think I’m going to let my mouth get me into trouble,” he mused. Andrew’s body betrayed him, and his hips jerked up to try and get purchase against Neil. “I think it’s working.”

“You’re a menace,” Andrew said. Neil would know that the minute he relinquished his grip on Andrew that he would take control so he kept his hands on him and kissed languidly down his body, murmuring curses and challenges into his skin as Andrew tried in vain to keep control over his reactions. It took all of Andrew’s quickly fraying concentration to stop his breath from hitching and swallow his moans as Neil swallowed him.

*

Neil looked up at Andrew with a satisfied grin and Andrew stared back, regaining some control, and letting his heart find its sinus rhythm.   
“Good start to your championship,” Neil mused, catching his breath quicker than Andrew.

“Fuck you and your mouth,” Andrew said, but he didn’t feel annoyed. He felt calm, relaxed, and very content as he climbed off Neil and reached for his towel.

“You did,” Neil quipped, following Andrew from the bed. Andrew, who had just gained control of his breathing, felt his breath hitch at his words.

“My God, Neil, shut your damn mouth and get in the shower,” Andrew groaned, throwing Neil the towel. Neil looked proud of himself as he danced around the room, collecting a change of clothes, and hooking his towel around his waist. Andrew watched him go, a deep feeling of comfort settling around him. Andrew could remember being small, afraid, and lost in life. Always on the edge, his guard always up, never comfortable, his sense of safety coming in secluded, fleeting moments. Then the medication fogging everything, distorting his perception, and understanding, never feeling settled or calm. The moments of sobriety clouded by withdrawal were relieving, but that never stopped his analysing or preparedness for a fight or confrontation.

“You coming, handsome?” Neil asked from the doorway. Andrew crossed the room to him and wrapped his arms around Neil tightly, a lump in his throat. Neil froze in his arm, clearly not sure what to make of Andrew’s abrupt show of affection, but after a moment he put his arms around his waist under Andrew’s arms and Andrew felt Neil press a kiss to his shoulder. Andrew’s life was not what he’d expected, and he’d meant it when he’d said he hadn’t expected to make it to twenty-four, but he was grateful to be here now. That was such a bizarre feeling, to be grateful solely for being alive. Andrew pulled back and put his hand on Neil’s cheek, his thumb tracing the circular scar under his eye. Neil turned his face to kiss his palm and took Andrew’s hand in his. “Let’s go shower, you got shit to do today,” he said. Andrew nodded and let Neil drag him to the bathroom.


	15. "You Said No."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew gets drunk oop

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of your comments are bringing me so much joy, thank you so much to all of you who are commenting and giving me kudos and all around being wonderful, supportive human beings!!!
> 
> I had no power today and so I hand wrote chapter 26 and will have to type it out later that is how committed I am to this story :') 
> 
> I have also started a Highschool Andreil AU I am thinking of finishing after this, if you guys would be interested in that let me know?? 
> 
> Thank you always to Nora, my beta reader, for being wonderful. You guys have her to thank for keeping me on track! (Like for real, I sent her 75k word dump yesterday and she sent it back a couple hours later so like, go team!)

Andrew got into place in the inner court at the back of the starting line-up, his racquet over his shoulder. He wasn’t worried about playing in the championships, but he was able to admit to himself that he was a little worried about the fact that he couldn’t see Neil when he’d been on the court for warmups. Andrew had had to leave early to get to the court with Olivia, and Neil had said he was good to get his own way there, but the old fear that he’d get himself hurt or killed snuck into Andrew’s gut when he couldn’t see him. Judging from Kevin’s furtive glances around the stadium on the other side of the court, he couldn’t see him either.   
Each of the team’s names and numbers were called and Andrew bounced the butt of his racquet off the floor at his own name before putting it back on his shoulder.   
“Make me proud Lions!” Coach Miles roared, opening the court doors and letting the Lions file on at the same time the Tornadoes did. Andrew and Kevin hadn’t had a chance to meet eye to eye during the warmups, but as they walked onto the court, Kevin passed his starting spot to meet Andrew in the very middle. Andrew walked over and just as he was about to ask if he knew where Neil was, the big screens above the court zoomed in on the audience and Andrew’s worry melted away. The screens were all broadcasting a group of people directly behind Andrew’s home goal. Neil sat in a row with Robin, Carter, Aaron and Katelyn. In front of them sat Laila Dermott, Grace Alvarez, Jean Moreau and Jeremy Knox. Behind Neil sat Renee, Allison, Dan and Matt. Robin, Aaron, Katelyn, Renee, Laila, Grace and Dan had Chicago Lion’s jerseys on, while Carter, Jean, Jeremy and Allison had Tornadoes jerseys. Neil, smack bang in the middle of the group, had on a tee shirt Andrew hadn’t seen yet that was both yellow and blue, the two colours of the two teams.

“They’re such idiots,” Andrew muttered. Kevin undid his helmet and pulled it off and after a moment Andrew followed suit. The group in the stands realised that the cheering was also for them and looked at the screens. Andrew watched as the Foxes, past and present, all raised their right hands in unison. Not in fists of triumph, but like students asking for attention. On their wrists they all wore thick, bright orange bands. A quiet, but grand reminder that no matter which team won that day, the Foxes had made it. The misfits, the ruined and rejects, tragic and traumatised, the battered and broken. The team that had been laughed at, written off and shunned. They were there, at the Championships, and no matter which team took the trophy, the Foxes were there.   
The stadium erupted and roared with cheers at the orange bands. Andrew made eye contact with Neil in the stadium and he waved his hand that was held aloft, eyes sparkling with pride and happiness. Andrew had to look away and so he looked at Kevin who saw his movement and looked back. Andrew quirked his eyebrow in silent question and Kevin nodded, smiling broadly. They raised their right hands together and faced their friends and family in the stands, Andrew albeit reluctantly, and the stadium went feral.

“Let’s go, Minyard!” Captain Rossen yelled, but he was smiling through his helmet.

“You too, Day!” The Tornadoes captain called. Kevin and Andrew put their helmets back on, smacked their sticks together and moved to their starting positions. Without thinking, Andrew stood ready to play. No stick swinging, no leaning, he stood square with his hands on his racquet and his eyes on the ball. Andrew wanted to play the game for himself, for the first time in his life. Not because he was being bribed or bargained with, not because it was fun saying no to Kevin, and not because it was a slightly bigger cage than the cell of his life like it had been in juvie. His life wasn’t reduced to a tiny, traumatised shell anymore. Andrew wanted to play the game, and he wanted to win. He wasn’t exactly expecting to do so, but God, he wanted to try.

*

Andrew collapsed to his knees at the end of the game, his knees and shoulders shaking with exertion from playing the entire game in the goal against Kevin Day and his roster of pro-strikers. He’d run himself into the ground, shot for fucking shot and they lost by two points at two to four. It was the lowest scoring game Andrew had ever played, but it was also the hardest, and for a split second, as he knelt on the court with his racquet at his side, Andrew understood why Neil and Kevin spoke about the satisfaction in the pain after a good game. That thought was fleeting, and he was again annoyed at being in pain, staring at the court and catching his breath. He was vaguely aware of the Tornadoes celebrating in the background, the Lions consoling each other, and the fans were losing their minds, but Andrew shut it out for his own state of mind. A pair of court shoes came into his line of sight and Andrew’s first thought was Olivia had come to pick him up off the floor, but he recognised those shoes and they weren’t Olivia’s. He looked up and Kevin put his hand out for him. Andrew looked at it before flicking his gaze up to his face, his stomach tight with mixed emotions. Kevin was beaming, but not just with the excitement of winning, there was something else there, something akin to understanding. He’d seen it in the way Andrew had played that night, he’d seen that there was something different.   
“If you say, ‘I told you so’, I’ll stab you,” Andrew warned him.

“I wasn’t going to,” he promised. Andrew narrowed his eyes up at him and Kevin laughed. “I wasn’t, don’t worry.” He would have had at least a small right to say it, he’d been the one to tell Andrew that he would find something worth believing in and trying for, living and fighting for. He’d been right.

“What do you want?” Andrew asked, taking off his helmet like Kevin had already had.

“I was going to ask if you were having fun yet?” He asked. Andrew rolled his eyes before closing them to face the memory of the last time he’d been on his knees on the court, exhausted and in pain and Kevin had asked him the same thing.

“You are a horrible person, Kevin Day,” he said. He let Kevin haul him to his feet while the taller man laughed. “The last time you asked me that, I nearly threw up on your shoes.”

“What about this time?” Kevin asked.

“I still might,” Andrew told him. Kevin snorted and bumped his hip against Andrew’s.

“Good game, Andrew,” he said.

“You too, Kev,” Andrew agreed. He had his breathing and his heart rate back in control and he straightened up and offered Kevin the smallest of smiles. “Go celebrate with your team, I’m good.”

“You know, I think I finally believe that,” Kevin said, his voice sincere. An arm snaked around Andrew’s shoulder and if the girl it belonged to hadn’t been ready for his violent reaction, he would have elbowed her in the stomach.

“Easy, Andrew, just me,” Olivia said, squeezing his shoulders just a little tighter. “Off you hop Mr. Day, I got him for now.”

“Hey Livia,” Kevin said. “See you both later?” Kevin asked. They nodded their heads and Kevin jogged off to join his triumphant teammates. Andrew put his arm around Olivia’s waist, his helmet and racquet in his hands, and they walked to where the Lions were amassing on the half court line for the congratulations and trophy presentation. Andrew and Olivia stood together, arms around each other, and when the cheers and stick smacking was over, he looked over his shoulder to see the group behind his goal in the stands. They were all there, part of the cheering and screaming crowd, all on their feet as they watched. Neil and Robin had their hands clasped in the air as they screamed and laughed and when Neil saw him looking, he put two fingers to his temple in Andrew’s salute and winked. _Better luck next time._ Andrew held his middle finger up at him and Neil grinned. Such a pretty face. Asshole.

“You good?” Olivia asked.

“For the goalie of the losing team, I’m fine,” he said.

“You played scarily well,” Olivia said dismissively. Andrew didn’t respond with words, but he squeezed her waist a little tighter and she hugged him back.

“Hey Minyard!” Captain Rossen said as the teams dispersed to change out and face the press. Andrew let Olivia go and nodded for her to go on without him and then turned to face the captain of his team. Alex stood in front of him and held his hand out which Andrew reluctantly shook. “I hope you like being a Lion,” Alex said. “Because we never want you to leave.” He looked so sincere and the words took Andrew aback a little bit. He wasn’t used to being wanted, being claimed. The Foxes had barely tolerated him, his family was stuck with him, and Neil was an anomaly. He hadn’t expected this, and he didn’t know what to do with it. 

“I have no plans to move,” Andrew said carefully. Alex smiled and let his hand go.

“Good, now change out, I heard you were invited to the Tornadoes’ after party,” he said. Andrew went away without another word and did just that.

*

When Andrew left the locker room, his team was in the lounge talking and milling around as usual, but there was one very specific difference to the usual postgame setup. Neil was leaning against the wall talking to Olivia.   
“You aren’t a Lion,” Andrew said from the doorway. Every single person in the room looked his way and Andrew realised some of them were expecting a fight. “How are you even in here?”

“Livia let me in,” Neil answered.

“Guilty,” she agreed. “But everyone else had to wait outside, there’s not enough room in here. Neil’s small, he doesn’t count.”

“Hey!” Neil protested.

“She’s not wrong,” Andrew pointed out. “Why are you in here?”

“I wanted to be,” Neil answered. “Besides, aren’t I yours and Livia’s ride to the party?”

“Yes, but you didn’t need to come in here,” Andrew said. Neil shrugged with one shoulder.

“Get over it, Andrew,” Neil said. Andrew snorted and turned his attention back to his team.

“Are we waiting for anything?” He asked. Alex Rossen shook his head slowly after his gaze darted furtively between Neil and Andrew.

“Nope, we’re just hanging out. Your squad can head out,” he said.

“You hear that?” Neil asked, his voice full of amusement and Andrew flicked him an impatient look. “He thinks I’m part of your squad.” He smiled a cheesy grin and Andrew looked at the ceiling, taking a deep breath so he didn’t go and slap or kiss him.

“More like major pain in my ass,” he said. Olivia laughed and ruffled Neil’s hair, which was usually a sure way to lose your fingers, but Neil must have liked her more than Andrew had realised. Matt, Kevin and Allison were the only other people who were allowed to do that, which probably suggested he considered Olivia to be like an older sister.

“So fucking rude,” Neil said. “Are we going? Jeremy, Renee, and I are driving.”

“You’re driving?” Olivia asked. “You don’t have a car.” She must have realised the three of them were the centre of attention still because she blushed and looked around the room. “Sorry, we’ll head out, my cousin’s waiting,” she said. Most of the team called out goodbyes and compliments for the game, and well wishes for the post season break. Andrew followed Olivia and Neil out of the room and Neil turned on his heel, walking backwards, his hand held out expectantly.

“Where are your keys?” Andrew asked him.

“In my bag, in the car,” he answered. Andrew rolled his eyes and dug around in his bag for his keys.

“Why would you lock your keys in the car?” He demanded. “What if I’d left mine in the car thinking you’d have your copy?”

“You wouldn’t do something stupid like that, which gives me leeway to do the stupid thing,” Neil answered easily, waving his hand.

“What use are they locked in the car? Having a second set of keys is supposed to be useful when you lose the first set,” Andrew reminded him, not that he was actually annoyed. It was just good fun poking holes in Neil’s logic.

“Sure, and that’s real useful when I’m in Portland, or Columbia, or literally anywhere else. Give me your keys,” Neil answered without thinking too hard because Neil knew him well enough to pre-empt his arguments. Andrew scoffed and tossed his keys over which Neil caught and turned just in time to not walk into the doorframe, but he had to dodge quickly, and he made a funny squeak as he did so. Andrew had to stop and rub his forehead with his thumb and index finger for a moment.

“Such an idiot,” he sighed. Neil shot a look over his shoulder and disappeared out of the stadium. Andrew followed and the door shut behind him.

“Are you sure you two aren’t married, you definitely fight as if you were,” Olivia teased.

“Right?” Allison agreed loudly from where she stood on the sidewalk outside. Neil and Andrew shot them both reproachful looks and they laughed.

“They’ve always been like that,” Aaron said. Andrew made eye contact with him and Aaron smiled. “Good game, man.” Andrew nodded once in thanks.

“Good game indeed,” Neil said, sidling up to Andrew and putting his arm around his waist. Andrew turned his face to accept Neil’s kiss while the group outside split themselves in groups for the three cars. “It was really fucking hot watching you play,” Neil said quietly in Andrew’s ear. Andrew pinched Neil’s waist and the red head cried out, getting the attention of the group again. He blushed from the tips of his ears to his neck. “Don’t mind us,” he said to the floor. Andrew hid his smile in Neil’s hair.

“Tell me about it later, baby,” Andrew said to Neil when the others had turned back to the task at hand. Neil’s smile was slow and teasing, Andrew’s stomach turned over pleasantly at the promise on his face.

“I’d love to,” Neil agreed. He pulled back and jangled Andrew’s keys in the air. “Who is riding with us?”

“That would be us,” Aaron said, holding Katelyn’s hand.

“And me,” Robin added, stepping forward shyly. “Carter is riding with Dan, Renee, Matt and Ally,” she said.

“Which leaves me with Alvarez, Laila, Jean and Olivia,” Jeremy chimed in. “Kevin is already there.”

“Let’s roll out!” Neil said and the group headed towards the three different cars in the three different parking lots.

*

The party was loud and phenomenally crowded with exy players, coaches, friends and family. Some of the Andrew’s Lions rocked up a couple hours into the night, and Andrew was introduced to Oscar and his boyfriend Jaiden from the Scorpions at some point too. A carousel of people went around Andrew, congratulating him on a game well played and saying that he’ll win next season for sure. A lot of people crowded around buzzing like flies about the goal he’d scored in the last knockout round, but they eventually realised he wasn’t really much of a talker and the group dissipated. Andrew wasn’t really left alone either. If it wasn’t Kevin, it was Renee; and if it wasn’t Renee, then it was Olivia; if it wasn’t Olivia, it was Aaron at his side for hours. Neil flittered in and out, often getting pulled away by Allison or Oscar or Kevin or faces Andrew hadn’t learnt names of or people he hadn’t cared enough to focus on. Andrew didn’t mean to get drunk, but it happened. One minute he was below his limit, and the next, the world was spinning and his stomach was roiling nastily. Renee was with him and he grabbed onto her elbow to stop from stumbling, even though the two of them were just standing on the outskirts.   
“Woah there,” she said, sounding surprised. “I told you I had no business mixing drinks, are you okay?”

“Water, air, now,” he slurred, swallowing against the saliva in his mouth that often preceded throwing up. Andrew really didn’t like vomiting. He didn’t like that it was something he couldn’t really control, and it was something that reminded him of withdrawals and the medication. Renee hooked her arm around his waist and dragged him through the party, out the back door, down the steps and around the side which turned out to be surprisingly barren of people. She helped him down to the concrete squares that seemed to make steppingstones in the dirt of whoever’s house this was.

“Here,” Renee said kindly, handing him a water bottle he hadn’t notice her pick up. She unscrewed the lid and Andrew sipped it, leaning forward, clutching his stomach. He was not going to throw up, he wouldn’t.

“You poisoned me,” he said. He didn’t really blame her, she had protested that she didn’t know how to make drinks, but Andrew had been preoccupied watching two people playing a game in the corner of the room and had asked her again to get him a drink. It was his own fault, not hers.

“Yeah, but you had fair warning,” she said, crouching down beside him. “Are you going to be okay? Do you need hospital?” Her voice was calm, collected, but even Andrew could hear the worry in her voice.

“No, I can hold my head up on my own and I can talk in sentences,” Andrew said, even though the talking thing was hard. “Signs I’m not in danger.” He took three big deep breaths before retching, but thankfully he didn’t bring anything up. Yet.

“I’ll get Neil,” Renee said. Andrew shook his head, his long blond hair falling forward, and he pushed it back weakly, not wanting sick in it if he did lose the fight.

“He doesn’t need to see,” he said.

“Too late,” Neil’s voice said, coming around the side. “Saw you two leg it out of the party and came to check.”

“I misjudged the ratios on his drink,” Renee said. Andrew didn’t bother speaking, just concentrated on swallowing small mouthfuls of water and tried to get the world to stop whirling.

“No worries,” Neil said lightly. “I’ll sit with him. Allison wanted to follow me out, but I told her I’d just send you back to her.”

“Would that be okay Andrew?” Renee asked softly. Andrew waved her concern away with a floppy hand and she rose to her feet. Andrew saw her give Neil a quick hug on her way past and then he came to crouch down where she’d been, facing Andrew’s profile.

“I really don’t want you to see me throw up,” Andrew said into the water bottle.

“Seen it before, Drew,” Neil reminded him. Andrew didn’t respond, just took in more water. “Can I touch you?”

“If you must,” Andrew said. Neil manoeuvred to a seated position next to him and put his warm hand on Andrew’s back, rubbing in circles. Andrew didn’t know why, but the movement made his nausea worse and before he could even think about it, Andrew threw up in the dirt. Neil held Andrew’s hair back, which he’d not had to do when Andrew went through withdrawal at college because his hair hadn’t been long enough then. Andrew rinsed his mouth out with water and spat it in the dirt before wiping his face with his sleeve. Neil made a disgusted noise but didn’t let go. “Why did rubbing my back do that?” Andrew demanded, kicking dirt over the vomit.

“Has no one rubbed your back when you’re sick before?” Neil asked quietly. Andrew felt small under Neil’s forlorn voice and didn’t answer him. “I couldn’t tell you, you’d have to ask Aaron for the specifics,” Neil said, taking his silence for the negative it was. “I just remember my mom doing it to help me throw up when I was younger.”

“Why did your mom need to help you throw up?” Andrew asked, his curiosity spiked. Neil let go of Andrew’s hair and put his hand on the small of his back again.

“I just refused to throw up if I was sick, I don’t know.” He paused and pulled the face that always meant he’d caught himself in a lie, so Andrew waited. “Sometimes my dad would put alcohol in my drinks at dinner, I don’t really know why. I’d feel woozy and sick and after he got his entertainment from watching me stumble around and crying, keep in mind I was like six, Mom would take me upstairs and rub my back until I threw it all up. She tried sticking her fingers down my throat, but I bit her,” he explained.

“That’s fucked up,” Andrew decided, his heart hurting a little for helpless, child Neil. He took a swig of water, more than a sip because he was already feeling better. “It’s a good thing you’re driving.”

“That it is,” Neil agreed. “We can go now if you want. Aaron and Katelyn were calling an Uber to their hotel just before you came out here. He told me to say goodbye and that he’d see you tomorrow for dinner.”

“Robin?” Andrew asked.

“Is staying at the same hotel as Aaron and Katelyn, with Carter, and they will go with them now,” Neil said. “No one for us to be responsible for, we can just go.”

“In a minute,” Andrew said, leaning back against the cold brick of the side of the house. Neil leaned back too, his hand still on Andrew’s lower back, and while Andrew regained some of his composure, Neil pulled out his phone. “Anything interesting?”

“Do you mean anything about us?” Neil asked, smirking at him. Andrew nodded his head and closed his eyes against another painful wave of nausea.

“Well, ‘Minyard Josten Rivalry’ is second trending, underneath the championship tag for the Tornadoes. Apparently, you leaning on Olivia after the game and me holding hands with Robin turned quite a few heads. As did your middle finger move at the end of the game. Some people are speculating over why I would be rooting for your team by wearing yellow, but that doesn’t seem to be getting as much attention as the Howyard and Crossten stuff or our interaction at the end,” Neil recited.

“Sounds about right,” Andrew decided. “Funny how most people behind this wall still thinks we hate each other.”

“It’s whatever, I don’t really care. I’m going home with you after this, beyond that is irrelevant tonight,” Neil said. Andrew’s fuzzy brain hiccupped on the word ‘home’, but the cloud cleared, and he smiled, feeling warm and not just from the alcohol.

“Home with me,” Andrew agreed. “One day we will have our own home.”

“I know,” Neil said quietly. He slipped his hand out from behind Andrew and took his hand instead, careful to avoid the part of his sleeve where he’d wiped his mouth. “You are home.”

“I am in the dirt,” Andrew pointed out, toeing the dirt. He struggled to focus and realised what Neil had meant as the taller man laughed. “No, wait. I know what you meant.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Andrew nodded. Neil got to his feet and pulled Andrew up after him. “You are my home too.”

“Let’s get out of here,” Neil said. Andrew nodded his okay, swaying as Neil capped the drink bottle.

When they got back to Olivia’s apartment, Andrew gave his consent for Neil to stand in the shower with him while he washed off the party, but when Andrew had tried to kiss him, Neil had turned his head away and kissed his cheek instead.   
“Not tonight,” he whispered, pressing their foreheads together. “You’re too drunk to make decisions like that now, I only asked to stand in the shower with you because it was safer than letting you be in here like this on your own.”

“But I want…” Andrew went to argue, to tell him it was okay because Andrew really did want to kiss Neil and more, but he paused as a surprising amount of relief flooded his body.  
“Thank you,” he said, shoulders falling forward. Neil smiled softly and guided Andrew to the bedroom and they dressed in silence while Andrew thought about it. Andrew didn’t really know what else to do other than climb into his side of the bed. Neil put the trashcan lined with a plastic bag on the floor beside Andrew, filled up the drink bottle and switched off the light before climbing into bed. Andrew rolled over to face him in the dark and Neil did too.

“Can I help you?” Neil asked.

“You said no,” he mumbled.

“I did,” Neil confirmed. “This isn’t consent, this is drunk. I’m not going to take advantage of that.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not going to be like them,” Neil whispered. “You matter to me.”

“No fucking then,” Andrew said quietly. “But can you still cuddle me?” He knew his voice was small, and Andrew had never actually asked to be held. He usually just held Neil, buried himself in Neil’s arms, or rolled over and dragged Neil with him. Andrew saw Neil’s smile in the dark and Andrew felt it slot into place in his heart.

“I can do that,” he agreed. “Roll over.” Andrew did and he felt Neil wriggle closer across the mattress until they were sharing body heat and Neil put his arm around Andrew’s waist, pulling him against his front. Andrew closed his eyes, felt Neil press a kiss to his shoulder, and then sleep was tugging at his consciousness.  
“Goodnight, handsome.”

“G’night, baby,” Andrew replied, at least he thought he replied, and then he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am aware that this is starting to drift away from the rivalry and focus more just on their lives, but I hope you're still enjoying it anyway...  
> The rivalry is still happening, it's just in the background of the story because it's in the background of their lives. It does come back in force later... :')


	16. "Thanks for Throwing Me Under the Bus."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil's first press conference!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: Transphobia and racism is referenced in this chapter!   
> Please read with caution if they are relevant to you <3

Neil sat down in his place at the long table, designated by a placard with his name on it. His first real press conference, a pro striker, for the Portland Scorpions. Oscar, an apparent fan favourite, Harmony and the new female recruit Neil had come to know as Lulu, captain Avery McKenna and Coach Fierro were also situated along the table. Neil knew he looked comically short next to Oscar, but at least Lulu wasn't too much taller than him on his other side.

"You nervous?" Lulu asked, her shaking hands suggesting that she definitely was. Neil shook his head and hid a yawn behind his hand. He'd stayed up most of the night with Andrew, not even talking, just together. There was a month between Championships and the start of next season training that the players could have a break and Neil and Andrew had spent the past two weeks driving from Chicago to Portland with Neil's things. Directly from Andrew and Olivia's apartment to Neil and Dante's was 30 hours of driving, but the pair of them had taken their time and stayed in motels and hotels along the way. Neil had even managed to convince Andrew to go on a few hikes with him during the days, made better by milkshakes at night. Andrew even had permission from management to stay offline, and Neil had no issues keeping his phone turned off the entire time. It had just been them, alone and off-grid, and Neil wished it would never end, which was why he'd stayed up until sunrise with Andrew that night. They wouldn’t get to spend the rest of the month together because Neil had press duties to attend in Portland and Andrew had Lion obligations in Chicago.

"Not nervous," Neil said tiredly, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his hand. "Just sleepy."

"You and Dante party all night?" Lulu asked, smiling kindly. She had dark brown eyes, so dark they were nearly black, but they were so friendly that Neil was drawn to her. She reminded Neil of Dan a bit, hardened by something in her life, but still kind and caring.

"No, Dante was playing video games until three though," Neil told her. "Why are you so nervous? Weren't you Class 1 exy too?"

"Yeah, I was, but I was never on press duty. It was always just the captain and co-captain. I should be alright though, the media training was helpful," she said, but didn't look convinced.

"I made three people on our PR team cry," Neil admitted. "They kinda gave up and said I could do whatever I want, within reason. Apparently, it's my brand anyway and they didn’t want to ruin it." Neil put 'brand' in air quotes. Lulu laughed, garnering attention from Harmony at her side and Oscar beside Neil.

"What's so funny?" Harmony asked.

"Neil's allowed to be a brat to the cameras because it's his brand," Lulu said, using air quotes as well.

"Just don't make us look bad," Harmony snapped. Neil smiled sweetly at her and opened his mouth to reply with his pent-up frustration for her shitty attitude when the conference was called to begin and anything they said now would be on the record. He closed his mouth and faced forward while Lulu and Oscar laughed into their hands.

"Neil! Neil Josten!"

"Josten!"

"Neil!"

The chorus of reporters trying to get Neil's attention startled Neil awake and he sat up straighter in his seat. McKenna warily pointed out one of the reporters, a young woman with bright pink hair.

"I'm Julia from Buzzfeed," she said, and Neil saw McKenna's regret immediately. "You were offline for the past two weeks, care to comment on your whereabouts?" She asked.

"No," Neil answered. "Next."

"Andrew Minyard was too!" Julia yelled before the crowd could interrupt.

"Good for him," Neil said.

"Is it true you two were seen by fans at rest stops between here and Chicago?"

"I don't know, were we?" Neil answered. Julia opened her mouth for more, but Neil held up his hand, took a deep breath, and looked at her with narrowed eyes. "I'm here to answer questions about exy and only exy, not Andrew Minyard."

"Why do you hate Minyard so much?" A second female reporter demanded. Harmony put her head in her hands and Oscar snorted mid-mouthful of water.

"Andrew Minyard says he hates me," Neil said simply. He didn't mention he's also said he loves him, that was a secret just for them. Reporters tried to get more information out of him, but Neil exercised an amount of control he didn't know he had and kept his mouth stubbornly shut until they started asking about exy. He answered questions about the Foxes and his time as captain, agreed that playing with the Scorpions was a great opportunity and he was looking forward to seeing what was to come during the next six months of off-season and the games to come. He said he would definitely be going to PSU when he could to watch Fox games, and confirmed that he did miss Robin, Wymack and Abby a lot. Finally, the interest in him drifted off and the questions were spread out more evenly among the rest of the panel. Oscar was thrilled to answer some of the personal questions, but any time his partner was brought up he said, 'no comment' and guided the conversation away. Neil knew they hadn't broken up, so he filed that away to ask about later. Harmony and McKenna, as seasoned professionals, took all the questions about last season and their hopes and plans for the coming season, and Coach Fierro stayed remarkably quiet. Lastly, the reporters turned their attention to Lulu and she visibly shrank into her seat at the onslaught. It took Neil a minute longer than he would have liked for him to catch on to what their line of questioning was, asking about transitions and medication and the advantages or disadvantages she would have on the court. Neil felt his blood boil as Lulu tried to fend off the questions and guide the conversation as effortlessly as Oscar had.

"Exy is a co-ed sport," Neil interrupted. "I've trained with Lulu; she is a remarkable player and an asset to the Scorpion dealers. No advantages or disadvantages, just a young woman doing what she loves. Moving on." He glared at the reporters, daring them to try him, but there was a silent pause. Lulu found his hand on the table between them and squeezed his fingers gratefully. He squeezed back.

"One more question," Coach Fierro warned the gallery.

"Josten!" Julia yelled first and the coach, with a sigh, inclined his head at her. Neil was ready to bite back at her. "Is your relationship struggling with the distance between you?" She asked. Neil was so taken by surprise his mouth fell open.

"Excuse me?"

"You and Robin are on opposite sides of the country, how is that affecting your relationship?" She reworded her question. Neil laughed without meaning to and slowly shook his head at the woman.

"Right, I know what you mean now," he said. "My friendship with Robin Cross won't be effected by the distance, you need not worry," he said, words bubbly with laughter.

"Friendship?" Someone echoed.

"We're done here," Coach said and the team was shepherded out of the conference room.

Out of sight and hearing range of the reporters, the group corralled in the lounge.

"So, you're not dating Robin?" Lulu asked. Oscar grinned wolfishly and meandered over to the two of them, putting his elbow on Neil's shoulder like Matt does sometimes. Neil considered dropping his shoulder and letting him fall off but decided he didn't mind too much that it was Oscar.

"No, I'm not. Robin is my best friend, I love her, but we aren't dating," he answered.

"Isn't Kevin your best friend?" Lulu asked. Neil wondered if the conversation was actually as juvenile as it felt.

"Kevin is like a brother, we fight and bitch most days, but we got each other's backs," Neil explained.

"So, you're single?" Lulu asked. Neil, probably for the first time in years, considered his word choice carefully. Neil wasn't close to Lulu, and he didn't immediately have a rapport with her like he'd had with Oscar and Dante, or even Olivia, so he didn’t particularly feel like announcing his relationship with Andrew to her. Besides, something about the way she was biting her lip told Neil she had ulterior motives for asking and he didn't know what those were.

"I don't have a girlfriend," he said. Oscar ruffled his hair and Neil batted his hand away while Lulu smiled prettily at him.

"In that case, did you want to go get lunch?" Lulu asked coyly. Neil realised what her ulterior motive was and cursed himself for missing it.

"I'm actually about to go buy a car," he said slowly. "But lunch sounds like a good team bonding experience. What about tomorrow? Oscar, you down?" He asked. He didn't miss Lulu's flash of hurt, but he didn't know how to make it better.

"Oh man," Oscar mumbled, not helping anything. "Yeah, I'm down for lunch. Bring Dante if he's free."

"Sounds good," Lulu said, smiling again. "Need a second opinion on the car?"

"Nah, Oscar's got that covered," Neil said, finally slouching so his arm dropped from its rest on his shoulder. Oscar jangled his keys in his pocket.

"Yep, let's go," he said.

"Bye Lulu," Neil said. The group called out goodbyes as Oscar and Neil left the stadium. They got inside the car before Oscar burst out laughing and had to press his forehead to the steering wheel.

"Aw man, I'm pretty sure you just broke her heart. That was brutal," he cried. Neil winced and sank down in his seat.

"Shut up," he moaned.

"Why didn't you tell her about Andrew?" He asked.

"I told you because you guessed it, and I told Dante because we're going to be living together. It's not just something I say for the sake of saying it," Neil muttered.

"Yeah, yeah," he said. "God, I hope she doesn't think you rejected her because she's trans," he said, sobering up immediately. Neil winced even more, a wave of guilt washing over him.

"Thanks Oscar," he muttered.

"Lulu is gorgeous, she'll find someone," Oscar said, patting Neil's knee and putting the key in the ignition.

"Yeah, I guess she is," Neil replied with a noncommittal shrug. Now that he thought about it, he could see that Lulu was pretty with her smooth dark skin, her multicoloured braids and her kind eyes. Neil felt Oscar's stare and glanced over at him. "What?"

"So, are you straight up gay?" Oscar asked.

"Huh? Oh, no I'm not," Neil said, realizing Oscar was asking because of Neil's apathy towards Lulu's beauty. Oscar paused and Neil raised his eyebrow. "What?"

"Is it because she's trans?" He asked.

"Oh my God, Oscar," Neil groaned. "No, that's not it."

"Is it because she's black?" Oscar asked, looking increasingly more judgemental.

"What the fuck?" Neil demanded. "I'm just not attracted to her. I'm not attracted to people as a rule."

"But you have a boyfriend you're attracted to?"

"Yes."

"So, you are gay?" Oscar pressed. Neil considered slapping him and decided against it.

"No. It's hard to explain," he said quietly. Oscar, seemingly convinced Neil wasn't a racist and transphobic asshole, looked a little more relaxed and turned the car on.

"Try me," he said. Neil sighed and settled back in his seat, ready to give the long explanation of his sexuality.

"Have you heard of 'demisexual'?" He asked. Neil was surprised by the understanding on Oscar's face.

"Yeah, sure I have. It's a subcategory of asexual right? You only feel attraction to someone once you've formed a connection or bond with them," he said. Neil was relieved he didn't have to explain it.

"Yeah. That's me," Neil said.

"Right, don't take my head off with my next question," Oscar forewarned, and Neil prepared himself. "I saw all the press about Andrew from his freshman and sophomore year, it didn't look like he was forming connections with anyone so how did that even happen?" He leaned closer to his door as if expecting Neil to strike him. Neil, instead, smiled down at his lap.

"It's common knowledge that my freshman year, his sophomore, was a shitshow," Neil began. "But it's less commonly understood that once Andrew started to get bits and pieces of what I was running and hiding from, he offered to protect me. He didn't really know what he was protecting me from, but if I stopped running and stood my ground at PSU then he'd have my back." Neil paused, fidgeting with his fingers as the uncomfortable feeling of being vulnerable settled in his stomach. "I started telling him more truths, which he returned with his own, and he did have my back. I'd never been attracted to anyone before, never been in one place long enough to work it out or let myself be known by anyone. But I learnt to trust Andrew, and he learnt to trust me. He was able to shoulder my problems, the burden that was my entire life, and he didn't flinch away. The thought of Andrew became inextricably tangled with my survival that year... when I found out he was, uh, sexually attracted to me I didn't see the harm in exploring that." Neil stopped talking as an embarrassed blush painted his cheeks. Oscar made a sound for him to continue. "Well, eventually I realised I wasn't just exploring the idea anymore. I was attracted to him too, I had feelings for him, and not only have I never looked back, I've not looked at anyone else." Neil was not used to sharing his feelings like that and when he stopped to let Oscar process the information, he also stopped to gather himself.

"That's deep as fuck," Oscar said. Neil huffed a laugh, hugged himself and looked out the window.

"Yeah, I guess so," he agreed.

"So, it's a forever thing huh?" Oscar asked. Neil hadn't really thought about it in laments terms like that, but the idea that it could end one day made him feel lightheaded in a bad way.

"During my freshman year, Andrew was in hospital for a bit, before I knew how either of us felt..." he said, remembering the traumatic time he'd had at Evermore during Andrew's stay at Easthaven. "For the entire time he was there I didn't understand why I felt this weird emptiness in my chest. Like I couldn't catch a full breath. When Andrew was released and I was around him again, that tightness went away. I still didn't get it then, I'm kind of an idiot, but that breathless feeling comes back if I think about not having Andrew."

"You hope it's forever."

"I don't know what I'd do if it's not," Neil said.

"I had no idea you were so poetic and romantic, Josten," Oscar teased.

"Shut up, Oscar," he grouched, going pink again.

"Don't worry, your tragic love story is safe with me. I won't even tell Jaiden," he said. Neil didn’t realise he'd been worried until he wasn't anymore.

"Thanks."

"No worries man. Now let's get you a car," he said, pulling onto the street the dealership was on.

*

Neil was sitting on a beanbag in the small living room of the apartment he and Dante were renting while Dante played a horror game on his PlayStation when Neil’s phone rang. It was after dinner and Neil was mildly intrigued in the story of the game Dante was playing, but he snatched up his phone immediately and answered it when he was in the hallway, walking to his room.   
“Hey, handsome!” He said brightly.

“Thanks for throwing me under the bus,” Andrew said gruffly, but there was no heat in his voice. Still, Neil frowned and pushed open his door.

“What bus?” He asked, kicking his door closed behind him.

“ _’When asked about the Minyard Josten Rivalry we have all come to expect from the striker and the goalie, Josten brushed off the accusation that he hated his old teammate. ‘Andrew Minyard says he hates me,’ he said to Julia Black at the conference today.’_ ” Andrew sounded like he was reciting something, and Neil guessed the Buzzfeed reporter had posted her story.

“Oh that?” Neil asked. “Well you do say it.”

“Because I do hate you,” Andrew shot back.

“Yep, I know,” Neil replied sarcastically. “Anything else interesting surface from the press conference?”

“You’ve upset a few people who liked you and Robin together, but most of them are in denial which is somewhat amusing. Some conspiracies that we were together these past two weeks, but otherwise nothing exciting.”

“Is it a conspiracy if it’s true?” Neil asked, flopping onto his bed. Andrew seemed to consider this question seriously for a minute.

“I don’t know. It probably is until we confirm it as true,” he mused.

“Where are you anyway?” Neil asked. Andrew hummed and Neil heard papers rustling.

“I’m in Montana, a place called Red Lion Inn somewhere in, I think, Anaconda?” Andrew replied.

“So, about a quarter of the way back to Chicago,” Neil guessed.

“Something like that,” Andrew agreed. He sounded exhausted, which didn’t surprise Neil too much. It was thirteen hours since Andrew had driven off that morning, leaving Neil in his new apartment and setting off back home. Neil guessed Andrew would have been driving for about nine or ten hours that day.

“You okay?” Neil asked. Andrew made a dismissive sound, but Neil asked again.

“Fine, fine. Just tired,” he said. “I just wanted to ask about your car.”

“Of course you did,” Neil muttered. His car was just a means to an end now that he wasn’t at PSU where everything was local and easy, especially with Robin’s car, and with Andrew and the Maserati going back to Chicago, Neil didn’t really have much of a choice. He idly wondered what the fans would say if they knew Andrew liked cars as much as he did, it was one of those small facts that you only knew about him if you spent enough time around him and paid attention. “It’s nothing exciting, just a small blue Prius that had full mechanical history and not many miles on it. It will get me where I need to go.”

“That’s boring,” Andrew said.

“Whatever,” Neil said with a laugh. “Last I checked, my money bought your car so shut it.”

“Your life paid for my car,” Andrew shot back.

“Semantics,” Neil replied. “Have you eaten?”

“Yes.”

“Okay good,” Neil said, relaxing a little more. Andrew wasn’t the most reliable on feeding himself proper food if he didn’t have to, always opting for sweet food if he had the choice. Neil didn’t ask what he’d eaten, but decided to trust that Andrew was looking after himself. “Class 1 exy starts up in a month, do you think Robin is going to be okay?”

“She’ll be fine,” Andrew said. “She has a key to the Columbia house if she needs it.”

“That’s true,” Neil agreed. “I want to be there for their first game if I can be,” he added.

“Are you telling me or inviting me to come along?” Andrew asked. Neil’s nose twitched as he considered that, and he rubbed it with the corner of his phone.

“Will you come?” He asked.

“If I can,” Andrew agreed. Neil felt the little helium balloon of happiness swell in his chest.

“Good,” he said. Neil wasn’t sure when he would next be able to see Andrew, but knowing that it could be in a month was enough for him. “How’s your sunburn?”

“Go to hell, Josten,” Andrew muttered. Neil laughed at the annoyance and stretched out. Going on a summer road trip with a boyfriend paler than your half Irish friend was not often the smartest move. Especially when said pale boyfriend had an aversion to the texture and smell of sunscreen. Andrew had a red burn on his shoulders and the back of his neck, which might have been protected if he hadn’t insisted on tying up his hair and wearing tank tops. The tan lines from his sunglasses and armbands were severe, but Neil wasn’t going to bring that up and risk Andrew hanging up.

“That bad huh?”

“I should have just put on the sunscreen,” Andrew said quietly.

“You tried, it’s okay. Next time just wear sleeves and a hat,” Neil said. It was true, more than once on their road trips over the years Andrew had tried to wear sunscreen when they went on walks or to the beach. Something about it didn’t sit well with Andrew, he’d snapped and gotten angry the first few times Neil had offered it to him when they’d been at college, and he wouldn’t come within touching distance of Neil until he’d washed his own off at the end of the day. The two of them had come to the same realisation that it was a sensory issue for Andrew on their road trip after Andrew’s graduation, and Neil no longer offered it to him. Neither of them had thought past that, so they didn’t have hats or sleeves or any other form of sun protection, which Neil knew wasn’t a good thing, but there wasn’t anything they could do after the fact.

“Or next time we don’t climb mountains,” Andrew said.

“I like my idea better,” Neil decided.

“I’m sure you do,” Andrew grumbled. “I’m going to bed now.”

“Okay, speak to you tomorrow?” Neil asked.

“Sure, I’ll ring you when I find somewhere to sleep,” he said.

“Good!” Neil agreed. “Sleep well, Drew.”

“Goodnight, baby,” Andrew said softly. The phone call ended, and Neil went back into the living room with a smile on his face.


	17. "No, You Have a Dinosaur."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The old team is in LA  
> Twinyards and Nicky go to Santa Monica Pier  
> DINOSAUR STUFFED TOY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading, you've been with me for so many updates!! It's very exciting for me <3   
> For those of you who have followed me on Tumblr and TikTok as well, thank you!! Special mention to @thegreenerartist on Tumblr for sending me a message about this fic <3 Made my day!!!
> 
> Disclaimer: The term 'PTSD' is used in this chapter and I am aware that it's (probably) not a literal use. I do believe that PTSD is a diagnosed mental health issue and isn't to be taken lightly.

With six months of Class 1 to go before the pro league started games again, Andrew was back to having one weekend a month free from Friday morning to Monday night. Neil’s contract was the same, not that either team management knew that, or the reason why. Most of those weekends, Andrew drove down to PSU for Friday night and picked Neil up from the airport on his way. They watched the Foxes play, and often win, stayed at Wymack and Abby’s for the night, then drove to Columbia for the rest of the weekend. Twice, Robin and Carter went with them. Every Saturday he spent in Columbia Andrew had dinner with Aaron, but most of the time it was just him and Neil all weekend. Five weekends in Carolina. It wasn’t enough time, but it was also the routine Andrew was used to.   
Those weekends were Andrew’s most active weekends on Instagram, not that he had any say in it. Neil seemed to adore taking candid pictures of Andrew when they had their weekends. Pictures of Andrew reading, watching the games, making coffee, lying on the grass in the backyard, staring past the camera at Neil. Picture after picture was uploaded, and sometimes Neil saved the pictures to post during the month when they weren’t together. Andrew let him have free reign of the account because it kept Fiona off his back. It was creating quite a storm online though. The first handful of pictures Neil posted since getting Andrew’s account details all those months ago had garnered some attention, asking who the lucky girl was who got so close to him, people accusing Olivia and him of keeping their relationship a secret, but it wasn’t too bad. As Neil took more pictures and posted them at scattered intervals, specifically those weekends, the internet had started mad conspiracy theories to work out who it was. Logically, Olivia made sense because they lived together, but Olivia had started dating a nonbinary bookstore owner from downtown Chicago and the relationship was public enough that it ruled Andrew out of the picture. Coincidentally, no one had assumed it was Neil taking and posting the pictures. It had been a year since Andrew accidentally instigated the Minyard Josten Rivalry, and he wasn’t really sure why it hadn’t died down yet. Neil and Andrew weren’t hiding anything, they didn’t change their behaviour when they were seen together at Fox games, and their antagonisms online were never cruel or unusual. Their friends and family were still enjoying it though, especially Nicky who continually liked posts and followed the tag like it would answer his prayers. Articles were written, timelines theorised, pictures snapped and shared at specific moments of crude hand gestures, eye rolls or hot and heavy looks that could be misinterpreted as annoyance. It rarely was annoyance, but that was not something either of them would comment on.   
“They were so close to championships,” Neil groaned, rolling off Andrew’s chest onto his back beside him on the bed. Andrew attempted to tug his oversized shirt out from under Neil’s back, and when it didn’t budge, he dug his finger in his ribs. Neil squawked and rolled further away, and Andrew fixed his shirt.

“You’ve been complaining for a week,” Andrew reminded him. The Foxes were knocked out of the death matches the week before Championships, which upset Neil more than it upset Andrew. It was more of a blessing than anything because the pair of them weren’t able to go to South Carolina that weekend. It was technically their contracted weekend off, but a popular media platform who used YouTube as part of this platform had reached out to the PR teams in charge of Kevin, Neil, Andrew, Matt and even Allison and her fashion line. Now the entire group was in LA for an interview they’d been promised would be fun and interesting. Andrew highly doubted that. However, ever since Neil’s graduation, a new tag had started climbing with popularity and it seemed to have got enough attention that mainstream media was starting to use it when talking about the nine (ten when they mentioned Seth) Foxes from Neil’s freshman year. The tag referred to the #FirstFoxes who graduated PSU playing exy with the Foxes, from the girls to Neil. It was the group of Foxes that had made people sit up and take notice of the team. When Neil, Matt, Andrew, Kevin and Allison were invited to LA for the interview, Renee, Dan and Aaron were roped in as well. The first time the First Foxes would be seen all together in a professional setting since they all played together. What was probably the most surprising, outside of Aaron agreeing to it, was that Nicky was being flown in from Germany by the media company.   
Which was how Andrew found himself sprawled out in a hotel bed in LA on a Friday afternoon, Neil now on the opposite of the bed, pouting and holding his ribs.

“You’re an asshole,” he said. Andrew lolled his head to the side to look at him properly.

“Go figure,” he replied blandly. Neil scrunched his nose up, his bottom lip still poked out. Andrew reached out across the bed and put his index finger against Neil’s lip and pushed it back into his mouth. Neil’s response was to bite down on the tip of Andrew’s finger, his lips curving in a smile. Arousal and pleasure were warm and slow moving in the pit of his stomach and Andrew narrowed his eyes at him. Neil’s lips parted and Andrew pushed his finger further into Neil’s mouth. Andrew felt Neil’s tongue work against his finger and Neil closed his eyes, Andrew’s stomach tightening at the look of contented bliss on Neil’s face. Andrew was about to pull him closer when a knock on the door startled both of them. Andrew went to climb from the bed to check it, but Neil bit own on his finger in an effort to keep him there. Andrew used his other hand to flick his nose and Neil smiled, opening his mouth. Andrew wiped his hand on Neil’s shirt, ignoring his amusement.

“Andrew, are you in there?” Nicky called from the other side of the door. “Neil isn’t answering his door and I thought I’d see if he was here before Allison reported him a missing person.”

Andrew turned to look at Neil again and asked, “Are you in here?”   
Neil rolled back across the bed and put his face against Andrew’s chest, eyes closed, and fingers loosely splayed over his heart. Andrew put his hand in Neil’s curls and kissed the top of his head. It had been over five years since their first bruising kiss on the rooftop of Fox Towers, and if someone had told Andrew where they’d end up, he would have pushed them off the roof. Probably.

“I’m not here,” he mumbled against Andrew’s shirt.

“Come on Andrew!” Kevin yelled. Andrew realised the entire group was collected outside his door looking for Neil.

“Your search party is about to knock down my door,” Andrew murmured.

“It’s the PTSD from Baltimore,” Neil decided. Andrew figured he was probably right, and he knew that fear firsthand, so he didn’t feel guilty about poking him in the ribs again and Neil made another loud, indignant noise. He didn’t roll away this time, just returned the favour by biting down on Andrew’s arm, making Andrew yell out in turn.

“Allison!” Nicky yelled.

“They’re both in there!” Aaron called out to wherever Allison was in the hallway.

“Beating each other up by the sounds of it,” Nicky added, loud enough to be heard through the door. There was a long pause and Andrew rubbed the sore spot on his arm while Neil made himself comfortable again.

“Neil Josten, get your skinny little ass out of that bed and into your jeans! We are going shopping before dinner!” Allison yelled. Andrew had never, and he meant never, heard Neil make the noise he did at hearing Allison say that. It was a cross between a whine and a groan and a curse. Andrew was a little alarmed and he pushed Neil off him until the red head sat up and looked down at him.

“What the fuck was that?” He demanded.

“Oh, right,” Neil looked sheepish. “I’m fine, just letting Allison know I do not support this decision.”

“Just go,” Andrew said, pushing him again, this time rising into a seated position to be eyelevel. “I’ll see you at dinner.”

“You should hang out with Nicky or Renee,” Neil said. Andrew had already been considering hanging out with Nicky because he hadn’t seen his cousin since the brief weekend of his wedding in Germany when Andrew had been wobbly from his fear of heights and out of sorts with the time difference.

“Something like that,” Andrew agreed. Neil rolled from the bed and crossed the room to open the door where the entire group of Foxes was milling around.

“Scatter, all of you,” Neil said, humour in his voice and waving his hand at the them.

“Except me,” Allison put in.

“Nicky and Aaron can stay too,” Andrew said, climbing from the bed. Kevin made an offended noise and Andrew made eye contact with him over Neil’s shoulder. “I see you enough as it is, get lost,” Andrew told him. Kevin pulled a face at him, but let Matt drag him off with Dan. Renee kissed Allison and darted after them, linking her arm with Dan. Nicky put his hand on Aaron’s shoulder and propelled him into the room, with Allison following last.

“Sure, come on in,” Neil said drily.

“This isn’t your room either,” Allison pointed out. Fair point, Andrew decided, seeing as though Neil and Andrew had been given separate rooms in the hotel, organised by the media company. Seeing as though Renee and Allison, and Matt and Dan had rooms together, it was safe to assume Andrew and Neil’s relationship was still not common knowledge. In fact, their rooms were at opposite ends of the hall to each other, so Andrew had a feeling the people in charge of this endeavour believed the rivalry rumours.

“She has a point, you aren’t allowed to get shitty at people coming into my room,” Andrew said to him in Russian. Neil’s response was to tell him to go fuck himself in the same language. They practiced the language as much as they could, sometimes only talking in Russian on phone calls, but it was still so that they could talk without being understood by others.

“Fuck you both,” Nicky moaned in German.

“Fuck all of you,” Allison said in English. Neil laughed and winked at Andrew, closing the bedroom door.

“Give me ten to get changed,” Neil told Allison, and Andrew flicked Aaron a look. Aaron nodded his head once, understanding Andrew needed ten minutes too.

“You two talk Russian,” Nicky said, nodding between Andrew and Neil, “and you two have your creepy twin thing,” he added, regarding Aaron and Andrew.

“Tough,” Andrew said, grabbing it up from the end of the bed. Neil pulled a face at him and jumped around to get his skinny jeans up his legs. Andrew was not about to change in the room with the audience seeing as though this was not a locker room, but he did put his clothes down again and pulled his hoodie over his head. He threw it across the room, over Allison’s head, and it landed on Neil’s shoulder. He stopped jumping, did the button and fly up, and grinned at Andrew.

“Thank you, this works too,” he said, pulling the hoodie on.

“You won’t need a raincoat or umbrella,” Allison said. “It’s LA, the weather won’t be too bad. And I have a car,” she added. Even though Allison and Renee lived in Los Angeles, they’d been offered a room in the hotel for the weekend too, but the couple had all their resources at the touch of a cell phone button.

“Alright, I hate this, but let’s go shopping,” Neil said. He came over to Andrew, kissed the corner of his mouth and then followed Allison out of the room with his keys, phone and wallet.

“I’m getting changed,” Andrew told his family. They draped themselves on the armchair and bed while Andrew went into the bathroom to change out.

Renee didn’t ask questions when Andrew asked to borrow her car, just handed the keys over and told them to have fun. It was a nice car; new and flashy which Andrew knew was probably Allison’s choice more so than Renee’s. Andrew drove, but he let Aaron ride passenger and his twin chose the music while Nicky nattered on in the backseat about Germany and Erik. Andrew listened, but he didn’t have much to comment on as he drove the thirty-minute ride to Santa Monica Pier. Andrew had been a few times in his life, but not many, and none of the experiences had been all that good, with foster families who hated him. Some part of Andrew knew he was taking his cousin and twin there because they were the only relatives he’d ever had who actually gave a shit about him. Bee would be proud of him, he made a mental note to call her next week when he was back in Chicago.

“Oh cool!” Aaron said before regaining his composure. He was a twenty-five-year-old man, he clearly felt a little embarrassed at being so excited to see the amusement park. Andrew rolled his eyes and nudged Aaron with his elbow.

“It is cool,” he said. Aaron looked him in the eye for a long moment before nodding, a smile gracing his face again.

“It is,” he agreed.

“I am going to make myself sick on ice cream,” Nicky said, scrambling out of the car. Andrew switched it off and put his hand on the door handle.

“Let’s go or he actually will,” Andrew said, climbing out, Aaron’s laugh following him. The trio went and bought triple scoop ice cream cones and walked down the pier until they found somewhere to sit and eat. It was chilly being so close to the water and Andrew pulled his borrowed jacket tighter around him. Honestly, Neil shouldn’t complain about Andrew borrowing his jacket, he hadn’t been able to wear his favourite black hoodie for near enough three years.   
Nicky and Aaron talked, mostly about Aaron’s study and Nicky’s work. They talked about Katelyn and Erik too, both so stupidly happy and proud of themselves and where they were in life. Andrew didn’t join in the conversation, but he listened, and he felt content to be sitting between them on the pier as they shared happy stories. Andrew remembered all the bad stories they’d had to share in their lives, and he remembered the empty silences when they’d lived together in Columbia, punctuated by only German homework and TV.

“And how are you?” Aaron asked Andrew during a lull in the conversation after their ice creams were finished.

“I’m good,” Andrew said after a long moment. “I never thought I would say that, but it’s true. I’m good,” he said.

“You seem, well…” Aaron trailed off, puffing his cheeks out as he thought. “Happier than I’ve ever seen you.” He shrugged, as if to apologise that he didn’t have the right words. Andrew didn’t really know what ‘happy’ was supposed to feel like. He couldn’t remember ever being happy, but he thought that perhaps what he’d found was peace. A peace within himself, his family and his relationship, but also with the world. He didn’t feel like there was something that needed fixing. Where he was at was where he wanted to be, and Andrew liked that feeling.

“I think…” he chose his words carefully, but when he spoke, they rang true. “I think this is the happiest I’ve ever been. I don’t know if it is happy, or if I’m just content, but this is good. I am good.”

“I’m really proud of you,” Nicky said quietly. “We both are.” His voice was hesitant, probably expecting to get brushed aside or even threatened with a knife that Andrew hadn’t carried with him for a long time.

“I’m proud of all of us,” Andrew said. “Anyway,” he added pointedly, and his family members laughed.

“Alright, alright,” Nicky said. “What should we do now? I am so down to totally kick your asses in some carnival games.” He stood from the ground and grinned down at Andrew and Aaron.

“He reckons,” Aaron said, climbing to his feet.

“Bring it on bitches,” Nicky taunted. Andrew was the last to get up, but when he did, he followed the two of them back down the pier to play some stupid games and win stupid prizes.

*

Nicky rode shotgun on the way back to the hotel where they would clean up and join the others for dinner at the hotel restaurant, but Aaron still chose the music much to Nicky’s distaste. Sitting on the backseat next to Aaron was a blue and green plush toy dinosaur and a pastel pink duck that Andrew had won in one of the games. All three men had won toys in the games, but they’d given them to parents of kids nearby to hand out each time they won, except the dinosaur and the duck. Andrew kept those, much to Aaron and Nicky’s teasing.

When he got back to the hotel, Nicky and Aaron went to their rooms, but Andrew knocked on Renee and Allison’s door. Judging from the noise inside, all of the First Foxes were in there, waiting for the monsters.   
“Come in!” Allison called. Andrew pushed the door open and immediately spotted Neil standing on the bed in a brand-new outfit. Well, that wasn’t quite true. The socks and jeans were new, and he had a new haircut that Andrew liked, but he was still wearing the hoodie he’d left in, which was Andrew’s dark green one. Renee got to her feet and came over, taking the keys back and when he handed her the pastel coloured duck, she’d kissed his cheek in thanks, sweet smile on her face.

“You have a dinosaur,” Neil noted, jumping from the bed to land directly in front of Andrew.

“No,” he said, shoving the dinosaur against his chest. “You have a dinosaur.” Neil grinned and took the toy from Andrew, holding it against his chest in a hug.

“I have a dinosaur,” he agreed. “You want to get changed before dinner?”

“Yeah, are you staying?”

“No, I’ll come. Need to put Dino away,” he said, making the dinosaur wave. Andrew regretted giving it to him immediately, but he also didn’t because Neil was smiling stupidly like Andrew winning a cheap stuffed toy from a carnival was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for him.

“Meet you in the restaurant in thirty minutes?” Renee asked.

“Alright,” Andrew said. He left the room with Neil and knocked on Nicky’s door. “Downstairs in thirty, tell Aaron,” he said.

“Got it!” Nicky cheered. Andrew let Neil slot their hands together and pull him down the hall to Andrew’s bedroom where Neil had all of his things as well.

“Did you have a good afternoon?” Neil asked, putting the dinosaur on the pillow on his side of the bed. Andrew put his arms around his waist and rested his chin on his shoulder, seeking warmth and affection, not that he’d say as much. Neil turned his arms and kissed him softly. “You don’t have to answer that, I know you did,” he said.   
The thing was Andrew had had a good afternoon and part of him was even looking forward to the dinner. Even if the interview tomorrow was incredibly boring and normal, he was glad to be in LA with all these guys. With the people who had given him, not just a second chance, but as many as he’d needed to reach this point.


	18. "Close Your Eyes and Trust Me."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FUN INTERVIEW THING!  
> FOXES REUNION!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a pretty long update so get comfy <3

Andrew stood with his old team to the side of the studio as the producer briefed them on the order of events for the videos. It would start with a game of guessing who'd written which Tweet to get them comfortable, then they would film the 'First Foxes Answer The Most Googled Questions About Them' part of the video, then they had a surprise for a third video. The three videos would get released over the week on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube. Andrew wasn't keen on the 'surprise' part of this endeavour, but at that very moment he had more important things to be worried about. Namely the blue haired woman running from person to person and coating their faces in powder. Apparently, the lights would make them shiny. The girls didn't need much, Allison having coated them all in more products than Andrew cared to know about earlier that morning. Kevin had done his own makeup and Neil had even let Kevin and Allison put some products on him and he was looking very cute and very not shiny. Nicky, Matt, Aaron and Andrew had declined her offer with varying degrees of politeness. Now she was standing with her arm around Renee looking very smug.

"It's just concealer, BB cream and powder alright boys? Just smooths out your complexion and you won't be shiny," blue hair said. It wasn't alright with Andrew. He didn't want her up in his face, he didn't know her. His heart was hammering in his chest as she worked quickly, moving around the line. Neil was standing a little away, with the girls who were all good to go. The lady finished working on Nicky and turned to Andrew with her products and a cheerful grin.

"Alright, let's get started!" She said. Andrew took an involuntary step back and his hands curled into fists. Neil was there in an instant, standing at his side without touching him.

"Does he need to wear all of it?" He asked, pointing at the three products. The lady looked surprised and glanced down at the wheeled table she'd been dragging around.

"I, well yeah. Probably. Let me have a look at your face?" She said to Andrew. He didn't move, but when she stepped closer, her hands behind her back, he didn't back away. Andrew realised she was standing like that because Neil had put his own hands behind his back in a signal to her. Andrew felt his heart slow down just a little. "You don't want this stuff on your face or is it you don't want me putting it on?"

"Both," he replied firmly.

"Okay, we can forego the BB cream because you have a nice, smooth complexion, albeit a little pale. Just the concealer under your eyes and on the little blemish on your cheek, and the powder," she said, lifting a stick of makeup towards him. Andrew backed up again, glowering at the lady. "I'm not going to hurt you. Just stand still, please?"

Andrew flinched. Anger and fear coursed through his body and he fought every instinct he had that was screaming at him to fight his way out of this situation. Neil put his hand in front of Andrew's line of sight, blocking blue lady from sight. It was equally annoying as it was effective, and Andrew flicked his gaze to Neil.

"I'll do it," he said. He was talking to blue lady, but kept his gaze locked on Andrew. "We'll go to the corner, and Allison can talk me through it."

"No," Andrew ground out between his teeth.

"It's either me or Blue Lagoon okay?" Neil said. Andrew gritted his teeth and stared him down, but as usual Neil didn't budge. "You won't freak if it's me touching your face, so that's one problem sorted. We can deal with the second issue over there."

"Fine," Andrew agreed. Neil lowered his hand and thanked Blue Lagoon, nice quip Neil, as he took the handful of things he'd need. Andrew stalked off to the corner where Allison was waiting, he assumed she'd overheard the conversation. Renee had drifted off to watch an argument between Kevin and Nicky over the food table.

"I thought you said they hated each other?" Blue Lagoon asked the producer, not quite quiet enough to be out of earshot.

"You know fuck all about Exy don't you? That's Josten and Minyard, they have a public rivalry."

"That entire _thing_ was not hate," Blue Lagoon insisted.

"Whatever, the rivalry will get us views so keep your opinions to yourself," the producer grumbled. If there was more to the conversation, Andrew didn't hear it as he reached the chair and the leggy blonde in a tight dress of her own design.

"Do you want to sit or stand?" Neil asked him. Andrew grit his teeth and sank into the chair. Neil handed Allison all the products and tools and as she surveyed them, Neil touched his knees to Andrew's. "I'm gonna stand between your legs so I can reach your face," he said. Andrew moved to accommodate that, and Neil shuffled forward a little.

"Alright smart ass," Andrew said. "What's your plan for getting that shit on my face without me punching you in yours?"

"I've got one, it's a little unorthodox though so bear with me," Neil said, smiling a little. Andrew frowned, but let Neil circle his wrists with his fingers and slid his palms under Neil's shirt. The marred, brutalized skin was familiar under Andrew's fingers and palms and he held onto Neil's hips. Andrew had always wondered why Neil didn't push him away when he idly touched Neil's abdomen and hips, his fingers tracing and feeling the history of scars there. Andrew knew where each one was, could map them out from memory, but he couldn't explain why it was calming to feel the raised scars under his skin. Apparently, Neil had worked out that Andrew found it somewhat centring. "Just focus here," he said, pressing Andrew's hands against his skin and letting go.

"Alright, so, eyes and cheek?" Allison guessed, peering a little closer at Andrew's face. He hadn't expected her smile. "I didn't know you had freckles Andrew, they're kind of cute," she said. Andrew narrowed his eyes at her.

"Ally," Neil warned. She huffed and stood up straight, handing Neil the concealer stick.

"Right, just put this on the lil’ spot on his cheek and under his eyes. Only a bit, this shit is good and goes a long way. Then you're going to use this sponge to sort of smooth it out and spread it out," Allison explained. Neil took the stick of concealer and held his pinkie up in front of Andrew.

"Close your eyes and trust me," he murmured. Andrew pulled a face at him, his chest tight in apprehension for whatever this cream was going to feel like on his skin and closed his eyes. Neil touched Andrew's cheek with his pinkie, featherlight and gentle. The contact left his face and Andrew held his breath. Neil touched him again, still his pinkie, but it was tacky with concealer this time. Andrew did not like it and his grip on Neil's hips tightened a little more. Neil smelled like maple syrup and strawberries from the pancakes they'd had before they'd been picked up at the hotel and Andrew let himself breathe again.

"Okay, I'm going to do your eyes now. It's going to be the same thing, sponge and all," Neil warned so that Andrew didn't entirely freak out when he went close to his eyes. Andrew pressed his thumbs harder against Neil's hipbones as he worked, but it didn't take too long.

"You actually did a good job," Allison complimented. “Now for the powder. Andrew, keep your eyes closed a bit longer.”

“Just hurry up,” he gritted out. Andrew listened to Allison’s instructions, so he knew what to prepare for, and even though Neil warned him when he was about to touch him, Andrew flinched violently. He knew it was instinctive, not wanting to be touched when he couldn’t see it coming, but usually he could tamp that down with Neil because it was worth it. Having a weird texture put to his skin was not worth it. Neil withdrew immediately, not far enough that Andrew had to let go, but he got up out of his face. Andrew opened his eyes and took a deep breath.

“You don’t like the brush?” Neil guessed. Honestly, Andrew hadn’t given it a chance, he’d just reacted to the touch of something to his face that ultimately wasn’t Neil’s fingertip. Andrew hated needing special treatment, he wanted to punch or yell or storm out of the room. His skin felt like it was crawling, it felt like everyone was staring at him and it wasn’t making this any easier.

“I don’t like any of this,” Andrew snapped. He looked around the studio, but no one was watching the goings on in the corner. Nicky and Matt were throwing food in each other’s mouths as Aaron and Kevin watched with unamused looks on their faces. Dan and Renee were standing near the section of the studio where all the cameras and lighting was set up.

“Give me your hand,” Neil said. Reluctantly, and suspiciously, Andrew withdrew one hand from under his shirt and let Neil hold onto it. He watched as Neil ran the makeup brush over the back of his hand, but being able to see it, and it not being on his face made it a little easier to bear. “Okay, now your face,” he said. Neil stepped back in between Andrew’s legs and took the tub of powder from Allison again. Andrew put his hand back under Neil’s shirt and dug his fingers into his hipbones again. “Yes or no?” Neil whispered.

“Yes,” Andrew replied after a moment. The powder smelt, well, like makeup so he held his breath and waited until it was over. The good thing about powder was that it wasn’t sticky, and it didn’t feel heavy on his skin.

“Here, can you take these back to Blue Lagoon lady?” Neil asked, and Andrew started breathing again. Andrew opened his eyes just as Allison took the brush off Neil with a nod. “Thanks for your help,” he added.

“Anytime,” she chirped. She looked down at Andrew from her tall vantage point and smiled directly at him, probably for the first time ever. “I hate that you need next to no makeup to look good, Minyard, but it’s true.”

“Is that your attempt at a compliment, Reynolds?” He asked her, relaxing his grip on Neil’s hips and Neil turned between Andrew’s legs to look at her.

“Look, monster,” Allison said, but there was no anger in her voice. She sounded genuinely happy that she’d been able to help. “It was as good as you’re ever going to get.”

“I guess I’ll take it,” Andrew muttered.

“And I’ll take these,” she said, proffering her hands laden with makeup things. She kissed the top of Neil’s head and waltzed off on her ridiculously high heels.

“Why do people kiss my head or ruffle my hair?” Neil asked, looking over his shoulder at Andrew who hooked his arm around his waist and pulled him down to sit on his lap.

“Because you have this baby bird thing about you,” Andrew said. “People want to look after you.”

“Baby bird?” Neil demanded, looking indignant.

“You’re also small, your head is the easiest place to reach,” Andrew added.

“Hey!” Neil protested. Andrew smiled, but hid it against Neil’s shoulder. “You do look good, but you don’t need makeup for that.”

“Get off me, Josten,” Andrew said. Neil stood and turned with his hand out for Andrew and he took it, feeling less high strung than he’d felt only a short while before. “You look cute,” he said against Neil’s cheek. “You should wear eyeliner more often.”

“Get off me, Minyard,” Neil mocked, but his cheeks were a little pink. Andrew wanted to thank him for being patient, for understanding what he needed when his immediate reaction had been panic and violence. He didn’t quite have the words, staring into Neil’s bright blue eyes lined with black, but Neil squeezed his hands as if he knew.

“Alright team, we’re ready to go!” The producer yelled. Andrew pulled his hand out of Neil’s and pushed him in the shoulder, propelling him towards the set. In some instinctive, or perhaps habitual way, the group gathered around Dan where she stood with Renee. The set held a large, dark red four-seater couch on a white floor with white walls, two plush stools behind the couch, and lots of lights and three cameras at different positions and angles. There was a seat off camera for the interviewer to sit and ask the questions, but it was clear they weren’t supposed to be seen or focused on. This was all the foxes.   
“Okay, we’ll have the Minyard brothers on either end of the couch, with Renee next to Andrew and Dan next to Aaron,” the producer said.

“Who sits where, Laura?” Dan asked, going over to the couch with Renee and Aaron in tow. Andrew was the last to move to the couch and the producer, Laura apparently, pointed for Aaron to sit at the far end so Andrew sat down on the cushion closest. He was glad it was Renee who would be penning him in against the arm of the sofa, at least he wouldn’t be uncomfortable with it, but it helped that she was small enough that they didn’t touch much, only their shoulders if they jostled. The seat was strangely comfortable if he was honest and he settled down against the arm.

“Kevin, do you want to hop on the arm near Andrew, Nicky the same but on Aaron’s side,” Laura ordered. So much for comfortable. Kevin perched on the arm, both legs draped over the end so at least he didn’t hang over Andrew’s lap, and he did leave enough room on the wide arm for Andrew to lean into the corner. Nicky wasn’t being quite so thoughtful on his end of the couch by the sounds of it. Aaron kept swatting their boisterous cousin as he tried to get comfortable, and while they worked it out, Laura asked Matt and Allison to sit on the stools behind their wives.

“Is there room for Neil?” Nicky asked, quitting his fidgeting. Andrew looked over to where Neil was lingering at the wings, waiting as patiently as someone with his amount of restless energy could wait.

“Of course, he can squish in down between the girls at the front, or sit wherever he wants,” Laura said cheerfully. Neil looked at Andrew, then down at his lap and back up to his face, his eyebrow raised.

“Don’t fucking think about it,” he warned. He had no issue with Neil sitting on his lap, especially because it would hide him from the camera, but he knew how excitable Neil was likely to get during recording, even if it was just to bad mouth the interviewer, and Andrew didn’t want to cop an elbow in the stomach or nose.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Neil replied sarcastically, rolling his eyes. He went around Kevin and climbed onto the back of the couch, wedging his feet onto the sofa cushion on either side of Andrew.

“You’re a menace,” Andrew growled, being forced to sit up straighter with Neil behind him.

“Oh absolutely,” Neil agreed. “Comfy?”

“No.”

“Good.”

“Don’t flatter yourself, he wants to sit next to me,” Kevin teased, leaning closer. “Bros before hoes, am I right?” He stage-whispered. Andrew considered pointing out that Kevin was the one who’d been in an open relationship for six years, from before PSU until graduation, so who was the hoe? He decided against it because Neil started talking instead, and also because the cameras were possibly rolling anyway.

“Andrew is a bro too,” Neil said pointedly.

“I’m not your bro,” Andrew shot back. Kevin and Matt laughed openly, but Nicky tried to pass his off as a cough. Andrew saw Laura send a deliberate look to Blue Lagoon, as if to say that she was right about the rivalry. Blue Lagoon didn’t look at all convinced, which Andrew decided was probably fair seeing as though he was currently leaning against Neil’s leg.

“Andrew, we’ll just have you sitting a little more forward, so you’re not hidden by Neil’s knee…” Laura said. Andrew leaned forward, elbow on his knee and chin in his hand. Apparently, that was good enough for everyone else, or they saw someone from the team make a gesture that suggested they not ask more of him. Whatever it was, it worked for Andrew. “Talk among yourself, shuffle, get comfy, do whatever, we’re just going to adjust lightning and camera. If you look down to my left, you’ll see a screen which is what we can see through the cameras.”

“Thanks!” Dan said, sounding fairly excited now. Andrew glanced down at the large screen and saw his old team as everyone else would see them. Close, comfortable, familiar in each other’s presence, and happy. All of them were smiling, even Aaron had made himself fit between Dan and Nicky and was smiling up at Nicky as their cousin waved his hands wildly as he talked. Andrew looked at Neil over his shoulder and when he had his boyfriend’s attention, he pointed at the screen. Neil leaned over Andrew to look, then turned his face to look at Andrew.

“What about it?”

“That, right there, is your fault,” Andrew said. Neil looked back at the screen, resting his chin on Andrew’s shoulder.

“That we all look like we belong here?” Neil asked.

“That we all get along, period.”

“Good, I’ll take the blame for that,” he said, sitting back. Andrew smiled against his curled over fingers where they pressed against his lips.

“Okay, are you all ready to get started?” Laura asked, sitting down in the interviewer chair.

“We are!” Dan agreed.

“Okay, cameras are rolling and anything you say is on the record,” Laura began, pulling flashcards out of her jacket pocket. “These are Tweets we have taken from your accounts, I’m going to read them out and you’re going to guess who posted each one! Let’s go!” Laura cleared her throat, got comfortable and read from the first card. “’Pineapple on pizza is a curse, don’t try to convince me otherwise’.”

“That has to have been Nicky!” Allison said immediately. Andrew, who probably should have expected this, realised he was at a serious advantage. With his eidetic memory, he knew exactly who’d said it and the date of the Tweet.

“Nicky likes pineapple on pizza,” Aaron pointed out.

“So does Neil, and they’re both wrong,” Kevin said.

“Babe, wasn’t it you?” Renee asked, patting Allison’s hand.

“It was Matt,” Andrew said, loud enough to be heard over the guessing. The group dissolved into silence and Andrew straightened up off his palm and glanced around at them. They clearly hadn’t expected him to join in, judging by their varying looks of surprise. “What? It was him.”

“It was,” Matt agreed, grinning at him. “Kevin’s right, Nicky and Neil are both wrong.”

“I don’t question what Neil eats anymore, he’s often wrong,” Andrew deadpanned.

“Says you!” Neil complained. “Mister ‘I can eat ice cream for breakfast’.”

“You’re as bad as each other,” Kevin said, groaning like they’d just punched him in the stomach.

“Well Andrew was right, it was Matt!” Laura said. “The second Tweet is, ‘The moon is a trans lesbian and I hope she blesses me on my wedding day’.”   
Andrew looked over his shoulder at Allison and realised he was not the only one looking at her. All eight of them were looking at her and she smiled down at Renee.

“I stand by it,” she said fondly.

“So that was a pretty resounding answer for Allison, and you’re all right,” Laura said. “Next up, ‘Until the idiot learns how not to get caught between a glass wall and someone twice his size, I won’t waste my time’.”   
Andrew went back to resting his chin on his palm and smiled against his fingers.

“Was that Kevin? Like, way back when he hated us all?” Nicky asked.

“No, surely that was Neil taking the piss out of Aaron!” Kevin argued.

“My money’s on Neil,” Matt agreed.

“Could just as easily be Aaron about Neil,” Renee pointed out.

“Nah, Aaron wouldn’t waste his time even making the Tweet about Neil. Could be about Andrew though?” Allison guessed.

“Ooh, good point. I’m betting on Neil too,” Dan said excitedly. Andrew felt Neil’s foot wiggle against his thigh, a subtle and annoying demand for attention, and Andrew leaned back to look up into his smiling face.

“It was you, asshole, about me,” he said.

“You’re still an idiot,” Andrew told him, resisting the urge to put his hands on his cheeks and pull him down closer for a ‘spider-man kiss’.

“Then don’t waste your time,” Neil teased, sitting up straight again.

“Was it Andrew?” Allison asked Laura.

“It was,” Laura confirmed. “Next one?”

“Yes!” Nicky and Dan cheered. Andrew leaned against the arm of the couch, Neil’s leg against his side and Kevin right there in his space. It was so much like college, Andrew relaxed more than he expected he would have.

“Okay,” Laura said with a laugh. “’@knoxonwood I would die if you liked this, literally die, Jeremy please love me’.”

“Oh, drunk Kevin, what a delight,” Andrew drawled.

“He wasn’t even drunk when he Tweeted that,” Allison said, holding her stomach as she giggled.

“No, it was one morning at our place, he was just bored waiting for Allison to finish her conference call and wanted attention,” Renee input. Andrew watched all this happen on the screen and he saw Kevin look at the camera, screwing up his nose, eyes wide. Kevin and the girls only lived about two hours from each other and often posted pics online of their outings. Neil saved them all and made sure Andrew saw them whenever there was a new one.

“Jeremy they’re bullying me!” Kevin said. “It’s fine, he does love me,” he added, waving his hand dismissively. Neil was bent over double laughing, and Allison was rubbing his back as she grinned at Kevin. Andrew decided he felt like a character on The Office, looking directly at the camera every time his old teammates did or said something stupid.

“Okay, we have one more Tweet for you to guess, then we’ll take a five-minute break before we film the Google questions one,” Laura told the group. “Last Tweet, ‘Why are there no wild cows?’”

“My bet is on Nicky or Matt,” Neil said immediately.

“What makes you say that?” Nicky demanded. “It was a stupid Tweet, I never said it.”

“My bet is on you two because it _was_ a stupid Tweet,” Neil said. “Have either of you looked at your accounts? You never have anything important to Tweet.”

“I take offence,” Nicky said. “Just because I say nonsense sometimes doesn’t mean it’s all nonsense.”

“And I refuse to accept that you’ve put me in the same category as Nicky,” Matt added.

“It is a really weird question though,” Allison said.

“It has the same attitude as Nicky or Matt,” Kevin agreed.

“What, silly?” Nicky demanded.

“I can see Matt saying that,” Dan said slowly. Andrew looked away from the camera at Renee’s tap on his knee, lolling his head to look at her. Her smile was small, and sweet, and knowing. Andrew let the group around him dissect the Tweet, call it silly, try to pin it on Nicky or Matt.

“You going to let them fight it out?” Renee whispered. Andrew shrugged with one shoulder, but she waited patiently, staring back. He straightened up and put his hand in the air.

“It’s my Tweet,” Andrew said. “It was one of the first ones I ever made.” The response was radio silence before Neil, Kevin, Aaron and the girls burst out laughing. Nicky and Matt started yelling triumphantly and Andrew folded his arms across his chest. “Can we have a break now?”

“Cut! Okay, off the record guys. You may, we’ll call you back to the couch in five. Remember where you’re seated,” Laura answered, rising from her seat. She smiled warmly and the group unravelled from their positions. The nine of them gathered around the food table, stretching legs and arms, teasing each other about stupid Tweets and Nicky complained that none of his were read out. Neil was standing under Matt’s arm, the two of them arguing about pineapple on pizza while Neil ate raw pieces of pineapple off the fruit tray. Andrew ate a donut, fending off Kevin’s hand as he tried to snatch it off him.   
Five minutes wasn’t very long and before Andrew could swallow a drink of water, he was getting led back to the sofa, his cheeks bulging. Neil poked him in the cheek and Andrew seriously considered spitting the water on him, but he swallowed and swatted his hand away.

“Andrew would be the king of Innuendo Bingo,” Nicky said, settling down behind Aaron. Neil opened his mouth, no doubt about to ask what that was, but Laura beat them to it.

“Alright, First Foxes, let’s get going, you’re back on the record,” she said. She handed Dan a poster board with a Google Search engine picture on it with her name in the box. Under it was four covered questions, apparently the top questions searched with her name in it. The aim of the game was to answer the questions for the fans. There was one board for each player, so Andrew made himself comfortable, this was going to take a while. Laura explained the rules and said she was going to sit pretty much quietly and just let it play out, would only interrupt to bring them back on track if it was needed. Dan pulled off the paper on the first question and read it aloud.

“Is Dan Wilds married to Matt Boyd?” She smiled sappily at him over her shoulder and he kissed her cheek fondly. “I sure am! Next question is… ‘What was Dan Wild’s stripper name?’”

“You don’t have to answer that,” Matt said quickly, everyone on and around the couch feeling a little tense, even Andrew. He knew Dan’s relationship to her stripper name was similar to his own relationship with ‘Doe’. It was just a fact, a part of their pasts, and not something to be ashamed of because it wasn’t something they could change.

“It’s fine, I was known as Hennessey,” she said. “I have no reason to be ashamed of my past, if it had been different then I wouldn’t be here.”

“Aww Dan,” Allison said, reaching over to hug her with one arm, Renee doing the same.

“Third question!” Dan said. “’Why didn’t Dan Wilds go pro?’ That is a good question, I don’t think I’ve ever actually addressed that in a proper setting. Going pro was never my end goal, I do love Exy, but I always wanted to be a coach. Coach Wymack was my inspiration, I want to make a difference to lives, to a team. Like he did for all of us here.”

“You’re a good person,” Matt said fondly.

“That was the first thing I was ever told about Dan,” Neil said. Everyone looked at him with surprise and he shrank a little, shrugging. “Nicky said, ‘she’s good people’ and pointed her out in a pic, my first day in South Carolina.”

“After Andrew threatened you in the elevator?” Nicky asked.

“That’s the day,” Neil confirmed. Andrew smirked, looking down at his crossed arms. He wasn’t about to say he hadn’t been threatening him, because he totally had been, but he’d also just been trying to make sense of Neil.

“My last question, ‘Who does Dan Wilds coach?’ I coach a Little League team in Columbus at the moment and I love every minute of it.” Dan handed her board to Laura who swapped it for Renee’s. “Do you want to hold your board?” Dan asked her. Renee shook her head, but she reached over to peel the paper off.

“’Did Renee Walker change her name when she got married?’ No, I did not. My name was given to me by my adopted mother and it is a part of who I am that I didn’t want to let go of.”

“And I completely understood, and I decided not to change my name because of my fashion label, mostly,” Allison added.

“Hey, it’s not your turn!” Nicky said. Matt reached over and pushed Nicky off the arm of the couch and Aaron laughed louder than anyone. Aaron was also the one who helped him up off the floor, which Andrew considered was more than the loudmouth deserved.

“My second question, ‘Is Renee Walker married?’ and I most certainly am!” Renee peeled off the paper for her third question and touched the cross around her neck as she read it. “’Is Renee Walker religious?’ yes, I am born again Christian.”

“Which we all love about her,” Dan said, leaning against Renee’s shoulder.

“As long as she’s happy,” Andrew said quietly, gaining a coo from Allison and Dan and surprised scoffs from his brother and cousin. Neil wriggled his toes again, which Andrew decided to interpret as support for his words. Renee smiled at him and touched her necklace again.

“Same goes,” she said. “My last question is ‘what does Renee Walker do now?’ And I politely decline to answer that,” she continued. Andrew knew that was because Renee didn’t have a paying job but spent all of her time working and volunteering in youth shelters, church-based charities and other humanitarian projects. Renee didn’t want publicity for her good work, she said it would make it feel cheaper, and nobody on or around that couch was going to take that from her. Renee’s board was swapped out for Nicky’s and he made grabby hands for it, holding it over Aaron’s head so it could be seen by the cameras and annoy the blonde in the process.

“Alright! Question one! ‘Is Nicky Hemmick gay?’ Come on, be original guys! Are people really googling that about me?”

“Just remember that not everyone had to listen to your lewd flirting for five years,” Aaron said drily.

“It was incessant,” Neil agreed. Andrew tightened his grip on his own arms and Neil knocked his knee gently against his shoulder.

“Andrew had to threaten Nicky with a knife to get him to knock it off more than once,” Aaron said.

“Shut up,” Nicky grumbled, but it didn’t sound genuine. “If the answer wasn’t obvious, I am gay. I am married to a man and everything. And my second question, ‘why did Nicky Hemmick move to Germany?’ The better question is why was I here? I lived in Germany for a few years before I came back to be legal guardian to the twins here. I stayed because of the scholarship, but I was always going to go back home to Stuttgart.”

“Our cousin-in-law lives in Germany,” Aaron explained in short. “He went back for his man.”

“Yeah, that,” Nicky agreed, his grin cheesy. “Third question, ‘why did Nicky Hemmick not go pro?’” Nicky paused to laugh, shaking his head at the question. “I was barely good enough for Class I guys, what makes you think I could have gone pro?”

“He also did really well in his major, it was expected he would pursue it,” Andrew said. Nicky made a strangled noise and Andrew looked at him, eyes narrowed in concern. “Are you dying?”

“No, just, thank you,” he said. “That was really nice…”

“Answer your last question Nicky,” he said, turning back to face forward.

“Okay, sure. ‘Is Nicky Hemmick Andrew and Aaron’s dad?’…” Nicky trailed off and frowned down at his board, turning it away from the camera to get a better look. He looked down at Aaron who had his head buried in his hands. Andrew, in turn, was rubbing his temples to ward of the headache the question was going to give him. Kevin snorted and Neil spluttered like he didn’t know what to think of the question, while Renee, Allison and Dan stared at the camera with varying degrees of shock or amusement.

“How… how many people have googled that question for it to be the fourth most searched about you?” Matt asked, shaking his head slowly.

“Too many people,” Andrew said, dropping his hands from his face.

“Andrew and Aaron are my cousins, they’re only a couple of years younger than I am,” Nicky said, handing the board down to Dan. She swapped it for Matt’s but held onto it instead of passing it back to him.

“I’ll read, you answer,” she told Matt.

“Let’s do it,” Matt agreed easily.

“First question, oh it’s easy. ‘How tall is Matthew Boyd?’ The answer is just, tall. He’s tall,” Dan said.

“I am six foot seven,” Matt said, laughing, his hand on Dan’s shoulder. “Tallest one here, and that’s all that matters.”

“I’d be tallest if it wasn’t for you,” Kevin said.

“This isn’t about you Day, wait your turn,” Andrew said.

“Why isn’t anyone pushing him to the ground?” Nicky complained.

“Would you dare?” Neil asked. Nicky eyed Kevin and then Andrew before shaking his head. Andrew nodded in satisfaction and Neil spoke again, “Didn’t think so.”

“Next question, ‘Is Matthew Boyd single?’” Dan read. Andrew put his hand in his pocket to fidget with the plastic toy, trying to stay still and patient.

“No, happily married man. I hope you’re searching that because you think I’m attractive, I’ll take the compliment,” he said calmly, flashing the cameras a broad smile.

“Easy there, playboy,” Dan teased. “’Will Matt Boyd try out for Court?’”

“Not this coming Olympic season. Tryouts aren’t until the end of next season, not this one, and I have a feeling I’ll be a little busy at home by then. Maybe the following time,” Matt said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“Before anyone can interpret that,” Dan said. “The last question is, ‘does Matt Boyd have kids?’” She bit her lip and looked down, and even Andrew felt his curiosity spike.

“I will have a kid in seven months,” he said, grinning down at his wife. _Jesus Christ._ The first baby Fox. Andrew felt a smile pull at his lips, a very muted reaction compared to Neil launching himself at Matt while Renee and Allison dove to hug Dan, squealing, but it was a reaction nonetheless. When the hubbub calmed down, Andrew leaned a little over Renee towards Dan and she raised her eyebrows, looking a little wary.

“Congratulations,” he said. “If you could keep us in check, you can do anything, especially raise kids.” He spoke quietly, but everyone heard him and froze. He needed to stop that from happening. He knew it wasn’t exactly common knowledge, or expected, but Andrew liked kids. They were small and innocent, and Andrew was not going to be an adult who ever made them suffer, feel unloved, uncared for, or abandoned. If, by any means, Andrew was a part of this kid’s life, he wanted to be a good influence.

“Can we cut that out of the video?” Matt asked into the silence.

“Why?” Laura asked, which Andrew considered a good question.

“Because that was, kind of cool, and means a lot to all of us so it would be great if that wasn’t shared on a public platform,” Renee said gently. Andrew saw Allison flash what could only be described as a threatening smile at Laura. A lot of people on that couch had a lot of influence and more money than any of them knew what to do with after not having it for their entire lives, so when they all asked for something, it was probably in Laura’s best interest to agree.

“Absolutely, we will cut before Andrew spoke. We can send it to you though, in an uncut version if you want?” Laura agreed. Andrew leaned back into his seat and Neil put his hand on his shoulder. Andrew hadn’t realised his heart was racing, maybe because of his message for Dan or when they asked to delete it, but he felt a little calmer at Neil’s touch. His words had been accepted, listened to even, and they appreciated it. Neil supported him. It wasn’t going to hurt him to have been momentarily vulnerable.

“Thank you, yes please,” Dan said, passing Matt’s board back, taking Aaron’s. Andrew wasn’t going to lie, he was mildly interested to see what people were searching about his ex-Exy player, med student brother.

“First question, Aaron Minyard, do you want to do the honours?” Dan asked. Aaron pulled off the paper on his first question and immediately went a shade paler. Andrew wanted to yank the board over and see what it was, but Aaron read it aloud with a steady voice before he could.

“’Was Aaron Minyard charged with murder?’” Aaron looked past the two women between them to meet Andrew’s eyes. Andrew didn’t move or give anything away, letting Aaron make the decision on how to play this, but his heart was in his throat. Everyone seemed to be holding their breath and Neil had fisted his hand in the back of Andrew’s jacket which you wouldn’t be able to see on camera. Whether in his own frustration or mixed emotions, or a pre-emptive attempt to keep Andrew in his seat, Andrew wasn’t sure. “I was found not guilty in a murder trial. The murder of which was an act of self-defence and, um, protecting my brother.” Aaron pressed his palms together and looked back at the camera. “It isn’t something I take lightly, and I will never escape what happened that day.” He accepted Nicky’s hand on his shoulder, cleared his throat, and read the next question. “’Is Aaron Minyard Andrew’s twin?’ No, Andrew is just two kids in a trench coat that followed us around in college,” he answered sarcastically.

“Two kids?” Matt asked. “He isn’t even big enough to be one kid.”

“Fuck off!” Andrew grumbled. Aaron smiled and pulled the tape off the third question, one that immediately made Andrew want to sink into the couch or go home. “’Who is taller and who is older, Andrew or Aaron Minyard?’ We don’t know who is older, trust us, it annoys us to not know.”

“Who’s taller?” Matt asked curiously. Aaron smirked at the camera.

“Me, by one inch,” he said smugly.

“Get over it,” Andrew grumbled. The others laughed and Aaron pulled the last tape off without ceremony.

“’Is Aaron Minyard playing pro Exy?’ Nope, playing Exy at college was a means to an end for me. I graduated pre-med at PSU and I am second year postgrad med at Columbia. I want to be a surgeon, and my girlfriend is studying paediatrics.” Aaron looked proud of himself, and a little shy as well.

“The more successful Minyard,” Andrew said. Aaron made a face at him.

“You’re famous, shut up.”

“Alright, shall we do Allison now?” Dan asked, holding out the board for Laura. Renee held Allison’s board and after a moment of Allison struggling with her acrylic nails, Renee peeled the tape off them and read them for Allison.

“’Is Allison Reynolds a lesbian?’”

“Nope, I am bisexual and proud of it,” Allison said without fanfare.

“’Will Allison Reynolds be releasing a lingerie line?’”

“Absolutely, hopefully for my Summer/Spring collection, watch this space,” Allison said, all business.

“’Does Allison Reynolds still play Exy?’”

“I do, I play in a local competition! I wasn’t willing to give it up entirely, and I would have gone pro if I didn’t have my heart set on my fashion business, so I found a team here in LA and I still love it,” Allison said. Andrew knew that Allison, as beautiful and high maintenance as she appeared, was an inspiration to women everywhere that they can do what they want to do, no matter what people say or think of you. He could appreciate that.

“’Is Allison Reynolds married to Renee Walker?’”

“I am. Everyone seems interested in our relationship statuses. I swear there’s more interesting things about us,” Allison answered.

“That was a lightning round,” Laura said, swapping the board for Andrew’s.

“Do you want me to do this part?” Renee asked, holding his board. Andrew nodded, not real invested in peeling, holding or reading aloud. He was a little apprehensive about the questions, he wasn’t sure what people would be googling about him, and so he didn’t know how to prepare. “’Is Andrew Minyard really a sociopath?’”

“Those articles about you in your freshman and sophomore year really didn’t help much huh?” Nicky mused. Nicky couldn’t exactly speak. He’d thought Andrew was a psychopath or a sociopath up until Neil spelled it out for him in their junior year.

“I’m not a sociopath, nor am I a psychopath, and contrary to popular belief, I do not suffer from mania either,” Andrew said calmly. The drugs had caused his mania, his upbringing and trauma were, well, to blame for a lot of the other things.

“’How much can Andrew Minyard lift?’”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Andrew replied.

“How much is it now, Andrew?” Kevin asked.

“You are looking pretty buff,” Matt commented.

“I can lift more than Neil can,” Andrew deadpanned, wanting to move on from the line of questioning. Andrew, to be completely honest, didn’t know. When he was being pushed to his limits by his coach, he wasn’t paying attention, just getting through it while they stacked on the weights and spotted him.

“Uncalled for,” Neil complained. “I’m fast, not strong, jerk,” he muttered.

“’Is Andrew Minyard dating Olivia Howard?’”

“No, Livia and I are just friends who share an apartment together. Next?”

“Oh, this is a good one,” Renee said. Andrew looked down to read it, but she moved it from his line of sight, smiling happily. “’Is Andrew Minyard the best pro goalkeeper?’”

“Statistically, no, but public opinion seems to think so,” Andrew answered after a minute. It was true, his stats weren’t the best in the league after one season, but since he’d scored a goal from the other side of the court months ago, everyone seemed to be saying he was.

“We think so,” Nicky crooned.

“Where was that goal scoring ability in college though, huh?” Kevin said. Andrew took his board off Renee and slapped him in the shoulder with it, making everyone laugh, and then he calmly handed it back to her. Over Andrew’s head, Kevin was handed his own board. That would put Neil last.

“’Will Kevin Day be trying out for Court?’ You bet your ass I will be. I won’t just be trying out, I’ll make it.” Kevin said, throwing the piece of tape across the couch to land on Aaron’s head. He laughed as Aaron fished it out of his shorter hair. “’Is Kevin Day married?’ Not currently. Thea and I spent a long time apart during college and the start of her professional career so we’re content with just being together more.”

“You gotta get in on this marriage game bro, the only one who has an excuse is Aaron and that’s because he’s the only one of us still a broke ass student,” Nicky teased. Andrew glared over at his cousin, and he could tell Neil, Kevin and Aaron were as well. Neither Aaron nor Andrew mentioned that Aaron wasn’t completely broke as Andrew was the one paying his college bills because he didn’t know what else to do with the sheer amount of money handed to him just for playing the stupid sport. Andrew also wasn’t about to offer up an excuse as to why he and Neil weren’t married. It wasn’t anyone else’s business, but also Andrew didn’t actually have an excuse. The only one he could really come up with was… neither of them had asked, and that probably wouldn’t fly in this setting.

“Get over it, Nicky,” Kevin said. “Anyway! ‘Does Kevin Day have any tattoos?’ I’m assuming you meant apart from the one directly on my face?”

“Probably,” Allison said.

“No, I don’t. But I’m thinking about it. The last question, ‘What are Kevin Day’s stats?’ I am so glad you asked!” He didn’t sound at all like he was kidding. The group collectively groaned and let Kevin rattle off his stats from the top of his head. Andrew knew them too; he knew all the stats of all the strikers in the league because he was a goalkeeper with perfect memory recall. Kevin was just an Exy driven narcissist.

“That leaves Neil Josten for last,” Laura said, handing over his board. Dan passed it to Renee who offered it to Andrew who stared at it in her hands for a second before reluctantly taking it to hand up to Neil. “Actually, Andrew, if you could hold it and read the questions, that would be great. It would get hidden behind you if Neil took it,” Laura interrupted. Andrew tried to give it back to Renee, but she shook her head and gave him an encouraging smile. Dan read Matt, Renee did for Allison, and now Andrew for Neil. He knew sitting in the front row was going to suck.

“’Is Neil Josten….’” Andrew trailed off as he read the question properly before his mouth caught up with him. First Aaron, now Neil. God fucking dammit.

“Is Neil Josten what?” Neil asked. Andrew took an invisible, deep breath, and tried again.

“’Is Neil Josten Nathan Wesninski’s son?’”

“Oh, I see,” Neil said quietly, the muscles in his leg going tight. Andrew subdued a jolt of surprise when he felt Neil’s cold fingers on his bare back under the hem of his jacket and shirt, seeking strength or comfort or something. “I was, yes. The Butcher of Baltimore was my father, that isn’t exactly new news.” His tone was measured, careful, and Andrew could hear the silent beg for the next question to go better.

“’Is Neil Josten single?’” Andrew read, resisting the urge to roll his eyes.

“Allison was right, there is much more interesting things about us,” was Neil’s non-answer. Andrew felt amusement in his chest and fought the smile off his face.

“’How tall is Neil Josten?’” Andrew asked. He didn’t like the pause that followed, and when he glanced over his shoulder, he didn’t like the mischievous look on his face either.

“Taller than you,” he said, looking down at him.

“I hate this game,” Andrew said.

“As much as you hate me?” Neil quipped.

“I hate you more,” Andrew replied.

“Why are short people so angry? Like chihuahuas,” Matt said.

“They’re closer to Hell,” Allison quipped, a pre-emptively apologetic hand on Renee’s shoulder. Nicky laughed, patting the top of Aaron’s head in front of him which earned him a dirty look. Andrew ignored them, turning back to the board on his lap and peeling off the last piece of tape.

“This isn’t even a question. It just says ‘Neil Josten is baby.’”

“What does that even mean?” Neil complained.

“It means that you are small, innocent, I guess? People want to like, protect you and care for you,” Allison explained. Andrew felt Neil’s finger poke him in the back, probably remembering the baby bird comment earlier.

“No, I’m not ‘baby’,” Neil said firmly. Andrew looked directly at the camera again.

“Yes, he is,” he said. What made it even better was that everyone else said the same thing in unison.

“I hate this game,” Neil grumbled.

“Alright and cut! Off the record again guys, that was brilliant. Go have a twenty-minute break, we will call you back when it’s time for the third video surprise!” Laura said animatedly.

The Foxes didn’t drift too far apart from each other for the break, but Andrew stayed a little further away to regain some energy before the last shoot. He sat cross-legged on the floor near the food table, playing with the food on his plate more than eating it. He pulled bread into strips, crumbled a muffin to dust and ripped the paper into small pieces, systematically turning everything into the smallest he could make it. Neil was standing with Matt and Dan, but after about fifteen minutes he came and sat next to Andrew with his own plate piled high with enough food for an athlete.   
“Here,” Neil said, proffering the plate in his direction. “Seeing as though you’ve destroyed yours.”

“You don’t need to feed me,” Andrew said. His relationship with food had always been interesting. Apparently his aversion to certain textures, tastes and combinations was pinned under his autism diagnosis, but he wasn’t sure why he didn’t like eating meals in front of other people if he didn’t have to or why he would rather pull it apart instead of eating it. Trauma, autism, neurosis… he could probably just choose. He pushed the wry thoughts aside and took a sandwich off Neil’s plate, which made Neil smile and put his plate on the floor between them. Andrew pulled pieces from the chicken and salad sandwich and ate them from his fingers while Neil wolfed down two sausage rolls and something with what looked like salmon on it.

“I wonder what this surprise video is,” Neil mused.

“I don’t like the look of it,” Andrew said, watching as the people running the show set up what appeared to be a low cage around the set.

“Are they going to make us wrestle?” Neil asked. Andrew flicked him a look that he knew very well called Neil stupid. “What? It’s possible!”

“Neither yours, mine, Kevin’s or Matt’s management teams would let them do that,” Andrew said, already bored of explaining, but another thought occurred to him. “I also don’t think they’d be stupid enough with our history as a team, picking fights.”

“Don’t you mean your history, not ours. You’re the only one in this room who has beaten someone nearly to death,” Neil reminded him. Andrew hummed as he considered this, chewing on a piece of lettuce from his sandwich, which was only edible because it was soaked in mayonnaise.

“I don’t know about the only one, Blue Lagoon lady looks pretty capable,” Andrew said, inclining his head in her direction. The makeup artist/assistant was probably as short as he was and, in Andrew’s opinion, worryingly thin, so she may not be physically capable of winning in a fight, but she had a glint in her eyes that told him she’d give it a good shot if provoked. Neil laughed into his hand and flicked a crumb at Andrew.

“Alright, so not wrestling,” Neil agreed as the organisers moved the sofa and stools away while Laura threw a number of large, coloured pillows on the floor. They looked like square couch cushions, but twice the size. “I want the red one,” Neil said. Andrew looked at him out of the corner of his eye and realised his boyfriend was being serious and was about to fight their old team for the dark red pillow.

“Child,” Andrew said.

“Oh yeah, and which one do you want?” Neil asked. Andrew looked back at the collection of pillows and sighed. “The green one, right?”

“Shut up, Neil.”

“God, I love being right,” Neil said, sounding as delighted as possible. He clambered to his feet and put his near empty plate on the table before coming back to Andrew with his hand extended. “You getting up?”

“Why should I, I’m clearly about to be getting back on the floor,” Andrew answered.

“You want to crawl? And you call me a child,” he said. Andrew rolled his eyes and let Neil pull him to his feet.

“Go annoy someone else,” Andrew said, waving him away. There was only a minute or two left of the break before they were called to sit in the kindergarten looking playpen and Andrew felt a wave of anxiety. He didn’t like not knowing, he didn’t like surprises, and he also had a plate heaped with crumbs sitting at his foot that he needed to deal with. Neil took his dismissal as easy as always and left Andrew to pick up his plate and dispose of it, counting backwards from fifty in his head. It was the first thing Bee had ever worked on with him, grounding techniques that brought him back from whatever edge he was about to tumble over. The counting one had originally been used after he’d come down from his medication to sleep and had only a small window of time between his last round wearing off and the withdrawals kicking in to actually get to sleep. Now, counting backwards helped him relax in general, almost as if he was still preparing to sleep.   
When Laura called for them to gather, Andrew had a bit more of a grip and was ready to face whatever surprise this was going to be. He was, however, considering talking to Fiona about putting a ‘no surprises’ clause in his contract.

“Okay so this video is less formal, no real structure to where you need to be seated as long as we can see you. Just grab a pillow and sit down within the confines of the pen,” Laura said.

“What is this, preschool?” Allison asked, following Dan and Renee over the low black cage wall. Andrew went after them and subtly grabbed up the green pillow without making eye contact with Neil, but he heard his boyfriend’s laugh as he snatched the red one. They weren’t the only ones, apparently, who’d had their sights on a particular colour because Nicky nearly knocked Aaron over in their short squabble over a purple one, and Allison reluctantly handed over the pink one to Renee. Matt managed to get the dark blue one without challenge though, and like Andrew and Neil, looked quite smug as he sat down in the middle with Dan on her orange one.

Kevin mumbled sheepishly, holding his pillow a little tighter. Aaron shook his head and folded his hands in his lap. Everyone was gathered fairly central, with room to walk between the individual people stretched out on the floor. Andrew and Neil instinctively sat closer to the back wall so they could see the entire room. The filming space wasn’t too big so they weren’t exactly excluded from the group, but after readjusting the cameras, Laura asked them to come forward because they were a little too small to be up the back. Nicky made some space between him and Matt for Neil to sit down and Andrew dropped his green pillow a little in front of him, next to Renee.

“Alright lovelies, we are filming now! Back on the record! We are going to be asking you questions sent in to us from your fans and followers, meanwhile you will be…” Laura drum-rolled unnecessarily on her legs and Andrew felt his stomach tighten with apprehension for whatever this was going to be. He saw a man come in through a door behind the camera, a large box in his hands, and Andrew narrowed his eyes at him. “Playing with kittens!” Laura announced. Andrew felt his face go slack and the man behind the camera stepped into the pen and placed his box directly in the middle of the group before calmly leaving the shoot. The group was dead silent as they all leaned over to peer down into the box where about fifteen mewling, well and truly awake, kittens were scratching, rolling and playing. Nobody said anything, nobody moved to touch them or take them out, and Andrew felt Neil grab onto the back of his jacket yet again, but this time Andrew could feel his apprehension. Andrew knew that Neil wasn’t very good with animals, he’d never had a pet and he’d never been allowed to stop and play with animals on the street and in the park on the run, and the fact that he’d grown up being taught how to cut up animals left a sour taste in his mouth. Being faced with a litter of very small, very happy looking kittens seemed to be a little alarming for him. Andrew, on the other hand, very much liked animals. He specifically liked cats. They were soft to touch, they made funny noises, and they were ridiculously adorable when they played with toys. Andrew wouldn’t say it aloud, but he wanted a cat. He wasn’t about to ask Olivia for one, or bring one home, but he wanted to.   
“Usually people react with a lot more joy when faced with a litter of kittens,” Laura mused. Dan was the first to break out of her trance.

“We are happy, I think we’re just a little in awe. You don’t tell a group of nine people with our backgrounds that you have a surprise for us and then drop a box of kittens in front of us and not expect us to take a moment just to be relieved,” she explained. She had a point, it summed up Andrew’s own pause.

“Can we touch them?” Renee asked.

“Oh god, yes!” Laura said, waving her hands in a go-on motion. “Take them all out, cuddle, play, react. We’ll turn off the cameras for a minute, I’ll start reading out questions once you’ve, um, all accepted this I guess,” she added. She didn’t sound thrilled by the silent way the old Foxes had responded to the surprise, but she at least had the decency to understand why they’d been acting strange. To this particular group of individuals, surprises weren’t often this cute or small. Andrew hadn’t realised he wasn’t the only one worried.  
Allison reached into the box and pulled out the only grey kitten of the litter, holding it up to her face and when it batted at her nose she visibly melted, all badass energy gone. Matt’s hands were so big, the baby cats so small, he could fit two in one palm and Dan took one from him, putting it on the ground in front of her and letting it attack her shoelaces, making her laugh. Andrew and Neil stayed frozen, staring at their old teammates and the kittens, alternating between the box and their surroundings. Aaron went next, taking out the two black kittens, one in each hand, and putting them on his pillow where they blended in. He looked quietly pleased to have colour coordinated. Renee pulled out the noisiest one, who also happened to be the smallest, and it immediately quietened down at her touch, yawning as if he found enough comfort in her presence and would just fall asleep. Nicky reached in, scooped up three and put them on Kevin’s lap who slowly started to smile. It wasn’t his press smile, it was a real one, and he gave one back to Nicky before scooping up his two calicos and holding them against his chest in a gentle cuddle.

“Are we…” Neil peered closer at the two left in the box, both looking supremely unhappy about being left alone as they scratched up the sides and mewled pitifully. “What do we do with them?” He looked at Andrew with wide eyes. Andrew yanked Neil’s hand off his jacket, unceremoniously pushed him back onto his own pillow and pointed at him in a ‘wait’ gesture. Andrew didn’t feel like talking, he didn’t really have anything to say, but he knew Neil would understand his prodding and pushing. Andrew reached into the box for the last two kittens, one ginger with a white tummy and front paws, the other white with a grey smudge on her nose and tail. Andrew angled his body so he could face Neil, even though it would give the cameras his profile, and crossed his legs at his ankles so his legs made a pen. He put the tabby on the ground in the middle and gestured at Neil to do the same with his own legs. His boyfriend had his eyebrows knitted together and wriggled forward so he was seated on the edge of his cushion, penning his own legs. Andrew put the white and grey one in the middle of his legs and looked up at Neil. He knew that the rest of the group were cooing and talking and giggling as they cuddled, played with and broadcast their kittens, but Andrew was focused on his two and the man in front of him.   
“What do I do with it?” Neil asked quietly, so quiet the mics probably wouldn’t pick it up.

“Whatever you want,” Andrew said back, just as quiet. “Just don’t hurt it.”

“Hurt it?” Neil squeaked. “I don’t want to hurt it!” He wasn’t talking loudly, but he was sounding urgent. Andrew put his fingers on the ground in front of the ginger cat and tapped until he had his attention and watched as it wiggled its tail and pounced, claws and teeth piercing his skin like needles. He flipped the kitten gently onto it’s back and rubbed its white underbelly while it kicked out and batted his hand playfully. Andrew’s entire being relaxed and he let out a long, quiet breath.

“Just try something, Neil,” Andrew said, looking back at him. Neil looked stuck, eyes flittering from the kitten under Andrew’s gentle hand and the one roving around its temporary denim pen. “One man can only have so many issues, it’s a cat.” Neil’s gaze sharpened, feeling the implication behind Andrew’s words, finding the memory attached to them.

“This isn’t a cat, just as much as your keys weren’t just keys,” Neil said lowly. “This is alive, it has a heartbeat, it could get hurt or-”

“Calm,” Andrew said, cutting him off. “If you’re this freaked by a kitten, how are you going to go when Dan has her baby?”

“I never said I was going to hold the baby,” Neil pointed out, glancing back down at the cat on the floor in front of him. Andrew rolled his eyes, releasing the kitten from under his hand, only for it to scamper away, turn tail, and pounce again. Renee emptied the box of the cat toys and one of the handlers came and took the box from the shot. Andrew watched as Neil tentatively touched the top of the kitten’s head. It arched up under his touch, asking for more, and a smile quirked the corner of his lips. “Drew, you do the same th-”

“Finish that sentence and you die,” Andrew interrupted him, fighting the mix of endearment, amusement, embarrassment and affection. He hated him so much, god fucking dammit. “Do not compare me to a kitten.”

“If you say so,” Neil said with a laugh. Andrew watched as Neil slowly loosened up, scratching the kitten until she turned and swiped playfully at him. Neil snatched his hand back in alarm, so Andrew reached for it. He guided Neil’s hand back to the kitten and squeezed tighter and tighter until Neil got the message and wriggled his fingers. He tried to pull his hand back when the kitten pounced, but Andrew kept him still.

“Let it play,” he said seriously. Neil closed his eyes, rested his forehead on Andrew’s shoulder and wriggled his fingers again and when he didn’t flinch away this time, Andrew let go, turning his attention to his own kitten. Renee caught his eye, smiling warmly at Neil pressed against his shoulder as he tried to understand how kittens work. She handed Andrew a red plastic stick that had a mouse toy attached to a long string at one end and he dangled it in front of his kitten. He chased it around, caught it, rolled with it, and batted at it while it swung above him in mid-air. After a minute, Neil lifted his head enough to put his chin on Andrew’s shoulder and look at the cat playing tag with the toy mouse. It took another minute for him to reach for a prop of his own and start paying attention to the white kitten.

“Get it,” Neil urged, dangling his mouse in front of the kitten. “Go on, you can do it!”

“Cameras rolling again!” Laura said, but Andrew ignored her.

“Finally,” Andrew drawled. “He gets the point of kittens.” Neil jeered at him half-heartedly, looking at him from under his eyelashes. Andrew was momentarily distracted by his eyes and startled when the kitten under his hand took a more vicious bite. He shook his hand, glaring first at the cat and then back at Neil for distracting him. Neil ignored that in favour of playing with his kitten’s paws as it tried to climb up his leg. Renee’s giggling caught Andrew’s attention next and he looked over as her kitten started climbing up her shirt and onto her shoulder. There was so much palpable joy in the room and Andrew surveyed the friendly hubbub. Allison’s kitten had fallen asleep in her cupped hands, holding its own tail like a teddy bear and she couldn’t take her eyes off it. Renee was giggling as she tried to dislodge her kitten from her pastel hair. Nicky and Matt were leaning back to back, holding each other up with their legs at acute angles, their kittens on their knees. Dan was playing with her kitten, rolling a ball around the floor, letting it chase it. Kevin had rolled backwards and was lying like a log with one kitten in each hand, held aloft above his face. Aaron was lying on his stomach at eyelevel with his pillow, the two kittens on it play fighting and rolling around.

“Okay, first question is from @letmeloveexy on Twitter,” Laura said. Andrew recognised the handle and looked at Neil with a raised eyebrow. Judging by the shrug, he wasn’t sure if it would be the same person from Tumblr that always seemed to be defending them. “She writes, ‘Neil and Andrew, I don’t care if you’re fighting, I just want to know if you’re happy?’ Which is awfully sweet.”

“Aww, cute!” Allison said, smiling over at Neil, and maybe at Andrew but he couldn’t be sure.

“I’m happy, how could I not be? I’ve got everything I could ever want. More even, than I ever dreamed of,” Neil said. He pulled a face at Andrew, a slight scrunch of his nose and his smile hidden by pinched lips creating dimples he didn’t always have. It was unfortunately adorable, and it was a face he often made when he was trying to get Andrew to do something cutesy like see a movie or walk in the rain solely to ‘try it like the movies’. Andrew didn’t know what Neil wanted him to do and he tilted his head to the side in question. “Answer the question Minyard, are you happy?”

“I’m not sappy like you,” he said. Neil shrugged as if he knew better, which was to say that he did know better but wasn’t going to voice it. Andrew made eye contact with Aaron and then Nicky, remembering their conversation yesterday, before looking back at Laura. “I’m good. And we like your username.”

“We, too, would like to be allowed to just love Exy,” Neil agreed.

“Amen,” Kevin said, lifting a cat in the air like one would lift a glass, still lying on his back.

“I will say, we did get a lot of questions about the rivalry,” Laura said carefully. Andrew didn’t look over at her, instead he looked at Neil and he was looking at Laura with a curious expression.

“So?”

“Well, will you answer any?” She asked. Neil made eye contact with Andrew then and his expression clearly said, ‘has she not been here this entire time?’

“We don’t particularly have anything to say about it,” Andrew cut in before Neil could smart off to her.

“Next question then,” Laura said. “Twitter user @wearingreynolds asked, ‘how did Allison always look amazing even as a competitive athlete? I’m getting too muscly!’”

“Oh!” Allison sounded surprised at being addressed, and when Andrew glanced up from the kitten in his lap, he saw she looked a little unsure as well. “Well, honestly when I started playing Exy I starved myself and it was the worst thing ever for my body so please don’t try that in an attempt to look beautiful. The only thing that worked for me was embracing my muscles! I found outfits that showed off my body how I wanted to. I stopped wanting to fit in with the tiny models who wear clothes a certain way and started choosing for myself.”

“Being muscly isn’t a bad thing to be either. Be capable and strong and good at the sport you love,” Renee added calmly.

“If you’re worried about finding a partner then please don’t put too much stock in something as trivial as how muscly you look,” Dan input.

“I find it hot that my wife could kick my ass,” Matt pointed out.

“Same,” Aaron said, speaking for the first time in a while. He went a little pink around the ears, looking around at the attention that brought him. “Not that Kate’s my wife…”

“I’d say Renee and I are evenly matched, other than the fact that I’ve never learnt to fight, and Renee is well versed,” Allison mused.

“Okay, next question,” Renee said quickly, touching her necklace.

“Sure,” Laura agreed. “Twitter handle @fightthefoxes wants to know…” she trailed off as half the team sniggered at the username.

“Bring it on,” Nicky whooped before dropping a kiss to his kitten’s head.

“She or he would like to know if any of you play sports outside of Exy?” Laura said. There was a silence as the group thought about it, but it was Renee who spoke first.

“I’ve been practicing martial arts now for a few years,” she said. Andrew snorted at her word choice, not because it was wrong, but because it didn’t specify that she’d started martial arts training after graduating even though she knew how to freeform fight and spar better than he did. She smiled innocently over at him.

“Andrew and I box,” Matt said, shifting away from Nicky and the other boy nearly fell back with a squeak before he caught himself with his core muscles and crossed his legs in front of him.

“Technically,” Neil said in a teasing voice. “Andrew just goes to the boxing gym to vent, at least you train,” he told Matt. Andrew leaned over and flicked his boyfriend on the nose. Neil went to argue, but Andrew pointed a warning finger at him, and he closed his mouth. Andrew may not take boxing as seriously as Matt did, but it was something he’d found a little bit of joy in and actually tried to do properly. He had a sparring partner named Jackson, they’d been training together since the week Andrew moved to Chicago, and he was probably the only friend other than Olivia and Renee that Andrew had. The fact that he was stuck with Kevin and related to Nicky and Aaron, and in a relationship with Neil aside.

“I, for one, do nothing of the sort,” Nicky said. “When I stopped playing Exy after graduation I stopped playing sport, period. I go to the gym twice a week and that’s only because my husband drags me with him.”

“All I do is run, nothing else for me other than Exy,” Neil admitted. Most of the old Foxes looked at Neil as if he’d just stated the most obvious thing in the world, except for Nicky who chuckled a short, fond sound.

“I distinctly remember telling you once that Exy can’t be the be all and end all,” he said. Neil rolled his eyes, but there wasn’t much genuine heat in the action.

“No, you told me I needed to find a girlfriend because Exy couldn’t love me back,” Neil reminded him. Andrew hadn’t heard about this conversation and raised his eyebrows in question, but Neil just waved him away. “Freshman year.” Andrew filed it away to ask about later, but it was long enough ago that it didn’t hold much merit, Andrew was just naturally curious about Neil.

“Back when we all had bets on Renee and Andrew getting together,” Nicky added, grinning between Andrew and Renee. In response, Allison pulled Renee and her kitten closer and kissed her cheek, and Andrew met Neil’s gaze out the corner of his eye. The closeted gay man and woman of their team six years ago, now committed to the only people they would ever love. Andrew looked over at Renee and she smiled at him, eyes flashing with happy pride.

“That was never going to happen,” Andrew said. Laura cleared her throat to get their attention and get the interview back on track. At least she was getting lots of candid footage of the group playing with their chosen kittens. Andrew had seen interviews like this before, usually the kittens were let loose and the interviewees cooed over them and let them climb on them or something of the like, but the old team had claimed their own and were holding on. Little fluffy balls of serotonin.

“Next question, @courtnierose is wondering if you guys have any inside jokes or iconic moments you could share,” Laura said. The group looked around at each other, silent conversations as they thought about it and after a moment of this Andrew grew bored and turned all of his attention on the kitten. The tabby little guy crawled up his jeans and onto his lap, rubbing his head on Andrew’s hand.

“As a team, or in pairs? Does it matter?” Dan asked.

“Nope, anything I’m sure,” Laura answered. Nicky put his cat on the ground, and it ran over to one of Kevin’s, which caught Andrew’s attention. He looked over at his cousin who was staring at Neil with a thin-lipped smile.

“’I’m fine’,” he said with exaggerated air quotes. Matt choked on his laugh and Neil pulled a face at the pair of them.

“They have a point,” Andrew said. Allison turned to the camera to give them context.

“When we first got Neil-”

“I am not a pet you all adopted!” Neil cried out, not looking too put out.

“Anyway!” Allison said pointedly. “When we first got Neil, he said ‘I’m fine’ to literally everything, even though he was as far from fine as you can possibly be.”

“Look, it was a rough year,” Neil said.

“A rough life,” Kevin said from the floor. Neil pointed at him in agreement, rethought that move and picked up his kitten, making her point at Kevin with her paw.

“It got better,” he said. Kevin made a funny hand gesture Andrew had seen him make at Neil a few times before, but Neil was the only who could understand it. He did, snorting with laughter and turning his attention back to the group, holding his kitten to his chest. Andrew blew a stream of air out of his mouth, widening his eyes down at the kitten in silent admonishment to their conversation. He remembered feeling this same fascination and misunderstanding in his stomach throughout college, when the two of them bounced off each other with half sentences, movements, and eye contact. Often it was Exy related fanaticism or just working as a team on the court.

“Oh, what about…” Allison broke into an explanation of an inside joke between the girls and Matt who fell about laughing, but a quick glance at Andrew’s family suggested they didn’t know about it either. As the laughter dissolved and Laura waited patiently to see if they were done for her to continue, Andrew remembered another iconic moment, an inside joke of sorts, that would cause a reaction worth watching.

“You know, I get it,” he said in a deadpan voice. Kevin sat up so fast his kitten’s claws dug into his shirt in alarm. Kevin looked horrified and mildly traumatised. Matt, Dan and Nicky burst out laughing and Aaron smirked at Andrew, nodding once in amused support. Allison and Renee looked torn between being amused and scandalised by the memory, but Neil, Andrew’s favourite person in the entire world, grinned at Andrew.

“Being raised as a superstar must be really, really difficult for you. Always a commodity, never a human being, not a single person in your family thinking you're worth a damn off the court—yeah, sounds rough,” he recited. Kevin moaned as if the words brought him physical pain, trying to pry the kitten’s claws from his clothes.

“Blah blah, something about intricate daddy issues?” Aaron supplied. Kevin shot him a reproachful look and then sliced it to Neil. It was a clear warning that the pair of them were still, technically, under Moriyama thumb and should watch what they said, but Neil looked so gleeful and Riko was well and truly dead, Andrew wasn’t about to put a stop to it.

“I know it's not entirely your fault that you are mentally unbalanced and infected with these delusions of grandeur, and I know you're physically incapable of holding a decent conversation with anyone like every other normal human being can, but I don't think any of us should have to put up with this much of your bullshit.” Andrew’s memory wasn’t the only reason he knew Neil’s speech that slaughtered Riko in front of his Raven’s at the banquet his freshman year, but he knew it so clearly because he’d recited it to himself over and over again both high on his medication and sober that year. Neil had, for a very significant moment, taken Andrew by surprise and shown more spine than he’d known him to be capable of. Andrew had already been somewhat infatuated with Neil, but every time he’d stood up to Riko when Andrew was a witness had stirred something deep in his stomach.   
Kevin groaned again, this time in resignation, freeing his kitten’s claws.

“Pity only gets you so many concessions, and you used yours up about six insults ago. So please, please, just shut the fuck up and leave us alone,” Kevin said, sounding defeated. Dan was leaning on Matt as she laughed, holding her stomach. Matt had his arm around her, shoulders shaking with laughter and Nicky wiped away tears.

“Kevin’s reaction just now,” he wheezed. “Looked like you electrocuted him! ‘You know, I get it’!”

“Don’t get me wrong, it was not funny the first time,” Dan said, straightening up.

“Not funny, but I was so proud of him,” Matt agreed.

“For context, that little show was a reproduction of Neil roasting the shit out of R-”

“Ally,” Kevin warned at the same time as Renee put a gentle hand on her forearm.

“Roasting someone we used to play against… it was a very dramatic night,” she finished.

“We used to say ‘you know, I get it’ to Kevin all the time, his reaction doesn’t grow old,” Nicky told Laura and her camera.

“Okay, next question is from @lukecrown, he is asking what happened between Andrew and Neil, why Andrew hates Neil…” Laura said. She clearly knew she was crossing a line after they’d denied commenting, but she was hopeful.

“I have nothing to say,” Neil mused. Andrew lolled his head to the side with a sigh and looked at him with a blank expression. Neil met his blank stare with a patient one of his own and Andrew considered how to play this. Blow the question off like he had, or answer it honestly.

“Why do I hate you?” Andrew asked him.

“You’ve never explained the logic,” Neil said.

“No, and I won’t start today,” he said. Neil nodded as if he’d expected that and looked over his head at Laura.

“We’re good, next question,” he said dismissively. Laura, smart enough, decided not to pry.

*

After they’d finished the interview, Neil handed his phone to Allison and pulled Andrew in for a deep, loving kiss that made Andrew sink a little, eyes closed. When Neil pulled back, he handed Andrew the kitten in his hand and took his phone back, snapping a second picture just of Andrew.   
“Two hundred and thirty percent,” Andrew muttered. Neil smiled playfully, petting his kitten one more time on the head, and followed Allison off the set, leaving Andrew to put the kittens back in the box with their siblings.


	19. "He's A Narcistic Asshole."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil's first game!  
> Anyone remember Gorilla?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: Use of homophobic slurs

Neil didn’t like the way his coach was staring at him. Half the team, the subs mostly, were sitting on the home bench as the starting line sorted themselves into their order to enter the court. It was Neil’s first game as a Scorpion, and by that, he was just a new recruit like Dante and Lulu and they were merely subs. Goalkeepers were usually the only recruits who ever saw game time without someone being injured, taking turns to play halves, but the other positions were often filled by starting lines, second string and subs. After Andrew’s starting goalie was injured, he’d had to play full games without a sub, but he managed. Neil would be waiting out the games on the home court benches trying not to wish injury on his team. The Scorpions’ first game of the season was against a team from Texas that Neil didn’t really follow in the league because they weren’t the best. They were known for being jerks though, playing dirty and mean. Olivia, Laila and Grace resented the team with a burning passion because of the lewd, leery things the male players said to the women players of their team and opposition teams, and in particular the gross things they said to Laila and Grace about their sexuality and relationship.   
“Can I help you?” Neil asked his coach. Fierro looked thoughtful and intent, his gaze hadn’t waved from Neil for a solid two minutes as he considered. Neil’s question seemed to wake him up and he straightened, clapping his hands for attention from his team.

“Right, I have an unconventional idea that is probably going to work,” he said. Neil frowned at him, but his curiosity was peaked.

“It’s literally the first game, can you not?” Harmony groaned, leaning on her racquet from her place in the starting line.

“Listen,” Coach Fierro said with a laugh. “We’re going to put The Spitfire on the court at the end of first and start of second half.”

“Excuse me?” Harmony demanded, shooting a withering look at Neil. Neil realised that he was the spitfire and his eyes widened. He hated the nickname, but if it meant he got to play then he would stomach it for a little while.

“You want me on the court?”

“For the last ten minutes, and the first ten minutes,” Fierro said. Twenty minutes of play was not a lot for a game that went for an hour and a half, but Neil didn’t care. He grinned and nodded his head, excitement coiling in his veins.

“Why?” Harmony demanded.

“He’s fast, and he has some sneaky footwork, I don’t see a problem letting him run himself ragged for twenty minutes to try help our point gap or at least piss off the opposition,” Fierro explained. Neil felt a spark of pride and sent a silent, somewhat reluctant, thanks to Kevin for his incessant practice of Raven footwork.

“Pissing people off is my specialty,” Neil said, making Oscar laugh from his place in line. Dante, who knew how annoying Neil was from living with him for six months, put a hand on his shoulder with a snort.

“I can vouch,” he agreed. As irritating as Neil supposedly was with his questions, secrets and habits born from his childhood, Dante had become a friend as well as a reliable team member.

“Alright, you guys ready?” Fierro asked his starting line. Neil sat back on the bench, bouncing a little with excitement and nerves, ready to count down the first thirty-five minutes of the game and hope he didn’t screw up when his time came.

When the time came, the Scorpions were in the lead by two points and Fierro sent Neil on with a request Neil make it a four- or five-point lead. In ten minutes, that was doubtful, but Neil was rearing to give it his best go. Harmony was called off to let him on and she shot him a scathing look that made Neil smile. He walked to his starting position on the half court line, his backliner mark giving him a slow once over as the announcer called the switch.   
“Interesting play,” he said. Neil ignored him, getting ready to do what he did best. Run.   
Neil scored once in the first eight minutes, bringing the score to six three in the Scorpions’ favour. With two minutes left on the clock, Neil was getting desperate to at least score once more, and the Scorpion’s defensive side were giving it their all to try and prevent the Texas team from scoring. Neil was having a blast, especially as he got deeper under his backliner’s skin. Neil didn’t even have to speak, the big, bulky man marking Neil was easy for Neil to leave in the dust and scoot under or around him. Neil was genuinely considering trying to slide between his legs from the ground when the ball came his way. Well, it sailed well past him at an impossible speed and Neil bolted after it as fast as he could. He snatched it up in his racquet, looked for his fellow striker who was a few steps too far away to be useful, so Neil faced the goal, didn’t think, and fired. The goal flared red and Neil put his stick in the air in triumph as one of his teammates came to his side, smiling at him through his helmet.

“Nice shot, Spitfire,” he said. Neil groaned at the name but clacked their sticks together. Neil went back to his starting position and took a deep breath. One-minute left. They were winning by four points. The game was theirs, they just had to manage the gap. The opposition dealer served away from Neil towards their goal and Neil threw himself in his backliner’s path so he couldn’t run forward and help. His mark slammed into him, going too fast and too heavy to stop, and they sprawled across the ground. Neil had been prepared for it and he rolled away, minimising impact points and potential for injury. He rolled to his feet and hit the ground running, but the bastard of a player on the ground shoved his hand out and Neil tripped, hitting the ground. It knocked the wind out of him, and he bit his tongue hard enough to bleed, but Neil didn’t stop. He was up on his feet at the same time as his backliner and cut him off yet again, but this time his backliner grabbed Neil by his jersey and threw him into the plexiglass wall.

“Fuck off, twink,” he snarled. Neil’s blood went cold, and he saw red. He shoved the backliner back, but his mark was taller and stronger, and Neil recognised him with a dizzying smack as he stared through their helmet safety grates.

“Gorilla?” Neil panted, pinned against the glass again. Hawking, the man who’d had a vendetta against Seth and Kevin way back in Neil’s freshman year, first game even, made a growling noise.

“Get the fuck out of my way, faggot,” he snapped.

“Piss off you overgrown primate,” Neil shot back, shoving again. A whistle was blown as their scuffle was picked up by the referees and Hawking was pulled off him by his teammates, his pale blue eyes flashing with resentment.

“Fuck you and your Foxes!” Gorilla yelled as he was hauled away with a yellow card.

“You good?” Oscar asked, coming to Neil’s side.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Neil said, but he ran a mental check of his body to make sure he meant it and came back clean.

“I saw the video Neil, are you actually fine?” Oscar pressed. Neil rolled his eyes and shook Oscar’s concerned hand off his shoulder, mentally cursing Nicky for his joke during the kitten interview.

“I’m fine, just bit my tongue,” Neil promised. Oscar nodded once, clacked their sticks, and Neil took possession of the ball for his foul throw at home goal. He scored easily, not necessarily feeling satisfied by the easy goal, but he did feel vindicated.

*

Neil scored once more, this time in the second half, and the team won their first game of the season by six points. Neil had watched the last thirty-five minutes of the game on the edge of his seat, and when they were allowed back on the court to celebrate, he was the first one through the doors. Oscar had been subbed off for the second half and Dante hadn’t seen any game time, and they were close on his heels as they ran to their cheering team. McKenna caught Neil in a breathless, laughing hug that Neil had not been expecting and he froze in his captain’s cheerful embrace. Oscar, Dante and Lulu joined in a group hug, people Neil had come to consider friends, and he relaxed enough to rally back their cheers. They untangled and stood together, arms over shoulders and around waists, jumping and yelling and Neil felt like he was floating. Lulu ruffled his hair, flashing a fierce, proud smile in his direction and he shook his sweaty hair out. She hadn’t seen any game time either, but that didn’t actually seem to bother her, she seemed willing to wait to prove she belonged there, and he was a little impressed by that. Neil had explained to her that he was in a relationship, leaving out the specifics, and apologised for not telling her that when she’d asked him out. It had taken her a little over two weeks to come to terms with that, but she’d been the one to make a move for friendship shortly after and Neil had been grateful for it. When the group herded each other off the court, Fierro did a funny little victory dance and put his arm around McKenna like a proud dad hugging his son after a Little League game, not that Neil would know what that looked like.   
“I fucking love you, Scorpions!” Fierro cheered. “Alright you little shits, we’re putting McKenna and Josten in front of the cameras, rest of you clean up and meet in the lounge for debriefing!” He yelled.

“Excuse me?” Neil asked, stilling his celebration.

“You heard me, go do your thing,” Fierro said, letting go of the captain. McKenna made a face at his coach before jerking his chin in the direction of the press gallery, eyes on Neil.

“What about me?” Harmony asked, pouting pettily.

“Thanks for the offer,” Fierro said easily, “but they’ve got it.” That dismissal of the tall striker made Neil feel better about his new role and followed McKenna to the horde of reporters taking flashing pictures of the pair. They slid onto the bench and McKenna took charge, calling out the reporters and answering most of their questions. Some of the reporters asked Neil for his comment on his short stint, asked him how he was feeling after his first game, wanted to know what it was like to be playing as a pro and Neil answered with his usual quick, impersonal responses. They stayed out there without incident for nearly twelve minutes before a familiar person stood and demanded attention from McKenna. Al Bowing, the one who had probably accidentally started the rivalry rumours a year and a half ago, was not someone Neil particularly wanted to hear from.

“Neil Josten, I’m Al Bowing, do you care to comment on the remarks Hawking made during your scuffle on the court today?” He asked. Neil frowned, tilting his head.

“What comments?” He asked. Al Bowing awkwardly looked down at his notes and then back up at Neil.

“He called you some offensive names, alluded to your sexuality… it was picked up by court microphones,” he explained. Neil laughed drily.

“Gorilla, as we referred to him way back when, has had a thing against the Foxes strikers since before I was even a freshman. He doesn’t know me personally; he was just being a jerk. No harm, no foul, winning tonight was satisfaction enough,” he said.

“So, you’re saying he had no reason to call you those names other than spite?” Al asked. Neil narrowed his eyes at him.

“There is no good reason to call anyone a ‘twink’ and a ’faggot’,” Neil put the words in air quotes, “and if anyone watching tonight was effected by hearing Hawking’s language then make sure you’re heard by his management and the ERC. I personally think it was uncalled for and he should be penalised.” Neil stopped because McKenna put a placating hand on his arm.

“Any more questions?” McKenna called.

“I’m Julia Black from Buzzfeed,” a woman said and both McKenna and Neil groaned, but she spoke anyway. “Neil, you spent a weekend in LA with your old team recently. How was it to be back in easy reach of Andrew Minyard?”

“Are you… are you asking if he hit me?” Neil asked incredulously.

“No, but did he?” She asked excitedly.

“No, he didn’t,” Neil said. “It was fine, the entire weekend was a good time. Allison took me shopping, we all went out on Saturday night, and Nicky brought gifts back with him from Germany. It was nice being back with family.”

“That includes Minyard?” She pressed. Neil’s calm was melting.

“Yes, it includes everyone who is or was a Fox while I was at Palmetto State,” he said firmly. She opened her mouth to ask more, probably wanting to dig insults for Andrew out of Neil, but he didn’t want to entertain her. He wanted to shower and change out, listen to Fierro about the game and then go back home with Dante to rewatch the game.  
“We’re done here,” he snapped. “McKenna?”

“We’re done,” he agreed and followed Neil out of the gallery to the lockers.

“You don’t hate Andrew, do you?” McKenna hedged. Neil smiled softly and shook his head.

“No, I don’t.”

“It didn’t look like it in the interviews,” he said.

“You watched those?” Neil asked. McKenna laughed and nodded his head.

“Secretly, I am a huge fan of Kevin Day… I watch anything he does,” he said awkwardly. Neil rolled his eyes and pushed the locker room door open.

“He’s a narcissistic asshole,” Neil said.

“I figured as much, I have played against him a few times now,” he confirmed. “But he likes you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Neil said, waving it away. “We’re brothers, he got used to me.”

“Those videos, it might look to everyone else that you and Minyard don’t like each other… but you were barely an inch apart the entire time and always turning towards to each other and sharing looks. You aren’t lying when you say you’re not friends, but it’s not really the truth either is it?”

“Oh?” Neil asked, turning around slowly to face his captain. “What makes you an expert on body language?”

“I majored in psychology at college, I nearly did my masters instead of going pro. As it is, I have my honours. I notice things,” he answered, looking a little sheepish. Neil hadn’t known this about his captain, but it wasn’t really that surprising.

“Good to know,” he mused. “You’re also right, Andrew and I aren’t friends, but we aren’t enemies either.”

“Why are you here then, and not a Lion?”

“The Lions didn’t want me,” Neil admitted. “Besides, not everyone plays on the same team as their partners.”

“No, but it’s more common than not. If the Lions try to recruit you from us, will you go?” McKenna asked. Neil didn’t really know what to do with that question and sat down on the bench in the locker room, slowly taking off his shoes and socks.

“Probably,” he said after a long moment. “I would like to play with Andrew, be in the same state as him. The distance… it’s hard.” McKenna didn’t look surprised and he put an affectionate hand on his shoulder.

“I get you,” he said. “No hard feelings, just give us what you’ve got while we have you?”

“You got it,” Neil promised, smiling up at him. McKenna smiled back and went to his own locker to get changed out and shower. Neil felt like a weight on his shoulders had lifted, one he hadn’t even known was there. He would fight tooth and nail for the Scorpions while he played for them, but he wasn’t scared to admit he wanted to join the Lions. He wanted to move to Chicago with Andrew, and he would get there eventually. He just hoped he would be able to keep Oscar, Dante, and even Lulu and McKenna as friends when that happened. Harmony, perhaps, Neil could live without.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I have 7 more chapters completed to be uploaded, but I have been pretty sick over the past couple of days and haven't written much more (and I had a group assignment that sucked ass).  
> I am continuing to write, this is no way a pre-emptive cancel of this fic, just a warning that in a week the updates might not be every day and more so every other day :')


	20. "I'm Not A Bachelor."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sad bois hating the distance.   
> Fluffy and cute as per usual with a side order of sexy times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to the person who reads this in their Spanish class, you the real MVP. However, this is a long fic, so get some work done first :') 
> 
> Also big thanks to all those who leave comments on chapters as they read, and thank you to those who find this and sit and read it one go you guys amaze me. I appreciate you.  
> I appreciate all of you though let's be honest, you're all so kind!!!!!!! 
> 
> Heads up: Mature scene/s in this chapter.

Andrew hadn’t seen Neil in two and a half months outside of a screen. It had been ten weeks since the interview in LA, and nine weeks since games had started for the pro leagues, and in that time neither of their schedules had matched up near each other. Andrew could feel it like a constant dull ache behind his ribs, something missing, and something needed. He wouldn’t be able to tell when he’d gone from not needing anything to needing Neil, but it had been a long time ago and this was the most amount of time they’d gone without seeing each other since his stay in Easthaven his sophomore year.   
This was the only reason why he was sitting in his car at the O’Hare airport of Chicago pickup at two thirty in the morning on a Saturday. Neil had flown into Texas to play against the Pythons Friday morning and as far as Andrew had figured, he would check into a hotel with the rest of his team, go to the stadium, play his part of the game, celebrate with his team and go back to the hotel. Andrew had watched the press interview after the game with concern churning in his stomach because there was something wrong with Neil. He wasn’t smiling, or even scowling, at the press, he looked deflated and tired, and every snide comment he made had more heat and intent to hurt in it than he usually did.   
Almost immediately after he’d walked offscreen, Andrew’s phone had rung.   
“Hey baby, what’s wrong?” Andrew had demanded in lieu of a usual greeting.

“I’m going to change out and catch a cab to the airport, can you pick me up from O’Hare at two thirty? It’s the earliest I can get in,” he’d asked, voice nearly too quiet to hear him. Andrew had a home game on Saturday so he was in Chicago for the entire weekend, he had no issues.

“Yeah, I can do that,” he agreed, not caring about the time.

“Can you take me back to the airport Tuesday morning?”

“Yes.” Andrew didn’t ask about Neil’s Monday training, just told him to be safe and that he’d see him soon.

At two thirty-seven, Andrew saw Neil walking across the carpark towards him, shivering in his old Foxes windbreaker and grey sweatpants tucked into scuffed trainers. He had his duffel bag over one shoulder and his sport bag with a training stick strapped to it over the other, but the rest of his gear must have been with his team. He had his phone in one hand, a magazine in the other, and his eyes were sunken and ringed with exhaustion. Andrew popped the trunk of his car and climbed out of the driver’s side to meet Neil at the back of the car. His boyfriend was so exhausted from his flights and the game and whatever else was weighing him down that he couldn’t lift either bag high enough to get it into the trunk and Andrew had to take them and do it for him. Once his belongings were stowed away, Neil turned towards Andrew and held onto him under his arms. Andrew wrapped his arms around Neil and waited for a long moment, both of them shivering in the cold wind of Chicago under the lights of the airport parking lot.   
“Two and a half months is too many months,” Neil murmured tiredly when he pulled back.

“I agree,” Andrew said. “Can I take you home now before we freeze?”

“Home,” Neil repeated. “Yes, you can.” He went around to the passenger’s seat and climbed in and Andrew followed his lead and climbed behind the wheel.

“What’s with the magazine?” Andrew asked, knowing it wasn’t something Neil would usually read voluntarily. Neil’s smile was slow and sleepy, but there was something about it that made Andrew feel uneasy. He wasn’t going to like Neil’s reason.

“You’re on the cover,” he said. Andrew hadn’t expected that, and he started the car while frowning at him. “I bought it in Texas, I read it on the plane. You’re Fiona PR lady made a mistake,” he said.

“What do you mean?” Andrew asked, putting the car in gear and getting them moving.

“You told me last month you were going to be sitting for a shoot and an interview yeah?” Neil said. Andrew hummed in confirmation. He’d agreed to do the shoot and a brief interview if they didn’t ask questions about his past and if he could wear his bands, all of which was agreed to and met on the day. The questions had been borderline trivial, and Andrew had barely given them a response, he’d honestly pushed it from mind. He hadn’t expected to be put on the cover, he hadn’t even asked what publication the interview was for, trusting Fiona to make the right decisions after she had yet to fail him in over a year. Andrew hadn’t done a photoshoot or an interview before that, but it hadn’t been too painful and agreed to do more if this one didn’t fuck up. Andrew was wondering if maybe it had fucked up.  
“Do you know what it was for?” Neil asked.

“No, I never asked,” Andrew said dismissively, even though the curiosity was eating a hole in his stomach.

“Can you wait until tomorrow when I am awake enough to appreciate your reaction?” Neil asked him. Andrew hesitated and glanced at him quickly. He was tired and clutching the magazine like a child might clutch a teddy bear.

“Yes, fine,” Andrew conceded.

Neil fell asleep before they got to Andrew and Olivia’s apartment and with Herculean strength and withstanding his own exhaustion, Andrew carried Neil and both of his bags into the building, in the elevator, down the hall and into his room. The bags were discarded, the phone and magazine were placed face down on the bedside table, and Neil mumbled incoherently as Andrew unzipped the windbreaker and threw it over the chair in the corner of the room. Neil was shirtless underneath, no wonder he’d been so cold in the wind and his skin cold to the touch. Andrew wrenched off the sneakers, not trying to be gentle, but trying to be quick, and then covered Neil in his comforter. Neil mumbled what could have been either ‘thank you’ or ‘love you’ and Andrew changed into his own sleep clothes. When he turned off the lights and climbed into his bed, Neil was well and truly asleep again, but that didn’t stop the blue-eyed man from rolling over and curling into Andrew’s side, his arm over his waist. Andrew rolled over, his back to Neil, and wriggled to be pressed up against him. Andrew felt something settle into place behind his ribs and the aching disappeared. When he closed his eyes, he found peace and safety in the dark, his hand holding Neil’s.

*

Andrew woke up violently. There was a hand on his waist, lips at his neck and legs curled around him. He threw his elbow back and rolled off the bed before he was fully conscious, but his elbow found only air and a startled panting laugh behind him made him whirl around. Neil was standing on the other side of the bed, hands up in surrender and an awkward smile on his face.

"Morning, sunshine," Neil said. Andrew hooked his hands behind his head and let his heart settle down before speaking. Neil took that time to climb back into bed.

"I didn't get you?" Andrew checked.

"Nah, I was already awake. I felt you stir and started moving. I figured it was coming," he said, burrowing under the blankets. Fair assumption, the first morning or two after sharing a bed with Neil again for the first time in a while was a readjustment period for Andrew. Neil had copped a few elbows in the stomach his last year at Palmetto before he'd learnt to move again. Andrew didn't say anything to Neil, just put his knees against his bed and leaned forward, peering down into his face. His curly auburn hair was crushed from sleep and he had creases in his cheek from where he'd slept against Andrew's tee shirt. He looked cute and comfortable, and ten times happier than he'd looked yesterday. Andrew still wasn't used to being that important to someone and he tilted his head to one side as he looked down at him. Neil took the appraisal in stride, just stretched out with a moan and covered his mouth with his elbow to yawn. He rolled his shoulders and winced, rubbing his left one gingerly and trying to crack his neck. One of the good things that they had in common, Andrew had decided long ago, was that neither of them moved once they were asleep. They found a spot and they stayed there, even if that meant they woke up every morning stiff, but it made sharing a bed easier for the both of them. If they weren’t still they would both wake up every time the other moved throughout the night, and it was possible they'd both wake up violently. When he was done, he looked up at Andrew with a morning soft smile and did those stupid grabby hands that made Andrew puddle internally. He scowled at Neil and got back on the bed.

"Two hundred percent," he grumbled, rolling over to lie half on Neil, his face against his neck. He traced lines up and down Neil's neck with his nose while his boyfriend laughed and wrapped him up in a hug. Andrew had since learned that he 'stimmed' when he did things such as rub Neil's neck like this, or tugged his hair or clicked his pen, and it was only in the past six months that he'd felt comfortable enough to do it. Andrew knew Neil had worked it out too, he hadn't been as sneaky about his research as he thought he was. He'd even started giving Andrew things to chew on or fidget with when he thought he might need it. Andrew always told him to fuck off, but he used them anyway.

"I thought I'd be closer to three hundred percent by now," Neil mused.

"You lose some points every time you tell Kevin to fuck off," Andrew muttered against his skin. Neil laughed and ran his fingertips along Andrew's side, making him shiver. "Stop," Andrew said quietly. Normally he didn't mind Neil's idle touching on his skin, he'd gotten past his initial discomfort the more he'd come to trust him, but he was already feeling overstimulated from his aggressive wake up, hence his self-soothing habit of nuzzling against Neil's neck. Neil immediately stopped what he was doing and put his hands above Andrew's sleep shirt, holding him tight enough to be comfortable without being restricting. Andrew pressed a chaste, thank you kiss behind his ear and went back to calming down. Neil, to his credit, started to fall back to sleep. Andrew didn't have to be at the stadium until six that night for his seven o'clock home game, so after his heart had settled down to a regular rhythm and his skin didn't feel like it was going to crawl away from him, he let himself fall asleep too.

*

Next time Andrew woke, it was to Olivia knocking on the door.

"Boys? Uh, men?" She called. Andrew rolled away from Neil and off the bed and Neil covered his face with the blanket.

"Yes?" Andrew asked, opening the door for her.

"You said you'd go for a run with me this morning," she hedged. Andrew had said that, but it had been at dinner time the day before, when he'd not been summoned out of his house at 2am and ended up carrying a man back into said house. He scowled at her and she shrugged without much apology in the movement. "It's nine, I let it go as long as I could," she said.

"I hate you," Andrew said.

"He says that to me all the time, he doesn't mean it!" Neil's voice was muffled from the covers over his face, but the message was clear. In response, Andrew picked up one of Neil's trainers from where they'd ended up near the door from yesterday and threw it at him. Neil grunted as it landed on his stomach and Andrew turned back to Olivia who had her eyebrows raised at this fine display of their relationship.   
"You gave her your word!" Neil called out, clearly not learning his lesson, and Andrew picked up the second shoe. "Don't you fucking dare!" Neil said, his voice clearer this time. Andrew glanced over and saw him sitting up in the bed, eyes narrowed at him and pointing at the shoe. Andrew stared blankly at him for a second and then, again, looked at a vaguely curious and mildly unimpressed housemate.

"Be ready to go in ten?" She said.

"Can I come?" Neil asked. Olivia smiled past Andrew at Neil.

"Sure!" She agreed. Andrew sighed and closed the door on her, leaning against it to look at Neil.

"Can I have my other shoe?" Neil asked, hand out to catch it. Andrew, in response, dropped it back to the floor and went to his wardrobe for his running clothes. Neil made an unimpressed noise and got off the bed. Andrew pulled on a pair of sweatpants that said 'fuck off' across the ass and when he bent down to roll them up so he didn't trip on the run, Neil howled with laughter.  
"Where did you get those?" He crowed and Andrew ignored him in favour of putting on a Lions jersey that was long enough to cover the words on his ass.   
"No seriously, where'd you get them?" Neil asked again when Andrew turned around.

"Olivia ordered them online for training, but they didn't fit her," Andrew said. Neil burst out laughing again, nearly falling as he pulled his second shoe on.

"Was it too big or too small for her?" He asked. Olivia was half a foot taller than Andrew was and her waist was tinier than his, but it usually evened out and sometimes they could fit each other's clothes. Andrew had been intrigued and mortified when he'd realised that they could swap clothes and had neglected to mention it to Neil up until this point.

"They're too big around her waist, sat too low on her hips apparently," Andrew replied. They sat low on Andrew's hips too, but that was because they were built for a girl's hip to waist ratio.

"This is the best day of my life," Neil said, straightening up and grinning at Andrew as if he meant it. He was standing shirtless in Scorpion training shorts and his running shoes, his hair a mess and his eyes shadowed from not enough sleep, but he looked happy and he was here.

"Get a shirt on, we're leaving in five," Andrew told him.

"I want to wear that one," he said, pointing at Andrew. Andrew looked down at the yellow jersey he had on and then flicked an unimpressed look at him.

"The one I'm wearing?"

"Yep."

"Dare I ask, why?"

"You're wearing Livia's pants, I'll wear your jersey, she can wear mine," he said. Andrew blinked at him and tried to process that.

"Why?" He repeated.

"Why not?" Neil shot back. Andrew couldn't exactly argue with that logic because it was his own, still, he was curious.

"You want to run through Chicago in a yellow shirt with a number three on your back?"

"It also says Minyard on it," Neil pointed out. "And yeah, why wouldn't I? I'm pretty sure ninety percent of my hoodies are yours."

"I'm aware," Andrew said with a scowl. "You've had my black one for years," he added before taking off his shirt, balling it up and throwing it at him. Neil's grin was content and satisfied and Andrew turned away from it to get another shirt. In the bottom of his wardrobe something orange peeked out and he yanked on it until it came free. A Fox's Jersey, faded from years of being lovingly worn, a ten on the back under 'Josten'. Andrew held it in his hands, contemplating, and after a long moment he pulled it on.

"You're not wearing anything that belongs to you," Neil commented when Andrew turned around. As usual, Andrew's jersey was a size or two too big for Neil to accommodate Andrew's shoulders and it hung off Neil's frame in a box, reminding Andrew of when he first met Neil. He had his bands on, his sneakers and was running a hand through his mop of hair, smiling fondly at Andrew.

"This," Andrew said, tugging on the jersey he was wearing which was tight across his shoulders and chest and short enough to show off the words across his ass, "is mine now."

"Whatever," Neil said with no heat. He swiped up his Scorpion training shirt and went in search of Olivia to beg her to join in with their clothing swap for whatever enjoyment Neil was finding in it. In his absence, Andrew pulled his bands on over his old scars and dug his feet into his running shoes. When Neil returned, he had a silly smile on his face and in his hands were two baseball caps. One was grey, the other black and he held the latter out for Andrew. He stared at it quizzically and Neil waved it around in silent demand for him to take it.

"Why?"

"Olivia said she'd wear my shirt if we wore the hats to ward off a potential media shit storm. She wanted to run in relative peace," he said. Andrew could get behind that and took the cap, putting the strap between his teeth so he could tie up his identifiable long hair before wedging it under the hat. Neil pulled his over his curls and low over his distinctive blue eyes to cast them and the scars on his cheeks in shadow. They couldn't do much about their bands, choosing to wear those instead of exposing their scars to the media, but it was as camouflaged as they could get whilst wearing bright orange and yellow with each other's names across their backs.

They met Olivia at the door, and because both her and Andrew had on women's pants, Neil was the only one with pockets- a fact that annoyed Andrew greatly- so he took Andrew's apartment key and buried it deep.

"Nice pants," Olivia quipped as Neil locked the door behind them.

"Fuck off," Andrew said.

"Yeah, exactly!" She agreed cheerily. He flicked her an unamused look, but nearly jumped out of his skin when Neil grabbed onto his bicep suddenly. He yanked his arm away and put his fingers to his pulse point in his neck to feel his racing heart, narrowing his eyes at him. Neil looked a little sheepish and much slower put his hand around Andrew's bicep.

"Sorry, wasn't thinking," he said. "I just remembered the magazine from the plane! Don't forget to remind me to read it to you when we get back."

"Oh, true. Sure," Andrew agreed, lowering his hand from his neck. He'd been distracted by other things since they'd woken up, he'd temporarily forgotten the magazine he was apparently featured in. Curiosity started eating him up again and he decided to make the run as short as possible.

*

 _An hour run._   
They ran for eight and a half miles without stopping and when they got back to the apartment, Andrew was borderline homicidal. Olivia liked running, she found it peaceful and cathartic. Neil had been running his entire life and didn’t know how to go slow. Andrew was a goalie who could bench press twice Neil’s entire body weight plus his armour, but God he was not built to run. Olivia and Neil high fived each other while they stretched in the living room, getting their breath back slowly but surely. Andrew sprawled out on the kitchen floor and told them to go fuck themselves when they tried to coerce him into stretching.   
“Coach will kill me if you injure yourself tonight because you didn’t stretch,” Olivia complained.

“If you don’t leave me alone, I’ll kill you myself,” Andrew said in a mock cheery voice. Neil made a funny noise and Andrew flicked an annoyed look at him.

“You haven’t used that tone of voice in a long time,” Neil commented. “Let him cool down on his own,” he warned Olivia. Smart man. That’s why Andrew kept him around. He looked back up at the ceiling, trying to fill his damaged lungs with air and regretted his life of smoking.   
It didn’t take too long to get his breath back, he was a pro athlete after all, but he didn’t move for about five minutes and when he did move it was just to put his arm over his eyes to shield them from the ceiling light. The shower cut on down the hall in Olivia’s bathroom and he heard Neil’s light footsteps come into the kitchen and then the click of his knees as he dropped down to a crouch beside him.

“What do you want?” Andrew asked him.

“To bring you water,” Neil answered. Andrew felt a plastic water bottle touch the fingers of his hand on the floor and he took it from his boyfriend.

“I hate you both, what the fuck even was that?” He asked, pulling himself into a seated position.

“You could have slowed down, you didn’t have to keep up,” Neil told him. Andrew scoffed and put the bottle to his lips. He guzzled half the bottle before speaking.

“Over my dead body,” he said. Neil’s smile was small and amused.

“Looks like it might have to be,” he teased. Andrew glared at him, but Neil didn’t even have the audacity to flinch. “You good?”

“Fuck, I hate running,” Andrew muttered, lips against the water bottle. He finished it, threw it at Neil who caught it and tossed it up and over, so it landed in the sink without looking. Andrew considered pushing him over.

“Are you going to stretch before you completely cool down?” Neil asked. Andrew groaned dramatically, but climbed to his feet and started stretching, glaring daggers at Neil as he did so. Neil seemed satisfied by this and left him to it, knowing better than to hover around Andrew when he was feeling this annoyed and defeated.   
When he was done, he felt a little better and sought Neil out again, finding him on the floor of the bedroom with his eyes half closed, wearing nothing except socks. Andrew was torn between lying down next to him, lying on top of him and kissing him, walking back out again or scooping him up and taking him to the shower. He chose to close the door and stand there staring and wait for Neil to do something. Neil didn’t move and Andrew lost the waiting game.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Andrew asked. Neil lolled his head to the side to look at him.

“I was going to have a shower but decided to wait and see if you wanted to have one with me,” he said. “So, here I am. Waiting.”

“Get off the floor,” Andrew told him. He was too used to Neil; he didn’t even have it in him to be incredulous about his strange decision to just lie on the floor naked while he waited. Neil didn’t even have anything to keep himself busy while he waited. No phone, no book, nothing to fidget with or focus on. Andrew didn’t understand, but he didn’t have to question it anymore, it was just how Neil was.

“You going to shower with me?” Neil asked, hopping to his feet silently and easily. He was so bouncy, even after their run. Andrew’s body felt heavy, although granted he did feel more awake thanks to the endorphin rush.

“Yes,” Andrew told him. Neil smiled and Andrew went and fetched him a towel to put around his waist so he wasn’t streaking through the apartment.

At about eleven thirty, two and a half godforsaken hours after Olivia had knocked on his door, his housemate went out for lunch with her older brother and her partner, leaving Neil and Andrew where they sat on opposite ends of the couch. Neil had the TV on, watching the midday game of Exy where the Tornadoes were taking on the Giants. Kevin’s team was winning and even though it wasn’t yet halfway through the season, people were already placing bets that the Tornadoes would make it to finals again. Andrew had his feet on Neil’s lap and scrolling through his Twitter feed to see if anything had been said about the run that morning. A handful of pics had been snapped and shared around by fans, but none of them were clear enough to prove that it was Neil, Andrew and Olivia with their faces cast in shadow from the caps and not looking around as they concentrated on their pace. They’d maintained a seven-minute per mile pace the entire run, which may not have been exceptional, but was fast enough for Andrew who was much more comfortable jogging long distances. A few people were trying to ramp up the images, saying they were clearly friends and that it had to be Neil and Andrew. Some were even trying to press that they were clearly boyfriends, the truth, but it wasn’t gaining much traction surprisingly. People seemed too fixated on the rivalry to see anything else and were convinced that the people running was just a trio of friends who were fans of Exy. Andrew didn’t get involved.   
“Oh my god, the article!” Neil yelled, pushing Andrew’s feet of his lap and jumping up. Andrew felt guilty for not reminding him about it earlier, but he’d been distracted by dying. He pulled his feet up under him, readjusted his glasses and waited while Neil went and fetched the magazine and brought it back to the couch. He sat down cross-legged, back fetched up against the arm of the couch and facing Andrew directly. Immediately, Andrew was on edge, just based on his body language and the small, sadistic smile on his face. Andrew turned his screen off and put it down on the coffee table before getting comfortable.   
“So, you really didn’t know what this was for?” Neil asked, holding the magazine in a way that Andrew couldn’t see the cover.

“No. I didn’t ask, Fiona didn’t tell, and nothing was really explained at the shoot,” Andrew said. Neil’s smile grew.

“Okay, well, here goes nothing,” Neil said before clearing his throat. “’Andrew Minyard, number three on the court and number three on our list! With his broody expressions, muscles for days and a jawline to die for, we couldn’t not put the number one goalie on our list of Top Ten Bachelors of Exy!’” Neil read.

“Excuse me?” Andrew said. Neil burst out laughing and lifted the magazine so Andrew could see the front cover. It was a picture of Andrew and two men named Henry and Sampson he’d met at the shoot. They were posed together, but Andrew had refused to let them touch him so Andrew was sitting on a backwards chair, his chin on his arms where they were resting on the top of the chair and looking as bored and unimpressed as he’d been at the time. The other two men stood behind him looking more like professional models than Andrew did, especially with the three of them decked out in the supremely expensive clothes they’d been given. In huge white font, the cover said ‘Exy’s Top Ten Bachelors’ with smaller font saying, ‘Meet our top ten bachelors while we get up close and personal with our top three!’   
“I hate my life,” Andrew said, making a mental note to ask explicit questions about content he was being featured in from here on out. He held his hand out for the magazine, but Neil shook his head.

“Can I read it to you?”

“No.”

“Will you read it aloud?” Neil pressed. Andrew considered that for a moment and when he nodded, Neil passed the magazine over. Andrew tried not to visibly cringe at seeing the pictures they’d used for his half page of the double spread. Henry had a page all to himself, Andrew and Sampson were under each other on the second page, and the seven others on the list shared the next two pages with much smaller, less involved pictures and commentary. Andrew had felt absolutely ridiculous being posed for his pictures and did it as quickly as he could, and even though they looked fine printed on the glossy pages, the reminder of the day still felt awkward on his chest. There were three pictures just of him from the shoot on his half, and one smaller one in a circle which was a screenshot from his Instagram page. The circle border image had a line to one of the questions as if it was a source for it, and when he scanned the question he realised why. Second question Andrew had been asked at that interview was: _‘Who is taking all of the up close and personal shots on your Instagram page?’_ to which Andrew had replied with a simple, _‘There are no up close and personal pictures on my Instagram.’_ Apparently, his sly response had just added fuel to whatever fire they were fanning, and they’d gone and stolen one of his pictures, appropriately credited, to prove their point. It was a picture of Andrew sitting at the window with one leg pulled to his chest and a book hanging loosely from his hands, glasses on his face. Neil had taken the picture just after he’d said ‘hey, handsome’ and there was a tiny smile on Andrew’s face.

“I hate this,” he decided. Neil crawled across the couch and Andrew uncrossed his legs so he could lie between them, his back against Andrew’s chest and his head resting on his shoulder. Andrew held the magazine in front of them, feeling a little bit sick if he was honest.

“What do you hate? That the world thinks you’re available when you’re not, or that you’re being marketed to a bunch of women?” Neil asked. “Oh! What about the fact that you’re on display in some super staged pictures that make you look like you might actually be easy for a normal person to talk to?”

“D, all of the above,” Andrew muttered. Neil smirked up at him and Andrew covered his face with the magazine. “Are you saying I’m not easy to talk to?” Andrew asked. Neil pushed the magazine away and resurfaced grinning.

“Not for normal people,” he said. “I manage, so does Olivia and our old team, but none of us are normal.”

“Touché,” Andrew conceded.

“Go on, read it,” Neil said. Andrew sighed and repositioned the magazine so that he could hold it with one hand and put his other arm under Neil’s shoulder and rest his hand on his chest. Neil started playing with Andrew’s fingers almost immediately.

“’Question one, what is your dream date? Answer: I don’t have one. I’ve never been on a traditional date and I don’t plan to start now… I guess going for long drives counts, I like those.’” Andrew read. Neil smiled fondly up at him. “That was two questions, technically, on the day. My first answer wasn’t good enough for them, so they asked me what I counted as a date, traditional or otherwise,” he explained.

“Oh yeah? And our long drives around South Carolina every weekend counted as dates huh?” Neil teased. Andrew rolled his eyes and tapped his fingers in a pattern on Neil’s chest, focusing on the rhythm to help him organise his thoughts and feelings. Neil let go of his hand to let him do it and waited.

“Yeah, I think so. And all the drives since. The trip to Portland was just one long, extended date,” he said. Neil seemed to like that response, judging by his small smile and the way he looked up at him from under his lashes.

“I think the walks on the beach whenever we go to the coast count too,” Neil mused. “And every time we’ve ever stopped for milkshakes at your request.”

“I think so, too,” Andrew agreed. They may not go to romantic dinners at expensive restaurants where they’d both be uncomfortable and antsy, or the cinema where Neil would probably run away from the loud surround sound, but what they did do was perfect for them. Andrew realised he may not have considered it ‘dates’ per se, but every time that it was just the two of them was where Andrew felt the most contentment and that counted more than anything.

“The next question made me laugh aloud on the plane,” Neil said, getting Andrew’s attention again. Neil was fidgeting with Andrew’s fingers a second time around which meant Andrew must have stopped tapping, and he squeezed just enough to let Neil know he was listening. “Not because of what you said, but because it would have been fucking hilarious if you’d told the truth. ‘Who takes the intimate bedroom pics of you Andrew?’ Oh no one, just Neil Josten, the man you all think I hate.” Neil laughed and for a moment Andrew did too, imagining the drama it would have created if he’d just deadpanned ‘Neil Josten’ to the interviewer. Neil looked pleased that he’d made Andrew laugh and when the moment passed, he looked back at the magazine for Andrew to continue.

“’Question three, what are you looking for in a girl? Answer: Nothing… no I’m not [looking for a girlfriend] … It wouldn’t be the right thing for me [at this stage in my life]. Exy is more important.’” Andrew took a long, deep breath and closed his eyes against the headache forming at the front of his head. “They took so much out of context,” he said. “When I said ‘nothing’, they asked if I was looking for a girlfriend, which I clearly said ‘no’ to. Then they tried to get more out of me and asked ‘is it what you need at this stage in your life’ so they’ve added their own words to the end of my sentence, when I just meant no, having a girlfriend is not right for me.” Andrew ended his annoyed tirade when Neil squeezed his fingers gently.

“How did they get you to say that Exy is important? Asking for a friend…” Neil said with an amused smile. Andrew pulled a face at him.

“Don’t get all giddy about it, they asked me what was more important to me, girls or Exy. The answer is kind of obvious,” Andrew said. Neil snorted and closed his eyes for a minute, probably enjoying the visual of Andrew being faced with the impossible choice of ‘Exy’ or ‘girls’.

“Okay, last question,” Neil said. Andrew sighed and resumed an irritated, uncomfortable tapping against Neil’s chest.

“’When you think of love, what do you think of? Answer’.” Andrew felt a sudden, sick wave of realisation slam into his stomach when he remembered his answer to that question. At the time, the question had thrown him enough to be interesting and he’d answered it after a long moment of deliberation. It was probably the most honest and raw he would ever be in an interview, only because someone had taken him by surprise on a day where the ache of missing Neil had been a little more intense than it often was.

“Yes?” Neil prodded and Andrew looked down to see a soft, contented smile on his face. Andrew realised that Neil hadn’t wanted to be awake and present for Andrew’s reaction just because he found the entire situation funny. The ways Andrew had answered actually meant something to him. He swallowed back his anxiety at being vulnerable and pushed back the embarrassment of having said it on the record, tossed the magazine to the far end of the couch and interlaced both his hands with Neil’s. When he spoke, he spoke quietly against his cheek near his ear.

“My answer for the magazine was ‘Love is sharing the weight of your entire fucked up life with someone and be willing to take on the weight of theirs. When that doesn’t make either of you fall apart, love is about holding on to it.’”

“If that is the answer for the magazine, is there an answer just for me?” Neil asked, voice so quiet Andrew could only hear it because they were pressed so close together. Both of their hands were shaking as they held on to each other and Andrew closed his eyes, letting himself feel. Feel the waves of nausea that came with his fear of loving, the ache behind his ribs that came with missing him, and the peace he felt when Neil was with him. The way the concept of home had so definitively become attached to Neil and not a place. When he spoke, his voice was hoarse as he tried to keep those feelings in check, but his words were honest.

“Someone asked me once, what I feared, and I told him heights because it was true. What I didn’t say was that I was scared of love too because I didn’t understand it. It isn’t something that can be controlled or made sense of and it meant letting someone in when I’d spent my entire life learning to shut everyone out. It meant sharing truths for truths, learning to trust him with the only things and people I cared about, and knowing at any moment he could walk away. Love meant facing the prospect of losing him and falling apart at the seams when it happened.” He took a steadying breath and swallowed against the lump in his throat.   
“When I think of love, I think about handing over a key, I think of saying ‘stay’ and the way _you_ looked when you told me I was amazing that day in Baltimore. I think of the way you draw fox paws on literally everything, even now, and how it drove me fucking crazy when I found them on my ethics and law textbook. A hand on my leg when I drive, a spare hair tie on your wrist in case I need it, patience as I learn to understand myself again, and again, and again.  
I think of the way it felt when you kissed me at my graduation, when you held me together at my twenty-fourth birthday party, when you call me a drama queen because in those moments it’s so obvious to me how well you know me. That you know me so honestly, and you’re still here.” Andrew let the silence stretch out between them and pressed a kiss to Neil’s cheek. He could feel both of their hearts racing and Neil was rubbing his thumbs against Andrew’s palms.

“Do you want to know what I think of when I think of love?” Neil asked quietly, his own voice a little hoarse as he choked on his words. Andrew hummed in confirmation and closed his eyes, his heart in his throat. “I think of your unflinching gaze every time you learned a little more about me, the way you held me up without even realising you were doing it and the way you fought at my side before I even knew there was a fight. I think of tracing the key you gave me, from memory, into my palm as I faced the worst night of my life and the way it felt when you came crashing into the room all angry and feral the next day. The night sky above you and concrete beneath me as we kissed nearly every night for years. Your pillow in my bed. A dinosaur toy on my bedside table. You picking me up when I call, and knowing I can call you instead of running.” Andrew felt Neil smile and it cut through the thick, complex ball of emotions growing in his stomach and he felt as if he could breathe easier again. “When I think of love, I think of you. The person who stopped me from running. Who gave me a home.”

“Let’s never speak like this again,” Andrew murmured.

“Let’s not,” Neil agreed with a relieved laugh. He lifted his head and turned around for a kiss. Andrew pressed deeper into it and put both hands on either side of his face. Neil turned completely, trapped between Andrew’s legs and made a soft, short whine in the back of his throat. It wasn’t a noise Andrew heard often at all, but it was a quiet plea for more. It was extremely rare for Neil to ask for more, always content to just take whatever Andrew was willing to offer, so when he did ask even with just a quiet noise in the middle of a kiss, something inside Andrew unravelled.

“Yes,” Andrew said against his lips. Neil moved faster than he had all morning, run included, and got off the couch, dragging Andrew after him, the magazine forgotten and discarded behind them on the cushions.

Andrew let Neil push him down onto the bed and press slow, languid kisses down his neck, sending shivers down his entire body and his hands clenched convulsively on Neil’s hips. Neil wasn’t in a hurry now that they were where he wanted them to be, with Neil above him and Andrew pressed into the mattress. He let Neil unravel his defences and take him apart piece by piece with his mouth, pushing him past the edge of caring and driving him crazy with need and desire. Neil reached into the top drawer as he pressed kisses to Andrew’s hips and when he’d found what he was searching for he pulled back and sat back on his knees with Andrew laid out before him with kiss swollen lips, entire body flushed, his erection aching with need.

“Top ten bachelors my ass,” Neil murmured, digging his fingers into Andrew’s hips and scratching down his thighs so that red lines bloomed against his pale skin. It was claiming, it was Neil’s way of saying ‘mine’, and paired with the pleasure pain of the scratches, Andrew arced his back against his will.

*

Later that afternoon, once they’d showered for a second time and Neil was lying with his head on Andrew’s lap and catching up on the games he’d missed while they’d been in bed, Andrew’s phone rang. Neil grumbled as he moved so Andrew could lean forward for it, but he muted the TV for him and put his head back on his legs the moment Andrew was comfortable again. The caller ID made Andrew feel warm and safe and when he answered, he was smiling.   
“Hey Bee,” he said.

“Hello Andrew, I was just calling to see if you were okay?” Betsy said. Andrew frowned and Neil must have felt something change because he rolled onto his back to look up at Andrew with raised eyebrows.

“I’m okay, why wouldn’t I be?” He answered warily.

“I was at the supermarket just now and I saw you on the cover of a tabloid, something about being a bachelor. I know how much Neil meant to you and I…” she trailed off when Andrew started laughing, a sound which only made Neil’s eyebrows go higher.

“No Bee, it’s fine, honestly. Just a miscommunication between me and my PR manager. Apparently, she took me saying ‘I don’t have a girlfriend’ as meaning ‘I am available’,” Andrew explained. He wasn’t quite sure how to process the fact that she’d thought Andrew would be upset and suffering and immediately rung to check up on him, so he pushed that away to deal with later, probably next time he saw her.

“Oh, I am so relieved,” Betsy Dobson said, sounding genuine. Andrew took the phone away from his ear, put it on speaker and held it above Neil who scowled up at him.

“Say hi to Bee, Neil,” he said.

“Hi Betsy,” Neil said, sounding pleasant enough even though his eyes remained narrowed.

“Neil!” She said, sounding delighted. Andrew smiled smugly back at him. “I thought you would be in Portland!”

“I flew into Chicago this morning,” Neil said simply.

“Yeah, at two thirty! He made me pick him up,” Andrew said, relishing in the satisfaction of tattling on his boyfriend to a maternal-type figure. Neil had Abby, Andrew had Bee, and… well all the Foxes had Wymack.

“That sounds like a nice surprise, although awfully early. Was everything okay Neil?” Betsy asked kindly. Neil flared his nostrils at Andrew who made a rolling hand gesture for him to answer her.

“Everything was fine,” he answered shortly, but Andrew made the gesture again and he sighed through his nose. “I just missed Andrew, so I got on the first flight after my game yesterday.”

“That’s very sweet,” Betsy said, her smile clear in her voice. “I saw the tabloid and was concerned, but I see it’s all okay.” Andrew took the phone off speaker and Neil rolled back onto his side.

“It’s all fine,” he said. “But thank you for calling to check.”

“Of course Andrew, you know I care,” she said. Andrew did, but he didn’t say anything. “When will you be back in South Carolina for a visit?” Betsy asked.

“Um, next week I have a game against Neil’s team in Portland, but then I have a weekend off because of the odd number of teams so I can come down in two weeks?”

“That sounds lovely, would you like to stay in my spare room or will you stay at Abby and David’s?”

“I’ll probably stay at Abby’s and Wymack’s,” Andrew said. He didn’t mind being a hassle to them, they had put up with him coming and going from their homes for years. As comfortable as he was being close to Bee, even more so now that he was no longer a patient, he didn’t want to feel like a burden.

“Okay, I will let them know to expect you,” she agreed easily. “Only another month and a half before knockout rounds, are you excited?”

“It’s fine I guess, it’s just more games. Three and a bit months until championships,” Andrew said. Neil went tense at the mention of championships, but Andrew let him deal with that on his own.

“Well I am excited for you,” she said. “And I am glad you’re doing well Andrew. See you in two weeks, sweetheart.”

“Bye Bee,” he said calmly. She hung up the phone and Andrew put it on the arm of the chair just as Olivia got home to emotionally and mentally prepare for their game that night.

“I see you two have broken up,” she said. Andrew looked over his shoulder at her and Neil sat up with a bored look on his face. She waved a magazine at them before putting it on the kitchen countertop, smiling prettily. “Did the rivalry become too much? Maybe it was the fact he throws shoes at you, Neil? Perhaps it’s the fact that you’re both emotionally constipated?” She teased. Neil snorted and Andrew flicked a cool expression his way. Neil pulled his features into an expressionless mask and stared right back, both of them remembering their talk about love only a few hours before. His lip twitched and Neil’s eyes were bright, but Olivia made an exasperated sound. “See what I mean? Emotionally constipated.”

“I think it was the shoes,” Neil said, looking away from Andrew.

“My bet is on the rivalry,” Andrew added. Olivia grinned at them and tapped the magazine again.

“You just going to let this slide?” She asked. Andrew shrugged and turned back to the TV, tugging Neil back down to his lap.

*

Before the game that night, Andrew found Fiona in the office preparing statements for after the game. He knocked at her open door and she startled when she saw him.   
“Andrew, hello! Is everything okay?”

“I’m not a bachelor,” he said. She looked confused for a moment before her eyes cleared and her smile brightened.

“No, well I know you’re not looking for a girlfriend right now, but the piece was just about single men in the league to make women more interested and sell tabloids, you know how it goes,” she said.

“No,” Andrew said firmly. “I know what you’re saying, but when I say ‘I’m not looking for a girlfriend’ I don’t mean that I’m available. I am in a relationship and I have been since sophomore year. Over five years, Fiona. I’m not a bachelor.”

“Oh my god,” she said, her face falling. “Shit, I am so sorry. Um, shit, okay, I’ll fix this. Let me whip up a quick social media campaign, we can…” she trailed off when he lifted up his hand to stop her before her change in pace made him dizzy.

“It’s fine, I’m not about to announce my relationship to the world. My partner and I could care less about the article so don’t go reneging on it now. Just, don’t set me up for shit like that again,” he said.

“Okay,” she said, visibly relaxing. He turned to go but she called him back.

“Yes?”

“Who is it?” She asked. Andrew put a gloved finger to his lips and before she could call him back to talk about NDAs and other paperwork, he walked out of the office hallway in the direction of the Lion’s Den.


	21. "Don't Even Think About It."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ANDREW VS NEIL ON THE EXY COURT BOIS LET'S GO!!!!! 
> 
> Also, Harmony is mean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to my new friend Elliott (@Logan_B here on AO3)!! Thank you for talking about AFTG headcanons and Alex Fierro with me, and for all the laughs and smiles you've given me <3

“Get the fuck out of my car,” Neil said, pulling up to the curb of the away team entrance at the Scorpion’s Stadium. Dante made a funny noise in the backseat of the car, probably not yet used to how Andrew and Neil were around each other, but Andrew didn’t react other than to collect his things at his feet. The Lions were staying at a hotel that night, but Andrew was staying with Neil and Dante for the weekend as was planned months ago, despite Neil’s impromptu weekend stay in Chicago last weekend.

“See you soon,” Andrew said, getting out. Neil pulled away the second the door was shut because they were already close enough to being late without needing to drive around the entire stadium to the home side.

“Do you think we’re going to win tonight?” Dante asked, leaning over the centre console. Neil met his eyes in the rear vision mirror and shook his head. Dante sighed and leaned back in the seat. “Why not? Did you bribe him again or something?”

“No,” Neil said with a surprised snort. “I haven’t had to bribe him since championships last year, he seems to have decided he cares about the game at least enough to try not to lose.”

“So…?” Dante prodded. Neil parked the car and undid his seatbelt before turning to look at his friend in the back of his car and waved his hand as he tried to find the words to describe his boyfriend.

“Andrew wouldn’t have needed to decide he cares, nor would he need to have been bribed to lock the goal the fuck down against me or Kevin. He likes saying no to Kevin, and well… I’ve never been able to score against him and that’s not about to change tonight,” he said.

“Not once?” Dante asked, looking genuinely shocked. Neil made a face and nodded his head.

“Not once,” he confirmed. “He just goes into Terminator mode and locks the goal down, I can’t do shit.”

“First of all,” Dante said, holding one finger up, “that’s rough buddy. Just try score as much as you can in your first half?”

“That’s the plan,” Neil said. Neil had been playing longer stretches at the end of the first half and start of the second half and now played a total of fifty minutes of the game which was unheard of for most pro teams with over 20 players, but especially so for a first year player. Andrew played the second half in goal so Neil was going to have to pull out all the stops in his first twenty-five minutes.

“Second of all,” Dante continued, face breaking into a wide grin, “you just made a pop culture reference and I am so proud of you. Let’s go so I can tell Oscar,” he said, throwing open his door. Neil laughed and followed suit, locking the car behind them as they headed to their entrance. Oscar’s boyfriend, Jaiden, was a walking encyclopedia of pop culture references and he and Oscar were big movie buffs just like Dante. It wasn’t uncommon for the three of them to watch movies at Dante and Neil’s house and if Neil felt like it, he would sit in the lounge with them. Nicky and Matt had spent all of Neil’s college life trying to show him classic movies that people of their generation should know, but Neil never really paid enough attention to be able to reference them in conversation. Oscar, Jaiden and Dante often spoke only in references that Neil didn’t understand and the anxiety of not understanding had pushed him into paying attention. He had watched more Vine compilations than he would ever admit, re-watched classic movies and listened to Dante’s public playlists on Spotify. Apparently, it was finally rubbing off him and Oscar was going to be very proud.

Neil ran through the striker drills with Harmony, Kyle, Jordan and Lacey on their half of the court before the game, with Oscar and Liam playing defence as the starting backliners, Courtney and Steven taking turns in goals. Neil had only recently started being put on the court for starting drills instead of running laps with the rest of his team, and he preferred this much more. He kept his focus on his drills, keeping pace with Harmony as she did her best to try and make it difficult for him. It was becoming more and more obvious that Harmony was a Raven. She was aggressive and meanspirited, and really fucking good.   
“Go left!” Oscar yelled suddenly, giving Neil half a second to jump to his left as a ball came careening past at a wicked pace. The ball wouldn’t have hit him where he’d been standing, Andrew’s aim was too good for that, but he appreciated Oscar’s concern anyway.

“Fucking hell,” Neil said as the ball smacked into the back wall with a sickening sound.

“That could have been your ankle,” Harmony sneered. Neil ignored her and watched Steven slow the ball’s trajectory on the rebound.

“Give it here,” Neil said with a spin of his racquet as Oscar scooped up the ball. He caught Oscar’s pass and turned to hurl it down the court and nearly ran directly into Andrew who had somehow walked down the court in his bulky goalie armour and Neil hadn’t heard him.

“That’s mine,” Andrew said in Russian.

“Believe it or not, I could have thrown it back to you,” Neil answered in the same language. Andrew tilted his head up so Neil could see his eyes through his helmet and held his hand out for the ball.

“I have to go and get them if I hit them off our half,” Andrew said.

“Wymack should have implemented that rule,” Neil replied. “You also need to stop throwing things at me when you want my attention.”

“What else am I supposed to do?” Andrew replied easily. Neil grabbed the ball out of the net of his racquet and handed it over, shaking his head.

“Play a good game and you might get my attention,” Neil said. Andrew scoffed and turned away to walk back to his goal. Neil hadn’t realised that the audience in the stadium had gone quieter to watch the exchange and that both teams had stopped their drills until a whistle blew and the teams were called off court to line up and the stadium refilled with yelling.

“What language was that?” Oscar asked as he loped to Neil’s side as the teams filed off.

“Uh, Russian, we both took it in college as electives so we could talk to each other without being understood,” Neil answered. Oscar frowned at Neil through his helmet and Neil waited for more.

“But you speak French, right? Couldn’t he have just learnt French to talk to you?”

“No, because Kevin speaks French. Andrew and I can speak German too, but so can Aaron and Nicky, so conversations weren’t private. I’m also getting better at Spanish, but that’s because of Dante,” Neil said before trailing off. “Sorry, how did you know I speak French?”

“Why do you know so many languages?” Oscar squeaked.

“Lived in France and Quebec and Germany for a couple of years. I just like learning languages, they make sense to me, like maths. Can you answer my question now?” Neil said, sitting down on a bench.

“Dante, Jaiden and I were watching that French movie with subtitles and you spent the entire time on your phone so we assumed you would have no idea what was going on and then you joined in the conversation about the plot so like… kind of gave it away,” Oscar said. Neil couldn’t remember sitting through a French movie and only had a moment to wonder if he’d just not realised it was in French because he’d understood the dialogue before Oscar was bouncing off to his place in line.

*

At half-time, Neil had pushed the Scorpions to a two-point lead by scoring three points in his twenty-five minutes on the court. It was not enough to make him confident they were going to win when Andrew got in the goal for the next half, but Courtney was in his goal, so they had a chance if the game was played fair.   
“You guys ready?” Fierro asked the team. Neil wiped a dribble of Gatorade off his chin with one gloved hand and picked up his helmet with the other.

“I’m good,” Neil said when Fierro shot him a pointed look.

“Don’t pick a fight with Minyard,” he said firmly. Neil rolled his eyes and put his helmet on just as McKenna put a hand on his shoulder.

“Show him who’s boss,” he murmured.

“It’s a pretty fifty-fifty relationship, but I’ll do my best,” Neil replied quietly, doing up his chin guard. McKenna grinned and got in his place in line as the starting offensive dealer, behind Neil and Harmony as the strikers. Harmony was going on for the first time that night and she looked ready to draw blood. He followed her onto the court when the doors were opened for them and found his place at half-court facing Andrew’s goal.

“You ready, Josten?” Andrew asked in English as he walked past. Neil poked him in the small of his back under his armour with the butt of his racquet.

“Bring it, Minyard,” he taunted back, grinning as Andrew turned to glare at him for the poke.

“Watch it,” Andrew growled, using his stick to smack Neil’s away from him.

“You can hang around here if you want, but you know I’ll beat you to your goal the minute the buzzer sounds,” Neil told him. Andrew dismissed that with a lazy wave of his hand and turned back to walk to his goal. Neil watched him go for a moment before squaring his feet, getting his racquet in both hands and paying attention to McKenna’s serve. Neil snatched the ball straight away and took full advantage of his ten steps before passing it off the wall back to himself, taking another ten and passing it across the court to Harmony. She snagged it, pulled an impossible move around her backliner and passed it back to McKenna as he ran along a little behind them for a safe passing option. Neil got free of his backliner, snatched McKenna’s pass and took a shot at goal as far from Andrew as he could get it. Andrew batted the ball away with his stick as if it had personally wronged him and Neil spared only half a second to groan before he was chasing after his backliner for the ball.   
The game devolved after that. Neil and Harmony were pushing back against their backliners with everything they had, yelling and shouting infuriated curses at each other and their marks as they tried to get close to the goal. Every time they took a shot, Andrew stopped it. Harmony scored one goal in the first twenty minutes of the half while the Lions scored three, bringing them to an even game. Neil had a slight suspicion it was because letting the game pull even was interesting for Andrew that he let in Harmony’s one goal. He ruined every shot Neil took on goal and by the twenty-minute mark, Neil’s arms were aching in a dull memory of his first training session with Andrew when Neil had blown his arms out in the futile attempt to score.

“How you feeling, Josten?” Andrew yelled as they set up for another serve, leaning comfortably on his racquet like he had all the time in the world.

“Fuck off!” He yelled back. Andrew’s response was a short, amused laugh and he got back in position to ruin Neil’s night just a little bit more.

“Get your shit together, Josten!” Harmony snapped at him. Neil waved that away and prepared himself for McKenna’s next serve. Harmony and Neil pulled out all the stops and kept the possession the entire way up the court and when Harmony was a step away from goal she aimed and fired, but Andrew smacked it away half an inch from the goal line. Neil waited for Harmony to put on the breaks, but she didn’t even try to stop, just barrelled directly into Andrew at full speed and slammed him against the goal wall. Neil was moving before he could think about it. Andrew shoved her off him just as Neil got to them, but that didn’t stop Harmony from screaming at Andrew.   
“Fucking psychopathic monster!” She yelled. “You dumb fucking asshole!” She was so angry she slammed her racquet against Andrew’s chest to ward him back against the wall and Neil saw red. He grabbed her by the back of her jersey and hauled her backwards, sticking his foot out to trip her and he slammed the butt of his racquet against her own chest armour to keep her down, his foot coming down next to it for insurance. She opened her mouth to speak, but Neil spoke over her.

“Don’t even think about it,” he warned. Something about his voice made her rethink, but after a split second of hesitation she opened her mouth again.

“Tell the homicidal sociopath I will end his whole career,” she snarled. Neil’s grip on his racquet tightened as he tried to get a grip on his anger. Keeping her down and restrained was fine, it would stop her getting more than just a yellow card, just as much as it was stopping her from hurting Andrew, but throwing punches at his own teammate wasn’t going to help anything. He’d been a Fox long enough to learn that.

“Neil, don’t,” Andrew said, loud enough to cut through Neil’s protective rage. Neil looked at him and saw Andrew straighten up with a grimace behind the safety grate on his helmet. He was breathing in short gasps, probably trying to catch his breath after the body slam and the racquet knocked it out of him.

“She sai-”

“I heard her,” Andrew wheezed. He switched to Russian after that, wanting to keep Harmony out of their conversation. “We know she’s wrong, just let it go.”

“Are you hurt?” Neil asked.

“Shoulder and ribs, but nothing broken,” Andrew said carefully, sounding a little less breathless. “You know I could have handled it myself, asshole.”

“And you had to know I was going to get involved,” Neil shot back, jabbing his racquet a little harder against Harmony. Andrew nodded his head and after a moment of deliberation he held his racquet in the air in a sign that he needed to be subbed off. The referee that was already coming over to get a handle on the situation nodded and Coach Miles made the call to switch the first goalie back on. The referee tried to get Neil off Harmony and let her up, but Neil ignored her until the court door shut behind Andrew. The referee gave Harmony her yellow card of warning before she turned to give possession of the ball to the subbed-on goalie and Neil turned his attention on Harmony.

“Don’t fucking do that again,” he said, deep and menacing. Harmony rolled her eyes.

“Or what?” She replied. Neil got up in her space until she was looking down at him.

“Remember who I am. You were a Raven. You know who I am and what I am capable of,” he warned. “If you touch him again. I will fucking kill you.”

“I don’t get you, I thought you hated him,” she said, but she sounded reasonably put out by the threat and backed away. “But whatever, I won’t do it again,” she agreed. Neil moved to position, and the referee called for the game to commence again.

*

Neil was excused from press duty that night, leaving Oscar and Avery McKenna to discuss their close loss and explain the violent outburst in the second half. He heard them saying something about trying to protect Harmony from being carded and both explicitly avoided the fact that Neil had been reacting to protect his long-term boyfriend, which he was grateful for in retrospect but didn’t care enough about that night. Once Fierro had dismissed the team, Dante and Neil drove around to the away team parking lot and idled in a bay as they waited for Andrew. He walked out with Olivia, and Neil’s stomach clenched at Andrew’s arm in a sling, his coat thrown over his shoulders and hair dark and wet from the shower. Olivia waved in the direction of Neil’s car and Neil waved back even though she wouldn’t be able to see in the dark. She was staying in the hotel with the team that night but would spend Saturday and Sunday night on Dante and Neil’s couch before flying back with Andrew on Monday morning. Andrew accepted a one-armed hug before she walked off in the direction of the rented bus for the team and Andrew strolled towards the Prius. He climbed awkwardly into the passenger seat and when Neil didn’t say anything because he was swallowing back the bitter taste of anger, he looked over.   
“What’s your problem?”

“I’m going to fucking kill her,” Neil said. Andrew rolled his eyes and got comfortable in his seat.

“No, you won’t, it’s just a sprain,” Andrew dismissed. Neil didn’t move to put the car in gear or speak so Andrew let out a long-suffering sigh and looked at him again. “Ice every hour tonight, anti-inflammatory painkillers and a sling for a couple weeks, it’s fine.”

“You won’t be playing your next games,” Neil pointed out.

“Whatever,” Andrew said. “I’ll be back in for deathmatches ,” he reminded Neil. There were only four more games, four more weeks, until the championship elimination rounds started. Neil’s team had to win all four of their next games to qualify, but they had yet to play against the Tornadoes and Neil didn’t like the chances of going up against last year’s championship winners and Kevin. “Besides, I’ll be in South Carolina next weekend so Abby and then Aaron will want to treat it anyway.”

“Fine,” Neil relented, putting the car in gear.

“Are you alright?” Dante asked softly from behind Andrew. Neil didn’t miss the flash of alarm that crossed Andrew’s face as if he hadn’t realised Dante was there, but it was gone and replaced by his usual blank expression nearly immediately.

“I’m fine, Dante,” Andrew answered.

“It was good of you for not pummelling Harmony,” Dante added as if it was an afterthought. Neil saw Andrew smile ruefully out the corner of his eye as he drove them out of the carpark and away from the stadium.

“Not because I didn’t want to,” Andrew admitted. “If she hadn’t knocked the wind out of me with her second hit I probably would have. It was more impressive that Neil didn’t.”

“Still might,” Neil grumbled.

“May I ask what your little Russian exchange was?” Dante asked. “Because it looked like you were about to let go of Harmony and start swinging at Andrew.”

“Did it?” Neil asked with a surprised laugh. “He was talking me off the ledge and then I asked if he was hurt.”

“I also called him an asshole,” Andrew added with a self-satisfied smile. Neil snorted at the look on Andrew’s face and drove off, heading for home.


	22. "Get It Together, Man."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a short, nothing chapter, honestly, but I am kind of proud of it!   
> I think it's important for Andrew to be told he's important.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to all of you who read this instead of doing your studies/homework, or read in class, or who drop everything to read this. You guys stress me out a bit, but like I get it and I hope that this is a fun little procrastination for you!   
> Thank you all for reading, you all mean the world to me <3

Neil climbed over the back of the couch and landed directly next to Andrew in what he considered to be a smooth move, but Andrew didn’t even look over at him from where was looking down at his phone.  
“You suck,” Neil told him.

“And you nearly sat on my shoulder,” Andrew replied. He was being sulky because Neil had pulled a dirty trick to get him to wear his sling by calling Kevin, then Abby and then Aaron to bully him into it. He’d said that because he had no plans to do anything other than eat ice cream, annoy Neil and watch movies, he didn’t have to wear it, even though it hadn’t even been sprained for twenty-four hours. The three callers had other ideas and eventually Andrew gave in just so Neil would take them off loudspeaker.

“Quit sulking,” Neil told him, carefully leaning over his right shoulder to look at the phone screen.

“This is him sulking?” Dante asked, sounding incredulous from where he sat on a beanbag with a video game controller on his lap.

“Yeah,” Neil said with a small smile.

“How is he being any different from usual?” Dante asked, genuinely interested to know how Neil could read him so well when he walked around in a cloud of what appeared to be apathy.

“Yeah Neil, how can you tell the difference?” Andrew asked with a slight mocking lilt to his voice, still not looking up.

“That, for one, the petty mocking tells me I’ve annoyed you, you royal pain in my ass,” Neil said. “Secondly, he won’t look at me or make eye contact, which is a dead giveaway that he’s shitty. And number three…” Neil went quiet to see if Andrew took the bait and grinned gleefully when he did.

“I swear to god, Josten-”

“He’s using my surname in that particular tone of voice,” Neil said. “Kind of exasperated and irritated.”

“Why do you look so thrilled that you’ve pissed your boyfriend off?” Dante asked.

“This is nothing,” Neil said. “This is just sulky because I made Kevin and Aaron bitch and moan at him. You walk away when he starts smiling and laughing when he threatens you.”

“No, that’s when you run,” Andrew said. Neil held his hand up and rocked it from side to side in a so-so gesture.

“I, personally, don’t run from you, but you don’t scare me so…” Neil said, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek.

“Kissing Andrew when he’s angry sounds to me like a good way to die,” Dante mused, looking over his shoulder at them.

“Well, he didn’t move away, and he didn’t say no,” Neil said with a smile. “He knows I would have stopped if he had and he clearly didn’t want me to do that.”

“Three hundred percent,” Andrew grumbled. Neil stretched out on the couch and put his head on Andrew’s legs, but Andrew shook his head down at him, so Neil sat back up. Andrew shoved a pillow against the arm of the couch and moved to sit sideways with his legs up on the cushions and gestured at Neil with his phone to lie back down. Neil settled down on his back between his legs and rested the back of his head against Andrew’s stomach, hooking his knees over the other arm.

“He’s not so scary,” Neil promised Dante, getting comfortable.

“Three hundred and one percent,” Andrew said.

“What’s with the percentages?” Dante asked.

“It’s how much I want to flay his skin from his bones and hang his corpse up as a warning to my enemies,” Andrew said in a deadpan voice. The percentage, the neutral tone of voice and Andrew’s willingness to let Neil lie on him meant he was at least mostly over his grudge. The look on Dante’s face made Neil laugh. It was a mix of horror, confusion, and doubt as he took in their comfortable, close position.

“I’ve started to consider it a term of affection,” Neil said. “The number goes up and up, and he has not once come close to actually murdering me.”

“Yet,” Andrew said, holding his phone above Neil’s face so he could see the screen. It was an article on some cheesy sports website about the events of last night’s game with a heading Neil hadn’t expected. ‘Minyard Josten Rivalry or Schoolyard Crush?’

“That’s… not expected,” he said, taking the phone from him. Most of the commentary in the media about Neil standing up for Andrew had been more about him protecting Harmony and his team from being red carded and losing her for a game or two. Because they’d been speaking Russian quiet enough to not be picked up by mics that took the sound off the court, nobody had been able to translate their brief conversation either. This was new.

“They’re more accurate than I think they realise,” Andrew said. Neil read the piece, although brief, and handed the phone back. It was commenting on how they never seemed to stand against each other when it really mattered and that both of them had been caught more than once defending the other even if just in a small way. It talked of appearances at birthday parties, their insistence that they always watch each other’s games, being in South Carolina on the same weekends, the social media blackout they both had during the time they’d travelled to Portland from Chicago, Neil’s two toned shirt from last year’s championships, their religious denying of relationships with Robin and Olivia, and screen grabs from the interview they’d done in LA where they’d been at each other’s side the entire time.

“They’re just saying they think it’s a hoax and that we’re at the very least friends, at max mutually pining,” Neil pointed out.

“True,” Andrew conceded. “It’s the closest anyone’s been yet though.”

“Yes, our first relationship callout. Shame it’s from a publication that nobody takes seriously,” Neil said.

“You could just tell people,” Dante reminded them.

“We do tell people, we just don’t tell everyone,” Andrew pointed out.

“It’s not that we don’t want people to know, we just don’t particularly care either way,” Neil added. “Besides, it’s more fun watching the shitshow when the truth is so different.”

“Yeah, alright, I’ll give you that, it is more fun this way,” Dante agreed. “You’ve been together for five years now, right?”

“Something like that, I honestly couldn’t tell you the date we stopped being ‘nothing’ and became ‘something’,” Neil said. Andrew tried to pass his laugh off as a cough but failed. Dante looked surprised by the sound. He opened his mouth to ask something more, but there was a knock at the door and Andrew tilted his screen to Neil to show Olivia’s ‘I’m here’ message. Neil rolled to his feet and answered the door and jumped when he found Olivia wasn’t alone. As usual, Oscar and Jaiden were here for their weekly movie night, something Andrew had been sour about since he’d found out the plan earlier that day. Neil knew it was just because Andrew had been unimpressed all day and having company was not high on his priority list, but Neil and Dante hadn’t wanted to cancel on their friends. 

“We were just getting acquainted outside of uniform,” Oscar said brightly, gesturing at Olivia.

“I like your shoes,” Jaiden said. Olivia grinned and looked down at the red, vintage looking stilettoes, clicking the heels together.

“Thank you! I thought I would go for a Dorothy of Oz look today,” she said cheerily. She had on a blue chequered skirt down to her ankles and a white turtleneck, her short hair pinned back with an oversized blue hairclip. The only thing that looked out of place was her duffel and sports bag over her shoulders.

“Come in,” Neil said, stepping aside. He took Olivia’s sports bag off her and lead the way past the kitchen to the living room of the small two-bedroom, one-bathroom apartment. Andrew hadn’t moved, but he popped his head up over the back of the couch to nod in Olivia’s direction before lying back down. Jaiden went white at the sight of him and Neil saw him grip Oscar’s hand a little tighter.

“Ouch, alright, yes that’s Andrew Minyard,” Oscar said. He yelped when Jaiden’s grip tightened again. “Sorry, Jaiden was drunk when he met you that once at the championship party, this is big for him,” he said to the back of the couch. There was a drawn out pause that Neil knew was Andrew weighing his options and processing the compliment before he sat back up and looked over at them.

“I don’t know what to say to that,” he said honestly. “Nice to meet you again,” he added as an afterthought. Neil found it endearing that Andrew was trying not to be an abrasive asshole to Neil’s friends.

“Come sit, or get drinks or order pizza or whatever,” Dante yelled from where he sat. Neil put Olivia’s bag out of the way, and she set her duffel down beside it before taking off her shoes and going over to sit on the second beanbag next to Dante. He offered her a remote and she latched onto it excitedly, asking questions about the horror theme in the game he was playing. They’d met once before now, at the same party Oscar had referred too, but it was as if they’d known each other for years and Neil was relieved to see it. Oscar sat on the armchair and after a moment of awkward deliberating, Jaiden sat down on his lap. Oscar looked equal parts dismayed and amused by his boyfriend’s awkwardness. Jaiden was usually attached to Oscar’s hip as if they hadn’t seen each other in months, this display of unease and not wanting to look clingy was at Andrew’s, and perhaps Olivia’s, expense.

“Get it together man,” Neil told him. Oscar snorted inelegantly and put his arm around Jaiden’s waist. Oscar was probably about Matt’s height and Jaiden was only an inch or two taller than Neil was so Oscar could see over his head when he sat on his lap, which Neil had well and truly decided would be a gift. Neil and Andrew had to lean around each other to see or be seen when sitting like that. “Move your knees, asshole,” Neil said to Andrew now. Andrew made an annoyed noise and got back in the same position from before so Neil could lie down and use his stomach as a pillow.

“Here,” Andrew said, grabbing another decorative pillow and shoving it under Neil’s head so he could still see the occupants of the room without straining his neck. Neil got comfortable and tilted his head to watch the screen while Jaiden and Oscar had a whispered conversation in the armchair and Andrew scrolled through his phone. “When did you take this?” he asked. Neil looked up and saw Andrew’s Instagram open on his phone. The picture was him after a second much needed shower last night once they’d been home for a few hours, his hair tied up and dry, shirtless with just his arm in the sling and rubbing his sore shoulder with a pout he hadn’t realised Neil was capturing. He looked adorable in a sexy way and Neil loved the picture more than he’d expected.

“After the shower,” Neil answered.

“There are so many comments from middle aged women offering to take care of me,” Andrew said, switching his phone off and putting it on the arm of the couch behind him.

“Sounds like a you problem,” Neil said, shrugging it off.

“What’s up?” Oscar asked curiously. Jaiden looked equally intrigued.

“I posted a pic on his Instagram and soccer moms are being weird,” Neil said.

“Oh my god!” Jaiden said. “You’re the mysterious person taking all the candid pictures of Andrew!”

“Yeah,” Neil said with a laugh. “Who else would it be? He’s the one posting on my account too.”

“I probably should have worked that out well before now,” Jaiden said sheepishly.

“Maybe,” Neil teased. There was an easy silence for a moment, punctuated by the pair on the floor nudging at each other as they played, before Andrew spoke.

“Why is it a big thing, to meet me?” Andrew asked, looking at Jaiden. The brunette shrank a little at being addressed, but he looked as if he was steeling himself to answer.

“I didn’t like Exy, or even know anything about it until I met Oscar in my senior year of college. He was first year pro then, so I did some research into it and it was your senior year as a Fox. I found out everything the media could spit out about the Foxes and, well, you, and it helped me realise that people like me could actually do something with their lives. That _I_ could do something with _my_ life,” Jaiden explained.

“People like you?” Andrew pressed. Jaiden looked sheepish, but he also looked brave and that was something that Neil and Andrew could respect.

“Foster care abuse, overcoming addiction, not being straight… I even went to juvie for a year when I was in high school. Although, I didn’t know about the gay thing until Neil joined Oscar’s team, but Nicky was out and that was enough for me,” Jaiden said.

“I’d never thought of it like that before,” Andrew said quietly, more for Neil than anyone else.

“Hm?” Neil said, reaching for Andrew’s uninjured arm and pulling it around him. Neil could feel Andrew’s unease as he tapped a rhythm on his chest.

“That people would actually look up to us… to me,” Andrew said, sounding stressed out but clearly trying to hide it. Neil felt concern bubble in his stomach but decided to just let this play out. “To me, Aaron and Nicky. Even Renee and Allison, or Dan… any of us really. We went through our own personal hells and came out the other end damaged goods, but alive. I never stopped to think of what others would see, what it would mean to them.”

“I’m not the only one,” Jaiden said carefully, and Neil looked over to see a small, fond smile on his face. “You and the Foxes have inspired hundreds, thousands of people even, across the country. To play sport instead of making bad decisions, to find a family in a team. Me, personally, I will never pick up an Exy stick voluntarily, but I came out of the closet, got an internship straight out of college and now I’m working on an animated series for Netflix so…” he finished talking with a shrug. Oscar pressed a proud, affectionate kiss to his cheek. Neil squeezed Andrew’s hand gently and after a long moment, Andrew squeezed back to let him know he was okay. Neil could tell that being told he was inspiring people was not something Andrew would get used to, that he was going to be dealing with that for the rest of the night, but he was going to be okay.

“Exy is overrated anyway,” Andrew said, carefully choosing to ease his own tension and move on from the conversation. “I prefer cartoons.”

“You and me both,” Jaiden said with a relieved laugh.

“Hey losers, who wants pizza for dinner and who wants tacos?” Dante asked, not looking away from the screen as Olivia beat him in the game. “Fucking hell, Liv,” he muttered.

“You were terrible in college, you’re terrible now kiddo,” she taunted with a laugh.

“Wait, what?” Neil said, sitting up to stare at them properly.

“What, what?” Olivia said back.

“You went to college together?” Neil demanded. They both laughed and Dante paused the game.

“Yeah! Olivia was vice-captain of the team when I started, she was my captain for my sophomore and junior year before fucking off to the pros and leaving me behind,” Dante said.

“Get over it,” Olivia moaned. “I was gone for two years, it’s fine now.”

“You were friends?” Neil asked.

“I protected him, Dante was the baby of the team, even when he was a sophomore and junior, so I was the one who sat down and watched his movies with him and played his games.”

“Total big sister energy, but I appreciated it,” Dante said. Olivia smiled and ruffled his hair. “Pizza or tacos?”

“Pizza!” Was the unanimous answer.


	23. "Are We Going Home Now?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I saw a headcanon that Andrew would know people from foster care, so I present my interpretation of that to you now.  
> Also, the moment you've all been waiting for! I am giving Andreil a break from travelling :')

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I probably did have some notes for this chapter, but I am too tired to remember them now.

Andrew kept his head down as he walked through the city, his hair out around his face and a turtleneck up to his chin. He was wearing high waisted pants with a chain from his pocket to his beltloop that hung against his leg. Fiona had signed him up with a clothing brand that seemed to specialise in streetwear, and he didn’t have much of a choice other than to wear it. At least it wasn’t uncomfortable, it was black, and he hadn’t had to fight to be allowed to wear his bands.   
With the championship final coming up on Saturday, Exy paraphernalia was everywhere, specifically for the Lions who had made it for a second year in a row. They were going up against the Tornadoes again in a never before seen second consecutive championship rematch. With Neil’s season over, much to his despair, he was back in Chicago as well and the bastard had brought with him his friends from Portland, although they were in a hotel and Neil was back at Andrew and Olivia’s apartment. Andrew had gone into town because he’d needed new shoes for the stupid ‘cocktail party’ Neil and Olivia were holding at the apartment tomorrow. It had been Olivia’s idea, a way to celebrate the end of the season, celebrate making it to finals, and a handful of other reasons that Andrew hadn’t paid enough attention to. What had surprised him, Neil had been really invested in the idea. The minute he’d gotten excited, Andrew knew he’d lost any battle and backed down, as long as he didn’t have to help organise it. He didn’t have to organise it, but he did have to dress up for it apparently. He had slacks, button down shirts and blazers from his media appearances and banquets as a pro, but he’d worn his shoes through at the heel thanks to his bad habit of dragging his feet when walking if he doesn’t want to be somewhere; case in point, at banquet dinners.   
Andrew held his bag tighter in his hand, the shoes in their box banging against his leg and skirted around the outside of the city centre to the main street in the hopes of being unnoticed in his endeavour of finding a taxi. He’d already signed three autographs, listened to one sob story, and had six people take pictures of him when they didn’t think he was looking.   
The digital billboard above the city centre was going through each member of Andrew’s team, headshots with their statistics followed by a minute or two of replays of that player’s greatest hits. It was just a loop of all twenty players and Andrew had managed to not see his own yet, but just as he was cutting across the middle, it changed, and he glanced up. His own unimpressed face stared over the city centre and he scowled right back. He rolled his eyes and ducked into the nearest café in search of sugar and caffeine and ordered an obnoxious sounding frappe. He leaned his hip against the counter to wait for the drink, his bag at his feet and his hand in his pocket where he could subtly play with a clicking fidget toy Neil had got for him years ago. Fidgeting with it helped him feel a little more grounded and the noise of the café wasn’t so bothersome when having something else to focus on. It was also smaller than a pen which made it easier to carry around and play with, and a little less obvious. He kept one eye on the door out of habit, which was the only reason he didn’t miss her when she walked in. She was tall, in her early to mid-twenties, her dyed black hair long and wavy with blue undertones, and her smile was easy going. The last time Andrew had seen her, she would have been six years old, he’d been eight. The only way he could be sure it was her was the fact that her eyes were two different colours and she had a birthmark on her neck just under her jaw in the shape of a heart. She stood at the counter to order, two feet away from him, and some part of his mind started yelling. He felt twitchy being that close to her, close to a piece of his childhood, but the part of his brain that was yelling was thrilled to see her, was desperately trying to break through his apathy and say something.

“Hello Hannah,” he said before he could even try to think it through. He immediately kicked himself for calling her that. Her name was Heather, but when they’d been children, they’d made a game of never calling each other by their real names. Heather, like Andrew, hadn’t had a surname and they found comfort in calling each other names that their abandoning parents hadn’t given them. Heather turned her head slowly, realising she’d been addressed, and Andrew threw up all of his defences so it wouldn’t hurt when she didn’t recognise him. Her smile was surprised and warm, brown and green eyes lighting with recognition.

“Johnathan, is it really you?” She said, winking at him. Andrew assumed the wink was to let him know she was in on the game they’d started so long ago and decided not to think too much on it.

“It’s me,” he agreed carefully. “What are you doing here, Helen?”

“I live here now. What about you, Declan?” Her laugh was elated and breathless, and she stared at him as if she couldn’t believe her eyes. Andrew wasn’t sure he could believe his own either. How did she remember him? They’d been so young and so small, on the other side of the country when they’d known each other.

“Me too,” he said. “California to Columbia to Chicago,” he said.

“With a stop off at Juvie I believe,” she said with a knowing smile. Andrew shrugged that off with a wave of his hand.

“Technically that was still in California,” he pointed out. “Oakland Juvenile Correction Facility had a nice ring to it. Thought I’d give it a go,” he said.

“And now you’re a superstar sports player,” she said. Andrew made a face and nodded slowly, not really sure what to say to that. “Are you in a hurry?”

“What?” He asked. Heather gestured at the near empty café and Andrew followed her gaze.

“Sit with me?”

“Oh.” The invitation settled unfamiliarly in his chest and his fingers clenched unintentionally into fists as he tried to war with interest and anxiety, his apathetic defences trying to dampen it all and send him home. “Um, yeah, okay,” he agreed, realising the silence had stretched out too long between them. Heather didn’t look put out by this, she’d just waited patiently. At his confirmation, she smiled again and turned back to the counter to place her order, getting a table number. Andrew had ordered his takeaway, but the barista told him it was fine and that she would bring it over to the table so he could sit down. Without discussing it, the duo went to the booth at the back of the café so that they could see as much of the store as possible, reminding Andrew that she’d not had an easy life either.

“How have you been?” She asked gently, leaning back in her seat and studying him.

“Since I was eight?” Andrew asked. “Not the best. But it’s gotten better over the more recent years.”

“Me too,” she agreed, steepling her fingers in front of her. “One shitty, abusive family to the next until I turned eighteen and started working.”

“Didn’t go to college?” He asked.

“Nah, straight to work just to feed myself the minute I was kicked out of the system. I was homeless for nearly a year but got a full-time job by the time I was nineteen, was transferred out here at twenty and now I’m a branch manager for a designer shoe company. Not glamourous, but fuck it pays good and I have time to raise my kid and write my book.”

“Your kid?” Andrew asked, gritting his teeth. They’d been in the same foster home for two years, the foster home that had taught Andrew to hate the word ‘please’ and anxiety and anger were hot in his stomach as he considered the possibility that Heather’s child could have been forced on her by someone just as shitty. She raised her hand placatingly and shook her head, reading his anger clearly.

“Not like that, big bro,” she said softly. The endearment threw Andrew enough that his anger dissolved. She’d called him that for a while when they were kids, but Andrew had always pushed the memories away as painful whenever he’d accidentally remembered her. Heather was the first and only kid he’d accepted as family when he was little, and when they’d been separated it had hurt too much to think about, but he’d never forgotten. Now, he let the hurt sit in his chest and swallowed the thick ball of emotions it stirred in his throat.

“You have a kid?” He asked. Heather would be maybe twenty-three now, two years younger than Andrew and the seventeen years since they’d last seen each other disappeared in the blink of an eye.

“I’m a foster mom,” she said with a fond smile. “The minute I had a house, had a stable job, had a car and a life outside of just surviving, I put my name down. It took a year, but last year I was called, and a fifteen-year-old boy was put into my care. It’s fucking weird being only eight years older than the person you’re responsible for, but we make it work.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Andrew said. “My cousin would though. He’s three years older than me and my brother and he became our guardian when he was like nineteen or twenty.”

“I think I heard something about that in the news a few years ago…” she mused. “We celebrated Will’s sixteenth birthday last month and he was so excited because he’d never celebrated a birthday in a carer’s home, just as it was always forgotten at group homes.” She stopped talking because the drinks were put down in front of them and Andrew eyed her with a curious gaze that she took without comment.

“Why a foster mom? Why so young?” He asked. She seemed to have been expecting that question and leaned forward to pick up her drink and cup it between her hands as if she was cold.

“Do you ever think about what would have happened to us if we’d, like, had a real childhood?” She asked.

“Not anymore,” Andrew answered honestly. “When I was a kid yeah, but I gave up thinking about it by the time I got to juvie.”

“Yeah,” she mused, running her finger around the edge of her mug. “I never stopped thinking about it. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to play my part to make it better for the next group of kids going through what we did.”

“So, you’re a mom,” Andrew said. She smiled into her mug and nodded. She looked so pleased, so genuinely happy about it that Andrew knew she was doing it for the right reasons. Not for stimulus checks, not for slave labour, not to abuse and assault children. She was a foster mom because she wanted to give a home to a child who needed one. “Good,” he told her.

“He reminds me of you a bit, Will, I mean.,” she said. Andrew’s immediate reaction was alarm.

“I’m sorry,” he said. She laughed and put her mug down, shaking her head so that her hair fell over her shoulders in inky waterfall.

“No, it’s a good thing! I don’t know who you are now, but he reminds me of the you I knew when we were kids,” she said.

“How so?” Andrew asked, curiosity pressing against his ribs. He couldn’t really remember being any other way than he was now. He couldn’t remember not being damaged.

“He’s quiet and attentive, even when it doesn’t look like he’s paying attention, you can bet that he heard every word. He’s also really quite protective of his things, which is understandable having been in foster care his whole life. I got him a kitten for his birthday, and he is devoted to it, so protective to this little responsibility of his. He loves reading too, he inhales books like air,” she explained. One of the best things that happened to Andrew when he came of his drugs was having the attention span to read again, and hearing that he was remembered for being a reader from when he was young made him smile around the straw in his mouth.

“What books?”

“Literally anything,” she said. “He’s attached to the Percy Jackson universe though and keeps rereading it.” Her voice held no judgement, only understanding for comfort characters and comfort worlds. Andrew understood as well, he’d built a whole world inside his head when he was young based off a book series he’d been given by Cass Spear. The drugs had taken the world away from him, but he remembered how it felt to have somewhere to go, somewhere safe to dissolve into when things got too hard and too scary.

“Sounds about right,” he agreed.

“His other passion is music; he spends hours making playlists for all kinds of things. Moods, moments, days, times, characters. He loves it,” she said, grinning with pride. “I bought him a guitar when he first moved in and he’s getting so good.”

“I haven’t played an instrument in years,” Andrew said, his fingers tapping an irregular rhythm on the side of his glass.

“What did you play?”

“My last foster mom taught me piano,” he said. “There was one in the rec room in juvie and my aunt and uncle had one in their house in Columbia too. I just haven’t played since I was seventeen, since Tilda died.”

“Tilda?”

“My brother’s mom,” he answered, voice hard in a clear warning that she doesn’t ask more questions. She took the hint without fail and pushed the conversation elsewhere.

“You’re a big sport’s star now, surely you can afford a piano,” she said, circling back to before Tilda. Andrew looked down at his long-fingered hands. They were calloused from Exy, bruised from sparring, nails and nail beds worn away and torn from his anxiety, scarred from his years of picking fights and playing with knives. He remembered when they’d been small and clean, nails trimmed, unmarked by the rough edges of his life because Cass had taken care of him. He curled his fingers into fists and put them out of sight in his lap.

“Probably,” he said. “I hadn’t thought about the piano until now.” He didn’t think Olivia would appreciate him cluttering up any surface of her artsy apartment with a piano, but maybe one day, when he’d found his own place with Neil, he would get a piano. “So, you’re a writer?” He asked. She looked surprised for a moment before realising she’d mentioned writing her book.

“Yeah. I am writing a young adult novel about a brother and sister going on adventures,” she said quietly.

“You’re writing our stories,” he said into the silence. She flicked her gaze to his and nodded. Andrew’s heart felt as if it had flipped over and he swallowed against his drying throat.

“You remember?” She asked. Andrew nodded his head, rubbing his thumbs against his palms. He did remember. They’d had to share a room in the cramped house where they’d met, and both were plagued with nightmares because of their experiences before that house and because of the man who lived there with them. So, they’d told each other stories in the dark, anything to escape the horrors by filling the air with heroes and villains they could overcome. Well and truly before Andrew had turned his feelings off like a switch, back when a story of a kid who looked like him could slay his demons made him feel invincible.

“You were six,” he said. “How do you remember them after seventeen years?”

“Some kids have nightlights; I had our stories. I couldn’t forget, even if I wanted to. Now I want to write them, immortalise them, and give them to other children who need them.” She hesitated and reached her hand out across the table towards him. After a long moment, he put his hand in hers and looked away from her face. “Is that okay with you?”

“Yes,” he said. “I want to read it when you’re done,” he added. She squeezed his fingers and sat back again, so he looked her in the eye again.

“I can arrange that,” she agreed.

“Give me your phone,” he said, crooking the fingers of the hand she had let go of on the table. She didn’t ask, just unlocked her cell and handed it over. He programmed his number into it and sent himself a text message so that he had hers as well, then handed it back.

“I guess this means we aren’t losing each other this time?” She said. He had a visceral reaction to her words and his fingers twitched as he caught control of his anger. He wasn’t angry at her, he was angry that he’d been separated from her so young and that life hadn’t been kind to either of them.

“I don’t want to,” he said.

“What a strange day,” she mused. “I didn’t expect to find my big brother when I woke up this morning.” Her words were simple. They were an invitation into her life and a question to be let into his.

“Me either,” he agreed, shooting a glare down at the stupid shoes he’d gone into the city to buy. Seeing the shoes again reminded him of the party and something clicked into place inside his mind. “Look, my partner and housemate are throwing a cocktail party tomorrow night, will you come?” He invited. She looked supremely taken aback, but her smile was delighted.

“First of all, partner?” She asked with raised eyebrows, emphasis on the gender-neutral term. He waved that away with a flick of his hand, she’d work it out eventually he didn’t need to go into detail. She laughed at his not-subtle deflection. “What’s it for? The party I mean.”

“End of season, championships, you name it they want to celebrate it,” he said. “I don’t get it, but I decided to pick a different battle.”

“Who will be there?” She asked, looking at him over the rim of her mug.

“Some pro players and their partners, Renee and her wife Allison who were Foxes… my brother and his girlfriend and friend from Columbia named Roland, my housemate’s friend and brother… and I think that about covers it,” Andrew listed. “You can bring Will too,” he said.

“Can I?” She asked. “We’ll definitely come,” she said with a warm smile.

“Good,” he said, taking a deep breath.

“Are any of them your friends?” She asked. “Apart from Roland.” Andrew had to think about the question for a moment. He knew he wasn’t exactly baller in the friend’s department, he didn’t quite have Neil’s knack for being picked up like a stray animal and cared about. Alex Rossen, Olivia and Andrew’s captain, was going to be there, and obviously Andrew was friendly with Jeremy, Grace, Laila and the handful of people they’d played against in college. He even got along with Jaiden, Oscar and Dante, but apart from Aaron and Roland, no one else was going to the party just because he’d asked them to be there. He wasn’t even sure Roland counted as a friend. He was just someone who’d been around too long to be forgotten.

“More like people I have to know and who I don’t want to kill on sight,” he mused. “You and Will, Roland and my brother are the only people I’ve invited myself,” he admitted. If you could count sending Aaron and Roland a text with a date, time, theme and dress code at Neil’s recommendation an invite.

“Well, we’ll be there,” she said. “I’m looking forward to it, but is there anything I should know?”

“It’s cocktail dress, whatever the fuck that means,” he said. “I’ll text you the address and start time in a minute. The only other thing is the theme…” he cringed.

“Theme?” She pressed. He blew air out of his nose and rolled his eyes.

“See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil,” he recited. “It just means, because there’s pro athletes and ‘celebrities’ invited, don’t tell anyone about it or share pictures or stories about it outside of the people there.” He appreciated the concept. He knew it would be a relief for Kevin and others to let loose without worrying about it reaching tabloids. It was also so same sex couples, like him and Neil and Laila and Grace, would be able to interact without fear of being photographed and have those pictures used against them in the media.

“Social media blackout,” Heather said.

“Not technically, just ask permission from anyone in the pictures you want to post,” he said, reciting the rules Neil and Olivia had decided on. “I think that covers it.” He pulled his phone out and sent her a text with the details. Andrew wondered if this conversation was the most words he’d shared with someone that wasn’t Neil in a while.

“I can do that,” she promised. “And I’ll have a chat with Will tonight. But I need to go get him from school now anyway, so I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” he agreed, social energy drained out of him in a wave of exhaustion. “Tomorrow.”

“Bye, big bro,” she said with a grin, sliding out of her seat. He nodded at her and she took that as the goodbye it was and left without another word. Andrew toyed with his phone for a long moment before opening it up to the text thread he had with Jackson, his sparring partner at the gym. Before he could lose his nerve, he sent him a text.

‘Cocktail party at my house tomorrow, mostly pros and partners, friends and family. 6pm. Want to come?’

‘You’re throwing a cocktail party???’ was the immediate response.

‘Not me, it’s just at my house. Housemate and partner are hosting.’

‘Didn’t know you had a girl but yeah man I’m down. Address?’ Jackson sent back. Andrew ignored the girl comment, he knew Jackson wouldn’t have a problem when he worked out the truth. Jackson had complimented a gay couple at the gym a few months ago because he thought it was cool that they wore matching outfits. Andrew, a gay man himself, had thought the matching outfits were stupid, but he’d kept his mouth shut.  
Andrew sent him the address and then followed it up with, ‘Don’t post pics without permission from the people in the pics, or spread shit about anyone there.’

‘You got it man, high profile and all that. Will Kevin Day be there?’

‘Unfortunately,’ Andrew replied before pocketing his phone and leaving the café for home.

*

When Andrew walked in, both Olivia and Neil were sitting out on the balcony drinking coffee. Olivia was knitting like the grandmother she was deep down, and Neil had his knees to his chest as he watched the world go by below them. He looked so still. There was no trace of the hunted boy Andrew had met over six years ago, the boy who’d heard Kevin’s name and fled through a locker room in fear. He wasn’t tapping his feet, he wasn’t looking for every exit, he wasn’t tense in the shoulders because there was someone standing in a doorway behind him. He was just there, still, and comfortable. He was watching the world race by with no intention of trying to outrun it.   
“You’re staring,” Neil said without turning around. Olivia looked up in confusion and startled when she realised Andrew had come to the door.

“When did you get home?” She demanded. Andrew shook his head at her in despair.

“How are you a pro athlete?” He asked. “You’re more oblivious then he is,” he added, waving his had in Neil’s direction.

“Oh, excuse me,” she said sarcastically, “it isn’t my fault I’m not hyperaware of literally everything because I was a fugitive for half my life.”

“Lucky for some,” Andrew said while Neil shot her a dirty glare. “I invited three more people to the party tomorrow.”

“You did what?” Olivia asked, putting her knitting down. Neil forgot his glare and stood from his seat so he could face Andrew with wide eyes.

“Who?”

“Jackson, from the gym,” he said because that was an easier one to admit. “And a woman I knew in foster care and her kid…”

“How the fuck?” Olivia asked. Andrew didn’t look at her, just kept his gaze locked with Neil’s, fingers tight in fists at his sides. Neil’s surprise gave way to a careful smile and he nodded his head.

“Looking forward to meeting them,” he said. “Jackson too.”

“We aren’t going to questi…” Olivia’s nosiness was cut off by a shake of his head from Neil and he broke eye contact to look at her.

“No, we’re not. Do we need to order more food with the caterer?”

“No, it’s probably a good thing that we have more people coming. There’s a lot of fucking food on the way…” she admitted.

“Good,” Neil said, looking back at Andrew. His eyes were asking what Andrew needed and Andrew knew that Neil would give him anything he asked for. Andrew held his hand out for him to take and Neil picked up his mug, took his hand and let Andrew pull him back out of the apartment.

“We’re going for a drive,” he said.

“Cool, whose car?” 

“Mine, idiot. Yours is stupid,” Andrew said, looking at the blue car parked next to his Maserati. .

“Look, it made it from Portland to Chicago with Dante, Jaiden, Oscar, me and all of our shit. It’s not so stupid,” he said.

“That entire endeavour was stupid. At least Avery McKenna and what’s her name and Lulu decided to fly like normal people,” Andrew shot back.

“McKenna’s girlfriend is Carly,” Neil said. “Also, you’re scared of heights, you can’t judge us for driving.”

“I can, and I am,” Andrew replied, turning his car on.

They drove in silence for a while before Andrew wound down the windows and turned the radio on. Neil put his hand on Andrew’s leg and made himself comfortable, facing the wind. The station was playing throw-back 90s music that Andrew recognised even though it was from before he was born.   
“I never told you about Heather,” he said as he drove. Neil didn’t react other than to turn away from the window and look at Andrew patiently. “Before I really understood how fleeting foster care was, I arrived at a house with a four-year-old girl. I was six and we were there for two years. It was the place where I learnt to resent the word ‘please’.”

“Oh,” Neil said quietly, holding on a little tighter to Andrew’s leg.

“The girl was Heather. During the two years, we grew dependent on each other as kids do when in the same hell. I thought of her as a sister, and she was probably the first person I ever felt responsible for. We got separated when I was eight and it was the first time I realised I shouldn’t get attached to people because I will always lose them,” Andrew said, staring hard at the road as he drove. “I ran into her today at a café in the city and she remembered me, called me ‘big bro’. We agreed not to lose each other again.” Andrew didn’t need to explain how he was feeling, he couldn’t even if he wanted too because all he could say was, he felt ‘wobbly’. Neil didn’t say anything, he just held onto Andrew’s leg and let him talk, let him drive, let him process on his own. Andrew felt the knots unravel from his stomach and shoulders and the tension in his chest eased enough for him to breath. The exhaustion from interacting in a social setting was still there, but with Neil at his side and the road in front of him, Andrew was starting to recharge.

Andrew drove for an hour before pulling the car into a park’s empty parking lot as the sun started to dip towards the horizon. He turned the engine off, but left the radio on and undid his seatbelt. He’d only just pushed his seat back when Neil was climbing over the gearshift into his lap and straddling his legs. Andrew blinked up at him in mild alarm as Neil put both his hands on either side of Andrew’s face and stared down at him, the setting sun behind him turning his hair bronze.   
“I know you’ve spent your entire life expecting people to hurt you or walk away from you, but I won’t.”

“I know that,” Andrew told him, frowning up at him, putting his hands on his narrow waist.

“Good.”

“I never said you would,” Andrew pointed out, still feeling a little put out by Neil’s sudden display of forceful affection.

“I know, but just…” Neil sat a little heavier on Andrew’s legs and sighed, dropping his hands to rest on Andrew’s chest. “Your story about being eight and losing the first person you can remember caring about made me sad. I wanted to make sure you knew I wasn’t going to be one of them.”

“I know you won’t be,” Andrew insisted. He meant it too. Out of everyone in his life at that very moment, Neil was not one he expected to lose. Neil ducked his head and kissed Andrew hard, curling his fingers in the front of his shirt. It was forceful and demanding, needing to be felt and not caring that it wasn’t perfect. Their teeth clashed and Neil made a desperate noise and they kissed like they were never letting go. It wasn’t sexy, there was no desire or lust in the kiss, just the need to hold onto each other. Well, Neil’s need to hold on, Andrew just went along for the ride and kissed him back just as hard, his fingers pressed hard enough into Neil’s hips it probably hurt, not that Neil seemed to care. The only thing that drew them apart was Neil’s phone ringing in his pocket, buzzing annoyingly.

“Hey coach?” Neil said into the receiver, leaning down to press his forehead against Andrew’s shoulder while he spoke. Andrew pried his fingers off Neil’s hips and discretely lifted the hem of his long-sleeved tee up and peered down to see if he had left bruises. When he saw the beginnings of five circles rising under the skin, he felt a wave of guilt and gently put his palms over them on each side.   
“Avery said what?” Neil demanded. The tension in his spine caught Andrew’s attention and he pushed Neil back so he could watch his face with a frown. Neil just closed his eyes.   
“Well yeah, it’s true… wait, really?” Neil’s eyes flew open and he covered his mouth with his palm.   
“Just like that?”

“What’s going on?” Andrew asked, but Neil flapped his hand at him to be quiet.

“Yeah, thanks for calling me. And thanks for the opportunity to play with you last season… no I appreciate it, thank you… yeah I’ll see you at the court. Bye coach.” Neil hung up the phone and stared at the blank screen with wide eyes for a long moment. Andrew’s patience wore thin and he snapped his fingers in front of his face.

“What?” Andrew asked him when Neil looked up.

“Apparently, McKenna and coach had a chat a little while ago about trying to recruit Carlson from the Lions as a new starting striker for the Scorpions. The only way Coach Miles would sign over Carlson’s contract was if they traded players,” he paused, and Andrew had to physically force himself not to tighten his grip on Neil again. “They traded me, Andrew. I’m a Lion starting pre-season training.” Neil’s face broke out into a grin and he kissed Andrew again, laughing breathlessly against his lips. Andrew felt lighter than he’d felt in two years. Neil slid his hands into Andrew’s hair and Andrew linked his fingers behind Neil’s back and they kissed well and truly until the sun went down. Neil’s knees would have been hurting, Andrew’s lower back was starting to ache, but they didn’t let go until time didn’t matter anymore. A new song came on the radio and they recognised it at the same time, breaking apart to stare down at the stereo. Runaway Train by Soul Asylum was playing quietly over the speakers. Their ringtones. Andrew remembered sitting on the bench across from Neil, the fractured look in his eyes and Andrew’s heart beating rapidly in his chest. Andrew had known by then that he would die in love with Neil Josten, and in his own twisted way, as much as the song had been a cruel joke, it had hurt Andrew just as much with the painful honesty of it. It spoke clearer than Andrew could have.

_“Call you up in the middle of the night  
Like a firefly without a light  
You were there like a slow torch burning  
I was a key that could use a little turning  
So tired that I couldn't even sleep  
So many secrets I couldn't keep  
Promised myself I wouldn't weep  
One more promise I couldn't keep  
It seems no one can help me now  
I'm in too deep  
There's no way out  
This time I have really led myself astray…”_

“Our song,” Neil whispered. “The ringtones from our phones.”

“Yeah,” Andrew agreed.

“It’s fate,” Neil said, looking down at Andrew who scoffed.

“I asked you once if you believed in fate and you said no,” Andrew reminded him.

“I also said ‘I don’t swing’ but here we are,” Neil replied easily, gesturing between the two of them. Andrew rolled his eyes but pulled Neil down for another quick kiss.

“Alright, get off me,” he said, pushing Neil away. Neil responded by pushing open Andrew’s door, climbing out with a stiff groan, and then tumbling to the ground as his knees gave out. Andrew laughed, leaning out of the car to look down at where he lay. “That’s not what I meant but suit yourself.”

“You’d think I’d have learnt my lesson after sophomore year,” Neil said, getting back to his feet a little more carefully.

“Learnt what lesson?” Andrew asked.

“That making out in the car is only fun in theory,” he said, stretching out his legs and back.

“Just making out?” Andrew asked. Neil narrowed his eyes at Andrew and grabbed his ankle behind him in a stretch.

“Do you think the boys would have sat in the backseat for three more years if they’d known what we did in it?” He asked, sounding genuinely curious. Andrew snorted, enjoying the memory of after-night-practice activities the two of them had done in the back of the car, choosing the privacy of there over the roof.

“Absolutely not,” Andrew said. “Aaron would have thrown up.”

“Nicky probably would have congratulated both of us,” Neil added. “What about Kevin?”

“Sanitised,” Andrew deadpanned. Neil laughed and nodded in agreement, finishing his stretches.

“Are we going home now?” Neil asked. Andrew pulled his seat forward again so he could reach the pedals and tapped his steering wheel as he considered the options.

“Nah, I say we go buy dinner and come back here to eat it. Then we go home.”

“Picnic?” Neil asked, eyebrow raised. “I didn’t know you did traditional dates.”

“Get in the car,” Andrew said. If Andrew had a picnic blanket in the trunk, they didn’t have to talk about it.

*

That night, once they were home in bed and both of them were too wired up from the afternoon’s events, Neil rolled onto his stomach and put his chin on his palm while he looked at Andrew.   
“You’re staring,” Andrew murmured, putting his hand on Neil’s scarred cheek, and leaning forward to press a kiss to his forehead. Neil closed his eyes and appeared to melt into the mattress for a moment before pulling himself back together.

“I’m going to tell Dante tomorrow that I’m moving out,” he said. “Will you drive with me back to Portland next week and help me bring everything back?”

“Yeah, baby,” Andrew agreed, rubbing his thumb over his high cheekbones. It was a long drive, they’d done it a year ago to move him to Portland, but they’d taken their time to get there. Andrew had driven back alone, feeling hollow and tired the entire way and trying to get home as fast as he could. The fact that he was going to drive there with Neil and then be able to bring him back home with him filled Andrew with warmth. He hooked his hands under Neil’s shoulders and pulled him effortlessly up the bed onto his chest. Neil squeaked in surprise and then buried laughter against Andrew’s neck.

“Can I move in here with you and Olivia?” Neil asked after a while. Andrew ran his fingers up his spine and chewed on his lip as he thought about it. Yeah, technically he could, Olivia wouldn’t mind, they’d already talked about the potential of that happening one day, but only that afternoon Andrew had been thinking about the ‘one day’ of living with Neil in their own apartment. An apartment with a piano and Neil’s godforsaken and beloved Exy sweaters and jerseys on half the furniture, fairy lights on the bedframe because Neil liked the ones he had in South Carolina, a big bookshelf filled with everything Andrew had read and would read one day. Beanbags and comfortable couches, barstools that Andrew’s legs didn’t swing from, and potentially a cat or two. Two toothbrushes on the bathroom sink and their keys hanging by the door.

“You can, while we find a place of our own,” Andrew said into his hair. Neil lifted his head and smiled broadly.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Andrew confirmed.

“Next season, we’re both Lions. The year after, we’re both Court,” Neil said with a grin. Andrew pushed his face away and Neil rolled with a laugh.

“How about we find an apartment without killing each other first,” he said. Neil rolled back and propped his chin on Andrew’s chest with a curious gaze.

“What would we kill each other for?”

“We might not agree on a place,” Andrew pointed out. Neil’s curiosity gave way to that throbbing-heart cartoon look that always made Andrew want to run away and kiss him senseless.

“I don’t care what it looks like, I just want to move in with you,” he said. “It’s all I’ve wanted since you left two years ago.”

“I hate you,” Andrew muttered, his heart aching as it tried to stay together under the pressure of how much he loved this pain in the ass. “Stop saying shit like that.”

“I will, for tonight,” Neil said slyly, putting his head down and cuddling against him. Andrew held him close and let the day’s emotions wash over him and away, counting down from fifty. He made it to thirty before he fell asleep.


	24. "I Would Stick With the Dating Apps."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> COCKTAIL PARTY AS PROMISED!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of the comments on my last chapter were amazing asf, thank you all so much. I am glad you all love Heather and Will so much, I adore them and I adore what they represent to Andrew.  
> I do feel kind of bad that I give you loveable characters that only exist in the space of a basic AO3 fic :')
> 
> ALSO THANK YOU ALL FOR OVER 500 KUDOS THAT IS F**KING INCREDIBLE I HAVE NO WORDS!!!!!!!!

Andrew hadn’t realised he knew twenty-seven people outside of himself until he saw the guest list of people expected to be in his house that night. Jean, Jeremy, Laila Dermott, Grace Alvarez, Renee, Allison, Kevin, Thea Muldani, Roland, Aaron, Katelyn, Olivia, Neil, Oscar, Jaiden, Avery McKenna and his girlfriend Carly, Dante, Lulu, two of Kevin’s teammates, Olivia’s older brother Simon, Olivia’s friend Jasmyne, their captain Alex Rossen, Jackson, Heather and Will. Andrew made twenty-eight people expected to be inside the, admittedly large, apartment.  
“I do not like this,” Andrew said firmly. Neil took the list away from him before Andrew could scrunch it up and he put it back on the fridge. The caterers had just left, so there was a scary amount of food spread out on the dining room table on disposable silver trays, and more alcohol than Andrew had seen in a long time was on the kitchen counter for people to make their own drinks. Mixers and cold drinks were stocked in the fridge that had a ‘Help yourself’ sign taped to it, and a varying selection of cups and glasses were stacked in the corner of the counter.

“You did agree to this,” Neil reminded him. “And your room is the furthest away from the party so you can always retreat there if it gets too much.”

“I didn’t know we knew twenty-eight people,” Andrew said.

“Neither did I,” Neil admitted, having the good grace to look sheepish. “I’m looking forward to it Drew, I really don’t want to have to cancel.” The look on his face told Andrew that if he did turn around right that moment and told Neil to cancel the event then he would, and that gave Andrew pause.

“Why would you?”

“Because this is your home, you have every reason to feel safe and comfortable?” Neil replied as if that had been obvious. Andrew let that weigh on him for a moment before taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.

“No, don’t cancel,” he muttered. “Just pour me a drink.”

“What do you want?” Neil asked, looking at the array of alcohol in front of him with fascination. Both men were dressed in their cocktail attire, Neil’s navy blue and white while Andrew was dressed head to toe in black. Neil looked damn near edible, with a tiny bit of eyeliner thanks to Olivia and the navy-blue offsetting his bronzy curls and making his bright blue eyes stand out more. He had forgone tie and blazer, choosing instead to wear a simple vest over his button down, his sleeves rolled up showing off his tanned forearms marred and striped with his scars. He had decided he could go without his bands because he would be surrounded by friends who wouldn’t pass judgement, and for those who didn’t know already, if they were there then he would be comfortable enough to tell. Andrew had his bands on as always, but his scars had different stories and he wasn’t going to share those. You couldn’t see them anyway; they were under a black button-down shirt and a simple black suit jacket. He didn’t have a tie on either and he wore black skinny jeans instead of slacks because he’d told Neil he would rather die than wear an entire suit in his own house. They could hear Olivia singing offkey in her bathroom as she finished her makeup, but they’d seen her earlier in her floor-length backless red dress and her hair had been braided across the top of her head like a tiara. She’d looked regal, and beautiful, and they’d both complimented her before she’d disappeared to fix her lipstick. It was ten past six, the party would be starting soon, they were all dressed and ready, and Andrew wanted to lock their front door.

“Anything. Just give me alcohol,” he said. Neil shrugged and grabbed a shot glass and filled it with whiskey, a good choice in Andrew’s opinion because it was his preferred drink, and slid it over to him. Andrew knocked it back like a mouthful of water, relishing in the burn without so much as a wince.

“You terrify me,” Neil said, pouring him another.

“I didn’t think I scared you,” Andrew said before knocking back the second shot. Neil waved a hand to ward the smart response off.

“No one should be able to drink a shot of whiskey without flinching. I never told you, but it’s fucked up, and I’ve always thought so,” he said. Andrew put the glass back down in front of him and when Neil didn’t pour him a third shot, Andrew took the bottle off him and did it himself.

“And I don’t care,” Andrew said, taking the third shot. He pushed the glass away after that, willing to let that hit his system before drinking anymore, and for good measure Neil put it in the sink.

“No bickering. Try and act like you like each other for a night,” Olivia said with a fond smile, appearing in the kitchen in her red attire.

“We do like each other,” Neil said.

“Speak for yourself,” Andrew shot back. Olivia opened her mouth as if to intervene, but there was a knock at the door, and she shot a panicked look at the dormant speakers in the living room. “Go get the door,” he told her, crossing the room to the laptop plugged into the speaker near the entertainment unit. He searched for a party themed playlist on Spotify and pressed play, unsurprised and mildly unimpressed that the first song to come on was Bohemian Rhapsody. He didn’t have anything against Freddie Mercury, it was just predictable. There was a raucous in the entry hall as Olivia let in the first of the guests, and the noise grew closer until Neil’s team- former team- members came into the open plan living space. McKenna and Carly came first, followed by Lulu and Dante, with Oscar and Jaiden bringing up the rear. Nine people already and that was more than Andrew had ever seen inside the apartment at one time. He considered going back for the fourth shot, but he met Neil’s gaze over Dante’s shoulder and Neil shook his head subtly. _Fine_. He promised himself no more drinks for half an hour.

Renee, Allison, Kevin and Thea arrived together next, followed shortly after by Roland, Aaron and Katelyn and they melded together almost immediately with Neil’s group of Scorpions. Roland greeted Andrew with a one-armed hug that he asked consent for and Neil hid his amused smile behind a glass of soda water when he’d asked. Andrew was not unhappy with the fact that his hook-ups (past and present if you included Neil) had learnt how important explicit consent was because of him, and he hoped Roland used it with others too.  
Grace and Laila arrived with Jean and Jeremy, followed by Olivia’s best friend Jasmyne and by that point, Andrew allowed himself another drink. He walked over to the counter doubling as a bar where Dante was showing Jaiden how to make a bluish-purplish drink.  
“Andrew!” Jaiden said with a shy smile. “Do you want one?”

“Is it alcoholic?”

“Absolutely,” Dante promised, sliding a tall glass over to him. Andrew picked it up and took a sip, unsurprised by how sweet it was. It wasn’t offensive and he could taste the vodka, so he held the glass up in a thank you.

“Luke! James!” Kevin yelled. Andrew turned in time to see his tall friend greet two of his teammates and they rallied back at him with gusto. Andrew didn’t know Luke or James very well, but he’d listened to Kevin talk about them with enough fondness to trust that they had his best interests at heart. Behind the two tall dealers was a third tall man with Olivia’s wide eyes and pointy nose that Andrew took to be her older brother Simon. Judging by the hug Laila gave him, he was right. The only people left to arrive were Heather and Will, Jackson, and his captain. Andrew waved his glass at Dante and Jaiden again and drifted off to stand in the hall so he could hear next time someone knocked on the door. Neil, who had let Simon in, was on his way back to the party and paused in front of Andrew with a bright smile.

“You’re having fun,” Andrew noted. It wasn’t even seven pm yet, so there was still time for this to dissolve into chaos or for Neil to just decide he didn’t want to be a host anymore, but for now he looked thrilled.

“Yeah, I am. I never thought I’d get to do something like this,” he said.

“Checking things off your ‘I thought I’d be dead before I could do this’ list,” Andrew said. Neil laughed and nodded his head. “What are you drinking?” Andrew asked, looking pointedly at his glass. Neil had a champagne flute full of clear sparkling liquid with strawberries in it and he was hoping Neil wasn’t about to confirm his suspicions that it was just soda water.

“Soda water,” Neil said. Andrew rolled his eyes up and looked at the ceiling.

“Why is there fruit in it?”

“I don’t know, Allison put them in there,” he replied. “Doesn’t taste much different, I think she just wanted it to look cooler.” A knock on the door stopped Andrew from answering and Neil turned to open it.

“I got it,” Andrew said. Neil looked surprised, but nodded his head, kissed his cheek on his way past and went back out into the living space. Andrew pulled the door open and was unsurprised to find a nervous looking Heather and terrified looking teenaged boy. Heather had on a mid-thigh length velvet green dress with her hair neatly curled and pinned in a complicated style. The boy who must have been Will was wearing black jeans like Andrew, a white shirt and a blue tie that hung loose.

“Oh, Liam,” Heather said, sounding relieved. Will’s face creased with confusion, which only deepened when Andrew called her ‘Jade’ in reply.

“I’m Andrew,” he explained to the kid. “Laura and I are just too stubborn to end a game we started when we were six.”

“I believe it,” Will said cautiously, shooting his foster mom a knowing look. She smiled back at him and put her hand on his shoulder, and the fact that he didn’t flinch away was a good sign.

“This is Will, he’s not a huge Exy fan so I hope no one’s offended if he doesn’t know who they are,” Heather said, following Andrew into the hall so he could shut the door behind them.

“It would do them good, knock them off their high horses,” Andrew replied. “I’m not a huge fan of Exy either. I’m just good at it,” he added. Will’s smile was small and fleeting, but Andrew was glad to see it.

“Is there anyone Will’s age here tonight?” Heather asked as they went down the hall towards the noise. Renee, Allison and Neil were in the kitchen now and when the group passed, Neil’s eyes lit up and he excused himself from the girls.

“No, but,” Andrew turned to Will, “Summer tells me you like music and we don’t have anyone in charge of that tonight.” He gestured at the laptop and the speaker and Will’s eyes widened with excitement. “It’s logged into Spotify, but you can do whatever you want as long as there’s music, okay?”

“Really?” Will asked, rising on to his tiptoes as if the job had literally lifted him off his feet.

“Really, I don’t care,” Andrew said honestly. Will went to rush over to it before pausing and eyeing Andrew with a curious look. Andrew felt Neil’s presence at his shoulder but didn’t react immediately.

“How do you two never run out of names to call each other?” Will asked.

“When she was five, she called me ‘banana bread’ for an entire day because she couldn’t think of a new name but refused to call me Andrew. We make do,” he answered. Neil snorted at his side and Andrew felt his hand against the small of his back.

“Banana bread?” He asked.

“Neil, this is my sister Morgan and her kid Will,” Andrew said, catching Heather’s surprised smile. “This is Neil Josten.”

“Nice to meet you Heather, Will,” Neil said politely.

“Hi,” Will said before gesturing over at the laptop. “I’m gonna…”

“Yes, go, Andrew mentioned he was tasking you with DJ,” Neil said. Will grinned and walked over, purpose in his step. He sat down at the chair Andrew had left near the laptop and Andrew turned back to face the people in his company.

“Nice to meet you Neil,” Heather said. She sent a wary look Andrew’s way, but he had no idea why. Neil seemed to catch on before he did.

“You look concerned,” he said. “Is it because the media has painted us as enemies?”

“Oh,” Andrew said. “Right, of course.” The realisation made him smile a little in amusement and Neil moved his hand from the small of Andrew’s back to rest around him on his hip and he made a face at Heather.

“The media has no idea what it’s talking about,” he commented. Heather frowned in confusion, but realisation dawned on her face when she saw Neil’s hand on Andrew’s hip.

“Oh wow, that makes a lot more sense,” she agreed, grinning at Andrew. He opened his mouth to say ‘I still hate him though’, but Neil let go of him and waved his hand in front of Andrew’s face to quiet him, rolling his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah, you still hate me,” he said. Andrew failed to stop his smile at being caught out.

“Every inch of you,” he agreed.

“Healthy relationship I see,” Heather commented, but there was no judgement in her voice.

“Who, Andrew and Neil?” Olivia interrupted, joining the congregation in front of the makeshift bar. “They may look dysfunctional, but it works scarily well, and I hate them for it,” she teased.

“Just because you and your partner don’t have this level of candour doesn’t mean you can hate us for it,” Neil pointed out. “Excuse me,” he added and slipped away. Andrew realised he was going for the door, which meant he could potentially be letting in Jackson, which could possibly lead to an awkward situation and Andrew found he really didn’t want this to go wrong. He wanted Jackson to be a part of this, and for once he didn’t want something to start off on the wrong foot.

“Lola this is Olivia, Livia this is Lily,” Andrew introduced, leaving them to work that out. He walked after Neil, but he wasn’t fast enough with his refusal to run like an idiot through the apartment. When he reached the door, Neil was already closing it behind a bewildered looking Jackson.

“Are you sure this is Andrew Minyard’s place?” Jackson asked. Neil turned to face the newcomer with a frown.

“Yes, I’m sure,” he confirmed, catching sight of Andrew. “See,” he said, nodding at him. Jackson turned and visibly relaxed.

“Oh good. I hadn’t expected, uh, Neil Josten to answer the door,” Jackson said. Neil shot Andrew a look he couldn’t decipher, but it didn’t look mad which was probably a good thing.

“You haven’t told him,” Neil observed.

“Have you tried this?” Andrew asked, changing the subject by pushing his blue drink into his spare hand. Neil, decidedly not being obtuse for the night, picked up on the not-subtle attempt at changing the subject.

“No,” Neil said. He put the drink to his lips and took a hesitant sip. “For something that looks potentially radioactive, doesn’t taste so bad,” he commented.

“Good, you can keep it. Jacks, do you want whiskey?” He asked, turning to his friend. Jackson looked between the two like he was watching a tennis match, but at the sound of whiskey he stopped on Andrew.

“Yes, I do,” he agreed. Neil pulled a face at Andrew again and preceded them down the hall where he was swallowed up by a group consisting of Kevin, Thea, and Roland and they guided him out to the balcony where some of the partygoers had spilled. Andrew led Jackson to the pretend bar and poured him a double of whiskey on ice and handed it over. Having regained some control of the situation, Andrew felt better, and he relaxed, choosing to ignore the awkward hallway encounter. Neil would understand that Andrew’s actions had been a bid to regain some semblance of control as two separate parts of his world came together, but he looked over at him outside anyway, just to make sure it was okay. Neil seemed to feel his gaze because he looked back over at him and smiled, lifting the blue drink in acknowledgment.  
“This is good shit,” Jackson said, peering at the bottle Andrew had poured from. Andrew pushed it closer for him to look at.

“It’s my personal preference,” Andrew said. Jackson straightened up, running his fingers through his dark brown hair, giving Andrew a strange look.

“I didn’t expect Neil Josten, your sworn rival, to be here tonight,” he said. Andrew snorted and drank a mouthful of whiskey.

“I never swore he was my rival,” he said. “I did say it was pro players and partners, right?”

“You did,” he conceded.

“Neil is both a pro player and a partner,” Andrew said.

“Speaking of partners, which one is your girl?” Jackson said, looking out at the party as if a girl would have Andrew’s name on her or something. Andrew, in response, caught Neil’s gaze again and crooked a beckoning finger at him. Neil rolled his eyes, but he excused himself and came back inside towards them.  
“Andrew?” Jackson pressed, elbowing him good naturedly. “Who is she?”

“Who is who?” Neil asked, now within earshot. “Also, you good now drama queen?” Neil added, coming to stand next to Andrew.

“Fine,” Andrew confirmed. “Jackson is trying to guess who my girlfriend is.” Neil’s laugh was equal parts amusement and bewilderment.

“He told me his partner was hosting tonight,” Jackson explained.

“Yeah, I am,” Neil confirmed. Jackson frowned, then froze, then burst out laughing. Andrew and Neil waited it out, sipping their drinks and watching, shoulder to shoulder.

“I did not see that coming,” Jackson said, regaining his breath. “You have the entire country fooled.”

“That’s their fault, we didn’t plan it,” Neil said.

“That’s amazing,” Jackson said. “I totally did not peg you as gay, but the piercings make more sense now. I just thought you hadn’t grown out of your emo phase,” he told Andrew who touched his hand to his ear. He had three helix piercings in one ear, a tragus and front helix in the other. They were all small stud earrings, nothing too thrilling, but the one lobe piercing he had he changed regularly and tonight it was a dangling silver sword Renee had bought him for Christmas last year.

“He hasn’t grown out of his emo phase,” Neil said.

“Alright, you can go now,” Andrew told him blandly. Neil smirked at him.

“No, I want to talk to your friend.”

“This one is mine,” Andrew said before gesturing around the room to encompass everyone else, “these are all yours.” He looked at Jackson then who had an interested look on his face as he watched the exchange. “He collects friends like Pokémon,” he explained.

“I shall not be a Pokemon,” Jackson said, “but we can catch up later,” he promised Neil.

“Fine, I was in the middle of a conversation with Thea about ways to get around backliners anyway,” he said. “Thanks for the drink,” he added in Andrew’s direction and went back outside.

“I’m happy for you, bro,” Jackson said as they watched Neil go. Andrew flicked his gaze to him, and Jackson smiled genuinely back. “I mean it. I hadn’t expected it, but like, it’s clear you two understand each other.”

“Is it?” Andrew asked. He knew that they did understand each other, he just hadn’t known it was obvious to others.

“Hell yeah,” Jackson said. “If I’d not told you about a girl I was dating and she’d found out, she would have flipped out. That change of convo with the drink would have not flown, but Neil clearly knew what was up even if I still don’t really get it. That shit’s dope, he gets you.”

“He does,” Andrew agreed.

“How long have you been together?”

“We don’t really have an answer to that,” Andrew admitted. “Spring break my sophomore year seems to be the general consensus. I was twenty, I’m twenty-five now… so over five years. Five and a half?” Andrew guessed. He did have an eidetic memory, but that failed you when you didn’t have a specific date attached to anything. Their first kiss had been January 20th, but they’d not let it become a ‘real’ thing until March. It was already June, five years later, so five and a half felt the most accurate. “Yeah, something like that.”

“Five fucking years?” Jackson hissed. “Bro you’re like married.”

“We don’t even live together,” Andrew deadpanned. He didn’t say ‘yet’.

*

A couple of hours later, about ten, as the party grew a little louder and a little more alcohol-induced fun, Andrew sought solace in his bedroom. He would go back out, but he needed a moment to recuperate from all the people in his space, and he tried not to miss the drugs that had controlled his life for so long when he was younger. He sat on the end of the bed with a glass of water in one hand and one of the stupid fidget toys Neil subtly left around for Andrew to find in the other. He’d only been gone for about five minutes when there was a knock at the door. Familiar, but kind of surprising.  
“What?” Andrew called out. His brother pushed the door open and came in, closing the door behind him and leaning against it with one arm crossed in front of his chest and a surprisingly pink cocktail in his hand. “I didn’t say come in.”

“Too bad,” Aaron said. He looked down, following Andrew’s gaze to the hot pink drink and shrugged. “Neil handed it to me as I passed him. I think it’s for you.” He held it out in offering, but Andrew didn’t acknowledge it, he didn’t want a drink right now because his head was already buzzed with alcohol. Aaron could drink it for all he cared.

“Did he send you after me?” He asked. It would be something Neil would do, send someone to check on him if he couldn’t do it himself. Aaron looked mildly offended and came further into the room, hesitated, and then sat down beside him.

“No, he didn’t. I have a mind of my own,” Aaron said. “There’s no alcohol in this by the way, that’s why I think it’s for you,” he added, holding the drink up again.

“That and Neil wouldn’t make you a drink unprompted,” Andrew said. He gave Aaron the glass of water and took the juice mocktail from him.

“No, he wouldn’t.”

“How is my problem doing?” He asked, looking to the door. Neil had been chatting with McKenna and Olivia at the drinks table when Andrew had slipped away, grinning up at them like he wanted to be nowhere else.

“Fine I guess,” Aaron replied. “He was letting Kevin redo his eyeliner when I left.”

“Sounds about right,” Andrew mused. In senior year, Kevin had gotten drunk and renounced gender stereotypes and gender roles. Nicky had been the only one to really react, he got excited and started rambling about gender identity terms. Neil had just saluted Kevin with his drink, Aaron had rolled his eyes but listened curiously to Nicky’s explanations, and Andrew wasn’t surprised. Kevin’s gender and sexuality were of no interest to Andrew, he’d known he was bisexual seeing as though Andrew had rejected Kevin’s advances freshman year and he’d spent enough time attached at Kevin’s hip to not see the gender fluidity of the self-proclaimed ‘queen’ of exy. Kevin still identified as a man, but he was getting more and more comfortable with his interests in things inherently female, such as makeup. Neil hadn’t renounced gender roles in quite the same way, but he didn’t mind letting people practice on him or share their interests with him. It wasn’t like Andrew could talk anyway, he still had more than one pair of clothes in his wardrobe that belonged to Olivia and he currently had black nails.

“You alright?” Aaron asked, albeit a little awkwardly and knocked their shoulders together.

“Fine, I just don’t like people,” Andrew said. Aaron’s laugh was genuine and surprised, and Andrew flicked him an impassive look.

“Neither do I, but the party is actually pretty cool,” he said.

“Tell Neil,” was Andrew’s simple reply.

“No, his ego can go without,” Aaron replied. They lapsed into silence for a moment and Andrew sipped on the pretend cocktail, making a mental note to pour vodka in it when he went back out. “So, who’s Heather and Will?” Aaron asked. Andrew hadn’t introduced the two of them, and he’d not expected Aaron to introduce himself as he would have gravitated to the people he knew, but he wasn’t overly surprised that his brother had figured out she was of some importance to Andrew.

“Heather was the one and only person from foster care I ever cared about,” he said. “Will is her own foster kid.”

“Is she going to stick around?” Aaron asked. Andrew couldn’t decipher his expression or the tone of his voice, but he nodded anyway.

“I hope so,” he said. Aaron nodded back and Andrew was a little surprised to see his smile.

“Good,” he said. “Jackson seems pretty cool too. He was talking about cheerleading with Katelyn earlier, apparently he’d been on his high school squad.”

“I did not know that,” Andrew admitted, eyebrows raising of their own accord.

“He said you didn’t, but he doesn’t seem offended that you don’t ask him questions about his life.”

“I remembered his birthday,” Andrew said quietly. Aaron nudged him again and Andrew looked over.

“It’s the day after ours, dipshit,” he reminded him. Andrew smiled back at him, small and fleeting, but real. Aaron got to his feet and turned back to face him halfway to the door. “You ready to come back out?”

“I came in here to be alone,” Andrew said, gesturing between them. “This was not alone.”

“See you back out there then,” he said. Andrew watched Aaron go and stayed on his bed for another ten minutes before steeling himself and going back out to the party.

*

Andrew stood with his back to the balcony railing, listening to Jackson, Heather, Aaron, Kevin and Olivia talk small talk. Will had come to join Heather, apparently, he’d queued up some songs and had warmed up to the partygoers enough to join the group of adults. Andrew hadn’t joined in with the conversation, neither had Will, but it was interesting enough to just stand and watch the interactions. With the time ticking closer to one in the morning, most of the partygoers were drunk, or at least nearly drunk, except for Renee, Heather and apparently Oscar and Jaiden. Heather had mentioned in passing that Will got anxious if his primary caregiver was drinking after years of foster care and she hadn’t touched a drink since. Jaiden wasn’t drinking because he was worried about making a fool of himself like he claimed he had at the last championship party, but Andrew couldn’t pinpoint a moment. Oscar had stopped drinking over the past few months after being put on a new antidepressant medication, which made the pair of them Dante’s designated handler for the night and so far, they were doing alright. They’d herded him to the other corner of the balcony for air, encouraging him to drink water and listening as he rambled about his horror games. Andrew could see past his own accumulation of people into the living room where Neil was dancing with Allison and Grace, Laila and Renee stood shoulder to shoulder talking with one eye on their wives. Jeremy had his arm around Jean as they stood talking to Kevin’s teammates, Thea Muldani, and the captains of the Scorpions and the Lions. Katelyn and Carly were mixing drinks and laughing, they’d been semi-attached since being introduced in that girl way Andrew didn’t understand. Olivia’s brother and best friend had bailed out an hour ago for work or something, Andrew had missed that goodbye conversation and was making an educated guess based on Simon’s profession as a stripper and Jasmyne’s job in a café requiring early mornings.  
“What are you staring at?” Will asked, snagging Andrew’s attention back to the conversation in front of him. Heather put her hand on Will’s shoulder as if to ward him off asking Andrew questions and Kevin and Jackson didn’t even pause their side conversation, assuming the kid would go unnoticed or be ignored by Andrew. The casual dismissal of Will rubbed Andrew the wrong way and he looked directly at him as Will looked embarrassedly down at his feet.

“I was staring at nothing,” Andrew told him. “Well, my eyes were on Neil, but I wasn’t paying any attention to anything. Just thinking.” Will looked up, eyes wide and a small smile on his face at being acknowledged.

“Who are you and what have you done with my brother?” Aaron asked, frowning at him.

“You were his age once, did you like being ignored and dismissed?” Andrew said pointedly. Aaron’s mouth fell open, not quite comprehending that compassionate response, and then he shook his head. “Didn’t think so.”

“You can ignore me, it’s fine,” Will said quietly. “I’m used to it.”

“No,” Andrew said impassively. Heather looked upset by Will’s words and pulled him in for a hug. Will’s laugh was fond as he shrugged her off.

“Not by you Heather,” he assured her. Movement out the corner of his eye caught his attention and Andrew glanced over to see Neil coming around to stand at his side. Andrew watched as Neil drew closer, a little unsteady on his feet. Neil had three very specific stages of drunk. Tipsy Neil was nervous, quiet, sometimes stubborn. Then he had a fourth, maybe fifth, drink and he became a social butterfly, wanting to talk to everyone, dance, engage in conversations and have fun. His third stage was at six drinks until he passed out, and he seemed to have reached that point now. The Fox’s had called the third stage ‘baby’ drunk. Neil’s mind tunnel-visioned to Andrew. He sought his presence, often innocent physical touch, and he sounded sleepy when he spoke, easily reduced to giggles. Andrew put his drink in his left hand and lifted his right arm so Neil could sidle into his side, turning his attention back to the group. Kevin and Olivia didn’t react, the two most used to Andrew and Neil’s displays of affection subtle or otherwise, and Aaron looked disinterested by Neil’s recognisable state of inebriation. Heather and Jacob looked surprised, probably still put out by the truth behind the media rivalry, and Will looked curious.

“What are we talking about?” Neil asked, holding onto Andrew’s waist and linking his fingers with Andrew’s right hand where it rested on his shoulder.

“Kid’s deserving better,” Kevin mused. Will smiled shyly at Neil and nodded his head.

“Can I ask you two something?” Will wondered. Andrew, who had a mouthful of his drink, nodded his head.

“Sure can,” Neil agreed.

“How did you meet?” He asked. Andrew and Neil both opened their mouths to give the obvious answer, but Aaron beat them to it.

“We all played on the same team at college,” her said, gesturing at himself, Kevin, Andrew and Neil.

“No, I know. I meant specifically the first time Andrew and Neil met,” Will pressed. Andrew felt his lips twitch with an amused smile and when he tilted his face to look at Neil, he met unimpressed blue eyes.

“Don’t look so thrilled, it’s not funny,” Neil muttered. Andrew, who’s lips had quirked up at the question, felt himself smile more.

“It’s a little funny,” Andrew said.

“It wasn’t at the time,” Kevin put in.

“No one asked you,” Neil said before turning his attention to Will. “If you Google me you’ll have a better understanding of the context, but basically I was hiding in Arizona from some bad guys and had been since I was a kid and the Fox’s coach came to recruit me for the Fox’s and I freaked out and ran away. What I ran into was this asshole and he smashed an Exy racquet into my stomach and nearly broke my ribs.”

“Your first words to me were ‘fuck you’,” Andrew recalled. “I was on my meds though, so does that really count?”

“Well, I mean, the next time we met you were sober, but you were pretending to be Aaron and that’s worse in my opinion,” Neil answered.

“Being me is worse than nearly having your spleen ruptured by him?” Aaron asked, looking more offended than it probably warranted.

“Absolutely,” Neil cooed.

“So, I should delete the dating apps from my phone, run away from some bad guys who want to kill me and/or recruit me, and then let some buff guy ruin my lungs, and then maybe I’ll get a boyfriend?” Will asked. Andrew, who hadn’t paused to consider the sexuality of his new nephew, found he wasn’t surprised by this realisation. Kevin didn’t bat an eye, and neither did Heather. Jackson did a double take and Aaron looked up at the ceiling as if asking God why he was surrounded by half the queer population of America.

“I would stick with the dating apps,” Neil said seriously.

“Me too,” Andrew said, letting go of Neil’s hand to put his palm on the side of his face and push him closer to kiss his temple. When he let go, Will was looking down at his feet with a blush that Andrew understood. He’d been a few years older than Will was when Nicky had flown in from Germany to take him and Aaron in, but the feeling of shy curiosity, shame and wanting when hearing (or in this case seeing) an older man in a healthy relationship with another man was the same. “You’ll get there,” he said to Will now.

“If Andrew could find someone as equally fucked up as he is, you can too,” Aaron supplied, not entirely unhelpfully. “If you have any more questions, ask now. Neil is too drunk to filter his replies, and Andrew will sit back and let Neil talk about him for a good hour before getting bored.”

“How do you know that?” Jackson asked at the same time Neil cried, “Hey!”  
It wasn’t exactly a lie; Andrew didn’t mind it when Neil talked about all the things he liked about Andrew. It had been quite entertaining in Fox Towers, watching Dan, Matt and Allison look near enough traumatised every time they found out that Andrew potentially did have a soul. It took them over a year and more than one spring vacation after the girls graduated for the senior Foxes to get used to Andrew and Neil’s domesticity.

“We had a bet on it in junior year, so we counted how long it took Neil to get put to bed,” Kevin explained. “Neil doesn’t drink often, but we worked out pretty quick that before he passes out, he gets like this.” He gestured at Neil where he stood curled into Andrew like he would die if he was anywhere else. “We all had bets on how long Andrew let it go before putting an end to it.”

“To what? The touching or the talking?” Heather asked, the curiosity clearly getting the better of her.

“Seeing as though most of us are still uncomfortable touching Andrew, my bet was on the physical clinginess,” Aaron said. Neil made an annoyed noise and Andrew let him prove whatever point he was trying to prove by kissing Andrew’s cheek and nuzzling his nose against his skin.

“My bet was that the talking would put an end to it,” Kevin explained. “I figured Andrew would get bored about hearing how ‘built’ his arms were and lock Neil in the bedroom before coming back and threatening us with knives if we told anyone.”

“You make him sound like a monster,” Will said quietly, eyeing Andrew warily.

“That’s what they call me,” Andrew said. “In any case, they were all wrong and all right. The physical touching did bother me, but only because it was in a public. The talking bugged me too, but Neil always bugs me when he talks so that wasn’t new.”

“You got over it, the touching thing,” Jackson noted. Andrew glanced at where Neil was watching from where his head was resting on his shoulder, eyes half-lidded and looking on with a distant amusement.

“Not over it, just used to it,” Andrew said. Will bit his lip, looked around at all the adults and decided that the company was appropriate enough for him to ask his next question.

“How did you get used to it? How do you let it happen?” He asked. Judging by everyone’s curious looks, they were wondering the same thing. Most of them, if not all of them if Jackson followed the Fox’s story years ago, knew Andrew’s history and his trauma. They knew he had issues with personal space and boundaries, and Andrew knew that the fact he tolerated Neil crossing the lines he had in place for everyone else often baffled everyone else. Andrew looked down at Neil again who had a sleepy smile on his face and looked comfortable and content where he stood.

“Off me,” he said to Neil. His boyfriend immediately dropped his arm from Andrew’s waist and took a slightly unsteady half-step away from him, tilting his head in question, but not asking and not touching. “That’s why,” Andrew said. “Boundaries, trust, understanding.”

“Did you make me move to prove a point?” Neil grumbled. Andrew lifted his arm again for him to come back and pressed an apology kiss to the top of his head as he settled back down. Nobody seemed to have anything to say to that, but the understanding that crossed Will’s face was all that mattered. Andrew wished he’d had someone tell him what to expect, what was needed for him to feel safe and content with someone, and he felt a little warm in his stomach to think that perhaps he’d been able to help Will in some way. Before anyone could think to bring up a new subject, the music changed, and Will smiled wide. It was a slow song, one clearly made for slow dancing couples and the lyrics were soft and loving.

“I figured it was time,” Will said. Kevin and Aaron excused themselves in search of their girlfriends and Olivia kindly melted away to take over Dante’s babysitting so Jaiden and Oscar could dance. Allison found Renee, Grace found Laila, Jean and Jeremy followed suit. The living space was filled with dancing couples while those like Kevin’s friends, Andrew’s coach, Dante and Olivia watched from the outsides with mingled looks of fondness and jealousy. Jackson held his hand out to Heather with a sly smile and Will looked unamused, but he stepped away from his foster mom to let her dance and moved back inside to sit at his chair near the computer.

“Will you dance with me?” Neil murmured. Andrew snorted and met his eyes.

“You can’t dance right now,” he said.

“I could if you were holding me up a bit,” Neil pointed out.

“I don’t dance,” Andrew reminded him. Neil’s smile was slow and adoring and he moved to stand in front of Andrew, sliding his hands into his hair and kissing him into the balcony railing. Andrew’s heart went into overdrive, but not because of the kiss. He felt his free hand grab convulsively onto Neil’s vest and lean against him, away from the open air behind him. Neil must have felt the panic because he stepped back and pulled Andrew with him, smiling against his mouth.

“Sorry,” he whispered. Andrew kissed the apology away and Neil didn’t ask to dance again.

That night, when Neil was curled up asleep on Andrew’s chest and his breathing evened out, Andrew pressed a kiss to the top of his curls and spoke to him in quiet Russian.  
“I will dance with you one day,” he told his sleeping boyfriend. “On the day we get married.”


	25. "No More Airport Goodbyes."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's cute and emotional guys, you know me by now. I'm just here for the feels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do your homework, drink water, have something to eat, don't forget to take your meds!
> 
> If you're here because you've been reading this fic in one sitting from chapter one, please stretch and rest your eyes for five minutes <3

Neil woke up lying on Andrew’s chest, fingers curled against his mouth and head turned away from him, his head heavy with a hangover. He moaned and turned his face into Andrew’s neck, tucking his arms against himself. He felt Andrew’s arms come up around him in a tight squeeze, but it wasn’t comforting or kind, there was tension in his entire body and Neil rolled off him to the mattress.   
“Y’ good?” Neil mumbled around his thick tongue, forcing his eyes open against the bright light of the morning. Andrew was frozen, barely awake, and extremely uncomfortable, his hands fisted and chest still with a held breath. Neil yawned and moved a little further away to give Andrew as much room as he could, but he didn’t think he could get up without falling down again so he had to stay on the bed.   
“Thank you for not punching me,” he added.

“I was awake,” Andrew ground out. Neil knew that meant his panic response had set in when Neil moved against him and wasn’t something he couldn’t control in the moments between awake and asleep. Neil didn’t say anything to that, just let Andrew calm himself down, watching from half-lidded eyes. After a minute or two, he put his hand out and found a water bottle on the bedside table, rising on his elbow to guzzle desperately from it to try and soothe his cotton mouth. When he had a little more clarity, he lay down on his back and looked up at the ceiling, waiting for Andrew to come back out of his past and into the present with him. He ran through the events of the cocktail party with a small smile on his mouth, remembering the way he’d danced with his friends and the conversations he’d had around the room. He’d felt bubbly all night, happy to be around most of the people he cared about in the world, and as the night had started drawing to a close, he’d sunk into the heavy, sleepy, warm stage of intoxication and when Andrew had taken him to bed he’d gone willingly. Lying half on top of Andrew, wrapped up in his arms with his heartbeat strong and steady against his cheek, Neil always found it easy to fall asleep.   
Neil felt Andrew’s hand on his arm now, a firm demand to have him come back, so Neil rolled back across the bed to his original position on his chest and kissed his neck.

“Thanks for coming back to me,” Neil murmured. Andrew made an unimpressed noise, but he ran his hands up Neil’s sides in silent acknowledgement. Neil closed his eyes, feeling Andrew’s heartbeat again, and closed his eyes against his headache and the day, wanting to stay in Andrew’s arms forever… _holy fuck_. Neil felt every muscle in his body tense up as he remembered falling asleep last night, early that morning, in pretty much the same position. Andrew had kissed the top of his head and made a promise in his hair. ‘I will dance with you one day. On the day we get married.’ Andrew wanted to get married, one day. Neil had never really thought about it as a possibility. People had mentioned it in passing, questions and taunts from Allison, when they’d been at Nicky and Erik’s wedding in Germany, queries from Matt and McKenna and Oscar wondering if it would be something they could or would ever do. Neil had never put much stock in it. They were them; they didn’t need to wear a ring to know that what they had was real and important. They didn’t need to sign a piece of paper promising forever, they said it in their own ways. They knew it was for better or for worse, they’d survived worse long before now, they could deal with anything.

“What’s wrong?” Andrew asked, feeling Neil’s tension. His words cut through Neil’s panicked, confused thoughts and the tension melted from his body unexpectedly fast. What was wrong? Nothing. When, if, Andrew wanted to marry Neil, then there was nothing wrong. Neil would do that, he might even want to, because Andrew was more important to Neil than anyone was ever supposed to be.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Neil said quietly. He pressed a kiss to his neck again and Andrew shivered at the touch. Neil knew he shouldn’t tease, he was in no fit state to initiate sex with the hangover he had, but he wanted Andrew to know he loved him. He kissed him again before groggily sitting up a little and looking down into his face. “Thank you.”

“For?” Andrew asked, one hand paused over his eye where he’d been rubbing sleep out of it and a frown tugging at his eyebrows.

“For being you,” Neil said, meaning it with every part of his being. Andrew made a face and went back to rubbing the sleep from his eye.

“Go back to sleep, you’re hungover,” he said, expression bored. Neil settled back down and closed his eyes, letting himself drift back to sleep with Andrew’s hand a comforting weight on the small of his back.

*

When Neil woke again it was nearly ten and Andrew wasn't in the bed. Neil had fallen asleep on top of him and didn't remember Andrew getting up or moving him. He swallowed down the initial surge of concern and anxiety as he got into a seated position and stretched out his shoulders. After a moment of waking up, he climbed from the bed and pulled on sweatpants and a tank top that might have been his but was probably Andrew's and went in search of his missing goalie. And coffee. He really needed coffee.   
He found both in the kitchen.

"Finally," Andrew said, pushing a mug of coffee along the counter towards him. Neil ignored it in favour of standing at Andrew's back and sliding his arms around his waist, pressing a kiss to his shoulder and smiling against his shirt. "What's with you?"

"Nothing, I'm just really happy," Neil said. What he didn't say was that he was really happy because he had Andrew. He'd never expected to live this long, let alone get to fall in love and play Exy professionally and host a cocktail party for his friends. He'd not even thought he'd ever have friends, but he did. In two days he'd watch his brother and his boyfriend go head to head for a second consecutive championship, in five days he'd be driving back across the country to pack his bag and move out, within two weeks he'd be officially living in Chicago, and hopefully within a month he'd have a place with his boyfriend that was just theirs. He was never supposed to have a good life, but goddamn he felt like the luckiest man alive in that very moment.   
Andrew stayed with his hips leaning on the counter, drinking his coffee while Neil hugged him from behind, and Neil knew he was appreciating the attention even if he wasn't going to admit it.

After a couple of minutes Neil withdrew, seeking the mug of coffee and he let Andrew tug him over to the couch by the front of his tank top until they were seated next to each other. Neil waited until Andrew had made himself comfortable against the arm and pulled his legs onto the couch before lying against him with his back on his chest, head propped on his shoulder and using on of Andrew's knees as an arm rest. Andrew put his mug on the end table and draped his arm lazily over Neil's middle, dropping a kiss against Neil's cheek. Neil felt his breath on his neck and his eyelashes fluttering against cheekbones and his heartbeat against the back of his ribcage. Whether Andrew said it or not, Neil knew he was feeling just as good about their life as he did in that moment.

"Thank you for the coffee," Neil said, cupping it between his hands. Andrew made a noise in acknowledgement but didn't speak. "Are we doing anything today?" Neil asked. Andrew didn't answer right away, he tapped an agitated beat on Neil's stomach and Neil could hear him grinding his teeth as he thought about it.

"No," he said at last. Andrew's reluctance to speak at all, let alone in long sentences told Neil he was still a little drained from socializing until the early hours of that morning and would need the day to recuperate. This somewhat empty seeming Andrew was the one most people saw all the time, with the exception of the physical contact of course, and Neil felt bad for them. They didn't get to see past the blank defences to the caring, thoughtful, loving man beneath. This blank Andrew made people nervous. Nothing about Andrew made Neil nervous, he'd never been scared of him and he sure as fuck wasn't scared of him now. A buzzing at Neil's hip made him jump and Andrew tightened his grip to keep Neil down.

"Nicky," Andrew muttered by way of explanation. Right, it was Thursday morning, designated Nicky video calling time.

"If you don't answer it, he'll be on the next flight out here, or he'll ring me," Neil said when Andrew didn't make a move to get the phone. Andrew's silence told Neil he didn't care, but that didn't stop Neil fishing around in Andrew's pant pocket to find it and pull it out. "Hey Nicky," Neil said when the video call connected.

"Neil!" Nicky chirped happily. "Is that my asshole cousin with you?"

"No Aaron isn't here, but I have your other cousin behind me," Neil answered. Nicky's laugh was surprised and pleased, and Neil felt Andrew smile.

"You're getting funnier as you get older," Nicky decided.

"Thanks, it's Andrew's influence," Neil replied. Andrew pinched the skin of his stomach in what was probably warning, but Neil just pushed his hand away. Nicky laughed and shook his head, the camera wobbling as he did so.

"I refuse to believe he has a sense of humour," Nicky said.

"Be nice!" Erik called from offscreen. Nicky glanced in that direction past the camera.

"Nah," he said, smiling at his husband. Andrew lifted his head then, finally looking at his cousin's face on the screen.

"Where are you?" He demanded. Neil frowned, looking past Nicky at the wall behind him and seeing what Andrew saw. The wall was white whereas a lot of the walls in their home were coloured, and the painting of a boat that hung there was definitely not something Nicky would ever choose.

"Oh, I'm in a hotel," Nicky said, trying for nonchalant and falling short.

"Why?" Neil asked curiously.

"Surprise romantic getaway," Erik said before Nicky had a chance. The tall, broad, dark haired man came into view as he moved to stand next to Nicky, his friendly smile directed at the camera. "Hello Neil, Andrew," he said.

"Hey Erik," Neil said before pausing, but when Andrew didn't say anything he spoke again. "Andrew says hello too."

"No, he doesn't," Andrew grumbled, choosing to be difficult.

"Why so grumpy?" Nicky taunted, knowing he was safe enough away not to get a knife to the gut. Andrew still tensed as if thinking about trying and Neil rolled his eyes at Nicky.

"Not grumpy, just tired from the party last night," Neil said carefully. Nicky's face lit up with a grin at the mention of the party.

"Speaking of! You both looked so good then. I saw your posts on Instagram this morning!" He said. Throughout the night the people who'd been at the party posted pictures to social media after checking with anyone who you could see in the pic if it was okay. Neil had posted a picture with Kevin, Allison, Renee, Andrew and Aaron with a simple Fox emoji and using the #FirstFoxes tag, as well as a picture with his Scorpion friends and green and brown hearts in the caption, the colours of the Scorpions. He'd told his friends he was leaving, but apparently McKenna had already told them, and they'd all very excitedly hugged him and promised to stay in touch.

"We did look good, and it was fun," Neil agreed.

"Have you been online this morning? The shitshow this party created… oh my God," Nicky crowed. Erik put a steadying hand on his shoulder and Nicky took a deep breath. Neil frowned, curiosity and concern warring in his stomach.

"What shitshow?" He asked. Nicky clapped excitedly and even Erik looked amused.

"Well first of all, Jeremy posted a picture from before the event kissing Jean's cheek with a cheeky caption of 'And you thought we were just friends' which has unleashed madness," Nicky said. Neil felt a bubble of pride and smiled. 

"Good for them, I know they've been thinking about going public for a while," he said.

"That's not even all of the drama," Erik warned.

"What next?"

"The Minyard Josten Rivalry tag trended again," Erik said. Neil's eyes went wide, and Andrew huffed at his shoulder. The world still believed they hated each other, and whenever either of them were mentioned in the media, their longstanding rivalry was brought up every time. Articles were still being written, fans dissected and argued online about it, and people asked them online and in person whenever they got the chance. However, the tag hadn't been in the top five trending for over a month because neither of them had purposely antagonized anything.

"How? We didn't do anything! I spent the last couple of hours of the party in his back pocket!" Neil said.

"Did you get 'baby drunk'?" Nicky asked.

"Shut the fuck up, Nicky," Neil warned, but Nicky just laughed. "Why did it trend?"

"Mainly because of the picture Olivia posted of you and her," Nicky explained. Andrew had taken the picture at Olivia's request, her mid-spin under Neil's arm so her dress twirled out, their hands touching above her. In the pic she was smiling regally, and Neil looked mesmerised by her beauty. In reality, Neil had been fascinated by the movement of the dress, although she did look beautiful.

“Andrew wasn’t even in the picture; he was taking it!” Neil said.

“Yes, well, everyone is losing their minds thinking you’re making moves on his girlfriend,” Nicky said, grinning so wide it was comical. Neil rubbed his forehead.

“That’s so stupid, Olivia has a partner,” Neil moaned.

“Absolutely, but there’s more,” Nicky said. Andrew made a vaguely disinterested noise, but he didn’t get up to leave or make Neil move.

“What else could there be? We didn’t do anything!” Neil said again.

“Kevin posted a picture of you and him with you on his shoulders and captioned it with ‘Clearly not #TeamMinyard tonight’,” Nicky said.

“And Allison posted a pic with you too with the ‘team Josten’ hashtag,” Erik said.

“It’s okay because someone named Heather and a guy named Jackson, and of course darling Renee all posted with the Minyard tag so it’s fine. It just triggered the war again,” Nicky said. Neil sighed and leaned into Andrew.

“We don’t even need to be assholes anymore,” he mused. Andrew’s huff was amused, and it made Neil smile.

“Wait until we’re on the same team,” Andrew said before pushing Neil hard enough to get him moving and sliding off the couch to get away from the call for a bit. That didn’t bother Nicky who had started squawking about the mention of Neil’s transfer. Neil explained to him that the Lions would only trade one of their strikers and at the party last night McKenna had quietly told Neil it was his idea to swap him. Coach Fierro had wanted to swap out Harmony, but McKenna had wanted to give Neil the chance to be in Chicago while he had it.

“Aw man that is going to be so much dirt for the rivalry,” Nicky cheered. “Does Andrew’s team know about you two?”

“Not really, not outside Alex Rossen and Olivia I guess,” Neil answered.

“So, they think you hate each other,” Erik said with a considering look on his face. Neil remembered the curious and concerned looks the Lions always sent his way whenever he was around them and nodded at the couple on the phone.

“Absolutely, if they don’t already know that I’m transferring then they will be very worried when they find out,” Neil said. “Probably expecting us to have a punch up.” Neil leaned back against the cushion Andrew had abandoned just as something small and soft smacked him in the back of his head. He ducked on instinct and both Nicky and Erik laughed as Neil fumbled around for whatever it was that had assaulted him. He found the dinosaur plush toy that had been thrown at him and looked down at it with a fond smile. It was a toy Andrew had won for him a year ago at the Santa Monica Pier. He didn’t sleep with it, but it had spent a lot of time on his bed in Portland and was always stuffed in his bag whenever he travelled for games. Andrew must have found it just now in Neil’s duffel bag. He looked away from the blue and green toy at Andrew where he stood in the doorway with an unreadable look on his face.

“You disgust me,” he said. Neil quirked his eyebrow, wondering what it was exactly that he’d done to warrant that, knowing that Andrew was using insults in an attempt to explain what it was he was feeling. “You kept it.” Andrew crossed his arms stubbornly. Neil glanced at the toy then at the phone where Nicky was barely containing his curiosity and Erik was looking mildly uncomfortable.

“I’m going to go,” Neil said. Erik waved goodbye and hung up the call before Nicky could get out a proper protestation. He put the phone in his sweatpants pocket and held the dinosaur to his chest as he made it wave at Andrew. In response, Andrew turned on his heel and walked away. Neil looked down at the dinosaur and shook his head, getting to his feet to follow his boyfriend back to their bedroom. Andrew was sitting in the chair near the window with his arms wrapped around his leg, knee drawn to his chest. His expression was blank, his gaze empty as he watched Neil come into the room, but Neil wasn’t fooled. Andrew’s fingers were tapping an uneven beat on his arm, something Neil had learnt meant Andrew was agitated, calculating. Neil also knew he pushed forward his apathetic defence when he was feeling too intensely and didn’t know how to process it. Neil sat on the bed across from him, the dinosaur clasped in his lap, and looked at Andrew’s profile. He waited patiently, letting Andrew make the decisions. After a few minutes Andrew shifted in his chair to face Neil, fingers stilling their tapping.

“Why do you have it?” Andrew asked quietly, without inflection.

“You gave it to me,” Neil answered honestly. Andrew made an unimpressed face and stared Neil down, waiting to hear more. Neil sighed and lifted the dinosaur up to eye-level so they could both look at it. “I mean it, Drew; you gave it to me, so I kept it. You gave me clothes in my freshman year, but before that I can’t remember the last time anyone gave me a gift. I’ve kept everything you’ve ever given me, stupid toy included.” Neil put the dinosaur back down in his lap and shrugged at Andrew who had lifted his chin off his knee while he listened.

“I know that. Why do you have it _here_?” Andrew said, a small amount of inflection on the last word. Neil’s lips curled in a smile, understanding a little more. Andrew wasn’t asking about why Neil had kept it, he knew of Neil’s small sentimentality for the gifts he received from Andrew, he didn’t know why Neil carried it around when he travelled and for some reason that had gotten under his skin.

“I don’t really know,” Neil admitted. “I take it when I travel for games, I kind of just like having it around because it reminds me of you.”

“You’re the worst,” Andrew said impassively. Neil put the dinosaur on the bed beside him and crossed to kneel in front of where Andrew was seated, looking up into his face and not touching him.

“Being away from you for two years hasn’t been easy,” Neil said, not looking away from him. The vulnerability made his skin crawl, but he needed to say it. “I liked playing with the Scorpions and taking the Foxes to championships one last time was incredible, but Drew I wanted to be here with you every single day. Bringing the dinosaur reminded me of LA, of you.”

“Of the kittens,” Andrew said. Neil smiled and held his hands up, palms up in invitation. Andrew put his knee down and put his hands in Neil’s, eyes half-closing and he let out a long, soft breath.

“You liked the kittens more than I did,” Neil said, remembering the way Andrew treated the tiny creature.

“I hated them,” Andrew said. Neil got up and sat down on Andrew’s legs, putting his arm around his shoulders and pressed his face into his neck.

“I meant it, Andrew,” he murmured.

“What part?” Andrew replied.

“I loved it in Portland, but I wanted to be here with you.” Neil’s voice was muffled by Andrew’s skin, but he clearly heard him, judging by the slow way he put his arms around his waist and held him closer. Neil would have never been able to put into words the ache he felt during the weeks and months he’d gone without being around Andrew. It had been a physical weight on his shoulders to be without him, but he didn’t have to feel that anymore. As usual, being around Andrew took the weight off Neil and he could breathe easier. Being on the same team with him again, knowing when he went back to Portland that Andrew would be with him and they would be leaving again together made him feel light.

“You’re an idiot,” Andrew said quietly.

“I know,” Neil said. “But you love me anyway.”

“Shut up,” Andrew growled. Neil smiled and kissed his neck softly, causing Andrew to shiver. They stayed like that for a moment, quiet and close, but mostly for Andrew’s benefit as he tried to gather his thoughts and organise his feelings. Neil felt Andrew put his fingers in Neil’s hair, rubbing curls between his fingers, and the other hand slid under Neil’s shirt to trace over his scars. He let Andrew’s fingers wander as he thought, keeping his own hands still on Andrew’s shoulders as he waited.   
“It was hard for me, too,” Andrew said into the silence, tugging Neil’s hair once. “I wanted you here too, I wanted you close.”

“I’m here now,” Neil murmured. He sensed Andrew’s smile, a silent break through his apathy, and he pulled back to see it. Andrew cupped Neil’s cheek and rubbed his circular scar with his thumb, before pulling him down for a kiss. It was gentle, lingering, but Neil sank into it wholly and closed his eyes tight. They didn’t have to put the country between them again, they didn’t have to drive thirty-one hours or sit in a plane just to spend a few nights together. They were finally going to be able to do this together again.

*

Olivia didn’t surface from her room until nearly three that afternoon, looking supremely hungover as she guzzled water directly from the kitchen sink. Neil watched her with mild fascination, his camera momentarily forgotten in his hands.   
“That’s hot,” he said sarcastically when she stood up and wiped her mouth with the hem of her partner’s tee shirt.

“I know,” she said. “I’m also going to be late to the movie if I don’t get ready now,” she added, darting off back to her room. Olivia’s partner hadn’t been able to come to the party because the bookshop café they owned was open until midnight and they worked the late shift on Wednesday nights. Neil had asked why Riley didn’t roster someone else for that Wednesday, but Olivia had explained that they didn’t like messing up the roster too much because their college aged employees depended on the routine.

“People think we’re dating!” He called after her. He heard Olivia’s footsteps stop before backtracking down the hall and appearing again.

“What?”

“People think we’re dating. That I’m stealing you from Andrew,” he said. She frowned and looked towards the balcony where Andrew was sitting.

“I’m dating Riley,” she said as if he didn’t already know that. He pulled a face at her and she smiled apologetically. “Right, captain obvious. But my relationship is not exactly hidden, they just keep choosing to think I’m lying.”

“They, being the media?” He asked. She nodded. “I know, same here.”

“What’re you doing anyway?” She asked, gesturing at the Nikon camera in his hands. It wasn’t the fanciest camera and well and truly a few years old by now, but over the years he’d bought lenses and attachments to go with it. He wasn’t about to become a professional photographer, but it wasn’t exactly unusual to the people who knew him to see him carrying it around sometimes. Andrew had actually bought it for him when he’d seen how much Neil liked the pictures on the walls at the Foxhole Court and he liked taking pictures of his friends. With his camera phone, he hadn’t really needed to take out the clunky device, but he’d used it for a bit at the party the night before and wanted to download the pictures to his laptop and edit them now that he was feeling less hungover.

“Just messing around with some of the settings while my laptop updates,” Neil answered. “I’ll edit some of the pics and email them to people later tonight.”

“It’s fascinating to me that you have a hobby outside of Exy and Andrew,” she mused. Neil made a face at her that made her laugh and he rolled his eyes, but it wasn’t exactly something he was genuinely annoyed at. In fact, he was kind of amused.

“People tell me that a lot,” he admitted. She hummed, turned on her heel and went back the way she’d come to finish getting ready for her date.

It wasn’t long before she’d come flouncing back down the hallway dressed for her movie date with makeup on and everything. Neil had only just put his updated laptop on the kitchen counter and plugged in the camera when she reappeared.   
“Take a photo with me,” She said. Neil frowned at her and she smiled pleadingly, waving her phone.

“Why?”

“Because I want to take a page out of your book and be a brat to the media,” she said, waving her phone around. “Andrew get your ass in here!”

“What are you doing?” Neil asked, turning to look in the direction of the balcony as Andrew got to his feet and headed inside at the summon.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to out you,” she said dismissively, moving to stand between the two barstools. Andrew appeared with a stony look on his face and when Olivia gestured at the second barstool on the other side of her, he stared at it unmoving. “Get on the chair.”

“Why?”

“I want to take a photo of the three of us,” she said. Andrew didn’t look impressed, but after a moment of stubborn deliberation he climbed up and spun the chair around to face her camera. “You take it,” she said, handing the phone to Neil. He sighed, took the phone and held it out so that the three of them were framed in the shot. “Now, kiss my cheeks,” she said, and Neil saw her sly grin on the screen.

“Have you lost your mind?” Neil asked her. Andrew didn’t look any more impressed now than he had a moment ago, but that could also be because Olivia hadn’t yet asked him to do anything and was giving orders. If she wasn’t careful, he was going to snap at her and walk off, and Neil thought perhaps he might not be far behind.

“No, I haven’t. Would you both kiss my cheeks for a picture? I want to post it on Instagram after all the boyfriend talk,” she said, seeming to catch onto her mistake. She didn’t say please, having learnt that lesson living with Andrew for two years, but she did ask. Neil peered past her at Andrew and he rolled his eyes in reluctant agreement. Neil held the camera up again and held it steady as he kissed her gently on the cheek, the lined scars on his own cheek shining under the kitchen light. He pulled back after taking the picture and clicked on it so they could see. It was actually kind of sweet, both men had their eyes closed as they pressed their lips to her cheeks, and she had a smile on her lips and her nose wrinkled adorably.   
“Thank you,” she said. Andrew slid from his seat, taking the dismissal and walked off without a word, but Neil heard the balcony door open and close again as he went back outside to freak himself out about being so high up or whatever he was doing out there. Neil knew that he wasn’t out there to smoke after giving it up to go pro, but after so many years of being close to Andrew, Neil had started associating the smell of cigarettes with him instead of the day his mom had died.It had been easy enough to let it go when Andrew himself had given up the habit, but sometimes he missed the days they’d sat on the roof sharing truths, cigarettes and kisses.

“What are you going to caption it with?” Neil asked Olivia, pushing the memory aside to revisit later.

“You’ll see,” she said. “I have to go now, but I’ll see you tonight!”

“Bye then,” Neil said, turning back to his laptop and the camera.

It wasn’t even ten minutes later when his phone buzzed with the Instagram notification as Olivia posted the picture.   
_‘My ‘boyfriends’ think I look cute for my date tonight. You know, with my actual partner. @Rileyrose_books see you soon cute stuff.’_

“Touché,” Neil said, liking the picture. The comments started pouring in immediately. Nobody seemed to give a flying fuck that Olivia was in a relationship. All of the questions and comments wanted to know why Neil was still at their apartment and how she’d managed to convince them to be civil enough to take the photo with her. Neil hesitated before taking a screenshot of the questions under the picture and posting them to Twitter. _‘She asked. @officialoliviahoward @aminyard03’_  
Matt Boyd replied to it immediately, making Neil laugh aloud.   
_‘There you go again with that ‘asking’ bullshit. I thought I knew what it was about you that got Andrew to do shit back in college, but Olivia doesn’t have that same appeal so what is it?!’  
‘You just have to ask…’ _Neil replied before turning off his phone. It really was that simple. You ask Andrew, you respect his answer. It wasn’t that hard. Olivia knew it (mostly), Neil knew it, Aaron and Kevin had learnt it although Kevin still toed the line when he was feeling brave.

*

Neil had known that the picture was going to cause chaos, he’d known it would stir up stories that they weren’t enemies, but that it would also create more drama for the majority of people who did believe in the rivalry. What Neil hadn’t expected was the sheer amount of people who edited Olivia out of the picture and made it look like they were kissing. All his mentions on Twitter were tagging him in the edited pictures, which he thought was weird enough, and the number of people getting excited about said pictures astounded him.   
“Hey, baby?” Andrew said, finally coming back into the house.

“Yeah?” Neil answered, looking over his shoulder. Andrew was frowning down at his phone, but he looked up to meet Neil’s gaze.

“Do we actually look like that when we kiss?” He asked. Neil snorted, taken by surprise by the question, and shrugged.

“There’s only two pictures that exist where we are kissing and it’s that one Allison took your senior year on the bus ride back from the Christmas banquet and the one after the kitten interview,” Neil said. After the banquet, Andrew had been half-asleep against the window, tie loosened and the top two or three buttons undone on his shirt. Neil hadn’t worn a suit jacket to the event, but he’d had Andrew’s on over his shoulders because he’d gotten cold and Andrew had tossed it at him like it was nothing. In the picture, Neil was tucked into his side and sleepily asked for a kiss without even thinking about the fact that they were surrounded by the Foxes. Andrew had obliged with a small tilt of his head and his eyes closing completely while Neil wrapped his tie around his fingers and smiled into the kiss. That picture was soft and tired, and it looked warm and comfortable and they both had a copy of it, but the original was hung up in the Foxhole Court with all of the others. It was nothing like the cold, unfeeling, photoshopped kiss spreading around like wildfire.

“I want to take one,” Andrew said. Neil tilted his head in question. “A picture, of us kissing. A proper one without Olivia in the way.”

“Okay, sure,” Neil agreed. He slid down from his stool and crossed the space between them, but before he could kiss him, Andrew went back onto the balcony expecting Neil to follow. Neil did, but he would follow Andrew anywhere. Andrew put his back to the balcony rail and held his phone out to Neil, camera open, which Neil decided meant Andrew wanted the picture in his possession. Neil put his hand in Andrew's hair and let Andrew pull him close by his waist and when their lips met Neil momentarily forgot he was supposed to be taking a picture. Andrew, who had fought with words all day, kissed Neil like everything he wanted to say could be passed between their lips. All the mixed emotions he'd felt about Neil traveling with the dinosaur, the hurt when they'd talked about the distance between them, the relief in knowing that was over, it was all there. _I love you, I love you, I love you_. It passed between them, effortless and unspoken, but honest. Neil finally remembered the camera and snapped the picture before sliding the phone into Andrew's sweatpants pocket. He didn't even care if it was a good picture, he just wanted to keep kissing him. Andrew pushed him back and Neil went, but he pulled Andrew after him and they nearly tripped over each other's feet and Neil caught the balcony lounge chair for support. Andrew's breathing was shallow, and he sank into the chair, pulling Neil on top of him. Neil wedged his knees in the cushions on either side of Andrew’s hips and buried his fingers in Andrew's hair, kissing him without pausing for air. Andrew put his hands under Neil's shirt, his cold fingers finding the scars that he loved. Neil tilted Andrew's head back by pulling on his hair to deepen the kiss and Andrew reacted in kind. Neil couldn't explain the pressure building behind his ribs, it felt like his heart was swelling and crawling up his throat as they kissed. _Stay. Come home. I missed you. I'm proud of you. You were amazing. Thank you. Come back. Let's go to bed. I love you. I love you. I love you._ The relief that Neil didn't have to say goodbye again, that the two years apart were over, felt like it was going to crush Neil as it bore down on him. Neil couldn’t remember the last time he’d cried, and he had never cried from happiness or relief before, but tears pooled in his eyes now and he clung tighter to Andrew. He squeezed his eyes shut against the prickling behind his eyes, but it didn’t help, and the tears slid down his cheeks. He was breathless from kissing without pause and he gasped against Andrew’s mouth, pulling in air as the relief choked him. Andrew didn’t pull away, if anything he pulled him closer and kissed away his tears.   
When Neil could breathe again and his tears had dried, he pressed their lips together. The kiss was salty and bruising, but Neil sighed and felt everything wash away. Andrew kissed him three times in quick succession before pulling away and putting one hand on the back of Neil’s neck, peering up into his face.

“What was all that about?” He asked quietly. Neil pried one hand out of Andrew’s hair and wiped his cheek and nose with the back of his wrist, sniffing in an unattractive move that just made Andrew roll his eyes.

“Relief, I think,” he said. Andrew raised an eyebrow.

“About what? Nothing changed,” he said.

“That when I go back to Portland next week, you will come too, and we’ll be leaving together. No more airport goodbyes,” he explained. Andrew smiled, small and fleeting, but it was there as he pulled Neil down to his chest and held him close, propping his chin on the top of Neil’s head.

“No more airport goodbyes,” Andrew agreed softly. Neil closed his eyes and melted into Andrew’s embrace, staying there until his knees started hurting from straddling him and their stomach’s started growling in demand for dinner, the sun well and truly dipped behind the horizon and the sky an inky black.   
As they walked into the apartment to order dinner, Andrew pulled his phone out to look at the picture Neil nearly hadn’t taken. The sky was pinkish purple from the setting sun behind them and their eyes were closed. The kiss was claiming, so much so you could see it in the picture with Neil’s hand curled firmly in the back of his hair and Andrew pressed as close as he could possibly be. Five and a half years of devotion captured in the one kiss, in the one picture. Neil didn’t miss Andrew’s small smile as he slid his phone back into his pocket and closed the door behind them.


	26. "Josten, Who's Your Girlfriend?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Championships take two!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: Harmony induced transphobia and racism mention (dw, the Scorpions back Lulu up!) 
> 
> I hope you like the chapter guys <3   
> Thank you for all of the comments you have been giving me, they really do make my day! 
> 
> I wrote a Twinyard therapy session with Betsy (the one where Aaron outs Andrew's relationship), so if you wanna read that then you can: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27008917   
> Or you can subscribe to me as a user and get notifications when I post new content!

Neil climbed out of his car in the parking lot, grateful that he’d called ahead that year and reserved parking in the VIP section. Neil didn’t consider himself VIP, but his car was full of pro players, so it hadn’t been hard to score a bay. All of Andrew, Kevin’s and Neil’s old team were going to be there and they wore their orange bands like they had last year, except for Matt and Dan because they were one month away from welcoming their child into the world. They’d both Tweeted a picture with their bands, hands held up, with _‘Proud of you @aminyard03 @kevinqueenofexy #FirstFoxes’_ but Matt had also put _#TeamJosten_ in his Tweet and Dan evened it out with a _#TeamMinyard._ Dante, Lulu, Oscar and Jaiden tumbled out of the car behind Neil, still arguing about which High School Musical was the best. They’d made Neil watch all three of them on the weekend the Scorpions had played against the Lions after Lulu had brought them over after pizza. Neil had been delighted and astonished that they all knew the words to every song, but he’d been even more delighted by the fact that Andrew knew them as well. Neil had felt Andrew’s lips moving against his neck as he’d mouth along with the lyrics, his fingers moving against Neil’s chest as if he was playing along with a piano.   
“Neil you haven’t voted yet, break the tie,” Lulu begged. Dante put his forearm on her shoulder and looked at Neil expectantly.

“Guys, you know I don’t give a fuck,” Neil told them.

“I’m his best friend, that makes his vote mine by proxy,” Oscar said.

“Actually, I’m his best friend so it’s a vote for the first movie,” Dante shot back.

“Actually, I’m his best friend,” said a familiar voice from behind him. Neil grinned and whirled around to face Robin. She was wearing Lion yellow with her orange band and Fox bandana, a pleased smile on her face.

“Robin!” He yelled and scooped her up in a bear hug. Video calls and out of context pictures sent over text message was nothing compared to seeing her again. She laughed and hugged him back, squeezing his shoulders tightly.

“I missed you,” she said when they let go.

“Yeah, I missed you, too,” he agreed. “Weren’t we meeting you inside?”

“Carter saw you pull up, so we came over,” Robin explained, gesturing over her shoulder at the sophomore backliner standing back with an awkward smile.

“Hey man,” Neil said to him. “You played a good season,” he added. Carter was the backliner Aaron had chosen to replace him, and even Neil had to admit he’d made a good choice. The kid had been pretty good to Robin too, which was important to Neil.

“Thanks captain,” Carter said, his smile growing into a grin of pride. Neil felt nostalgic at being called ‘captain’ again for the first time in a year.

“I don’t know if either of you will remember from last year’s championship party, but these are some of the Portland Scorpions,” Neil said, making the introductions.

“Where is everyone else?” Robin asked after the greetings were exchanged. Neil pulled his phone out of his pocket to check if anyone had updated him on their whereabouts.

“Well Kevin, Olivia and Drew are already here, obviously,” he said. “Allison says her, and Renee, have found Aaron, Katelyn, Grace, Laila, Heather and Will inside,” he added, looking up from the text message.

“McKenna and Carly are on their way, but they’re stuck in game day traffic,” Oscar said, waving his phone around for proof.

“And I don’t know where Thea, Jean and Jeremy, and Jackson- Andrew’s friend from the gym- are,” he said, giving Robin the side explanation of who Jackson was. Allison had booked a box for the group to watch the game in, with food and drinks service, private toilets and comfortable seating. There was also a balcony outside you could stand on to watch the game in the screaming atmosphere the box is otherwise protected from by big glass walls. Inside the box, you couldn’t be seen by cameras or fans in the stadium, but if you wanted photo opportunities you could go out on the balcony. That was why the boxes were often hired by celebrities and pro players to hold little game day parties in, instead of being down in the middle of it. Neil would have preferred to be down in the middle of it, but he was planning to stay out on the balcony for the game to be as close as he could be.

“No way! Coach?” Carter yelled excitedly. Neil spun, following Carter’s line of sight to Wymack where he stood with Abby and a third female. It appeared like they’d been on their way towards the group when they’d gotten accosted by reporters. It took Neil a moment to realise the third person was Betsy Dobson because her hair was lighter and longer than he remembered from last time he’d seen her. Tucked into her jeans, she had on a Lion’s jersey with Andrew’s name and number on the back, and she was waiting patiently for the press to stop harassing her friends. Neil hadn’t visited Abby or Wymack since the pro league had started six months ago and seeing them now made him feel lighter and more at home. He reached out for Robin’s hand, gestured at the Scorpions that they would be back in a moment, and Carter followed the duo towards the Fox’s staff. The reporters saw their approach and started taking pictures before Wymack even noticed what was going on.

“Hey Coach,” Neil said. Wymack’s smile was as fierce as Abby’s hug.

“Shouldn’t you lot already be inside?” Wymack asked gruffly when Abby let Neil go.

“We’re on our way,” Carter answered.

“Are you sitting with us in the box?” Robin asked the three of them, everyone dutifully ignoring the cameras and microphones pointed their way.

“Allison upgraded our tickets at Kevin’s expense,” Betsy answered with a kind smile.

“We couldn’t make it last year, but wild horses couldn’t stop us this year,” Abby added with a genuinely happy smile.

“You get to see your son win in real time,” Neil said, eyes on Wymack who couldn’t hide his proud smile. The reporters, who had already been taking pictures of Neil and Robin’s handholding, jumped on his words.

“Does that mean you are backing the Tornadoes tonight?” Reporter one asked.

“Do you not have faith in the Lions to win?” The second put in.

“Does this have anything to do with your rivalry against Minyard?” The third added. Neil wanted to melt into the shadows the building behind them was casting in the dusky evening, but he couldn’t. He also couldn’t announce that he was actually a Lion going into the new season so of course the team had his full support, because he’d been told to keep it under wraps until the championships were over. Just beyond the VIP carpark were hordes of people filing through the gates to fill the stadium and Neil considered running over and joining them. Instead, he turned his attention on the reporters without missing Wymack’s warning look.

“I’m just here to have a good night and watch a good game,” he said as politely as he could.

“Josten, who’s your girlfriend?” The third reporter asked. Neil shot Robin a side-eyed look, but she looked bored of the question too.

“This is Robin Cross, but she’s not-” Neil was cut off by the first reporter.

“No, the one you were caught making out with a couple of days ago! It’s all over the internet, haven’t you seen?”

“What?” Neil asked. He hadn’t been online for a couple of days, nobody inside the apartment had been. Andrew had been devouring books and Neil had spent the past two days split between hanging out with him, exploring Chicago with Dante and Lulu, or practicing at a local court a five-minute walk away from the lake. Kevin had gone with him yesterday afternoon to work off nervous energy and they’d spent four hours scrimmaging with a handful of local kids between sixteen and twenty-three years of age, Neil on one team and Kevin on the other. The kids had been ecstatic to play with them, but Neil and Kevin had only agreed if they promised not to post on social media that they were there because they really did just want to practice. Teaching the kids had been fun for both Kevin and Neil, and distracted Kevin from his nerves. When they retired, Neil wondered if they’d both go into coaching. At any rate, Neil had boycotted social media for two days.

“Thursday night when you were at Minyard and Howard’s apartment, you were caught kissing someone on the balcony,” the first reporter explained. Neil felt his eyes widen and his stomach bottomed out. He turned accusing looks on Robin and Carter, and in turn Wymack and Abby.

“Why didn’t any of you tell me we were photographed?” He demanded.

“We thought you knew,” Robin said with a sheepish shrug.

“Well I didn’t!” He said. He reached for his phone to see the picture but paused. The reporter had asked who his girlfriend was, so it must not have been obvious from the picture circulating who it was he was kissing.

“You okay?” Wymack asked, putting a hand on Neil’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I just want to see the picture,” he said. The second reporter held his own phone out, screen on, and a picture of Neil straddling someone’s legs on the balcony lounge and kissing them deeply was on display. You could tell it was Neil because of his identifiable curly auburn hair and the trademark black hoodie that was still technically not his. But it wasn’t clear who he was kissing. All you could see was the soles of black socks, black sweatpants and locks of blonde hair tangled in his fingers. Everything was covered by Neil’s head and body, even Andrew’s hands were under Neil’s clothes so you couldn’t see the bands. He shook his head and handed the phone back.

“Who is she?” The reporter pressed, sliding the phone into his pocket.

“No comment,” Neil ground out, the only thing he had retained from any of his media training. 

“If you won’t comment on the girlfriend, do you care to comment on the rumour Harmony Lexington has been spreading about you?” The first reporter asked. Neil was starting to feel desperately trapped and agitated. Still, the question made him nervous and curious. Out of the corner of his eye, Neil saw the congregation near his car heading over and he was silently glad for their backup.

“What rumours?” He sighed.

“That the only reason you turned down a relationship with Lulu Davis was because you’re transphobic and racist,” the first reporter said. Neil’s blood boiled.

“That’s enough,” Wymack snapped at the reporters.

“You’re well out of line,” Abby added, stepping in to defend Neil. Betsy also moved closer to her friends to close ranks as Robin and Carter moved closer to Neil.

“Is it true though?” The reporter pressed.

“No.” The voice was firm and familiar. The Scorpions and Jaiden had drawn close and it was Lulu who had spoken. She put her arm around Neil’s waist, and he hugged her back, glaring the reporters down.

“I turned Lulu down because I am in a relationship, as you so clearly shoved in my face a moment ago,” Neil said. “Lulu is a wonderful woman, and an incredibly talented player, and if someone did turn her down for the reasons Harmony is saying then I will be first in line to knock their heads of their shoulders.”

“I’ll be next,” Dante said.

“Me third,” Oscar agreed.

“I only just met this girl, but I’ll throw hands too,” Carter piped up.

“Girls stand together, I got her back too. Can’t let the boys have all the fun,” Robin said, smiling over at Lulu.

“Look, I can’t fight, but I stand with Lulu too,” Jaiden said awkwardly from Oscar’s side. Lulu had on an incredibly big smile and she looked at the reporters with challenge in her eyes. They took the cue and moved on.

“Oscar Milton, is this your boyfriend?” The third reporter asked. Oscar’s lips thinned and he used his arm to not-so-subtly push Jaiden behind him a little bit. Oscar being bisexual and in a same sex relationship was not a secret, but Neil had found out after that very first press conference that he wanted to protect Jaiden from the vultures that were reporters. Jaiden’s name was kept out of everything Oscar did or said to reporters and online, and even though his face was flashed around in pictures he posted or were snapped by the press when out together, he had never confirmed or denied Jaiden’s identity. Jaiden’s past was a tumultuous and rocky one and Oscar didn’t want his boyfriend’s name dragged through the mud because of it. What was new was Dante also stepping in front of Jaiden to hide him from the cameras, his own lips thin.

“Thanks for your time,” Dante snapped. Neil smiled and used his arm around Lulu and grip on Robin’s hand to turn his girls around and head towards the VIP entrance. Lulu started laughing as soon as they were out of earshot.

“Fuck, I hate her so much,” Lulu cried.

“Who? Harmony?” Neil asked. Lulu nodded her head, letting go of him.

“Yep, that snake. Thanks for defending me though. All of you,” she said to the group. Carter opened the door and held it open to let Robin, Neil and Lulu in, followed by Oscar and Dante with Jaiden between them, the Fox staff behind them.

“Anytime,” Neil said.

“Me as well,” Jaiden said, putting his arms around Dante’s waist in a hug which made Dante blush. Oscar kissed the top of Jaiden’s head.

“She’s your problem next year, not mine,” Neil teased. Dante, Oscar and Lulu groaned comically. Jaiden let go of Dante, only to put one hand in Dante’s and the other in Oscar’s. That was even newer than the defending thing. Neil had asked Dante if he was gay one night when he’d seen Dante staring at a picture of a male model in a magazine. Dante had sighed and shook his head, saying _Answer is pending, watch this space_ _._ A few months later he’d quizzed Neil on asexuality before deciding that was how he identified. He’d said he just wanted companionship without the sex stuff, but thought kisses were nice. Oscar and Jaiden had already floated the idea that Dante move in with the two of them going into next season seeing as though Neil was moving across the country, but it looked to Neil that the idea might have already been agreed on.

“Neil, are you going to introduce us?” Wymack interrupted Neil’s curious train of thought.

“Sure. Wymack, Abby, Betsy, meet Oscar, Jaiden, Dante and Lulu,” he said. “You know these two,” he gestured at the Fox’s nearby.

“Unfortunately, I do,” Wymack agreed. Dante let go of Jaiden’s hand to shake hands with the Fox staff and he didn’t make a move to take it back when the introductions had passed so Neil pushed the thoughts away. The security guard who manned the VIP lobby came forward then to give everyone a cursory check and just before sending them to the elevator that would take them to the private seating rooms upstairs, the door opened behind them and Jackson walked in looking bewildered.

“Hey Jacks,” Neil said, catching his eye. He looked relieved to see a familiar face.

“Thank God,” he said. “I have never been in here before and I am literally terrified.”

“You’re fine,” Neil said, “just let this guy do his thing and we’ll go up.” The security guard stepped forward and checked Jackson over and finally the entourage made it to the elevator and up into the private box where the others were waiting.

“Neil!” Allison said, jumping gracefully to her feet and balancing over to him in her tall shoes. She kissed his scarred cheeks and hugged him tightly while everyone else spread out to mingle.

“Hey Ally,” he choked. She released him and ruffled his hair with an affectionate grin.

“Have you seen everyone calling Andrew your girlfriend?” She asked excitedly, looking too gleeful at the misunderstanding.

“If Andrew doesn’t get a haircut after this then I have no idea if he ever will,” Neil said. “How can a picture of us kissing be circulating at the same time the rivalry rumours are still going? It’s been nearly two years, Ally,” he said.

“You could always just set them straight,” she said. “No pun intended.”

“What pun?” Jeremy asked, coming into the room with Jean and Thea.

“Hey Jere,” Neil said.

“Setting the media straight about his relationship with Andrew,” Allison answered. “Get it?”

“So original,” Jean replied sarcastically. Neil smirked and nodded his agreement with the sarcasm. Jeremy guided Jean away after that, before a cat fight between him and Allison could start. For the most part, Jean and Allison could be civil and get along, but sometimes they got catty with each other. Jean’s defensive and abrasive nature could clash with Allison’s antagonistic personality.

“Neil! Is Andrew here yet?” Will asked from nearby, grinning excitedly. For a kid who didn’t like Exy, he was pretty stoked to be at the Championships. Heather stood beside him, her own happy little smile on her face.

“He’s here, he’s in the locker room, I hope. Otherwise he has some explaining to do,” Neil told him.

“Hey, Neil!” Oscar yelled across the room. Neil sighed at being in such high demand and looked over and found him standing with Jaiden and Oscar at the table with finger food. He was waving his phone around at Neil, so he excused himself from Allison and went over to him.

“What?”

“McKenna and Carly just got here, that’s everyone?” He said.

“Yeah, I think so,” Neil agreed. He heard the door snick shut and turned towards it, wondering how they got through security and up to the room so fast. His mouth fell open when he saw Nicky and Erik standing inside the door.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Aaron asked loudly from where he was at the big glass front of the box overlooking the stadium.

“Hello to you, too,” Nicky said.

“Is this what you call a surprise romantic getaway?” Neil called over to them. Nicky laughed and Erik waved in greeting from behind him.

“A surprise yes, but definitely not romantic,” Erik answered. Allison took the duty of taking Nicky and Erik around and introducing them to those they didn’t know and Neil realised she’d been the one to help organise their arrival as she handed Nicky his orange band for being a Fox. Neil watched as Nicky hugged Abby and Wymack shook his hand, and even though Neil couldn’t hear them, judging by the way Nicky reacted, Wymack had told him he was proud. Neil drifted a little closer in time for Wymack and Erik to shake hands. They’d met once before, at Nicky’s graduation, but they hadn’t been married then.

“Welcome to the family,” Wymack said gruffly, letting go of Erik’s hand. Nicky made a pathetic noise and hugged Wymack. Neil could understand that all Nicky had ever wanted was for his relationship to be accepted and supported by his family and that it would never happen, but Wymack giving him this was the next best thing. Neil turned away with a small smile and sank into the couch next to Lulu. She had a glass of soda in her hand and was watching Wymack interact with Nicky and Erik with undisguised curiosity.

“All teams are supposed to be close, I get it, but the Foxes take it that one step further. It’s like you’re a family,” she said.

“Yeah, I guess we are,” he agreed. “It didn’t used to be like this though,” he added. Robin came over to join the conversation then and perched on Neil’s legs.

“He’s told me stories about how fractured the team was when he joined,” she said. “Every new group of freshmen that comes in refractures the team for a while, but we work it out.”

“You kind of realise that the only people who will ever have your back without a doubt is that team, that they’re the only people who will understand where you come from,” Neil added. He jumped when Aaron poked him in the back of the head, coming over to share his opinion.

“Neil stuck his nose in where it didn’t belong,” Aaron said. “I’ll never thank him, but in the end, it did help build some bridges in the team.”

“We still don’t like each other,” Neil said, looking up at Aaron where he stood, “but we’re Foxes so we have each other’s back, no matter how many years out we are.”

“Helps that you’re dating my brother,” Aaron muttered.

“That too,” Neil agreed.

“You done?” Nicky asked, causing Neil to realise Wymack, Abby, Betsy, Erik and Nicky had stopped their conversation to listen.

“We’re done,” Neil agreed.

“I was just admiring the Fox dynamic,” Lulu explained. Abby smiled and gave Nicky another hug, radiating pride.

“You’ve all gone soft since graduating,” Wymack snapped. Lulu looked mildly put out but all the Foxes past and present in the room rolled their eyes and went back to their conversations.

“Hey, they’re going on for drills,” Jeremy said, getting up from his chair to stand at the huge glass wall to watch. Neil went and followed him, standing next to him to watch Andrew track across the court to the goal. He would only be playing the second half this year because the starting goalie wasn’t injured, but Neil was buzzing with excitement to watch him shut down the goal.

“Next year, you and me at finals,” Neil said, turning towards Jeremy. The tall blonde grinned and raised his hand for a high five that Neil obliged.

“You keep the Lions in check, I knock the Tornadoes out,” he agreed.

“Court too?” Neil asked. Jeremy’s grin was characteristic and broad.

“Tryouts next season, you bet your ass Jean and I will be there,” he said. Neil grinned back.

 _“Quoi?”_ Jean asked, coming to join them.

 _“Nationale essais,”_ Neil answered.

“Oh yeah, Court tryouts,” Jean agreed, switching to English for his boyfriend’s benefit.

“Just don’t fuck with Kevin if you play on the same team,” Neil told Jean. The reason they hadn’t taken Jean in as a Fox and sent him to the Trojans and Jeremy was because there was too much history between the backliner and the striker for them to ever be on the same team. By the time they played for the national team it would have been about seven years since Jean was rescued by Renee from the Nest, hopefully they could make it work.

“We’ll make it work,” Jean said, smiling a tiny little bit.

“Good to see some things will never change,” Renee said, startling Neil. He looked over at his friend at his shoulder before following her gaze out the window to where Andrew was trudging down the court to Kevin, apparently after Andrew had rebounded a ball off his helmet at the other end of the court. Kevin was gesticulating in annoyance as he spoke to Andrew, but Andrew just poked him in the stomach under his armour with the butt of his racquet and took the ball back.

“They’re going to get carded before the game starts,” Jeremy noted.

“There’ll be a Minyard Day Rivalry rumour soon enough,” Jean added, but Kevin and Andrew clacked sticks as they went back to their drills, a friendly enough end to their altercation.

“Or not,” Neil said with a grin. Neil pushed away from the glass to sit back down with Robin while the teams warmed up and did their drills.

*

When Kevin and Andrew both walked out for second half, they met in the middle of the Court with one glove off and their helmets in their hands and faced the balcony. Neil, Allison, Renee, Nicky, Aaron, Robin and Carter went outside and put their hands in the air to show their orange bands, Andrew and Kevin raising their own hands down on the court with their matching ones.   
The chorus of ‘What Does the Fox Say’ by Ylvis started playing over the speakers in the stadium, something Allison had organised with the Lion’s Den technicians during the week. Nicky started singing along, dancing with his hand in the air still, the audience in the stands going feral with laughter and cheering, rallying the song back at the Foxes in the stadium and the on the court. Last year, this stand had been powerful, a moment of solidarity, standing as a family and saying ‘fuck you’ to those who had shunned them and mistreated them. This year, it was lighter, it was still a show of support and family, but it was showing everyone that they were okay and that the team of misfits had found their place in the world.   
Wymack, Abby and Betsy came out as the cheering died down and both Kevin and Andrew stood a little straighter, lifted their heads a little higher. They both waved the hands that they held aloft, Kevin at his parents and Andrew at Betsy who radiated with maternal joy and pride. When the audience realised who the adults were, or at the very least who Wymack was, they started cheering again, but the captains on the court sent Andrew and Kevin on their way to their starting positions. Neil’s mouth hurt from smiling so wide and when Robin pulled him in for a hug, he returned it with full force. Allison and Renee kissed, and Carter jumped around with his excessive energy until Wymack put his hand on top of his head and grounded him, making the others laugh.

“How come Andrew waved for Betsy, but not me? I was a surprise too!” Nicky complained. The Tornadoes’ dealer served, but Neil tore his eyes away from the game to shoot Nicky a look.

“I may have not put two and two together with the hotel background in the call, but Andrew most likely did,” Neil told him. Nicky sighed and shook his head.

“Such a smart fucking asshole,” he muttered. “He knew we were coming today.”

“Probably,” he said, turning his attention back to the game.

*

Neil knocked on the player entrance of the Lion’s Den after fighting against the crowds of people leaving the stadium singing the Tornadoes’ song in triumph. The Lions had lost by one point, but Andrew had made a gallant effort to close the goal in his half. However, without the strikers scoring at the other end, he couldn’t have done much else to help. Most of the people Neil had watched the game with were already splitting off to join the after party or were waiting for Neil and Andrew on the sidewalk nearby. Jackson had taken Heather and Will home, with promises from Andrew’s sister to meet them for lunch on Sunday.   
“Neil!” Olivia said, opening the door for him. She was still in court gear, but she’d been on press duty so that wasn’t surprising, and she pulled him into the lounge room.

“Hey Livia, good game!” He told her. She beamed with pride and ruffled his hair fondly.

“Thank you, shorty,” she said. “I’m going to shower, but this is your locker room now too so get comfy.” She didn’t wait long enough for a response, just flounced away down the hall to the women’s changeroom. The only other female on the Lions’ line up was sitting cross-legged on the sofa drying her hot pink hair with a yellow towel, and three male teammates were gathered in the lounge too, sending Neil strange looks.

“So, it’s true, you’ll be joining our team next season?” One of the men, Calum, said. At least, Neil assumed it was Calum judging by the port-wine birthmark on his cheek that Neil recognised from headshots he’d studied.

“Yeah, I’ll be signing the contract in a couple of weeks,” he said. Josh, Calum’s cousin, sent his teammate a pointed look and Captain Rossen slapped him across the back of the head.

“Fuck of cap’,” Josh snapped.

“Look, we like Andrew well enough… at least we’re used to him after two years. Please don’t start shit with him on our court man,” Calum said.

“You know better than us what he’s like when he snaps too, we haven’t seen it and we don’t want to,” Josh added. Neil felt his lips stretch in a slow smile and he shook his head at the two of them. He opened his mouth to tell them that he wasn’t going to be a problem, but Andrew spoke up as he came in from down the hall.

“He hasn’t seen me snap either,” he said. Neil whirled to him and tilted his head.

“You nearly broke Allison’s neck like five years ago,” he reminded him. Andrew waved that off as inconsequential.

“Yet she still thinks my freckles are cute,” he said. “That’s beside the point. I _nearly_ broke her neck. I didn’t actually break it. See also: I didn’t snap.”

“Whatever,” Neil replied, turning towards the trio of men. Rossen was smiling in amusement, but Josh and Calum looked concerned as they flicked their gazes between the two of them. “I’ll annoy him, and he’ll threaten to kill me, but rest assured we will make it through the year in one piece,” he promised them.

“So fucking annoying,” Andrew agreed.

“Anyway,” Rossen said pointedly. “Neil this is Calum, Josh and Jane, and Coach Miles is down the hall. You will get used to everyone else as time goes on. Let me be the first to say welcome.”

“Thanks Alex,” Neil said, and he nodded a greeting at Jane where she was quietly sitting, watching the exchange. She lowered her towel from her damp hair and looked at him curiously.

“Who was the blonde person you were making out with on Andrew’s balcony?”

“Nice to mee you, too,” Neil said with a laugh. “Did you know about that by the way?” He asked, turning to Andrew who came further into the room and raised his eyebrow.

“That you were making out with a girl on my balcony?” He asked.

“No, that there were pictures circulating online,” he said.

“Yeah, I saw some stuff on Twitter,” he said. Neil shook his head at him, deciding to talk about that later, and turned back to Jane.

“It doesn’t matter,” he told Jane. She narrowed her eyes, but didn’t ask again, which was probably for the best.

“Fiona will wheedle it out of him for NDAs and contract stuff,” Calum said dismissively. Andrew snorted.

“Unlikely,” he said. “She still doesn’t know who I’m dating.”

“You’re dating someone?” Calum gaped. Andrew rolled his eyes and didn’t say anything. More players were trickling down the hall and they shot Neil wary looks as they came into the lounge, but Olivia gave him a grin and situated herself on the other side of Andrew.

“Who is dating someone?” A guy asked, leaning on the back of Jade’s couch.

“Andrew, apparently,” Calum answered.

“Okay team!” Miles called, coming into the room to address the Lions for the end of the season. “Oh Josten, you’re here. Welcome to the team kiddo, when can you come in and sign your contract?” He asked, catching sight of him. The Lions cheered for their new team member, even though they sent dubious looks between him and Andrew.

“I’m heading back to Portland on Tuesday, but I’ll be back in Chicago within two weeks so any time after that,” Neil answered, feeling awkward at being addressed at a professional capacity while in the semi-informal, post-game loss environment.

“Cool, we’ll have someone in touch with you shortly. If you need a couch to crash on while you get your feet under you in Chicago speak now and we can organise something among us,” he said.

“No, I’m fine,” he promised.

“Great,” Coach Miles said. “Alright team, so I say go forth and conquer the night, lick your wounds, do whatever you need to do tonight and tomorrow. We will reconvene here Monday morning to go over the game and talk about our loss.”

“We did our best team, the fact that we made it back for a second year is phenomenal,” Rossen said, doing his part to try and hype up his wilted team.

“We’ll be back next year Lions, and with the Spitfire on our team we will take it all the way to win!” Miles said, causing a few more cheers from his team. Neil shrank a little smaller.

“No pressure,” he muttered. Without even looking at him, Andrew flicked Neil’s earlobe. “Hey, fuck you!” Neil hissed, swatting at him.

“Leave the rivalry at the door you two,” Miles warned them. Neil felt like a student being scolded and reflexively shrank smaller to not be noticed, an instinct from when he went through schools whilst on the run. Andrew made a dismissive, almost crude hand gesture at his coach and Neil saw his jaw tighten, which was probably Andrew’s own instinctive reaction to being scolded like he would have been in classrooms.

“Yes, Coach,” Neil said quietly. Andrew flicked Neil again the minute the coach’s attention went elsewhere.

“Kiss ass,” Andrew murmured.

“Alright, you’re all dismissed. Get drunk or do whatever but be in shape for pre-season starting in a month!” Miles told his team who dispersed into smaller groups, making plans and deciding where to go for the rest of the night.

“You two heading to the Tornadoes’ afterparty again this year?” Olivia asked.

“Most of our friends have already headed there,” Neil answered, but when he glanced at Andrew, he knew they wouldn’t be joining them. Andrew was looking at his hands, not giving any sign of interest about heading to the championship party, and he was angled towards the door like the only thing keeping him tethered to the room was Neil and Olivia themselves. “Would you be able to take Lulu, Oscar, Dante and Jaiden to the party? I think we’re going to get a late dinner with our old coach,” he told Olivia. She smiled, and nodded in understanding, gently touching Andrew’s shoulder and squeezing.

“And your old psych?” She guessed. Andrew nodded his head once. “I can absolutely take them, but I’ll need a car,” she said.

“Take mine,” Neil said, tossing his keys to her, knowing Andrew would rather they ride in the Maserati. “Oscar can drive, he’s the only one out of you five who doesn’t drink.”

“You got it, Spitfire,” Olivia said with a teasing tone. Neil rolled his eyes and stepped aside, gesturing for them to lead the way out of the stadium.   
Outside, Olivia was introduced to the Fox staff before shepherding the Scorpions to Neil’s car and leaving the five on the sidewalk.

“Hey Andrew,” Betsy said fondly and Andrew let her give him a tight, one-armed hug. She guided him a little away from the group to talk, grinning at him like a proud mom. Neil watched them go before turning his attention to Wymack and Abby.

“Did you guys want to get a late dinner?” Neil asked them. Abby’s smile was soft and surprised, and she nodded her head at him, hands clasped under her chin, radiating pride.

“Can I come?” Kevin asked, coming around the building with wet hair and supremely arrogant swagger.

“Don’t you have a party to get to?” Wymack asked him, but when Kevin slung an arm over his shoulders he smiled at his son.

“I can get there later, dinner with my dad and stepmom sounds like a good thing first,” he said.

“Your brother, too,” Neil muttered.

“And Andrew and Bee,” Abby said, gesturing at the pair. Neil followed the move and saw Andrew smile up at his surrogate mother and she laughed at whatever he’d said, squeezing his arms before pulling him in for a hug that he returned.

“Sounds like a party to me,” Kevin laughed before calling over. “Andrew?”

“Ready already,” Andrew echoed back, Betsy following him back to the group. “Who are you riding with?” He asked Neil.

“Wymack, Abby and Kevin,” Neil said. “You two can catch up,” he inclined his head at Betsy. Andrew nodded his agreement, and the touch of his knuckles to Neil’s hand was appreciative.

“Where should we go?” Kevin asked. “You know the city better than any of us.”

“Because I’ve lived in it for over two years,” Andrew snapped. “Just follow my car,” he added. Wymack agreed and shooed Kevin towards his car, and Abby put her arm over Neil’s shoulder and guided him after them.

At dinner, Neil sat between Kevin and Andrew, across from the three older adults in the booth. It was a small family owned Italian restaurant that had a gelateria attached to it that Andrew frequented so much they had a picture of him on their wall as a celebrity visitor. Andrew liked the ice cream so much he’d let them take the picture, and he sometimes sat in the corner with two of the younger kids in the family and helped them with their English homework while he ate ice cream. Neil didn’t understand why kids liked Andrew, he was blank and cold, but he supposed it had something to do with his blanket honesty and the impressive amount of patience he had for kids.   
“Andrew, Neil, nice to see you again,” the female owner and matriarch of the restaurant greeted them, bringing her order pad with her.

“Rosie,” Andrew said, then flicked his gaze at Neil in silent request he do the introductions.

“Wymack, Abby, Dr. Dobson and Kevin, this is Rosie,” he said obediently. “Andrew eats ice cream here like every day.”

“I didn’t hear that,” Kevin muttered, but he was in too high spirits to sound too disheartened by Andrew’s sweet tooth.

“We had your game on out the back, you played really well Andrew,” Rosie complimented, tapping the yellow flower she had in her hair, which Neil now realised was specifically chosen to support the Lions.

“Thank you,” Andrew said. “Kevin played on the winning team,” he added, not looking up from his menu. Neil hid his amused smile in his glass of water.

“Yes, but Kevin hasn’t helped my daughter get a B in English or bought my son books for Christmas twice,” she said fondly. Andrew didn’t react, but Betsy smiled at him anyway. Wymack, Kevin and Abby stared at him as if they couldn’t believe that was true.

“We’ll be ready to order in a few minutes,” Neil told Rosie. She grinned and walked away, leaving them to make their choices. Neil and Andrew would both get what they normally did so Andrew stopped pretending to read his menu and started fidgeting with it instead.

“Do you really buy her kids presents?” Kevin asked after a moment.

“Yes,” Andrew replied.

“That’s very kind of you Andrew,” Betsy said. Andrew didn’t acknowledge that, just reached for Neil’s glass of water and busied himself by drinking from it. The others took that as their cue to leave it alone, so they did, instead catching up on their lives. It was mostly Kevin talking, babbling on with adrenaline from his win, and the older three engaging him. Neil was content to watch, marvelling at how they didn’t actually talk about the game much other than a few exchanges between Kevin and Wymack.

While everyone ate dessert, Andrew pressed a little closer to Neil, so he put his arm around the blonde’s shoulders and pressed his cold lips to the top of his head.   
“Did you hear I have a girlfriend I make out with on balconies?” He murmured quietly. Andrew looked at him out of the corner of his eye, seeming to consider putting ice cream on Neil’s face in annoyance. Lucky for Neil, he decided against it, although Neil knew that was more likely because he wanted all of his ice cream and didn’t want to waste any on Neil.

“They might be calling me your girlfriend, but they’re calling you a bottom,” he muttered back. Neil felt a flush of embarrassment and resisted the urge to reach for his phone.

“What, why?” He whispered.

“Because of the way you were sitting on me,” Andrew replied, all nonchalant as if this didn’t amuse him at least a little bit. In the picture Neil had seen he was sitting high on Andrew’s thighs with his knees at his hips, Andrew’s hands hidden under his shirt where he was touching his torso. It didn’t scream ‘bottom’ or ‘submissive’ at him, but what did he really know about any of that outside his dynamics with Andrew? Also, he was literally on top of Andrew, why didn’t that make him the top?

“But I’m not just a…” Neil trailed off to make sure they weren’t being overheard, but it wasn’t like he needed to finish the sentence anyway.

“No,” Andrew agreed, resting his head on Neil’s shoulder for a moment. “I think I need to get a haircut,” he said quietly.

“And next time we kiss on the balcony, you can sit on my legs,” Neil added, smirking into Andrew’s hair.

“Yeah right,” Andrew scoffed. Neil moved to put his hand in Andrew’s hair and tangled his fingers in it, realising he’d miss it if Andrew cut it as short as he’d had it when they’d met.

“You don’t have to cut your hair either, not if you don’t want to,” he added, tugging lightly.

“I know,” Andrew said. “I wasn’t going to.”

“Hey, you two, you ready to go?” Wymack asked, getting Neil and Andrew’s attention.

“We just need the bill,” Neil answered, taking his arm away from Andrew and putting his spoon back in his mostly empty bowl.

“Already covered,” Kevin said, waving his hand to ward off any and all protestations. “Who’s giving me a ride to the party?”

“I’ll take you,” Wymack said.

“We’ll take Bee and Abby back to your hotel,” Andrew added.

*

When they got back to the empty apartment, Neil sank to the couch and pulled Andrew down on top of him. He took Andrew’s weight like a blanket and wrapped his arms around his back while Andrew tucked his face against Neil’s neck and closed his eyes. Neil could feel Andrew’s eyelashes against his skin and his breath fanned along his collarbones, but they lay in silence for a while just sharing their space. Neil could tell Andrew was exhausted from his game and from dinner and he was content to hold onto him, feeling their twin heartbeats and listening to the night sounds below them of a Saturday night in Chicago. They hadn’t turned on any lights when they came in, just opened the balcony curtains to let in the streetlights from the city that was their home.   
“You’re my champion,” Neil said into the silence, turning his face to press a kiss to Andrew’s cheek.

“I hate you,” Andrew replied. Neil smiled and kissed his cheek again, more so just asking for his attention this time.

“No, you don’t,” he said. “I mean it. I know you didn’t win, but I still think you’re a champion.”

“You suck,” Andrew moaned dramatically. Neil opened his mouth to deny that too, but Andrew decided he didn’t want to hear it and kissed him. Neil smiled smugly against his mouth and slid his hands into his hair, prepared to spend the rest of the night celebrating with Andrew just on their own. He may have lost the finals again, but Neil was beyond proud of him for making it there a second year, and God, watching Andrew lockdown the goals was one of the hottest things he could do. Neil had been quietly waiting for this all night, not that he would say that aloud. It didn’t matter, Andrew kissed him like he already knew.


	27. "Not Velvet and not Leather."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No, it is not kinky like the title suggests!   
> THEY ARE GOING FURNITURE SHOPPING AND MOVING IN TOGETHER GUYS IT'S HAPENNING!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of abuse my guys <3 
> 
> Thank you all for reading!!   
> I have two more chapters after this that are beta read and finished, and one chapter nearly finished to be sent to my beta.   
> Then there might be a little delay between updates as I try to write the chapters and get them back from my beta reader in a timely fashion. Keep in mind we are averaging on like 4-6k words a chapter (sometimes more) and that takes a good couple of hours. I also have my last two assignments of the semester due, and starting next week I will be working two jobs.   
> Again, this is not a cancellation of the fic, I am writing as much as I can every day, just might be every couple of days more so than every day.   
> Thank you for understanding <3

Neil pulled into the driveway of his new house as the removalists pulled out. He climbed out of his car, pressed the beeper to close the garage behind him and watched the truck drive down the street. Andrew was standing on the top step in front of their front door, but he was watching Neil and not the truck. They’d chosen a house instead of an apartment after six, seven in Andrew’s case, years sharing a floor and walls with strangers on the other side of them. They’d found a house in a nice area of mostly younger adults, a fifteen-minute drive from the Court and a short walk to the lake and the local court Kevin and Neil had found two months ago before the championship game. They’d owned the house for a month now, it hadn’t taken them long to find one they liked, but it had taken that long for it to be repainted and recarpeted and have the gardens fixed up. They were still regularly denying Olivia’s use of her interior decorator because neither of them liked the décor in her place. They were going to decorate the house themselves, once they’d worked out how to do that. Neil hadn’t ever owned anything other than fairy lights just because they looked good in the room, and Andrew’s idea of decoration was books on every surface, but they’d figure it out. They’d already chosen carpets and paint colours with ease, although Neil hadn’t actually been inside since they’d made those decisions so he couldn’t tell you if they’d made good choices or not.   
“Are you coming up?” Andrew asked. Neil realised the van had disappeared down the street and he turned his gaze up to Andrew. He climbed up the four steps and brushed his lips against Andrew’s cheek, smiling when his boyfriend pushed into closer.

“I see you didn’t kill the removalists,” Neil commented. Andrew made an unimpressed noise and looked the way the van had gone. They were planning to supervise the moving of their boxes together, but Neil had been called in to sign his contract and left Andrew to do it. He’d not been worried per se, but he’d been a little interested to see if Andrew reached his limit before he got back.

“It was a near thing,” Andrew said turning back to face him.

“Sure it was.” Neil said sarcastically with a smirk before opening their front door, knowing he was about to walk into their home, and he was going to stay. Their first night of forever. His heart lurched into his throat as he walked in. It smelt a little like paint and it looked homely with their warm coloured walls and the soft carpets. It wasn’t an overly big house; a master bedroom upstairs with attached bathroom and walk in wardrobe, a second bedroom and a small study. Downstairs was a third bedroom, a second bathroom and a spacious open plan kitchen, dining, living space. In the basement was their laundry, but Andrew had had to haul Neil up out of there on the first inspection before a full-blown panic attack took hold of his system. Ever since the Nest and his father’s attack in the basement during his freshman year, Neil had struggled in small spaces underground. Andrew had just waved that away and said he’d do their laundry. They didn’t own a lot of things, having lived in Olivia’s fully furnished apartment before now and without lugging any of Neil’s shared furniture from Portland. Neil knew that upstairs in their room their boxes of clothes would be there, and so would the bed from Andrew’s room, matching bedside tables, and dresser. On the kitchen counter was their single box of kitchen things, in the living space was two beanbags and the box of gaming things and DVDs Andrew owned. Their books were down there as well, but other than that, they didn’t have anything. They couldn’t fill their home yet. But it was their home. Here. Nowhere else to go, nowhere to run, and no real reason to. Andrew closed the door behind them, and Neil vaguely recognised that he crossed the short gap to where Neil was standing frozen on the tiles of their entryway. Everywhere Neil had lived since he was eight was temporary. Even though he’d spent five years at Palmetto State, he’d always known his dorm was a temporary place. He had a room at Wymack and Abby’s, and a key to the Columbia house, but they weren’t the same as standing in the entry to a house he co-owned. A house he owned with the man he would live here with, share a bed with, eat dinner with and drink coffee with, every day. The man he loved and would continue to love until he died. This was it. This was his home from now until the end. His fingers were shaking, and his chest was aching, and he couldn’t move further into the house.

“Get it together, runaway,” Andrew said, voice gentler than Neil would have expected. Neil felt Andrew’s hand on the back of his neck, a heavy, familiar weight.

“Not a runaway,” Neil said through deep breaths.

“Always a runaway,” Andrew said. Neil shook his head and turned to face him, Andrew’s hand remaining on his neck. He put his fingers in Andrew’s hair and pulled their bodies flush, kissing him deeply.

“No, Drew. Not anymore,” he said against his mouth. Andrew moved his hands to Neil’s hips and kissed him again. When he pulled back, he dug his thumb into his lip as if the taste of Neil’s words was still there.

“Welcome home, baby,” he said, lip lifting in a small smile. The smile that only Neil ever got to see.

“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else, handsome,” Neil replied, taking Andrew’s hand and tugging him deeper into the house.

“We need to go furniture shopping tomorrow,” Andrew said, standing in the middle of their barren living room. Neil was halfway up the stairs to their room, but he paused and peered down over the bannister.

“Okay, training finishes at eleven, we can go straight to… um a furniture shop?” Neil said. Andrew rolled his eyes at Neil’s complete naivety of where to buy furniture, but he nodded his agreement anyway.

“We’re having pizza dinner!” Andrew called after him in a voice the brooked no argument. Neil smiled to himself and followed the wall to the master bedroom. Andrew had already put the bedframe together and taken the plastic mattress protector off, but the bed was unmade, and their pillows didn’t have pillowcases on them. Their boxes and bags of clothes and things were pushed to the sides of the room and out of the way. He dropped his backpack on top of the bed and walked through the door into their bathroom. Soap, face wash and shampoo were in the shower already, and Neil didn’t miss the candle near the bath that Andrew wouldn’t admit to putting there, even though, no one else could have. In a porcelain cup on the sink were two toothbrushes and Neil didn’t know why that made him smile, but warmth unfurled behind his ribs and stayed there after he’d closed the door behind him. He crossed the room to a stack of boxes with his named marked on the side with a Sharpie. The top one was the smallest and he opened it with a pair of scissors Andrew had left atop the dresser. Inside were his oldest belongings, the one that had travelled with him to Millport, to Palmetto, to Portland and now to Chicago. The worn, threadbare, washed out clothes that had stayed by his side and kept him invisible when he’d needed them to, helped him stay alive. His binder was in there too, the one a near enough shrine to Kevin to hide his underworld belongings. Andrew had discarded of the contacts year ago, throwing them out with an irritated curl of his lips and Neil had watched him do it without protest. Uncle Stewart’s number was also programmed into his phone now, although his uncle tended to only call him from payphones and burners anyway. All of the money that he’d had easy access to was gone on the Maserati in the garage or just on living through college before his pro wage, and he had no intention of going back for the rest that he and his mom had hidden around the world. He didn’t really have any use for the binder now, but as he put his fingers to the frayed, torn cover, he couldn’t bring himself to dispose of it. He put the box on the floor, took out the binder and went to his bedside table, leaving the binder in the bottom drawer. When he rose and turned back to the room and his box, Andrew was standing in the doorway leaning against the frame, arms crossed and bored expression on his face.   
“The first thing you put away in the new house and it’s that?” He asked. Neil shrugged with one shoulder and knelt in front of his box again, looking over and up at Andrew.

“The toothbrushes were already out,” he said. He wasn’t sure where the words came from, or why having his toothbrush next to Andrew’s in their house meant as much as it did to him, but it did. Looking at Andrew, Neil saw the weight of his words settle on him. Andrew nodded once in understanding and came into the room, grabbed one of his own boxes and put it on the floor in front of Neil’s. They knelt in front of each other, two boxes between them and started sorting out their belongings.

They worked quietly, unpacking all their boxes of clothes, and storing them in the wardrobe and dresser. Neil started taking the boxes apart while Andrew ordered pizza and when Andrew came back upstairs with the phone, Neil was standing on top of a pile of flat cardboard, six or seven inches taller than he normally was. Andrew looked up at him, unimpressed by the increased height difference and pushed Neil backwards off the unsteady stack. Neil yelled out, his heart lurched and he flailed, catching onto Andrew’s hand and yanking him after him, causing Andrew to trip on the pile and they landed heavily on the carpet, Neil’s elbow hot with pain. He moaned and Andrew took steadying breaths, eyes wide with alarm.   
“Fuck me,” Neil groaned, touching his elbow and prodding it. It was sore, but it didn’t feel injured and it had full mobility.

“Really? Right now, on top of the cardboard?” Andrew replied snidely. Neil huffed and proffered his sore elbow at him in accusation.

“You did not think that one through,” he muttered. Andrew, who seemed to have regained his composure, nodded his head.

“No, it would appear I did not,” he agreed. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” Neil answered. He grinned at Andrew who looked wary at the action. “Remember all the times I said I’d pull you with me if you pushed me off the roof?” He asked. Andrew rolled his eyes in response, but the corner of his mouth lifted. “Well, I was right.”

“Pizza will be here in half an hour,” Andrew muttered, clambering to his feet. He helped Neil up after him and Neil checked his elbow again, found it wasn’t the end of his career, and picked up half the stack of boxes.

“Should we put these in the basement?”

“No, I will,” Andrew said, holding his arms out for them. Neil smiled sheepishly, remembering his near panic attack the first time, and handed them over. It took Andrew two trips and while he was gone, Neil emptied his backpack. He put his drink bottle and book on the bedside table, his deodorant in the bathroom, and hung the bag on one of the wardrobe handles.   
When Andrew returned, he was holding a set of sheets, pillowcases, and the comforter which he seemed to have found in one of the boxes downstairs. He threw the pillowcases at Neil who sat on the floor to put them on distractedly, mostly interested in watching Andrew struggle with the fitted sheet. He laughed when Andrew went to the second corner and the first one popped again. Obviously, this wasn’t Andrew’s first time making a bed, but it was an effort every time for the short man to do so and Neil didn’t mind watching. He’d offered to help in the past, but Andrew had glared at him until he sat back down. Sitting down to put pillowcases on was a little awkward in and of itself, but Andrew wouldn’t make the bed unless Neil was sitting down out of the way.

“Drew, it’s my bed too now, just let me help,” Neil said. Andrew glanced at him, face impassive other than the slight pull at his eyebrows that said he was annoyed. Neil waited.

“Fine,” he said eventually. Neil got to his feet and took one of the corners on his side of the bed, wedging it over the corner. Andrew did the same on his side and the sheet stayed where it had been put. They did the other corners and just like that, it was done. Andrew didn’t say anything, but Neil hadn’t expected him to, they just threw their pillows onto the mattress, straightened out the comforter, and they had a bed to sleep in. Neil bellyflopped onto it, reached for Andrew and yanked him down too, grinning at him as he moved to lie beside Neil.

“What do we need to buy tomorrow?” Neil asked.

“Everything,” Andrew replied simply, entwining their hands together on the mattress between them.

“No, like specifically tomorrow, what do we need?” Neil pressed, rolling his eyes at Andrew’s non-answer. Andrew seemed to consider this for a moment before he pulled Neil closer and kissed his nose.

“Household things like cleaning stuff, toilet paper, dishtowels, normal towels, maybe a mop, that kind of stuff,” he said. Neil had been so concerned about the big things, he hadn’t even thought of the small things like that.

“We don’t have toilet paper?” He asked. Andrew smiled; it was small, but it was fond, and Neil smiled back.

“I took some from Olivia’s house, but we should buy more.”

“We need a couch,” Neil pointed out. Andrew hummed in quiet agreement.

“Yeah and an armchair, and an entertainment unit, a TV perhaps, a coffee table, hall table near the door, a mirror for in here wouldn’t go astray. A coffee machine is required, and a fridge, microwave, washing machine, pots, pans, knives….”

“Okay, okay, I get it,” Neil said with a laugh. Andrew smiled again and pulled Neil in for a kiss. Neil felt more laughter bubble up and he giggled against Andrew’s lips. Andrew bit his lip in quiet admonishment, but when he pulled away, Neil could see that he was happy. “We need everything, you were right.”

“We just have to agree on the everything,” Andrew said. Neil nodded his head, rolling onto his back and then up on his elbow that wasn’t sore. The room was fairly barren, but Neil kind of liked the idea of keeping their bedroom plain.

“I think we should turn the study room into a library, for all of your books,” he said. “You can hang pictures of authors or whatever in there.” He looked down at Andrew who looked a little startled.

“What?”

“Well, it doesn’t have to be a library,” Neil amended, feeling a little self-conscious about speaking without thinking it through. “Just a room that you can have to retreat to when you need to. The third bedroom we agreed to turn into a gym, the second bedroom a spare room for guests, but we never talked about the study. I don’t need it, like at all. I know you’re used to sharing a room, especially with me by now because of Palmetto, but if you wanted a room you could just have as your own, to go to when you needed to, then that one is free,” he explained. Andrew didn’t react for a minute, maybe two, just stared at Neil with a blank look on his face and just when Neil was about to take it back, Andrew pulled him down against him and kissed him deeply.

“Thank you,” Andrew murmured against his mouth. Neil wondered if he was blushing.

“No problem,” he said, pulling back to look down at him. “So, a good idea then?”

“Yes,” Andrew agreed, smiling again. “I will probably just put the beanbags in there and fill it with books, but yeah, it’s a good idea.”

“I don’t want you to feel like you have to hide all the things you like in there though, we can buy a bookshelf for the living room too,” Neil said quickly. Andrew shook his head and put his hand in Neil’s hair, touching his cheek with his thumb. Neil could read his thoughts on his face as clearly as if he’d said them, but Neil didn’t know what to do with that amount of wonder. Andrew was clearly wondering what he’d done to deserve Neil, but Neil didn’t know what to do or say about that, so he kissed his cheek and lay down beside him again.

“We can make big decisions like that tomorrow,” Andrew said. “I was thinking we could frame some of your better pictures for the walls in the hallways though, if you want?” He added. The fact that Andrew had been thinking of ways to make this place a home for Neil, while he’d been thinking about ways to do the same for Andrew, wasn’t lost on him. Judging by the soft look on Andrew’s face, it wasn’t lost on him either.

“Yeah, I’d like that,” he agreed.

“Good thing we’re pro athletes then. Filling an entire house in one day is not going to be cheap,” Andrew mused, sounding genuinely intrigued by this fact. Neil had given a lot of his money to the Moriyama family last season, and he had paid for half of this house, but even still, he had more money than he knew what to do with. The sheer amount of sponsorship money he received last season was enough without his actual wage on top of that, and even though Andrew was paying off Aaron’s medical bills, he had even more money than Neil did. Neither of them was entirely comfortable with how much money they had, and even though Andrew did know how to spend money, he wasn’t exactly used to living lavishly. The fact that they were going shopping tomorrow and knowing they would be dropping an obscene amount of money on furniture was mind boggling to Neil. What added to this, was the fact that even after they’d done it, they would _still have money_ blew his mind. They could fill their house, after just buying it, and still not worry. He didn’t know what to do with this knowledge and made a mental note to donate money to some actual charities- not just the facades the Moriyama family used- later that week when they had internet.   
“Come on, let’s go downstairs. Food will be here soon and we’re going to have to eat on the beanbags,” Andrew said. Neil rolled off the bed and followed Andrew back down the stairs into the kitchen, just as the front door bell rang. Andrew went ahead to pick up the pizzas while Neil scrunched down in the dark blue beanbag. He heard the delivery driver getting excited that it was Andrew who had opened the door, and Neil was surprised when he heard Andrew assent to being in a selfie with the kid, before the door was shut and locked and he reappeared with two boxes of pizza.

“You took a selfie,” Neil commented. Andrew ignored that, rightfully so, and handed Neil his Hawaiian pizza with a disgusted look on his face that Neil in turn ignored. Neil didn’t like capsicum or olives which Andrew had on his pizza, so he was fine not sharing his own pineapple covered one.

*

"These aren't made for two," Neil said as Andrew tried, not gracefully, to climb onto his lap where he sat on the beanbag. As inelegant as it was, Andrew managed to get comfortable, nearly toppling them- again- in the process and Neil laughed. He put his arm Andrew's waist and the other on his thigh where he was sitting sideways on Neil's legs. Andrew had been reading in his beanbag and Neil had been watching Exy highlight videos on YouTube. His favourites were compilations of the Foxes that fans made, especially the ones of Andrew and Kevin, although Matt's and Nicky's were always sweet and funny, and Robin had a few of her as well. "Did you want something?" He asked Andrew, propping his chin on Andrew's shoulder and peering up at his profile.

"I want nothing," Andrew said calmly. Neil smiled and made a tutting noise.

"Well, I'm apparently worth something now so I should probably head out..." he teased, making as if he was about to get up.

"You're not funny," Andrew deadpanned, digging his fingers into Neil's shoulders in an attempt to keep him seated.

"I'm a little bit funny," Neil argued.

"I want to go to bed," Andrew said. Neil knew there was an invitation there, a promise, and Neil was keen to chase that promise to their bed, but he wasn't done being annoying yet.

"Do you want to go to sleep, or go to bed?" Neil asked, putting one hand in Andrew's hair. He smiled as he curled his fingers in the long blonde locks and pulled. Andrew made an unimpressed noise, but he didn't pull away or say no, and when Neil tugged again, Andrew half closed his eyes and went with it.

"What's the difference?" He asked, regarding Neil's question.

"The difference is, if you're going to sleep, I'll stay down here so my videos don't wake you. If you're just going to bed then I'll come with you," Neil answered. He pulled a third time, this time guiding Andrew's head and exposing his neck. He pressed a gentle kiss to Andrew's pulse point and felt Andrew shiver in his arms. Neil smiled before brushing his teeth down Andrew's neck and followed it back up with his tongue. He felt Andrew dissolving, going boneless against him and heard his breathing hitch when Neil bit down on his skin. Neil felt the familiar tug of desire spreading in his stomach and he hummed with satisfaction, pulling away from Andrew to look at him.

"Looks like you're not sleeping," he said, smirking at Andrew as he opened his eyes. Andrew made a noise in his throat, a soft growl of either approval or frustration, and got up off Neil's lap, pulling his partner up after him. Somehow they managed to check that all the doors were locked and to switch off the lights before Andrew ran up the stairs in a poorly disguised wish for them to continue as soon as possible. Neil laughed and followed his boyfriend to their bedroom. Andrew was toeing out of his socks when Neil closed the door behind him. Neil felt Andrew's sweater hit him in the back of the head and he caught it with a laugh before it could fall to the ground. He turned to face Andrew, grinning and shaking his head.

"Look, I get it, I know what you want, you don't need to be dramatic about it," Neil teased, throwing the sweater back at where Andrew was standing half naked at the foot of their bed. Andrew scowled, threw the sweater on the floor and started crossing the room towards him. Neil smiled and backed himself against the door before Andrew could do it for him. Andrew pressed into Neil’s space, lining their bodies and their mouths in one smooth move. As demanding and near enough desperate Andrew had been to get to this point, his kiss was anything but. Neil sighed softly and relaxed into the gentle, loving kiss, Andrew’s hand supporting the back of Neil’s head and his other hand at the small of his back. Neil tilted his head to kiss him a little harder and put his hands on either side of Andrew’s face. _Home. Home. Home._ Neil’s heart was beating in time to the word circling through his mind and when Andrew pulled away to tug Neil forward, Neil went easily. He lay on the bed and put his hands in Andrew’s hair as his boyfriend followed him down, wrapping his legs around Andrew’s waist to keep him close. Andrew’s weight was comforting and familiar, his mouth soft and warm against Neil’s. He untangled his fingers from Andrew’s hair and held onto his strong, broad shoulders.   
“Yes or no?” Neil asked, needing permission to go past his shoulders in a position like this.

“Yes.” Andrew bit the word into Neil’s jaw as he started trailing kisses away from his mouth. Neil dug his fingers and blunt nails into the firm muscles and scratched down Andrew’s back to the top of his sweatpants. Andrew bit down harder on Neil’s neck as he tried to control his reactions, but Neil knew how much he liked it and smiled as he arched his body under Andrew. In that moment, Neil couldn’t understand why they had waited so long to get a place of their own.

*

“Oi, Spitfire!” Calum yelled as Neil entered the loungeroom after practice. He seemed to have gotten over his initial wariness of Neil throughout this last month of pre-season training. It probably helped that while training, Neil and Andrew barely interacted outside of doing what they were supposed to be doing. Neil still couldn’t score on Andrew, and as infuriating as it was, it was at least familiar, and a routine Neil knew. They often arrived and left in the same car, but they were always either the first or last to leave and it went unnoticed. Neil wasn’t sure how long that would last, but it was a little amusing that they went so under the radar.

“What?” Neil said, one hand in his hair trying to undo a tangle in the back.

“When are you going to tell us who your girlfriend is?” He asked, jumping over the back of the couch and landing in front of Neil with a shit-eating grin. Neil rolled his eyes and gave up on the tangle in his hair.

“I don’t have one,” Neil said. It had been his answer all month when his team probed about the balcony picture. They’d asked Andrew about his relationship bombshell too but gave up on that when Andrew punched Josh in the face after he grabbed Andrew’s arm in an attempt to stop him walking away.

“Your hair is a mess,” Andrew said, coming into the lounge behind Neil.

“It’s looked worse,” Neil replied offhandedly, not looking back at him. He heard Andrew jangle his keys, a subtle move that told Neil he was ready to go. “I don’t have a girlfriend, I mean it,” Neil told Calum.

“Did she dump yo’ ass?” He teased. Neil smiled, the sharp tug of his mouth telling him it was somewhat cruel and amused.

“I’ve never been dumped,” he promised.

“Savage, Josten!” Calum cheered, holding his hand up for a high five. Neil rolled his eyes and met his hand in the air with a loud slap.

“You’re ridiculous,” Andrew dismissed. Neil turned his head and watched Andrew walk across the lounge and out the team’s door to their parking lot.

“He hates you so much,” Calum said, bringing Neil’s attention back.

“Yeah, so he says,” Neil mused, turning back to face the tall brunet.

“What did you do?” Calum asked, his voice genuinely curious, maybe even concerned for the first time and not just trying to tease Neil or get under his skin.

“He says he’s hated me since he laid eyes on me, I don’t know what to tell you man. It’s just how it is,” Neil answered with a one-armed shrug. “I’m going to head off, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah, sure, see you,” Calum agreed. Neil turned on his heel and left the stadium to find Andrew in the idling Maserati on the curb.

“Your hair really is a mess,” Andrew said when Neil closed the door. “My comb is in my sport’s bag,” he added, jerking his thumb in the direction of the backseat. Neil didn’t really care if his hair was messy, but he reached around for the bag and dug around until he found it as Andrew left the lot. When he straightened, he clicked his seatbelt on and untangled his wet curls, watching out of the window as Andrew drove them towards the furniture and whitegoods store. Neil personally didn’t have any plans about which stores they were supposed to be going to, he hadn’t lived here long enough, and he had never bought furniture in his life. He did know that the shopping strip Andrew was taking them too had an Excites store and he was hoping, borderline praying, that he’d be allowed to go in there at some point that afternoon.

“Where are we going first?” Neil asked, tossing the brush onto the backseat and digging around in his own bag for his phone and wallet as Andrew parked. Andrew didn’t say anything, so Neil sat up and put his belongings in his pocket and waited.

“Furniture store, there’s three on this block, then fridges and shit,” Andrew said, sounding unenthused, although Neil decided he was probably as curious about this endeavour as Neil was. Neil took a deep breath and puffed his cheeks, making a face at Andrew’s profile, which the blonde must have seen in his peripheral because he turned his head. Neil wiped the look off his face and schooled his features, but he couldn’t stop the smile pinching at the corner of his mouth. He was kind of excited to be doing this with Andrew, to be buying stuff for their new house, but he also had no idea what it was that they were actually supposed to be doing.  
“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?” Neil asked, trying for innocence, trying to play down how excited he was starting to get. Andrew lifted his hand and put his palm over Neil’s mouth.

“You smile like that when you know something that no one else does. Saw it too many times during your debates with Kevin,” he said. Neil kissed Andrew’s palm and he yanked it back like it had hurt him. Neil smirked, feeling satisfied.

“I’m just… interested to see how this goes. Shall we?” Neil replied. Andrew let out a loud breath through flared nostrils.

“I guess we have no choice, we don’t have a fridge,” he said. Neil grinned and climbed out of the Maserati. Neil waited on the sidewalk for Andrew, but when Andrew paused to frown down at his phone, Neil turned to face the block of stores Andrew had brought them too. Neil didn’t know what to call it other than a place for ‘big things’, like washing machines, TVs, furniture, and things like that. He could see further down some signs for special interest and hobby type stores, like the Excites and a music store, and was that a place you could buy horse riding stuff? Neil blinked, but the signs were too far away to be clear, so he turned back to Andrew where he was still standing next to the car.

“What are you looking at?” Neil called over, stepping down from the curb towards him. Andrew tilted Neil the phone screen, an unamused look on his face. Neil couldn’t see it from where he was with the sunlight bouncing off the backlit screen, so he raised his eyebrows and waited.

“They keep you calling you ‘sweetheart’ and ‘precious’ and ‘baby’,” Andrew said. “The fans and reporters and stuff. It’s getting tedious.” He clicked his phone off and put it in his pocket.

“You and the Foxes called me ‘baby’ at the kitten interview, can you blame them?” Neil reminded him, refusing to bring up the picture of them kissing that had made everyone call him the submissive one in their relationship because he was still feeling a little pissed off at the assumption and invasion of privacy. Whether Andrew knew what Neil was thinking or if he was just annoyed at the way the ‘baby’ comment at the interview had been taken out of context, he scowled at Neil and who shrugged it off with one shoulder.

“It was amusing then, but it appears they have forgotten who you are now and have reduced you to ‘the sweetheart of Exy’, it’s disgusting.”

“Are you saying I’m not a sweetheart?” Neil asked, feigning offence. Andrew didn’t deign to react, just stared him down, until Neil started to smile.

“You’ve killed people,” Andrew deadpanned. The words kind of stung, but he wouldn’t feel guilty for the bullets he’d fired during desperate attempts to flee and save his own life. Besides, the people he’d shot at might still be alive. Granted, it was unlikely, but not impossible.

“Allegedly,” Neil said. “And you have too,” he added. Andrew rolled his eyes.

“One person. Singular. And you don’t see fans calling me an angel,” he shot back. Neil could feel the cruel, cutting, Wesninski smile pulling at his mouth. Andrew nodded once, as if that smile was proving his point, and he brushed past Neil towards the first store, tugging Neil’s Fox sweatshirt to drag him after him. “Smile like that next time there’s a camera in your face and we’ll see how long it takes for them to start calling you ‘monster’.”

“Shut up, Drew,” Neil groaned, but he let Andrew pull him into the nearest soft furnishings store. Apparently, first stop was for couches and armchairs.

It was more difficult than Neil had expected. Andrew had memorised the measurements of the spaces so they could fit the furniture to the rooms, but there was so much more to it than just space. Colours, comfort, style, height, fabrics, they were all different and apparently important. They didn’t have plain white walls or grey carpets, which meant they had to actually take into consideration the colours of the furniture, and neither of them were exactly tall so they didn’t want furniture they had to climb onto. However, it was the fabric of the upholstery that was proving to be the hardest for them to agree on. Neil didn't want a leather or vinyl couch because you stick to them when you're sweaty, and you slip and slide all over them in general. The first few Neil liked the look of, Andrew wouldn't even touch let alone sit on.

"We're off to a good start," Neil mused, sinking onto a lush red velvet couch that had two matching recliner chairs. "We've been looking for twenty minutes, and you haven't sat on a single couch. Just, try this one? It's really soft," he pressed, running his palm over the crushed velvet upholstery. Andrew eyed the couch warily before shooting Neil a look that very clearly said 'this is your fault' before putting his hand on the back of it. Neil barely had time to react before Andrew was recoiling as if the fabric had burnt him. Neil watched him curl his hand and shake it angrily as he stalked off, teeth gritted so hard Neil had heard it. Neil leapt over the back of the couch, ignoring the look the shop attendant sent him, and followed Andrew out of the store, feeling concerned and a little guilty. Neil found Andrew leaning against the wall a little way down the sidewalk, still shaking his head out and a fiercely unhappy look on his face. Neil reached out for his hand, wanting to see what was wrong with it, but Andrew pulled it back and curled it into a fist, cutting his gaze to Neil.

"I'll punch you," he said. It wasn't a threat so much as it was a warning. Something about the crushed velvet upholstery had overwhelmed Andrew and triggered this adverse reaction and touching him was a sure way to make it worse and give Neil a broken nose. He backed up and put four feet of space between them, which was also conveniently out of Andrew's reach. He waited for Andrew to soothe himself and eventually the tension seeped from his body and he looked back at Neil, face still blank.

"Not velvet and not leather," Neil said. Andrew nodded once and crossed his arms in front of him. Neil took two steps closer, enough space between them not to touch, but he felt it was safe enough to encroach on his space. "How about you go choose the couches and armchairs and whatever, I'll go back in and choose the coffee table and stupid hall table to put near the door thing. We'll meet for lunch in an hour, then we can shop for TV, laundry and kitchen shit," Neil suggested. He was already tired of trying to decide on where he was supposed to be sitting in the new house and was ready and willing to give the decision making to Andrew. The blonde seemed to consider that for a moment before he nodded his head and let his arms drop to his sides.

"Lunch at fifteen past one, the cafe on the corner," he said bluntly. Neil nodded his agreement and Andrew spun on his heel and stalked down the street to a second store.

*

Neil hadn't expected it to actually take the full hour to choose, he'd thought he'd go in and find the two pieces of furniture and then be able to spend half an hour in Excites. As it was, he'd ended up choosing the entertainment unit because it came in a set with the coffee table and entry hall table, and he was nearly late to the cafe. Neil couldn't see Andrew when he walked in, but he knew if his boyfriend was there, he'd be wedged into one of the high-backed booths in the corner, so he headed in that direction. He found Andrew exactly where he’d expected him to be and the blonde lifted his head when Neil slid into place across from him.   
“Hey, handsome,” Neil said with a grin. He was tired from training and the hour and a half of looking at furniture, but he couldn’t help smiling at seeing him again. How he’d survived two years with states between them he didn’t know.

“Hey, baby,” Andrew replied. Neil frowned at him, concern tugging at his stomach. Andrew called him baby often enough that the nickname in and of itself wasn’t what caused concern, it was the fact that they were in public and Andrew himself had a carefully constructed blank mask on his features.

“What’s wrong?” Neil asked, leaning across the table with his hand outstretched. Something must have really been bothering him because Andrew put his head down, cheek on Neil’s palm, and closed his eyes. Neil’s frown deepened and he put his other hand in Andrew’s hair and massaged his scalp, waiting for Andrew to talk. It took a couple of minutes, but Andrew sat up again and put his hand in Neil’s instead, fishing his phone out of his pocket.

“A fan saw us outside the furniture shop,” he said quietly. Neil’s heart leapt into his throat. He knew there was always the possibility that they would get caught together in private moment and outed to the word, in fact it was a miracle that it hadn’t happened yet. The picture of them kissing was a close call, the only reason hardly anyone had worked out the truth was because you couldn’t see Andrew’s face in it. They were holding hands on top of a table in a public café, there was always a chance, Neil just hadn’t ever considered what he would do if or when it happened.

“Okay, so that saves us telling everyone directly,” Neil said slowly. He was about to ask why Andrew was so put out by the update, but his boyfriend shook his head and squeezed Neil’s fingers tighter.

“No. Me telling you I was going to punch you. Someone took a picture when I had my fist raised and you stepping away from me. They posted it to Twitter quoting me. It’s going viral.” Neil didn’t understand why Andrew looked bummed out. Well, to the untrained eye, he wouldn’t like any different to usual, but Neil could see it in the heavy stare and the grip of his hand.

“So what? People already think we hate each other, why would them thinking you were threatening me be any worse?” Neil pressed, tugging Andrew’s hand until Andrew met his gaze.

“I’ve never hit you,” Andrew said seriously. Neil had to think about it for a moment, but Andrew was right, he’d never hit Neil if you didn’t count the initial racquet-to-the-stomach in Millport before they’d been officially introduced.

“True, but you’ve come close,” Neil said with a small smile. Andrew tugged his hand firmly, subtly telling him he isn’t paying attention to the point.

“I haven’t hit you. People now think I do,” Andrew pressed. Neil felt understanding smack him in the face. Andrew, the man who didn’t care what people thought of him, was uncomfortable with people thinking he physically abused Neil even if their relationship wasn’t public knowledge.

“Why does it matter what people think?” Neil asked. Andrew’s nose twitched as he stared him down. It was simple, but it told Neil his questione had gotten under his skin. It doesn’t matter to Andrew what people think of him, not usually. He was used to being bad mouthed and talked about behind his back, and for so many years his own opinion of himself was so low he didn’t feel the need to defend himself against lies and slander. In more recent years, Neil had seen Andrew care more about himself, value himself a little more, and he was a little proud to see that Andrew had drawn a line in the lies and hateful speculation that he wouldn’t tolerate.

“It doesn’t matter…” Andrew trailed off, jaw working. “I’m not…”

“You aren’t abusive,” Neil said quietly.

“No,” Andrew agreed. “Am I?” The question was whispered, and Andrew’s voice cracked audibly. Neil’s stomach swallowed his heart and he moved faster than he thought he could, sliding out of his seat and directly next to him. He put his arms around Andrew’s waist and pressed a hard kiss to his boyfriend’s mouth, trying to absorb Andrew’s self-doubt and fear. Andrew let himself go pliant under Neil’s mouth and kissed him back.

“You aren’t abusive, Andrew,” Neil murmured against his lips. He pulled back and put his hands on either side of his face and kissed his nose quickly before looking into his face. “You aren’t abusive, I mean it. You aren’t like _them,”_ Neil said firmly. He meant everyone who had ever hurt Andrew, hurt the people he had lived with growing up, hurt Aaron and Nicky and the people he cared about. Neil could still see the doubt flickering behind his hazel eyes, so Neil kissed him again and pressed their foreheads together, closing his own.   
“Andrew, you are good. You care, you protect, you are loyal. You give your life for those you love. You. Are. Good. I know it,” he said quietly. “I know it.”

“I…” Andrew sighed, pressing his forehead a little harder to Neil’s and when he spoke again, it was barely audible as he put his hands over Neil’s still on his cheeks. “I love you.”

“I know, Drew,” Neil replied, just as quietly, heat flooding his veins at the words. “I love you too.”

“I won’t hit you,” Andrew said, pulling away. Neil smiled at him and settled back in the booth, content to get comfortable on Andrew’s side of the table because he had no intention of moving from his side soon.

“I know that too. And if I’d crossed your boundary by touching you before, you’d have had every right to defend yourself, Drew, I’m not mad that you warned me.” Neil assured him. It was why they worked as well as they did. Neil understood and respected his boundaries, listened to ‘no’ and paid attention enough to know when Andrew’s buttons could be pushed. “Should we order?” Neil asked, putting his hand on the plastic-coated menu. Andrew opened his mouth to answer, but his phone started ringing in his pocket and he pulled it out to glare at it. Fiona’s ID blinked back at them.

“What?” Andrew snapped, putting the phone on the table, turning on speakerphone. Neil glanced around, but there wasn’t anyone close enough to eavesdrop.

“Don’t snap at me Andrew Joseph Minyard, I am mad at you first!” Fiona said back, and she really did sound mad. Neil turned back to look at the phone with raised eyebrows. Andrew flicked Neil a bored look and put his chin on his palm, leaning on the table.

“Is that so?” Andrew deadpanned.

“Why did you have to go and threaten Josten the day before we were announcing him joining the line-up? Now I have to damage control this outbreak of drama and then announce on schedule. We told you both, cut the rivalry out for a bit, and I am sick to death of you ignoring me. Why were you even at a furniture store together? If you see Josten in public, walk the other way okay? Give me a break for one more week, please God, I need you to pull your head in for a week. Then punch him in the face. Do you understand me?” she ranted, and Neil could imagine her waving her hands around. Andrew put his head on Neil’s shoulder for a long moment, clearly trying to regain some control before he snapped back at her.   
“Andrew? Do you hear me?”

“Yes Fiona,” Andrew replied. “No more threats in public for a week.”

“Yes. Now, why the fuck were you two even together?”

“Buying a couch,” Andrew deadpanned. Neil smiled and pressed a silent kiss to the top of Andrew’s head before his boyfriend sat back up again.

“That doesn’t even make sense,” Fiona groaned. “Whatever, I need to call Josten and read him the riot act too,” she said with a long-suffering sigh. Andrew looked at Neil and waved his hand in a ‘go on’ gesture.

“No worries Fiona, I heard you loud and clear,” Neil said. The spluttering followed by a long silence made both Andrew and Neil smile and Neil intertwined their fingers.

“What are you doing together? Is there blood? Do I need to prepare statements for injuries?” She asked, clearly starting to panic. Andrew rubbed his forehead as if warding off a headache. Neil was mildly alarmed by her fear and felt his eyes widen of their own volition.

“No, Fiona, it’s fine. We’re just taking a break from furniture shopping. No harm, no foul,” Neil promised her.

“Andrew was serious about couch shopping?” She hedged.

“Yeah,” Neil confirmed. “All we have is beanbags.”

“’We’?” She asked. Andrew rested his head back against the booth and Neil squeezed his hand as they waited for the penny to drop. “Oh. My. God. Did you guys move in together?” She demanded.

“We did,” Neil confirmed.

“Andrew, when you and Olivia told me you were moving out of her house, I assumed you were moving in with your girlfriend!” She cried. “You told me you’ve been together for like, over five years now? And Neil, don’t you have a girlfriend here, too? The blonde you were caught kissing? I had to do so much damage control, you are both going to turn me grey!”

“Is she serious?” Neil whispered. Andrew just stared at the phone with wide eyes and his mouth slightly parted.

“Fiona, for someone who has a child with an ex-wife, you are spewing a very heteronormative rhetoric,” Andrew observed. Neil liked when he spoke with that unassuming authority and intelligence and quietly turned Andrew to face him and kissed his lips quickly. Andrew kissed him back, but he pushed Neil’s face away when they parted.

“Heteronorm… holy fucking shit,” Fiona said. “What… why? You guys hate each other.”

“It is a rumour that got out of control,” Andrew explained.

“We didn’t expect it to go on this long,” Neil admitted. “But we also don’t want to make a big deal about correcting everyone either.”

“So, no Twitter campaigns or coming out parties,” Fiona said.

“Nothing, Fiona. Just leave it,” Neil said, keeping an eye on Andrew who nodded his head.

“Okay, um… sure. I won’t tell anyone; I legally can’t share information about you without permission thanks to the contracts your lawyer wrote up. Wow, you guys have the same lawyer, I really should have worked this out before.”

“Technically, Aaron Minyard has the same lawyer too and I’m not dating him so…” Neil pointed out. Andrew looked unimpressed by his input.

“I am going to process this and solve the current drama, enjoy your break and no more threats!” Fiona said.

“Bye Fi,” Andrew said, hanging up before Neil could respond.

“I guess that’s the first step to telling the world,” Neil mused. Andrew rolled his eyes and picked up his menu.

“I’m hungry,” he said. Neil smiled and looked down at his own menu, his stomach growling its agreement.


	28. "What The Fuck Is That?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is just a soft filler chapter that made me smile when I thought about it so I wanted to write it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's short :( <3

Andrew woke up in his familiar bed in a less familiar room, with Neil draped over him as if they’d fallen asleep on a single mattress. It was unusual for Neil to move in his sleep, especially without waking Andrew up, but here they were. Andrew was just relieved that it was contentment that filled his body with warmth and not panic at waking up to a man’s weight on his body. Neil had one leg between Andrew’s and the other splayed out across the unbelievable amount of space on his side of the mattress, and his arms were tucked into his sides, his chest on top of Andrew’s and his face pressed into Andrew’s neck. They were both unclothed, but with Neil’s unbelievable body heat Andrew wasn’t feeling any kind of morning chill. He pulled the covers up over Neil’s back anyway, just in case he did, and it woke him up. Andrew buried one hand in Neil’s tangled curls and pressed a gentle, quiet kiss to the top of his head and closed his eyes. He wasn’t going to be able to go back to sleep, but he would stay there as long as he could, just holding Neil in his arms while he slept, their hearts matching beat for beat. In another hour or so the various delivery drivers from the separate stores would be arriving with their furniture from yesterday. Andrew had ordered some of his, and Neil’s, favourite pictures that his boyfriend had taken over the years to be printed on canvases. They would be arriving in a week and Andrew was hoping he could hang them on the wall in the living room before Neil knew what he was doing. Their gardens were low maintenance, but with their games across the country and the potential of joining the national team this coming season, they would be hiring a gardener to come once a month and look after the lawns. Despite this, Andrew wanted to buy some houseplants for their living space and his study room. He liked the ones Renee had at her house. He couldn’t explain it, but it made the spaces feel more alive, more lived in.

Andrew wasn’t entirely sure how long he lay there with Neil sleeping deeply in his arms, but the chirping of his alarm warned them that the first of the deliveries would be arriving in half an hour, and Neil stirred at the noise.   
“Babe, no,” Neil moaned, voice muffled as he pressed his face closer to Andrew’s neck. They didn’t have training until that evening, so Neil had already slept in more than he would normally get, so Andrew had no sympathy for his tiredness.

“Go in the shower,” Andrew said.

“Need coffee,” Neil mumbled, putting his arms around Andrew, holding on tight.

“Then go and get some.”

“No coffee,” Neil grumped. That was true, they’d bought a coffee machine yesterday, but they didn’t have any coffee because they hadn’t gone food shopping yet.

“Shit out of luck then,” Andrew said, digging a finger into Neil’s ribs until his boyfriend whined and rolled off him, holding the sore spot and flashing a poisonous glare. Andrew’s smile was small, but he couldn’t have tried to hide it if he wanted to. Neil looked adorably rumpled, and as vicious as Neil could be, Andrew wasn’t put out by the glare. “Getting up? I need to see how bad your interior design decision making is,” he said. After lunch they’d been able to choose the rest of their furniture and appliances together, but he had no idea what Neil had chosen for their coffee table and entertainment unit.

“I chose fine,” Neil muttered, rolling over and curling into a ball. Andrew was starting to feel a little concerned, Neil was usually a lot more pleasant when he woke up, a little more full of life.

“Hey,” Andrew said, rolling to his side and putting his hand on Neil’s bare shoulder. When Neil didn’t shrug him off or roll away, he moved a little closer to line his front along his back and put his arm around his waist. “Are you alright?”

“What?” Neil asked. “Oh, yeah handsome, I just don’t want to get up,” Neil answered, rolling over to face him. Andrew searched his eyes for the truth and found he meant it.

“Why not?” Andrew asked, running his fingers up Neil’s back. Neil’s eyes fluttered closed and he melted under Andrew’s touch.

“It’s warm and comfortable in here, I don’t want to leave,” Neil said, but his voice was a little rougher than it had been before. For someone who woke up every morning wanting to go for a run or head to training, or just move, this was new. Andrew kissed Neil’s forehead and felt his boyfriend press closer against him, seeking warmth and affection.

“We can’t stay here long, the deliveries will start arriving soon,” he reminded Neil, but at that very moment, Andrew didn’t really care how long they stayed there.

“Ten more minutes,” Neil said. Andrew hid his smile in Neil’s curls and pulled him back onto his chest as he rolled onto his back. Neil went willingly and buried his face against Andrew’s neck again, kissing the sensitive skin beneath his ear.

“Cut it out,” Andrew scolded him as a shiver went down his spine. He felt Neil’s smile, but he didn’t kiss him again.

Neil followed his self-imposed ten-minute time limit and was the first to move away when the time came. Andrew listened to him bitch and moan through their shower about having no coffee, and before he could start complaining about being hungry, Andrew got dressed, kissed his cheek, and left the house.   
When he returned, four men were lowering a couch out of a truck in his driveway and Neil was leaning in the doorway of the house watching. He had clothes on now, so it was an improvement- or not- compared to when had Andrew left. Neil perked up when Andrew pulled in and was waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs when Andrew closed the garage behind him and went around the front of the house.   
“Here, asshole,” he said, handing Neil a bag of bagels and a coffee. Andrew’s own caramel frappe was half drunk from the drive.

“I remember why I moved in with you now,” Neil teased before taking a mouthful of his drink. Andrew rolled his eyes, which only furthered the blue-eyed man’s satisfied grin.

“Are you Mr. Minyard?” One of the men at the truck asked. Andrew looked over and raised an eyebrow at them.

“Dude, that’s _the Andrew Minyard,_ do you live under a rock?” Another hissed, elbowing his colleague.

“I don’t know what that means, we just need him to sign the papers,” the first one said. Neil made a noise that could have been amusement or encouragement and went up the stairs back into the house to in the kitchen. Andrew went towards the men in the truck to sign their papers and then followed Neil into the kitchen. Neil had cream in the corner of his mouth and Andrew was torn between sneering at him for it or kissing it away. He didn’t get a chance to make the choice, Neil wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and took another bite, leaving Andrew staring at his mouth which was not what he wanted to be doing.

“Staring,” Neil said, grinning around his mouthful of food. Andrew blinked to bring himself back and reached into the paper bag for one of the bagels.

“Where did you want this?” He was close enough this time for Andrew to read his name tag and Andrew gestured for Antonio to head in the direction of the lounge space past the empty dining room. Andrew left Neil in the kitchen with his bagels and coffee and followed the delivery men with the couch. It was two parts, but when pushed together it made an ‘L’ shape with a long part you could lie on and three individual places to sit. It was a soft fabric without being velvety and fluffy, and it was a dark red- almost black. There was a matching recliner armchair as well, and other than the chair he’d bought for the upstairs study, that was all from Andrew’s solo adventure.

“What the fuck is that?” Neil asked, coming to stand next to Andrew to watch the men walk the chair up the stairs. They were taking it up in pieces because it was too big to carry up the stairs assembled. It was a big, round chair that was suspended by chains from a curved frame. Andrew could stretch out, curl up, share with Neil, or swing gently on it, and once they’d settled in, he was going to buy a couple of pillows and blankets for it. He was quite content with the purchase and he gave Neil a small smile when he answered.

“It’s a chair.”

“It’s a swing,” Neil corrected.

“Kind of,” Andrew allowed.

“For your study?” Neil guessed. Andrew smiled a little more and nodded his head. When Neil had offered the room to Andrew, to give him his own space, Andrew had been filled to the brim with love. He’d felt loved and understood in return, warm to the core. He didn’t really understand how he’d gotten to this point in his life. A home, a long-term relationship based on mutual trust and (eventually) honesty, genuine relationships with his family that just kept growing, and friends. Speaking of the family that kept growing, Neil pulled his phone out of his pocket to open a message and judging by the now familiar expression of love and fear, Dan or Matt had sent him a picture of their daughter. None of the First Foxes had been able to make it to Columbus to meet baby Holly, but Neil and Andrew were going next weekend. It was good timing, her birth, because Matt had the entire six months of Class 1 to stay home with his wife and daughter, but he sent Neil pictures of her ten times a day. In turn, Neil was terrified of the weekend to come, but Andrew was kind of looking forward to it. Andrew was also curious to see who Matt and Dan listed as Holly’s godparents. They weren’t religious, but Andrew suspected that they would still task someone with the responsibility of looking after Holly should the worst happen. He knew it would probably be one of Dan’s stage sisters, but it could also be Renee and Allison, or potentially even Kevin and Thea. Whoever it was, Andrew hoped they took the job seriously if they did have to take Holly in, Andrew knew first-hand what it felt like to be taken in by people who didn’t actually want you.

“What’s she doing?” Andrew asked. Neil titled the phone to show Andrew. Holly was in the white onesie with orange fox paws on it that Andrew had sent. He’d sent it in Neil’s name because he couldn’t quite stomach the idea of Dan and Matt knowing how much he actually did care.

“Apparently, I sent them that?” Neil said with a hum.

“As far as they’re concerned, you did,” Andrew said, matter of fact. Neil’s lips pinched as he tried to ward off his grin. Andrew didn’t like the squishy feeling in his stomach when Neil looked at him like that; all proud and amused and knowing. He put his palm on Neil’s face and pushed his gaze elsewhere as the men started coming back down the stairs. Neil laughed and swatted his arm away.

“Does it really say ‘Family’ on the back instead of a surname?” Neil asked.

“Yes, with a number zero on it because she isn’t one yet,” Andrew explained.

“Ridiculous,” Neil said with a grin. “Cute, but ridiculous.”

“They like it,” Andrew pointed out, gesturing at the phone.

“That’s all from us, mate,” one of the delivery men said, speaking for the first time. His accent was foreign. British, Andrew decided.

“No worries, thanks for sorting that all out,” Neil answered in his own flawless British accent. Andrew had to work to stop his mouth from dropping open. He’d heard Neil’s British accent before, of course, usually when he was on the phone to his uncle Stuart, sometimes when he was deliberately trying to rile Andrew up, and occasionally when he was drunk. Still, it took him by surprise every time and it always, without fail, made Andrew want to get down on his knees and he hated that.

“Hey! That was great, are you from the motherland?” The delivery man asked. Andrew rolled his eyes and he appreciated that Neil herded them out of the house. Andrew went into their new living space where the boxes of books and the beanbags had been pushed against the walls. At some point today they would be getting an armchair for their bedroom, a washer and a dryer for the laundry, a fridge, Neil’s chosen furniture, a TV, and for his study they were getting three large bookcases. Andrew would probably only be able to fill one with the books he owned now, but he knew he would be able to fill all of them soon enough. The shelves were going to take up one wall, the hanging chair would go next to the window, and when Neil had pointed out a small table to ‘put a kettle on with a fridge underneath,’ Andrew had very seriously considered proposing. Everything he would need to feel safe and comfortable would be in that room when he needed it. Neil had made a point to tell Andrew that he didn’t need to contain everything to one room because this was his home too, but Andrew liked the idea of having a place he could retreat too. Besides, it wasn’t a secret that he was possessive, having important things in one room made him feel good, which was a feeling he liked to hold onto when he got the opportunity. The only thing he particularly wanted that he wouldn’t keep in that room was a punching bag or weights which would be in the downstairs bedroom they’d had fitted out with linoleum flooring and mirrors for a gym. Their spare gear and Exy equipment were already stored in the wardrobe down there, but they hadn’t yet bought a treadmill or the boxing and weights equipment. It was on their list of things to buy, like couch cushions and blankets and houseplants and pictures. Granted, Neil would still run outside, and Andrew would still go to the gym to spar with Jackson, but having the means to do things important to them inside their home was a new opportunity they were both keen to take full advantage of.

“What’re you doing?” Neil asked as Andrew grabbed a box of books.

“I am going to take these upstairs and out of the way, they will be easier to unpack later then too,” Andrew answered. Neil came closer and snatched up the beanbags, one in each hand.

“Cool, let’s do it. You can tell me more about the things I have sent to Holly,” he said. So, Andrew did. He’d sent a toy lion that was bigger than Holly herself, pyjama onesies in pastel rainbow colours, the Fox jersey onesie she was apparently wearing, and an orange pacifier with a fox paw on the plastic part. He’d also put in a box of chocolates for Matt and Dan and sealed it up with a congratulations card. He doubted they would know the handwriting wasn’t Neil’s.   
“That is… ridiculously thoughtful and kind,” Neil said as they dumped the last boxes in the study. Andrew felt a defensive guard go up at his words, and Neil must have sensed the change in him because he turned around to face him properly and tilted his head in question. He didn’t come closer or touch Andrew, he just waited for him to let his guard back down.

“Yes,” Andrew allowed after a minute. “It is kind.”

“It is, and it’s a good thing. I wouldn’t have thought to send anything,” Neil said. Andrew sighed at his boyfriend’s obliviousness and nodded his head because obviously Neil wouldn’t think to send a present. Neil stepped into Andrew’s space, testing his boundaries for the moment, but Andrew wasn’t feeling defensive now, he could see that Neil wasn’t judging or disrespecting him. He nodded his head when Neil’s hand hovered over the side of Andrew’s face and Neil slid his fingers in Andrew’s hair.   
“You’re a good man, Andrew. Holly is lucky to have you in her life,” he said quietly. Andrew let himself smile, just a little, and when Neil pulled him closer for a kiss, Andrew went with it. Andrew hadn’t expected to like lazily making out on a softly swinging chair as much as he did. They weren’t touching or grabbing, no fighting for dominance or playful teasing or asking for more, but it wasn’t gentle affectionate kissing either. They didn’t kiss like this very often, just arms draped around waists, lying on their sides as they kissed, tongues roving and mouths moving with no urgency. They kissed like they had all the time in the world, and in a way, they did. As Neil had said, no more airport goodbyes.


	29. "Welcome To My Family."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone, meet baby Holly.  
> Andrew is enamoured and Neil is shitting bricks, let's go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I've gotten a few people commenting on my portrayal of Andrew as neurodivergent, saying it is insensitive and inaccurate. All I am going to say on the matter is this; not only have I received feedback from neurodivergent people who read this saying they feel seen and understood, I myself am a neurodivergent individual and feel the representation rings true. If you are neurotypical, kindly stop making assumptions about your authors, and please do not speak for a community that can and does speak for themselves. If you are neurodivergent and still feel uncomfortable with my portrayal, message me privately- my socials are in the end notes.
> 
> Anyway, read on and enjoy the fluff and bonding <3

Andrew couldn’t explain why his palms were sweaty as he walked up the front path of Matt and Dan’s house. It was a nice house, bought with Matt’s pro league money, and big enough to raise their new family. Neil looked just as nervous at Andrew’s side as they stood on the front porch, and when Neil stared at the door like it was going to bite him, Andrew rolled his eyes and knocked. They heard heavy footsteps, which would mean Matt was coming to let them in.  
“Hey!” He said, grinning so wide it looked painful. Even still, the smile was not bright enough to detract from the exhausted look in his eyes. Andrew hadn’t met many new parents, but a month of babyhood had taken its toll on the backliner. He did look happy though, so that was something.

“Hey Matt,” Neil said nervously, letting his oldest friend give him a hug. Andrew appreciated that Matt didn’t come into his space or offer his hand for a shake, but he nodded back at him when Matt turned his greeting on him.

“Come in, come in! Meet your niece, give Dan a hug, but don’t freak out if she starts crying,” Mat said. Neil shot Andrew a serious look of alarm, and even though Andrew didn’t like the idea of Dan crying in front of them, the panic on his man’s face was a little amusing.

“Just hormones and exhaustion,” Andrew whispered so Matt wouldn’t hear him. “She is allowed to be sensitive.”

“I hate this,” Neil muttered, rubbing his face as they followed Matt down the hall. Andrew touched his shoulder briefly, but it was the best way he could think of to tell Neil that he was there as well, that it would be okay.

“Is Holly awake?” Andrew asked. Matt shot a surprised look over his shoulder in his direction, but Andrew kept his face carefully blank.

“She’s awake, just finished lunch,” Matt answered. “She’ll be happy and awake for a hot minute then hopefully she’ll fall asleep, but it’s not guaranteed.” Matt pushed open the door to the den and Andrew saw Dan with a bundle in her arms, sitting in an armchair and smiling down at the baby. Neil froze and Andrew had to push him in the back to get him moving into the room, nearly dropping his duffel bag in the process. Matt went over and kissed Dan’s head as she smiled up at Neil and Andrew.

“Hey guys, how was the drive?” Dan asked. It was only a five-and-a-half-hour drive, and even though Neil had asked if they could fly, he’d accepted Andrew’s firm no. They’d left in the morning and they’d shared the driving responsibility in time to arrive a little after twelve that afternoon.

“It was fine,” Neil said, his voice unashamedly an octave higher with his palpable anxiety. “H- how are you?”

“We’re good,” Dan said, smiling fondly at Neil. “Did you want to hold her?” Dan asked, holding her blue swaddled bundle out. Andrew was a little concerned by how quickly Neil paled.

“Um, how about… uh… Matt? Can you show me our room? I’ll just, uh, put our stuff away,” Neil said, stepping back and tripping over his duffel bag. Andrew caught him before his ass hit the ground, hauling him back to his feet and shook his head at him with a frown.

“You’re an idiot,” he muttered. Neil looked down at his feet, clearly ashamed of his behaviour, but still unwilling to hold Holly yet. Dan didn’t look very surprised, the smile on her mouth more amused than anything. Matt looked concerned, but he flicked a questioning look at Andrew as if asking _him_ for help, which was not something Andrew was familiar with. Andrew decided to take pity on his confusion and tilted his head at the door in silent encouragement to take Neil out of the room and show them their room. Neil might open up to him a little about why he was acting so weird. Andrew had his suspicions, but he’d not asked Neil directly yet, more curious to see how it played out first. Matt nodded once and walked towards Neil, clapping him on the shoulder.

“Come on, I’ll show you to your room. Andrew, are you coming?” Matt asked. Andrew shook his head and handed his bag to Neil, stepping out of the way of the door. Neil followed Matt out of the room, nearly stepping on the back of his heels in his hurry. Andrew turned back to face Dan and quietly stepped further into the room, his heart hammering in his chest. He didn’t know how to ask if he could see Holly, or hold her, but he wanted to. He couldn’t even look Dan directly in the eye, just looked at her shoulder as he walked a little closer.

“How about…” Dan began, and Andrew met her gaze and awkward smile, “I make this easy on both of us? Would you hold her for me while I go and make us hot cocoas?” It was not a subtle way of rescuing Andrew from asking and giving him a couple of minutes alone to deal with his thoughts and feelings and give Dan a couple minutes of reprieve.

“Yes,” Andrew said.

“Have you held a baby before?” Dan asked, and Andrew liked that there was no judgement in her voice, just genuine parental concern.

“I have,” Andrew assured her. He wasn’t about to explain the foster families with more children than they could look after who left the babies to the older kids to look after. Dan seemed to trust him, although Andrew couldn’t even understand why, she’d seen him at some low points in the years they’d known each other. He held his arms out and Dan handed her tiny baby over, watching as Andrew cradled her in his arms close to his chest. She was tiny, bundled up in a pale blue blanket, and Andrew couldn’t hide his small smile as he realised that she was wearing a pastel green onesie that he’d sent in the gift. He knew it was very possible that Holly would start screaming the minute she realised she wasn’t in her mom’s arms and that she had no idea who Andrew was, but for the minute she seemed content to blink up at him with big, dark eyes.

“Take a seat, if you want?” Dan said, changing from a command to a suggestion at the last minute. Andrew sat down on the couch, his heartrate slowing down to its sinus rhythm as he held her, feeling a little less terrified. In hindsight, it was rejection he’d been scared off. He hadn’t wanted Dan or Matt to mistrust him with their daughter, to shield her from him, although he would have understood if that’s what happened. Yet Dan rose from her armchair, smiled at Andrew, and left the room, supposedly to make the hot cocoas, leaving Andrew alone with her one-month old baby. He watched Holly babble up at him for a moment and he rearranged the blanket when he felt her arm wriggling, letting her wave her little fist. After a few tense minutes, he got comfortable in the corner of the couch and offered her his finger. She made a gurgling noise and latched on with her little hand and something inside Andrew unravelled.

“Welcome to my family,” he whispered, wiggling his finger gently in her grasp. He sensed Dan’s arrival in the doorway and glanced up as she came in, the soft smile on her face suggesting she’d heard him, but she didn’t say anything as she kicked the door closed behind her. She put a mug down on the coffee table in front of Andrew before turning to face him.

“Can I sit next to you?” She asked. Andrew frowned, mostly at the fact that she’d actually asked and not the fact that she wanted to sit closer to where her child was.

“Yes,” he confirmed. “Do you want your infant back?” He held her out a little, for her to take should she want to, but she shook her head.

“No,” Dan said with a small, amused smile as she sat down on the other side of the couch. It left a couch cushion between them, which Andrew appreciated, and she made herself comfortable. “She seems quite happy in your arms.”

“Okay,” Andrew said, bringing Holly back to his chest. They sat in silence for a long moment, Dan drinking her cocoa and Andrew watching as Holly tried in vain to get his finger into her mouth. “Gross.”

“You sent the present, didn’t you?” Dan said. Andrew froze, warning bells going off in his head and he refused to look at her even though his body was demanding to know where the danger was coming from. “It’s okay, Andrew, I wanted to thank you.”

“How did you know?” He demanded, still unwilling to relax or look at her.

“I know Neil’s handwriting, for one. Two, Neil is, um… not quite adept at gift giving? And three, the chocolates,” she answered. Andrew could sense her smile and he untensed his shoulders. He may have underestimated her then, and she did have a point about Neil and gifts.

“Fair,” he conceded.

“Why did you send it under Neil’s name?” Dan asked carefully. Andrew wasn’t entirely comfortable being open or vulnerable to Dan. He’d respected her as a captain, trusted her enough to lead the team his family played on, but he couldn’t remember a single time they’d been in a room alone together. “You don’t have to tell me, I know this is weird,” she said when Andrew remained silent.

“Because you would like it more coming from Neil,” Andrew said slowly. “You would trust it more.”

“Andrew, we love that it came from you, just as much as we love all of the gifts the team has sent us,” she said. “And, I don’t really know why, but we do trust you with her. Clearly, we had a good reason,” she added. Andrew glanced at her then and saw her gesture at the baby getting drowsy in his arms.

“Okay…” he said slowly, unsure of what she was expecting.

“I didn’t know you liked kids?” She hedged. He knew it was an invitation, and what surprised him was his desire to indulge it. He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly, relaxing completely and looking down into Holly’s face.

“Kids are born without having a say in it. So often the adults in their lives, parent or otherwise, don’t want them or don’t do right by them. It’s not the kid’s fault that they were born into their lives. We all know how hard it can really get, that’s why we know each other. I don’t mind kids. I feel like, more often than not, they deserve better than what they get.” He paused, choosing his words carefully. “I don’t think you and Matt are going to be bad parents or that you are going to screw up like most of our parents did. I do know that, purely because I was a Fox, that I will be an adult in Holly’s life just like Kevin, Allison, all of us.”

“Of course, if you want to be,” Dan agreed.

“I do,” Andrew said. “I promise you, and I promise her, that I am not going to be an adult in her life that screws up.”

“I know how big promises are to you,” Dan said quietly, and Andrew could hear the emotion in her voice, but he didn’t look over. “Thank you. I believe you.”

“Good,” Andrew said. They lapsed into silence again and Andrew watched Holly fall asleep, still holding onto his finger.

“Matt and I have been talking recently, about Holly’s godparents,” Dan said. Andrew tilted his head in her direction to acknowledge that she’d spoken and that he was curious to know where this was going, even though he would be quite comfortable existing in this space without conversation. “Did you want to guess who?”

“I don’t like guessing games,” Andrew told her, looking in her direction. She smiled around behind the rim of her mug and took a mouthful.

“Try?” She asked.

“Why have you resorted to asking things of me instead of telling me?” He asked, his resolve finally breaking a little bit. She looked surprised and lowered her mug.

“It took me a few years too long to realise that when Neil said, ‘I asked’, he genuinely just meant he’d asked. I know that we, the upperclassmen, often didn’t give you the chance to say no and when you did say no we didn’t always respect that answer. I know we should have; I know we handled a lot of things wrong. I am sorry. If we hadn’t treated you like a monster, maybe you wouldn’t have felt the need to act like one.” She sounded genuinely apologetic and Andrew frowned at her.

“I accept your apology,” he said. He did accept it; he hadn’t held a grudge against the upperclassmen anyway, but it was strangely freeing to hear. “Okay, I’ll guess.”

“Really?”

“Yes,” he confirmed. He didn’t think she’d ever really smiled at him like that. Like maybe she didn’t think he was a monster after all. “Is it Allison and Renee?”

“No, they are planning to adopt children of their own in the next few years and I think they’ll have their hands full. Besides, I can’t really see Allison coping well if Matt and I… well… were unable to look after Holly anymore.”

“Which means Renee would have their children and Allison to deal with before taking responsibility of Holly,” Andrew agreed. “Kevin then?”

“No, I still don’t trust Kevin to put anything else ahead of Exy,” she said with a slight eyeroll.

“Then I don’t know, I can’t remember any of your stage sisters’ names,” he told her. She smiled again, kind and friendly, and Andrew wasn’t sure he would get used to seeing it aimed at him anytime soon.

“Matt and I want Holly’s godparents to be protective and caring,” she said. “We want the people who will take her in should we die to be responsible, and devoted, and loving. People who will take her into their family and give her the life she deserves. People who would take the role seriously and want to have her should they need to take her.”

“Of course,” Andrew said, a little annoyed at her for stating the obvious.

“Andrew,” she said seriously, the tone of her voice making the hair rise on the back of his neck. “We want her godparent, or godparents as the case may be, to be people who would kill to protect her.” She didn’t blink as she spoke, and Andrew found he couldn’t look away. She meant it too, she wanted Holly’s godparents to be willing to take her in and protect her as if she was their own.

“Someone who would kill to keep a promise,” he said. Just like he had for Aaron, just like he would have done for Neil if he hadn’t let him walk out of his protection on the way to Maryland. Just like he would for Holly, to keep his promise to her and to Dan that he wouldn’t be an adult in her life who screwed up.

“Exactly,” she agreed.

“Me,” he said.

“Yes, Andrew. Matt and I want you and Neil to be her godparents. We know you would do the right thing by her if we can’t,” she confirmed.

“Last I heard, you nearly threw up when you found out I killed Aaron’s mom,” he said, narrowing his eyes at her. He wasn’t sure he trusted her change of heart, but he was willing to hear her out if there was something that she wanted to say.

“I don’t think I’ll ever understand what happened that night. But, if someone did to Holly what Aaron’s mom did to him, I know I would do everything in my power to stop it. I don’t like what you did, you can’t ask me to, but I get that you did what you had to do to protect your brother and keep your word. No matter how misguided it may have been.” She smiled at him, a little guarded maybe, but it was something. He nodded his head at her, taking her words for what they were; a bridge for them to cross. A chance for this to be more than awkward pleasantries and a past of anger, apathy and distrust.

“Okay. Neil isn’t going to like it, so I will not speak for him, but I accept the responsibility,” he told her. Her face broke out in a big grin and he looked down at Holly to avoid eye contact.

“You hear that, baby girl? This is your godfather, Andrew,” Dan coddled at her baby.

“Who will never talk to you in a voice like that,” Andrew told Holly, although she was asleep- and an infant - so it didn’t matter. “So, I can send her presents?” He asked Dan, feeling a little embarrassed and still refusing to make eye contact. Dan laughed and leaned back again.

“Sure, just try not to spoil her. You can visit too, and maybe when she’s older she can have sleepovers in Chicago if you want,” she said, sounding delighted. Andrew didn’t think him being given this much responsibility of her child would make her so happy, but he didn’t think he wanted to question it.

“Neil will be thrilled,” Andrew said sarcastically.

“Will you ask him about the godparent thing? I think he’ll take it easier from you,” she said.

“Okay,” he agreed, but only because she was right. If Dan or Matt asked, he might throw up. It would be better if Andrew did it.

“Why is he scared of her, do you know?” She asked. Andrew hummed in response, looking towards the shut door Neil still hadn’t reappeared in.

“I have my suspicions, but we have not talked about it.”

“Will you share your theories with me?” She asked.

“It isn’t Holly he’s scared of; it’s himself,” Andrew said, turning his face to look at her again. She raised her eyebrow in curious invitation, and he shrugged with one shoulder. “I don’t think Neil’s ever been this close to a child this small, especially not one he cares about. He doesn’t really know what to do, but he doesn’t want to do it wrong.”

“But he does care about her?” Dan asked. Andrew couldn’t pretend he didn’t hear the worry in her voice, and he rolled his eyes.

“Yes, he does. It’s just new. Give him time, he was the same with the kittens last year,” he told her.

“Will you help him?”

“Help him what?” Andrew asked, wondering if she meant help him love Holly because as weird as Neil was being, he did love her.

“Just, holding her or being around her without looking faint,” Dan explained, lips twitched in a smile. The door opened before Andrew could answer, revealing Matt and Neil. Neil was glaring at Dan, but she smiled innocently back.

“I’m not going to faint,” he snapped. He turned his glare on Andrew, but it melted off his face when he saw that he was holding Holly. “How are you doing that?” He asked, voice soft with wonder.

“Sit down,” Andrew told him, gesturing at the couch cushion between him and Dan. Neil went pale again, but not quite as pale as the first time he’d been asked to hold her. He slinked across the room and gingerly sat down between them, angled a little towards Andrew and Holly. There was two ways that Andrew could play this, he either give Neil the chance to get used to being close to her before handing her over, or he put her in his arms and let him deal with his anxiety himself. Andrew wasn’t a very patient person, but he did have responsibility now, so he angled his own body so Neil could look down at Holly’s sleeping face.

“She’s cute,” Neil observed quietly.

“She is,” Andrew said. “She also won’t hurt you. Put your arms out.”

“No, but…” Neil trailed off when he looked up at Andrew’s expression and sighed. “Okay.” He held his arms out and Andrew carefully handed him Holly.

“Support her neck, don’t squeeze, and breathe,” he said, adding the last one when he realised Neil was holding his breath. It took another moment for Neil to let it out in a quiet whoosh. Apart from being frozen, he was doing everything else right and Holly’s parents watched as Andrew gingerly pried his finger from Holly’s fist to let Neil do it entirely on his own. After a silent count of ten, Neil relaxed a little bit, leaning back into the couch and breathing slowly in through his nose and out his mouth.

“Are you okay?” Dan asked kindly, putting her hand on Neil’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” he agreed, and finally a little twitch of his lips said he was finally getting it. “She is really, really small.”

“She is,” Andrew said. “Now Dan, take her off him for a moment,” he said. Neil frowned and Dan shot him a curious look, but when Andrew raised his eyebrows at her she seemed to remember her request that he tell Neil about their new role. Neil relinquished Holly to Dan’s arms, and then turned another suspicious frown in Andrew’s direction.

“What is going on?” He asked.

“I didn’t want you to drop her,” he said. “You know what godparents are?”

“Yeah, they take on a kid if the parents die or are unable to look after them?”

“Right,” Andrew said. “Well congratulations, you’re a godfather. Well, we both are.” Andrew watched as Neil processed that, and then his eyes nearly bugged out of his head.

“What?” He choked out. “You’re lying.”

“Really, Neil?” Andrew sighed, narrowing his eyes at him. Neil registered his accusation and winced.

“No, I know you don’t lie to me,” he corrected himself. “I just… what? Why us?” He turned the question on Dan and Matt. Dan smiled at him, as fond of Neil as ever, and Matt just shrugged with one shoulder, sinking down on the abandoned armchair.

“Who better than the rich, secretly nerdy, scary protective, gay uncles to take her in if we die?” Matt teased.

“Neither of us are maternal, obviously, and I certainly don’t have a paternal bone in my body,” Neil argued.

“Man, you’re thinking way too hard about this,” Matt said. “It’s a worst case scenario situation. And you’ll be okay, should that happen, but it won’t, so chill.”

“Besides,” Dan said, sending a wink in Andrew’s direction which was as perplexing as it was new. “Andrew adores her already, so you’ll be hard pressed turning it down now.”

“Drew?” Neil said, turning a searching look on Andrew who stared right back at him. “Okay,” he said after a few moments.

“Yeah?” Matt asked, grinning at his best friend.

“Yeah,” Neil agreed, and he looked at Dan shyly. “Can I have my goddaughter back?” He asked quietly, holding his arms out awkwardly. Dan grinned too and placed Holly in Neil’s arms who held her close to his chest. “Welcome to my family,” he whispered. Andrew didn’t even try to hide his tiny smile, just leaned close and pressed a quick kiss to Neil’s cheek and when he pulled back, he met Dan’s eyes. _Thank you_ she mouthed. He inclined his head in acknowledgement and got comfortable at Neil and Holly’s side.

*

After two nights in a house with a one-month old baby, Andrew understood why new parents always looked sleep deprived. It took a lot longer for Andrew and Neil to drive back to Chicago than it had to get to Columbus because they had to stop more frequently for coffee and stretching so they didn’t fall asleep behind the wheel, even with infrequent naps when the other was driving.  
They didn’t say a word the entire ride, and when they got home the tramped up their stairs, dropped their bags on the floor and folded themselves into their bed.

“Matt and Dan are saints,” Neil mumbled, toeing his shoes off and kicking them across the room before wriggling under the blanket. Andrew was bone weary and only had it in him to grunt in agreement as he rolled over to face the wall. “She’s cute though, so I forgive her,” Neil added.

“Shush,” Andrew said, rolling back over to pull Neil against his chest. Neil rolled over so his back was against Andrew and he felt him start to relax.

“Maybe that’s why you let me get away with things,” he mused sleepily. “I’m cute.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Andrew groaned, putting his hand over Neil’s mouth. He felt Neil kiss his palm and he sighed, moving his hand back to Neil’s clothed abdomen. Neil stayed quiet for a long moment and Andrew closed his eyes, pressing his face to the back of Neil’s neck and getting comfortable.

“Hey, handsome?” Neil asked, rolling under Andrew’s arm. Andrew opened his eyes to glare at him for being so annoying, but the look on his face was nervous, his lower lip sucked into his mouth. Andrew frowned and put his hand on Neil’s scarred cheek, using the pad of his thumb to pull Neil’s lip out from between his teeth.

“What is it, baby?” He asked.

“I love Holly, I do, but… I really don’t want to have kids,” he whispered. Andrew laughed, surprising both of them, and relief filled his chest. He pressed a kiss to Neil’s forehead and when he pulled back, it was Neil’s turn to be frowning. “You’re okay with that?”

“I don’t want kids either,” Andrew said. He was okay with being ‘Uncle Andrew’ to the First Fox’s kids when they had them and being Holly’s godfather was quietly very important to him, but Andrew had no intention of being a father.

“I just thought, after seeing you with Holly all weekend, that it would be something you wanted yourself one day,” Neil admitted. Andrew shook his head and nestled further under the blankets.

“No thank you,” Andrew said, closing his eyes. “Just you and me, and maybe a cat, until we’re old and grey and dying.”

“Morbid,” Neil mused, but Andrew could sense his smile. “Did you say a cat?”

“I did,” Andrew said, smiling himself.

“I don’t fucking think so,” Neil said firmly. Andrew decided to change the subject.

“I cannot believe you thought I’d want a kid,” he said. “We are both pro athletes who travel every other week for six months of the year. One of us would have to retire to raise the kid on our own and that sure as shit wouldn’t be you. You think I’d want to do that?”

“Shut up, Drew,” Neil moaned, but his chest vibrated with laughter. Andrew opened one eye and smiled. Neil shook his head at him but kissed him quickly and rolled back over so they could finally have an afternoon nap. He had been serious about the cat though. Getting cats was one of two things he’d been thinking about a lot recently, ever since they signed the deed to their house. The other was asking Neil to marry him, but every time Andrew thought about it, he started to spiral down a deep, dark well.  
He loved Neil. Neil loved him. If one of them was sick or dying in hospital, they wouldn’t be allowed in because they aren’t married or related. Marriage is a big commitment. What if Neil said no? He’s never even hinted at the idea of marriage. Why should Andrew risk what they had? Marriage was an arbitrary concept condoned by the fucking church. He wasn’t even sure it was legal? Would they have to actually plan a wedding? Gross. Why did it matter? He didn’t even have a ring. Was he supposed to buy an engagement ring?

Andrew sighed heavily out of his nose and closed his eyes tighter, willing himself to sleep.


	30. "Never Better."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soft? Fluffy? Loving? Protective Neil? Defensive Andrew? I think yes!   
> Finally gave Neil a TikTok account and this fic is just soft and fun and kind of whimsical and all in love and all that good stuff.   
> (You don't really need TikTok to get the gist or the softness of the fic dw)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Neil is naked for like half of this fic so if that makes you uncomfortable I am sorryyyyy

Neil stared down at the phone in his hand, chewing on his lip as considered his options. It wasn’t often that Neil bought his cell phone into the bathroom when he showered, but he’d needed it close if he was going to do what he’d been thinking about all weekend. Robin had stayed with the two of them for a few nights at the start of the week now that they had a bed in the second bedroom. Wymack had signed her out of classes and sent her to Chicago because he’d noticed deterioration in her mental health and had grown concerned. A change of scene and routine seemed to have helped their younger friend because by the end of the three days she was smiling and laughing again. While she’d been there, she’d spent more than a few hours with her head on one of their laps, eating M&Ms and showing them what she called TikTok videos. Andrew had maintained that he was unamused and uninterested in the videos, but he watched each one she showed him and before she left, he had downloaded the app and promised to watch any she sent him. Neil had been a little more intrigued by the short videos and had also downloaded the app. As Robin had apparently suspected, he’d found himself on the ‘Exy side of TikTok’, which meant he scrolled past lots of videos of pro and collegiate Exy players doing trick shots, tutorials, videos answering fan questions and annoying their friends and family. He’d found and followed accounts of people he had played with and against, watching them do dances and trends and transitions. He’d seen multiple accounts dedicated to himself, Andrew and their extended friend groups of teammates past and present. They called themselves ‘simps’ and posted edits of their desired players from interviews, games and their own TikTok accounts. The ones he found most perplexing were the ones that were edited to make it look like the person behind the account was dating their preferred player. Splicing footage they’d filmed themselves with out of context snippets of the player, captioning it with a story and posting it. He didn’t follow anyone who made videos like that, although it wouldn’t really matter if he did because his username was still, ‘user…’ followed by a random assortment of numbers. Robin had shown Neil how to change his display and username if he decided to post any videos and ever since then, Neil had been tempted. She’d also showed him how to use voice effects, which was what had started the idea forming in Neil’s head. He wanted to post videos, but he didn’t want to be in them. He wanted to annoy Andrew from behind the camera and see what happened. The idea had cemented in his mind the day before when he had seen Oscar’s newest video, ‘Walking in on my gay bf and ace bf naked’. You didn’t see Oscar at all, just the towel he dropped to the floor, and then you followed his perspective down their hallway to where Jaiden and Dante were playing a video game. Jaiden’s surprise had given way to a grin as his eyes roved Oscar’s body and Dante laughed as he scrambled to pause their game.   
“You’re hot babe, but could you not have waited ten minutes?” Dante had complained, but you could see how happy he was as he got comfortable, watching Jaiden launch himself off the couch to Oscar.

“No, now is good!” Jaiden had said, this time making Oscar laugh before the video ended, restarting the loop. It was display of their relationship that they could control. It showed people how real their relationship was, how happy they were, and it was now catalogued for them to revisit later if they wanted to. But most of all, it looked _fun._  
Neil toyed with his phone a little more before scolding himself for being a coward. He had been through countless more terrifying things than filming Andrew whilst naked. Hell, he’d even taken pictures of Andrew when he was behind the camera naked. Besides, no one would know it was him behind the camera, except for their friends and family who wouldn’t care other than be surprised they’d crossed one of their privacy lines. Neil smiled at that thought, the bubbles of anxiety melting away. He could always just delete the video and not post it, especially if Andrew told him to. He sighed and opened the app, going into the ‘Edit Profile’ section. _@annoying_minyard_ became the username, his display name was simply _Nothing_ and the bio was Neil’s favourite part. _I’m the only person who can get under Andrew Minyard’s skin._ Lastly, he made his profile picture the Lion’s logo and then he was ready. He opened to the filming page and pressed the red button, dropped his towel and immediately realised he hadn’t changed the time limit from fifteen seconds to sixty. This was immediately too hard, but some part of him was now determined to try. He groaned, collected up his towel again, changed the settings and tried again. He dropped his towel and, finding no faults, smiled to himself as he yanked open the downstairs bathroom door, which was closer to their backyard where he’d been practicing, and raced through the living room to their stairs and up to their bedroom door. He didn’t really have time to hesitate so he threw open the door, making sure to keep the camera angled away from his identifiably scarred hands like he had downstairs, and aimed the camera at Andrew. The blonde was sitting on their bed in the black hoodie Neil had stolen years ago and sweatpants, reading a book on his lap and eating Skittles. Nothing changed in Andrew’s expression to give away his reaction to seeing Neil standing in their doorway naked, but his hand had paused halfway to the bag of candy and he didn’t look away. It was the pause that told Neil everything and he grinned at him from behind the camera, smug excitement rising in his stomach. He’d caught Andrew by surprise, and Andrew had _liked it._

“What are you doing?” Andrew asked, commencing his reach for Skittles. Neil could see how hard he was trying to keep his gaze on Neil’s face, which just made it all the more fun for Neil.

“Wanting to see your reaction to me walking in naked,” he answered.

“I thought only girls did this trend?” Andrew said, pointing at the phone. Neil was surprised that he even knew the trend.

“And I thought you didn’t watch TikTok,” Neil retorted. Andrew threw a Skittle at him in response. “So, you’re not going to chase me around the house?”

“Baby, when have I chased you anywhere?” Andrew asked, tilting his head. Neil laughed and shrugged his shoulder.

“I think you’re supposed to react more,” Neil teased. Andrew rolled his eyes and closed his book.

“I’ve been seeing you naked for six years, and I have an eidetic memory,” Andrew reminded him without inflection, but then his lip curled in the corner in a smile that always meant trouble for Neil. “But, when you’re done being annoying, you can put the phone down and come here.”

“Okay,” Neil agreed, heat curling in his belly and he stopped recording, turned the screen off and crossed the room to crawl to Andrew against the headboard.

“You’re the worst,” Andrew murmured, pulling him down for a kiss as Neil made himself comfortable in his lap.

“Uh huh, I must be,” Neil hummed, feeling underneath him just how much Andrew didn’t mean that. Andrew tugged on his hair in admonishment and pulled back, looking up at him. Neil smirked and chased his lips for another kiss.

“So, what was that about?” Andrew asked, pulling back a second time, his head hitting the headboard. Neil smiled with all of his teeth, a look that feigned innocence and usually made Andrew smile, but today Andrew just raised an eyebrow and waited patiently, his hands settling down on Neil’s bare thighs.

“It just sounded fun,” Neil admitted. “I wanted to try it.”

“Okay,” Andrew said. “I want to see.” He held his hand out for the phone and Neil realised how much he didn’t want Andrew to shut this down. If Andrew said no, then Neil would delete everything, but he didn’t want to him. He unlocked his screen and passed the phone across, moving to sit next to Andrew so they could watch it together. It wasn’t quite as fun and carefree as Oscar’s video with Jaiden and Dante, but Neil liked it. Andrew looked as bored as always, but their back and forth taunts were real and Neil thought it was funny, especially when Andrew threw the Skittle at him. The fact that Andrew even called him annoying just proved his username and bio correct, which was quite satisfying to him.

“You kind of outed yourself,” Neil noticed, eyes widening.

“Did I?” Andrew asked, faux innocently.

“When you made the comment about girls doing this trend, you suggested that the person flashing you is not a girl,” Neil pointed out. Andrew raised his eyebrows as Neil explained, entirely unamused. “You did that on purpose.”

“You should have learnt by now that I don’t make mistakes,” Andrew said.

“But you’re okay with that?” Neil checked.

“I haven’t said you can post the video yet,” Andrew reminded him, handing the phone back over as Neil accepted disappointment. “You can. Post it I mean.”

“Wait, really?” Neil asked, smiling as he climbed back onto his lap.

“Yes, really. I’m over answering ‘who is your girlfriend’ questions anyway. Going into three years pro, that particular line of questioning is getting particularly tedious.” Andrew kissed Neil softly, but Neil was smiling too much to return it.

“It’s really okay?” Neil checked.

“Stop,” Andrew warned. “I wouldn’t have said it was okay if I didn’t mean it. Just make sure you close caption the video.”

“Okay, yeah sure, I can do that!” Neil agreed excitedly. Andrew bodily removed Neil from his lap and Neil burst out laughing as he fell into the mattress, only moving when he felt Andrew trying to dig under his shoulders for the book he’d tossed to the side before. “Hey, I thought you were a little more interested in the fact that I am naked than this,” Neil said, angling his head to look at Andrew. He knew arousal didn’t mean consent, but he’d thought Andrew was more in the mood than he looked now.

“Come here,” Andrew said, hooking one arm under Neil and pulling him against his chest to kiss his forehead. “Post the video, then ask me, okay?”

“Okay,” Neil agreed, getting comfortable in his arms to edit the video while Andrew used Neil’s back as a place to rest his book.

It didn’t take too long, although longer than he would have expected, and he put his phone on the bedside table and pressed a kiss to Andrew’s cheek.   
“Yes or no?” He asked. Andrew angled his head to kiss him properly and Neil felt the book get lifted from his back and put on the table next to his phone.

“Yes,” Andrew confirmed, sliding down to lie on his back and hold Neil on top of him. Neil heard it before he felt it, the bag of Skittles getting jostled and all of the coloured candy pieces getting spilled across their covers, racing towards the dip in the bed that they made with their combined weight. Neil moaned and went to climb off Andrew and clean up, but Andrew held him fast.

“Andrew, I am not having sex on a bed of Skittles,” Neil told him. Andrew’s eyes went wide, as if that was the best idea he’d heard all day. “I mean it, Drew,” Neil said, sounding as bewildered as he felt that he actually had to say those words.

“I kind of want to,” Andrew said, eyes still wide and now starting to smile. Neil started laughing and looked at the mess along Andrew’s side where the rainbow was collecting.

“How does that even work?” Neil asked, still laughing. Andrew reached down, scooped up a handful and put it in his mouth. He chewed happily and lifted to pull his shirt up, the Skittles rolling under him. Neil covered his eyes with his hands, grinning at his ridiculous boyfriend, laughing yet again when Andrew put his hands on Neil’s ribs and rocked up into him. The fact that Neil knew there were Skittles under Andrew’s back just made him want to kiss his man stupid at the same time as he wanted to clean off their bed.   
“This is bullshit,” Neil told him, uncovering his eyes to smile down at Andrew and shake his head, his heart swelling with an obscene amount of giddy happiness and love. Andrew looked so content lying under Neil shirtless, lips stained colours from the Skittles he’d already eaten and wasn’t lying on top of, his gilded eyes and hair shining in the mid-afternoon light streaming through their bedroom window. For the first time since the morning after the pre-championship party, Andrew’s sleepy promise came back to Neil. ‘On the day we get married.’ _I’m going to marry this man one day,_ Neil thought to himself and the idea slotted into place in his heart and he let out a slow, dizzying breath.

“Are you okay?” Andrew asked.

“Never better,” Neil told him honestly before leaning down to kiss the too-sweet fruit taste from his mouth. Andrew made a pleased noise and put his hands flat on Neil’s back, holding him close as they kissed.

*

The video went viral. Neil hadn’t expected it to reach an audience because he’d had no followers when he posted the video to TikTok so who was supposed to see it? Apparently, everyone. Neil didn’t know it had gone viral though, until he walked into training four days after the video was posted and the entire team was sitting in the lounge waiting for Andrew.   
“Do you know where Andrew is?” Calum demanded.

“Uh, parking?” Neil answered warily. “Why?”

“Did you know he was gay?” Jane asked from where she stood next to Olivia. The latter of which was stifling her laughs with her fist. Neil realised everyone in the room had seen the video, and he resisted the urge to take his phone out and see the extent of its reach.

“Yes,” Neil said. “All of the Foxes know, he… uh…” he trailed off as the entry door closed behind him and Andrew came in.

“Came out in my sophomore year,” Andrew said plainly. “Is it really worth a team meeting? Especially since some of you already knew.”

“I’m just here for the show,” Olivia said, holding her hands up in surrender, her voice bubbly with amusement.

“I told them it wasn’t important,” Alex Rossen added, shaking his head in resignation.

“So, you lied to us?” Josh accused, crossing his arms. Neil took a small step away from Andrew at that, letting him have the floor to deal with that how he felt fit.

“I am not a liar,” Andrew said.

“This ‘girlfriend’,” Josh said, putting air quotes around the word, “isn’t actually a girlfriend?”

“I never said girlfriend,” Andrew said with a bored sigh. “You guys assumed my partner’s gender and I didn’t correct you. That is on you, not me.” The silence that stretched through the room at Andrew’s answer was telling and half the team shifted uncomfortably.

“You could have just told us man, we don’t care,” Calum said quietly, almost awkwardly. Neil wondered idly when the two cousins had been made spokespeople for this particular ordeal. Andrew narrowed his eyes at the taller man and curled his lip in annoyance and distaste.

“You are both obnoxious and rude, and the rest of you do your level best to avoid me outside of training and games. I told Olivia, I told Alex, why would I tell any of you?”

“You didn’t tell me, my cousin did,” Olivia supplied unhelpfully. Neil put his head in his hands and took a deep breath.

“How did you find out, Josten?” Someone else in the group, who hadn’t yet spoken, asked. Neil lowered his hands and realised they were shaking. He felt trapped, backed into a wall. He felt like it was being forced out of him to tell his team about his relationship, and that wasn’t something he felt he could respond well to. He met Andrew’s gaze and saw his concerned frown, aimed at him so that their team wouldn’t see.

“You don’t have to tell them anything,” Andrew said in Russian.

“I feel cornered,” Neil admitted. “This isn’t how I want to tell them.”

“Then don’t,” Andrew said firmly. “You also found out before I said I’d blow you,” he reminded Neil. That skewed things into clarity, and he huffed in amusement.

“True, you sent me on a goose chase with Renee,” he remembered. Andrew nodded once and turned back to face their team. Neil spoke next in English and addressed the gathering. “A friend of ours, Renee, told me my freshman year.”

“Do you know his boyfriend?” Jane asked, smiling softly. She looked curious, but not with malicious intent. Now that Neil had regathered some of his calm, he realised none of them actually looked disgusted. They seemed annoyed, maybe, that Andrew hadn’t told them, or a little confused, but none of them look as if they hated Andrew for his sexuality. It wouldn’t matter if they did, Neil had dealt with Jack for four years, but it was still a nice realisation.

“Yeah, I know him. He’s a bit of an asshole,” Neil answered. Olivia’s laugh was so loud she covered her mouth in alarm. Alex rolled his eyes, but his smile was amused as he shook his head. The Lions looked at Andrew as if he was about to defend his boyfriend from the slander.

“Don’t look at me,” Andrew said. “He’s not wrong.”

“I think the message got lost there somewhere, but we are glad you came out and you’re still part of our team and all that good shit,” Calum said quietly, looking still a little put out by Andrew’s accusation earlier.

“Did you think I was worried?” Andrew asked, eyebrow raised dubiously.

“We just thought it would be good for you to know,” Coach Miles said, speaking for the first time.

“Good talk,” Andrew said with a roll of his eyes before he was pushing through the group to the locker rooms to change out. The group dispersed awkwardly after that and Neil went to Olivia where she was still standing, now alone.

“Are you going to make more videos?” She asked in lieu of a greeting. Neil smiled and shrugged with one shoulder.

“It was fun, I might,” he said.

“See how annoying you can be without crossing a line?” She guessed. Neil nodded his head and they walked side by side down the hall to their separate locker rooms.

“That is the ultimate goal, yes,” he answered. She grinned, ruffled his hair and pushed open her door. Neil went into his own changeroom and nearly walked directly into Calum who was standing just inside the door, staring at Andrew. Neil flicked a curious gaze to his man, and judging by the tension in his shoulders, he knew he was being watched. “Is there a problem?” Neil asked, skirting around the taller man and subtly putting himself between them. Calum looked as if Neil had electrocuted him and he dropped the training shirt he’d been holding.

“No, uh, no problem,” he answered as he bent to pick it up, but he seemed to consider that for a moment and leaned in closer to Neil, sending Neil’s anxiety and fight or flight instincts through the roof. “Um, are Andrew and his boyfriend like serious?” He asked. Neil forcibly had to keep his fist at his side, wanting to react before he had even processed the question.

“Yes,” he answered firmly. “Nearly six years of serious.” He tried for a smile, but it mustn’t have looked very welcoming because Calum frowned and leaned back a bit.

“Do you know if they have hall passes? Is he a pro player too? Do they live together, give me the details?” Calum pressed. Neil wondered what it was about his expression that was encouraging his questions so he knew what to change next time he was in this position. As it was, Neil was still considering punching him in his earnest, insistent face just to break eye contact. He felt someone grab the back of his shirt and he was pulled forcefully backwards before he could raise his hand more than an inch. Calum looked alarmed and flailed backwards as if Neil had actually hit him.

“You hit him, then he hits you, then I have to get involved and I am not in the mood,” Andrew warned, releasing the back of Neil’s shirt and pointing a warning finger at him. The other men in the changeroom were pretending not to watch, but none of them were moving very fast. Neil held his hands up in surrender, but he couldn’t wipe the glare off his face yet.

“You two don’t make sense, you hate each other but keep jumping in to stop fights and defend. What the fuck?” Calum asked, looking pale at most likely being caught out for asking nosy questions. In the back of Neil’s head, he heard Andrew, Nicky and Oscar all telling him his ‘gaydar’ really is broken.

“Listen here, fuckface,” Neil snapped, but Andrew cut him off with another pointed finger.

“Cut it out,” he snapped in Russian.

“Did you hear his questions?” Neil demanded. “I’m allowed to be angry.”

“Yes, I heard. Go change out,” he said firmly. Neil didn’t feel like being told what to do right then but crossing his arms and continuing this glaring contest would look petulant.

“I am mad at you now,” Neil grumbled, continuing the Russian conversation, and stalked to his locker, which was thankfully still within earshot.

“See, what was that about? You jump in to stop a fight, but then yell and shout at each other in a different language. It’s terrifying,” Calum snapped. Neil turned to watch as Andrew lowered his pointed finger and turned to face Calum with a dangerously blank expression.

“If I’m so terrifying, why are you asking about my relationship and ‘hall passes’?” Andrew asked, voice low. Calum went another shade paler and stepped back, his back to the door now. The Lions claimed they hadn’t seen Andrew snap, but Neil was wondering if they were about to.

“I, it’s not, I wasn’t going to make a move or anything, unless I knew what the situation was, you know?” Calum spluttered out.

“No hall passes, but more importantly, no interest. Yes, he plays Exy too, and yes, we live together. Like Neil said, he is also an asshole, so fuck off,” Andrew told him.

“I hear you loud and clear,” Calum confirmed, but he flicked a curious gaze between Andrew and Neil, and his lips curled in a smile as he realised. Neil waited for the question or the comment, but he just nodded his head once in understanding and held his hands up in surrender. Andrew turned and walked away without another word. Neil frowned at Calum as the other man came towards him.

“I get why you were going to hit me now,” he said quietly. “I won’t say anything, not my place, but I see it now. And you’re right, you kind of are an asshole.”

“I know,” Neil said, opening his locker. Calum laughed, although he still seemed a little shaky, and went back to changing out. Neil felt the weight of Andrew’s gaze on him and looked over to meet his heavy look. When he spoke, it was loud enough to be heard across the room, but in Russian, “He’s not as stupid as he looks, and before you can ask, I’m fine.”

“’Fine’, he says,” Andrew mocked, but he turned back to his locker and let it drop.

*

Neil didn’t get a chance to look at the video until he and Andrew got home later that evening. Andrew started cutting up vegetables for a stir-fry noodle dinner and Neil sat on the barstool across from him to watch. Neil knew a lot of dishes that provided well from his life on the run, but all of them contained canned food and fruit, which didn’t really cut it in the adult world. Andrew knew some more interesting, real recipes after watching Abby cook every summer. Neil guessed some of the dishes Andrew had started making in the more recent years were from his childhood, as he seemed to be getting just a little better at recalling things he wanted to recall instead of drowning in traumatic sensory memories if he tried to think back. Usually, they cooked dinner together, Neil trying to learn or the two of them faking their way through recipes they found online, but sometimes Andrew just wanted to try something on his own and Neil sat and watched or went down to the couch to watch Exy or read.   
“What are we listening to?” Neil asked, gesturing at the speaker in the corner of the kitchen that Andrew had hooked his phone to.

“I don’t know, it’s a playlist Will made me on Spotify,” Andrew answered, separating the head of broccoli from its stalk. Neil kept one ear on the music and one eye on Andrew as he pulled his phone out of his (Andrew’s) hoodie pocket and opened TikTok to the video. It had over a million views and a scary amount of comments, but what was worse was Neil had followers. Hundreds of thousands of followers.

“Am I going to have to get verified on TikTok?” Neil asked with a sigh. Andrew hummed and looked up, still chopping the broccoli which gave Neil a small amount of anxiety.

“Just send Fi an email and she will sort that out, that’s what I did,” Andrew answered.

“You don’t even post on the stupid app, why are you verified?” He asked. Andrew frowned at him, a look that told Neil it was obvious.

“It’s in our contracts, we have to tell Fi when we have new social media accounts and send her our username and password so she can filter comments and things like that,” he said, looking back down at the food preparation.

“I didn’t read my contract very hard then,” Neil mused, tapping his phone against his lips. “Oh, wait. It’s just your freaky picture-perfect brain that makes you remember the contract so well,” he realised. Andrew shrugged that off without comment and Neil sent the email to Fiona for her to get around to when she was ready.

“You want to be verified with ‘annoying Minyard’?” Andrew asked dubiously.

“Why not?” Neil replied with a smile. “It’s what I’m best at,” he added. When Andrew didn’t warrant that with a response, Neil opened the phone back to the video, paused its incessant loop, and scrolled the comments. Most of them were asking if Andrew was gay or who ‘the guy filming’ was. Some commented on how ‘bored’ Andrew looked at being walked in on and were apologising to his boyfriend for Andrew’s unenthusiastic reaction. More than a few were calling it fake, saying he must have found that footage of Andrew somewhere else and spliced it together to make it look like he was gay and dating someone. Neil lifted his head up and looked at Andrew after a little while of reading. He was in a long sleeved, dark grey v neck tee-shirt that had water stains at the collar from his wet hair which he had tied back in a damp, dark gold ponytail for cooking. His cheeks were a little bit pink from the steam he’d just released from a pot of boiling water, and he had his glasses on to pay attention to the recipe. It was his Andrew, the competent, calm, in control, comfortable Andrew that was a little bit soft and very much at home. He was beautiful with his hard and sharp edges, lips full and pink from biting them when he concentrated, eyes and hair bright and shiny.   
“Will you do some TikTok videos?” Neil asked him, liking the idea of sharing a small glimpse of this version of his man with the world, just to prove that it exists and in some small, possessive way, show that he was taken.

“These ones don’t need a surprise reaction then?” Andrew guessed, not looking up as he put the noodles in the pot.

“No, I’ll just film your response to some questions,” Neil explained. Andrew seemed to consider that for a moment before looking up and using the knucklehead on his index finger to fix his glasses.

“Do I have a choice?” He asked. Neil nodded earnestly, because even though Neil did want to try this and see what Andrew would say to some of the questions, he would obviously respect Andrew’s wishes if he turned the prospect away.   
“Sure, but if I do not like a question then I will not answer,” Andrew warned him. That was more than Neil had been expecting and he grinned, watching as Andrew started sorting out the marinated chicken for their dinner. Neil chose a comment and set up the video response, camera aimed at Andrew on the other side of the counter, gave Andrew a warning and pressed record.

“So many people asked this, so was my first video of you fake?” Neil asked, not reading the question word for word, but knowing the gist of it.

“I wish,” Andrew answered easily. Neil smiled and waited to see if there was more and when he didn’t say anything or lower the camera, Andrew looked over. “No, it was not fake, he really did think being naked when he walked in would elicit an interesting reaction. You would think he’d know better now.”

“You would think,” Neil echoed, ending the recording. Andrew didn’t react, just went back to dinner and Neil saved the video to drafts to close caption and post later. “Okay, next question, are you gay?” Neil asked. Andrew snorted in surprise at the bluntness and dropped onions into the hot oil in the frying pan.

“Last I checked,” he answered when the hissing went down a little bit. Neil felt warm with pride for him for finally feeling comfortable enough to really share it with people. He knew Andrew hadn’t withheld it because of shame or fear, but more because of his sharp, severe personal and privacy lines. Neil didn’t think having those lines was a bad thing, he had his own, but he did like that in some ways, Andrew’s strict boundaries were softening. He knew Andrew’s therapist, the one he’d been seeing since he left Palmetto at Betsy’s insistence, was helping Andrew with some of his hard edges, but choosing when- and even how- to come out was all Andrew, and that meant something. He saved the video and set up the next one.

“Who am I to you?” Neil asked. Andrew didn’t even miss a beat.

“My significant annoyance,” Andrew said. Neil laughed and zoomed in just a little on the tiny amused smile on Andrew’s face before zooming back to normal.

“I honestly thought you were going to call me your ‘significant other’,” Neil told him. Andrew recoiled a little and shot Neil an unimpressed look.

“Since when have I ever called you that?”

“Never, that’s why I was confused,” Neil explained. “And I know I do annoy you, but is that really what I am to you?”

“At the moment you are,” Andrew said, reaching for a wooden spoon and turning to the stove.

“Maybe at this very moment, but what about always?” Neil pressed, knowing which buttons to push to be just annoying enough that it entertained others and wouldn’t push Andrew too far.

“Are you really just trying to get me to call you my boyfriend?” Andrew asked, shaking his head down at their dinner. Neil hummed his agreement, a grin splitting his face open.

“Maybe,” Neil teased.

“You are an idiot,” Andrew said. “But you are also my boyfriend, so I guess that makes me an idiot too for choosing this,” he added with a sigh. Neil laughed and ended the video, saving it before choosing one more which Neil thought seemed kind of important and would actually mean something to Andrew.

“Last one,” Neil said. Andrew nodded once in agreement and poured the noodles into the strainer. “Do I have permission from you to post private videos of you?”

“Oh, good question,” Andrew decided, stopping to face Neil behind the camera directly. “You are probably the only person who does have explicit consent from me to post private pictures and videos. Most everything else is reporters or fans feeling like they have a right to freely post footage and images of me without my permission because I am ‘well known’ and they think they have a claim to my private life.”

“You tell ‘em, babe,” Neil mocked with an amused smile. “Here you have it folks, I have permission to post these glimpses of our private life and everything else you see is bullshit.” Neil waited to see if Andrew had anything else to add, but he just poured the noodles into the fry pan with all the vegetables and chicken. Neil saved that video too, but before he could put his phone away to deal with later, Andrew spoke up.

“Go caption them and whatever now, so I don’t have to hear the repetitive loops when you do it before bed.”

“Okay, fine,” Neil agreed, sliding from his stool to move to the couch which would be far enough away to not be heard over Andrew’s music. “We still need a dining table, and it’s probably going to have to be a large one,” he said, crossing the empty space that separated the kitchen and the living space.

“I have been thinking about that, give me a couple more days and then we’ll talk about how to fill that space,” Andrew said, ever the cryptid. Neil didn’t particularly care what they filled it with, they usually ate dinner beside each other on the barstools or on the floor around the coffee table. He sat down and made himself comfortable to edit the videos and make sure there were voice filters, and he posted them one after the other, so that he didn’t have to think about it later. He double checked that notifications were off for the app, just like Twitter and Instagram. He went back to the kitchen as Andrew was serving the food into bowls and he quickly took a picture of his boyfriend to post to his Instagram. They’d been at the house for two and a half weeks and they still hadn’t shared that they had moved to a new house on social media. Fiona had nagged them again only a few hours into practice to sort it out.

“This is for your account, do you want me to caption this with a ‘new house with the boyfriend’ kind of thing, or just a ‘new house’ kind of thing?” Neil asked, showing Andrew the picture.

“Tell Fiona I hate her,” Andrew replied.

“I don’t want to do it either,” Neil promised him. He didn’t know why it was important to make the post, but if Fiona insisted, they didn’t really have much of a choice.

“Just caption it so you can eat,” Andrew replied, pushing a fork across the counter before following it around to the stool. Neil did as he asked and felt a little bit smug for using a meme, and he knew Dante and Oscar would text him soon to congratulate him for it. ‘Dinner for two every night now, finally home #newhousewhodis’.

“Thank you for cooking,” Neil said, climbing up into his stool and putting the phone away. Andrew made a noncommittal sound and went about using his fork to make all of the pieces smaller than they already were. Neil knew he wouldn’t eat until he’d fidgeted enough, but Neil wasn’t about to wait, and he shovelled a forkful into his mouth. It was a little bit spicy, and the lemongrass marinade was something Neil had never tried before, but he liked it and made a mental note to ask for this again next week.

*

Neil used TikTok a few more times that week, but he exercised extreme self-control and didn’t check his notifications page or any of the actual videos until Friday morning. They didn’t have training until Friday afternoon so the two of them were lying on the couch while Andrew played a video game and Neil had a fight with his old camera which seemed to have finally given up. They were feeling a little sluggish because they’d had McDonald’s for breakfast and the drizzly weather outside as they neared fall wasn’t boosting their energy levels. Neil gave up on his camera, knowing that the time was over for it, and turned his attention to the TikTok account. It was a very long list of notifications for the video replies, but more than that, people seemed to have started tagging the annoying_minyard account in other videos, challenges and trends to try and get Andrew to do. Neil reached for the drawer in the coffee table that held spare cords and earphones, untangling his old white ones and plugging them in to watch some of them. Most of them he knew Andrew wouldn't even pretend to be interested in, he wasn't about to learn a dance or stay still long enough for Neil to try his hand at a transition, but one piqued his interest just a little bit.

"Hey, handsome? When you get a break in the game can we try something?" Neil asked, waving his phone at Andrew to show him what it would entail. Andrew didn't respond, but after a couple minutes he completed the level and paused the game, turning his face to Neil who smiled in thanks. Neil put his socked feet on Andrew's lap and got comfortable, camera already open and sound loaded for him to record. "It's a 'put a finger down challenge', you put a finger down if you know the song," he explained. Andrew quirked an eyebrow, maybe in mild interest, maybe in annoyance. Neil knew Andrew liked music, he didn't play it very loud and he preferred wearing headphones and sitting alone when he listened, but apart from the odd playlist he played whilst making dinner or working out, Neil didn't really know what he listened to. However, Andrew's fans had tagged him in videos using this sound religiously for what appeared to be a week, so he wanted to try. "Are you ready?"

"Get on with it," Andrew sighed. Neil unplugged his headphones and pressed record and Andrew listened to the short intro telling him to do what Neil had already explained. Andrew made a 'get on with it' gesture before holding up five fingers, closing his eyes, and resting his head back against the back of the couch. The first song to play started with a singular note. Neil didn't think he'd ever be able to tell a song by the first, single note, but Andrew's head lifted immediately, and his eyes went wide, putting his pinkie finger down. Neil knew none of the songs, but he couldn't contain his smug grin as Andrew put all fingers down and grew increasingly more furrow browed as he listened.

"What was the point of that?" Andrew demanded when Neil put the camera away.

"I don't know, some of the fans wanted you to do it. They called it an 'emo phase test', if you knew most or all of the songs, you had an emo phase," Neil explained. Andrew made a face, but he looked embarrassed and tugged on the black earring in his earlobe.

"Fuck off," he moaned.

"So, you had an emo phase, huh? All the teasing actually had merit," Neil taunted, gently poking him in the ribs. Andrew flicked him an irritated look.

"I was an abused, gay, foster kid with the surname 'Doe' who comes in at five foot nothing, of course I listened to angsty, emo music," he said. Neil's heart tugged a little at his words, but he knew Andrew wouldn't want and didn't need sympathy. Instead he laughed quietly and crawled onto Andrew's lap, tangling his fingers in his hair as he kissed him gently.

"Did you ever dye your hair black?" Neil asked when he pulled back. Andrew shook Neil's fingers out of his hair and reached around to pull a lock of it into his line of sight.

"Could you imagine?" He asked. Neil tugged on the blonde lock and twirled it around his own fingers, taking it away from Andrew. He hadn’t thought about Andrew having anything other than his blonde hair, but now that he was looking, he could see different colours would suit him.

“Maybe not black, but you could do blue or even dark green,” he mused. “I’d say a pastel colour but I’m not in the mood to get pushed to the floor,” he added, grabbing onto Andrew’s shoulders pre-emptively with a grin. Andrew just rolled his eyes and pushed his hair back over his shoulder.

“I’m not going to dye my hair,” he said, but there was a small, amused smile on his mouth. “I did used to have a septum piercing though, I did it myself.”

“A what?” Neil asked, tilting his head to look at his ear piercings. He’d gotten most of them in his senior year or since he graduated, and he was pretty sure Andrew hadn’t had any when they met. Andrew shook his head at Neil’s curious look and Neil watched him press his index finger and thumb to the cartilage between his nostrils. “Here.”

“You had a nose piercing?” Neil asked, eyes going wide. “You did it yourself?” He put his hands on either side of Andrew’s face and angled his face back to try look at his nose, but Andrew pulled his head out of his grip and didn’t try to stop his laugh.

“Yes, I jabbed a needle through my own nose,” Andrew said. “I do not recommend it.”

“And you call me an idiot,” Neil taunted. Andrew made an unimpressed face and wrinkled his nose up at Neil which was cuter than he had any right to be, making Neil’s stomach roll over slowly and he leaned down to kiss him hard. Andrew smiled against his lips and put his arms around Neil’s waist. “Can you do something for me?” Neil asked when they pulled apart.

“What would that be?” Andrew asked.

“Will you caption the video? I don’t know any of the songs…” Neil asked, pinching his lips in the smile that made his cheeks dimple. Andrew still wielded when Neil prodded more often than not, but over the years Neil had learnt some other things that made Andrew feel anything. He liked it when Neil smiled like this and showed his dimples, it always helped if Neil wanted to do something that Andrew was on the fence about. Or if Andrew was being stubborn for the sake of being stubborn. Andrew rolled his eyes now and reached for the discarded phone, plugging the headphones in to caption the video with song titles and artists while Neil stayed on his lap watching. He wouldn’t tell Andrew, but he was trying to imagine him with a septum piercing.

“Staring,” Andrew commented.

“Waiting,” Neil shot back. Andrew, in response, unplugged and discarded the headphones and returned the phone to Neil with the video already uploaded. Neil sighed at the caption Andrew had used. ‘Andrew had to caption this because I am musically challenged #emochallenge #putafingerdown’. “You’re so mean!”

“It’s true though,” Andrew replied. “The first song, Welcome to the Black Parade by My Chemical Romance, I can play it on the piano.”

“What?” Neil asked, mouth dropping open. He hadn’t known Andrew could play piano. Why didn’t he know this? Why was that an extremely attractive quality?

“I can play the piano, and that was a song I taught myself when I was thirteen,” Andrew said. “Cass taught me the basics, but I can learn music by hearing it played first and then copying it.”

“Can we just revisit the fact that you can play the piano?” Neil asked. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I have not played since I was sixteen,” Andrew said. “In the aftermath of Tilda’s death, moving in with Nicky and the medication… I forgot it was something I enjoyed.”

“You played in juvie?” Neil asked, a little surprised. Andrew winced and held his hand up in a so-so movement.

“I did, sometimes. They had a piano in the recreation room and if I felt like dealing with shit from the other guys then yeah, I played. Luther and Maria had one in their house too, so I played a bit when I was forced to visit, but I haven’t played since.” He shrugged with one shoulder, but Neil could see that something was bugging him. He reached down and took Andrew’s hands in his, peering down at his fingers. They were long and slim, scarred from fighting and sparring without proper equipment, and from punching brick walls in college every time Kevin took something too far and Andrew had to remind him he would break his hands. They’d always looked to Neil like a player’s hands, a fighter’s hands, calloused and scarred, sometimes bruised, capable of extreme violence. He had never considered them to be a musician’s hands, but he could believe that it was true. Andrew let him bring his hands to his lips and Neil kissed the tips of his fingers because even though both of their hands were capable of disaster and damage, they were both capable of soft and tender things too.

“That’s what you’ve been thinking about recently,” Neil guessed, although it wasn’t a question because he knew it was true. “The space in the dining room, you want to get a piano.”

“I think so,” Andrew said. “A table to seat four instead of eight, and a piano.”

“Okay,” Neil agreed, excitement snapping to attention in his stomach. He wanted to hear Andrew play. “Can we go now?”

“Now?” Andrew repeated.

“Yeah, I need a new camera, you need a piano, both a music and camera store were near where we bought the fridge!”

“And an Excites,” Andrew said, but he didn’t sound thrilled about that. Neil grinned.

“Doesn’t hurt,” he said. Andrew took a deep breath in through his nose and let it out of his mouth, eyes narrowed as he looked up at Neil.

“Okay, fine. Now works,” he agreed. Neil leapt from Andrew’s lap and danced around the house changing into jeans and sneakers while Andrew moved a lot slower. When Andrew went upstairs to change out of his sweatpants, Neil received a very sternly worded text message from Fiona reminding him that he _needed to post a new house status now_ or she would do it for him. Tacked on the end was a note that the @annoying­_minyard TikTok account was verified. He sat on the floor in the space they were about to occupy with a piano and took a picture of his legs stretched out along the floor for Instagram. ‘No one told me how hard it was to fill up the spaces in a new house. Anyway, I’m in Chicago and I’m here to stay #Lions.’

“You ready to go?” Neil asked, as Andrew came downstairs.

“Ready,” Andrew agreed, jingling his keys in his pocket. Neil held his arms out and Andrew made an unimpressed noise but took Neil’s hands in both of his and pulled him up in one fell swoop.


	31. "I'm Not Paying Attention."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More TikTok shenanigans and piano related angst

Neil was feeling antsy and excited about the piano being delivered that day. It had been four days since they’d purchased and organised it to be delivered - well Andrew organised it - Neil was feeling more and more anxious to hear Andrew play. He’d been more than a little disappointed when he realised that they couldn’t bring the piano home themselves on Friday, but he should have realised that they wouldn’t fit an upright piano in the back of the Maserati.   
As he fidgeted, sprawled out on the floor in the soon to be dining-music space, he pulled his phone out to watch TikToks, deciding his friends and Exy filled feed was a viable distraction. He’d looked at some of the comments on the ‘emo challenge’ video, but he hadn’t paid much attention and clicked onto it now just to see if there was anything new of note, which there wasn’t. He went back to the endless stream of videos and tried to pay attention to the content. Over the past couple of days, he’d noticed some videos that weren’t strictly Exy related had filtered into his feed. Robin said it was the TikTok algorithm, but Neil didn’t really know how it had decided to start showing him gay couple videos when he didn’t press like on or watch any. He supposed it could be because of the content he had posted himself, but it wasn’t something he was actively seeking out. That didn’t stop him from noticing a trend surfacing where you call out your partner’s name as if you’re angry at them and then say ‘I love you’ when they appear. He hadn’t been planning to do it, but as he scrolled, he received a tag notification from Oscar and when he clicked the notification it dragged him to Dante’s account. Jaiden was calling out for Oscar while Dante filmed, and Oscar walked in looking incredibly sad and worried until Jaiden jumped on him and said that the pair of them loved him while Dante called his agreement from behind the camera. The tag was attached to a comment that simply said, ‘Do this to Andrew if you dare.’ Neil was being faced with a challenge, and he was filled with enough nervous energy to accept it. He rose to his feet as he clicked open to the filming page, turning to face the stairs so he could yell up at where Andrew was on the floor above.   
“Oscar, if I die, this is your fault,” Neil said after pressing record. “Although there is a ninety percent chance Andrew just ignores me because he doesn’t respond to yelling,” he added as an afterthought, realising that this entire endeavour could be uneventful.   
“Andrew! Andrew Minyard!” He yelled up the stairs. “Andrew come here! Andrew!” He tried to sound annoyed more so than angry because he didn’t think it would be fair on Andrew if he thought Neil was actually angry at him. Being annoyed was much more commonplace for the pair of them. He waited a good ten seconds and when there was no response, he huffed a laugh.   
“Told you so, he doesn’t respond to yelling,” Neil said for the camera before turning away from the stairs. He honest to God cried out in fright when he saw Andrew standing in the living room behind him with his arms folded and a supremely unimpressed look on his face.   
“Fuck, Drew, what the fuck are you doing over there?” He demanded, swallowing his heart back down to his chest.

“You were yelling for me,” Andrew answered, stating the obvious.

“I thought you were upstairs,” Neil grumbled. Andrew, wearing workout clothes and covered in a thin layer of sweat, rolled his eyes.

“Clearly,” he replied. “You have to post that, scream and all,” he added, pointing at the phone before walking back down the hall to their home gym.

“I didn’t scream,” he muttered before turning the camera off. He sat down on the floor again, wondering how many years of his life he’d just lost with that fright, and captioned the video, layered the voice effect over the top and published it, tagging Oscar in the caption. The video had only just uploaded when their doorbell rang, and Neil jumped to his feet so fast his head spun, which didn’t slow him down as he raced for the door.   
“Piano?” Neil asked when he threw the door open. Not exactly an eloquent greeting and behind him, Andrew snorted. The pristine black upright piano was on a moving trolley and covered in dust covers and protective materials, the bench held between two men behind it.

“Ah, yes, is this Mr. Minyard’s house?” The delivery man asked, giving Neil a strange look.

“It is, I’m just here to be annoying,” Neil replied, only half joking. He stepped aside and the first man went to the handle of the trolley and pushed it over the threshold, the men carrying the bench following behind. Andrew pointed out where to put it and then stepped back as the men unwrapped it. Before they left, Andrew had to sign the delivery sheet and with a second strange look at Neil, the trio of men left. Neil locked the door behind them and when he turned back to face Andrew, he found the blonde hadn’t moved, staring at the shiny new addition to their home.   
“Hey, love?” Neil called, not wanting to interrupt whatever processing he was doing, but also needing to check he was okay.

“Did you hear we hate each other still?” He asked, not blinking. Neil frowned and went across to him, standing at his side without touching.

“Is that really what you want to be talking about right now?” Neil said quietly.

“I heard it on the radio this morning, on my way home from the supermarket,” he said as if Neil hadn’t spoken.

“What did you hear?” Neil asked, deciding it would be better to let Andrew control the conversation for a minute.

“Someone was being interviewed, some Exy commentator or whatever. He was just dissecting every interaction we’ve had on camera since I went pro. The guy wasn’t a psychologist, so he had no business talking about body language and linguistic patterns, but it sounded convincing enough.”

“Are you bothered?” Neil asked.

“Not so much bothered,” Andrew said slowly, finally blinking and glancing at Neil beside him. “I think I am finally dumbfounded by this rivalry.”

“Oh yeah, how so?” Neil asked with an amused smile. Andrew sighed, shaking his head as he put his arm around Neil’s waist.

“We have bought a house together, we have had numerous delivery people recognise us, we have arrived and left the Lion’s Den together nearly every day for a month now, we haven’t criticised each other online for months, Matt and Dan have announced us the _godfathers of their daughter,_ and I have told the world that I’m gay, and people still think we hate each other,” he said, looking and sounding incredulous. Dan had posted a picture of Holly asleep, one fist around Andrew’s long, slim finger and the other around Neil’s own index finger, riddled with burn scars as it was. ‘Our baby girl already knows she can reach out to her godparents if she needs them. We know you will protect her with everything you have @josten10 @aminyard03’ was the accompanying caption. Neil hadn’t expected the riotous response. The fraction of the fans who believed with their souls (correctly) that they weren’t enemies went feral, as did the even smaller fraction who undoubtedly claimed they were dating. Yet, the majority of the Exy followers said that it was only because Matt chose Neil and Dan trusted Andrew that they were given the title. They argued that you don’t have to be in a relationship to be made the godparents, and you didn’t have to like each other to put a child’s life before your issues. Obviously, neither Dan nor Matt made any comment about it, and Neil and Andrew had nothing they cared to share publicly, and the flame had dwindled.

“Do you want to tell people about us?” Neil asked, leaning some of his weight against Andrew who hummed quietly in response.

“No, it’s nobody’s business. Let them piece it together themselves. I just don’t understand it anymore,” he admitted. Neil kissed his temple and pulled away from his sticky embrace.

“Okay, I agree, but I never understood,” Neil told him. “You need a shower.”

“I know, I know,” Andrew waved him away and turned his back on the piano. Neil let the disappointment register in his body and then leave again. As much as he wanted to hear Andrew play, he knew this went a lot deeper than he could really understand. Andrew walked away and Neil watched him go before crossing to the couch to re-watch the Fox’s last game.

*

After three days, Neil started to give up hope that Andrew would even acknowledge the piano in their home. Andrew hadn’t even looked at it since its delivery on Tuesday, just moved past it as if it wasn’t there. Well, besides the fact that every night Neil had woken up to Andrew climbing from the bed and leaving the room. Neil had followed him the second night and watched for a moment as Andrew sat down on the bench behind the piano and just rested his head on his crossed arms across the lid covering the keys. He didn’t play, he didn’t open it, he just leaned there in the dark. Neil didn’t know what war Andrew was battling inside himself, but he could see that something dark and heavy was trying to crawl its way up Andrew’s throat and take over. What was surprising was how in control Andrew seemed. Neil had seen Andrew trip and teeter on his childhood more than once and every time it happened, he lashed out with aggravated words. Neil knew Andrew had never been taught how to communicate his feelings when things were hurting or scary, or maybe he had, but he’d never been listened to. In return, Andrew had learnt to get angry and hit first, deal with it later. Not once this week has Andrew snapped at him. No ‘I hate you’ when Neil asked if he was okay. No ‘fuck off’ when Neil tried to talk about the piano. Not once did Andrew threaten to hit him, kill him, or push him down the stairs when Neil toed the lines between prying and concern. Instead, Andrew just asked him to walk away, not touch him, let it go. It may not have been polite, and he definitely sounded unhappy, but the words had changed and that was something worth noticing. Neil had a feeling something about the day he’d been called out for threatening abuse had hit somewhere deep inside Andrew, and if he’d spoken to his therapist (or Betsy) about it since, then maybe he was making a conscious effort to make his feelings known without being aggressive about it. Neil also knew it was just for him. He’d heard Andrew tell Aaron he would cut his ‘fucking legs off’ on the phone yesterday and Neil still didn’t know what the other Minyard had said.

“Hey, Andrew just got home, I’ll talk to you later,” Neil said into his phone. He was lying on their couch with a cartoon about dragons playing in the background while he talked to Lulu on the phone. She’d rung him in tears just as he got home, alone, from training, needing to talk about some of the more brutal things Harmony had done recently. Harmony had never gotten this deep under her skin before, and Neil was itching to fight Harmony face to face, but he’d just listen to Lulu rant and cry until she felt better and then they’d talked about the upcoming season and how much fun it was going to be to play against each other for the first game of the season.

“Okay, thanks for listening to me,” she said in a singsong voice.

“Anytime,” he promised before the line disconnected.

“Hey,” Andrew said, face appearing above Neil.

“Hello, how was dinner with Liv?” Neil asked. Andrew leaned down and kissed Neil, as upside down as they were, before answering.

“It was good. Rosie’s kids came out to show us their grades before we ate and Olivia drew them pictures of flowers to colour in while we waited for the food,” Andrew answered. Andrew had maintained his relationship with the restaurant owners closer to the middle of the city and even though their daughter was heading to junior high next year, Andrew had agreed to help her with her English homework once a week.

“Sounds nice,” Neil said. “I was just on the phone to Lulu. Harmony has crossed the last line, but I don’t know what to do about it.”

“Could you take her in a fight?” Andrew asked over his shoulder as he walked back towards the kitchen. Neil sat up and leaned on the back of the couch so that they could continue the conversation.

“Maybe, if I had the element of surprise. Do you really think I should try?” He asked. Andrew took a pint of ice cream from Rosie’s restaurant out of a plastic bag and rustled around in the freezer to make room for it.

“Maybe not, but it is something to consider,” he answered when he resurfaced. “Isn’t Harmony the striker who watched Dan punch her friend in the dick with her shoes at your first banquet?”

“Yeah, that’s her,” Neil confirmed. “Her attitude hasn’t improved over the years.”

“No, appears not,” he agreed. “I’m going to read in bed, are you coming?”

“Nah, not yet. I’ll be up in a bit,” Neil answered.

“Okay, don’t forget to lock the doors,” Andrew said.

“Wait!” Neil called out as Andrew reached the stairs and the blonde turned to look at him with an eyebrow raised. Neil smiled and did the grabby hands that he knew Andrew hated and loved in equal measure.

“You suck,” Andrew sighed, but he crossed to stand at the back of the couch and face Neil with a small smile. Neil smiled back, sighing in contentment as he put his hands around the back of Andrew’s neck and pressed their lips together. Andrew kept one hand on the back of the couch and put the other under Neil’s shirt to rest on the scars around his ribs. Neil bit down on Andrew’s lip gently before pulling away and sinking off his knees to sit down properly.

“That was all, be up later,” he said with a grin. Andrew shook his head, but he didn’t hide his fondness with an eye roll. Instead he just smiled and turned back towards the stairs and their bedroom. Neil didn’t know what it was, but something had settled inside Andrew over the past day. Part of his restless and agitated soul had calmed down and found its home. Andrew hadn’t tried very hard to hide his feelings from Neil for a long time, but it was entirely different to see him smile so easily at Neil’s antics. Not a small, barely-there smile, but a proper smile. Neil put his fingers to his lips and smiled up at the ceiling. Whatever it was that Andrew was battling with the appearance of the piano, it was helping him find some sort of peace and understanding and Neil was glad to see it, for Andrew’s benefit more than anything.   
It didn’t take long for Neil’s attention to start wandering and he found himself opening up TikTok, an idle habit he wasn’t proud to have, and with one hand he turned off the TV and with the other he looked at his notifications. The account had been tagged in an obscene number of videos, pleading with him to ask Andrew to do it, but he ignored them in favour of looking for the ones their friends and family had tagged him in. He saw that Aaron, of all people, had tagged him in something which was suspicious enough, but Neil couldn’t help but be curious too. ‘Andrew would knock you tf out if you tried this, maybe you should give it a go @annoying_minyard’ was the comment. The video was on one of Carly’s newer videos, which Neil assumed Aaron followed because Carly and Katelyn had become friends at the pre-Championship party. Carly had the camera in selfie mode and was sitting on McKenna’s lap just lavishing him in compliments. McKenna in return had his face hidden against her neck and you could see a blush creeping up his neck as he listened to his girlfriend. Neil knew Aaron wasn’t actually expecting him to do it and that it was just an excuse to make a half-hearted dig at Neil when the opportunity presented itself, but now that the idea was in his mind, Neil wasn’t sure he wanted to get rid of it. He’d never really showered Andrew with compliment after compliment before while he was sober or doing so intentionally, and Aaron was right because it could very easily end with Neil being shut down. There was also a possibility that Andrew would like it. He replied to Aaron’s comment with a very simple, ‘Bet?’ and then went and checked all the doors were locked. He stood at the bottom of the stairs, camera pointed up and pressed record.   
“Am I about to get told to shut the fuck up? Most likely. Is that going to stop me? It probably should, but here we go,” he said before he paused filming and climbed the stairs. Andrew was lying on top of the covers in the black hoodie he had been slowly trying to repossess since they moved in together and his glasses were on his nose as he read a book. He looked up when Neil walked in and immediately eyed the phone.

“God, now what?” He asked.

“I want to film something, would that be okay?”

“Do I have to do anything?”

“Just, react I guess? Say stop and I stop,” Neil answered. Andrew huffed a laugh at Neil’s words and nodded his head. Neil smiled and pressed record on the camera again, climbing onto the bed as he spoke.   
“Hey, handsome, have I ever told you how cute you are with your glasses and your messy hair when you’re reading?” He asked. Andrew lifted his eyebrow and not-subtly slipped lower in the bed as Neil settled his legs on either side of Andrew’s hips, camera angled down at him. “You have the nicest smile and it’s so sad that not many people get to see it, but I am the luckiest man in the world because I see it every day.”

“What are you doing?” Andrew asked, lifting an eyebrow as Neil smirked down at him.

“Your eyes are really beautiful, have I ever told you that? And your freckles are like little stars, when you sleep you scrunch up your nose and it is the cutest thing I have ever seen you do.” Neil wasn’t sure where the words were coming from, they weren’t coherent thoughts he’d ever tried to articulate, but as he searched for compliments, he found they weren’t hard to find.   
“You are an Exy legend, but you’re also just an inspirational icon to so many people in the world. You are too smart for your own good, and you are the funniest person I have ever met.” Neil’s smile grew when he saw a blush start to creep up Andrew’s cheeks and he covered his eyes with the crook of his elbow so that he wasn’t looking up at Neil anymore.   
“You’re an amazing cook, a terrible driver, and you’re so strong. I’m pretty sure I’d be lost without you holding me up when I need you.”

“No more compliments,” Andrew said. There were pink spots of colour high on his cheekbones and a soft, embarrassed smile on his face that Neil felt a little proud to be the reason of.

“No more compliments, but I’m still filming,” Neil told him. Andrew poked his tongue out, eyes still hidden behind his arm. It was a silly expression, almost childish, and Neil felt his heart swell at seeing something so innocent and _happy_ on his face. “You’re really out here ruining your own badass reputation,” he teased. In response, Andrew growled, deep in his throat and the smile fell from his face as he pushed his lips into a scowl. Neil knew it was for show, and he had an idea on just how to get the smile back.   
“Ah yes, scary, scary,” he said. “Although that did sound like a cat’s purr,” he added. Andrew moved faster than Neil had expected, and he barely had time to react as Andrew hooked his leg around Neil’s and flipped him onto his back, holding him down with his bodyweight. It was a miracle Neil managed to keep hold of the phone and he laughed up at him.

“Scary, scary,” Andrew said.

“In your dreams,” Neil replied just as the sixty second recording ended. Neil locked the screen and tossed the phone away somewhere on the bed and hooked his arms around the back of Andrew’s neck, bringing him down to meet his mouth. Andrew hummed into the kiss as he wriggled his way to lie down on top of Neil, holding him close and supporting his weight so he didn’t get too heavy on top. Neil knocked Andrew’s elbow out from under him and he collapsed his weight on top of Neil with a grunt. Neil smiled and wrapped his legs around his body to keep him there. Andrew took it in stride and deepened the kiss, one hand in Neil’s hair and the other interlacing with Neil’s fingers on the pillow above his head.

*

When Neil got home from his run on Saturday morning, Andrew was lying on the kitchen tiles drenched in sweat and eyes closed. Andrew had already left for the gym when Neil woke up, so Neil guessed he’d worked out with Jackson for a couple of hours that morning.   
“Let me know now if I need to start organising your funeral,” Neil said, peering down at him. Andrew held up his middle finger, which wasn’t quite reaction enough, so Neil tempted fate and tipped his water bottle to make water dribble on Andrew’s face. Andrew groaned and sat up to glare at him, but Neil just smiled down at his boyfriend. “Had fun with Jackson I see,” he mused.

“He played dirty,” Andrew grumbled. Neil saw a bruise spreading along Andrew’s jaw now that he was sitting up and frowned.

“He got your face,” he observed.

“He did,” Andrew agreed. “That was my oversight though,” he added when he saw the look on Neil’s face. Neil believed him, but he still didn’t like it.

“Why haven’t you iced it or showered?” Neil asked.

“I was waiting for you,” Andrew answered, unapologetic as always. Neil rolled his eyes and went to the freezer to find ice, but Andrew grabbed the waistband of his running shorts. “Forget the ice, it’s going to bruise regardless. Just shower,” he said. Neil scowled at him, but nodded his agreement, knowing it was futile to try and change Andrew’s mind.

After the shower and a midmorning breakfast, Neil settled down on the couch with an Exy streaming site so that he could watch some of the Scorpion games from last year. He wanted to see them from the outside, so he knew what to prepare for when they went head to head with his first team on the first game of the next pro season. Andrew sat down on a cushion in front of the coffee table to repaint his nails and studiously ignore the game on the TV as the room filled with the smell of nail polish remover.   
“I will score on you one day,” Neil muttered as the game between the Scorpions and the Lions rolled on. Andrew snorted, but didn’t reply otherwise. Neil reached for his phone, more out of habit now than necessity, which was not something he wanted to talk about, and clicked on the TikTok app to read some comments while the game lulled onscreen. Neil had watched the game every weekend for two months, he knew when it was worth paying attention to or not. ‘What are you doing right now as you read this comment?’ was one of the newer comments on yesterday’s compliment video, which was actually kind of refreshing after pages and pages of cooing and gooey comments. He clicked on it to video reply and aimed the camera at Andrew.   
“I’m going to film,” he warned. Andrew nodded once in acknowledgement, so Neil pressed record. “Currently, I am re-watching the Scorpion’s versus Lion’s game from last season while Andrew pretends that he isn’t paying attention.”

“I’m not paying attention,” Andrew said, untwisting the black nail polish bottle and flattening his hand on the table to paint it.

“You are a little bit,” Neil said.

“No, because I do not give a fuck,” Andrew replied. Neil smiled and ended the recording. He tried not to jostle Andrew too much as he reached for headphones so he could edit and caption the video without being too annoying with the looping sound.

A little while later, as the game onscreen neared the altercation with Harmony, Andrew seemed satisfied that his nails were dry and moved to sit on the couch with Neil’s legs across his lap. Neil watched him for a moment, eyes tracking his face and examining the bruise on his jaw that looked like it had hurt.   
“It doesn’t hurt, stop looking at me like that,” Andrew said without looking away from the screen. Neil sighed, still wanting to fetch ice so that he could look after the injury, and turned his attention to the idle phone in his hands instead. “Has anyone asked why you’re watching the Scorpion match?” Andrew wondered. Neil looked up to see Andrew had followed his gaze to the phone.

“Don’t know,” Neil answered, turning the phone on to check. The answer was yes. A lot of people. They all wanted to know why he would be watching his boyfriend’s rival play, seeming to ignore the fact that it was also Andrew’s game that he was watching. “Uh, yep. Pretty much everyone.”

“Are you going to respond?” Andrew asked. Neil was surprised by the question and nudged his thigh with his socked toes.

“Why should I?” He asked.

“You don’t have to, I was just wondering if you would,” Andrew replied, looking bored enough of the conversation. Neil considered that for a moment, slowly scrolling through the comments before finding one that he could work with without outright saying he was Neil Josten. He set up the video response and aimed the camera at the TV where the onscreen past version of himself was racing towards Harmony after she attacked Andrew.

“Why am I watching this particular game? Because the Lion’s first game of the season is against the Scorpions and I wanted _someone,”_ he panned the camera to Andrew, “to watch it and take notes.”

“I couldn’t care less,” Andrew replied with a flippant wave of his hand.

“And to answer the second part of your question, what do I think of Neil Josten?” He grinned behind the camera as Andrew lolled his head to the side to shoot him an unimpressed look. “He’s kind of an asshole, and he definitely has an attitude problem, but I don’t hate him. The rivalry is of endless amusement for me.”

“You done?” Andrew asked. Neil scrunched his nose up at him and smiled.

“Do you have anything to add regarding former Scorpion striker, Neil Josten?” Neil asked, trying to sound innocent. Andrew was not amused and sighed loudly out of his nose.

“He’s a pain in the ass,” Andrew said.

“You’re just dramatic,” Neil said with a laugh. Andrew shrugged and turned his attention back to the screen in a silent bid for the video to be over. Neil stopped recording and crawled across the couch to sit on his legs while he edited the video and posted it, Andrew’s face pressed against his shoulder andhe held Neil tight around the waist.


	32. "I Want To Play."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Idk I feel like writing the summary for this might spoil it, but also it made my beta reader cry so... :')

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your comments and messages, I am glad you are enjoying this fic!! 
> 
> To those of you who have fallen in love with Oscar, Jaiden and Dante, please put in the comments below a ship name for them because I don't have one in mind :')   
> I will eventually write a little story for them so follow me on Tumblr (@andrew-is-foxy) for when that happens!
> 
> Super short update, but still important!

Neil felt the mattress dip and move as Andrew climbed from the bed Saturday night. He hadn’t quite been asleep yet, although it was a near thing, and he rolled onto his back so that he could watch Andrew leave the bedroom. He knew Andrew was going down to the piano to sit and contemplate his life choices or his childhood or the meaning of life or whatever it was that he had been doing since Tuesday. Neil had followed him just once, deciding to let him go through it on his own, but when he glanced at the time glowing on the alarm clock, he saw that it was earlier tonight than the other nights. The fact that something had changed drew Neil’s curiosity to the surface and he slid from the bed and followed Andrew. He crept quietly, not wanting to disturb Andrew too much, and when he got downstairs, he wasn’t surprised to see him sitting on the bench with his forehead resting his crossed arms on the lid over the keys. Neil’s heart was aching as he watched. Andrew looked so small sitting on the bench, his toes resting on the pedals and his shoulders hunched up as if he was trying not to curl in on himself. Neil realised, with a sickening wave of sadness, that Andrew was grieving. He was grieving what could have been, or would have been, if he’d been able to stay with Cass or if Drake hadn’t been a monster. He was grieving for the years he’d lost, the time he’d gone without playing, and the mom he should have been allowed to keep. For a brief moment, Neil considered ringing Betsy, but it was a little after midnight and he didn’t think hearing the voice of his surrogate maternal figure would help him miss Cass any less right now. Neil couldn’t decide if he should make his presence known, go back upstairs and pretend he hadn’t seen, or just wait and see what happens next. He didn’t get the chance to make the decision though.  
“Staring,” came Andrew’s muffled voice. Neil smiled at the familiarity and moved to Andrew’s side on quiet feet.

“Can I sit?” Neil asked quietly. Andrew shuffled a little to the left so that Neil could sit down, but Neil wasn’t going to sit until he had express permission to enter his space right now.

“Yes,” Andrew said after a moment, turning his head where it rested on his arms so that he could look up at him. Neil sat down next to him; the bench small enough that they were touching from hip to knee. Neil didn’t say anything, just content to share his space with Andrew in the dark, the only real light being the moon coming through the slatted blinds over the window in front of them. He watched Andrew, who watched him right back with his head down, sucking on his lower lip and brow a little furrowed as he lost himself to his thoughts. In this light, Andrew was so pale Neil was surprised he couldn’t see the blood rushing through his veins, his hair silvery instead of gold.   
After what felt like an eternity but was no more than half an hour of quiet contemplation, Andrew sat up and put his hands on the lid of the piano, bit down hard on his lip, and lifted it up. Neil held his breath as he watched and waited, and when he let it out slowly before his chest could start to hurt, Andrew looked at him again.  
“I want to play,” he said quietly.

“Then play,” Neil replied, his voice just as quiet. Neil didn’t know why Andrew needed permission, why he needed to be told it was okay to play, but he could see it written across his vulnerable expression. “You can play now,” he promised. Andrew swallowed visibly and turned to face the piano again, putting his hands on the keys. He hesitated again for just a moment before he pressed down. They both flinched as the noise ricocheted around their house, but when the sound died down again, Andrew moved his hands and pressed down on another key, and then another, and another, until he was playing a tune. It took Neil a moment to recognise it as the song from the start of the challenge he’d filmed. _Welcome to the Black Parade_ by My Chemical Romance. Neil didn’t know the song outside of the brief part he’d heard a week ago, but it sounded melancholic and as it grew faster in tempo, he watched Andrew’s black polished fingers move fast and precise across the keys.  
When the song was finished, Andrew snatched his hands away and put them in his lap, turning his face to look at Neil. He was breathing hard, like maybe he’d run a marathon, and his eyes were shiny with unshed tears, but he smiled. Neil smiled back and kissed the corner of his mouth softly.   
“You’re amazing,” he whispered before pulling back. Andrew chased his words with another kiss before taking a deep breath and relaxing his shoulders.

“I’m going to play one more, and then we are going back to bed,” he said seriously. Neil nodded in encouragement and waited as Andrew moved his fingers back to place. He started playing and after only a few seconds, Neil recognised the song. His heart threatened to crawl out of his throat as memories fogged his mind. Memories of his mom, the two of them with one very old, worn out mixed CD that she’d bought with her and played for her young son on the longest of drives when she felt a little safer, a little happier. Neil remembered the sunlight, the wind in their hair as they drove a car that was too old for air-conditioning in the middle of summer. He remembered her singing along, one of the few beautiful things she’d allowed them to keep, her voice. Neil hadn’t quite been gifted with the ability to sing like a trained professional, but he knew this song inside and out and back to front. When he started singing as Andrew finished the intro, his boyfriend didn’t falter or pause, he just sent Neil a curious look out of the corner of his eye.

_“When the night has come  
And the land is dark  
And the moon is the only light we'll see  
No I won't be afraid  
Oh, I won't be afraid  
Just as long as you stand, stand by me_

_So darling, darling  
Stand by me, oh stand by me  
Oh stand, stand by me  
Stand by me_

_If the sky that we look upon  
Should tumble and fall  
Or the mountain should crumble to the sea  
I won't cry, I won't cry  
No, I won't shed a tear  
Just as long as you stand, stand by me…” _

Andrew played the song to completion and Neil wiped his eye with palm of his hand before any real tears could form, but he felt a sense of peace spreading behind his ribs. Andrew closed the lid of the piano and turned the best he could on the small bench seat. Neil felt the weight of his hand on the back of his neck and met his curious gaze.

“You know Stand By Me,” he noted. Neil nodded his head and put his forehead to Andrew’s.

“It was one of my mom’s favourite songs,” he said.

“Cass’s too,” Andrew murmured. Neil smiled and put his hand on Andrew’s cheek, eyes dropping closed. He could feel Andrew’s pulse against his pinkie finger, their steady breaths mingling between them as they sat like that. He could almost feel the ghosts of their childhoods watching them. Two men sharing the only thing left to share, the secrets they guarded closest to their heart. They didn’t need to speak, to say what it had been like to sing with Mary or play piano with Cass, they knew. They didn’t swallow their pain, they let themselves feel it, and more importantly they let the other feel it.

“If you could, what would you say to younger you? The you who learnt to play the piano?” Neil asked, pulling back to look into Andrew’s face. The blonde didn’t seem to like the question, frowning at Neil with his lips pursed, and Neil waited more for a few minutes before accepting he wasn’t going to get an answer. Andrew’s shoulders drooped a little and he sighed.

“I think… I don’t really think there is anything I could say to ten-year-old me that would make any of it better,” he said at last, his voice small and sad. Neil watched Andrew put his hands over his scarred, bare forearms, a frown tugging between his eyes. “Maybe, maybe I would tell me not to do this. I know I told myself it was keeping me alive, destroy myself to keep my silence and not destroy Cass but… of all the pain I’ve been through, I didn’t deserve the pain I inflicted on myself the most.”

“The fact that you can acknowledge that you didn’t deserve some of your pain is a big thing, Drew,” Neil said quietly and pressed a kiss to his temple. His throat felt constricted with emotions, grateful that Andrew could at least see that. Andrew had suffered with his own guilt and blame for as long as Neil knew, and as angry as Andrew may have been at the adults in his life who let him down, he’d internalised so much of his pain and blame that Neil knew it had taken him years and years to separate the two.

“Oh,” Andrew said, turning to face Neil again. “I’d tell myself about the autism too. That might have been a little easier to deal with if I was ten and not twenty when I learnt about it.”

“You’ve dealt with it pretty well,” Neil commented. Andrew shrugged with one shoulder, but his lip curled a small amount.

“What would you tell yourself? Little Nathaniel Wesninski on the run,” he asked. Neil didn’t flinch at the name, but he didn’t like hearing it either. It was a good question though, what would he be able to tell himself when he was eight that would make the next ten, or even eleven, years of his life easier to bear? He remembered all the nights he’d lay beside his mom, terrified and lost, no idea where in the world he really was, but knowing he wouldn’t be there very long. It had taken him a year or so to learn that there really was no going back, that this was his life until he died and there was a very real possibility that that could happen any day at any time.

“For years, before I realised that I didn’t want to go back to Baltimore, I had this kind of chant in my head when I went to sleep. ‘My name is Nathaniel Wesninski. I will not die tomorrow. My name is Nathaniel Wesninski. I will not die tomorrow.’ And I think if I could go back, I would give myself a new chant.”

“What would it be?” Andrew’s voice was a whisper, like Neil’s had been, and when Neil felt his hand on his own, he held on.

“I would tell myself, ‘I will be Neil Josten. One day I will stop running.’ I think I needed to hear that,” Neil told him. Andrew nodded his head, and after a moment of deliberation, he put his head on Neil’s shoulder and muffled his yawn into his shirt.

“I think I would tell myself about you too,” Andrew decided. Neil smiled and looked down at his sleepy face.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I’d tell my dumb ass to talk Kevin out of recruiting you from Millport,” he said. Neil laughed and let go of his hand so he could wrap his arm around his shoulder.

“Maybe I should tell myself to run in the opposite direction of the crazy man with a racquet,” Neil agreed. “Come on, let’s go back to bed.”

“Yes,” Andrew agreed, getting to his feet and tugging Neil up after him. They walked hand in hand back to their room, and when they climbed into bed, Andrew pulled Neil onto his chest. Neil smiled sat up and yanked on Andrew’s pyjama top until he pulled it off and then lay against his bare skin with the blanket pulled up to his neck. Andrew put his hand under the back of Neil’s own sleep shirt, his palm warm against his lower back. Neil let his eyes close and muffled his yawn against Andrew’s shoulder.

“I probably would tell myself about you,” Neil murmured. Andrew hummed in curiosity, sounding already half asleep. “I would say, ‘wait for the boy who gives you a key and calls it home. I promise you; he means it. And above all, he’s worth it.’”

“Go to sleep, baby,” Andrew muttered, but Neil had felt Andrew’s heartbeat skip under his palm when he spoke and that meant more than either of them would be able to say.


	33. "Already Been Adopted, Sorry."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We finally have the fur babies!!!!!!!   
> Well we (re)meet them, they get picked up next chapter lol sorry :')

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter has been written and is with my beta reader, but I only finished it like ten minutes ago so after that's posted you will be caught up to what I've written. This means that finally, and unfortunately, there will be no more daily updates... I feel bad, I know how much you've all loved the daily updates. I do promise to update as frequently as I can though, and it should be at the bare minimum once a week. 
> 
> I will also be posting a few shorter fics as well because I have few ideas I've put on hold to write this, but I don't want to put them on hold anymore. If you like the way I write, don't forget to subscribe to me so you can see when I post! 
> 
> Thank you all, as usual, for being amazing <3

Andrew had woken up when Neil rose for his run, but he had promptly fallen back to sleep stretched out across the mattress before the front door was even closed. He didn’t have a session with Jackson that day, nor did the team have training even though it was a Wednesday, and Andrew was extremely happy to take advantage of another hour or two of sleep.

He woke up again when Neil jumped on him a few hours later, all knees and elbows and damp hair.   
“Get off, you’re going to get sweat all over the bed,” Andrew groaned, trying to push him off, but not awake enough to manage it.

“No, I showered downstairs, it’s just water,” Neil said, shaking his hair out so that the water fell from his curls and landed on Andrew’s face. He groaned again and wiped his face on Neil’s tee shirt. “Your wake-up reflexes are getting worse,” Neil noted. Andrew felt himself freeze and then slowly pulled his face away from his shoulder and looked up into Neil’s face. There was a small, knowing smile there and he let Neil kiss him softly. Andrew hadn’t thought about it, his less violent wakeups, or the reason why, but he had noticed too. With Neil’s full weight on him having woken him up in a less than gentle or graceful way, Andrew should have woken up throwing fists, bordering on panic and anger. Instead he’d been sluggish and petty about sweat getting on their sheets. He felt safe here in his home and waking up with Neil every day had become a part of his routine, he expected to be woken up by him or with him, it didn’t trigger his panic responses anymore.

“You’re just not scary,” Andrew muttered. Neil laughed and pulled himself up, sitting with his knees on either side of Andrew’s hips, hands flat on Andrew’s stomach under the hem of his sleep shirt. Neil had so much energy, so much adrenaline and all of the endorphins after his run and sometimes he used Andrew as a conduit for all that.

“I can be scary,” Neil promised. Andrew quirked his eyebrow and yawned loudly, arching his spine to try and stretch it out. He nearly choked when Neil put his finger in his mouth, laughing despite the fact that he had to yank his hand back before Andrew could bite down hard.

“Fuck, you’re annoying,” Andrew complained. Neil shrugged and rolled off him to his side and got comfortable with his head on his shoulder. Andrew shook his head and put his fingers in Neil’s wet hair, kissing the top of his head gently.

“You ready for the shoot today?” Neil asked, tilting his head to look up at Andrew who was yawning yet again, undisturbed this time. The training session had been cancelled for the day because some of the Lions were going to a local animal rescue for pictures and recorded interviews to encourage ‘adopt don’t shop’ and gain attention for the rescue centre.

“Ready to not have to train today,” Andrew answered.

“Don’t get too excited, Kevin might drag you with us to the rec centre tonight,” Neil warned. Andrew sighed and closed his eyes, already not looking forward to that conversation later. Kevin and Thea were flying into Chicago that afternoon and staying with them for a couple of days. Kevin hadn’t really gone into any details about what they were doing in Chicago, but he’d sounded worried and mentioned visiting a medical specialist. Neil and Andrew had readily offered them their spare room.

“I have plans tonight,” Andrew decided, opening his eyes again.

“Oh yeah?” Neil laughed. “Doing what?”

“I will have dinner at Heather’s,” he said. “Will has been asking me to help him with his humanities assignment anyway.”

“What’s it about?”

“It’s an assignment for his politics and law class. Having majored in Criminal Justice, I have a valuable insight,” Andrew replied, semi-quoting Will from when he asked for help the week before.

“You can also offer valuable insight because you’re a criminal?” Neil taunted. Andrew tugged on his hair and narrowed his eyes at him.

“I haven’t broken any laws since I turned twenty-one and it was legal to drink,” Andrew said. Neil opened his mouth to argue so Andrew covered it with his hand. “Traffic laws don’t count,” he said. Neil licked his palm, so Andrew pulled it away and wiped it on his tee shirt.

“They do kind of count,” he said. “Does he need help with math?” Neil asked into the silence. Andrew was genuinely surprised by his offer and raised an eyebrow down at him.

“Don’t you want to go train with Kevin tonight?”

“He’s here for a couple days, if I’m invited to dinner and tutoring, I’d like to come,” Neil said.

“Technically, I don’t know if I am invited to dinner myself yet,” Andrew said, reaching to the bedside table to fumble around for his phone. It was nine in the morning so Heather would be awake and possibly at work after taking Will to school, which meant she would most likely answer her phone.

“You make the call, I’ll make breakfast,” he said, pressing a kiss to Andrew’s cheek and clambering off the bed. Andrew watched him go, the door left open behind him, and then turned his attention back to his phone to call his sister.

“Andy!” She answered happily. “And I can call you that because it’s not your name,” she added. Andrew smiled and wriggled himself into a seated position against the headboard.

“Hey Jen,” he said, her laugh in response was delighted.

“What can I do for you?” She asked.

“Has Will told you about wanting my help with his assignment?” Andrew asked. Heather hummed in agreement and waited for more. “Can we come over tonight? I’ll help him with it. Neil’s offered math assistance too,” he said.

“Oh yeah, absolutely. I’ll make spaghetti for dinner?”

“That sounds good,” he agreed. “See you at six?”

“Sure thing, do you want to bring dessert? Because Will ate the last of our ice cream last night,” she said.

“Will do,” Andrew agreed, and they said their goodbyes before he hung up and followed Neil’s steps down to the kitchen. The blue-eyed man was whisking eggs at the counter while bacon cooked on the stovetop and he had a half-eaten apple near his elbow.

“Hungry?” Neil asked. Andrew went around him and took the apple off the counter to eat some of it while he waited.

“Do you want me to…” Andrew gestured at the bacon and put the apple in his mouth. Neil nodded his head and flashed him a grateful smile that made Andrew’s heart swell as he picked up the tongs and went to the stovetop and the sizzling bacon. After turning it, he connected his phone to the Bluetooth speaker and pressed play on the ‘Be Happy’ playlist Will had made for him. It had some songs Andrew knew, some he didn’t, and some that made Neil smile and dance around the apartment as he went about his day and that did make Andrew happy. All the blinds were open in the living and kitchen space, the trees down the side of their house sending dapples of light across the piano and the dining table. For a moment, Andrew understood why Neil liked sharing the short videos to TikTok with little glimpses of their private life. This was his life, this was nice and this was better than anything he ever would have thought he’d get. For a moment he liked the idea of sharing that, showing the world that this was his life and that he was grateful to have it. TikTok wasn’t his thing, he didn’t much care for it, but he was used to Instagram now, so he took up his phone and leaned his hip against the countertop to take the picture. It caught the dappled light on the piano, Neil’s navy-blue clad elbow, whisk and the side of the bowl. The colours were nice to look at, the lights were pretty, and it had just a little bit of Neil in the picture without telling anyone who it was. He put the apple in his mouth, wondering when he’d gone soft for his life, and crossed to Neil to show him the picture.

“Is this okay?” He asked.

“Your account or mine?” Neil asked, peering down at the picture.

“Mine,” Andrew answered. Neil nodded his head, eyebrow raised in curiosity at the fact that Andrew wanted to put a picture up at all, let alone something with part of Neil in it. He didn’t ask, but Neil pressed a quick kiss to his cheek and went back to the eggs. Andrew hopped up on the counter next to him and posted the picture with ‘I never used to like mornings’ as the caption. This wanting to share was a phenomenally new feeling, it scared him a little bit because sharing things he loves and people he cares about often means they get taken away from him, but when he looked down into Neil’s face he felt a little less scared. No one was going to be able to take him away from him, he knew that for a fact and when Neil made a face at him before turning to the stove to cook the eggs, Andrew smiled. He was allowed to keep this.

*

Andrew parked the car in the designated area cordoned off behind the animal rescue centre and Neil was too busy sending an unimpressed look at Calum through the windshield to realise when Andrew had gotten out. He walked around the front of the car and stood in Neil’s line of sight with an unimpressed look on his face and Neil, a dumbass until the end, looked to the driver’s side as if to see if Andrew really wasn’t there before he climbed out.   
“You’re an idiot,” Andrew said when Neil closed the door behind him.

“I know, I just don’t trust him now,” Neil muttered. Calum had already slipped inside through the back entrance, which was made available to the team so that they didn’t have to be bombarded by fans or paparazzi before the charity drive started.

“You didn’t trust him before,” Andrew pointed out, but Neil didn’t seem to appreciate his input as they walked into the rescue centre. The Lions were a team of twenty-two players, but only ten had been asked to attend the event for varying reasons. Andrew and Neil were there because their participation in the kitten video a year ago had gone viral, and Olivia and Jane were there for a feminine presence with the other six male players. Everyone who’d been invited was conventionally socially deemed attractive as well, if you ignored Andrew and Neil’s height and Neil’s facial scars. The thought in and of itself made anger coil in the pit of his stomach and he paused just before they reached the group to press a kiss to Neil’s burn scar on his cheek.

“What was that for?” Neil asked. Andrew didn’t know how to articulate his answer, so he just waved him on to keep walking and Neil did so with a shrug. Olivia was already holding a puppy when Neil and Andrew joined, and by the looks of it they were last to arrive.

“Behave, you two!” Fiona said firmly when she caught sight of them from her desk to the side. “You’re also late, the cameras are rolling,” she added. Andrew ignored her, choosing instead to join Olivia and meet the puppy in her arms. He glanced over his shoulder and saw Neil peering warily into a large cage that appeared to house a rooster. It crowed and Neil nearly fell backwards in his haste to put space between him and the cage. Andrew laughed, which earned him an annoyed glare as Neil righted his clothes, but before he could snap at Andrew or run his mouth after not having been there for even a minute, Fiona coughed pointedly and Neil shut his mouth. Andrew turned to face Olivia and the little beagle crossbred puppy in her arms.

“Neil, come meet Peppa,” Jane called. Andrew and Olivia, and everyone else, followed the voice to see Jane sitting cross legged with a piglet in her lap and a very happy grin on her face.

“I don’t want to meet Peppa,” Neil said carefully.

“Don’t be a chicken,” Andrew said.

“That’s offensive to the chicken, he wasn’t scared of Neil at all,” Olivia teased. Neil looked extremely irritated, but he took the bait and went to where Jane and her piglet were seated.

“Who’s this?” Andrew asked, petting the puppy’s head and rubbing his long floppy ears.

“Her name is Coco,” Olivia said. _Her long floppy ears._

“She’s cute,” he said. Olivia grinned and kissed the top of Coco’s head.

“She is, I have fallen in love,” she said. Andrew shook his head at her. He’d known she would fall in love with one of the animals, he’d warned her against it. Olivia’s brother had moved in with her when he moved out and his job as a stripper meant he worked strange hours and he wouldn’t be able to stick to whatever routine she put in place for a dog when she was interstate for away games.

“Hopefully she finds a good home today then,” Andrew said. She pouted and kissed the puppy’s head again.

“She has, mine,” Olivia said. Andrew raised his eyebrow at her and she huffed, bouncing Coco as if she was an actual baby. “Fine, Riley’s home.”

“You can’t just adopt a dog and leave it at your partner’s house,” Andrew said. “Especially without warning them.”

“I will tell them after I’ve signed the papers, Riley will love her,” she said firmly. Andrew knew he was battling a losing battle and let it go, turning his attention back to petting the puppy he was probably going to have to get used to if she was being adopted by his friend.

“No, Jane, I said no.” It was Neil’s voice, cutting through the chatter to reach Andrew and he turned at the firm, insistent tone. Neil was clambering to his feet, glaring down at the younger girl who was clearly trying not to laugh.

“She will not hurt you,” Jane promised, trying to pass the piglet to him, but Neil’s glare only hardened, and he took a large step away, bumping into a table with cages of bunnies on it. Calum and Josh, who were closest, leapt forward to grab the two large cages while Neil, pale as he was, steadied the table. Andrew put his head in his hands and sighed, but when he looked up, Neil was sending him a borderline pleading look.

“He is useless,” Olivia observed. Andrew shot her a withering look and she laughed. “With animals, I mean.”

“He just doesn’t trust things he doesn’t understand, you should have seen him the first day he met our goddaughter,” Andrew muttered.

“As bad as the rooster?” Olivia asked. Andrew remembered catching Neil before he fell over his duffel.

“Pretty much the same,” he said. Olivia laughed and decided to take pity on Neil, beckoning him over to safer ground to meet Coco. Andrew subtly squeezed his wrist when he joined them and tilted his head in the direction of the cage of tiny, baby kittens.

“Stay, meet Coco,” he said. “I am going over there.”

“Okay,” Neil agreed, taking Andrew’s place beside Olivia and Andrew watched him carefully pet her head before he walked to the litter. The kittens were mostly asleep, but a completely black one with bright green eyes was tramping around the cage and it paused with one paw up when it saw Andrew. He smiled and reached down into the cage to scoop it up and the black kitten immediately tried to climb up his black armbands until he put the furry monster on his shoulders where it started playing with his hair. Andrew laughed quietly to himself and leaned his back against the table where the kittens were sleeping and entertained his temporary friend, one eye on Neil and Olivia where they were navigating Neil’s distrust and interest.

After about half an hour of the various invited media publications taking candid footage, the Lions were mic’d up for their individual interviews and statements they would participate in for another half an hour. Fiona grabbed a man’s sleeve as he passed her, making a beeline for where Andrew was holding a now sleeping black kitten.   
“He can mic himself, just give it to him,” she warned. Fiona and the man with the mic looked over at him so Andrew schooled his features into his most dangerous look and the man swallowed as he nodded at her. She let him go and the man walked over, staying as far as he could whilst holding the little box with the cord and mic clip out to Andrew. He put the kitten away and took them without a word, clipping the box to the waistband of his ripped black jeans. He fed the cord up the back of his army jacket and clipped it to the collar of his tee shirt, just as the same man was apprehended by Fiona again to reiterate the same warning about Neil. Andrew watched as Olivia handed Coco to Neil, who seemed a little more comfortable with the puppy than he had with the piglet; and took the mic from the man so she could mic Neil up efficiently. When she was done, Andrew walked back towards the pair of them as she took Coco off Neil.

“So, dogs are better than pigs and roosters,” Andrew said.

“Fuck off, I didn’t mean to jump. The duck was just so loud,” Neil muttered. Andrew felt his eyes go wide and he looked at Olivia who was very busy trying to swallow her laughs.

“Did you call it a duck?” Andrew asked, looking towards the rooster. Neil frowned and shrugged.

“Chicken, duck, same thing,” he snapped. Andrew rubbed his temples.

“You’re an idiot,” he said. Neil didn’t have anything to contribute to that so instead resorted to changing the subject and pointed over Andrew’s shoulder at the cage of kittens.

“Do not even ask,” he said. Andrew knew what he meant, but he decided to feign confusion.

“What?”

“You are not adopting that little black cat,” he said firmly. Andrew hadn’t been intending to, the kitten was cute but something that small needed a lot of training and time which neither of them would really have when the season started.

“No, I’m not,” he agreed. “When we get a cat, it’ll need to be a year old at least.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Drew, no,” Neil said.

“Yes, but not yet,” he said. Neil narrowed his eyes, but didn’t deny him which was a small improvement and Andrew smiled directly at his boyfriend, no matter how annoyed his glare was.

“I didn’t know you wanted a cat,” Olivia said. Andrew shrugged at her but didn’t feel like divulging his reasons behind it. He’d already rung Renee twice in as many weeks to talk about his want for a cat and his anxieties over proposing. She’d reminded him that wanting a cat is not something to feel embarrassed over, that it was noble for him to want to rescue an animal and give it a better life, especially when he genuinely liked the idea of the companionship. It had been a little harder for her to hide her surprise and happiness about his thought of proposing and when he’d rung her in the middle of an internal meltdown inside the jewellery store last week she’d actually needed a very small moment to _squeal in excitement_ and Andrew had, for a moment, thought that Allison had answered the phone.

“I didn’t know he wanted a cat either, until recently,” Neil added. Olivia hid her smile against the top of Coco’s head, but before they could talk more, she was summoned over to the table where adoption papers would be signed when they let in the general public. A few of the media organisations wanted to film her signing the paper for Coco and ask her questions about the adoption, get the message out about rescuing instead of pet stores. Calum and Josh were being interviewed about their adoption of bunnies and how having toilet trained rabbits were good for apartments without much access to outside and weren’t good environments for larger pets like dogs. Jane was talking about her parent’s farm and the absurd amount of rescue animals they already had, and how she was going to take Peppa with her to the farm on the weekend. Neil took the opportunity to relax at Andrew’s side, Andrew saw it in the set of his shoulders.

“You good?” Andrew asked. Neil made a face that suggested he was a little uncomfortable.

“I’m okay, I just… in little while I’m going to be encouraging fans to adopt animals and I don’t even understand the desire to keep a pet in your home,” he answered. Andrew didn’t have all the right words to explain why he, and many others, wanted pets, and he didn’t really know what he was supposed to say to make him understand.

“You can learn a lot from having pets,” he said with a shrug. “Plus, they’re cute.”

“You’re as bad as everyone else,” Neil said, shaking his head, but the smile on his mouth was fond. Andrew feigned offence.

“I’m at least twice as bad as everyone else,” he said. Neil was surprised enough to laugh, but before he could say anything back, Fiona pointed the mic guy in their direction. They watched him approach, Neil’s ease and laughter melted away to guarded curiosity and Andrew was already bored by the interview and it hadn’t even started.

“Hey, I’m Jimmy Knowles, I’m an intern at Exy Today. I was hoping to get a quick interview from both of you, we can do them separately if you would feel more comfortable…” he said quietly, looking incredibly nervous.

“It’d be quicker if you just interview us at the same time,” Neil said. Jimmy seemed confused by this offer, probably under the same belief as everyone else that they hated each other, but he nodded his head.

“Will either of you be adopting a pet today?” Jimmy asked.

“Absolutely not,” Neil said.

“Thinking about it,” Andrew added. Neil shot him a reproachful look that Andrew saw in the corner of his eye, but he ignored it.

“Uh, Minyard, Olivia is a good friend of yours, what do you think of her adopting, um Coco, I think the dog’s name is?” Jimmy asked. Andrew considered the question for a moment before shrugging with one shoulder.

“If she is happy, and she wants to give Coco a good life then it’s her decision,” he said.

“Josten, what are your thoughts on the adoption drive and the general ‘adopt don’t shop’ ideology?” Jimmy asked. Andrew choked his amusement back at the dumbfounded look on Neil’s face at the question.

“If people want pets then adopting them sounds better than the puppy mills Olivia was telling me about. I’m all for giving these animals second chances,” he said carefully, sounding unsure. “Did that answer the question?”

“That’s all good guys, do you have anything you want to say?” Jimmy asked. Neil and Andrew both shook their heads and Jimmy looked relieved, and still very confused, as he turned and left. He joined the reporters who seemed to have finished getting whatever it was they wanted from the individual Lions and before Andrew could blink, the team was being split up to different stations for when the public were let in. Peppa, Coco and the two rabbits who had already been adopted by the Lions were stamped with ‘Adopted’ on their papers and put away, and Olivia was put in the puppy pen to help fans choose from them. She was joined by Jane and one of the other guys. Josh and Calum were left with the rabbits and rodents, while two other boys were with the miscellaneous animals like the rooster and, well, Peppa if she had been available. The final man, a friend of Jane’s, was asked to man the desk with one of the rescue centre’s staff, to help finalise adoptions.

“You two went viral with kittens, you’re in charge of them,” Fiona said, pointing her finger at the cage of now well awake kittens. Andrew noticed that their designated staff member was a tall, fit looking young man who had refused to make eye contact with any of the Lions for the past hour. He’d also set up two pens on the floor near the kittens, filled with older kittens (teenagers?) and adult cats.

“Andrew,” Neil said seriously, apparently not caring that Fiona was still in front of them. Andrew, in turn, turned an innocent look his way. “Do not ask to bring one home,” he said.

“Let’s get this over with,” Andrew replied. He wasn’t particularly planning on choosing a cat today, their home had nothing in it that would be appropriate for cats, for one thing. A second thing was that Kevin and Thea were going to be there until Friday and they were going to Heather and Will’s for dinner so they wouldn’t be home to settle cats into their new home. Fiona sent them on their way with another warning to behave. Neil followed Andrew to the cat section and Andrew peered suspiciously at the tall man in the burgundy rescue centre uniform shirt.

“Hello?” Neil said from Andrew’s other side. The tall man went bright pink and Andrew realised his lack of eye contact and the radio silence all morning wasn’t because he was shifty, but he was a fan trying his best not to make a fool of himself. He kind of reminded Andrew of Neil’s friend Jaiden, just a taller, darker haired version. Well, Jaiden was kind of Andrew’s friend by now too, but he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to say that or the guy might pass out.

“Hi,” the man croaked. “I’m Alex.”

“That’s our captain’s name,” Neil said. Alex went a little bit pinker and nodded his head quickly. “I’m Neil, this is Andrew.”

“I know, I uh, I’m a fan,” he said.

“Oh, that makes sense,” Neil said. Andrew rolled his eyes and turned his attention to the amassing crowd of patrons and pet seekers. This special, midweek adoption drive with the Lions, was only going to be running for an hour so as to discourage people from stopping to harass the team in their mission to get a pet, but Andrew felt dread fill his veins as more and more people decked out in Lion colours came into the building and tried to get the attention of the various players.

“Don’t you two, um, hate each other?” Alex asked, and Andrew heard him swallow nervously.

“Swap places,” he snapped at Neil who did so without asking why, stepping neatly between Andrew and Alex while Andrew stood neared the middle cage of not-quite adult, not-quite kitten cats. At least here, Andrew didn’t have to listen to Alex nervously make it through the hour and he was further away from the kittens which he figured would be the most popular stop for the patrons.

“Andrew hates most people,” Neil said.

“But, aren’t you guys enemies, why would they make you work together?” Alex pressed. Andrew wondered where his confidence had come from.

“Did you see us getting scolded by our press manager, Fiona?” Neil asked. Andrew glanced over in time to see Alex nod. “She told us to behave, so this is us behaving.”

“Also, our heights are closer, it looks better on camera,” Andrew supplied. Neil wrinkled his nose at Andrew.

“Speak for yourself short ass,” he said. Alex genuinely looked relieved to see them antagonising each other, but he didn’t say anything because the first of the customers had wondered over and he had to help Neil pick up and hand over kittens to their potential new owners. While they were distracted, Andrew crouched down to look into the middle cage of cats he’d not yet had a look at. Some were playing, some were lazing in little ying and yang circles, two were trying to climb the cage together. Andrew put his arm in and gently pulled them free and put them back on the floor. One was white, the other was an orange tabby, and when Andrew put them down, they leapt on each other before the ginger cat got free and ran away with a bounce. Something about these two cats was familiar to Andrew, with the white paws and belly of the ginger cat and the distinct grey smudges on the white one’s nose and tail. He frowned and looked closer, trying to place why they were so familiar, and his brain supplied the image. Over a year ago, in Los Angeles, a box of kittens and coloured cushions, teaching Neil how to be affectionate to something so small and helpless. Andrew’s eidetic memory matched the line that separated the ginger from the white on the tabby’s front paws and belly, it was the exact same shape only bigger. The grey smudges, although a little different with how much she’d grown, was telling in and of itself. These two cats were the ones from the ‘Kitten Interview’ a year ago. What the hell were they doing in Chicago? Why were they in a rescue centre so far away from LA? What happened to them in their short lives to get here?

"Hey, can I have a look at the black and grey one?" A woman asked, nearly making Andrew jump. He looked up at her from his crouch and then down at the cats in front of him, found the one in question and passed it to her without a word. He kept an eye on her as she showed her two kids the cat and before long a centre staff member was bustling over with a carrier and whisking them away to the adoption table.

"Josten," Andrew said, getting to his feet. Neil looked over but didn't respond until he'd handed a ten year old boy the black kitten Andrew had befriended. The little boy looked so unbelievably happy he was nearly in tears and the kitten nudged his cheek with the top of his head. Andrew was content to see him go to someone who wanted him so badly.

"What is it?" Neil asked. Andrew crouched back down and tugged on the hem of Neil's shirt until he followed.

"Look at those two cats," he said, pointing the tabby and the smudgy one out.

"I'm looking," Neil said, but Andrew could see he didn't get it.

"Those are the interview cats," Andrew explained, knowing he needed to be patient, or this would fall apart before he even had a plan. Neil laughed and started getting to his feet, but Andrew grabbed his elbow to keep him down.

"Drew no, they're not. Those cats will be living it up in some Los Angeles mansion by now, not slumming it in a Chicago rescue centre," Neil said. Andrew tugged his arm again, not really sure how to get him to believe him but needing to make a point.

"Neil, look at-" Andrew was cut off by someone asking to look at the tortoiseshell adult cat in the pen over. Neil sent Andrew a pointed look he didn't want to see and shook him off so he could help. Andrew went to swear under his breath in annoyance but caught sight of a small child watching him so he swallowed his words.

It took twenty-three minutes for Neil and Andrew to be able to reconvene in a crouch at the middle cage, Andrew counted. Neil didn't seem to appreciate being latched onto and dragged back down, but he crossed his arms across his thighs and waited.

"They're the same cats, I swear to you," he said. "Give me your phone."

"Why?" Neil asked, taking his phone out and handing it over. Andrew unlocked the phone with his fingerprint and while he scrolled through Neil's pictures, Neil helped the next family. God, why did Neil have to take so many pictures on his phone? He had a fancy camera for a reas- aha! He found the picture of them kissing with the kittens in their hands, the picture of just Andrew the next swipe.

"Here, look, I'm right," Andrew said, showing Neil the picture when he joined him again. Neil frowned and took the phone to look at the picture and then looked at the cats.

"Okay, sure, they're very similar. But those cats would only be a year or so old now and these guys look nearly adults. They'd also be in Los Angeles," Neil said, putting his phone away. Andrew's frustration was melting into desperation. He looked at the cats again and the tabby cat padded its way across the cage towards him. He put his hand in and scooped him up to his chest. When he looked at Neil again, he saw his boyfriend's eyes widen then shake his head. "Andrew no, they're not the same cats and we aren't taking them home."

"If I can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that these cats are the ones from the interview, can we keep them?" A trade, a deal, it's something they both understood. Neil hesitated before rolling his eyes and shrugged.

"Fine, but you can't convince me," he said. Andrew took the bait. He had a little under half an hour to fend the public away from those two particular cats and find a way to convince Neil of the truth. Neil got up again and went back to the task at hand, but Andrew stayed where he was and swiped the clipboard hanging on the outside of the cage that contained all of the information on all the cats in the middle pen. There was eight left, and he scanned the little images on the corner of each page, looking for a tabby face or a grey smudge.

"Can I have a look at the tabby?" A man asked, snagging Andrew's attention.

"Which one?" Andrew asked. The man pointed at Andrew's cat.

"No," he said firmly.

"Andrew," Neil scolded, and Andrew flared his nostrils in annoyance.

"He's been adopted," Andrew said, but he leaned in for the other ginger tabby in the pen and held it out. "This one is available."

"Cool, my wife just wants an orange cat," he said, taking the animal.

"Apparently, so does mine," Neil muttered. Andrew decided to ignore the fact Neil was calling him a girl and tried a smile at the man.

"Here is the adoption information for her, just take the cat and this sheet to the desk," Andrew said, pulling the paper out of the clipboard and handing it over. The man nodded, took the sheet, and headed off without so much as an acknowledgment. At least people weren't so invested in stopping to try and talk to the athletes. Andrew found the sheet shortly after, the big red 'Bonded Pair: Adopt together' across the top inconsequential to his interests.

"Mommy look! She has a grey heart on her nose!" A little girl, no older than six, cried as she stood on the other side of the cage.

"Already been adopted, sorry," Andrew said, voice robotic as he tried to read the kittens' history.

"Andrew!" Neil said.

"Honey, no we want an old cat who likes sleeping to give to Nonna," the girl's mom said. Andrew could feel the mom's gaze on him, but he didn't know what she was staring at, so he scanned the page. It wasn't until he heard Neil's sigh that he looked up again.

"The adult cats are these ones over here," Neil said, walking around Andrew to the third pen. Andrew realised he was probably supposed to have done that, helped her out, but he'd missed the intention behind her questioning gaze. Oh well, Neil's problem now.

 _Male and female bonded pair, desexed, microchipped, wormed…_ Andrew scanned past all the information looking for the history part of their chart.   
_Adopted at six weeks old from a media establishment in Los Angeles by a traveller who was road-tripping across the states. Outside of Chicago, the van was in a collision and the previous owner was badly injured. In need of intensive medical care and rehabilitation, the previous owner was unable to look after her travelling companions and they were surrendered to the centre. Previous owner was able to provide full history of vaccinations and check-ups._ Andrew smiled, feeling smug, and when Neil was next free, he grabbed him by the elbow and shoved the page at him.   
“They’re the interview cats,” he said. Neil looked sceptical, but he obligingly read the document and Andrew saw on his face when he found the history part.

“Why is this so important to you?” Neil asked, closing the pages and crossing his arms. The question threw Andrew for a minute and he realised he didn’t actually have much of an answer.

“Because I’m right and fuck you for not believing me,” was the answer he settled on. Neil seemed to accept that answer because he nodded once, but Andrew could see that there was more.

“If these are the cats from that interview,” Neil began, “why are they so important to you that you want to adopt them now?”

“Because…” Andrew frowned. “I don’t really know. LA is a long way away for two cats we’ve already met to be available for adoption.”

“You don’t believe in fate or destiny,” Neil reminded him. Andrew scowled at him.

“No, but I believe in coincidence and opportunity, of which this is both,” Andrew pressed. “It is them.”

“I believe you,” Neil admitted. “I do think that it is probably them, as bizarre as it is. I just don’t think we need to be adopting two cats right now.”

“You made a deal,” Andrew pointed out. Neil looked defeated and Andrew realised he didn’t want the cats if Neil didn’t, and it kind of hurt that Neil didn’t want them. He felt it in his stomach, a small ache, and he glanced down at the cats in the pen.

“We don’t have anything at the house suitable for cats, and we do travel every other weekend, what would we do with them?” Neil asked. Andrew glanced at him and saw that there was genuine curiosity there. He was willing to listen to solutions to the problems his logical brain had provided. Andrew crushed the hope trying to bloom in his chest, but before he could answer, Neil and Andrew were both interrupted by two more families wanting help.

“Can we have a look at the white one with the grey on its nose?” Andrew’s patron asked.

“No, sorry, she’s been adopted,” Neil said. Andrew’s eyes widened and he looked over to see Neil roll his eyes, but he had a small smile on his face. Andrew tried to help his patron as fast as he could so that he could turn his attention back on Neil.

“Already adopted huh?” He asked.

“I’m going with you’ve already thought this through, enlighten me on how this would work,” Neil said.

“We adopt them today but pick them up tomorrow after training. Tomorrow morning before training we buy cat things and then we can spend the rest of the week with them. When we have away games, Jackson can look after them. Heather and Will would too.”

“Okay,” Neil said, taking a deep breath. Andrew felt a tiny, small, twist of excitement in his stomach and he crouched down to look into the cage. Neil followed him and peered down at where they were dozing on the floor. “Okay, fine, yes. Yes, let’s get them,” Neil said. Andrew smiled and found Neil’s hand where it was resting on his own knee, squeezing it in thanks. Neil squeezed back and rose to his feet, pulling Andrew back up after him before letting go.

“They’ll need names,” Andrew said, watching out of the corner of his eye as the last of the patrons and media personnel were shepherded out. The hour was up.

“Do you have anything in mind?” Neil asked. Andrew did grin then, and the look on Neil’s face told him he knew he wasn’t about to like this.

“The tabby is King Fluffkins, the white one is Sir Fat Cat McCatterson,” he said. Neil’s eyebrows rose and then he burst out laughing.

“Isn’t the white one a girl? She isn’t even fat!” He said. Andrew smiled smugly.

“She is a girl, and no she’s not fat. Her name is a misnomer,” he explained. Neil didn’t ask what a misnomer was, but Andrew wasn’t sure he knew what it meant.

“People aren’t going to believe me when I tell them you named them,” he said. Andrew’s smug smile grew a little bit more.

“No, they won’t, which makes it even better. We can also call them King and Sir,” he said. Neil shook his head fondly and pressed a kiss to Andrew’s temple.

“Idiot,” Andrew said, mainly because he didn’t know what else to say and he wasn’t in the mood to process Neil’s words.

“Text Jacks, check if he really will look after them when we’re away. I’ll go fill out the paperwork,” Neil said. Andrew, who was allergic to paperwork, liked that idea and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He glanced at Alex, their supervisor, and saw the young man looked absolutely mollified by their interaction.

 _‘Neil and I are getting cats, will you look after them when we have away games?’_ he typed.

 _‘Fuck yeah I will! As long as they don’t piss off Cuddlebug or Lilyput.’_ came the quick reply.

Andrew showed Neil the text messages when he returned.   
“Who or what is a Cuddlebug or a Lilyput?”

“His snakes,” Andrew answered, putting his phone away. Neil choked on nothing.

“His snakes? He has snakes?” He demanded. Andrew shrugged with one shoulder. Finding out Jackson had been a cheerleader in high school had been a trip and Andrew had started actively trying to get to know his friend more than just a sparring partner. So far, Andrew had learnt that Jackson had been born in Australia but moved to the States before he could pick up the accent- thank God, that accent was one of the more annoying ones Andrew had come across- and that he had a veggie patch he was devoted to. Andrew had met both Cuddlebug and Lilyput, both harmless pythons he was told, and had decided he wasn’t just scared of heights anymore. He hadn’t told Neil his newfound fear of snakes, and he had no intention of telling him now.

“Just pythons, they aren’t very big, although I don’t know why he gave them such stupid names,” he said. Neil’s mouth dropped open and he shook his head.

“You have no right to judge pet names after what you just named our cats,” he said. Andrew liked that sentence very much. “If they get bullied at cat school for their stupid names, it’s your fault. Bad cat dad,” Neil added, lip curled in a small smile. Andrew rolled his eyes and crouched down to pet their cats.

“We have to pick Kevin and Thea up, say goodbye,” he said, looking up at Neil who didn’t look amused at being told to say goodbye to animals who wouldn’t understand it. Still, he reached in and picked up Sir gently, holding her to his chest.

“Hello Sir Fat Cat,” he said quietly. She started purring immediately and Neil made an unimpressed noise as he pressed his lips to the top of her head. “This is going to be a problem,” he decided. Andrew smiled and reached down for the second cat who didn’t seem quite as content to cuddle and purr and was more interested in wriggling his way out of Andrew’s arms.

“Settle down,” Andrew said, stepping closer to Neil’s side so that King could be close to his sister and he immediately calmed down just a little bit.

“So… Neil. Lost this one?” Olivia asked, sidling up to them.

“No, I don’t think I can count this as a loss,” Neil said, rubbing his cheek along the top of Sir’s head. Andrew hid his smile in King’s long fur. “We should go though, Kevin will be pissed if we’re late.”

“We’ll come back tomorrow,” Andrew told them as they put the cats back in the pen. King pushed Sir over and started licking the side of her face almost immediately.

“Cats are weird,” Neil decided.

“You’re weird,” Andrew said. “Do you need a ride home Liv?”

“Nope, I was just coming to say bye. Jane is going to drop me home,” she answered. Andrew accepted her hug and Neil let her mess up his hair and they followed her and Jane out of the rescue centre, ignoring Jane’s amused glances. Andrew supposed the cat was out of the bag about their relationship, at least to her.

*

Andrew knew something was wrong the moment he saw Kevin. His friend looked drained and haunted behind the eyes. He managed to entertain Neil in some Exy talk on the ride back to the house from the airport, but Thea didn’t say anything after she greeted them and thanked them for the ride and for letting them stay for a few nights. Neil told them where the spare bedroom was upstairs and where the second bathroom was downstairs while Andrew leaned against the piano, arms crossed and studying Kevin. His friend met Andrew’s gaze and nodded his head at the demand for answers he saw on his face.   
“Here, my love, can you take my bag too? I’ll be up shortly,” he said to Thea. She took the bag from him and disappeared up the stairs without a word. Neil crossed his arms and glared at Kevin as soon as she was gone.

“What’s wrong?” He demanded.

“Sit down, both of you,” Andrew said, waving at the couch. Kevin didn’t waste any time in sinking down in the armchair and Neil crossed his legs under him on the arm of the couch. Andrew pushed him as he walked past, and Neil fell sideways onto the cushions with an annoyed grunt. “After everything we went through to get this couch, you can sit on it like a normal person.” Andrew winked down at Neil as Kevin laughed lightly, and Neil realised what his intention had been.

“Jerk,” he muttered, holding up his middle finger, but there was no heat in his words. He scrambled into a seated position and stretched his legs out over Andrew’s lap when he sat down. “Okay, spill,” Neil said, looking at Kevin. The striker put his head in his hands and tugged at his hair for a moment before sitting up and wrinkling his nose.

“I don’t even really know what to say, guys,” he said.

“Why are you here?” Neil asked.

“What’s the specialist?” Andrew said at the same time.

“A fertility specialist,” Kevin admitted. Neil’s eyes went really wide and Andrew frowned at him. Kevin was nearly twenty-seven, Thea only a few years older, he wouldn’t have expected them to need help with conceiving kids, although the fact that Andrew now knew they were trying was maybe more than he’d wanted.

“Having, um, trouble?” Neil asked. Kevin sighed and it sounded like he was in a lot of pain, but he nodded his head.

“Thea has endometriosis, and it’s been really hard for her to get pregnant and the three times we’ve succeeded over the past two years… well she’s not pregnant anymore,” he said. The sadness on Kevin’s face made Andrew want to cringe away, he didn’t know how to handle it. For years he could protect Kevin from what threatened to hurt him, but this was entirely different, and Andrew didn’t know how to make it better.

“Shit, that’s… that sucks,” Neil said quietly.

“Yeah. So, there’s a specialist here in Chicago that’s apparently the best at helping women with endometriosis carry to term and whatever else it is that is stopping it from happening for us. We’ll be getting a small apartment close to the hospital next month when treatment starts because we’ll have to fly over a lot.”

“You can stay here,” Andrew said. Kevin smiled weakly and nodded his head.

“I know we could, but we will get our own place for when we’re here,” he assured him.

“How is this going to affect your season?” Neil asked, wincing at his own one-track mind. Kevin’s huff was more amused than annoyed.

“Oh, so that’s what that feels like,” he said. Andrew rolled his eyes at the pair, but at least that back and forth was a little more familiar for all of them. “Well, Thea has officially retired. She’s won her Olympic medals, been pro for a couple of years, been a champion. She wants this to be the next chapter of her life. Me, like Matt, I’ll still play and try out for Court, but I’ll just be spending free time here instead of San Diego, you know?”

“We get it,” Neil said. When Kevin flicked his gaze at Andrew, maybe seeking approval or just support, Andrew nodded his head and Kevin seemed to finally relax. “If it doesn’t work, you could always adopt?” Neil suggested gently. Kevin swallowed visibly and sank back in the chair.

“We were already planning to adopt, but later in life. When I was closer to retiring, when our own kid was a bit older, adopting an older kid who needed a home. Thea wants a baby, now, and… and I’d be a good dad. I think I would be…” Kevin’s eyebrows creased in the middle and he put his head back in his hands.

“You will be,” Neil said.

“I think so, too,” Andrew agreed.

“Yeah,” Kevin agreed, putting his hands in his lap. “Also, don’t tell anyone, okay? We aren’t really ready to share all this yet.”

“We won’t,” Neil promised, and Andrew made a noise of agreement. “Um, we were going to go to Andrew’s sister’s for dinner, but if you want, you and I could head down to that court nearby and run some drills for a bit? I could just go over later,” Neil said, sending Andrew an apologetic look for potentially bailing on their plans. Andrew waved that away, Kevin was important to both of them, if what he needed was to go play his stupid stickball with his brother then Andrew wasn’t going to stand in the way of that. Kevin smiled fondly at Neil, but he shook his head.

“No, it’s fine, you go. I think I’m just going to stay home with Thea today, we’re both on edge about tomorrow’s appointment. We’ll just order in and watch a movie,” he said. Neil and Andrew shared concerned looks, but it just made Kevin laugh.

“It’s more serious than I thought. He said no to Exy,” Neil said.

“And he’s going to order takeaway. Voluntarily,” Andrew added.

“Do I check if he has a fever?” Neil asked, mock dramatically.

“Call a doctor too,” Andrew agreed. Kevin laughed again and rose from his armchair, moving Neil’s legs to sit between them on the couch.

“I don’t think I’ve ever told you that I love you guys,” he said, putting his arm around Neil’s shoulders and pulling him into his side. Andrew’s immediate reaction was to scoff, but he swallowed that down. He and Kevin had gotten each other out of some dark places, through some dark times. Kevin had been the first person to tell Andrew he was worth something, could be something, and Andrew had been the first person to tell Kevin he didn’t have to come second. They argued and disagreed and for years they’d antagonised each other both intentionally and unintentionally, but they had been there for each other. Andrew had cleaned up Kevin’s messes, and Kevin had believed in Andrew in return.

“I love you, too,” Neil said with a laugh, trying to worm his way out of Kevin’s one-armed hug. Kevin grinned, and even though he still looked haunted, he also looked a little more comfortable and a little more like he was where he needed, and wanted, to be. Andrew caught Kevin’s eye and the tall brunette tilted his head in question.

“I will say this once, and only once, Kevin Day,” he said firmly. Neil stopped wriggling and Andrew saw his head pop around Kevin’s torse to watch. “I love you, too,” he muttered, looking down at his hands.

“Neil, bro, you made him go soft,” Kevin stage whispered. Andrew rolled his eyes, but he felt a small smile on his face.

“That wasn’t my fault! I blame Betsy and his post-Betsy therapist! You know, for helping him accept and communicate his feelings,” Neil said.

“Fuck off, I hate you,” Andrew muttered, but he didn’t mean it. Neil laughed and resumed trying to get out of Kevin’s embrace.

“Okay, half the time he can communicate his feelings,” Neil amended, rolling onto the floor. Andrew grabbed a cushion at the same time Kevin did and they both threw them on top of where he lay. Neil laughed again, and threw them back, getting into a seated position on the carpet in front of them.

“Hey, we forgot to tell you,” he said. “Andrew and I are getting cats, you’ll meet them tomorrow.” He grinned at Andrew when he spoke next. “You’ll never believe what Andrew named them.”

“Shut up,” Andrew moaned, reaching for his pillow again. Neil braced himself for the throw, but before Andrew could let go, Neil launched himself up and grabbed him by the wrist, yanking him off the couch to the floor beside him. It took Andrew a moment to regain his bearings, but he realised he still had his pillow in his hand and smacked Neil in the face with it, a smug smile on his face.


	34. "He Wants Seven Thousand."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The media and Harmony sucks ass, that is all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me, writing this: FUCK THE MEDIA IT IS CORRUPT AND THE WORST!  
> Me, a journalism and PR student writing this: ...anyway, moving on...

Andrew hung up the call with Heather and turned his attention on Neil and Kevin where they were trying to put together the impossibly large cat scratching post. Trying, being the operative word. Thea was watching nearby, shaking her head as it nearly fell on top of Neil and Kevin had to catch it.

"Hey, idiot!" Andrew called. He was more than a little smug that they both turned their heads to look at him. "I've trained you both well, but I meant my idiot," Andrew said, pointing at Neil. Kevin took that in stride and went back to the screwdriver while Neil raised an eyebrow in question. "Did you realise you left your phone at Heather's last night?"

"Oh, no I didn't. I couldn't find it this morning then forgot to look for it," Neil said with a shrug.

"We'll pick it up on the way home from getting the cats. Are you ready to go? They'll be closed at five," Andrew said, glancing at the time on the microwave in the kitchen behind him. They had half an hour and it was a twenty minute drive to get there. They'd been to the pet store for all the food, litter tray, toys and other cat things before training. At training they spent most of it doing drills and avoiding Fiona who'd seemed very invested in getting their attention for some reason or another. They'd gone home to check on Kevin after his appointment, who'd been in good spirits, and Neil and Kevin had spent the past hour trying to put together the cat tree.

"Does it look like I'm ready to go?" Neil asked, glaring up at the post leaning at a dangerous angle. Andrew met Thea's gaze and she smirked.

"You can see what they're doing wrong, can't you?" She asked. Andrew nodded. He'd known for forty-five minutes. Thea stepped forward and held her hand out for the screwdriver in Kevin's hand and he surrendered it with a sigh. Andrew took his cue from her and replaced Neil's hands with his own.

It took them five minutes.

"Now, are you ready to go?" Andrew asked, twirling the tool like he would have his knives. Neil snatched it from his grip and was clearly trying hard not to pout. Kevin wasn't even trying, he pouted at Thea and she laughed quietly, wrapping him up in a hug.

"Don't worry, baby, I still think you're a man," she promised.

"Let's go," Andrew told Neil, walking towards the hall table for his keys. Neil followed him out of the house and into the car, but before either of them could speak or admit to being excited about picking up their cats, Andrew's phone rang again, but it was Fiona and not Heather this time.

"Did she not get the hint at training?" Neil asked with a long-suffering sigh. Andrew shrugged and answered on loudspeaker, putting the phone in its cradle before driving off.  
“Hey Fi, you’ve got both of us,” Neil said, saving Andrew from talking.

“First of all, fuck you both for avoiding me today,” she said firmly. Andrew ignored her, and Neil didn’t respond either, so she just sighed in frustration. It’s her fault if she expected more from them. Andrew wondered idly if all the other teammates worked this close with the senior PR team member or if they were well behaved enough to be managed by the people beneath Fiona.   
“Fine, whatever, you’re both my stress dream anyway,” she muttered. “Look, I’m not actually calling to get angry. We have a problem,” she said. The _we_ caught Andrew’s attention and he frowned as he pulled the car onto the highway and merged as safely as he knew how into the traffic.

“What do you mean ‘we’ have a problem? _We_ haven’t done anything,” Neil said. Fiona sighed, the kind of sigh the preceded bad news and Andrew’s frown deepened.

“Oh, boys,” she said wearily. “I know that yesterday you were both careful to wait until patrons and publicity were ushered out of the venue before being affectionate, but a man by the name of Al Bowing caught some soft pictures before he was pushed out the door.”

“Oh,” Neil said quietly. It was the way he said it, a little like he’d been hit in the stomach by an Exy racquet- a sound Andrew knew- and couldn’t catch a breath, that made Andrew curl his fingers tight around the steering wheel. “When can we expect the pictures to be released?” He asked. Andrew gritted his teeth. He’d liked how it was going for them in the media at the moment. He liked their small glimpses posted online that they were wanting to share, he felt comfortable with the control they had, and he enjoyed it. Al Bowing, the man who started the rivalry rumours years ago, was threatening to rip all of that away. What made Andrew feel even more angry was that he was taking something important away from Neil in the process. Andrew had made his choice when and how to come out, to tell the world that he was gay and in a relationship with a man. Neil hadn’t made that choice yet, and every time he’d felt cornered or backed into it, it had just made him retreat a little further into the closet. Andrew had seen it happen when their team had near enough confronted Andrew in front of him after the coming out video. He knew Neil would come out when he was ready, that he wasn’t ashamed of it, he just wanted to control the narrative of his private life. Al Bowing had no right to take that control away from Neil; he was pretty sure there had been movies about that kind of blackmail-the-gay-person bullshit. 

“Here’s the thing, he’s offering us a buy-back,” she said carefully. Andrew glanced at Neil just to make sure he was as confused as Andrew was.

“A what?” Andrew asked at Neil’s shrug.

“He’ll let you buy the pictures off him, through me of course, for a set price. He sends them to us and deletes any copies and they never see the light of day,” Fiona explained. Andrew decided that that was probably worse than just finding the pictures posted to a weekly Exy tabloid or news site. Making them pay to protect something personal and inherently intimate was fucked up, especially when the pictures were taken without permission after an allotted time slot. Andrew was seething, especially because he didn’t give a fuck if the pictures were released, but this was hurting Neil, and Andrew would always have a problem with that. Andrew looked at Neil again and saw his boyfriend was trying very hard to curl into himself in the passenger seat.

“When do you need an answer?” Andrew asked.

“Three hours ago, you sneaky bastards. Bowing extended his offer until five, so call me back before then or there’s nothing I can do,” Fiona said, and as insulting as her words quite possibly were, Andrew could hear that she didn’t like any of this either. Andrew swiped the call to an end without saying goodbye and pulled the car to the emergency lane on the highway. He twisted in his seat to face Neil and saw that he had pulled his knees to his chest and his breathing had started to become shallow, eyes glazed over in panic. This was not the time, place or reason to have a panic attack, especially not his first one in over a year. Andrew, concern twisting in his gut, put his hand on the back of Neil’s neck and squeezed a little.

“Stop that, you’ll hurt yourself,” Andrew snapped. Neil shot a mean look at him, but Andrew wasn’t swayed, just glared right back as Neil fought to regain his breathing. When Neil found control and dropped his feet back to the floor, Andrew let go of his neck, but Neil caught his hand in his and squeezed. Apparently, the panic attack was over, but the fear still wasn’t.

“What do we do?” Neil asked. That didn’t exactly seem like the right question, in Andrew’s opinion.

“What do you mean ‘we’? This is your decision, Neil. I’m already out and there’s as many people who think we’re dating as there is people who think we’re rivals.”

“I know just…” Neil cut himself off to groan and Andrew only just managed to grab his other hand before he could punch the passenger door.

“Don’t take it out on my car,” he said, squeezing both wrists to underline his words. Neil yanked free, even though Andrew knew he hadn’t squeezed enough to hurt, and put his face in his hands.

“This is so fucked up,” Neil moaned, tugging at the curls tumbled over his forehead. Andrew’s heart gave a savage, painful beat inside him and he sighed, reaching out to take his hands away from his face.

“I know, okay? It sucks, it’s stupid and it is really unfair,” Andrew said, interlacing their fingers and keeping their gazes locked. “Just tell me what you want to do.”

“What are the options?” Neil asked quietly. Andrew hadn’t expected that question and quickly ran through contingency plans in his mind.

“We buy back the pictures, we let him release them and pretend we don’t see, or you come out first on your own terms before he gets the chance,” Andrew said. Neil winced, probably because he’d come to the same conclusions already.

“It isn’t really on my own terms, though, is it?” Neil asked, shaking his head dejectedly. “I’m still being forced into it. Either I do it before he does, or he does it and I just watch it unfold.”

“Pretty much,” Andrew confirmed.

“You know it’s not because I’m ashamed or anything, right?” Neil said, a colour of urgency in his tone. Andrew frowned at.

“Obviously,” he agreed. He knew Neil wasn’t ashamed of his sexuality, or of their relationship, and he liked to think Neil wasn’t ashamed of him either.

“I just don’t want someone to force my hand or back me into a corner to get me to tell everyone, that isn’t how I want this to go. I like how it is now, I like that we’d taken control of the narrative and were controlling what people saw. Even when we antagonise the stupid rivalry rumours, at least it was calling the shots. This, what Bowing is doing, is bullshit. I don’t like it, I feel…” Neil’s rambling trailed off and Andrew tilted his head, taking in Neil’s expression, the slight tremble of his fingers in Andrew’s own, and the way his eyes kept darting away.

“Dirty and uncomfortable, and a little ashamed?” Andrew guessed. He’d spent six or so years observing Neil, reading his ticks and tells had become second nature.

“Yeah, kind of. Which is stupid because I am _not_ ashamed of us,” he said. Anger at Bowing surged in Andrew’s gut again and he forced himself not to react to it. The only things within range were his car and Neil and he didn’t want to lash out at either. Andrew, a little more aggressively that was probably warranted, redialled Fiona.

“Hey, what are we doing?” She asked.

“We’ll buy back the stupid pictures,” Andrew barked. It was the only way he could protect Neil from this without going postal on Al Bowing.

“Don’t you want to know the set price?”

“I do not give a fuck Fiona, just buy them back and delete them,” he said. Neil made a funny noise and Andrew raised his eyebrows at him. “Fine, how much?”

“He wants seven thousand,” she said. Neil made another funny noise, but Andrew squeezed his fingers. Seven thousand dollars was a lot of money, and yes, they had just bought a house and completely furnished it, and yes, they travelled a lot, and yes, he was paying for Aaron’s medical school, but they both made more than ten times that per game without their stupid sponsorships and paid advertising and media appearances on top of that.

“Fine, text me details where to transfer the money or take it out of my next pay check. Just get those pictures back and make sure they stay deleted,” he said firmly, sounding more murderous than he had in a long time. When Fiona spoke next, her voice was soft and placating.

“I will, we’ll write a contract up and take him to the absolute cleaners if he doesn’t uphold his end of the bargain,” she promised.

“Thanks,” Neil said breathlessly. Andrew realised Neil was holding very tight to his hand.

“Bye boys,” she said. “And say hi to your cats for me,” she added gently. Andrew hung up on her. Neil tugged on his hand until he looked at him, and the small smile of relief on his face made Andrew feel a little bit better.

“Thank you,” he said. Okay, maybe he felt a lot better. “You didn’t have to do that for me.”

“Shut up, of course I did,” he snapped. Neil tugged his hand again and his smile grew.

“Let’s go get our cats?” He said. The tension seeped out of Andrew’s shoulders and he nodded his head, taking his hand out of Neil’s to put the car back in gear. Neil leaned over the stick shift and kissed his cheek. If Al Bowing didn’t keep his side of this deal, not only would the Lions be able to sue him for everything he had if they did the contract right, but Andrew would hunt his ass down and make him regret even taking the pictures in the first place.

*

“Sir really doesn’t like being in her carrier,” Neil observed as he got back in the car after collecting his phone from Heather’s house. Andrew had stayed in the car with the cats, but Will had come out to ask if he’d listened to the new playlist he’d made. Andrew hadn’t yet, but he’d promised to do so tomorrow. Sir, on the other hand, had mewled and cried the entire time the car had been idling in the driveway.

“It would appear that way,” Andrew agreed, beeping his horn as he pulled out of Heather and Will’s narrow driveway. They waved from their front door and Andrew looked away at the last possible second, turning his attention on the road. Neil thumbed half-heartedly at the notifications he’d missed in the near twenty-four hours he hadn’t had his phone.

“I really can’t be bothered,” he said after only a minute, tucking the phone into his pocket. “Can I put the radio on?” He asked. Andrew nodded, he didn’t really care what they listened to, it was only a fifteen-minute drive home from Heather’s although they might be caught in peak hour so he was considering going the long way which would cut out the highway. He saw Neil lean forward and fiddle with the knobs on the dashboard before the radio cut on to a sport station that didn’t even play music. Andrew was reconsidering his answer when the announcement made them both tense up.

_“Senior Scorpion starting striker, Harmony Lexington, has joined us in the studio today. Hopefully, she can shed some light on Neil Josten’s abdication from the Scorpions to the Lions after only one year as a pro, and maybe share some insight into the renowned rivalry Josten has with Lion goalie and former Fox teammate, Andrew Minyard,”_

“This cannot be happening,” Neil moaned. Andrew’s knuckles were nearly white on the steering wheel as he gripped tightly, rage and anxiety tensing his muscles convulsively.

 _“Hey Samuel, thank you for having me.”_ Harmony’s voice was sickeningly sweet, and Andrew flared his nostrils in annoyance.

_“Hello Harmony, it’s great to have you back! So, what can you tell us about Josten’s abrupt transfer to the Lions?”_

_“It was strange wasn’t it? He has the very public, nearly constant rivalry with their star goalie and Josten still joined the team? Almost like he has a bit of an obsession with Minyard, wouldn’t you say?”_ Harmony sounded as if she was sharing some big secret. Andrew heard Neil’s teeth grinding.

 _“What are you insinuating?”_ Samuel asked as if he was being let in on some big conspiracy theory.

 _“Look, all I’m saying is that Andrew Minyard outs himself to being in a long-term relationship with a man and suddenly I understood Josten’s consistent need to watch his games, get his attention, antagonise him, you know? There’s definitely tension between the two of them and my money is on a rejection or a nasty breakup in college,”_ Harmony sneered _._

‘I’m going to punch her teeth in,” Neil decided.

“I will help.” Andrew had to force his words out through clenched teeth. He just wanted everyone to leave them alone, give them a chance to breathe, give Neil the option to make his own choice about coming out.

 _“Are you saying that… Neil Josten is gay?”_ Samuel asked carefully. He sounded as if he’d bitten off more than he could chew and didn’t know what to do. He definitely didn’t sound very thrilled to have this ‘bombshell’ dropped on his show, especially without the sources to back it up.

“No, she fucking is not,” Neil snapped. Andrew hated the way he sounded equally annoyed as he did upset.

_“He never said in as many words, but he was awfully close with Oscar and his boyfriends last season, wasn’t he? Even lived with Dante, which is suggestive in and of itself_ _, wouldn’t you say?”_

“We’re both asexual, you fucking asshole,” Neil groaned. Andrew finally relented and let go of the wheel with one hand to reach out and put his hand on Neil’s leg. His boyfriend held on with both of his own hands and sighed deeply. Harmony was still talking, suggesting more intricate details of bullshit about what caused their non-existent rivalry and trying to make Neil sound like an obsessive ex or something ridiculous. Andrew drove with his knee for a few seconds to use his spare hand to turn the radio off.   
They drove in silence for a few minutes. Neil processing the segment while Andrew tried to find something to say that didn’t have the potential to actually incriminate him if Harmony ended up dead in the next twenty-four hours.

“She’s crossed one line too many,” Andrew said eventually. Neil hummed in agreement, lost in thought, so Andrew waited for a little bit longer. Soon enough he sensed Neil turn in his seat to look at his profile.

“This is getting too hard,” Neil said quietly. Andrew’s heart squeezed for one uncomfortable, painful moment as the fear sank into his bones. For that long, infinite moment, Andrew braced himself for Neil to end their relationship. Just walk away. “If it wasn’t for the fact that we have to get the cats settled in tonight, I might seriously be on the next flight to Portland for a fight,” Neil continued, ending the eternity of hurt and fear. He felt Neil lift Andrew’s hand and then Neil’s lips brushed his knuckles in absentminded affection, Andrew’s entire body breathing a quiet sigh of relief.

“I certainly have a date with the punching bag when we get in,” Andrew agreed, grateful that his voice sounded steady. Neil lowered Andrew’s hand back to his lap and Neil’s thumb started rubbing circles into his palm as he turned back to face the window.

“Am I stubborn?” Neil asked. Andrew snorted, popping his own bubble of tension.

“Was that a serious question?”

“Yeah.”

“What made you ask?” Andrew queried. “The answer’s yes, by the way. Just not as stubborn as me.”

“Because Harmony going off like that just makes me want to come out less and less. Like I don’t want to give her the satisfaction.”

“That’s not stubborn, that’s petty, but still relevant and I agree,” Andrew said, squeezing Neil’s hand. He saw Neil’s small smile out of the corner of his eye. They were only five minutes away from home now, and Andrew needed his hand back so that he could change the gears now that they were in suburbia again, but he waited until the last minute to take his hand back. Neil let it go without question but followed to put his hand on Andrew’s leg.

*

When they got inside, Andrew held the cat carrier to his chest, Sir yowling again as if she couldn’t believe that she was still in her mini prison.   
“Are you going to let them out?” Neil asked, but he sounded distracted as he read a note on the kitchen counter from, assumingly, their house guests. “Kevin and Thea have gone out for dinner.” He turned around as Andrew put the carrier on the floor and opened the front gate. He was not surprised when Sir was the first out, followed by King who flicked his tail in what could be curiosity or annoyance.

“Can you feed them?” Andrew asked, standing up straight. He narrowed his eyes when he saw the distant, calculating look on his boyfriend’s face. “You look like you’re scheming, why are you scheming?”

“I’ll feed them,” Neil confirmed. “But I’ve been thinking about Harmony and how to get her to leave me and mine alone,” he admitted. Andrew knew that he was included in that, and so was Luluand the others he’d left in Portland. At the rate Harmony was going, she would soon start going after anyone Neil or Andrew cared about, so he waited to hear Neil’s plan.

“Yes?” He prompted when Neil didn’t elaborate. Neil fingered the phone in his pocket and Andrew watched the cruel, feral, Wesninski smile crawl across his face. It wasn’t a wholly unfamiliar expression, but it wasn’t overly familiar either, and it promised to Andrew that Neil really did have a plan. One that was potentially dangerous, and curiosity sparked in his gut.

“You go punch shit, I’m going to make a call,” he said around his grin. Andrew wasn’t sure why he was enjoying it so much, but he pressed a hard kiss to Neil’s mouth.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” Andrew said when he pulled back. Neil laughed and tapped Andrew on the nose with his index finger.

“The list of things you wouldn’t do is short, my love, so you need not worry,” he promised. Andrew heard the lilt of Neil’s British accent and wondered who exactly it was that he was planning to call.

“Feed the cats,” was all he said, and went down the hall to their home gym to work out some of restless energy and residual anger.

*

When Andrew was finished, he had to remind himself not to use the downstairs bathroom because it was being lent to Kevin and Thea, and instead he walked down the hall in the gym shorts and muscle tee he’d changed into before working out. He had spent the first fifteen minutes punching without wrapping his hands, which was surely about to get him into trouble from Neil, and he used to towel around his neck to dab gingerly at the dried blood on his knuckles. He probably should have used gloves instead of just wrapping his knuckles, but the damage was already mostly done from the first fifteen minutes, so he hadn’t bothered.   
“Did you feed the cats?” Andrew asked, looking up when he walked into the living room. He couldn’t hide his smile at what he saw. Neil was sprawled on the long part of the couch with damp hair from the shower and his loose sleeping shirt slipped down his narrow shoulders to show his scarred collarbones. Sir was curled up in his lap and that cartoon about dragons was on the TV that Neil pretended he didn’t actually like.

“I did,” he promised, pointing at the floor at the end of the kitchen counter where a mat was placed, a water bowl and two mostly empty feed bowls on top. “You remember when I said that this was going to be a problem?” He asked, now gesturing at the white cat dozing on his lap. Andrew smiled a little bit more, warmth blooming behind his ribs. It was almost funny that not an hour ago he’d had a moment of fear thinking Neil was going to break up with him.

“Blatant favouritism,” Andrew said, shaking his head at the cat. “Where’s King?”

“Ran upstairs after he ate and was snooping around our room when I finished my shower,” he answered. Andrew nodded and Neil smiled, turning his attention back to the TV as Andrew moved to go upstairs for his own shower. Andrew found the ginger tabby curled up on his pillow on the bed when he went into the room.

“Hey, you bastard. Mine, not yours,” he said. King just made a _brrp_ noise and rolled onto his back to expose his stomach. “Terrible survival instincts, really,” Andrew muttered, tossing his sweat soaked towel in the hamper, his clothes and the pair of bands he’d been wearing following it. In the shower, Andrew hissed when the hot water hit his messed-up knuckles and he had to pause to shake his head at himself. He really had started going soft, and maybe that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. If he could acknowledge the pain, react to it without feeling as though it was a weakness, maybe he could accept that for what it was: healing.

After his shower, he pulled on that stupid black hoodie the pair of them had been surreptitiously trying to fight for since moving in together and a pair of grey sweatpants that were entirely too long for him. He eyed King where the tabby was still on his pillow and leaned down to be eye level with him. He wanted to pick him up and take him downstairs with him, but it felt intrusive. When he’d been a kitten in the box, he’d near enough begged to be picked up after most of his litter mates had been taken out of the box, and the rescue centre it had felt like mercy to give him affection after he’d been left in a cage, but this was King’s home now and Andrew felt awkward at the idea of picking him up and disturbing him.   
“I’m going to pick you up now,” he said to the cat, feeling a little stupid. King just made that dumb noise again, but he flopped against Andrew’s chest when he picked him up and purred happily. “Okay, you are kind of an idiot,” he decided before smirking, burying his fingers in the long gingery fur. “Neil is too, must be the hair colour.” King didn’t seem to have an opinion on that and continued purring as Andrew trudged down the stairs to where Neil and Sir was.

“Are cats usually this, I don’t know, affectionate, when they first find a new home?” Neil asked when Andrew came around the couch. He cradled King in one arm to swipe the remote and pulled a face at Neil.

“The fuck should I know? I’ve never had a cat before,” he answered, moving to sit down, but Neil stuck his arm out to stop him.

“Give me the cat, go get ice for your hand,” he said. Andrew scowled at him, but Neil didn’t budge and after a long moment he sighed and put King down on his legs. The ginger cat didn’t stay there, and Andrew felt smug as King followed him into the kitchen. He dug around for ice and found an ace bandage in one of the many first aid kits they had in the house - this one under the sink - so that he could wrap up his right hand which had worn most of the forceful hits and might need a little support for the night. When he returned to the couch, he sat down next to Neil, his back against Neil’s side and knees drawn up so he could rest his hands there while he iced them. Neil put his arm over Andrew’s shoulder and draped it over his chest.

“Hey, fleabag,” he said as King jumped up onto the couch in front of him and curled up on top of his socked feet. Neil grabbed the remote from where Andrew had dropped it in his half-strop for the ice and navigated to a different streaming site to put on Criminal Minds, probably because he knew Andrew had been watching it.

“We can watch this, but if you’re going to sit here and predict the endings for every episode and bitch and moan about how all the laws they break or what wouldn’t be admissible in court or what have you, I will put How To Train Your Dragon back on,” Neil warned. Andrew laughed and he sensed Neil’s smile. Look, he had studied Criminal Justice in college, he knew when the show fucked up, but it was even more satisfying getting the bad guy right. Still, for Neil, for tonight, he nodded his head and vowed to keep his mouth closed.

Two and a half episodes in, while they waited for dinner to be delivered as evening ticked closer to eight at night, Neil kissed the top of Andrew’s head.   
“No matter how many times people try to take this away from us, they never will be able to,” he said. Andrew swallowed his words, against the emotions it stirred in his chest and thought of the rings he had stuffed in his bedside table drawer. Now wasn’t the time to ask, not with Kevin and Thea expected home and the exhausting couple of hours they’d had in the car, but soon.

“No, they can’t,” he agreed, putting the ice on the coffee table so he could wrap his hand in the bandage and link his fingers with Neil’s, King climbing onto his lap now that the ice was gone. Andrew let himself relax against Neil and in turn, Neil held him a little tighter, a little closer.


	35. "I Do."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's happening! IT IS HAPPENING!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) Please, please, if you are binge reading this fic, stretch and rest your eyes, stay hydrated, sleep if you have to be awake in less than six hours, don't forget to take your meds, and remember you are allowed to eat. This fic is currently longer than like one and a half Lord of the Rings books so please take a quick rest!  
> 2) For those of you who sent me polite little messages on Tumblr, checking in on me over the past week or so- I am okay guys, I just had to sort out some job stuff and finish my semester of uni! And thank you all for being so kind and polite and patient, I hope this was worth the wait!

Andrew watched Sir Fat Cat McCatterson swipe at King Fluffkins as her brother tried to join her on Neil’s lap while Andrew walked into the living space after washing the dinner dishes. They’d had the cats for two and a half weeks and Sir had already claimed Neil’s as hers. King was only allowed to get Neil’s attention when she allowed it or when she was asleep and didn’t know it was happening.  
“You cat’s a bully,” Andrew said, leaning over to scoop King up in his arms. The tabby didn’t seem upset by this turn of events and just made that stupid _brrp_ sound he did whenever Andrew picked him up, petted or otherwise showed him affection.

“ _Our_ cat,” Neil corrected without looking up from the laptop he was balancing on the arm of the couch. He was twisted at rather an odd angle, not wanting to disturb Sir, but still needing to lean his laptop on something so that he could pay his Moriyama freedom debt. Andrew stretched out on the long part of their L shaped couch, King content to stretch out on his back on top of Andrew’s legs. Andrew shook his head and rubbed his belly like one might pet a dog.

“You are one strange cat,” he said.

“Takes after you,” Neil said idly.

“Shut the fuck up and pay the debt of your existence,” Andrew shot back. Neil snorted and clicked a few buttons on his trackpad.

“I’m pretty sure, after all these years, you’re the one paying the debt of my existence,” he said.

“More like paying the price,” Andrew said, making Neil laugh again.

“Yes, that too,” he agreed, voice trailing off as he read something on his screen. Neil had left the TV on with Criminal Minds playing that they’d been watching while they ate, but he wasn’t paying any attention and Andrew knew he’d left it on for Andrew’s benefit because he liked having something playing when he was washing the dishes or cooking. You could see, and if was loud enough you could hear, the TV from the kitchen and if he couldn’t be bothered trying to set up music then he’d prefer just leaving the TV on for background noise. Andrew reached for the remote and turned the TV down now that he was in the living room and he saw some tension ease out of Neil’s body, as if he’d let himself be comfortable with the higher volume for Andrew’s sake, which he probably had. Andrew studied Neil, his angular, narrow shouldered profile and the auburn hair curling around his ear and over his forehead. He really was one of the most handsome guys Andrew had ever seen, so much so that Andrew could remember how it felt to see him for the first time. Really see him, without his contacts, with his natural hair colouring, everything. He’d been beaten up then, but it had been Neil and as much as Andrew had grown to appreciate him before then, his stomach had still tumbled into his shoes when he’d seen him sitting in the waiting room at Easthaven. It may have been the first thing he’d felt in months. His stomach did still tumble around sometimes, when Neil tried or did something new to his appearance, or even just did something as benign as kissing him on the cheek when he came home. He was more than Andrew had wanted, and way more than he thought he really deserved, and Andrew loved him more than he had thought himself capable of loving. It was only because of Neil, and Andrew would never tell him that, that he’d mended his relationship with his cousin and his brother. It was because of Neil that Andrew had let himself try to heal at all. And he was healing, they both were, to a point where Andrew was the happiest he had ever been and well and truly happier than he ever thought possible for himself. He knew that he had done a lot of the work himself, to get to this point, but ever since that disastrous first trip to Eden’s in Neil’s freshman year, Neil had been by his side and it had made a difference despite it all.

“Marry me?” The question was out of his mouth before he could think any harder. Neil’s fingers paused on the keyboard for only a second before he answered.

“Sure,” Neil said without looking up. Andrew frowned at him, his heart threatening to stutter to a stop in his chest. The only thing that told Andrew his question had been heard correctly was the small smile on Neil’s face, lit up by the blue light of his laptop.

“Well, that was easy,” Andrew noted. Neil’s smile grew a little more and he turned his face away from the laptop to look at him, eyebrows raised.

“Were you worried?” he asked. Andrew hadn't been worried, that wasn't the right word, but the thought of asking had kept him awake at night sometimes. He'd had some doubts creeping in his mind, words repeating themselves over and over, the ones he'd heard in foster homes- from Drake. _Not good enough. Unlovable. You'll never find someone better. You're lucky it's me. I'm the only one who'll ever want you like this_. Andrew knew, he really did, that it wasn't true, but facing the prospect of asking Neil to marry him over the past few months, had brought the words back to the front of his mind. It didn’t help that he also knew Neil. The runaway who had promised to stop running. There was always the possibility that something would become too much, and he would flee. He was also not bound to social expectations, something Andrew had always liked about him, so he knew that marriage wasn't something Neil would have thought for himself. There was so many reasons for a proposal to go wrong, so many reasons for Neil to say no, and he hadn’t even raised an eyebrow when he said ‘sure’.

"No, not worried. I just, expected more?" Andrew hedged. Neil tilted his head in question.

"More what? Surprise and reaction?" When Andrew nodded, his grin turned sheepish. "I heard you, after the pre-Championship party."

"What?" _Oh!_ "You were meant to be asleep."

"Well, I wasn't," Neil replied with a teasing smile.

"You've been waiting for me to ask," Andrew realised. Neil's smile softened and he shook his head.

"Not quite waiting, I just knew that when you asked, I wouldn't be surprised. I wouldn't have to think before answering."

"You’ve had a few months to do the thinking," Andrew said, wondering how that made him feel. Curious, maybe, wanting to know what it was that Neil had thought about, how he’d reacted. Worried that perhaps Neil had freaked out a little bit.

“Technically, sure, but I only needed a few minutes to know that I wanted to say yes when you were ready to ask,” Neil said with an amused grin. “And before you can complain that I should have just asked you then, I want you to think about that. You would have hated it,” he said quickly, before Andrew could even open his mouth. _Asshole._ Andrew had been about to complain about Neil making him do the asking, but his… fiancé… had a point, he would have hated it if Neil asked first. Andrew smiled a little bit and nodded his head.

“Only a few minutes?”

“Yep,” Neil said, closing his laptop. “It wasn’t a hard decision,” he promised as he politely moved Sir off his legs to the couch cushion. Andrew felt something spreading behind his ribs as Neil crawled across the couch towards him, a smile on his face and eyes bright. Andrew scooped King off his lap so Neil could make himself comfortable and when he had stopped wriggling, Andrew put the fluffy tabby on top of Neil’s legs. King immediately jumped off, before Sir could attack him, but the white and grey cat seemed content to glare from the cushion she’d been placed on. Andrew put his arms around Neil’s waist as the taller man leaned into his chest and put his face against Andrew’s neck. His hair smelled like the green apple shampoo he had insisted on trying, his clothes like their laundry detergent, and he radiated warmth. Andrew closed his eyes and smiled into Neil’s curls, content down to his bones.

“We’re engaged,” he mumbled. Neil vibrated with a short laugh and pulled back. Andrew looked up into his beautiful, scarred face and those chilling blue eyes and wondered for a moment why he hadn’t asked sooner.

“We are,” Neil agreed, an embarrassed sort of smile matching a blush as it rose in his cheeks. “Am I supposed to wear an engagement ring now?” He asked quietly. Andrew didn’t try to stop himself from laughing and Neil looked even more embarrassed,

“I did not buy you an engagement ring, no,” he said. “We can get you one if you want, I just didn’t think that was your thing.”

“No!” Neil squeaked. “I’m good. I don’t want one,” he promised.

“I didn’t think so,” Andrew agreed. Neil leaned down and Andrew was a little surprised by how hard he kissed him, his fingers pulling on the back of Andrew’s hair a little bit.

“So, we are actually going to get married,” he said quietly when he pulled back, eyes a little wider. Andrew felt a little of his own shock melt away, replaced by a small fizz of surprise and anxiety before it was replaced by a feeling he could only describe as wonder. He was actually engaged. He was going to get married. To Neil Josten. He remembered Neil asking him what he would say to his younger self if he had the chance. The thought that he’d be able to tell himself he would be engaged one day made him smile a little bit, it would have rocked his younger self’s world. He wouldn’t have believed it; he wasn’t sure he really believed it now.  
“So, now what?” Neil asked.

“What do you mean? We finish this episode then go to bed?” Andrew answered, peering behind Neil where the episode was still playing. It looked like someone’s significant other was not being let into a hospital room due to them not being married. Another very good reason for them to actually get married, seeing as though Neil was, and always would be, a murder magnet.

“No, I mean, what do we do now that we’re engaged?” He pressed, finger under Andrew’s chin in a subtle bid to have his attention again. Andrew obliged and raised his eyebrow.

“You organise a wedding,” Andrew answered. “I already did the hard part,” he added with a small smile that just made Neil roll his eyes.

“You think I know how to organise a wedding? I didn’t think I would ever go to one, let alone plan one,” he said. Andrew made a face at him because Neil had been to Matt and Dan’s, Erik and Nicky’s, and Renee and Allison’s weddings. He needed a moment to wonder why all the Foxes, including themselves apparently, were getting married in their mid-twenties. He guessed it was because they were all so used of good things being taken away and this was a way to hold on to the things – and people – most important to them. Andrew didn’t want to know if that was what he was doing.

“You’ve been to three weddings and helped to plan Matt and Dan’s,” Andrew reminded him. Neil snorted inelegantly.

“I did not help them plan their wedding. I was the worst best man in existence,” he said. It was true. Renee and Allison had originally been asked to be the maids of honour, until everyone realised how useless Neil was as a solo best man. Allison had been made ‘best man babysitter’ and ended up standing next to Neil at the wedding, at her own recommendation, and had executive decision on anything and everything Neil was put in charge of.

“Then call Ally,” Andrew said, realising only after he’d said it that he’d used Allison’s nickname which he’d never done before. Neil noticed too, judging by the slight lift of his eyebrow, but he wisely didn’t comment. “She’d probably be delighted to be the first to know anyway.”

“Oh, shit,” Neil said, eyes going so wide Andrew was immediately concerned.

“What? What have you done?” He demanded. Neil wrinkled his nose in annoyance at the accusation.

“I didn’t _do_ anything, asshole. I just… I forgot that we’re supposed to, you know, tell people now,” he said. Andrew huffed a laugh and shrugged.

“I guess so, yeah. Do you not want to?”

“I don’t not want to, I just… I don’t want to make a big announcement or call everyone we know?” He replied sheepishly. “I don’t want a big wedding with a hundred guests and lots of cake and white lace and shit.”

“You don’t want cake?” Andrew asked, knowing that may not have been the point of his fiancé’s little spiel, but needing clarification. Neil grinned and kissed his nose, which really didn’t answer the question.

“You can have cake,” Neil promised. “I just mean, I don’t want to have a ‘big’ wedding,” he muttered. Andrew really hadn’t thought much past just getting the question out and finding out what the answer was.

“What do you want to do?” Andrew asked.

“Can we go to Columbia next weekend?” Neil asked with a toothy smile. The question felt as if it came from left field and Andrew went to ask what for before he realised what Neil meant.

“This weekend?” He checked. “You want to get married this weekend?”

“Well, yeah,” he confirmed. “Kevin will be there because he’s visiting Wymack and Abby, and Aaron lives there so our witnesses would be sorted. We could do it,” he said. Andrew blinked at that, letting the words process and felt himself trying to find the reasons why getting married in five days was unrealistic. It wasn’t.

“Really?”

“Yeah, really. Think about it for a second,” Neil said, carding his fingers through Andrew’s hair. Andrew closed his eyes at the sensation and hummed for him to continue. “Can you imagine us in the middle of a wedding organised by Allison? All white with three-piece suits and flowers, engagement parties, receptions, presents, and all of it? Or next weekend, just you and me, our brothers, and it’s done. We could be married in five days, Drew. Why should we wait?” He asked quietly before pressing his lips to Andrew’s mouth. Married within a week, no pageantry and spectacle, they wouldn’t even have to make a big deal of telling anyone.

“Okay,” he whispered into his mouth. He felt Neil’s smile and his stomach flipped over slowly, and he wasn’t even ashamed of the small sound he made as he pulled Neil closer. “I still want cake though,” he murmured as Neil pulled away to bracket his hips with his thighs. Neil grinned lazily and pressed a kiss to his pulse point.

“I will buy you a cake,” he promised. Andrew guided their mouths together, but it was only a short moment later that Neil pushed away with a wide-eyed look and Andrew groaned in frustration. “Do we have to write the speech things?” He demanded. Andrew frowned in confusion before he understood what he meant.

“Do you mean vows?”

“Yeah! Do we have to write vows?” He pressed. Andrew considered the question, but the idea of being that honest and vulnerable with Kevin and Aaron standing at their sides made him cringe.

“No, we can use the generic ones,” he said. Neil visibly relaxed and melted into Andrew’s arms, searching for kisses with hungry lips.

“We. Are. Going. To. Get. Married.” Neil punctuated his sentence with kisses and laughter. Andrew smiled and slid his hands under Neil’s shirt and up his scarred sides and splayed his hands against Neil’s ribs.

“Yeah,” he agreed quietly. “We are.”

*

It wasn’t until later that night, when Andrew had his arm draped loosely over Neil’s side and his forehead resting against the nape of his fiancé’s neck, did the reality of it settle in. He was going to be officially married to a man, paperwork signed and all. He leaned away from Neil to look at him in the dark. His hair was coppery in the light coming in from their open window, the tortured scars on his cheek and bare arm and exposed torso white and shiny. Andrew moved his hand to Neil’s back, his fingers touching the knobs of his spine as he moved up his skin. It had been so long, closer to six years than five, since he’d started _this_ with Neil. They’d shared secrets, kisses, keys, beds, and now a home. Andrew wasn’t allowed to want or need, he never had been, but then Neil had come along and turned everything upside down. He needed Neil, and he wanted this life with him.  
“I can’t sleep with you tickling me,” Neil murmured, shivering under his touch. He rolled over to face him, and Andrew’s hand fell to the mattress between them.

“Sorry,” he whispered. Neil smiled and moved closer, picking Andrew’s hand up and putting it on his waist as he aligned their bare bodies while he yawned.

“What were you thinking about?” Neil asked.

“What makes you think I was thinking about anything?” Andrew replied. Neil nuzzled close, his nose and lips finding Andrew’s neck, and Andrew closed his eyes.

“You touch me like that, tracing my skin all gentle, when you’re thinking,” he said softly. Neil was the only person in the world who had ever put in the time and effort into understanding Andrew as well as he did. “So, what were you thinking about?”

“About the weekend,” Andrew answered.

“What about it?”

“That it’s a good thing,” Andrew said. Neil’s laugh was soft and amused.

“Glad you think so, because it would be a little bit shitty if you didn’t think marrying me was a good thing after proposing,” he said. Andrew pinched his waist at the same time as he pressed a kiss to his cheek and Neil laughed as he pushed his hand away.

“You know what I mean, jerk,” he muttered.

“I do,” Neil promised. “I think it will be a good thing too.” They lay in silence for a while, before Neil pulled his head away, leaving Andrew’s neck sticky and damp from his warm breath. “We’re going to need to buy rings this week, aren’t we?” He asked. Andrew bit down on his lip and shook his head hesitantly. Neil lifted his eyebrows and poked him in the shoulder. “What do you mean no?”

“I… bought the rings a little while ago. When I was trying to decide if I should get you an engagement ring or not. I decided against it, obviously, but I found the wedding bands instead,” he explained. Neil slowly, sleepily, rose into a seated position and Andrew watched him go, his heart stuttering a little nervously in his chest.

“Why didn’t you show me before?” He asked, a smile growing on his face, easing Andrew’s anxiety a little bit.

“We were busy,” Andrew deadpanned, gesturing to encompass their bodies and the bed. Neil yawned again, distorting his laugh as he covered his mouth.

“I would like to see our rings,” he said. Andrew was tired so he let out a moan and lolled his head back for a moment, only rolling to his nightstand when Neil mocked his moan and prodded him in the ribs. He fumbled around in his top drawer until he found the smooth, plush box and pulled it out, turning on the lamp as he sat up, both of them wincing at the light. When they adjusted, Andrew dropped the box into Neil’s lap and leaned into the pillows and the headboard to wait. Neil popped open the lid and Andrew realised he was bracing himself to see disappointment on his face. The rings were plain white gold bands, not too thick or at all flashy, but Andrew liked them. Neil’s smile was small but bright and he flicked his eyes to Andrew. “Which one is mine?” He asked.

“The front one,” Andrew answered. Neil gently pulled it free of its box while Andrew dug around his drawer again, fingers curling around the small pouch that held a silver chain.

“Oh, Drew,” Neil said on an amused exhale. Andrew swallowed against his dry mouth and dropped the pouch where he had first dropped the box. He knew what Neil had seen, the engraving on the inside. “’Fuck you?’”

“The first thing you said to me,” Andrew said without looking up from their blanket on his lap. Neil put his hand in Andrew’s line of sight until he looked up.

“I love it,” he promised, a grin spreading across his face. “Who knew you were so romantic,” he teased. Andrew rolled his eyes.

“I put ‘fuck you’ on your wedding ring, how is that romantic?” He asked. Neil’s smile was knowing as he rolled the ring between his index finger and thumb.

“I know you, Andrew Minyard, putting the first thing I ever said to you on our wedding rings is romantic,” he said.

“Your ring, not ours,” Andrew said. Neil frowned and looked down at the ring left in the box.

“What’s in yours?” He asked, glancing back up. Andrew shrugged, biting down hard on the inside of his cheek.

“Nothing,” he said quietly. Neil looked surprised and then sad as he put his ring back and took out Andrew’s as if to check he meant it. After he’d examined the inside of the ring and found it smooth and unmarred, he turned his frown on Andrew.

“Nothing,” he confirmed. “Why nothing?”

“Because,” Andrew said, reaching out to take the ring and put it back in the box. “I’ve always wanted nothing.”

“Andrew Joseph Minyard,” Neil said softly. “You have no business saying things like that because it makes my stomach hurt.”

“Sounds like a you problem,” Andrew replied. Neil grinned and leaned forward to kiss him deeply, sharing a silent ‘I love you’ between their lips. When he pulled back, Neil picked up the pouch and sent Andrew a suspicious look.

“And what is this?” He asked. Andrew hesitated before closing the box on his ring and setting on top of the bedside table so that he could take the pouch and Neil’s ring in one hand and Neil’s hand in his other.

“It is a solution, kind of,” he said, rubbing his thumb over the scarred, middle knuckle of Neil’s left ring finger. Because of the injuries wrought to Neil by Lola Malcolm, the skin on some of his knuckles was raised and misshapen which could potentially make wearing a wedding ring difficult. He brought Neil’s finger to his lips and kissed the knucklehead gently before letting go and tipping the chain into his own palm. “So, you can wear the ring around your neck if it doesn’t go on your finger.”

"Oh,” Neil said. “Smart. Thank you,” he said, sounding genuine. There was a pause before Neil reached for the ring and slid it onto his finger. It didn’t go past his knuckle, as Andrew had expected, and for it to go bigger would mean it would be too loose around the base of his finger. Neil sighed and took the ring off, curling his hand into a weak fist and touching his thumb to his ring finger. “Necklace it is.”

“Necklace it is,” Andrew agreed, taking the ring back. He put it back in the box and put the chain in the pouch and left them on the nightstand before taking back Neil’s hand between both of his. “Don’t look so sad, baby.”

“Sometimes it feels like they took everything from me,” Neil muttered. Andrew squeezed his hand tighter, annoyance and frustration curling in his stomach.

“No, Neil, they didn’t,” he said firmly. “They tried to take everything, but they didn’t succeed. Are you listening to me? Just because you can’t wear a ring on your finger, doesn’t mean you can’t wear it at all.”

“When did you get so romantic?” Neil teased weakly. Andrew rolled his eyes and pulled Neil against him, leaning back into the headboard so Neil could lie on his chest. Neil buried himself under their blanket, making himself comfortable in Andrew’s arms, and Andrew curled his fingers in the hair at the back of his head.

“Shut the fuck up, Josten, and go to sleep,” he said.

“That is a good idea,” Neil agreed. Andrew turned off the lamp and closed his eyes, Neil’s weight comforting and familiar, and beyond reassuring. For the first time in a while, Andrew fell asleep without thinking, without worrying, without wondering.

*

When Andrew woke up, the bed beside him was empty and cold, which meant Neil hadn’t come back in for cuddles or attention after his run. Usually, Neil was so hyped up he would do everything in his power to get attention and wake Andrew up to get him to start his day. It was the only reason Andrew ever got up before eight on the days they didn’t have morning training. He rolled and looked at the clock on his nightstand, the box of rings and the pouch with the necklace still there. It was nearly ten o’clock and Andrew frowned, is mind catastrophising the whereabouts of his murder magnet fiancé. He rolled from his bed with a groan and startled when King darted out from under their bed and bolted out the door that they had taken to leaving open so the cats could come and go. Andrew followed at a much slower pace and the minute his foot hit the top step, he heard Neil’s voice which let the tension out of his shoulders. He found Neil sitting on one of the barstools at the kitchen counter with his phone at his ear and his laptop open. Andrew went over to the coffee pot and was grateful to find it full and hot.  
“What do you mean?” Neil said into the phone, sounding annoyed, but he smiled and nodded at Andrew when they made eye contact. Andrew poured himself a mug of coffee with sugar and cream while Neil listened to the person on the other end of the line.  
“No, I heard that part…” Neil said, trailing off. Andrew went around, leaving the mug on the bench in favour of putting his arms around Neil’s waist and propping his chin on his shoulder. Neil linked his spare hand in one of Andrew’s and tapped an annoyed beat against his fingers.  
“Yeah, Saturday morning,” he said, but Andrew saw him glance at the clock on the microwave. “Um, late Saturday morning,” he amended, shaking his head. Andrew looked at the laptop screen and saw that the Columbia county webpage open to the ‘marriage licences’ page.  
“I already filled out the application and paid the fee, so the twenty-four-hour waiting time doesn’t matter,” Neil snapped. “I’m just calling to organise the actual ceremony part, the certificate has been applied for, why aren’t you listening to me?”

“Alright,” Andrew said, holding one hand out, palm up. Neil didn’t even hesitate, just put the cell phone in his hand. “What’s the problem?” Andrew asked the person on the phone. The man seemed surprised by the voice change and he faltered his response.

“No problem, sir. Mr. Josten was just organising his wedding ceremony and I needed some information from him,” he answered.

“What information?” Andrew drawled, putting his cheek on Neil’s shoulder as he spoke.

“Um, now that I have the date and time, I just need the name of his bride and the contact information,” he said.

“His groom is Andrew Minyard,” Andrew replied easily, rattling off both of their phone numbers before the man could react. Andrew had already double checked it was legal, even though he could remember when the same-sex marriage bill had been passed, so this man could not complain.

“Wonderful Sir, thank you for that. We shall see you both on Saturday, please make sure to bring a witness each,” he said. Andrew hung up without saying goodbye and put the phone on the bench, reaching for his coffee again.

“You have no patience sometimes,” Andrew commented.

“Good morning to you too,” Neil replied. Andrew situated himself on the second barstool and gestured at the laptop.

“You started organising this all rather quick,” he said. Neil shrugged with one shoulder.

“You said it was up to me to organise, so here I am… organising it,” he answered. “You need to call Aaron, ask him to be free at eleven on Saturday morning.”

“I don’t need to ask him, I’ll just tell him,” Andrew replied. Neil pushed the phone close to Andrew with an expectant look on his face.

“I mean it,” Neil said. Andrew tried to compete with him in the ensuing stare-down, but he caved after a minute, not in the mood to deal with Neil’s stubbornness. He sighed and snatched up Neil’s phone, dialling Aaron’s number from memory even though he knew it was saved in his phone as _Not Andrew._

“Is Andrew dying?” Aaron snapped into the phone when he picked up. “Because if he isn’t then you have no business calling me.”

“Hello, dickhead. Charming as always,” Andrew said.

“Andrew?”

“Unfortunately,” Andrew drawled.

“Why are you using Neil’s phone?” He asked. “Oh, is he the one dying?”

“You could at least try to sound concerned,” Andrew said. Neil frowned, but Andrew waved that away. Neil shrugged and slid from his seat, moving to the kitchen and Andrew watched him.

“What the fuck do you want, Andrew?” Aaron asked. “I’m about to walk into class.”

“Be free Saturday at eleven, for about an hour,” Andrew said.

“Even though you asked so nicely, I need to decline your request,” Aaron replied. “Will you be in Columbia? What are you doing on Saturday?”

“I will be,” Andrew confirmed. “I’m getting married,” he added in a bland voice. There was a long silence that was only filled by Neil making food in front of him. Eventually, Aaron started laughing, which was expected, and Andrew rolled his eyes, pulling the phone away from his ear and turning it on speaker so the laugh could echo around the home. Neil smirked, but didn’t say anything as he cut up the vegetables for the omelette.

“Okay, sure. So, what will you actually be doing in Columbia in Saturday?” Aaron asked, once his amusement died down.

“Getting married,” Andrew repeated. “Neil just booked it at town hall, but we need a witness.”

“It was funny the first time, now I’m bored,” Aaron said. Andrew didn’t reply to that and Neil’s lip curled in a smile as he waited patiently. “Andrew?”

“Yes?”

“Are you being serious?”

“Yes.”

“Oh my fucking God,” Aaron said. “Holy fuck.” Aaron carried on exclaiming for a moment and Andrew drank a mouthful of coffee before taking his twin off loudspeaker and putting it to his ear.

“You done yet?”

“Forgive me for being surprised,” Aaron snapped. “I didn’t know you were capable of this much commitment.”

“That’s bullshit, I murdered for you,” Andrew reminded him. Neil choked on his mouthful of coffee and shot Andrew a curious look, as if he couldn’t quite follow the conversation, which he probably couldn’t.

“True, that was commitment. I just meant; I can’t imagine you as the marrying type.”

“You don’t have to imagine it,” Andrew replied. “I’m… I’m asking you to be there when it happens,” he said quietly. Neil turned away, but not before Andrew saw his smug smile.

"Yeah, of course I'll be there," Aaron said. A little bit of doubt eased out of Andrew and he let out a slow, quiet exhale so Aaron wouldn't hear he'd been a little concerned about rejection. Neil's knowing smile was telling, but Neil paid attention to Andrew's tells. He always knew.

"Cool, see you Saturday. Bye Aaron," Andrew said.

"Wait!"

"Hmm?"

"What do you want me to wear?" Aaron asked.

"I don't care what you wear," Andrew replied honestly. Neil made an unimpressed face. "Judging by the look on Neil's face, he doesn't care either."

"I just realised I'm going to need to organise what we wear. Can't we just wear our jerseys or something?" Neil said at the same time as Aaron spoke.

"Of course Neil doesn't care, he probably just wants you to wear your Lions' uniforms."

"No," Andrew said, although he wasn't sure which man he was talking to or if it was a general 'no' to the two of them thinking the same thing.

"So, who else is invited?" Aaron asked hesitantly.

"Have you asked Kevin yet?" Andrew asked Neil who shook his head, cracking eggs into a bowl. "Just you at the minute, you're the only one we've told. Kevin will get an invite soon. Neil seems to think it will be poetic to have our brothers as witnesses," Andrew answered his twin. Aaron's laugh cut off abruptly at the same time as Neil looked up with wide eyes.

"Aaron's going to be my brother-in-law," Neil groaned.

"Neil's going to be my brother-in-law," Aaron muttered at the same time. Andrew had to concentrate on keeping his mouth from falling open. Had the two of them always been this in sync?

"You should have thought about that before you said yes," he said, pointing at Neil. "And you should have thought of that before coming to me in juvie," he told Aaron.

"Shut up," Aaron shot back.

"Whatever," Neil said in the same tone.

"I've had enough of the pair of you. Bye Aaron," Andrew said. "Good luck with class," he added.

"Oh, thanks! Have fun at training or whatever later," Aaron replied. Andrew could sense his smile through the phone and hung up. Before Andrew could put the phone down or ask Neil why the hell he was making breakfast so late, Aaron's number blinked back to life as an incoming call.

"Did you forget to make a last scathing retort about my fiancé?" Andrew said into the phone when he answered. Neil snorted and wiped egg off his fingers.

"No, dickhead. I wanted to say congratulations," Aaron replied. Andrew didn't think he'd ever be able to explain the way those few words made him feel and he tapped his fingers against his mug as he swallowed against his chalky mouth.

"Thank you," he said eventually.

"And thanks for including me," Aaron mumbled.

"Okay," Andrew said.

"Okay," Aaron repeated. "Bye."

"Bye." Andrew hung up the phone and stared at it, waiting for it to ring back. It stayed quiet so he put it on the counter and looked at Neil again.

"Want to finish up here while I call Kevin?" Neil asked, gesturing at the deconstructed and uncooked omelette set up near the stove and waiting.

"Did you not eat when you got back from your run?" Andrew asked. Neil frowned and tilted his head.

"No, I did. I had oatmeal and fruit," he replied, pointing at the dish rack that held a bowl, glass and cutlery that hadn't been there when they went to sleep. Realisation dawned on Andrew a little late, but he blamed the strange call and the hour or two of over sleeping.

"This is for me," he said.

"Duh," Neil said with a laugh. "You just woke up. Also, I don't like most of these vegetables. Plus, you don't like cutting onions, so I figured I'd start while you were busy." Neil reached for his phone, but Andrew grabbed his hand before he could call Kevin and be distracted. Andrew was floored. Not because Neil had done something thoughtful and nice, or that he was providing Andrew with something, because Neil was fairly good at absently performing tasks like this before Andrew knew what was happening. Andrew was floored because he sometimes forgot to appreciate those moments. Neil never asked him to say thank you, never expected a reaction or an acknowledgment, he just did things because he gave a shit if Andrew ate something healthy when he woke up. Andrew had never explicitly mentioned how much he detested cutting onions, Neil had just paid attention and worked it out. Andrew did the same for Neil, making sure there were always cut strawberries in the fridge and they never ran out of that stupid protein powder that turns his drinks blue. It wasn't one sided, neither of them could live like that if it was, but Andrew sometimes forgot to pay attention.

"Drew?" Neil called, bringing him back down. Andrew let go and, with a smirk, did the stupid grabby hand movement that Neil did to him sometimes.

"Oh, it really is pathetic," Neil mused with a laugh, but he went around the counter to stand between Andrew's legs, arms around his waist and chin on his shoulder. Andrew put his arms around him and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

"Thank you," Andrew murmured into his hair. Neil responded by holding him a little bit tighter for a moment before pulling back.

"Alright, you eat, I'll convince Kevin to drive to Columbia from Palmetto," he said. Andrew handed him the phone and slid from his stool.

"Put him on speaker," Andrew said. Neil gave him a thumbs up and dialled out, taking Andrew's stool.

"Are you dying?" Kevin answered. Why were they like this?

"Nah, I just have a favour to ask you," Neil said.

"Oh? What is it?" Kevin sounded suspicious, which Andrew would have found offensive if it wasn't him and Neil calling.

"You're in South Carolina this coming weekend, yeah?"

"Yes? I told you that on Sunday," Kevin answered carefully.

"Right. Can you come down to Columbia on Saturday for eleven? We need you to sign some paperwork," Neil said. Andrew scoffed at ‘paperwork’ and turned to the stove to make food.

“First of all, I won’t have a car because I’m flying in…”

“Borrow Abby’s. Next excuse?” Neil interrupted.

“Okay, what paperwork- oh fucking shit, did one of you get arrested?” Kevin asked, sounding terrified. Andrew glanced over his shoulder and made eye contact with Neil, the two of them rolling their eyes; Andrew bored, and Neil amused.

“Our reputation precedes us,” Andrew said.

“Excuse me, out of the two of us, you are the only one who has been arrested,” Neil said, looking a little offended. Andrew didn’t know if he was being serious and quirked his eyebrow.

“Did you forget your freshman year?” Kevin demanded. Andrew pointed his spatula at the phone in agreement.

“What? The FBI didn’t arrest me! I was just… a witness with a history of running away,” Neil argued, the corner of his mouth twitching up in a smile.

“Were there handcuffs?” Kevin asked, as if being arrested was the only reason to use handcuffs. Andrew derailed his own train of thought and pushed the food around the frypan.

“Andrew was cuffed that day too, and he wasn’t arrested,” Neil pointed out.

“Okay, points were made,” Kevin conceded. “If neither of you have been arrested, then what is it you need me to sign? Has Andrew finally written a book?” His friend sounded smug, but Andrew groaned inwardly and promised himself he would show Kevin his middle finger when they saw each other next. Just because he had a story to tell, doesn’t mean he was the one who was going to write it. Maybe he’d let Heather write it, on the condition that she wrote him at least a foot taller.

“No, Drew hasn’t written a book and if you stopped playing twenty questions, I’d tell you,” Neil grumped.

“Okay, okay. What do you need me to drive all the way to Columbia just for my signature?” Kevin moaned.

“Fuck this, maybe just Aaron would be enough,” Neil mused. Andrew glanced over with a smirk, knowing Neil was appealing to Kevin’s narcissism and fear of being left out.

“Now, I’m curious. What the hell is going on?” Kevin asked, finally sounding serious.

“We need you to witness our wedding and sign the certificate,” Neil said. They were met with silence and Neil frowned, tapping his screen to make sure the call was still connected. Andrew flipped his omelette over and was grateful that it didn’t turn into scrambled eggs. “Kev?” Neil asked.

“Yeah, here. Are you being serious?” Kevin answered.

“Yeah, we’re getting married on Saturday,” Neil said tentatively. Andrew abandoned his food on the burner to reach across the counter for Neil’s hand. Neil held on, but the crease between his eyebrows didn’t smooth out.

“You and Andrew? Married? Properly?” Kevin demanded. Neil’s lips pressed thin and he shrugged helplessly, Andrew’s chest constricting at the thinly disguised hurt.

“Kevin,” Andrew said, not bothering to hide his warning. He did love Kevin, and one of the – admittedly few – regrets he had was hurting Kevin when Neil was missing in Baltimore, but he would not hesitate to read Kevin to filth if he hurt Neil right now.

“What? Oh! No, wait I am happy for you two, really! Congratulations! You’re two of my favourite people and this is great news, I will definitely borrow Abby’s car and be there, I promise, just text me the details. I just… fuck! I just lost so much fucking money in a Fox bet.” Kevin’s hurried compliment petered into a groan. Andrew rolled his eyes and went to rescue his breakfast.

“Why didn’t Aaron mention this?” Neil asked.

“We made this bet in the girls’ senior year, and it’s just kept growing over the last few years. Aaron didn’t want anything to do with it back then, we stopped asking,” Kevin explained.

“Okay, well we haven’t actually told anyone other than you and Aaron so…”

“Just delaying the inevitable loss of my money,” Kevin said, but he didn’t sound annoyed anymore. “Just me and Aaron huh?”

“Yeah, we need witnesses. Legally,” Neil answered.

“Are you going to tell everyone else?” Kevin asked. Andrew put his plate down on the counter and climbed into the stool next to Neil, pushing Neil’s laptop out of the way.

“They’ll find out eventually,” Neil dismissed. “But I will call Wymack and Abby later, let them know what’s up.”

“I will call Bee too,” Andrew agreed, trying to ignore the twist in his gut at the thought. He knew she would be happy and proud of him, but facing his decision to get married after years of telling Bee that relationships were a waste of time, he was not capable of love or being loved, and that marriage was a useless construct so what was the point? Obviously, for the most part, he’d been proven wrong thanks to the asshole he was now engaged to, but this was the biggest one yet.

“What about Nicky?” Kevin asked. Andrew grimaced.

“My cousin can’t keep his mouth shut to save his life, I won’t be telling him until ten years after we’re married,” Andrew deadpanned.

“Yeah, not until we’re retired,” Neil agreed. Andrew paused his mouthful of food near his mouth and frowned at him.

“You’ll be retired before you’re thirty-five, don’t push your luck,” Andrew told him. Both Kevin and Neil spluttered out protests, defending their illusion that their bodies won’t betray them. That wasn’t Andrew’s problem, so he went back to eating.

“He’s ignoring us,” Neil said eventually.

“Typical,” Kevin muttered. Andrew hummed and shoved a mouthful of food in his mouth so Neil wouldn’t see his amused smile.

“So, Saturday?” Neil hedged.

“Yeah, Saturday,” Kevin agreed. “I am happy for you both.”

“Could have fooled me,” Andrew drawled.

“Yeah, sorry about that. My reaction was not great. It was just surprising, and awesome guys. Thanks for asking me to come,” Kevin said.

“Sure. I’m hanging up now before this gets as soppy as Andrew and Aaron’s call,” Neil said. Andrew, unimpressed, flicked a glob of egg at Neil’s cheek. Neil, smug, wiped it off and put it back on Andrew’s plate.

“Bye bro, see you Saturday!” Kevin said. “And text me the details!”

“Au revoir, Kev,” Neil replied before disconnecting the call, correctly assuming Andrew wasn’t going to say anything. Neil spun the phone around on the countertop, watching as Andrew pushed his food around his plate, and Andrew ignored the attention.  
“We’ll call our parents after training?” Neil suggested. It seemed like as good an idea as any so he nodded his head and pushed Neil’s face away because he didn’t want him watching him eat.

*

“I’m getting married,” Andrew said without preamble. He’d stared at his phone for about fifteen minutes after Neil had hung up the call from Wymack and Abby, his fingers trembling uncomfortably as he considered calling Bee and he couldn’t even understand why. She was going to be happy and proud – he knew that deep down in his bones – but he hadn’t been able to press the button. Neil had to take the phone and dial out, pushing Andrew in the hip and thigh until he got to his feet and took the phone back as it rang. Andrew was sitting on their back porch, his knees hugged to his chest and phone pressed to his ear held so tightly in his hand that he was a little concerned he would break it.

“Oh Andrew, that’s wonderful!” Bee gushed. Andrew’s chest felt as if it was constricting just at the sheer happiness in her voice. She was happy for him, and happy because of him, and he didn’t know what to do with that. “Honey, are you alright?” Bee asked softly after the silence dragged on a little too long.

“Yes,” Andrew answered. He was alright, he just didn’t know what he was doing.

“Are you happy?” She asked. A loaded question, really, and one people had taken to asking him over the years.

“I think so,” Andrew allowed. “At least, happier than I ever thought I could be.”

“Good, I’m proud of you,” she said fondly. Andrew felt small. He felt like a child, which was not something he’d ever liked feeling, but with Betsy it was okay.

“I didn’t want to tell you,” Andrew admitted. “I did, but I didn’t.”

“Oh? Why’s that?” Bee asked, not sounding at all offended. Andrew didn’t answer her, he didn’t really have a good enough understanding on the reason to explain. “You don’t know, and that’s why you told me,” she guessed.

“Yeah,” Andrew confirmed.

“Did you think I would react badly?”

“No,” Andrew said quickly. He could sense her smile through the phone and he closed his eyes tightly.

“You knew I would be happy,” she said, understanding colouring her tone.

“Yeah.”

“Honey, you do deserve it. Me caring about you, being happy because of you, and excited for this new chapter in your life. I’m allowed to love you, and you, Andrew Minyard, are allowed to be okay with that,” she said gently. Andrew tensed up as if his body could physically stop her words from breaking through. Andrew let Neil love him, he’d even let in Aaron, Kevin, apparently Dan and her child, but it was so much harder to accept Bee’s fondness sometimes. It was terrifying, always had been, to let her in. Part of him was still waiting for the day when she gave up. She never did as his therapist, and it had been her who kept in contact with him since he’d graduated, but he was waiting. He would always be waiting for her to walk away, turn her back and pretend she never knew him. Maybe that was why telling her about the good things could be so hard sometimes. Sharing the good things with someone you were expecting to hurt you ran the risk of those good things being tainted in pain. Andrew knew this, the few good things he’d had in his life before Palmetto were tainted in pain and soaked in bad memories.

“So you keep saying,” Andrew said.

“And I will always say,” she promised. “So, do you want to tell me about how this all came about?”

“I asked him to marry me yesterday. Apparently, he’d already known I was going to ask, but that was probably for the best because then he didn’t need to freak out about it in the moment.”

“Ah, yes, our resident commitment-phobe and house-trained runaway,” Bee teased, using the terms for Neil that Andrew had used in their sessions over the years. He smiled for the first time since training.

“He said yes, so…” he trailed off, smile growing a little more and he pressed his face against his legs. It was chilly outside, the bite of late September coming in as autumn raged on in the Windy City, and Andrew wished he’d reached for his coat or grabbed a blanket on his way out the backdoor because the hoodie they were fighting a custody battle over was not doing its job.

“He did say yes, which is good because Chicago is too far away for me to hunt him down,” Bee mused, earning an amused huff out of Andrew.

“He’s well versed in disappearing Bee. If he’d said no, I don’t think any of us would have found him,” Andrew said.

“Neil is out of practice,” Bee disagreed. “Have you guys decided on when or where or any of the important questions?”

“Saturday in Columbia. Town hall wedding with Aaron and Kevin as witnesses. Apart from Neil telling Abby and Coach, no one else knows.”

“Small and discrete,” she noted. “Short engagement too,” she teased.

“Would you believe me if I said this was Neil’s idea?” Andrew asked, lifting his head when he heard the backdoor open. Neil made a face at being blamed for something, but he held out the fluffy navy-blue blanket anyway. “Thank you,” Andrew said, and Neil draped it over his shoulders, kissed him on the cheek and went back inside while Bee answered him.

“I believe it, but only because I can’t imagine you having much of an opinion on the actual wedding,” Bee said.

“I have one opinion,” he said. “I just didn’t realise it was an opinion until the threat of it not being there was real.”

“Let me guess, Neil said something about no dessert?”

“No cake, Bee. Neil said no to cake at our wedding. Can you believe I am marrying that man?” He complained. She laughed and he wrapped the blanket tighter around himself.

“Well, did you explain how strongly you felt about having cake?” She asked, diplomatic as always.

“We had a small chat about it, and he promised he would give me cake,” he answered.

“Then yes, I can believe you’re marrying that man,” Bee said lightly. Andrew groaned, but the smile had attached itself to his face now and he was warm and safe, and he felt small in a good way. He felt loved, and understood, and cared about. With Bee, that feeling didn’t come with a price tag, and as much as he was expecting it to not last forever, how he would never get used to it, when he had moments like these, he wanted to hold on to them.

Andrew stayed outside talking to Bee for nearly an hour, only hanging up when she said that she had to go to sleep, and when he went back inside Neil was on the couch watching Adventure Time with Sir curled on his stomach and King behind his knees.  
“Give me my cat back,” Andrew said, reaching out to take King who _brrp_ ’d and pressed his forehead into Andrew’s shoulder.

“How about giving you your fiancé back?” Neil asked, sliding down the couch so Andrew could sit in his favourite spot. Andrew ignored that and when he was comfortable with King having squished himself between Andrew and the arm of the couch, Neil put his head on Andrew’s legs and smiled sleepily up at him. Andrew leaned down to kiss him gently and Neil sighed softly.

“Bee asked me tonight if I was happy,” Andrew said. Neil hummed in encouragement for him to continue. “I don’t think I was built for happiness to fit in my body properly, but I’m as close to it as I will ever be.”

“Me too, but there is still a lot of time left,” Neil said quietly, bringing their intertwined hands to his lips and kissing the back of Andrew’s hand. Time. In a weird way, Andrew had always felt a sense of control over time. If the years stretched out ahead of him too far, he’d always taken comfort in the fact that he could cut it short. He didn’t find that comforting anymore, but that was okay because the fact that time seemed to stretch endlessly before them didn’t seem quite so terrifying anymore. One step after another and Andrew would keep trying for as long as he could.

*

Andrew woke up to King walking across his stomach and mewling sadly. He sighed and opened his eyes to look up into his cat’s face.  
“You don’t have to be so sad, Columbia isn’t that bad,” Andrew mumbled, lifting his sleep-heavy hand to pet the tabby.

“Both of you be quiet,” Neil grumbled, rolling over so his back was to Andrew, and pulled Sir to his chest. Sir started purring straight away and Neil put his face in his cat’s fur. The four of them had arrived at the Columbia house in the evening the day before, having driven all Friday with the cats. Andrew had expected Neil to ask if they could fly, but it had been Neil’s idea to drive because he wanted to bring the cats with them for the weekend.  
“We’re getting married today,” Neil murmured to Sir.

“I hope you two will be very happy together,” Andrew drawled. Neil made an unamused noise and kicked out with his leg. Andrew smirked and put his hand in the back of Neil’s hair, tugging on the mussed curls until Neil moaned and let his head fall back. Andrew kissed the corner of his mouth before getting out of bed, scooping King into his arms as he went.

“Babe!” Neil whined, dragging the word out. Andrew paused and looked down at him, putting his lips against the top of King’s head. “Where are you going?”

“We’re getting married in two hours, I thought breakfast would be a good idea,” Andrew answered. “Don’t you want to go for a run?”

“Not even a little bit,” Neil said, rolling back over to look at him. Andrew reached for his own pillow and threw it at him, making Sir leap from the bed and Neil laughed.

“Come help me make food then,” Andrew said, letting go of King so he could chase his sister out of the room. Neil scrambled around for his boxers and Andrew caught a pair that sailed towards his head and pulled them on a split second before Neil was launching himself off Andrew’s old bed. Andrew caught him with a grunt and immediately threw him back onto the mattress. Neil’s laugh filled the room as he bounced up to his knees and held his arms out. Andrew shook his head and stepped forward to wrap his arms around Neil’s back and pick him back up to deposit him on his feet.

“We’re getting married,” Neil said with a smile. Andrew kissed him hard and Neil wound his arms around him to hold him close. Andrew bit his lip gently and Neil smiled, pulling away. “Breakfast?”

“Breakfast,” Andrew agreed, letting Neil lead him down his old home’s stairs and into the kitchen.

They made breakfast together, listening to a playlist Will had made specifically for their day as a wedding gift, and every time Neil danced around the kitchen, Andrew smiled and watched. Andrew was still a little grateful that Heather and Will had been so accepting of their request for a private ceremony.  
Neil slid his arm around Andrew’s waist from behind and smeared Nutella on Andrew’s nose, smiling against his cheek. Andrew wiped it off with the kitchen towel on the counter in front of him, before digging his spoon in the jar and dabbing it on Neil’s cheek, turning in his embrace to lick it off. Neil’s noise was equal parts disgust and amusement and Andrew smirked around the Nutella in his mouth. Neil put his hands on either side of Andrew’s face and kissed him, his tongue chasing the chocolate spread.  
“We should get ready,” Neil said into his mouth. “If Kevin and Aaron beat us to the hall…”

“Yeah, I know,” Andrew agreed. Aaron and Kevin had never really spent a lot of time with each other alone and whenever they did, it could only really be described as awkward from what Andrew had seen.

“Come on, let’s have a shower,” Neil said. Andrew looked at the mess they’d made of the kitchen, but Neil put his fingers under his chin and brought his attention back to his face. “Who cares? Let’s go,” he said. Andrew rolled his eyes, but Neil took that as agreement and prodded him in the direction back towards the stairs and the bathroom. They really didn’t have a lot of time, but when Neil put his back against the cold, wet tiles, his curls falling over his forehead and his hands pulling Andrew against him, time didn’t matter for a little while.

*

Andrew sat on the hood of his car, waiting for Neil to lock the front door. They were both wearing denim jeans- Andrew’s skinny and black, Neil’s loose and dark blue- and button-down white shirts.  
“Aren’t we not supposed to see each other before the ceremony?” Neil asked as he came down the front steps. Andrew slid from the car with an eyeroll.

“There isn’t a bride in this dynamic,” he deadpanned. Neil made a face at him but didn’t say anything as he climbed into the car. Andrew followed his lead and got in behind the wheel, Neil’s hand immediately landing on his thigh.

They were five minutes from the venue when Neil dug his fingers into Andrew's thigh in a panic.  
"I didn't get the rings!" He yelped. Andrew put his hand on Neil's and pried his fingernails out of the denim until he'd loosened his grip.

"I've got them," he said. He'd slipped them into his pocket after their shower so they wouldn't get left behind, and only now did he think he should have maybe mentioned that to Neil.

"You told me to organise the wedding and I forgot the most important part," he moaned. Andrew let go of his hand and reached out to put his own against the back of Neil’s neck. Neil willingly dropped his head forward at the weight.

"But I didn't forget, and you did organise the wedding," he said. Neil made an agreeable noise and after a minute, Andrew let go to change gears and Neil's hand found Andrew's leg again.

"Thank you for remembering," Neil said. Andrew snorted because remembering was the least difficult thing for him to do. His amusement melted into surprise when he pulled into the carpark out the front of the building and caught sight of their idiot brothers standing together on the front steps.

"What the fuck are they wearing?" Neil asked, leaning forward as if to see better through the windscreen.

"Suits," Andrew answered, stating the obvious. Both men were wearing expensive looking, sharp, tailored black suits and white shirts. Kevin's skinny tie and pocket square was red while Aaron's were green- Neil and Andrew's favourite colours. Neil shot Andrew a bewildered look before looking down at his jeans and laughing.

"I guess I didn't tell them the dress code," he mused.

"You didn't. I did," Andrew replied because he distinctly remembered sending Kevin a text that told him to dress casual. "I do not think they cared."

"Suppose not," Neil agreed. "Ready?" He had his hand on the door handle, his eyes dancing, and Andrew let out a quiet sigh. Neil was so ready, happy even, to be walking in there and marrying him. When did this happen? When did Andrew get to have this? Why did he get to have Neil? Andrew nodded his head. He'd offered Neil a part of himself a long time ago, found himself silently promising forever because he'd known back in that first tumultuous school year that he would love Neil until he died. He'd tried to talk himself out of it, reminded himself that his interests never lasted, that the flames died, and that Neil was dangerous. It hadn't mattered.

"I'm ready," he said. Neil smiled and pushed open his car door, Andrew did the same and locked the Maserati behind them.

"Salut frère!" Neil said, climbing the steps. Kevin pulled him in for a hug, eyes fond as he ruffled Neil's curls.

"You look ridiculous," Andrew said to Aaron. His twin just rolled his eyes. "Isn't there a rule about not upstaging the people getting married?"

"Not upstaging a bride maybe, but we figured you wouldn't care," Aaron shot back. Andrew couldn't argue with that because he didn't care.

"Did you two go shopping together?" Neil asked from Kevin's side. Aaron looked down at his new shoes and didn't speak, but he nodded.

"Since when were you two buddy-buddy?" Andrew asked, poking Aaron in the ribs.

"It's not like we hate each other," Aaron muttered.

"You hate everything," Neil piped up.

"Piss off, Josten," Aaron grumbled, but there was no bite or heat in his voice.

"I just changed my plans with Dad," Kevin said quickly, hand on Neil's shoulder. "I flew in here yesterday morning and Aaron picked me up so we could get these. I stayed on his and Kate's couch last night, but I'll head home to Dad's tonight," he explained. It still didn't make all that much sense to Andrew, but with a deep breath and counting to ten, he let it go and saw Neil do the same.

"Are we doing this or not?" Aaron asked, reaching for the door handle and yanking it open. Andrew followed him in, Neil and Kevin bringing up the rear as the little entourage landed in a foyer with a reception desk. A woman dressed in neat, business attire looked up at their entrance and while Kevin kept Neil trapped with history facts about the old building, Andrew and Aaron walked forward to sign in or whatever.

"Hello, can I help you?" The lady asked, tucking a graying blonde streak of hair behind her ear and tapping a pen against her notepad.

"Minyard-Josten wedding," Aaron said. Andrew frowned at his twin, not used to him taking charge or even just wanting to help. Aaron artfully avoided his gaze and pretended it wasn't happening.

"Oh wonderful, if you just want to wait out here the celebrant will collect you," she said. Andrew and Aaron pushed away from the desk and walked towards the brothers lingering near a velvety sofa and a weird flower arrangement in a floor vase. Andrew put an arm out and stopped Aaron halfway there, chewing on the inside of his cheek. Aaron raised an eyebrow and waited as Andrew dug in his pockets for the box of rings.

"Think you can manage not to lose these and bring them out at the right time?" He asked. Aaron's eyes went wide, but he took the box and nodded his head.

"How will I know which one to give to who?" He asked, sliding the box into the inside pocket of his suit jacket.

"Give me Neil's, it's the one on the chain," Andrew explained. Aaron didn't ask why Neil's was on a chain, just nodded again and fell into step beside Andrew as they rounded on Neil and Kevin.

"Won't be too long," Aaron said. Neil smiled and Kevin perched his lanky frame on the back of the sofa. Andrew made sure not to go too close to it, remembering the way the other velvety couch had felt against his skin.

"So, this is actually happening," Kevin said, a teasing smile on his face. "Never thought I'd see the day."

"Shut up, Kev," Neil said, using all his might to try and topple Kevin backwards over the couch, but the taller man just dug his nails and feet in and held on while he laughed.

"Children, stop!" Aaron moaned.

"Is this the part where you walk away and pretend you don't know us?" Neil asked, referencing every moment in college where Kevin, Neil, Nicky and Andrew had embarrassed Aaron with their disregard of social normalities and disdain for respectful behaviour.

"God, I wish," Aaron replied. Andrew smirked and held his hand out for Neil, willing to reign his fiancé in for the sake of Aaron's sanity just this once. Neil rolled his eyes, reading Andrew's intention, but took his hand and stood at Andrew's side, letting Aaron take post at Kevin's. Andrew didn't let his wince in unneeded sympathy show on his face when Aaron's hands touched the couch.

"Tell them what you were telling me before they got here," Kevin said, nudging Aaron before the silence could drag on into what they would consider awkward. This group could normally stand around in silence, whether it be sullen or studious or stubborn, but because of the very nature of the day, Aaron and Kevin seemed to want to try. Andrew and Neil wouldn't stand in the way of it, even if they didn't care either way.

"So, we've started doing some practical stuff on cadavers now that I've started doing some of my surgical units, and last week was our first session in the morgue. Everyone was acting extremely weird, either too curious and twitchy or all sweaty and nervous. I couldn't figure out why, because I wasn't feeling anything other than annoyed the class was being held at the teaching hospital and not on campus. Then I remembered normal people haven't seen a dead person before. The teacher, keep in mind she's being doing this for years, seemed to know this and called everyone up in pairs to get a good look at the cadaver to ease their curiosity or desensitize them or whatever," Aaron waved a hand around, and Andrew could tell where this was going. "So, she calls my name and I just tell her that I'm fine. Everyone starts telling me it's better to look now before we start working, and others are telling me not to be scared and I just didn't know how to tell them that I've already seen a dead body," he said. Neil snorted derisively, which was juxtaposed to the way his fingers tightened around Andrew's at the reference to Drake and Luther's house. Andrew didn't mind, hearing Aaron talk about it was more a good thing than a bad thing in Andrew's opinion because at least he wasn't shivering and pale at the memories of the day.

"Seen a dead body? You created one," Neil said. Aaron just held his middle finger up and continued on.

"Anyway, my professor told me again to come have a look, so I did, and it was some middle aged white dude and I just, well it wasn't as weird to me as everyone was making it out to be and I obviously didn't react or say anything and people started asking questions. In the end, I just had to say that it wasn't the first time I'd seen a dead guy."

"They're just lesser evolved beings," Kevin quipped.

"I don't understand the morbid fascination that surrounds death and dead bodies," Neil admitted, pulling his hand out of Andrew's to mess with his curls.

"Normal people don't witness death frequently in their childhoods," Andrew reminded him. Not a single one of the four of them was entirely innocent in that fact- even if Kevin had never aimed a gun and pulled the trigger or plunged the knife (or yanked the wheel), he'd seen and witnessed enough murder and murder scenes to understand.

"This is morbid conversation," Kevin noted.

"You started it!" Aaron snapped. Neil flashed a small grin at his brother and shrugged.

"Perhaps a little, but it is neutral territory," he teased.

"That's horrifying," Aaron said, but he didn't disagree.

"Isn't it just?" Andrew deadpanned.

"Shouldn't we talk about, like, something nice? Celebratory?" Kevin asked, again seeming to ignore the fact that the cadaver talk was because of him.

"If you want to talk about unicorns farting rainbows, be our guest," Andrew said, maintaining a neutral tone. Kevin rolled his eyes, but surprisingly enough both Aaron and Neil laughed.

"Gentlemen? Are you the Minyard-Josten wedding party?" A man's voice asked just as Kevin and Aaron's heads lifted like dogs pricking their ears at the presence behind Andrew and Neil.

"Yep," Neil said, turning around. Andrew followed suit and came face to face with a tall, whippity thin man wearing black, round glasses and a big, toothy smile.

"Wonderful! I'm Luka Houston, I'll be officiating the wedding today. Just follow me," he said. Aaron and Kevin got off the sofa and Andrew matched Neil's step down a hallway led by Luka. The room wasn't that big, a couple seats for guests, a small raised dais at the front and a table off to the side.

"So can the grooms stand here," Luka said, gesturing for Kevin and Aaron to step forward onto the dais. Kevin blanched and Aaron's ears went pink and the pair of them took big steps back. Andrew rolled his eyes and took Neil's hand to pull him forward, stepping onto the two-inch platform.

"Guys, seriously? Get it together," Neil complained. Andrew followed his line of sight and saw Kevin and Aaron staring at each other with awkwardly fidgeting hands and shifting feet. Aaron's cheeks and ears were still pink with embarrassment. Andrew opened his mouth to snap at them and ask what the hell was happening, but closed his mouth again, deciding some things just weren't worth knowing. He'd lived with their awkwardness for a long time, now wasn't any different.

"We are the grooms, they are just two mildly inconvenient witnesses," Andrew told Luka drily.

"Hey!" Kevin complained.

"You asked me to be here," Aaron added. Andrew and Neil shared an amused glance but didn't otherwise react to their brothers.

“Okay, well, shall we get started?” Luka encouraged in his overly happy voice. Andrew and Neil nodded, and Andrew waited to feel a shiver of anxiety in his stomach as Neil took his hand again and Luka opened his notebook, but it didn’t come. He was mildly uncomfortable at being somewhat in the centre of attention, and his skin was crawling at being vulnerable and open, but the fact that at the end of this he was going to be married to Neil just made him feel calm. Knowing that in the case of an emergency, he’d be allowed into his murder magnet’s hospital room, it took a weight off his chest. Neil was the only person in this world that could love Andrew as he had been back when they met, who he was now, and who he will grow to be. And, what made it even better, he loved Neil too. There was nothing he could do about it, no matter how hard he’d tried, so when the celebrant asked…

“I do,” Andrew said.

“I do,” Neil agreed in turn. Aaron, for his part, handed the rings over at the right time and Neil turned for Andrew to clip his on and then slipped Andrew’s ring on his finger. Andrew spent the rest of the ceremony twisting his ring around his finger, until they were asked to kiss, and he put both his hands on Neil’s familiarly scarred cheeks as he kissed him. Neil kissed him back, his hands on Andrew’s hips, Andrew felt him smile and they pulled back. Officially husbands. They sat next to each other at the small table with Kevin and Aaron on the opposite side and the four of them signed the necessary paperwork.

“That was… quite honestly painless,” Aaron admitted as they walked out of the room towards the foyer.

“I was expecting it to take longer than twenty-five minutes,” Neil agreed, linking his hand with Andrew.

“Do you feel any different?” Kevin asked, pushing the front door open.

“Not a bit,” Neil said with a smile.

“Was I supposed to?” Andrew drawled. Nothing had changed, he just had a weight around his ring finger.

“You’re both impossible,” Kevin moaned. Andrew ignored that and Neil just pulled a face at him. “What are your plans for the rest of the day?”

“Hmm, it’s eleven thirty so… lunch?” Neil asked, looking at Andrew with his eyebrow raised. Andrew glanced up at the sky where angry grey clouds were gathering.

“It’s going to rain,” he noted. “Takeaway, hot chocolates and Criminal Minds?”

“I’ve been watching Adventure Time,” Neil said.

“Oh, I like Adventure Time,” Andrew agreed, not at all ashamed to admit that in present company. Neil grinned and nodded, turning to Kevin with a gesture that said _answer your question?_ Aaron and Kevin were gaping at them.

“You just got married and you’re going to get hot chocolates and watch cartoons?” Aaron asked.

“With our cats,” Neil added.

“Can we, I don’t, come hang out for a bit? Eat lunch with you?” Kevin asked. Andrew narrowed his eyes at his friend. He was a good actor, a smart man with years of experience lying, but he couldn’t lie to Andrew. He shifted his weight a bit and he couldn’t make eye contact, exactly like now.

“Hey, baby?” Andrew said, taking his keys out of his pocket. “Go start the car? You can drive if you want to.”

“Sure,” Neil agreed easily, snatching the keys. Andrew watched him go before he was out of earshot and rounded on his brother and his friend.

“What the fuck have you two done?” He demanded.

“What?”

“Nothing!”

“Yeah, nothing!”

“Kevin, you’re not good at lying to Andrew,” Aaron groaned. Andrew curled his fingers into a fist to stop himself from shaking the pair of them.

“Aaron,” Andrew warned. “What have you two done?”

“Abby, Coach and Dr. Dobson are at the Columbia house making lunch,” Aaron admitted. Andrew opened his mouth. Closed it. Thought about how that sentence made him feel. Opened it again.

“First of all, I hate you both. Second of all, we left the kitchen in a mess,” he said. Kevin, who had taken a small step back, snorted at that.

“Dad will probably be made to clean it up,” he said. Andrew nodded slowly and sighed, rubbing his temple. His stomach twisted at the idea of being the centre of attention at lunch, but he did like the idea of seeing Betsy while he was in South Carolina and he could imagine Neil’s smile when Abby and Wymack greeted him.

“We didn’t tell anyone you haven’t already told, and we only invited those three for lunch,” Aaron said. “I haven’t even told Katelyn,” he promised. Andrew was genuinely surprised and sent him a funny look.

“I don’t care if you told Katelyn,” he said. “I wouldn’t care if she was there either,” he added carefully. It was the truth, Katelyn was so far below Andrew’s radar that he thought it inconsequential if she knew, but he did know it would make Aaron happy if she was at whatever party they had organised. He rubbed his temple again, wondering when it was that he’d started to care about Aaron actually being happy and not just surviving. The Maserati beeping snapped Andrew’s head up and he saw Neil in the driver’s seat with a small smile and he pressed the horn again. Okay, maybe he’d started caring about Aaron being happy when Andrew had started wanting to be happy too. He looked at his brother again. “Call your girlfriend and invite her. See you at the house,” he said. Aaron’s face broke into a grin, but Andrew didn’t stick around for a thank you and walked to his car and his husband.

“What was that about?” Neil asked, putting the car in gear.

“I hate them,” Andrew answered.

“I know,” Neil said sarcastically. “Are they coming over for lunch? Because I didn’t get to say goodbye to Kevin otherwise…”

“They will meet us there,” Andrew assured him. Neil smiled as he pulled out of the carpark.

They didn’t speak as they headed to the house, just let the radio fill the car with Andrew absentmindedly touching the curls at the back of Neil’s head, his gaze out the passenger side window. This was probably why Neil spotted the cars in the driveway first while Andrew drank from a water bottle with half lidded eyes.

"Is that Betsy's car? The one you bought her for her birthday last year?" Neil asked. Andrew didn't need to look to know it would be, but he swallowed and opened his eyes anyway.

"Yes, and that's Coach's car," Andrew agreed, sighting the familiar four-wheel drive on the curb. Neil pulled into the driveway and cut off the engine before speaking, but he smiled, albeit shyly.

"I think I know why you hate our brothers," he mused. Andrew just drank another mouthful of water. "Where are they?"

"Kevin and my face thief?" Andrew asked after swallowing. Neil took the bottle and nodded his head around the mouthpiece. "I would guess they're picking up Katelyn," Andrew said. Neil's eyebrows rose and he swallowed loudly as he handed the drink back. "Don't look at me like that, I don't care enough about Katelyn to be bothered by her presence."

"Maybe so, but you care about Aaron," Neil said, mouth pinched to ward off a smile.

"Let's face the music," Andrew said, changing the subject not at all subtly. Neil laughed and climbed out of the car.

"You make it sound like a bad thing," he observed.

"I haven't decided if this is good or not," he said. This statement was further proven by the bubble of nerves in his stomach as he turned to face the house. Neil held his hand out in question and Andrew tangled their fingers together, the ring an unfamiliar- but not unwelcome- object between them. They walked up to the front door together and Neil unlocked it with Andrew's key still in his hand before pushing the door open with his foot and tossing Andrew the keys to catch with his right hand. They were barely in the door when Abby descended on Neil.

“Neil! Congratulations!” She cried, sounding scarily close to tears. Andrew took a neat step away, dropping his keys on the table inside the door and met Wymack's gaze from where he stood leaning against the kitchen door frame. Wymack smiled a genuine, fond smile, and inclined his head at Andrew in acknowledgement. Andrew nodded back, the understanding between them solid even after all these years – Wymack didn't parent or dominate Andrew, and Andrew respected him in turn. Speaking of parents, Bee was standing in the hallway between the kitchen and the front door, smiling serenely. Andrew realised with a jolt that she'd been crying. She gestured behind her at the den and Andrew scooted around Abby who was still hugging Neil and showering him in affection as he stayed limp in her arms with a look of mild shock on his face. Andrew followed Bee into the den and she quietly shut the door behind them before turning to face him.

"You've been crying," he noted. She smiled and pressed the pads of her thumbs under her eyes as if to check the truth of his observation. He'd seen Bee cry a few times over the years, as she'd grown to care for him more as family than as a patient and the more he'd opened up to her, the more she'd cried for him and what he'd suffered through. He'd always been able to know what it was that made her cry her silent tears, but he didn't know what had made her cry now. "Is it because you weren't invited to the wedding?" He guessed. Her laugh was soft and surprised as she shook her head.

"No, Andrew, I'm just so proud and so happy," she said. "May I hug you?" She asked. Andrew nodded his head and stepped into her embrace, linking his hands behind her back and pressing his face into her shoulder. She was soft and warm, and she held him around the shoulders and the back of the head like she wouldn't let him go. Andrew breathed in deeply, letting himself find comfort in her hug. She smelled like the lemony polish she used on her glass figurines and her fabric softener, which was familiar and steady to Andrew and always made him feel safe. He tucked his chin to his chest, and she kissed the top of his head, making him feel small and cared about. He silently took back his comment in the driveway, having Bee here was a good thing.  
Andrew pulled back a few moments later when he heard the front door being opened and closed, peering past Bee towards the room door as if he’d be able to know who had come in.

“I think Aaron and Kevin are here,” he said.

“I was wondering where they’d gotten to,” she said. Andrew knew she would have something to say to his answer, but he said it anyway.

“They went to get Katelyn,” he told her. She smiled and squeezed his shoulder gently as she reached for the door to let them out.

“That was nice of you,” she said. Andrew huffed and left the room. He wasn’t nice, people were getting the wrong idea about him. He walked towards the kitchen with his mouth open to say something scathing just to prove a point to himself, but came up short when he saw that that it wasn’t Kevin and Aaron who had returned, but instead Neil was now holding a large white, square box and with a grin on his face.

“What is that?” He asked.

“Cake!” Neil said proudly. “I promised you,” he added, voice a little quieter. He put the box on the counter and opened it to reveal a large, plain cake with white icing and in chocolate icing was a drawing of a rope being tied in a knot.

“Tying the knot?” Andrew observed, shaking his head, but there was a small appreciative smile on his face because his husband was an _idiot,_ but he was his husband and he wasn’t going to be over that anytime soon. Neil looked so unbelievably proud of himself and Andrew rolled his eyes but put his hand on the small of his back gently.

“Did you know we were coming?” Wymack asked from where he stood in the doorway still.

“No,” Neil laughed.

“Then why is it so big?” Abby asked, eyes widening at the realisation that Neil had bought the entire cake just for the two of them. Andrew was a little curious about that too, because it was enough dessert for a party.

“Did you think we would eat that entire thing?” Andrew asked. Neil just shrugged.

“I figured you would do your best,” he said. Andrew’s laugh surprised most everyone in the room, including himself, but he didn’t try to disguise it or take it back.

“You’re an idiot,” he said. Neil nodded and closed the lid on the cakebox.

“Whatever we weren’t going to eat we could have taken to Heather and Will’s on Monday,” he admitted. “Jackson might need it if you want him to talk to you again,” he teased, turning around to face the room. The entire house smelled heavily like Abby’s lasagne and homemade garlic bread, and Andrew could see it in the oven when he turned too, with three big bowls of different salads on the counter near her elbow where she stood. Betsy raised an eyebrow at him in question to Neil’s comment and Andrew sighed.

“Jackson is my friend back home,” he explained, more for Abby and Wymack’s benefit in case they’d forgotten him from the Championship, but he knew Bee would remember. “Earlier in the week, he invited Neil and I to a movie premiere that was playing today, and I said that we would be busy getting married…” he trailed off to let them fill in the blanks.

“And he got shitty that he wasn’t invited,” Wymack said.

“At first,” Neil said. “He did come around when we explained that it was just going to be us and our brothers, but he was still annoyed we didn’t tell him we were engaged.”

“Heather, Will and Jackson made us promise to have dinner with them on Monday to celebrate or something,” Andrew explained, gesturing at the cake.

“We still haven’t told any teammates, past or present, because that would just make it a big thing and Nicky would be on the first flight over and Allison would start organising a party and that’s just…” Neil blew out a loud breath and made a face with wide eyes. “Too much for now.”

“Don’t bother inviting us to that shindig, I am getting too old to deal with all of you in one place,” Wymack said. Andrew smiled at him, amusement pressing behind his chest.

“You and me both, Coach,” he said. Judging by Wymack’s smile, he remembered the last time they’d had a very similar conversation – as Andrew was being led to the psychiatric hospital. That day felt so long ago, and in the grand scheme of things it _was_ so long ago, and so much had happened since then. It was that day that Neil had given Andrew his middle name and pressed his hand to the scars on his abdomen that were now as familiar to Andrew as his own. Before anyone could speak, the front door opened and this time, unfortunately, it wasn’t cake delivery.

“Has anyone seen our cats?” Neil asked as Aaron, Kevin and Katelyn appeared in the doorway and Wymack stepped out of their way.

“The white one saw us and ran up the stairs like its tail was on fire,” Wymack said over Kevin’s head.

“That’s Neil’s cat,” Andrew said by way of explanation, earning a pinch in his ribs.

“Well, the tabby started hissing and spitting at us until Betsy gained his trust and got him upstairs,” Abby said with a sly grin.

“And that would be Andrew’s cat,” Neil replied, dancing out of Andrew’s reach to Abby’s side.

Lunch was a messy affair, everyone bunched up around the dining room table that wasn’t meant to seat this many people, but it was a familiar chaos that reminded Andrew of summers in Abby’s house and weekends in Columbia. Andrew stayed mostly quiet, cutting his food up small and fidgeting with the crust of the garlic bread that he’d pulled off. He relinquished the crusts onto Aaron’s plate in front of him and Neil’s beside him as the pair of them bickered over something Andrew had missed the point of. Neil alternated between playfully arguing with Kevin, sort of properly arguing with Aaron, and listening to Abby and Wymack talk, but every time Andrew glanced at his husband, he saw him smiling and running the ring along the chain around his neck.  
When it came time to cut the cake, everyone asked Andrew and Neil to do it together and after Neil’s shuffling and discomfort at being the centre of attention and Andrew not wanting to do as he was told, they stood together with their hands on the same knife to cut the cake while Betsy took photos- the only one who had been allowed to. Andrew was pleasantly surprised that inside the cake it was different layers with buttercream in the middle, and each layer was a different colour of the rainbow. Before Andrew could comment, Neil was smearing icing on his mouth and ducking away before Andrew could retaliate. Abby and Betsy started yelling at Andrew that he was still holding the knife and to put it down before he chased after Neil so he threw it up in the air, caught it again and dropped it back in the box before digging his fingers into the icing and running up the stairs after Neil. He could hear Neil laughing in Andrew’s old bedroom and he pushed the door open to reveal Neil lying on the bed with King and Sir prowling around him.  
“No! Have mercy!” Neil shrieked, grinning from ear to ear as Andrew kicked the door shut behind him and stalked into the room. He hadn’t licked the icing off his own mouth yet and the urge was strong, but his will was stronger as he climbed onto the bed and pinned Neil down who was still giggling like a fool in love. Andrew, firstly, smeared the goo of his fingers onto Neil’s mouth and his husband parted his lips to lick it off and then Andrew pressed their lips together. Happiness was building up inside Andrew’s stomach in a way he couldn’t remember ever feeling and even though their faces and fingers were sticky and they were smiling too much to kiss properly, and most of their family was downstairs, Andrew finally understood what people meant about being so happy you could cry. He screwed his eyes shut and held it back and kissed Neil until their lips were numb, but he understood.

“You should know better than to ask me for mercy,” Andrew said when he pulled back. Neil looked up at him, eyes shining and a stupid smile on his face and Andrew hated it when he looked at him like that because it made him feel like the earth was dissolving under his feet but fuck, he loved this man.

“You think you’re so funny, Andrew Minyard,” Neil said, shaking his head so his auburn curls fell to his forehead.

“I think that you think I’m funny, Neil Josten,” Andrew parroted back.

“I think that you love me, Andrew Minyard,” Neil said quietly. The world dissolved again, and Andrew clung onto the pillow under Neil’s head as he pressed a kiss to Neil’s temple.

“I know that you love me, Neil Josten,” he murmured.

*

Betsy was the last to leave and Andrew walked her out as the sun touched the horizon. He leaned into her hug goodbye and when she pulled back, she put her hand on his cheek and kissed his forehead softly.  
“I have told you so many times over the years that you will be okay,” she said, “but I don’t know when you started to believe it.”

“I don’t know either,” he said quietly.

“You will be okay,” she told him. He smiled and pulled out of her grasp so that she could go home.

“I know,” he promised. He meant it.

“You’re an incredible young man, Andrew, and I cannot tell you how lucky I feel that I get to be a part of your life,” she said. Andrew rolled his eyes up to the sky, noting that the downpour throughout the afternoon seemed to have sent the clouds away, and Bee laughed. “Be safe tonight, and always.”

“I will,” he assured her, meeting her gaze again. “Message me when you’re home.”

“Of course,” she said, opening her car door. Andrew stepped out of her way and waved goodbye as she pulled away. He stood at the curb until her car disappeared out of sight and when he turned, Neil was standing in the doorway of the house. After their icing induced make-out session, they’d both showered and changed into comfortable clothes before going back downstairs to eat cake and sit with their family, and standing in the doorway backlit by the hallway light, Neil looked like home. Andrew crossed to him and let himself be guided back into the house where their cats were roaming free again.

“We don’t even have to clean up,” Neil said as they passed the kitchen. Their impromptu guests had orchestrated the clean up before they’d all departed, much to both Neil and Andrew’s glee. “What should we do for the rest of the night?” He asked, sinking onto the couch in the den. The look on his face told Andrew that Neil had a lot of ideas for what they could do with the rest of their night, and Andrew would be all too happy to oblige, but he had something else to do first.

“One second,” he said, tugging his hand out of Neil’s and leaving him there on the couch as he went upstairs for his phone and the Bluetooth speaker. When he returned, Neil was still seated and had a curious look on his face. Andrew shoved his awkwardness down and set up the devices as Neil tracked his movements around the room. Andrew didn’t have a particular song in mind, just pressed shuffle on Will’s playlist. He didn’t recognise the song that started, but it was slow and inherently sweet and loving because of the ‘wedding’ theme of the playlist, and he crossed back to where Neil was.

“What are you doing?” Neil asked, accepting Andrew’s hand and letting himself be pulled back to his feet.

“I am keeping my word,” Andrew answered, pulling him close. Neil’s face lit up with realisation and he laughed, putting his hands around Andrew’s waist as Andrew put his arms around his shoulders.

“We’re dancing on our wedding day,” Neil said. They weren’t dancing yet, neither of them knew how to, really, but it was the right idea. Andrew took the lead, mostly because he would be able to stop them falling if they tripped over each other’s feet, and they moved around the room slowly in a swaying circle. Andrew felt a little idiotic, and for someone as lithe and swift as Neil was, he was uncoordinated as they moved, but colour was high on Neil’s cheeks and every time he tripped he laughed and held on tighter to Andrew’s waist, knowing Andrew wouldn’t let him fall. One song bled into two, then three, and by song four, they had it worked out. They tripped less, they actually moved to the rhythm and not in useless circles of their own making, and both of them found it in themselves to relax their bodies. After the fifth song, Andrew moved his hands to Neil’s waist and pulled him off his feet before manoeuvring him into a fireman’s hold – legs draped over one arm and his back supported in the other. Neil cried out in surprise but settled against Andrew’s chest and put his arms around his shoulders after a moment.

“Sit still or I’ll drop you,” Andrew threatened. Neil snorted and intentionally wriggled as Andrew left the den.

“You wouldn’t dare,” he said. Andrew considered it but changed his mind as he reached the stairs. “What are you doing anyway?”

“Well I couldn’t carry you over the threshold,” Andrew said. Neil let his head fall back and Andrew had to twist before Neil smacked it into the bannister. “You’re an idiot.”

“Sure, but also we haven’t observed any traditions until now, so why this one?” Neil asked. Andrew smiled and nudged his cheek with his nose. He didn’t need to explain, Neil would know, and he did, judging by his laugh. “You’re just showing off,” he said.

“I am,” he agreed. “Now get the door,” he said. Neil reached down, holding onto the back of Andrew’s neck with one hand and pushed the door open so that Andrew could walk them into the bedroom and deposit Neil onto the mattress. Andrew kissed him quickly in a promise and went back downstairs to fetch his phone. He found a text from Bee saying she’d arrived in her hotel and would drive to Palmetto in the morning, and attached to the message were the pictures she’d taken of the cake cutting- starting with Neil kissing his cheek as they pushed the knife down, and ending with Andrew running after Neil. There was some of Neil putting the icing on his face and of Andrew throwing the knife in the air with an impassive look on his face, but each picture was worth keeping so Andrew saved them to his gallery.  
Back upstairs, he fell into bed and pulled Neil on top of him who seemed well and truly eager to participate in another wedding night tradition.

*

A while later, lying under rumpled sheets with Neil’s head on his chest and his fingers in Neil’s curls, Andrew let himself run through the events of the day. He could remember every moment vividly, like a movie running in his mind, from Neil’s sleepy voice when they woke up to the past three hours in the bed, and he was grateful – maybe for the first time in his life – for his photographic memory.  
“Handsome?” Neil asked, stretching out his legs and disturbing Sir who had been purring quietly at the end of the bed.

“Yes?”

“I know we chose the generic wedding vows, but I do have something I want to say,” Neil told him. Andrew looked at him as he propped himself up on his elbow, raising an eyebrow. Neither of them was clothed and the silver chain with the white gold ring glinted where it hung around Neil’s neck.

“Do I want to hear what you have to say?” Andrew asked, even though they both knew that the answer was yes. Neil just pressed a silencing kiss to his lips and got comfortable again.

“I don’t necessarily think what I have to say are vows per se, and the ‘til death do we part thing definitely stands, but…” he took a deep breath and Andrew felt apprehension settle into his stomach at the serious look on his husband’s face. “When we met, I had nothing and I was nothing, and all I knew was how to run and lie, and my survival was just that… I wasn’t living. You’ve given me everything, from a reason to stay to a home, and you taught me so much about life and love and… um, well, living. I’m never going to give that up or let it go, and you are the only person to ever exist who I will feel this way for and I promise to spend the rest of my life with you, believing in you, and loving you.” Neil closed his eyes and dropped a kiss to Andrew’s shoulder, and Andrew’s stomach twisted as the apprehension was replaced by all the feelings Neil’s words brought up. Andrew couldn’t unravel or pinpoint any one emotion, they just churned and roiled in his stomach as he pulled Neil back into his chest and kissed him hard. “I guess they kind of were vows, or at least… a vow?”

“Yes, Neil,” Andrew said quietly. Neil made a pleased noise and burrowed under the sheet again as if his words hadn’t just rocked Andrew’s world just a little bit. “This life wasn’t meant to be mine,” he said into the ensuing silence, his heart hammering in his throat.

“Hmm?” Neil hummed, whether in question or encouragement Andrew didn’t know, but it didn’t really matter. He put his elbow over his eyes and went back to talking.

“I don’t think I ever had hope for something like this, even when I was a kid. I always thought I was unlovable and was supposed to die alone, and die young while I was at it.” Andrew struggled to find the words, but Neil waited patiently and sleepily in his arms. “I think every day that I’ve known you, no matter how tragical and dramatic it may have been, I’ve learnt something new.”

“Even if that something was that the mafia is bad?” Neil asked, smiling into Andrew’s skin.

“Even if that something is that you’re not funny,” Andrew replied without missing a beat.

“Hey, asshole, we’re married now so you have to be nice to me,” Neil complained.

“So, you’re a dreamer too, got it,” Andrew deadpanned, but Neil bit the sensitive skin near his collarbone, and he smirked as he pushed his face away. “Anyway, my promise is that I’ll keep learning, and I’ll keep trying, every day for the rest of my life with you,” he said quietly when they’d settled back down. Neil hummed appreciatively and Andrew felt his long lashes flutter against his chest as Neil closed his eyes to sleep, the chain and ring between them, the other ring on Andrew’s finger in Neil’s hair.  
Just like that, their first night as husbands swamped them in sleep, and Andrew felt lighter and more grounded than he had felt… maybe ever.


	36. Part 1: "It's Going to be Okay."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long and big chapter has been separated into smaller chapters!  
> This is part 1.  
> TW in the notes below <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, big thank you to Little Lighthouse and Sails and Skies- you two have made this past nearly two weeks of writing worth it and I appreciate your support.  
> Also thank you to Nora, my beta, for your consistent and amazing help. I value you, and I appreciate you every day. 
> 
> This is a heavy chapter/couple of chapters, but I need you all to trust me. I will NOT kill anyone, and there is important character building and fluff in all of this and it will end happy. This fic is not designed to traumatise or hurt the readers. 
> 
> Trigger warnings for this chapter and the following parts of this chapter are as follows (beware that these are spoilers): Hospital. Panic/Panic attack. Hallucination. Near death experience/Flatlining. References to past abuse (Drake, etc). Emotional Turmoil in graphic description.

Neil knew Andrew didn’t regret anything, but as he watched his husband stare down at the Halloween costume Neil had chosen for him, he had a suspicion that Andrew may be regretting letting Neil choose.  
“You alright, handsome?” Neil asked, leaning his shoulder against the door of Andrew’s old room in Columbia. They’d been here only a month ago for their wedding, but after a call from Kevin begged them to return for Halloween with Thea, Renee, and Allison, they’d agreed to fly down for another weekend. They’d invited Olivia too, who was bringing Riley, and Dante, Jaiden and Oscar were flying down from Portland. Olivia and Riley were sleeping in Aaron’s old room, the trio in Nicky’s, Allison and Renee in a hotel, and Kevin and Thea were staying in the small apartment Aaron and Katelyn shared because they were both doing some sort of hospital practical thing for school and would barely be home.

“I hate you,” Andrew moaned. Neil grinned and entered the room, putting his hand on his shoulder, and when it didn’t get shrugged off, he put an arm around him and kissed his temple.

“You don’t think it’ll suit you?” Neil teased, earning himself a bored look.

“No, Neil, I don’t think an angel costume will suit me,” he grumbled.

“But you’ve got the blonde hair and the gold eyes and the jawline,” he said, pressing his smile into Andrew’s cheek.

“And what’s your costume?” He demanded. Neil smirked and rifled through the plastic bag until his fingers closed around the accessory. He pulled out the red, plastic horns attached to a black headband with a triumphant grin. Andrew took one look and rolled his eyes so dramatically all Neil could see for a moment was white.

“You good?” Neil asked with a laugh.

“This is the worst thing you have ever done,” Andrew decided, picking up his plastic halo. Neil didn’t think it was the worst thing he had ever done, he was feeling quite smug. “Get changed in the bathroom,” Andrew said. Neil didn’t read into the dismissal, just gathered his new red jeans and red t-shirt, the devil horns, and the clip-on tail to disappear into the bathroom. They’d flown in at three pm, earlier than their temporary housemates, and Andrew had immediately crawled into the bed to sleep off his anxiety and vertigo for a little while. Neil knew that this was the night that some of their friends would find out they were married because at practice neither of them wore their rings and they hadn’t made any announcements or calls. His stomach twisted uncomfortably when he thought of their possible reactions, but he pushed it aside while he got changed. The T-shirt he was wearing was long-sleeved and had a lower neckline than what he would normally wear so the chain around his neck was clearly visible, but he still pulled the ring out and let it rest on the outside of his clothes. He smiled and ran it along the chain for a moment, feeling the necklace vibrate around his neck. A knock on the door made him jump and he opened it to reveal Andrew standing there in his white jeans and white tank top, fluffy wings sticking out over his shoulder, the halo in place. He was scowling, but that didn’t stop Neil from kissing him softly.

“You look cute,” Neil told him.

“I better look fucking cute,” he muttered, sounding petulant. Neil reached around behind himself to grasp the tip of the tail clipped to the beltloop at the back of his jeans. Andrew’s lip twitched in a smile he couldn’t hide, and he took the tail from Neil and tugged. “Handy,” he mused.

“Don’t get used to it,” Neil warned him. Andrew huffed a laugh and let the tail go, tangling his fingers with Neil’s instead to lead him down the hall.

“Allison and Renee just got here, and our friends have migrated to the kitchen,” Andrew said, as if explaining why he’d fetched Neil from the bathroom. Downstairs, Renee in her ladybug costume was sitting on Allison’s lap, while Olivia fawned over Ally’s fairy wings. Olivia was dressed like a 1950’s socialite to match Riley’s 1950’s Greaser outfit. Jaiden was sitting on the counter in his Prince Eric costume from The Little Mermaid and standing between his knees was Date dressed as Flynn Rider from Tangled. Oscar was at the stove dressed as Prince Phillip from Sleeping Beauty even though his newly dyed blue hair didn’t quite fit, and Neil only knew who these characters were because they’d sent him a text with their ideas beforehand.

“Hey! It’s the terrible two… Neil fucking Josten what is that around your neck?” Allison’s warm greeting turned cold and demanding immediately before her gaze darted to Andrew’s hand and she gasped dramatically. “You two got fucking married without telling anyone?”

“They told me,” Kevin said from behind them, making both Neil and Andrew grip each other’s hand tighter in surprise as they tried not to let the fright show on their faces.

“You got fucking married!” Oscar shrieked. Olivia, Dante, Allison and Oscar immediately surged forward, and Andrew let go of Neil’s hand and fled the kitchen, darting between Kevin and Thea in his haste to not be inundated by touch. So, much for better or for worse. Renee silently followed him out, but that was the last thing Neil saw before Oscar and Allison were both trying to hug him, and Dante and Olivia were demanding to know when and how and why. Jaiden and Riley stayed politely back at the counter.

“Guys, okay, chill! We got married a month ago, no big deal, we were trying to avoid this…” Neil said, disentangling himself from arms. Renee led Andrew back into the room as Neil finally found breathing room again.

“We’re here for Halloween,” Renee said, gentle yet firm, the same tone of voice she’d always used to mediate the Foxes. “We can, with Andrew and Neil’s permission, celebrate their marriage at a later date, maybe next month?” She nudged Andrew gently. Andrew and Neil made eye contact, both grateful for Renee taking control, and both resigned to the fact that they would be in the middle of a party for them in a month.

“Okay, as long as you guys spread the news. We don’t want to deal with telling people,” Neil agreed, happy to hand the reins over.

“I’ll tell Nicky though,” Andrew interrupted. Their friends shared looks and eventually they all nodded their heads in agreement, willing to surrender the news until a later date.

“Thank you,” Neil said. “But yes, we are married,” he added, smiling sheepishly at Allison.

“I told you so. I told you two years ago.”

“You did,” he agreed. Andrew’s twenty-fourth birthday party felt like so long ago now, especially as he would be twenty-six in four days. “I didn’t believe you though.”

“You didn’t?” Andrew asked. Neil snorted and shook his head.

“Not a bit,” he admitted.

“Yeah, he told me it wasn’t going to happen too,” Oscar piped up as he looped his arm around Dante’s shoulders and pulled him in close. Dante’s smile was soft and sweet, but he nodded his agreement because Neil may have said the same thing once or twice when they lived together. Neil looked at Andrew and smiled with a shrug, running his ring along the chain.

“Fair enough,” Andrew said. “Wasn’t exactly something I expected either.”

“See, I’m not an asshole,” Neil said, facing his friends. Oscar and Allison held their hands up and made a so-so gesture.

“You’re kind of an asshole,” Dante agreed. Neil rolled his eyes at them and pushed through the crowd to the counter so that he could get a glass of water, mainly just for something to do.

“Is anyone going to ask what Kevin and Thea are dressed as, because like I have not a clue,” Oscar asked as everyone gathered back around the counter. Kevin looked offended and Thea laughed, good-naturedly kissing Kevin’s cheek.

“I’m Jack the Ripper, Thea is a victim,” Kevin explained, touching the plastic knife at his side. Thea touched the dried, fake blood around her throat and shrugged, and it was clear who had been the ones to choose their costumes.

“Didn’t Jack disembowel them?” Allison asked, fingers against her own throat. Kevin’s eyes lit up and he broke off on a historical tangent about the facts of Jack the Ripper, which was a lot of gore and disgust, but everyone seemed a little intrigued.

“I’m more surprised by Andrew’s angel costume,” Jaiden said when Kevin stopped rambling happily. Andrew glowered into the glass of water he’d taken from Neil, but Neil just grinned at his friend.

“I’m surprised he wore it,” Neil agreed. “His old inmate costume is in my bag in case he’d flat out refused.” Andrew put the glass down and turned around to change, but Neil caught his wrist and Andrew stopped with a glance over his shoulder. “Do you really not want to wear the costume?”

“It’s stupid,” he said.

“So is Jack the Ripper,” Neil said, earning an offended ‘Hey’ from Kevin. Andrew’s lip twitched in a smile, but he turned back around to stay with the group. “Thank you.”

“Whatever,” Andrew said, waving him away. Neil smiled and took the abandoned glass of water back up.

“So, we’re going to catch an Uber, right?” Jaiden said. “Or multiple?”

“I’m going to drive the rental,” Renee said.

“Not enough seats for everyone,” Allison pointed out. “We’ll take the throuple because then no couples get split up and all five seats are taken.”

“The rest of us can split two cabs,” Kevin agreed, pulling out his phone to organise. Riley took their phone out too, to call the second cab, while everyone else went around collecting all their things for the night. Allison went onto the front steps with Olivia so that Liv could pour glitter over her, and Renee and Thea started putting makeup and keys into their bags while they shared small talk.

“Your phone’s upstairs, I’ll get it,” Neil told Andrew.

“Wallet too,” Andrew answered, but he was distracted by something on Jaiden’s phone which the blonde was holding out for him to look at. Neil went back to the old room and shoved his phone, keys and wallet in his pockets before unplugging Andrew’s phone and searching his backpack for the wallet. When he returned, everyone was waiting on the front steps for the cabs. Neil locked up behind him, only pausing for a moment to consider getting jackets for him and Andrew but deciding against it because Eden’s was always so full of bodies and perspiration that they wouldn’t need it.  
Andrew held his hand out for Neil without looking away from Olivia and Riley where they were talking about a book Neil had noticed Andrew reading on the plane over. Neil interlocked their fingers but stood facing Oscar and Dante to referee their argument over who they’re expecting to make Championships in the coming season. Jaiden didn’t look thrilled by the topic of conversation as he looked between his boyfriends, but when he met Neil’s gaze he smiled warmly and shrugged.

“Exy is their life,” he said with a fond shake of his head. Immediately, both men shut up and they reached for Jaiden in sync, bringing him closer as if reassuring him that he was more important to them than the sport they had in common.

“Wow, can’t relate. Exy is my life,” Kevin said, but he was smirking and when Thea raised an eyebrow at him, he kissed her lightly on the cheek. 

“You’re as bad as him,” Andrew said, taking Neil by surprise. He hadn’t realised Andrew was paying attention.

“Hey! I married you, didn’t I?”

“Only because you can’t marry your racquet,” Andrew replied. Neil smiled and touched Andrew’s ring with his thumb just as the two individual cabs pulled onto the street. Renee did her usual thing of rounding up the people in her charge so that the fairy and the three Disney princes wound up in her rental car while Kevin, Thea and Riley hopped into one cab and Olivia joined Andrew and Neil in the second. Olivia pulled a flask of whiskey out of her small bag and handed it to Andrew who didn’t even blink as he unscrewed it and took a swig. Halloween celebrations had well and truly started.

*

The only three people entirely sober were Renee, Thea and Oscar, but Neil and Riley were next in line on the list of closest to being sober. Andrew had been steadily drinking from the start of the night, but last time when Neil had gone up to the table after extricating himself from a very drunk Allison, Andrew had been coherent and steady, so Neil wasn’t worried.  
“Hey, I think it’s time for me to take Ally back to the hotel, will everyone be okay to get rides home?” Renee asked the table. Allison was nearly draped over her in an extremely lopsided fashion and she’d lost her fairy wings sometime between the taxi ride at eight and well, twelve am.

“We’ll be okay,” Andrew answered. Neil reached out for an unopened bottle of water in the middle of the table, having drunk enough for the night to feel social without reaching his later stages of drunkenness.

“We’ll get lunch before we all head back to our home states,” Neil promised them.

“That sounds good,” Kevin agreed from where his face was buried in Thea’s hair.

“You’re a mess, Day,” Allison slurred.

“You too, Reynolds,” he shot back, but they just grinned at each other. Neil watched as Andrew let Renee press her hand to his cheek and then the two women were leaving through the throng of costumes.

“Thea Muldani, my queen, come dance with us!” Olivia said, dragging Oscar by one hand up from the table but looking at her. Dante and Jaiden were dancing on the dance floor still, but Riley was sitting at the table with Thea and both of them looked amused by the invite.

“Will you come?” Thea asked Riley. “I cannot be the only sober one on the dance floor.”

“Excuse me,” Oscar said with a laugh, holding his hand up a little.

“You dance like you’re drunk though,” Riley mused with a small smile. Thea hummed her agreement, but she got up off her stool and held her hand out to Riley. They latched on to Olivia and Oscar and they trailed single-file back to the dance floor, leaving Kevin, Neil and Andrew at the table like old times.

“This is a throwback,” Kevin said. Neil hopped up on a spare stool next to Andrew and nodded his head, his mouth full of water.

“It has been… a while,” Andrew allowed.

“Since the first time the three of us started sitting at bar tables together?” Neil asked.

“Just us,” Kevin said. Andrew nodded his head slowly, but there was a frown pulling at his eyebrows.

“You okay?” Neil asked. Andrew’s frown deepened and he swayed slightly. Neil’s concern doubled and he held the open water bottle to him. Andrew reached for it, but he missed it and started blinking rapidly as if his vision was blurring. “Drew, handsome, what’s going on?” Neil asked, sounding as alarmed as he felt. His heartbeat was steadily rising, and his mouth felt drier than the handful of drinks warranted.

“How many drinks have I had tonight?” Andrew asked, but his voice was slurred. Kevin frowned, leaning over the table to look at him closely.

“You have the spooky good memory,” Kevin reminded him, drunken glaze in his eyes clearing.

“I’ve had…” Andrew trailed off as his eyes unfocused.

“Drew!” Neil said firmly, snapping his fingers in front of him. Neil had seen Andrew drunk a handful of times in his life, but there was something off about how he was acting now.

“Five drinks in… in four hours,” Andrew said, closing his eyes and swaying forward. Neil had seen Andrew drink five drinks in one hour and walk around like he hadn’t had a single taste of alcohol. Something was very wrong.

“Hey, handsome, what’s happening?” Neil asked, trying to sound calm, but fear was crawling up his throat. Andrew didn’t respond, he just slid out of his seat with his chin lolled against his chest. Neil leapt for him and caught him around the waist before he could hit the ground, fear a palpable thing holding onto his chest. Kevin was out of his seat too and he came around the table to them, a frown on his face.

“Neil… I think…”

“Yeah, I think so too,” Neil muttered, not needing to hear it aloud. “Babe? Drew? Come on, Andrew,” Neil said, tapping Andrew’s cheeks with his palm. Andrew’s eyes fluttered open, but he wasn’t able to focus his gaze.

“Here, give him to me,” Kevin said. “Go see if Roland knows what’s happened, I’m going to see if I can get him to drink some water.”

“Uh, yeah, okay,” Neil agreed, letting Kevin take Andrew’s weight. Neil darted through the crowd, his heart hammering and he swallowed his rising panic as he slammed into the bar. Roland, the manager of the establishment after so many years, saw him and excused himself from his customers.

“What’s the matter?” He asked, voice low.

“Have you made all Andrew’s drinks tonight?” Neil asked, hating how hoarse his voice sounded. Roland looked taken aback, but he nodded his head.

“Yeah, of course. Why?”

“Did you dose him?” Neil demanded.

“Fucking what? Nah, man, of course I didn’t dose Andrew. I haven’t actually dosed anyone since you,” Roland answered, but fear was creeping into his own expression. Neil didn’t have time to be annoyed about what happened his first night out at Eden’s.

“Something’s wrong,” Neil said, sounding as helpless as he felt.

“Can he hold his own head up?” Roland ask, expression clearing as he went into crisis mode. Neil shook his head. “You need to call an ambulance, right now. If he can’t hold his head up, something could be wrong. We also don’t know what he’s been spiked with or how that could affect anything else he’s taken. You call the ambulance; I’m going to call the police and watch security tapes okay?”

“He hasn’t taken anything,” Neil argued.

“He’s on antidepressants, right?”

“Oh. Yeah. Okay,” Neil answered, feeling a little light-headed himself.

“Now, Neil, go!” Roland said firmly. Neil pushed away from the bar, fumbling for his phone in his pocket.

“Outside,” Neil told Kevin, who nodded and tried to take a step with Andrew, but the blonde had his eyes closed and mouth slightly open, groaning softly. “Carry him.”

“He’s going to kill me,” Kevin muttered, but he picked Andrew up like a fireman and followed Neil outside. The familiar bouncers called out, but Neil was already dialling 911 and they rounded the building to be out of the way. Neil went through the necessary steps to get an ambulance dispatcher and after she got the location, she started asking him questions that Neil didn’t want to think about.

“Has he been drinking?”

“Yes.”

“Is he on prescription medication?”

“Yes.”

“What is it?”

“I don’t know, antidepressants?”

“Has he taken recreational drugs tonight?”

“No.”

“Okay, Mr. Josten, is he breathing?”

“Y- yes!” Neil croaked. “Our friend is holding him like a fireman.”

“That’s okay, can your friend put him down in the recovery position for me, please?” The lady asked gently.

“Kev, lay him down in the recovery position,” Neil told him. His fingers and lips felt numb. Andrew was conscious, barely, but he couldn’t keep his eyes opened for long and his breathing was shallow and harsh. Kevin did as Neil instructed, but Andrew tried to sit up straight away. Neil dropped to his knees at his side and virtually threw his phone at Kevin who caught it and held it to his ear. “Hey, Drew, it’s okay, look at me,” Neil said quietly, putting his hands on Andrew’s chest.

“No!” Andrew croaked, trying to bat Neil’s hand away. Neil withdrew, but stayed at his side, even though Andrew’s eyes were closed. “Don’t touch me,” Andrew moaned, but he fell backwards and Neil had to catch him by the shoulders so he didn’t hit his head on the sidewalk. In response, Andrew started trying to roll away from him and Neil realised there were tears starring in his eyelashes. Neil’s throat felt as if it was closing up and he let go of Andrew, grabbing the chain around his neck instead.

“Andrew, listen, it’s me,” Neil choked.

“Please. Please. Please.” The repeated word was a whisper. A pained, haunting whisper, and Neil watched his husband curl in on himself.

“He’s hallucinating,” Neil said weakly, looking up at Kevin who repeated that to the lady on the phone. Neil sat on his ass and hugged his knees to his chest, watching as Andrew tried to make himself small and whimpering, begging, to be let go of. Every broken ‘please’ made Neil want to claw his own skin off and he was fighting both his gag reflex as fear choked him, and the tears welling in his throat.

“She says to stay calm, the ambulance are nearly here,” Kevin said, dropping to a crouch on Andrew’s other side. “The hallucination won’t last much longer, apparently.”

“Okay,” Neil said, voice barely audible. He could hear the sirens nearing anyway and he reached out for his phone. “Go inside, tell everyone else we’re leaving, but don’t tell them anything else yet.”

“Do you want me to come to the hospital?” Kevin asked, handing the phone back. Neil tried for a weak smile and shook his head.

“As great as you have been, you’re thoroughly sloshed. Go home, rest, sober up. I will text you if I know anything,” Neil promised him. Kevin swallowed and sent a pained look at Andrew who had fallen silent apart from his ragged breathing.

“Please, for the love of God, text me,” he muttered. “We’ll be there for both of you.”

“I know,” Neil promised. Kevin rose to his feet and reached over Andrew to pull Neil up too. Kevin put his hand gently on Neil’s face and looked him hard in the eyes.

“It’s going to be okay,” he said. “I know you’re scared. Please don’t try to deal with this on your own.”

“Okay, Kevin, I hear you,” Neil agreed, chest acing. Kevin let go as the Ambulance pulled into the parking lot. Neil hung up on the lady on the phone and after Kevin waved down the ambulance, his friend nodded at Neil and disappeared back the way they’d come. Neil watched as Andrew was lifted onto the stretcher, weakly trying to break away from the paramedics.

“Who are you?” The man demanded.

“His boyfriend,” Neil replied on instinct.

“You coming? We have to go now,” he said from where he stood, ready to shut Andrew in. Neil nodded and clambered up after Andrew and sat down where the woman pointed. The doors slammed shut behind Neil and he nearly choked on his tongue. He’d seen Andrew in an ambulance once before, but he hadn’t ridden with him then. He looked so pale and washed out with his colourless hair and the white clothing on chalky skin where he lay on the white stretched.

“His hallucination has stopped,” the female told Neil. She had a mask over his face and was rhythmically squeezing the balloon bit at the end to give him oxygen. “Been together long?” She asked.

“Six years, nearly,” he answered.

“Good, good,” she said. “Can you tell me your name?”

“Neil Josten.”

“Nice to meet you,” she said. “You look like you might be heading into shock, my friend,” she said gently. Neil tore his gaze away from Andrew and shrugged at her helplessly. She grabbed a blanket from a compartment behind her and handed it over, asking him to put it over his shoulders. He did as she asked, feeling as if on autopilot, and turned his attention back on Andrew. His husband opened his eyes weakly for a moment, the most focused they’d been in a while, as his chest started to rise and fall in a panic.

“Drew,” Neil said, and Andrew’s eyes snapped to him, wide and scared. “Just breathe. Keep breathing or I swear I’ll kill you,” he added weakly. Andrew managed a small nod and he moved his hand at his side. Neil reached forward and took it between both of his, pressing a kiss to his knuckles. “I’m here. I won’t go anywhere,” he promised, just before Andrew’s eyes rolled to the back of his head and the paramedic swore eloquently.

*

Neil wasn’t really sure about what happened exactly after that. He heard the word ‘seizure’ and then a minute or two after that he heard ‘at risk of respiratory failure’, and then they were at the hospital, in the disgusting smelling hallways, and then someone was prying his hand from Andrew and yelling at him to stay put and that someone would be out later to fill him in.  
“I’m his husband!” Neil yelled more than once, but that didn’t seem to matter.

“He said boyfriend back at the club,” the male paramedic told a nurse, and that seemed to be the end of it. Neil had to stay put in a hallway with a paisley patterned couch and a really crappy painting of flowers. He hadn’t meant to say ‘boyfriend’, they hadn’t been married long enough for that to be second nature in the middle of a crisis. He paced for an hour, fear and anger and guilt toiling in his stomach until he ran to the bathroom and violently threw up in the cubicle. He wiped his eyes, blew his nose and rinsed his mouth before exiting, feeling more determined and a lot desperate. He stalked to the desk at the front of the intensive care unit and slammed his hands against the desk between him and the nurse.

“I have been here for an hour,” he said firmly. “I want to see my husband, or at the very least I need an update.”

“Name?” She asked, voice tired.

“Mine or his?”

“His, please,” she said.

“Andrew Minyard,” he answered. She tapped at a keyboard for a moment before nodding her head.

“You’re Neil Josten? His boyfriend?”

“Husband,” Neil corrected, annoyed at himself all over again for his slip up.

“It says here that you told the paramedics you’re his boyfriend,” she told him, disbelief clear on her face. Neil ground his teeth for a minute, reminding himself that punching the nurse was not going to achieve anything.

“We haven’t been married long,” he said quietly. “Please, let me see him.”

“Only family or spouses allowed in the ICU,” she said firmly. Neil fought control of his breathing.

“I called his brother, he didn’t answer,” Neil admitted. He’d tried three times to get a hold of Aaron over the past hour, knowing if the role was reversed, he would want Aaron to call him even if he knew that Aaron probably wouldn’t. “His cousin is in Germany. There’s only me, and I am his spouse.”

“I can’t let you in, but it says here that he has lost consciousness after respiratory failure, but they have managed to stabilise him,” she said gently. Neil’s knees went weak and he gripped the counter so hard his knuckles were white. “He’s a professional athlete?” She asked, reading from the screen and Neil vaguely remembered filling out a form for him.

“Yes.”

“The respiratory failure wasn’t for very long, they don’t think there will be any long-lasting damage to his respiratory system, and he will be able to work again,” she said kindly.

“He’s going to be okay?” He choked.

“He’s not out of the woods yet, sweetheart, not even close, but if he does pull through with no more trauma to his lungs then he should be able to play,” she answered. Neil, maybe for once in his life, didn’t care about Exy. He didn’t care if Andrew never played again. He just needed Andrew to wake up and come home with him.

“I need to see him,” he said, standing up straighter. Neil realised the familiar, sharp, pain behind his ribs was grief. He felt like he was going to throw up again. Andrew was his family. He was the only person in the world that understood Neil, who loved him, and Neil had never loved anyone else the way he loved Andrew. He needed to see him so badly that his stomach ached, his chest was tight, his fingers and lips were numb again and he realised his hands were shaking. _He’s not out of the woods yet… He’s not out of the woods yet… He’s not out of the woods yet…_ Neil didn’t know if Andrew was going to be okay and that made bile rise in the back of his throat.

“You can’t,” the lady said, firm again.

“I am his husband,” Neil repeated, his voice broken. “I am. I promise.”

“You’d be surprised by how many same sex couples we get trying to tell us the same thing when it isn’t true,” she said, gentle again. Neil pulled his ring out from under his stupid red tee shirt.

“We got married a month ago,” he said. “I can’t wear it on my finger because my hands are fucked, but it’s the truth.”

“Do you have proof? Maybe your marriage certificate?” She asked. Neil felt defeat settle on his shoulders and he shook his head.

“We live in Chicago, we were just here for Halloween,” he said quietly. “I don’t know how to prove to you.”

“Could one of your witnesses vouch for you? Maybe a friend could bring the certificate down for you?” She suggested. Neil gaped at her, anger rising again.

“My husband could be fucking dying back there, and you want me to ring our friend and have them break into our house to fly down and bring our wedding certificate?” He demanded. Something in his tone or on his face made her lean back in her chair. “Our brothers fucking witnessed the ceremony, one of whom is drunk off his ass and trying to sober up and the other isn’t answering his fucking pho…” Neil’s loud tirade cut off in surprise. “Aaron?” He called. The blonde was wearing scrubs and hurrying down the hall with his head down, but he stopped when his name was called and he whirled around, eyes narrowing at him.

“What are you doing here, Josten? What are you wearing?”

“Halloween,” Neil asked, touching the horns still on his head. “You dressed as a doctor for Halloween?”

“No, I’m doing my practical rotation in the psych ward. You’re at the teaching hospital, Neil. What’s going on?” Aaron asked, coming closer with a concerned look on his face. “Have you been crying?”

“Throwing up,” Neil answered honestly. “This was the closest hospital to Eden’s.”

“I am going to ask you again, and you best believe I am only being polite because I am working, but you need to tell me what you are doing here and where the hell my brother is, right now,” Aaron said firmly. The question slapped Neil in the face, and he swallowed loudly.

“Right, yeah. Andrew got dosed, we think, at Eden’s. In the ambulance on our way here, he had a seizure, and now apparently he’s unconscious after respiratory failure or something?”

“What?” Aaron asked, paling.

“Yeah, but this bit- this nurse- won’t let me out to see him,” Neil said, swallowing his insult purely because he knew causing fights was not going to get him out to Andrew faster. Aaron frowned at that and looked at the nurse.

“Why not?”

“Family and spouses only, you know the rules,” she said.

“They’re married. I was there,” Aaron said darkly.

"He was a witness," Neil pressed when he saw the nurse waver.

"You're Andrew Minyard's brother?" She asked. Aaron rolled his eyes.

"Identical twin brother, not hard to check if I'm being honest, just go look at his face," he snarked, his professional mask slipping a little bit. He pulled the clipped tag off the pocket of his scrub and handed it over to her so she could read his name and she nodded her head when she handed it back. "Now take my brother-in-law to his husband," he said firmly.

"Okay, I will," she said, still not looking like she believed them, but apparently willing to do it anyway.

"Thanks," Neil told Aaron who waved it away as he clipped his ID back on. "Aaron?"

"Yes?"

"I tried to call you," Neil said. Aaron looked surprised by this, but he nodded his head slowly.

"Thanks. I would have called you too," he said. Neil managed a wobbly smile and the nurse rose from her station and waited for Neil to catch up. Neil got to her side before turning around to Aaron again. He was standing where they'd left him, looking a little lost as he toyed with a pocket watch that Neil knew Andrew had bought him for Christmas last year.

"Hey, Aaron?"

"Yeah?"

"Who would have thought I'd be bringing him to the ICU and not to you in psych," Neil teased weakly. Aaron shook his head, but the smile was real no matter how small.

"You're a horrible person, Neil," he said.

"I'm not wrong though," Neil shot back. Aaron's smile grew a little bit.

"No, you're not. I guess this is improvement of its own," he allowed. "Now go, I'll come find you both after I finish my shift."

"Okay," Neil agreed, turning to follow the nurse down the hallway and through the doors to the ICU patient rooms.

Neil's stomach dropped to his shoes and his heart filled his throat when he was led into Andrew's room. He had a tube in his mouth that Neil assumed was what was giving him air, and an IV drip in arm. He had other things stuck to him, attaching him to various machines next to him to monitor him, and Neil was at least a little relieved to see and hear the steady beep of the heartrate machine. Alive. He was alive. Neil hadn't realised how terrified he was of Andrew dying until that steady beep filled his ears. The nurse told him firmly not to touch anything before closing the door behind her. Neil crept slowly into the room and dragged a chair to Andrew's side, collapsing into it before his legs could give out. Andrew looked so much smaller than he actually was, lying in the bed, and he was so still apart from the forced rise and fall of his chest. He was pale and chalky, and his usually bitten-red lips were nearly colourless. Neil swallowed the lump in his throat that still felt like his heart and reached out to take his hand where it lay on the bed at his side. He needed to feel warmth, life, to remind himself he wasn't sitting next to a corpse. Andrew's hand didn't move, didn't respond to touch like it would normally, but it was warm and dry, and Neil could feel his pulse in his wrist in time to the beeping of the machine. Neil kept hold with one hand and used his other arm as a pillow on the mattress, leaning forward to rest his forehead on it and close his eyes. Exhaustion swamped him the minute his eyes closed, and he felt himself falling down a well of darkness.

*

Neil slept fitfully, disturbed every half an hour by a nurse coming in to check on Andrew's vitals and temperature and whatever else it was. The rotation of nurses didn't ask who Neil was, they didn't tell him to leave, they didn't fight him. They just politely roused him and asked him to sit back while they did their thing, then Neil was allowed to take Andrew's hand again and put his head on the bed. At a little after six in the morning, six hours after Andrew started showing signs of being dosed, Neil was awakened again, but this time it was by Aaron. The other Minyard was pulling his own chair up to the other side of the bed and he looked mildly apologetic when Neil lifted his head. Aaron was dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie, his hear was damp and he looked exhausted in the watery light filtering through the hospital curtains over the window as the sun started rising. Neil looked down at where Andrew lay and his chest constricted again, near enough choking his airways. Andrew was such a light sleeper and he hadn't moved at all over the past couple of hours. Neil needed to see his eyes open, needed to know that inside, Andrew was still there. Neil tried to take a deep breath to steady himself, but it didn't quite fill his lungs. He tried for another, but that didn't work either. Almost as if distantly, he could hear his own haggard attempts to breathe, and the familiar weight on his chest as the room pressed down on him made him realise absently that he was having a panic attack. Just as the realisation sunk in, Neil felt himself getting heaved out of the seat and yanked out of the room. His panic doubled and he tried to fight free, but he was choking on his own fear.

"I've wanted to do this for years," he heard Aaron say, a split second before a sharp pain exploded in the side of his face with a crack. Neil gasped and his lungs filled with air and he would have dropped to the ground if Aaron wasn't still holding him up against the wall. Neil's vision refocused as he sucked in air, and he managed to glare at him.

"Did you just slap me?" He demanded.

"Yes," Aaron answered, still looking exhausted but there was a small smile on his face.

"You've been a doctor in the psych ward for God knows how long, do you just go around slapping everyone?" Neil muttered. Aaron let him go, judging Neil could hold his own, and stepped out of his space.

"No, I'm not allowed to slap my patients, but you're my brother-in-law and I've known you for six years so I can slap you," Aaron answered. "Besides, it worked."

"It did," Neil conceded, but he wasn't about to say thank you.

"You need to go home," Aaron said. Neil narrowed his eyes at him.

"Excuse me?” Neil snapped. “I think the fuck not." Aaron held his hands up, whether to placate or surrender, Neil wasn't sure.

"You've been here for at least four hours that I know of, you stink like Eden's and you're so tired you can't keep a lid on your panic response. I'm not saying go home and stay home. I'm saying go home and shower, sleep for an hour, call or text whoever needs to know, eat something, and pack a bag. When you come back, you could be here for more than a day, okay? Go home and get it together." Aaron's voice was quiet, gentle even, but something about his tone told Neil that Aaron wasn't going to lose this fight. This was what he had been training for, what he was meant to do. Take control of crisis situations, make the right calls, make sure everyone involved in a medical problem were looked after. Still, Neil stuck his chin out.

"I'm not leaving him," he said. Aaron barely concealed his sigh of frustration.

"Neil, for once in your life, I need you to trust me. I know what I'm talking about, and right now you're not helping yourself or him. You can take my car and go to the Columbia house. Make those calls, look after yourself, and sleep. Don't come back here before eight A.M or I'll have security remove you," he said, and Neil decided not to call his bluff.

"Who do I call?" He asked instead, hating how weak he sounded. Aaron visibly relaxed, holding the higher ground for once and Neil managed to resent him for it.

"Does Kevin know what's up?"

"Yeah," Neil admitted.

"Okay. Give me your phone," he said, hand out. Neil gave it to him unlocked and watched Aaron tap something out. When he received it back, it was open at a notes page.

  1. _Drive home_
  2. _Text Kevin update: 'He's in a stable condition, just not conscious, but the doctors are optimistic. Aaron is with him while I rest, but I'll be going back in a bit. If we need anything, I'll text.'_
  3. _Eat_
  4. _Shower_
  5. _Sleep for 1 hour at least_
  6. _Call whoever has the cats and tell them you aren't sure when you're coming back_
  7. _Call Betsy Dobson and tell her what's happened. Tell her she won't be able to see him, but she can come up if she wants to._
  8. _Call Nicky because he needs to know_
  9. _Call the Lions- whoever needs to know Andrew is sick_
  10. _Tell Renee and Heather if you want to_
  11. _Pack a bag for you and Andrew- bring a book and a phone charger_
  12. _Come back_



Neil looked up at Aaron with raised eyebrows, but Aaron looked back with a cool expression.

"You're all over it," Neil observed.

"This is what I do," Aaron said. "You can go home and fall apart now, and trust that I'm in control. Okay?"

"I think I already have fallen apart," Neil said quietly. Aaron nodded his head, almost as if he understood.

"I get it. If it was Katelyn, I don't know if I could handle it," he admitted.

"Make you a deal?" Neil said. Aaron raised an eyebrow and nodded slowly, warily, probably remembering the last deal he made. "You keep your shit together and stay organised while Andrew is in there, and if it's ever Katelyn, I'll come down and do the same for you."

"You think you could be logical and clinical?" Aaron scoffed.

"Yeah, I usually am," Neil answered with a wry laugh. "It's just... it's Andrew and I can't..." he choked on his words and lolled his head back against the hospital wall. "I can't lose him, Aaron. He's all I've got."

"He isn't all you've got, but you won't lose him," Aaron said. "And you know what, I'll take your deal."

"Okay," Neil agreed. Aaron held his hand out and Neil shook on it.

"Come on, Josten, I'll show you where my car is," Aaron said when they let go. Neil glanced at the door to Andrew's room and Aaron neatly stepped aside and gestured that it was okay for him to go in. Neil felt stupid wanting to say goodbye to someone unconscious, but he went in anyway and pressed a kiss to Andrew's cheek.

"I'll be back later," he promised. Aaron was waiting for him and after Neil checked it was okay to leave Andrew alone for a little bit, they set off down the hall. Aaron handed over his keys and parking pass when they reached the shitty, small, student-affordable vehicle.

"Thanks," Neil said. Aaron nodded and went back inside without even checking if Neil got in the car.

*

Neil did the first five things on the list Aaron had given him and when he woke up to his alarm, it was a little after eight in the morning. Neil grabbed his phone off charge and went downstairs for a drink of water and found Olivia and Oscar sitting next to each other at the counter. Olivia looked extremely hungover, but Oscar just looked a little tired and he sat up straight when Neil walked in.

"Hey man, you bailed so early!" He said. Neil filled a glass up with water to prepare himself and stall, but he didn't want to lie to his friends.

"Andrew's drink was spiked, we had to get an ambulance for him. He's still in the hospital," he said. Olivia froze and Oscar's eyes widened so far he looked comical.

"Serious?" He checked. Neil nodded his head.

"His brother's with him now, so I could sort some shit and sleep. I'll be heading back soon," he said. Olivia put her head in her hands and Oscar patted her back gently. It was strange to think that they were on opposing teams, that if it wasn't for Neil and Andrew they wouldn't be friends.

"Will you keep us posted?" Oscar asked.

"I might make a group chat, I need to keep a few people in the loop," Neil said.

"Yes, please," Olivia said quietly. "Is he okay?"

"Stable, apparently, but still in ICU and still unconscious," Neil said. She made a funny noise and slid from her stool.

"I need Riley," she muttered, walking away. Neil watched her go before putting his glass down on the counter and toying with his phone.

"What do you need to do before you can go back?" Oscar asked. Neil looked up at him and waved the phone at him. "Okay, come sit," his friend said, tapping the chair Olivia had vacated. Neil climbed up and put his phone down on the table between them. "Who first?"

"Jackson. He's got the cats and I don't know when we'll be back in Chicago," he said. Oscar picked up the phone and Neil's finger, unlocking the phone before letting Neil put his hand down. Neil watched his friend dial out and when the call was ringing, Neil let Oscar put the phone back in his hand. Neil felt numb from his toes to his face. He didn't quite feel real anymore as he put the phone to his ear.

"Hey, Neil! What's up?" Jackson answered.

"Hi, Jacks, I know it's only seven thirty over there... sorry if I woke you," he said quietly. Jackson laughed amicably.

"Nah, man, your demon children woke me up half an hour ago for food. You're a monster, giving them an early morning routine and then palming them off on me," he teased. Neil winced a bit.

"Yeah, about that... um, we're not sure when we'll be back. Can you look after that cats for a couple more days?" He asked. Jackson's silence was calculating and when he spoke, he sounded concerned.

"Of course, I'll look after them as long as you need me to, but what's happened?"

"Andrew's in hospital," Neil began, continuing to talk over Jackson's gasp. "His drink was spiked, and it got bad, man. He's unconscious in the intensive care unit now and his brother is with him. I'm about to head back," he said.

"Fucking fuck stick," Jackson said quietly.

"Yeah."

"Do you need me to do anything, other than look after your babies?" Jackson asked. Neil felt a little taken aback by the offer; he'd thought asking Jackson to look after the cats was going to be asking too much and now, he was offering to do more. Was there anything Neil needed from home?

“No, I don’t think so, please just look after King and Sir,” he said quietly. “Oh, wait, I have a really shitty request,” he said quickly, too numb and empty to feel guilty.

“Yeah?”

“Can you tell Heather? She’ll still be asleep and I just…”

“Yeah, oh God yeah, I can do that,” Jackson said quickly. “I’ll give her a call in a couple hours and have a chat with her.”

“Thank you,” Neil said automatically. “I’m creating an ‘update on Andrew’ group chat, I’ll add you and once you tell Heather, you can add her.”

“Okay mate, you okay?” Jackson asked quietly.

“Mate? Your Australian is showing,” Neil deflected.

“Neil, come on man. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” he answered, wincing at himself. “I’m not, actually. I am really not, but there’s nothing you can do about it,” he corrected himself. Jackson hummed softly.

“Thank you for being honest,” Jackson said. “I’ll speak to you later?”

“Bye, Jacks,” Neil said, hanging up after Jackson said goodbye. He sighed and put the phone on the counter, spinning it around with his finger. Oscar took the phone away from him and caught his finger to unlock it, but he didn’t prod or press for Neil to make the next call. Neil put his head in his hands and tugged at his hair, knowing full well he was about to call Dr. Dobson and he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say. After a long moment, Neil reached for the phone again and clicked on Betsy’s contact. She answered nearly immediately.

“Neil, good morning,” she said, chirpy as always.

“Hey,” Neil said, feeling coming back to him slowly as the reality of this phone call dawned on him.

“Oh, that was not a happy greeting. What’s happening?” She said. Neil let out quiet sigh and pulled on his hair again, eyes closed tight.

“Andrew’s in hospital, Bee,” he said quietly. Betsy made a small, pained noise, but she didn’t ask any questions and instead waited for Neil to speak. “His drink was spiked last night and he had a seizure in the ambulance and I heard ‘respiratory failure’ a few times and now he’s unconscious in the ICU and he has a tube down his throat and I’m really scared.” The words were a rush. He didn’t take a breath and when he was done, he took a shuddering gulp for air. He wasn’t sure he’d ever said anything so honest to the woman before, or maybe even that many words in one go, but the circumstances seemed to call for it. 

“Oh my god,” she said after taking her own deep breath.

“Aaron- he’s with him now- said that you won’t be able to see him until he’s out of the ICU,” Neil reiterated.

“No, I know that,” she said. “I’m going to come up though, because I would like to be close. Will that be okay with you?”

“What? Why are you asking me?” Neil moaned, not wanting to think.

“Because, right now, what you want and what you need is important and you need support,” she said softly. Neil didn’t really know what to say to that, he just let the words fill his mind and ease some of the weight in his chest. “Neil?”

“You can come up,” he said. “We have friends in the Columbia house, I don’t…” Neil didn’t have enough brain power to problem solve anymore, but when he trailed off, Betsy made soft, hushing noises.

“Neil, it’s okay. You don’t need to worry about that now. I’m going to pick up Abby, and we’re going to come up. We’ll deal with the house and we’ll be there to look after you, and Aaron, and be closer to help with anything, okay?”

“Abby? Why Abby?” Neil asked. He sounded a little choked up because of the thick wad of emotions in his throat at the rest of her sentence, but he did need to know why his pseudo-mother was coming up with Andrew’s pseudo-mother. “I know why you want to come, but why Abby?”

“Oh, Neil,” she said sadly. “For you. She’ll want to come up for you. She’ll want to make dinners and clean the house and nag you about sleeping, and when it all gets too much, she’s going to want to give you a hug,” Betsy answered. Neil’s hands were shaking, and he stared down at the one not holding his phone to his ear, until Oscar held his own hand out. Neil nodded at him, and when Oscar took his hand and squeezed it tight, Neil felt a little more tethered for a moment. It had been years since Neil had looked at his support network outside of Andrew, and it had been a long time since he’d needed it, but looking at it now, he was grateful for it.

“Okay, yeah,” he said, swallowing against exhausted tears. “Bee?”

“Yes?”

“It’s my fault. I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“No, Neil!” Oscar said in a pained whisper, squeezing his hand again. Neil closed his eyes as tears wet his eyelashes.

“No, Neil, it’s not your fault,” Betsy said gently. “I wasn’t there, but I do know that this wasn’t your fault.”

“I wasn’t with him, Bee. I was on the dance floor. I wasn’t there to protect him and now he’s…” he coughed on a sob. Guilt had been steadily eating a hole in his chest since he’d sank to the sidewalk when Andrew had started hallucinating.

“Neil, listen to me, this is not your fault. I know you are doing everything you can for him now, and you are a good husband. You didn’t do this to him, I promise,” she said, her gentle tone barbed with seriousness. Neil sighed and let some of the tension ease out of his shoulders. He could fight her, or he could believe her, and he was too tired to try and fight.

“Betsy, I just… I have to go,” he mumbled.

“Okay, I’ll text you when we reach Columbia,” she said easily, softly. “Will you keep us in the loop?”

“I’ll add you to the group chat,” Neil muttered. Betsy managed a small laugh and they said goodbye before Neil could be any more honest with her. Oscar squeezed his hand again and let go, leaning on his palm as he waited for Neil to make the next move. He wasn’t sure he could trust his voice to talk for a few more minutes so he sent Renee a text message.

_Andrew in hospital after drink was dosed at Eden’s. He’s stable, but unconscious, and drs are optimistic. You don’t have to extend your stay in Columbia for him (or me), but I can add you to the group chat of updates?_

The blinking dots appeared nearly instantly, followed by: _Shit. Please do add me and Ally to GC. I will tell Dan and Matt and add them too, we’re family and we want to be there for you, but I know telling people will be hard. Ally and I will stay in Columbia for another week, just text if you need anything. We love you, Neil <3 _

Neil turned his phone off for a moment and closed his eyes again. Everyone he’d spoken to had been supportive and offered help- apart from Olivia who looked close to throwing up-, and they’d seemed to genuinely want what was best for Neil and Andrew. He swallowed against his dry mouth, sipped his water, licked his lips and dialled Nicky’s number. He needed to talk to Nicky and the Lions, and then he could pack the bag and go back to the hospital. At this rate, he wouldn’t get back until nine-thirty and being away for three hours was starting to make him feel guilty.  
“Hey! What’s up Neil?” Nicky answered. Unlike Betsy, Nicky sounded wary.

“Andrew’s drink was spiked, he’s in hospital, unconscious but stable, and in the ICU,” Neil said in a rush, not wanting to keep telling the story anymore.

“Come again?” Nicky asked after a pause.

“I can’t keep going through it, Nicky. I said what I said,” Neil muttered, sniffling a little.

“Okay, okay yeah.” Neil heard him take a long, deep breath. “Um, is he okay? Are you alright?”

“I’m… not okay, no. Andrew’s stable though, apparently. Aaron’s with him,” Neil answered.

“Okay, well… I know being in a same sex relationship means you can’t see him, but have you been able to touch base with Aaron?”

“What?” Neil asked, a little behind in his usual processing speed and Nicky always talked so fast. “Oh, yeah, no. I saw Aaron this morning, but this is probably not the best time to tell you that Andrew and I secretly got married in September.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah. Andrew was going to tell you this week, but um….”

“Shit. Well, congratulations and you both suck absolute ass,” he said, sounding only mildly offended. “What do you need from me?” He added in a much softer voice. Neil managed a small smile at the familiarity of Nicky’s banter.

“Like, gifts?”

“No, kid, my god. I mean with Andrew in hospital right now. What do you need from me?” Nicky answered, sounding exasperated and also nervous.

“Oh,” Neil said, feeling a little stupid. “I don’t know?”

“Have you spoken to your coach?”

“No.”

“Your PR person?”

“Also no.”

“Send me their numbers. I’ll give them a call, we’ll organise some press stuff, and I’ll tell your coach to eat his racquet if he gets mad at you for not being at practice. Then, I’ll be on the next flight out,” Nicky said. Neil sat up straight.

“Nicky, you don’t have to do that. I can call, and you don’t have to come all the way out here,” he said.

“Neil, the calls are easy, it’s pretty much my job anyway,” Nicky said. “And, no offence, but Andrew’s my cousin. Him, Aaron, you and Erik are the only family I have. I will be on that flight and I will come to Columbia, and I will help any way that I can. Erik can join me in a week.”

“Okay,” Neil relented. He had no leg to stand on in this fight and part of him was still reeling at being called family. “See you later?”

“Send me those numbers! I love you, kid!”

“Bye,” Neil squeaked. He sent Nicky Fiona and Coach Miles’ contacts to Nicky and made the stupid group chat, copy and pasting Aaron’s text for Kevin into the message box and pressing send. He slammed his phone down on the table, not caring if it broke, and let out a long breath.

“Now what?” Oscar asked.

“I pack a bag, and I go back,” Neil answered. Oscar slid from the stool and waited for Neil before leading the way back to the room. Oscar didn’t help Neil pack a bag so much as he sat on the edge of the bed quietly and watched. Whenever Neil paused, stared at nothing, lost his train of thought or felt himself start crumbling with fear, exhaustion and stress, Oscar was there to carefully bring him back to the task at hand. The last thing Neil grabbed was the book Andrew had been reading last, a blanket for when he or Aaron needed to sleep, and the phone charger.


	37. Part 2: "It's Going to be Okay."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final instalment of the scary chapter, happy ending's ensue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This gets worse before it gets better, but I swear it's nice and cute at the end <3   
> Look after yourselves. TW in the previous chapter apply.

As Neil drove back to the hospital with his old, worn out duffel on the passenger seat, he let himself feel a small amount of hope. Their friends and family had stood up and were rallying to help him, some of the weight and responsibility had been lifted from his shoulders, and once again the people in his life were reminding him that he didn't have to deal with gut wrenchingly horrible things alone. He was able to take some deep breaths, letting his tortured lungs rest for a little while, and he formed his own list of things that he could and should do as he walked through the hospital with his duffel and the blanket over his arm.   
He pushed open the door to Andrew’s room, the beeping of his heartrate monitor comforting in the midst of the whirring machines. Andrew was in the exact same position as when Neil had left, the tubes and wires still attached to him. Aaron was curled up on the floor under the window, using his arms as a pillow, and he didn’t stir as Neil pulled his seat back to Andrew’s bedside. He stashed the bag under his chair and, wondering who on earth he’d become, he took the blanket and draped it over Aaron awkwardly. The blonde stirred then, but only to mumble something incoherent and roll over, bunched a corner of the blanket under his head and held his middle finger up at Neil. Neil surprised himself by huffing a laugh and shook his head as he walked back to his chair, sitting down to take his hand. He pulled his legs up onto the seat and rested his chin on his knees, holding Andrew’s hands in both of his and watched the rise and fall of his chest. He was breathing steadily, and even though Neil knew it was being forced by the oxygen tube down his throat, at least he was breathing and alive. Neil took in a deep breath, held it, and let it out slowly. He felt better now that he was back in the hospital at Andrew’s side. It was dim in the room, the only light the glowing monitor screens and the sunlight that was managing to filter in through the curtains.   
“It’s going to be okay, Drew. I know you hate waking up in the mornings, but I really need you to. Yeah? Come back to me,” he murmured to Andrew. He wrapped one of his arms around his leg and half-closed his eyes, wondering if he could maybe get some more sleep now that he was back where he needed to be. The green line on the monitor was reassuring as it went up and down, beeping steadily, and Neil’s eyes traced the line. _Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._ Neil jolted when the beep became a whine and the up and down stopped, streaking the screen in one long, green line. He barely had time to register the change before Aaron was jumping to his feet with wide eyes and looked at Neil.

“What?” Neil managed to splutter, his brain refusing to process what the long, continuous beep meant, then the room was flooding with medical professionals and Aaron was at Neil’s side.

“Let go,” Aaron barked at Neil, looping his hands around Neil’s bicep, and yanking on him.

“Get them out of here!” One of the doctors yelled.

“I’m not going!” Neil yelled back, tightening his grip on Andrew. 

“Neil, now!” Aaron growled, pulling Neil over the arm of the chair where he landed in a stumble, letting go of Andrew.

“No! No, Aaron!” Neil cried out as he was dragged out of the room. Neil tried to fight for his arm back, to get back to Andrew’s side, to take his hand again. This wasn’t happening, he couldn’t believe that it was happening. His heart was racing, pounding in his throat in a mockery of the continuous sound of Andrew’s heartrate monitor. 

“Stop, Neil!” Aaron snapped, pushing Neil against the wall outside. 

"What's going?" Neil croaked. Aaron’s face was chalky and dark purple rings around his eyes made him look like he’d been in a fight. Neil could almost see him reminding himself of their deal and finding his bearings.

"He's coding. Flatlining. His heart-" Aaron's words were cut off by the sound in Andrew's room.

"Clear!" A female shouted firmly, followed by a charge and a jolting sound. Neil reacted before he could think. His heart hit the ground and he lunged forward to the door, panic exploding behind his ribs. Aaron, whether still counting on his reflexes from Exy or just pre-empting Neil, grabbed him around the waist, pinning Neil's arms to his side.

"Neil, stop! You can't go in there; you can't get in the way! The doctors are doing their thing, you have to trust them!" Aaron was yelling, struggling as Neil tried to fight free. "Stop, Neil! Stop! Shush, it’s okay, just stop yelling!”

"Clear!" The voice yelled again, the sick charge and jolt echoing down the hall, the incessant flat beep underlining every panicked thump of Neil's heart. Neil could hear Aaron trying to calm him down, the chaos in the hospital room, and he could hear his own haggard breathing that sounded suspiciously like he was screaming for 'Drew', over and over again. _For better or for worse. In sickness and in health. Until death do us part._ Neil wasn’t ready. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end. He could feel bile rising in the back of his throat as he fought to get back to Andrew. _Not parting yet! Not yet!_

“Let me go!” Neil cried, nearly pulling Aaron off his feet as he lurched forward.

"Hey, you have to get him out of here," a nurse said, rushing towards them with a panicked look on her face.

"I’m fucking trying," Aaron snapped.

"He's going to distress other patients and families!" She hissed. Neil didn't see how he was distressing others, he wasn't even sure he was breathing anymore, just straining to hear the noise in the other room, silently willing the whine to stop.

"His husband just flatlined, can you go, please?" Aaron begged.

“I can’t go, I need him to calm down,” the nurse said, getting in Neil’s face as if to touch him or try and intervene. “He’s going to be sick if he keeps shouting like that,” she observed. Her face was blurry, an inconsequential shape in the way, and Neil wanted to push her away, but he couldn’t with Aaron’s grip.

“Clear!” The voice inside yelled again, and Neil moaned as the word stabbed him in the stomach. There was a moment of silence as everyone took a breath.  
 _Beep. Beep. Beep._   
Neil would have fallen down in relief if Aaron wasn't still restraining him. As it was, Aaron sank down to his knees with him, controlling Neil's own descent. Aaron let go when Neil had his knees and hands on the cold linoleum, both breathing hard.

"Are you alright?" The nurse asked softly.

"Please, just go," Aaron asked her. Neil sat on his heels and put his hands to his face, unsurprised to find tears on his cheeks, but he couldn't say if they were from the fear or the relief. Through a blurry gaze, Neil saw the nurse hesitantly turn and walk away. Neil's chest was hurting, and his throat felt torn to shreds, but the beeping of Andrew's heart monitor was loud and clear.

"He fucking died," Neil managed to croak. Aaron put his hand on Neil's shoulder and when he looked at his brother-in-law, he saw Aaron's eyes were red from his own tears.

"He's not dead," Aaron said.

"He was," Neil said. Aaron just nodded and sat back on his heels too. They must have looked ridiculous, on their knees with red eyes and exhausted faces. Neil hooked his index finger through the ring around his neck and wiped his face on his sleeve. Aaron let go to wipe his own face and the door opened to let out a small team of medical professionals. They all paused when they saw the two men on the ground, but the lead doctor waved the group away and looked down at them when the three of them were alone.

“Are you okay?” She asked. Neil got up from the ground, his knees weak, and reached down to help Aaron up at his side.

“We’ve been better,” Aaron muttered.

“Who are you?” The doctor asked, although her tone was soft and sympathetic. She looked a little closer at Aaron and her smile was small. “Okay, I can guess who you are…” she allowed.

“I’m his husband,” Neil answered. Realisation dawned on her face and she nodded slowly.

“I get it,” she promised. “He’s stable again, but we’re keeping the crash cart in his room.”

“What happens now?” Neil asked. “Medication? Surgery?” He guessed. Aaron made a sound of hesitation, but it was the doctor’s deep sigh as she braced herself for the conversation that put Neil on guard.

“We’ve pumped his stomach, and we gave him the equivalent of an antidote for the overdose, and we have him on oxygen, and we can keep trying to bring him back if he crashes like he just did… but, there’s nothing more that we can do. It’s up to him now,” she answered. Neil felt the words grab him by the throat and hold him there.

“Am I going to have to… to turn off the life support and…?” He choked. Aaron put his hand on Neil’s shoulder again, and for once in his life, Neil let himself draw strength from it.

“That’s not something to think about right now, his brain waves are still active, he is in great shape, he’s young, we’re optimistic. It’s just going to take time, and we’re going to take it day by day,” she assured him.

“Minute by minute,” Aaron agreed.

“Okay,” Neil mumbled. Aaron let go of him and moved back to the door without looking back. The doctor tilted her head to say that Neil could go after him, so he followed the short blonde back into Andrew’s room. Andrew didn’t look like he’d been disturbed at all, but Neil spent a minute standing at the door watching the heartrate monitor, waiting for change again. He only moved again when Aaron held the blanket out for him. He shook his head and sank down in his chair at the bedside again, across from Aaron.

“I feel empty,” Neil told him. Aaron nodded in agreement and pulled his knees to his chest on his chair, the blanket around him like a cape. Neil managed to sit still for upwards of five minutes, hugging his own knees, when the stillness and the silence got to be too much.   
“Were you asleep?” He asked Aaron. He nodded again and licked his lips.

“Yeah. I woke up to my brother flatlining,” he confirmed. “I do not recommend it,” he added with a weak smile. Neil huffed a laugh and shook his head. He could admit that if he had to be stuck in Andrew’s hospital room with someone, it wasn’t the worst thing for that someone to be Aaron.

“Are we allowed to read the chart?” Neil asked him. Aaron lifted his head up, looking for a second like a meerkat.

“Huh?”

“The chart? At the end of his bed…” Neil said, pointing at the little plastic sleeve with the clipboard of reports and information about Andrew on it.

“Oh, yeah. Legally, they can’t stop you,” he answered. Neil unfolded himself and padded over to the chart and pulled it out. It took him less than thirty seconds to realise he didn’t understand any of the jargon and he scowled at it.

“Can you read it?” Neil asked, holding it out to Aaron who just glared at him.

“What the fuck, Neil? Of course I know how to fucking read, we went to college together,” he snapped. Neil rolled his eyes at him.

“No, dickhead. I mean I can’t read it, it’s doctor speak, can you tell me if any of it’s important?” Neil said. Aaron looked a little sheepish, and then he looked a little smug as he reached his hand out. Neil passed it over and watched him scan it. At one point, his eyebrows rose nearly comically, and he let out a loud breath.

“Well, he was dosed with enough Rohypnol and ketamine to knock Matt on his ass, so it’s a miracle that Andrew is alive,” he said quietly.

“Both?” Neil asked, taking back the chart to put it away.

“Yep,” Aaron confirmed, his eyes appraising as he studied Neil. “You probably saved his life, getting him here as fast as you did,” he added. Neil wasn’t really in the mood to take the credit for that.

“I should thank Roland then,” he muttered.

“Why?” Aaron asked. Neil shrugged and dug his phone out of his pocket.

“I went to Roland for answers when Andrew was showing signs of being drugged and he told me to call an ambulance, so I did,” he explained. He found Roland’s number in his phone and sent him a quick text. _Calling ambulance saved his life, thanks for being on it. You or cops find anything on the tapes?_

“That was smart of both of you,” Aaron allowed. Neil didn’t look up at him, just watched the dots pulse on his screen that told him Roland was replying. _All good man, it’s my job and you did good spotting the signs!! Take some of the credit, Neil :) As for cops- they have the tapes and taken some witness statements. They’ll come find you and Kevin later today for questions and do their investigation. All good your end?_

“Cops will need witness statements,” Neil told Aaron who just made an agreeable noise. _Stable, unconscious, and in ICU. Drs are hopeful, apparently. Will add you to updates group chat,_ Neil sent before doing just that. Roland sent Neil a thumbs up emoji just before Neil slid his phone away. He took Andrew’s hand again and closed his eyes, keeping one finger on Andrew’s pulse.

The silence stretched out between the two men adjacent from each other for a while after that. Neither of them had anything conducive to say, and they both needed to process the events of the last twelve hours in their own ways. Neil ran through them over, and over, and over in his head until he felt panicky and then counted as high as he could in every language he knew until he calmed down using Andrew’s pulse to guide the speed of his counting. Aaron sat in silence with his eyes closed and his lips thin, but Neil didn’t miss the way his hands were trembling slightly.   
“Let’s go eat,” Aaron said at a little after twelve. They’d been sitting silent for close to three hours and they needed to move and stretch, and Neil – he had to admit – was a little bit hungry.

“And drink too,” Neil agreed, his mouth dry and sour tasting. Aaron nodded and they uncurled themselves stiffly from their chairs, stretching out their legs and arms as if they’d done warmup laps back at the Foxhole Court. “Is it okay to leave him alone?”

“Yeah, he won’t wake up in the next hour. It’ll be good for us to eat outside,” Aaron answered, glancing over his shoulder at Andrew once before leaving. Neil gnawed on his cheek and looked at Andrew for a long moment, debating, but he knew Aaron was right and he had agreed to let him take control of the situation, so he followed him out. Aaron was waiting for him, but he didn’t look disgruntled by the hold up. They matched each other stride for stride to the cafeteria, picked up dry sandwiches and bottles of water before finding a bench outside to eat. It was cold, a little chilly for a South Carolina fall, so they hunched down in their sweatshirts, hoods pulled up, and they sat as close to each other as they dared.

“Do you like spinach?” Neil asked, pulling he dark green leaves out of his sandwich.

“Yeah,” Aaron answered. “Do you like tomato?”

“Yes,” Neil confirmed, and they wordlessly swapped the vegetables with each other and stuffed them into their own sandwiches.

“Thanks,” Aaron said quietly, and Neil knew he was saying thank you for more than just the greens. It was a thank you for caring about Andrew. For understanding how terrifying it was to be faced with the prospect of losing him. For wanting him to be okay and knowing he was worth saving.

“Yeah, you too,” Neil muttered around his bite of sandwich.

After an hour, as long as they dared stay away, they walked back to the room together. Aaron made a short call on the way, to a professor by the sound of it, asking for two days off from his rotation because of a family emergency, and judging by the relieved sag of his shoulders, he’d been granted the reprieve. Silently they agreed to detour to the bathroom, which meant they had to pass a nurse’s station and someone inside grinned at Aaron and waved. Aaron made a very unhappy noise in his throat, but swallowed it when the stranger came out of the room towards them. Neil didn’t like the smiley look on his face, it didn’t match the sharp glean in his eyes.   
“Hey, Minyard,” he said.

“Hi, Stentson,” Aaron replied. In any other situation, Neil would have shrugged and walked off, leaving Aaron to face who Neil assumed was one of his peers, but too much had happened since the clock turned over to midnight for Neil to do that today.

“Someone wearing your face is in my ward,” the man said, his tone playful and he jokingly ribbed Aaron with his elbow, but Neil’s hackles were raised.

“Not the time, Stentson,” Aaron warned, pushing the other student doctor’s arm away.

“Aww, why so moody, Minyard?” He teased. “Isn’t he the psycho from the news all those years ago? Kind of a miracle he ended up with me in the ICU and not with you in psych huh? Not surprised it’s an overdose though…”

“You can’t say shit like that to me you fucking basta– ” Aaron cut his own angry tirade in half. “Neil, don’t!” He cried, snatching Neil’s arm before he even realised he was swinging. He diverted the punch just in time, and the only thing that stopped Neil from going again was Aaron’s firm words that followed. “You’ll get taken by security and they won’t let you back in.”

“I’ll fucking kill him,” Neil seethed, glaring at the stranger. His heart was hammering hot fury through his body and Aaron was right to keep a strong grip on his elbow. It didn’t matter that it was along the same vein of conversation as what Neil had said in the early hours of that same morning when he’d been allowed back to see Andrew. It wasn’t okay coming from someone else’s mouth.

“Aren’t you Neil Josten? Don’t you hate the other Minyard? Why are you even here?” The man demanded, but he had taken a decent step back and was looking uncomfortable.

“Listen here, fuckface,” Neil snapped. “I will have you murdered in your sleep if you even look at me again or mention anything about me being here to anyone – including the press – and if you don’t believe me then I recommend you Google my name and find out who my father was and who I was raised to be.” The words were cold, his voice colder, and the man swallowed loudly and took another step back.

“Easy buddy, I won’t say anything,” he said. He clearly knew who Neil was, that he used to be Nathaniel Wesninski, and Neil had to trust that this jerk would be scared enough to keep his mouth firmly shut. Aaron shoved Neil in the direction of the bathroom again, and once inside, Aaron whirled on him.

“Last I heard, you’d renounced murder, mafia ties, and family legacies,” he said, but he didn’t sound angry, just curious and calculating.

“I have renounced the family legacy of being a serial killer,” Neil insisted. “And, I mean, my uncle is still a gangster and I still pay the Moriyamas for my life so like… I can’t really cut ties with the mafia.”

“Murder?” Aaron pressed. Neil held his hands up in surrender.

“I won’t kill him,” he promised. Aaron just raised an eyebrow and Neil sighed. “I can have him killed, I will be seeing my uncle in a couple months anyway, but I won’t… unless you want me to?”

“No!” Aaron hissed.

“Cool, because it isn’t something I really want to get involved in,” Neil agreed.

“Sometimes I wonder why I’m not scared of you,” Aaron muttered. Neil’s smile was small and fleeting as he made eye contact with Aaron in the mirror.

“Because you have seen me broken and beaten, and you know I wouldn’t have you killed because it would upset Andrew,” he answered. Aaron rolled his eyes, but for once, he didn’t look annoyed by something Neil had said.

*

After an hour of sleep with his head resting on the mattress at Andrew’s side, Neil woke up and started reading the book Andrew had yet to finish. Aaron spent most of the afternoon on his phone and when Neil asked what he was doing, he pushed his glasses up his nose and explained that he’d asked Katelyn to send him pictures from his textbooks so that he could study from the hospital. Neil didn’t really have anything to say to that, so he just went back to reading the book to himself and left him to it.   
Andrew didn’t have any more complications after that, which helped Neil relax again, and as the time wound down to the evening, he put his book away and leaned over Andrew to prod Aaron in the shoulder.   
“You should go home,” he said. Aaron clearly didn’t appreciate the suggestion judging by the glare.

“Fuck you.”

“I mean it, Aaron. You cancelled your work thing, right? Go home and sleep in a real bed, god knows how long you’ve been at this hospital. Eat, see Katelyn, pack your own bag and textbooks and stuff. Come back tomorrow morning,” he said. Aaron still didn’t look impressed as he crossed his arms.

“Why are you trying to get rid of me?” He asked, distrust and suspicion not unfamiliar on his face. Neil sat back in his chair and pulled one knee to his chest.

“I’m not. You sent me home to sleep and eat, now it’s your turn. Go to the Columbia house if you want, Abby and Betsy will have a field day making a fuss over you. Just come back by ten tomorrow so I can go to the station and give my witness statement,” Neil said. His skin felt crawly every time he remembered the appointment that he’d made with the local police force to give his statement, still not trusting or being comfortable around the authorities, but at least he was who he said he was now and had the legitimate identification to prove it. Abby had called him earlier that afternoon to see how he was holding up and in a moment of weakness, he’d asked her to pick him up from the hospital and take him so that he didn’t have to deal with strangers in rideshares or public transport. He felt a little silly asking his surrogate parent to take him, but he felt more comfortable with Abby than he did with an Uber right then.

“And if I don’t?” Aaron asked. Neil shrugged at him and put his chin on his knee.

“Doesn’t bother me, but I’ll want my blanket back when I try to sleep,” he said. Aaron surveyed him for a long moment before getting to his feet and shoving his phone in his pocket with a weary nod.

“Did you want me to bring you any food before I go, or anything from home when I come back?” Aaron asked from the doorway. Neil considered the question, but he couldn’t find anything in his brain bank that he would need so he shook his head. “Okay, look after my brother,” Aaron mumbled with a small wave, his keys jingling where he had them looped over a finger.

*

Sleeping on the floor of a hospital room with only his arms and the corner of a blanket for a pillow had left Neil feeling sore and grouchy, and it had only been made mildly better by Aaron throwing a cushion from his couch at home at Neil’s head at a little after five the next morning. He’d managed to get another two hours of relative piece before waking up fully and stretching because of the smell of caffeine. As he’d drank his coffee and eaten the muffin Aaron palmed off on him, he’d been given a brief run down by Aaron. Kevin and Thea were extending their stay by a week, but they were moving to the same hotel as Allison and Renee, and their friend was paying for Heather and Will to come down at Heather’s request. Olivia was staying behind for another week and moved to the hotel, but Riley was going back to Chicago for her store and promised to look after Andrew’s house plants. Betsy and Abby had claimed Aaron’s old room, Nicky was back in his, and Oscar, Dante and Jaiden were at the hotel. Jackson was, as they spoke, loading the cats into his car and driving down to stay on Aaron’s couch. Matt, Dan and little Holly were going to drive up as well, but with their precious cargo they were taking their time, and Neil immediately texted them telling them they didn’t have to. Dan had promised him that family did this kind of thing, especially their family, and Neil hadn’t argued.  
“Why is everyone doing this? Rearranging their lives for Andrew?”

“Beats me,” Aaron had deadpanned, but Neil could see he was feeling a little choked up by the old Foxes, family and new friends coming together to support him, Neil and be there for Andrew.

Before Neil left to get into Abby’s car and go back to the house to brush his teeth and shower before the witness interview, the first of the well-wishing gifts arrived. A small bouquet of dark red, purple and black roses- that Neil didn’t know existed- came from Jackson with a card that said, ‘ _Getting yourself put in hospital is a low way to get out of training with me, man. Anyway, these flowers didn’t grow out of their emo phase either. Get better soon <3’. _Dan and Matt’s ginormous bouquet of over the top colour arrived with it, _‘We couldn’t find anything you might actually like so we just went all in on something so horrific it might amuse you when you wake up. See you soon, when you’re better!’._ The third gift was from Renee and Allison and it was one of those big candy bouquets with Andrew’s favourite candies and chocolates in an arrangement that looked like flowers, _‘Get better soon, Andrew. I miss you already, and Allison is a little worried too even if she won’t tell you that herself. You’re strong, and brave, I know you’ll come back. -R xx’._ Neil and Aaron hadn’t really been expecting anything to be gifted so they spent about five minutes trying to work out what to do with them before Aaron pointed at the door and told Neil to beat it, so he did.

Neil hadn’t expected the police interview to go for long because he hadn’t seen anything suspicious from the dance floor, he’d just been there to deal with the downfall. As it was, they had wrung him dry physically and emotionally for two hours, and more than once Neil had to be restrained by a secondary cop to stop him from lunging at the main interviewer for his insinuations that Andrew would do this to himself. In the last thirty minutes, they admitted to seeing a man spike Andrew’s drink on Roland’s cameras, but they’d been hoping pressure would make Neil remember something helpful. Neil had just sat there stony faced and silent after that and didn’t even open his mouth again until they dismissed him.   
“Hey, you don’t look too good,” Abby said carefully when he found her in the waiting area at the front of the station. “Worse than when you went in, anyway.”

“Thanks Abs,” he grumbled. She got to her feet and put her arm around his shoulder, and he let himself be guided out of the police station to where she’d parked her car.

“Can I take you back to the house for some lunch?” She asked. Neil’s gut reaction was to say no, demand that he be taken back to the hospital so that he could be with Andrew again, but when he looked at her in the driver’s seat, he felt that resolve crumbling. She looked tired, and sad and worried, but most of all she looked hopeful. He chewed on his lip and checked his phone, but there was nothing there from Aaron demanding he come back or saying things had gone wrong. He looked up at her again and slowly nodded his head, guilt for leaving Andrew an ache in the pit of his stomach that he only just managed to keep at bay by reminding himself that Andrew wasn’t alone.   
They drove back to the house in silence, Neil burrowed down in the clean hoodie he’d changed into before the appointment. It was Andrew’s dark blue one that had orange on the pockets. Neil was pretty sure Andrew only wore it because Neil had bought it for him a couple months ago, and even though it was still fairly new, it smelled like him. When they walked in, Nicky fell over himself to hug Neil. He was clearly jetlagged, emotional and exhausted, but he managed somewhat of a cocky smile when he let Neil go.

“Little asshole, getting married in secret,” he said. “I haven’t gotten you a gift yet, but Allison is going to come here tomorrow some time to organise the reception you didn’t have, okay?”

“Why?” Neil asked, more than a little incredulous. “We don’t know if or when Andrew is waking up, let alone when he’ll be in the mood to party.”

“Neil, sweetheart, I think Nicky and Allison just need a project to work on to keep themselves busy right now,” Abby said softly from his side. Neil peered up into Nicky’s face, saw how red his eyes were from crying and how the smile was merely a mockery of his usual one.

“I need the optimism, kid,” Nicky added quietly, ruffling Neil’s hair.

“Okay,” Neil said. “Organise away. Just, no themes and no weird cake topper groom things.”

“Done,” Nicky agreed. “I’m going to go to my room and call Erik, he’s organising his tickets to come next week. Hopefully, Andrew will be awake by then, but we’re gonna stick around for a month or two.”

“Sure,” Neil said, just because Nicky was looking at him expectantly. The older man walked to his room straight after and Neil let himself be herded into the kitchen where Betsy was baking.

“Hello,” she said warmly. Neil parked himself on a stool and Abby joined Betsy on the other side of the counter to make him lunch.

“Is a toasted sandwich alright?” She asked.

“Great,” Neil confirmed because anything would be better than yet another dry hospital cafeteria sandwich. Betsy held out a cookie tray towards Neil, but he shook his head at her and she didn’t look offended by the rejection. Instead, she came around and sat down on the stool next to him, freeing up the kitchen to Abby.

“How are you feeling?” She asked. Neil just raised his eyebrows at her. He wasn’t in the habit, brief phone call yesterday aside, in being all that open with the woman. He’d barely touched on his own state of wellbeing with Abby and at least her Neil considered part of his family. Betsy was an extension of Andrew’s family, and just because they were married didn’t mean he had to be touchy-feely with her. Betsy waited patiently beside him for a moment before nodding in understanding, probably having expected his silence. “It’s really good to see that you’ve leaned into your support network,” she observed.

“I’m not sure I had a choice,” he admitted wryly. She smiled affectionately at him.

“No, I don’t think you did either,” she agreed.

“I don’t really understand why everyone has rearranged their entire lives to come here, or stay here,” he said to both women. Abby reached over the counter to squeeze his hand before going back to slicing cheese.

“You and Andrew are important to these people, they want to be close to help you if you need it, and the minute they’re allowed to see Andrew I am sure they will want to,” Betsy answered. It felt like such a foreign concept to Neil. He’d had a few hours to process it, but it still hadn’t sunk in.

“It’s just… strange,” he said.

“Coming from your backgrounds, and from what we know of how Andrew has been treated by people in the past, I’m sure it is a bit of a new situation to be involved in,” Betsy agreed. Neil nodded, reaching past her to the fruit bowl that seemed to have magically stocked itself with oranges.

“Yeah,” he mumbled, digging his thumb under the skin to peel it. He wasn’t even really that hungry, he was eating because Abby had asked him to and he picked up the orange because he felt like he needed to be doing something with his hands. It helped to have something else to focus on so that he didn’t have to look at Betsy either.

“Aaron told us this morning what happened yesterday,” Betsy said gently. “When Andrew flatlined?”

“Cool,” Neil muttered, but his heart jumped at her words. He’d processed it, accepted that it had happened, and he was absolutely terrified of it happening again, and even more scared that if it did happen that he wouldn’t come back from that.

“When we spoke on the phone yesterday, you mentioned some feelings of guilt and I just wanted to see where you were with that,” Betsy continued. Neil froze what he was doing and flicked a glance at Abby whose expression was pained.

“I’d already mentioned to Betsy that I was worried you would shoulder blame for this,” Abby said when she caught his eye. “She didn’t confirm or deny the truth, but I knew I was right.”

“Well, yeah,” Neil said quietly. The orange was completely peeled now, and he busied his fingers by tearing it into the smaller segments, orange juice running down his skin and onto the countertop.

“It isn’t your fault, Neil,” Abby set quietly, taking the orange peel away and wiping the juice up. Neil gritted his teeth, too stubborn to really relinquish the guilt he was feeling. When she put a plate down in front of him for the orange, he set it down, and then a toasted cheese sandwich on a second plate was put next to it, followed by a glass of water. He stared at his lunch and willed away tears as guilt, fear, sadness toiled with the overwhelming feeling of being cared about, deep in his stomach.

“I feel like it is,” he told them both, ignoring the voice in the back of his head that reminded him Betsy was a shrink and that he didn’t trust her. At the moment, she was just as worried as he was for someone they both cared about and that meant she was on his side at least for the day.

“Why, sweetheart?” Abby asked, leaning her elbows on the counter.

“It’s because of me that he even came down for Halloween and went to Eden’s, for one. Secondly, I left him for a little while and went dancing. He was getting his own drinks, he was sitting just with some of the girls for an hour, and he got hurt. That’s my fault,” he said. He had to swallow the build up of tears swelling in his throat, behind his eyes,nd his chest felt tight. “He was dead, for nearly three minutes, and that’s because I let him down. And now it’s two days until his birthday and he might sleep through it.”

“Do you really believe that this is all because you wanted to celebrate Halloween at your old club with your friends?” Abby asked him. Neil nodded down at his lunch, unable to look her in the eye.

“That’s not being fair to you, or even to Andrew and the girls,” Betsy added.

“What?” Neil spluttered, wanting to hear the logic behind that observation.

“Well, it sounds like you’re saying that they couldn’t look after themselves. That without you, they’re vulnerable,” Betsy said, her tone matter of fact. Neil frowned at her, feeling as if his words were being twist.

“I’m pretty sure, if anyone had seen Andrew’s drink get spiked, they would have done something about it,” Abby agreed before he lip twitched in a small smile. “If Andrew had of seen, well, there would have been no hope for the guy. Andrew would have torn him to pieces.”

“True,” Neil agreed. “But they didn’t see. I might have if I’d been there.”

“Neil,” Abby said gently, taking his hand. “You don’t have to put this pressure on yourself,” she promised him.

“Do you think Andrew would blame you?” Betsy asked. Neil blanched at the question, but the two women just stayed quiet and waited for him to regroup. Would Andrew blame him? If Neil was being honest with himself, Andrew probably wouldn’t. He could imagine Andrew’s fingers in his hair, his palm on the back of his neck, looking into his face with an impassive expression other than the slight tug between his eyebrows. _Not your fault, idiot. Now eat your damn lunch._

“Probably not,” he mumbled, his stomach growling hungrily at him.

“No, I don’t think so,” Betsy agreed. Abby pushed the sandwich closer to him and let go of his hand, but she didn’t move away. Neil picked up one of the halves and put it in his mouth.

“You’re being a good husband,” Abby promised. That made it hard for Neil to swallow his bite of sandwich. He didn’t feel like a good husband, especially because he was there and not at the hospital.

“You don’t feel like you’re being a good husband while you’re here, do you?” Betsy guessed, a small shiver of discomfort at being known running down his spine.

“Yeah,” he confirmed.

“Let me ask you this,” Betsy said, causing Neil to sigh. “Nothing about you two has been traditional, ever, at all, so why do you feel guilty for not being the weeping spouse at the hospital bed? You’re proactively trying to help them find out who hurt him, and you have closed ranks with Aaron to make sure he’s being looked after, and you are doing the one thing that is most important to Andrew…”

“What?” Neil asked, weakening with curiosity.

“You are still looking after yourself,” she said, a fond smile. Neil rolled his eyes and stuffed more food in his mouth.

“Hey, you know she’s right. You’re the most important thing in Andrew’s life. When he wakes up, he’d be more upset if you were ten pounds lighter and suffering from scurvy on the floor of his hospital room than if you were getting lunch or sleep,” Abby added. Neil felt like he was being tag teamed. He also knew that they were right.

“Yeah,” he sighed. He saw Abby and Betsy share a look out of the corner of his eye, but he went back to finishing his sandwich.

“Do you need some sleep before you head back?” Abby asked.

“Um, no, I should go back when I’m done eating,” he answered, swallowing the last bite of the sandwich and tapping the plate with the orange on it.

“Alright, sweetheart,” Abby said.

“Will you take some cookies with you?” Betsy asked. “I stress bake and there’s too much here for just us,” she said.

“Oh, sure I can take some,” he agreed. “Our friends in the hotel might want some too?” He suggested.

“You better not take all of them!” Nicky said, coming into the kitchen. He looked a little drawn, and it was possible he’d been crying again, but he pinched a segment of orange and leaned his hip on the counter like it was any other day.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Neil replied, reaching out to take his orange piece back, but Nicky danced out of reach and shoved it in his mouth, making juice dribble down his chin. Neil managed a small smile and shook his head at him, making himself comfortable with the rest of the orange.

“I’m going to pack some food and drinks in a bag for you,” Abby said.

“Yes, and I have put some stuff in a bag for you and Andrew, let me go get it,” Betsy agreed, getting off the seat. Neil was curious and watched her go, but he was distracted by Nicky trying to steal another piece of orange and had to defend the food he didn’t want a moment ago. When the orange was safe, he reached for the fruit bowl and grabbed a new one and threw it at Nicky who caught it before it hit him in the face.

“You’re a jerk,” Nicky told him.

“You’re a thief,” Neil shot back.

“Pot, kettle, black,” Nicky replied easily, peeling the fruit. Neil shook his head, but finished his orange and when Betsy came back with a bag, he looked through it quickly. It had a couple more books in it, some changes of clothes from their room, and surprisingly enough, it had a framed picture of the First Foxes and a group picture from the pre-championship party. A container of hazelnut coco powder, a bag of teabags, a second pillow and a puzzle completed the contents.

“Maybe you and Aaron can do the puzzle when you’re bored,” Betsy said. Neil could imagine the look on Andrew’s face when he woke up and he and Aaron were doing a puzzle on the tray beside his bed.

“Thanks, Bee,” he said.

“Come on, let’s get you back,” Abby said, holding out a second bag of fruit, sandwiches, cookies, and there was also a salad he wasn’t going to touch. Neil slid from the seat with the two bags, let Nicky and Betsy hug him goodbye, before he followed Abby back out of the house to her car.

*

When Neil returned to the hospital and found his way back to Andrew's room, Aaron had the light on and was using the tray table to study on. His hair was a mess from where he'd been running his hands through it and he had the arm of his glasses clamped between his teeth as he held a textbook ridiculously close to his face. He'd never asked either twin what their prescriptions were for, he'd just accepted that they both had extremely bad vision.

"Hey," Neil said, setting the new bags with his old one out of the way. Aaron grunted in greeting, but didn't look up. "Are you staying here tonight?"

"Yes, this isn't a night shift/day shift arrangement," he answered, putting the book down.

"Didn't think it was, but you only got two days off your class rotation thing, don't you have to go back tomorrow?" Neil said. Aaron considered that for a moment, running the end of his glasses along his lip.

"I'll be in the psych ward tomorrow, yeah, but I'll be okay. I can't be late if I sleep here," he said. "I have the fourth off anyway, so one more shift this week won't kill me."

"For your birthday?" Neil guessed. Aaron shook his head before putting his glasses on his face like they're supposed to be.

"No, it just worked out like that," he admitted. "Katie and I were going to go to New York for a couple nights," he added. He looked at Andrew and glared at him, but there was no genuine anger or heat in the look. "You ruin everything, you know that?"

"Easy," Neil told him, but he couldn't muster any threat or warning. If it had been anyone else, Neil might have thrown a punch, but this was Aaron and was probably the only other person in the world who could get away with it. "If you haven't eaten yet, there's some food in one of those bags," he said, pointing. Aaron waved that away and went back to his studies. Neil sat down and took Andrew's hand in his own, fidgeting with his familiar fingers for a couple of minutes as he went over the conversation with Betsy and Abby again. He knew they were right, but it didn't ease the guilt or the worry chewing an ulcer into his stomach.   
After twenty minutes, Aaron threw a highlighter at him and it bounced of his shoulder.  
"Your fidgeting is distracting, go for a run or something," he scolded. Neil sneered at him, but he had a point. It was only two in the afternoon; Neil couldn't sit still and fidget with his unconscious husband's fingers until he fell asleep. He sighed and went looking for the stupid puzzle in his bag. Andrew was better at puzzles that Neil was, it wasn't all that strange for pieces to be scattered across their dining room table for a week as Andrew worked through one. He had more patience for it, was better at seeing the patterns and pieces than Neil was, and he liked working on the quiet, solitary project where he could see his progress. Still it was something for Neil to try and keep himself busy with, the only issue was that Aaron had claimed the table. Neil picked up the box, a cushion to sit on and wedged himself into the corner of the room near the window that was as far out the way as he could be. He knew Aaron was tracking his movements as he went, and he cracked when Neil opened the box to upend the thousand pieces on the floor.   
“What the everloving fuck are you doing?” He demanded. Neil just shrugged and put the lid with the picture against the wall so he could keep an eye on it, and started sorting the centre pieces back into the box so he was left with the flat-edged side pieces like he’d seen Andrew do before. “You’re so weird,” Aaron told him, going back to his textbooks and notes. Neil couldn’t really argue with that, and he didn’t feel the need to snipe back at him even though he did think it was weird that Aaron was studying to be a doctor in a patient’s bedroom. Just like him, Aaron needed to keep himself busy.

Neil ate dinner standing up, unashamedly using the corner of Aaron’s tray table to put his food. He needed to stretch his legs and ease the ache in his spine from sitting still on the pillow on the floor. Aaron made an annoyed noise at him but moved his pens to the side so that he could take up some of the space. Aaron ate chicken and cheese sandwiches and the salad that Abby had palmed off on Neil, but Neil picked the tomatoes out and ate them before he handed it over. Neil’s dinner consisted of fresher-than-cafeteria roast beef sandwiches and a bunch of grapes.   
“What are you working on?” Neil asked. Aaron looked unimpressed by the question, or maybe just by the attempt for conversation, and he twirled his pen through his fingers for a moment.

“You’re not going to understand it,” Aaron warned. Neil knew he was probably right, but the assumption rubbed him the wrong way.

“Try me,” he said, crossing his arms. Aaron just rolled his eyes and moved the textbook so that Neil could see the page he’d been reading. Aaron pointed at a diagram of a heart and went on to explain the particular surgery technique – something to do with arteries – and even though it was of no interest to Neil, he was determined to understand. In some ways, it did make sense. Neil could appreciate the precision and the logic, and he could make sense of the math-like formulas needed, but there was a whole other layer of complexity. Still, Aaron clearly started to enjoy sharing his knowledge and it killed about three hours of their time, and Neil even had a go at some of the exercises in the textbook. He barely passed, but he was still a little proud of himself for getting any of it right at all because it was a third-year postgrad med student textbook.

“I guess you aren’t entirely stupid,” Aaron muttered, closing his notebook after marking the last of the exercises.

“Thanks,” Neil replied with a snort. “I still don’t want to be a doctor.”

“You’d be a terrible doctor,” Aaron said dismissively.

“You won’t be,” Neil told him. Aaron crossed his arms over the tray and rested his chin on them, going a little cross-eyed as he looked at the closed textbook.

“God, what universe are we living in where you give me compliments?” He asked. Neil shrugged and pushed away from the table to go back to his puzzle, answering over his shoulder as he went.

“An alternate one.” He sat down on his pillow again and yawned as he looked down at the jigsaw. He hadn’t done much, just sorted out the pieces and the border in the four hours between starting and eating, but it was something, nonetheless. He didn’t really know what to do from here, at this point in the evening he would have turned to a book or a TV show or Exy games, moving to sit on the couch behind Andrew then next to him at the coffee table. Logically, he assumed sorting out the centre pieces into colours would make his life easier, so he started doing that. After twenty minutes, Aaron moved to sit across from him with a scowl. Neil raised an eyebrow at him when he reached into the box and started helping organising the pieces into sections.

“Alternate universe, right?” He muttered. Neil shrugged and they worked in silence until they grew tired enough to sleep. They used their own blankets and pillows and slept on opposite sides of the room. Neil was sure there was meant to be regular visiting hours, or rules on the number of visitors in a room, and probably against people curling up and sleeping on the floor, nevertheless, he wasn’t going to question it. But he did make a mental note to see if Kevin or some other friend of theirs had made a donation to the hospital in the past twenty-four or so hours.

*

Neil and Aaron bickered over the puzzle for most of the next day. Aaron threatened to put it back in the box a total of 14 times between them waking up at 7 in the morning and him leaving for his shift at 8 that evening. Neil smacked his hand away four times and threatened to lock him out of the room another six times. Still, Aaron startled a laugh out of Neil a few times and Neil in turn had Aaron not quite laughing, but not quite sullen and miserable either. They'd found even ground in the hospital room, found their feet, and for the first time maybe ever, they saw each other as equals. Nicky was allowed to visit and he cried silently at Andrew's side for a few minutes, and spent another fifteen minutes trying to do the puzzle and getting in the way. He was the one who received the flowers and gifts as well, equally teary as he was giggly as he put the candy bouquet from Heather and Will with Renee and Allison's, and the fluffy Lion toy from Oscar, Dante and Jaiden on the bedside table near the pictures Neil had put up. Their team management also sent an obnoxious flower arrangement that was put with Dan's, but what was more surprising was the big helium balloon in the shape of a lion that came from Calum and Josh. When Nicky left, it was with a promise that he was meeting Allison for dinner to plan the wedding reception they should have had. Aaron and Neil choked down more sandwiches before Aaron left for his rotation on the psych ward, and Neil sat down at Andrew's side to read aloud. He'd been reading the book from the start to himself when Aaron was around, but when he was alone with Andrew, he read from where Andrew had dog eared his page. At midnight it would tick over to Andrew's birthday and Neil's heart ached when he thought about Andrew missing the day, so he read until five to eleven before stopping, his throat dry and voice hoarse. While he put the book away, he drank from his drink bottle, and then he took Andrew's dry, cool hand, pressing the long-ago scarred knuckles to his lips.   
"I know you don't like your birthday, but that's not a good enough reason to not wake up," Neil told him. It was probably the first time he'd spoken directly to Andrew, even though Aaron had told him that Andrew could probably hear him. He'd felt hopeless and silly at the thought, but he was starting to feel desperate. He wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his borrowed hoodie as tears pricked his water line.   
"Come on, Drew, I'm tired. I don't wanna sleep on the floor anymore. Wake up so we can go home," he murmured, lips still against his hand. "King and Sir are here, they're at the Columbia house with Abby, Betsy, Wymack and Nicky. Apparently, they won't leave our room and sleep on our pillows. Nicky says they miss us..." Neil trailed off, sighing sadly. "I miss you too. Drew, I need you to wake up. Come back to me, handsome." He put his hand down gently and rested his head on Andrew's bed. "Happy birthday, Andrew," he whispered, pulling his own blanket over his own shoulders and closing his eyes.

Neil's sleep was interrupted every half an hour again, with nurses coming in to do their job politely asking Neil to move out of their way before letting him curl his body against the hard edge of the hospital bed. The blanket was itchy against his cheek, Andrew’s hand warm only because of Neil’s touch, and it took all of Neil’s self-control not to climb up and lie with him. They had shared smaller beds than this in their time, the single bed in college that they’d slept in during Andrew’s last year had been the size of the hospital bed at max, but he knew he wasn’t allowed to and some part of him was too nervous to touch Andrwe’s chest as it rose and fell only by the force of the oxygen being pumped into him. So, Neil stayed in his seat, sleeping fitfully in bursts and disturbed by nurses, until Aaron crept back into the room a little after six in the morning.   
“Happy birthday, asshole,” Neil mumbled when he heard the blonde making himself comfortable on the floor under the window, out of kicking reach of the puzzle.

“Fuck off,” Aaron muttered back, voice thin with exhaustion. Neil closed his eyes again and turned his head to give his neck a break, his breath brushing over Andrew’s fingers and his own wrist as sleep tugged at him again.

*

When Neil woke up properly a couple of hours later, his lower back ached and his neck and shoulders felt out of place, so he quietly left the room to try and not wake Aaron up and used the hallway to stretch. He felt a little ridiculous doing lunges down the sleepy, sick-quiet hallway as nurses and doctors went around, but he needed to move. After lunging, he moved to the side and bent over, hooking his palms under his feet, and folding himself nearly in half. When he righted himself, he pulled one leg up behind him, then his other, breathing deeply. The hallways smelt like antiseptic and it didn’t do any favours to his dry throat, but he was waking up slowly and his muscles were unwinding so it was worth it. Walking back to the room, Neil stretched out his arms and neck and was feeling a little lighter, moving a little freer.   
“Good morning, Mr. Josten,” Jude Carmichael said as she passed. The tall, slim woman was no older than he was, and she was one of Andrew’s most frequent attendants. She also seemed friendly with Aaron, apparently the moody bastard had been making friends in his placements. She’d been kind to Neil, and gentle without treating him like he was about to break like some of the other nurses.

“Hey, Jude, how’s it going?” He replied.

“Can’t complain,” she said over her shoulder, continuing on with her morning rounds. Neil pushed open Andrew’s door and crept in, but he needn’t have bothered because Aaron was sitting against the wall with dishevelled hair and a sour look on his face.

“Morning,” Neil said. Aaron sneered up at him, breath caught in his chest as he stretched his arms over his head. Neil knew he looked as exhausted as Aaron did. Pale, purple rings around their puffy eyes, and moving just that little bit slower than usual.

“Where were you?” Aaron asked as Neil sat down in his chair, dropping his arms into his lap.

“Just in the hall, stretching,” Neil told him. He looked at the bag of food they had, but there wasn’t much left so the pair of them would probably need to get breakfast from the cafeteria and drink bitter, gritty coffee from paper cups. It wasn’t much of a birthday breakfast, but Neil wasn’t one to organise celebrations for Aaron and he suspected the twin wasn’t in much of a celebrating mood anyway. Neil didn’t really feel like eating anyway, so he leaned forward and took Andrew’ hand in his. Aaron got groggily to his feet and made an aborted groaning sound as he twisted from side to side.

“Why are you always so awake in the mornings?” Aaron asked, sinking bleary-eyed into his chair again.

“I wake up at around six, six thirty, every morning and I have for as long as I can remember,” Neil answered. “Besides, I didn’t do a ten-hour overnight shift on a psych ward.”

“You’re not wrong,” Aaron agreed, slumping back. Neil opened his mouth to tell him he looked like shit and possibly suggest he go spend some of the day with Katelyn and get some sleep, but he froze before the words could get out of his mouth. Andrew’s hand twitched in his. He could have sworn he moved. He widened his eyes at Aaron, squeezing back just a little. Aaron sat up straight, tired eyes wide and Neil looked down at his husband.

“He moved,” Neil whispered.

“Are you sure?” Aaron asked. Neil hesitated, but Andrew’s fingers curling a little bit had him nodding his head emphatically and looking at Aaron again.

“Positive,” he said. As if to prove his point, the heartrate monitor beeped out of its familiar harmonious rhythm. A beat, then a double beat, out of line, before it slowly started to increase. Aaron stared at it over his shoulder, but Neil looked down at Andrew. His husband’s fingers moved again, properly curling around Neil’s own hand, holding on. “Drew?” Neil coaxed. “Come on, Andrew, wake up.”

“Andrew?” Aaron prodded carefully. Neil rose out of his chair and squeezed Andrew’s fingers gently.

“Wake up, handsome,” Neil said softly, his voice choking on hope as it ballooned in his ribs and crawled up his throat. Andrew’s eyes flew open, his hand gripping Neil’s nearly painfully. Neil choked again, this time on relief and he squeezed back.

“Thank fucking Christ,” Aaron moaned, but neither had time to celebrate. Andrew’s eyes filled with panic and, as if blinded by it, he started clawing his hand out of Neil’s, mouth open wide as if to yell, but the tube down his throat made that impossible. Neil let go in surprise, but he immediately yanked it back when he saw Andrew reach up for the breathing tube as if to try and yank it out himself. Neil wasn’t a doctor, and this hadn’t been covered in Aaron’s textbook, but he couldn’t imagine yanking it out in the middle of a panic attack would be good for him.

“Andrew! Stop!” Aaron cried.

“Drew! No!” Neil yelled at the same time. Andrew couldn’t hear or he didn’t care, he tried to use his other hand to rip the needle out of the arm restrained by Neil, but Aaron caught it just in time, using his other hand to press the button calling a doctor. Andrew started thrashing, nearly throwing Neil across the bed and Aaron had to move before they collided heads. Neil could feel his own panic filling his body, adrenaline coursing through his blood, as he saw the sheer fear and animalistic fight or flight instinct take over Andrew. Neil knew that waking up with something down your throat preventing you from communicating and needles in your restrained arms could be frightening for anyone, but with Andrew’s history of bedroom horrors, he could understand why Andrew was reacting like he was.

“Hey, Drew, babe, it’s me. It’s Neil,” he said, trying to keep his voice even. “It’s me and Aaron, calm down,” he begged.

“Jesus, man, you’re gonna break something!” Aaron added.

“Yeah, us!” Neil agreed. Aaron levelled an unimpressed look at him. “Drew, you need to calm down. You need to stop, or we can’t help you.”

“I know it feels like you can’t breathe with the tube regulating your breathing, but I promise you that you are getting enough air you just need to calm down,” Aaron said, his voice as close to soothing as Neil had ever heard it. Neil hadn’t even thought of how it must feel to be attempting to hyperventilate with panic when a machine was still controlling your oxygen intake. Andrew’s wild gaze was flicking between Aaron and Neil now, some of the fear dwindling as recognition took its place. Slowly, his legs stopped kicking, his arms sank down to the mattress and his head stopped whipping back and forth. His mouth was still a little open and his nostrils flared as if trying to get more air than he was getting, but the frantic beeping of his heartrate machine started slowing down again and Neil let out a loud sigh.

“Fuck me,” Neil said, feeling a little breathless. Andrew narrowed his eyes at him, which just made Neil smile. “Yeah, I said what I said.”

“Welcome back,” Aaron said. Andrew’s eyes widened a little as if finally realising what was happening, where he was, and what that meant. He squeezed Neil’s hand firmly before tugging his hand free, and this time Neil let him go and trusted him not to be an idiot. Aaron let go too and Andrew did the last thing Neil had expected. With an annoyed look on his face as he turned to his brother, moving his hands. Neil couldn’t translate the ASL, he’d never learned, but he remembered being in LA when the twins realised that they could both communicate with the language.   
“He says he hates the breathing tube and wants it gone,” Aaron said to Neil before glancing back at Andrew. “The doctor will be here in a second to remove it…” he paused to let an irritated Andrew gesticulate at him. “He wants to know how long he’s been unconscious…” Aaron said wearily.

“Oh,” Neil said. It was a fair question, but it was almost uncomfortable to remember what day it was. “Happy birthday…” he said. Aaron sucked his teeth and nodded his head.

“Yeah, happy birthday, bro,” Aaron said. Andrew rolled his eyes and poked his finger at Neil and then at Aaron before making another set of hand gestures. Aaron snorted at whatever he said and translated for Neil.

“He’s calling us idiots for being here after three days.”

“Really?” Neil asked, gently poking him in the rib to get his attention. When Andrew looked at him, Neil could see that behind the obvious fear and irritation at the situation, there was something soft and almost relieved in his hazel eyes. “I distinctly remember something about ‘until death do us part’ or something like that,” he reminded him. Andrew rolled his eyes, but he held his hand out again and Neil slid his hand into it. Andrew’s hand responding to the touch, intertwining their fingers, made Neil’s heart feel as if it was swelling and he pressed a kiss to Andrew’s knuckles.

“Is now a good time to tell him that he did die?” Aaron asked. Andrew’s eyes went wide, and he opened his mouth as if to talk, before glaring at his brother and snapping his mouth shut.

“Oh, Andrew Minyard, you’re awake!” Doctor Marks said, making his presence in the room known. Neil was a little disgruntled by the reaction time. Doctor Marks was tall and a few years older than the twins, which was to say he was young, but he’d apparently been working in the hospital since graduation. Even through his coat, you could see that his arms were corded with muscles and his head was shaved to a fuzzy buzz cut. Neil had had a few conversations with the man over the few days in the hospital, he was fairly easy going and patient for a doctor in an intensive care unit. Neil moved so that Andrew could see his doctor, and immediately Andrew’s hand clamped around Neil’s like a vice and his heartrate monitor announced his anxiety.

“Hey, it’s okay, this is Doctor Marks,” Neil said. Andrew huffed out of his nose and shifted closer to Aaron, away from the doctor.

“Yeah man, you’re safe. I just want to get that tube out of your throat, ask you some questions and shine my torch in your eyes, and if you have any questions for me I can answer them,” he said in his deep, booming voice. He stepped closer and Andrew’s heart picked up again, his already tight grip getting tighter. Neil glanced over at him and saw him fingerspelling with his free hand. Aaron went miraculously paler.

“Neil, can you give him his hand?” Aaron asked. Neil let go, concern tight in his stomach. Andrew told Aaron something more and the twin nodded his head slowly. Neil could recognise the vulnerability on his husband’s face, but it wasn’t until Aaron spoke again could he place where it came from. “Hey, Doctor Marks, I will need to take out the tube. Andrew’s panic response is triggered enough as it is without you coming closer.” Neil had no trouble reading between the lines. _Drake._ The doctor, with his buzzcut and imposing stature, reminded Andrew of Drake.

“You are a student, not a doctor, I cannot let you take it out,” Doctor Marks said firmly. Neil felt tension coiling in his shoulders, and he rose from his seat a little, ready to defend or fight for Andrew even if he’d be fighting a medical professional. “If anxiety is the issue, we can have a nurse give him some…” Doctor Marks trailed off when Aaron held his hand up.

“He’s in here after a drug overdose of ketamine and Rohypnol and you want to dose him again with Xanax?” He said with a derisive tone. Neil didn’t think they would actually give him Xanax, but some sedative or another, but no matter what Neil wasn’t impressed with the idea.

“You can’t be serious right now,” Doctor Marks said, eyebrow raised. Apparently, the expression on the faces of the three men in front of him seemed to give him pause. “You are serious.”

“Either you try and do it and watch him yank it out himself, or you let me do it,” Aaron challenged. Doctor Marks shook his head in disbelief, but after a long moment filled with the strange inhale and exhale sounds of Andrew behind Neil, the doctor put his clipboard aside.

“If I can come closer to supervise,” he relented. Neil was more than a little surprised that it worked, and he looked over his shoulder to see Andrew and Aaron signing at each other.

“If you keep your hands in your pocket,” Aaron said, the pair of them reaching a compromise. Doctor Marks raised his eyebrows and walked closer, wedging his hands in the pocket of his coat. He situated himself at Neil’s side, but Neil stayed close to him when Andrew made eye contact with him, his eyes full of trust. If Doctor Marks moved unprovoked, Andrew was expecting Neil to put a stop to it. Neil appreciated that, and loved Andrew for it, but it was mildly daunting to expect himself to restrain a doctor. Still, he nodded once at Andrew who nodded back and straightened his head. Aaron spoke firmly, but calmly, explaining what Andrew needed to do and what to expect sensation wise. His hands didn’t shake as he did what he needed to do, and even though Andrew gagged violently, the tube came out easily. Aaron turned the machine off and couldn’t hide his proud smile. Andrew sat up, eyes momentarily crossing as he moved for the first time in days, and he leaned forward, coughing. Neil put his hand on his shoulder, looking into his face.

“You good?” Neil asked.

“I just had a tube pulled out of my lungs, what do you think?” He replied, voice hoarse and thick. Neil hadn’t realised how much he’d missed hearing him speak until he did, but it made his throat close around tears. Neil smiled and pressed a quick kiss to his warm, flushed cheeks. Andrew leaned into him for a second before sitting up straighter.

“Do you mind if I shine my torch in your eyes now? I don’t need to touch, and I don’t need to move, you just need to face me,” Doctor Marks said. Andrew gritted his teeth, but when Neil moved a step to the side, he turned his face and looked at the doctor. Doctor Marks did his test and asked Andrew some questions, and when he was satisfied, he stepped back.   
“Do you have any questions for me?”

“When can I leave?” Andrew asked immediately. Neil and Aaron looked at each other and rolled their eyes.

“You have to stay in ICU for another twenty-four hours for supervision, then we’ll put you in a ward for another night and if there are no complications, you can go,” Doctor Marks explained. Two days, that wasn’t too bad. Andrew didn’t look thrilled by this, but he didn’t say anything. “Do you have any more questions?”

“Not for you,” Andrew answered, a clear dismissal in his voice. Doctor Marks looked as if he might have preferred Andrew when he was unconscious, but he put his hands back in his pockets and backed out of the room without a word, collecting his clipboard at the last moment.

“Does that mean questions for us?” Neil asked when the door closed.

“How long have you been here, where can I brush my teeth, I need a drink of water, and what the fuck do you mean I died?” He demanded. Neil and Aaron met each other's gaze, wondering who was going to explain and both willing to let the other bite the bullet. "Okay, and when the fuck did that happen?" Andrew snapped, gesturing at the two of them. "Before I died, you two barely tolerated each other and now, what? You're friends?"

"I wouldn't say friends," Aaron said.

"More like reluctant allies," Neil agreed.

"I'm going back to sleep," Andrew muttered.

"You weren't sleeping!" Aaron reminded him.

"Yeah, that was a coma," Neil added. Andrew scowled at them, but when Neil handed him a drink bottle, his expression softened a little as he turned his attention to it. He got halfway through the water before he opened his eyes, frowning up at the ceiling and taking the bottle from his mouth, handing it to Neil.

"Why is there a Lion on my roof?" He demanded. Neil and Aaron both looked up at the helium balloon.

"Josh and Calum sent it," Neil answered. Andrew looked around the room, taking in the flowers and the stuffed toy, the cards and pictures, and the puzzle.

"This is all disgusting," he said. Neil didn't believe him.

"Do you want to read the cards and stuff?" He offered. Andrew crossed his arms and leaned back in the bed.

"No, I want you to answer my other questions. Like about how I died," he said.

"Alright, drama queen," Neil said, getting comfortable in his seat. He explained what happened the best he could, keeping it clinical and removed from emotion. Aaron interjected with his version of events from time to time but kept it as clean and emotionless as Neil did. When Neil explained about the group chat and who had come to Columbia when they'd all heard the news, Andrew closed his eyes for a long moment and Neil fell silent. He used the lull to message the group chat: _He's awake! He'll be allowed visitors from tomorrow._ He immediately muted the chat and put his phone away. Across from him, Aaron's phone started buzzing with notifications and he immediately muted the chat as well. Andrew opened his eyes and glared down at the needles in his arms, but before anyone could speak, Nurse Carmichael came in with a cheery hello.

"I heard you're awake, Mr. Minyard! I'm your nurse, you can call me Jude," she said. Andrew didn't greet her, but he tilted his head to acknowledge her.

"Hey Jude," Aaron said.

"Aaron, Neil, my favourites of course," she said breezily. "So, Mr. Minyard, we're going to keep you hooked up to the heart rate machine after the little scare from a couple days ago, and the drip in your left arm as well, but I'm going to take everything else out and hook you up to portable machines so you can go for a walk later if you feel like it. Sound good?" She said. Andrew nodded once, but he looked at Aaron and Neil when he spoke.

"You two, out," he said firmly. Neil didn't really see a reason to argue or protest, so he rose from his seat and Aaron did the same. They went into the hall and leaned against the wall shoulder to shoulder with their heads lolled forward. Neil took a deep breath and Aaron nudged him in the ribs.

"He did it," he said. Neil nodded his head, feeling the weight of the last 3 days lift from his shoulders and he straightened up.

"He fucking did," he confirmed.

"Meeting God clearly didn't change his attitude," Aaron said with a shake of his head and a smile. Neil laughed, imagining what would have happened if Andrew woke up a changed man.

"He probably fought God and that's why he didn't die," Neil said. Aaron considered that for a moment before snorting in amusement at his own thought.

"Is it pack rules? If he fought God and won, does that making him God now?" He asked.

"I hope not," Neil answered with a smirk.

Nurse Carmichael came out after a few minutes and smiled at them.

"He said 'send the idiots back in so I can send them home'," she told them. Neil and Aaron sighed, but Aaron thanked her as they passed her back into the room.

"Go home," Andrew said the second the door was closed behind them. He was in a clean, closed hospital gown, his hair brushed, and he only had two cords attached to him- the IV drip in his elbow and the heart rate machine clipped to his finger instead of plastered all over his chest.

"Why would I go back to Chicago when you're here and the cats are at Nicky's house?" Neil replied easily, sitting down. "Bitch and moan all you want, Drew, I'm not leaving this hospital."

"I'm not either," Aaron agreed. Andrew surveyed Neil for a long moment.

"Go home, Aaron. You've done enough, and I'm not going to die. See Katelyn, celebrate our birthday for the both of us. Just don't do it here," Andrew said, turning his attention from Neil. Neil decided that was as close as he was going to get to an invite to stay.

"And what if I want to finish the puzzle?" Aaron argued like a child.

"You don't want to finish the puzzle," Neil and Andrew said at the same time. Aaron uncrossed his arms, resolve wavering.

"I'm fine, I'm alive, you did your duty, now fuck off," Andrew said, but he couldn't hide the small amount of gratitude in his words. Aaron hesitated again, but slowly he nodded his head.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," Andrew said firmly. Neil peered at him, but he saw only truth.

"It's fine," Neil promised Aaron.

"Now?" Aaron checked.

"Now," Andrew confirmed, lying down.

"I'll come back tomorrow," Aaron told him.

"Don't."

"I'm going to."

"Fine," Andrew conceded with a sigh. Aaron looked smug as he went about gathering his things. Neil stayed in his seat as Aaron packed up, holding his drink bottle out for Andrew again. He pulled himself into a seated position, crossing his legs in front of him, and took much slower sips. Neil suspected his empty, abused stomach had resented the inundation of fluid before and he was paying the price. Andrew saw him watching and made a face.

"Why are staring at me?"

"It's just good to see you moving again," Neil admitted.

"I'm leaving before this gets sappy," Aaron said. "See you tomorrow."

"Bye," Neil agreed, and Andrew hummed around the drink bottle. Aaron closed the door and the room was plunged again into the steady, hospital silence. It was probably the quietest the room had actually been, the whirring of the breathing machine gone, the other monitors turned off. Just the familiar beep of the heart rate monitor bumping and jumping with Andrew's consciousness. "Now what?" Neil asked him. Andrew moved over on the thin, narrow hospital bed, and Neil saw the invitation. "Really? It's a small bed."

"We're small people," Andrew shot back, sounding strange as he tried not to dribble the mouthful of water he had.

"You look ridiculous," Neil told him. Andrew swallowed and licked the drop of water from the corner of his mouth. Neil smiled and toed out of his shoes before climbing up onto the bed. Andrew put the drink bottle on the table beside his bed and held the blanket up for Neil to climb under. He was warm, and solid, and awake, and when they wriggled down to lie back, Andrew put his arm around Neil's shoulders and pulled him into his chest. Neil squeezed his eyes shut and kissed his collarbone.

"Don't cry," Andrew said. Neil laughed and lifted his head, looking into his face.

"I missed you," he said quietly. "Can I kiss you?" He asked. Andrew raised an eyebrow.

"My mouth tastes and feels like cardboard," he said.

"I don't care," Neil said and he meant it. Andrew looked supremely unimpressed by that, but when he said yes and Neil pressed their mouths together, the heart rate monitor at their side beeped a little faster and Neil smiled against his lips.

*

Neil woke up curled into Andrew's side on the hospital bed. They'd spent all morning the day before in the bed, then Andrew had been allowed to go for a walk to the cafeteria and try to eat lunch. Then Neil had been relegated to his puzzle while Andrew threw up everything he'd eaten and complained he was dying again. His tortured stomach kept dinner down and he'd fallen asleep to Neil reading his book after making Neil promise he'd sleep in the bed. Every half hour he'd had to move, but that was no different to the past couple of nights, he'd just been grateful no one told them off.

"I hate everything," Andrew grumbled as they stirred awake around the same time in the morning.

"Yeah, you thought King and Sir were bad. Nurses are worse," Neil agreed.

"Oh fabulous, you're both awake! We're going to move Andrew to a room with a bathroom and visitation rights," Nurse Carmichael said, coming into the room. Neil rolled from the bed stiffly and Andrew rose into a seated position, rubbing his eyes.

"Tell me you have a toothbrush in your bag," Andrew said.

"Only mine," Neil admitted.

"That'll do," Andrew said.

"That's gross," Neil told him. The look Andrew shot him spoke volumes and Neil shrugged. "True, you've done worse."

"Get me out of here," Andrew said, looking at the nurse. She came into the room and busied herself setting up the bed for transfer before leaning out of the room and signalling one of her co-workers. The second nurse was tiny and blonde and spoke with an Irish accent, but she didn't say all that much. Neil followed the bed as it got pushed along, and the nurses let Andrew stay in a seated position, his arms and legs crossed as they went.

"If you want a shower and to brush your teeth, I'll need to hang around because we'll have you unattached from your machine," Jude said brightly.

"Will you be sticking me with another needle when I'm done?" Andrew asked, looking away as she took his IV out.

"No, you'll be eating breakfast and we'll monitor your body's response to that, but if you keep it down, no more needles. Just the clip on your finger that'll make sure to let us know you're alive. If you take it off, it flatlines, and half the hospital comes running," she answered. "Shower time," she added. Andrew slid from his bed and took a long moment to appreciate being able to lift his arms freely above his head.

"You can get lost for twenty minutes, find me something with sugar in it," Andrew told Neil.

"Can I now?" Neil replied.

"Yep."

"Not too much sugar," Jude put in.

"Then what's the point?" Andrew groaned.

"You're not supposed to have any sugar at all, so you best not argue," Jude said with a laugh. Andrew let his hands fall to his side with a slap as he peered at her, but then he nodded and just like that, the young woman had earned his trust.

"I'll be back in twenty," Neil promised, putting his wallet in his pocket and dropping the duffel next to the bed. The Irish nurse was returning when Neil turned around, carrying the flowers and the pictures, the cards and the bears, a disgruntled look on her face. The helium lion was trailing behind her. Neil smirked and left her to set it up, going in search of food and caffeine.

*

Neil returned to the room about thirty minutes later with food from the café down the road to the hospital. He had two fresh bacon and egg rolls, a hot chocolate, and a double shot latte in hand when he pushed the door open. Andrew was sitting cross-legged on the bed again, his hair damp and dark gold, colour in his face again. He had on his oldest, most worn-out grey sweatpants and a soft V-neck sweater. He looked up when Neil came in and Neil smiled at him, his smile only growing when Andrew’s heartrate monitor announced that seeing him had made Andrew’s heart speed up again.   
“Don’t get a big head, it’s for the food,” Andrew muttered, his hand reaching out. Neil crossed the room, feeling happier than he had in days, and put his hand in Andrew’s.

“Sure, whatever you say,” Neil said. Andrew reached out with his other hand and Neil nodded at the hot chocolate so he could take it. Andrew took a mouthful and closed his eyes in bliss. Neil put the food on his lap and sat down next to him with his own drink. Neil let go of his hand so he could put his arm around Andrew’s shoulder and pull him close. He peppered kisses across Andrew’s cheeks and nose and into his hair and for the first time, maybe ever, Andrew closed his eyes and leaned into it, and he didn’t deny that the change in his heartrate was because Neil loved him.

They ate their breakfast and lay down to channel surf on the TV mounted on the wall, but when nothing caught their eyes, Andrew curled into a ball with his face against Neil’s neck and dozed. Neil held onto him, knowing he would stay like that as long as he could and as long as Andrew wanted him to. He felt as if he’d been taking every touch, every kiss, every hug for granted recently, and now he could feel himself absorbing and appreciating them, every moment he could. He kissed the top of Andrew’s head and his husband mumbled something that sounded like ‘one hundred and ten percent’ before rubbing his nose against Neil’s neck and sighing in contentment. Neil smiled and closed his eyes, and even in a tiny hospital room, after the longest weekend of Neil’s life, he felt at home again and when his body begged him for sleep, to catch up on what he’d lost, Neil let go and sank into oblivion.

Neil and Andrew were woken up from their impromptu morning nap by the doctor on duty, who gently woke Neil up first with a tap on his shoulder. It was probably for the best because when Neil nudged Andrew awake, his husband started violently and if Neil hadn’t been prepared, he would have gotten a fist to the nose.   
“Easy, just me and Doctor Hester,” Neil said quietly. The older woman looked alarmed by the violent wake up, but she didn’t say anything about it.

“Good afternoon, I’m just here to do a quick check-up,” she said. Neil climbed from the bed and Andrew sullenly did what was needed for the doctor to her job. When she was finished, she smiled and sat down on one of the chairs near the bed. “So, there seems to be no long term-damage, which is good news. You’ll be back to your full-time Exy career by the end of the month, but you will need to do some physio for a couple of weeks just to make sure your lungs are still co-operating after the complications we had. We’ll sign you over to the care of your team practitioners tomorrow afternoon when you’re discharged,” she explained.

“Do you have to?” Andrew asked. Neil was too busy feeling relieved to send him a look, but Andrew smirked at him as if he’d done it anyway.

“We do have to,” she answered, standing back up. She dug around in her pocket and found a slip of paper, handing it to Andrew. “Jude, a nurse you would be familiar with, asked me to give you this. You have some visitors in the waiting room, but there’s a few so she wanted to tell you who it was before she started sending them in.”

“Who is it?” Neil asked after thanking the doctor and she departed. Andrew looked up from the list with wide eyes, not even trying to hide the complex emotions or the vulnerability.

“Everyone,” he said quietly. “Everyone is here to see me.” He held the list out to Neil for him to read.

  * _Kevin_
  * _Allison_
  * _Renee_
  * _Nicky_
  * _Erik_
  * _David Wymack_
  * _Abby_
  * _Dobson_
  * _Matt_
  * _Dan & Holly_
  * _Aaron_
  * _Heather (Harper, Jess, Kate??)_
  * _Will_
  * _Jackson_
  * _Oscar_
  * _Dante_
  * _Jaiden_
  * _Olivia_
  * _Roland_



“A lot of people were worried,” Neil said, folding the paper up and sliding it into the picture frame of the First Foxes. Andrew folded his arms across his chest and stuck his chin out.

“Disgusting.”

“Your heart is calling you a liar,” Neil pointed out. It was true, his machine was announcing very clearly that Andrew was feeling strongly about the turn out in support.

“Disgusting,” he repeated. Neil smiled and climbed back onto the bed, kissing his forehead.

“You are loved, and you are cared about, and as scary as that might be, and as hard as you may have tried in the past, there is nothing you can do to stop it,” Neil told him. Andrew curled his fingers in Neil’s hoodie and pressed his face into his chest.

“I don’t know if I like that,” Andrew muttered, voice muffled. “Threatening me with a support network,” he added. Neil felt warmth blooming in his chest as he held him close and let him breath, process, and prepare. He was just happy to have him back.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thanks so much for reading!  
> If you want to talk to me, head over to Tumblr! My urls are: @tsc-living @shippinggayandallthatjazz and @andrew-is-foxy  
> I also cosplay and post book related content on TikTok under @rory_reads
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated, as is constructive criticism! <3


End file.
